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prompt : ( Seungmin x Reader ) Seungmin breaks up with you to join the JYP Nation. You understand, of course, but it’s taking a toll on both of you.

genre :angst

word count :1.7k

muse insp :GOT7 • Never Ever (spotify ,soundcloud)

You and Seungmin had always been close. You met in middle school, initially; you sat next to each other in a couple classes and your friend groups merged over time. The two of you formed a more romantic relationship in your last year of middle school, and it really blossomed as you converted into high school. The two of you were inseparable, truly; you were attached by the hip and, in your mind, nothing would tear your love apart.

You, however, stood corrected.

Seungmin, you knew, was amazing at singing, and he loved performing. He wanted to go on to be an idol, and you supported him. You knew it would end your relationship. But you didn’t care, because you loved him and all you wanted was for your Minnie to be happy. However, you were still struck with grief when he broke the news that he was accepted and that the relationship you’d grown to love so much was going to have to end.

You could still remember the day, an hour, the clothes you both wore, every detail. You were on the couch, waiting for him to drop by and tell you the news. You weren’t sure how to feel; if he were to get rejected, he would be upset and feel insecure about his talent, because he could be rather sensitive. But if he was accepted and got into the trainee program, you would lose him forever.

You were truly at a loss.

That being said, he eventually showed up about ten minutes late. You didn’t mind, it wasn’t your place to judge why he’d been late. But as you stood with a bright smile, clad in one of his shirts and simple shorts, your phone dropped from your small hand as you realized that his eyes were red and his cheeks were streaked with tears. Your instinct was to rush over to him and hug him, kiss his tears away, shush him and whisper sweet nothings into his ears, but your movements were delayed. You took slow, short strides to where he stood. His school bag slid over his shoulder and landed on the floor.

“Seungmin,” Your words came out in a feathery breath as you stepped closer, bringing your soft hands up to cup his face, “What’s wrong? What did they say?”

He leaned into your touch, closing his eyes tightly as he fought another sob from ripping out of his throat. “Lamb,” He mumbled, “They won’t… Let us. You- you have to.. Understand..”

Your eyes widened as they glazed with panic, you dropped your hands from his cheeks, “What.. do you mean? Is this it for.. For us?”

Your lover’s eyes shot open, and he struggled to step closer to you, to touch you. “Please,” He whimpered, “Please understand. I’m sorry.”

Your lips pursed into a thin line as you took a tiny step back, fighting the tears that threatened to escape your eyes. You knew what this meant; Seungmin got in, and they told him the truth. You’d been expecting this. But damn, it still hurt like hell.

“I don’t have a choice,” He continued, his lips quivering and his voice breaking, “Please. I love you.”

A sob forced its way out of you, your body jerking with the motion as your throat and eyes burned. “I understand. I know this is what you want. And I’m okay with that. But… It just hurts, Minnie… It hurts. You do have a choice. But I would never pressure you to make that choice.”

Seungmin’s eyes grew wide as the tears he’d been trying to hold back cascaded down his cheeks. He wanted nothing more than you hug you, to tell you everything was going to be okay, to tell you how much he loved you and that he’d never let you go.

But he was letting you go.

You let a sad, teary smile grow onto your face as you looked up at him. “Go, Kim Seungmin,” You said, “Go live your dreams. Be happy. Forget about me, please, because I don’t want to weigh you down.”

The older boy opened his mouth to protest, to which you cut him off before he could even say anything, “This is what you’ve been wanting. So I will support you because I love you. I want to be with you, but it looks like it just wasn’t meant to be that way, and that’s okay.”

All he could do was sob. He didn’t deserve you. You were so understanding, too sweet. Too perfect.

You didn’t deserve to be tossed away like this. You deserved better. Much better than Seungmin.

Once you finished talking, your dam broke; you started sobbing and crying like it was the key to keeping you alive. You covered your wet face as your emotions – your pain – spilt out of you. You didn’t know what you were going to do without Seungmin. He was your everything. Your light, your sun, your stars, your world. Without him, there would simply be a gaping hole in your heart.

The two of you cried together for some time. What else was there to do? Neither one of you could form coherent words. That is until you screamed for him to leave. It was shrill, and lacking all anger; just pain.

Unable to stand to see you like that, unable to cope with what he’d done to you, Seungmin rushed out of the house.

All contact was broken with him after that.

* * *

You were nothing but a hollow shell of a person for two months after the breakup. You sat in your dark room and stared at pictures of him, or pictures of you and him together. You didn’t eat much, and at school, you didn’t talk to anyone. It seemed the others around you knew to leave you be, word of the breakup spread fast – you were the “it” couple, after all. With gossip, comes rumours. Most of your classmates knew the truth because Seungmin going into idol business was pretty big and it spread fast. But there are always those ignorant few who feel the need to stir up drama wherever they go. The biggest one was cheating, which you felt disgusted by. Why would someone assume that either you or Seungmin cheated on the other? Cheating is a horrible thing to do and it’s something you despise with the entirety of your being. That being said, you did not like the scandalous rumours arising in the school halls.

Come summer, you feel a little bit better. Your childhood friend, Benji, had been texting you and cheering you up. He lived in America and had lived there for some time, now. It was a random day that he said something crazy, but something that promised you a new future. Something that you found yourself wanting to do more than anything.

He wanted you to move to America and live with him and his girlfriend.

So, you thought, fuck it. Why the hell not?

After discussing it with your parents, who surprisingly allowed you to go, you packed your things and were sent to California only three weeks later.

There, your new life began. You dyed your hair, started wearing a little more makeup, started working out; you really wanted and took advantage of this “new start.” You became a different person. You were thriving, and you loved it. Seungmin was pushed to the back of your mind. In fact, after almost a year, you barely thought about him at all.

Sometimes, though, you missed him. You missed his soft touches, his lips on yours, his soft brown eyes boring into your own. But you knew that what happened was for the best. With that in mind, you pushed everything back and focussed on your new life.

Once again, finally, you were happy.

* * *

Though you lived in America, your family remained in Seoul. Thus, obviously, you would have to visit from time to time, which you didn’t mind.

It was on one of these simple trips, you were staying in a hotel that was in the city with your two friends whom you lived with. It was late, probably around midnight, and you were craving chocolate more than anything. So, by God and everything holy, you went out to buy some damn chocolate.

Little did you realize just how scary the streets of Seoul were.

You had the hood of your grey hoodie up over your hair, and your hands were shoved in your pockets. The darkness, save for the streetlights, seemed to leak from the alleyways and claw at you. Every small noise made you jump and turn to see what it was. Life was different, come the shadows and darkness of the night.

You made a quick trip to the small 24-hour convenience store. The clerk was a woman in her thirties, she read a magazine with drooping eyelids. You made sure to make your purchase quick.

While she was ringing you up, you glanced outside the window, and what you saw made your heart jump to your throat. There, looking into the store, and probably at you, was a man in a black hoodie with the hood pulled over his head. His dark brown eyes stared into your own, they were unreadable. He walked away seconds after you made eye contact.

You pursed your lips, paid for the chocolate, and left the store. Slipping the sweet candy into your pocket, you rushed down the street, listening for footsteps and watching for the strange man. You didn’t like the feeling in the pit of your stomach; the fear and the dread.

Then you heard them. Quick, heavy footsteps behind you. They, along with your irregular heartbeat, pounded in your ears and pulsed through your veins.

You started speeding up, running as your hood fell in the rush.

“Wait!” A heart-breakingly familiar voice called out from behind you.

You stopped in your tracks and turned to face the person, the same one you saw in the window, except his hood, too, had fallen while running. His newly dyed reddish brown hair swayed in the small breeze and shone in the dim light of the streetlight next to him. His deep, almond-shaped eyes were wide and bore into your own with something unreadable in them. His lips were parted slightly in shock as he panted quietly from the running he’d done to catch up with you. Your eyes became the size as plates, your lungs felt heavy and empty at the same time, your heartbeat continued to rattle your bones.

“Seungmin?”

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