Note: Just a little something I wrote awhile ago. A Haunting of Hill House AU/reimagining. Knowledge of Hill House not required but certain events are referred to in the story without explanation but I don’t really think prior knowledge is required. I love the sibling dynamics of Hill House and how they explored and dealt with grief (and I can’t help thinking that Steve was done dirty in the show). I just wanted to explore what would happen if the Largos found themselves in a similar situation. Setting is current world so the Largos may not be as…extreme as they are in Repo but they’re still every bit as broken. Enjoy
Summary: “The person who completes suicide, dies once. Those left behind die a thousand deaths, trying to relive those terrible moments and understand…why?” - Clark 20 years ago, their mother’s suicide tore their family apart. But slowly, they picked up the fragile pieces and put their lives together. Then one call, a second suicide, threatens to destroy those fragile pieces holding them together.
Luigi pushed open the door. He nearly jumped at his sister standing silently in the hall staring quietly at him. “Fucking hell Amber. You scared the fuck out of everyone.” He growled. His sister didn’t say anything. She just stared at him, shaking. “The fuck is wrong with you?” He took a step towards her. His phone rang. He gave a quick glance at his shaking sister before glancing at the caller ID. Fucking fantastic. He answered the call. “Pops. You don’t have to come. She’s-”
“She lied.” Rotti’s voice was thick. “She went back to the house.”
“Pops. I’m not living there anymore.” Amber just continued staring at him. “She came to-”
“Mag called. They…they found her.”
Mag? Mag as in Magdelene Defoe? That was a name he hadn’t heard in years. She was their old housekeeper at their summer home. He must have met her only a handful of times. Last he heard, he was still staying at that house. He glanced at his sister again. “Pops, listen to me. Amb-”
“Amber…she…she’s dead.”
Luigi’s heart dropped. He looked at his sister again. “No pops. She’s right-”
“Mag found her body. She…she killed herself.”
What was he going on about? Amber was right here. He turned. She appeared right in front of him. She turned white right in front of his eyes. Blood trailed down her eyes like tears. Her eyes turned white. She opened her mouth and screamed. She crumpled to dust before him.
“Luigi?”
The phone dropped from his hands as he stared at the spot his sister had been. “Car…Carmela?”
‘Amber…she…she’s dead.”
No. No, she was right here. She was right in front of him. She was right here. “Amber, where the fuck are you? This isn’t fucking funny!” She was messing with him. A big practical joke. That was it. “Amber!?”
‘She…she killed herself.’
No. Pops was wrong. Mag was wrong. She saw someone else. How the fuck would Mag even know what Amber looked like? She got the wrong person. Some junkie or something broke into their old house and killed herself there. That was is. She just got the wrong person.
He picked up the phone and ignored Rotti shouting his name. He shut the call. He scrolled to find his sister’s number. It rang. Pick up. It rang. Fucking pick up. It rang. Please pick the fuck up. The call connected. “Finally. You stupid sl-”
“This is Detective Wayne speaking. Who is this? May I know how you are related to the owner of this phone?”
“Lu…Luigi Largo. I…I’m her brother.” No.
“We would like to apologize, Mr Largo.” No. “The owner of this phone was found dead in Hill Manor. We will need someone to come in to identify her-” No. The phone clattered to the ground. No. He looked at the spot where his sister had appeared before him. She was right there. She was right… Not even dust stood where his sister had crumbled.
“Amber?” He croaked. “Carmela?” Nothing answered him. All he could think of was when was the last time he spoke to his sister? Why couldn’t he remember the last time he spoke to her? If he had tried to keep in contact, would he have realized something was wrong? Why would she kill herself? Why?
A choke cry escaped his lips. No. His sister couldn’t be dead. His baby sister couldn’t be… He crumpled to the ground. Choked sobs escaped his lips. Not his sister. Not his baby sister.
***
Pavi glanced at the entrance and his face fell as he realized who just walked in. Wonderful. He scanned the bar trying to find an exit. Fuck. His brother spotted him and headed straight towards him.
“You didn’t pick up any of my calls.”
“Was-a busy.”
“Did pops call you?”
“Didn’t-a feel like-a picking up his-a calls either.”
“Pavi, we need to talk.”
“I’m-a busy.” He smiled at the girl at the other end of the bar and told the bartender to send her a drink.”
“I’m fucking serious, Pavi.”
Pavi rolled his eyes. “Oh, now-a you want to talk-a.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Pavi smiled bitterly. “Nothing, fratello. Absolutely nothing.” He headed towards the girl who accepted the drink. A hand grabbed his jacket.
“Paviche, please.”
Pavi raised his eyebrow at both the name and the magic word. Since when did his brother ever learn to use please? He finally turned to his brother and actually looked at him.
Something was wrong.
He looked fine enough. His suit was pristine as ever, every hair in place. But his face. Something was off. Did he look this aged the last time he saw him? There was a haunted look in his eyes. And his hand shook when he thought Pavi wasn’t looking. Was he sick?
“Fine, fratello. One last-a drink and then we’ll go.” He turned to the bartender. “Two glasses of whisky.”
“Make it double.”
Pavi just shrugged. The bartender poured them their orders. Luigi took the glass and downed it. “You’re not-a making me go any faster, fratello.” He took the drink and sipped it, watching his brother. If Luigi was sick, he should have been cut off from alcohol right? Papa had been calling too. Was it papa? Was papa sick? A pit settled at the bottom of his stomach. He finished his drink and followed Luigi outside. “Ok, talk.”
Luigi just pointed at his car. Pavi nodded and followed. He looked at Luigi trying to figure what was wrong but Luigi would only stare ahead, refusing to catch his eye. Pavi got in. “What is it fratello that it-a couldn’t wait until morning?”
He watched his brother’s hands tremble. He gripped the steering wheel and his knuckles turned white. “It’s…” Luigi swallowed. Something was very wrong. “It’s Amber. She killed herself.”
An icy pit filled him. “No.”
“Pops was at the police station this morning to identify the body. The coroner confirmed it was suicide.”
He couldn’t breathe. “No.”
“She hung herself. She would have died instantly.”
Pavi grabbed Luigi’s ascot and forced him to face him, his heartbeat pounding in his ears. Luigi refused to look at him. “What do you mean…What do you mean killed herself? Why would-a she kill herself?”
“I…I was hoping you would know. You two have always been close.”
Pavi choked as his chest tightened. How could Amber have done this? She told him everything. She always told him everything. Why wouldn’t she have told him something was wrong. “She wouldn’t.” He choked out. “She wouldn’t have. Not-a after mama. Not-a after she knew what-a mama put us through.”
“There was no sign of a struggle.”
“She…she called-a me two days ago. I…I was-a busy. I didn’t-a think it was-a urgent. I…I called her last night. She didn’t-a…Oh god. I thought-a if it was important she would have called back. I didn’t-a…I didn’t-a pick up. If I had-a picked up…she-”
“You don’t know that.”
“I could have stopped her.”
“She called pops too. She didn’t say anything about what she was planning. She lied to him and said she was coming to LA to find one of us.” Luigi paused, his voice becoming small. “She called you. She called pops. She didn’t…whatever she was going through, she didn’t think she could have come to me.” Luigi’s gripped tightened as his nails dug into his palm.
“She didn’t-a leave a note? Anything?”
“No.”
Silence fell on them. They both just sat there staring forward, unable to say anything. With a shuddering breath, Luigi turned on the engine. Pavi hadn’t noticed where they were going until he stopped in front of his house.
“What-a now?” Pavi said quietly.
“Once the paperwork’s done, they’re sending her body to Shilo’s. We’ll have the funeral there. We’re flying down tomorrow.”
Pavi nodded silently. He numbly thanked his brother for the ride and staggered into the house.
***
Luigi stepped out of the rental, staring at Shilo’s place. ‘Eternal Peace’. Fuck whoever came up with that name. Everything in him was screaming at him to turn and run. He didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want to do this.
“Shilo.” Pavi greeted warmly as he hugged her.
Shilo released him and turned towards Luigi who just glared at her, daring her to touch him. She just raised her hands in defense. But still smiled warmly at him. Everything in him wanted to knock that smile off her fucking face.
“Your dad’s waiting inside. Come in.”
He wanted to run.
They followed Shilo into the funeral house.
He wanted to run.
Rotti was sitting on the couch waiting for them.
He wanted to run.
Rotti stood. “Pavi, Luigi.”
“Papa.”
“Pops.” He greeted shortly. They stood there awkwardly just staring at each other. If he turned around now, he could catch the next flight out of there.
“Do you want to see her?” Shilo asked kindly.
No.
Pavi nodded. They both followed her into the parlor. He saw the coffin and his chest clenched and he just couldn’t. He turned away and headed straight for the alcohol. He couldn’t see her like that. He couldn’t make it real. His hands shook as he poured himself a glass of whisky.
“Sorella.”
Luigi clenched his eyes shut at Pavi’s broken cry. If he walked out right now, he could still pretend she was still alive. They barely kept in contact anyway. He could still pretend she was happily living her life somewhere else. He could-
“She left a voicemail two days ago, worried about Pavi.” He overheard Shilo talking to their father. “I…I didn’t think much of it. I left a voicemail telling her I called Pavi and that he was still in LA and that he was fine. But…I don’t know if she got it.”
Amber called Shilo but not him. She called everyone but not him. Pavi picked up Shilo’s call but not his. He drained the glass.
He numbly listened to Pavi’s cries when Shilo approached him. “You should see her before the wake tomorrow. It would be easier.”
“Nothing about this is fucking easy.”
“Don’t bite my head off. I’m trying to help.”
“Yes, help. With your smiles and your cheer. Forgetting of course our sister is dead!”
“Our sister now is it? After you’ve told me repeatedly that I’d never be one of you.”
“No. Never!” He hissed. “But to her,” His hand shook as he gestured at the coffin. “To her, you were.”
“You think this is easy? Standing here, pretending, smiling, doing my fucking job because it’s the only way I know how to help. The only way I can help.” He voice broke. “She was my sister too.”
‘No, she wasn’t.’ He wanted to say. He wanted to lash out and make them hurt as much as he did. He wanted to scream and curse and yell. But Shilo was right. Amber was always close to Shilo. And Amber called Shilo, not him. He didn’t count. He drained the glass. He poured another and drained it for good measure.
He heard footsteps behind him. He poured and offered Pavi a drink.
“Let’s sit in the hall.” Shilo said quietly.
Luigi nodded stiffly and took the bottle. They just sat in silence.
“Why…why would she do this?”
“She went to the house mom killed herself in and offed herself the same fucking way mom did. Want to wager a fucking guess?”
“I…I barely remember mama. Sorella…Sorella was-a younger. She’d…she’d have-a remembered less. It couldn’t-a…it couldn’t have-a been that.”
“She called me the night before.” Rotti said solemnly. “She said she was being haunted by the Bent-Neck-Lady.”
“Here we fucking go again. More fucking ghost stories.”
“Just because you never saw the ghosts doesn’t mean they weren’t there!” Shilo cried. She was always so fucking adamant the house was haunted.
“Are you listening to yourself? Do you know how fucking insane you sound?”
“Even if you never saw anything…you would have at least heard the banging on the walls? Or the crying in the middle of the night?”
“It was the pipes. And the only crying I ever heard were the three of you after claiming you saw a ghost.”
“Did you really not see anything?”
A flash of his sister’s face in his apartment. “No. Never.” He turned to his father. “So, what? She went back to the house to look for ghosts?”
“I don’t know why she went back there. She told me she saw the bent neck lady and that she was going to fly to LA to look for the two of you. I didn’t know she went to the house.”
“Play the message.” He growled at Shilo.
She obliged. “Shilo…I need your…could you just check in on Pavi? Is he here? I don’t know…I…I can’t help but feel something’s wrong. I just…Call me.”
Luigi went stiff at his sister’s voice.
“Does that sound like someone who’s planning to kill themselves?”
No. But she did anyway. She left and they were down to 3.
“She was-a traumatized by the Bent-a Neck Lady. As I grew up-a, I figured what we-a saw in that-a house was just-a kids having overactive imagination. She always believed they were-a real. What if…she was-a trying to get away?”
“But why would she go back to that fucking house? If she really was so scared, why would she go back?”
No one could answer him. They just sat in a tense silence.
“Luigi?”
“What do you want, Carmela?”
“I’m scared.”
“Ghosts again, Carmela?”
“I’m scared of the Bent Neck Lady.”
“There’s no such thing.”
“She’s going to hurt me.”
“Go back to bed.”
“She’s going to kill me.”
“I won’t let her.”
“Promise, brother?”
He sighed. “Yea I promise. I’ll protect you, Carmela. I’ll always protect you.”
Smash. He looked down as the glass dug into his palm. He couldn’t feel the pain. Not from his hand at least. His chest however burned and threatened to give way.
He hadn’t heard Shilo leave to get the first aid kid. He hadn’t heard her come back. And he certainly didn’t know what she was doing when she grabbed his bleeding hand.
“Don’t touch me!” She shoved her to the ground.
“Fratello!” Pavi helped her up. Because she counted. She meant something. He didn’t. He was nothing. He never counted.
He couldn’t do this anymore. He had to get out of there. No more of this shit. No more playing happy family when this thing they had barely counted as that. He stumbled out the door before freezing. It was the wrong door. His eyes widened at his sister staring at him from behind the coffin. She looked so sad. No, not again. He had drunk too much. He was seeing things. She wasn’t there. The sound of breaking deafened him as his sister’s neck snapped and twisted to the side. But she just stared. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t scream. She wasn’t real.
He threw the empty whisky bottle at her. It went straight through her and shattered against the wall behind her. See? She wasn’t real. Just a figment of his grieving imagination. That’s all.
“Luigi!” Something grabbed him roughly and turned him around. Something collided into his cheek. It stung. Numbly he felt his cheek. He barely felt the glass in his hand tearing into it. “How dare you!” He choked out. He glanced back at the coffin and she was gone. They didn’t see her. Just a hallucination. Nothing more.
He pulled away from his father. Everything hurt and he needed to do something, feel something or it would crush him. “Oh, now you want to play father, is it?”
“Luigi, you’re drunk.” Shilo said quietly. “Don’t say something you’ll regret.”
“Regret? What’s there to fucking regret. After the fucking funeral, he’d disappear again and live his own fucking life. It doesn’t make a fucking difference to me!”
“That’s not fair. Amber has always tried to get us together. You always refused to come.”
“20 fucking year, too fucking late!”
“You’re making it sound like I had a choice. The court decided-”
“No! Don’t play the fucking court card. I was old enough to fucking remember! You didn’t even try to fight for us!”
“How dare-”
“You could have just said ‘my wife went crazy and killed herself’ but no, you had to go on about ghost stories. And then suddenly refuse to say a fucking thing. If course they would have refused you custody. You sounded like a fucking madman.”
“Enough!” Rotti growled dangerously. But he was beyond caring. And while his hand was numb, his stinging cheek throbbed. And at least it was something. At least it was something more than the crushing pain in his chest.
“I read the fucking police reports pops. The bruises, the cracked skull. Did you fucking beat Mom? Is that why-”
Luigi gasped on the ground, his nose throbbing in pain. “How dare you? Police reports? You have no idea what happened that night!”
“That’s because you won’t fucking tell us! We’re not kids anymore! Tell us the fucking truth!”
“You’re drunk and you’re making a scene. Go back to the hotel and sleep. Before you make a bigger mess tomorrow.”
“You’re the own who should have died. Not her.”
There was a loud bang. The table collapsed sending the coffin onto the ground. Amber hung loosely out of the coffin. Luigi stumbled back. He thought the pain in his chest couldn’t get worse. If he thought it would collapse before…now it was as if everything was trying to burst out of his chest. He stared at his sister. Not his sister. His sister’s body. Her body. There was nothing else in there. Just an empty fucking shell. Just like mom. Nothing in there. Just like mom. Dead. Just like mom.
He stumbled out of the parlor and collapsed to the round sobbing. His sister was gone. His sister was gone. He couldn’t protect her. Just like he couldn’t protect his mom.
He felt arms wrap around him. “It’s alright brother. Everything’s going to be alright brother. Please don’t cry.” He tried to grab the arms around him but they disappeared. No. Don’t go. Don’t leave me.
“The workers will be here early tomorrow morning. They can help lift the coffin. Everyone is tired and upset. Maybe we should call it a night.”
Pavi thanked her. “Come on, fratello.” He couldn’t answer him. He couldn’t move. He didn’t care. “Fratello.”
“Fuck off.”
“Fine. Find your own-a way to the hotel.”
Numbly, he heard them leave. He dropped his head into his hands, rocking back and forth. He felt something touch his hand but he couldn’t find it in him to pull away. He took shuddering breaths as the hands finally released him. She sat there next to him, saying nothing. He closed his eyes as he forced his emotions down.
“Why do you hate me so much? I get you not liking dad and mom. But…why do you hate me? You were alright with me that summer in Hill House. What changed?”
“You counted. Even though you weren’t her daughter, you counted.” And I didn’t.
“What? You hate me because your mother was nice to me? Is that it? She knew how weird things were for me. She was just being kind.”
He shook his head but said nothing. None of them read the police reports. His father managed to get them sealed off before the others turned 18. But he…he read them during the trial when they’d left him unsupervised, while his father made statement after statement. If he knew what was it he was seeing that night, would he have been able to stop it? But that didn’t matter, because reading that report, he finally understood. He didn’t count. He never counted.
“If you want to stay here, I have a spare bedroom. Or I can get you a cab?”
Luigi just shook his head. “The spare bedroom is just up the stairs. If you need anything just wake me.”
He heard Shilo leave. He looked at his right hand and it was bandaged. Shakily he got to his feet and approached the coffin on the ground. At least they put her back into the coffin. She looked…dead. “Amber?” Nothing replied. No ghosts. Just a hallucination. That was all.
***
Shilo woke the next morning. She checked the guestroom and Luigi wasn’t there. Of course he wouldn’t take anything from her. She headed downstairs when she realized the parlor lights were still on. Did Luigi forget to turn them off?
She headed to the parlor and froze. She too in the sight before her and sighed. Luigi was lying beside the coffin, holding Amber’s hand tightly in his.
“Why are you still up?”
“I don’t like the dark.”
“Then turn on the light.”
“Shi can’t sleep with the light on. And it is her room.”
Luigi glared at her. “Hey, I said it was fine.”
Luigi sighed. “Fine. I don’t think I can stand another night of Pavi crying out for…” He lay on the ground beside Amber’s bed.
“How will I know you’re still there?”
“Give me your hand.” He held her hand tightly in his. “I won’t let go alright? No one will take you.”
“Brother, is mommy coming back?”
She put a careful hand on Luigi’s shoulder.
“Carmela?”
“No.” She said softly. “The guests will be here soon. You can go upstairs and take a shower first.”
Luigi looked around, blinking. He sat up looked at the hand in his then at his sister. She watched the grief and realization wash into him. He nodded stiffly.
“I’ll call Pavi and ask him to bring a change of clothes.” He didn’t agree but he didn’t yell at her either. So she decided to take it as a yes. She headed to start preparing the place before the guests arrived. She looked up as the doorbell rang. She opened the door to see, “Dad. Mom.” She hugged them.
“How are you, Shi?”
“I’m handling things.”
She brought them into the parlour. Marni let out a sniff as tears ran down her face. Nathan held her. He didn’t cry but his eyes were red. Marni gently kissed Amber on the forehead. They turned to see Luigi staring at them. “Luigi.” Her mother said gently. “Are you alright?”
He just stared at them. Nathan placed a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t touch me.” It lacked his usual venom. “She’s not your daughter.” He muttered.
“We raised her Luigi. It counts.”
“No, it doesn’t.”
“Uncle Nathan. Aunt Marni.” Pavi hugged the two of them. Luigi sighed and walked off.
“We need to talk.” The four of them were sitting in the living room around Nathan and Marni. “The verdict has been reached. Your father…he won’t be able to take care of you. So you’ll be staying with us for awhile. We’ll be your guardians until the appeal comes through. We’ll sign the papers in the morning.”
“No.”
“We’re not related Luigi. It will be the only way you can stay here. Or they will put you into the system.”
“What do you mean papa can’t take care of us. I want to go home. I want to stay with mama and papa.”
“Pavi…your mama is dead.”
“What? No…No she’s not. She’s just gone for a vacation. That’s all.”
“What…what does dead mean?” Carmela asked quietly.
“It means she’s gone and she’s not fucking coming back.”
“Luigi. Language.”
“Why? You’re not my fucking mother. Don’t tell me what to do.” He headed towards the door.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to find dad.”
“The court has taken away custody Luigi. They find you with him, they could put him in jail. At the very least, they will take away visitation rights. Give it a few months for things to settle down and for your father to appeal the case.”
“So what happened to mama?”
Nathan sighed. “She…she had an accident. She fell and hurt herself very badly.”
“Yea fell right onto a noose.” Luigi muttered.
“So, when is she coming back?”
“She’s…she’s not coming back.”
“Why? Did we do something wrong?”
“It’s not like that.”
“I promise I’ll be good.”
“Carmela, sometimes…sometimes people die. Sometimes there’s no reason for it. It…it just happens.”
“I don’t…I don’t understand.”
Luigi finally walked up to her and grabbed the doll in her hand. Mommy gave it to her the day after everything that happened in Hill House, hoping to comfort her. Luigi threw it to the ground and stomped on it until it shattered. “Dead. Destroyed. Broken beyond repair. Nothing anyone can do about it except throw it away.”
Carmela started crying.
“Luigi, apologize to your sister.”
“You should have told them from the start. Not dragging things out like this.”
“We thought it was best if your father explained things.”
Pavi was hugging Carmela, comforting her.
“When’s the funeral?”
“The police released her body. We should be able to settles things in a couple of days.”
“Will papa be there?”
“Yes. Yes he will.”
***
Luigi felt hollow. He stared as they lowered the coffin into the ground. Marni fell to her knees sobbing as Nathan held her, tears falling from his eyes as well. What did they know of pain? They weren’t fucking related.
He watched everyone give a little speech about Amber. Pops talked about the sweet girl she used to be. That’s all he’d really know about her. But Amber forgave him the easiest. Luigi didn’t know why. She was the one who accepted the Wallace’s the easiest. She was the once raised mostly by them. Their father could mean shit to her and it wouldn’t matter. But then again…she was the one who always believed Nathan’s lies. He’d buy them extra presents for birthday’s and Christmas and say they were from pops. Forget the fact that half the time, he’d forget to call.
Pavi and Shilo talked about their relationship with her. The three of them were inseparable. Shilo and Amber were almost the same age, they went to the same school, same classes. They were close. Pavi didn’t accept Shilo as his sister like Amber had but they were friends at the very least.
Nathan talked about what a bright girl she was. She had the Wallace’s wrapped around her finger. She knew how to get whatever she wanted from them. She knew they felt sorry for her and she milked it any chance she had. He caught her calling Marni ‘mom’ once. He yelled at her to the point of tears. It worked; he never heard her call her ‘mom’ again. Was he…was he wrong? She had the most chance to be normal. She was almost normal. She was normal. Why did she…
Shilo asked him to speak. He felt everyone staring at him, waiting. “No.” She just gave him a tense smile as she asked her coworkers to speak. What could he say? ‘I abandoned her as soon as I turned 18 and could legally get the fuck out of that house.’ He went back for Christmas, birthdays, that was it. He left. Just like pops did. Amber always tried to keep in contact. Pavi never forgave him for it. He never gave him a reason why he left. ‘I went to find pops. He was fucking some married woman and playing happy family with her children. While he abandoned us.’ Family meant shit. So he left and never looked back. Family did nothing but cause pain. Like this open hole in his chest that continued to tear through him.
Pavi approached the hole in the ground. Probably to say goodbye a final time. All Pavi had was Amber especially after he left. They were close. They were always so close. Which was why he never understood why Pavi moved all the way to LA. Why didn’t he just stay here with Amber and the Wallace’s?
A scream of pure terror jolted from his thoughts. Pavi was on the ground, half in the hole the coffin was in, screaming like a madman. He ran there to pull him up. He froze for a second. He watched his sister stare at him from inside the hole, one hand around Pavi’s right wrist. He shook it off and pulled Pavi back.
“Pavi are you alright?” Shilo ran to them.
“The fuck was that?”
“They were-a pulling me in. They were…” He took deep breaths and tried to calm himself down.
“They?”
“Sorella and-a…mama.”
Mama? He didn’t see their mother down… Wait. Why was he indulging him? It was just a hallucination. Just like how he didn’t see his sister.
“Sorella grabbed my right-a wrist and-a mama my left. They were-a both trying to pull-a me in.”
“Enough Pavi, people are staring.”
It was a coincidence. Pavi screamed, half in the hole with the coffin. Of course he’d hallucinate Amber pulling him in. The same wrist was just a coincidence. That was all. A coincidence… Right?
But as the funeral went on, he couldn’t shake the feeling. He had seen Amber too many times now. He never saw mom after her death. Why would he be hallucinating as an adult but now as a child? And…he saw Amber before he knew she was dead. He had a sick feeling the whole day. But it wouldn’t be enough to spark a hallucination could it?
He didn’t know why Amber killed herself. He didn’t know what drove his mother insane those last few days. But…the connection was that house. That fucking house. He needed answers. Maybe…maybe that house could give it to him. If not, at least he’d prove once and for all that there wasn’t anything wrong with that house. Just children with overactive imaginations. Just a mother with an undiagnosed mental illness. And just a delusional old man trying to absolve himself of guilt.
***
“Fucking bastardo took the car and-a left me behind.” Pavi cursed under his breath. Why the hell did he decide to share a rental with his brother? All the guests had finally left and lo and behold, his asshole of a brother was nowhere to be found.
“I can give you a ride to the hotel.”
“Grazie Bella. I need-a to take a long hot shower and get-a drunk at the hotel bar.” Pavi froze.
“What is it, Pavi?”
Something was wrong. “No, it’s-a nothing.” He shook off the feeling. “It’s just I didn’t-a give fratello the hotel key yesterday, he wouldn’t-a have been able to get into the room.”
“He probably went to find a bar or something.”
“Maybe. I just-a have an odd feeling.”
“What’s that? Are you kidding me? I’ll be right there.” Rotti shut the call.
“What is it-a, papa?”
“The rental was a silver Honda Civic right?”
“Si. Why?”
“I just received a call from Mag. She saw a silver Honda Civic heading up to the house.”
Pavi sighed. “Maybe it’s-a his way of-a finding closure.”
“I’m going to go get him.”
“Papa, he needs-a time alone.”
“You don’t understand. None of you understand. Everything you saw in that house as children was real. Luigi is in danger going back.”
“Papa, please. Enough ghost-a nonsense.”
“It’s not nonsense. You don’t get it do you? It keeps calling you back. We escaped. It’s not happy. We’re a half-eaten meal they let go free. They want us back. They got Amber back there. Now they have Luigi.”
“You really are as-a delusional as-a fratello says.”
“Even so, maybe your dad is right. We should go get him. He’s…not exactly been stable the last few days. He…I’m scared he’ll do something stupid.”
Pavi groaned. But Shilo’s words stirred a sick feeling in his gut. “Fine. Let’s go.”
“No. Just lend me a car. I’ll go there myself.”
“It’s a big house. It’ll be faster if all of us look for him.”
“No. I’m not risking the two of you too.”
“No offense-a papa, but if-a fratello is-a really planning to hurt himself, you’re not exactly the right-a person to talk him down.”
“It’s too dangerous.”
“It’s my car. I’m driving. We’re both going. End of story.”
***
The house was dark and dusty. Everything was falling apart like no one had stepped into the place for years. Luigi didn’t know where he was going or what he planned to find here. But he knew where his mother killed herself. And then he found out that Amber killed herself at the same spot as well. If there was any place to start, it would be there.
He refused to look up at the spot. Slowly he climbed the stairs and froze. The red door was open. Strange. That room never opened. They searched for the key everywhere but they never could find it. The room was empty, desolate. He took a breath and entered the room.
“Luigi. We’re having a tea party. Come join us.”
Luigi froze. The room was brightly lit. A table sat in the middle of the room, filled with biscuits and a tea set. And in front of him stood, “Mo…mom?”
The woman smiled warmly at him. She was as radiant as he remembered her. “Come have tea, Luigi.”
“Don’t.”
“Ca..carmela.” There sitting in the chair opposite him was a 7-year-old girl. “Carmela, is that really…” No it couldn’t be. Why would she be 7? “I’m fucking hallucinating again.”
“Luigi, language.” His mother chided him like he was a child again. “Now, come join our tea party, Luigi. It’s no fun just the two of us.”
“Don’t.” The child warned again.
“I’ve missed you, mom.”
“I know. My poor sweet boy. Come, sit down. Tell me how you’ve been.” Slowly he pulled the chair back and sat. She poured the tea for him.
“Don’t drink it!”
Luigi just stared at the cup.
“Drink, Luigi. And everything will be alright.”
“Don’t do it.”
“I read the police reports, mom. I know what’s in the tea.”
“Oh.” She looked disappointed.
“Run, brother!”
He stared at the cup. “I don’t understand why.”
“I knew how dark and cruel the world could be. I wanted to keep my children with me here, forever. Safe.”
“No. That…that I figured. You…you passed me that night with the tea set.”
“Me and your siblings are having a tea party Luigi. Go back to bed.”
“You took both of them with you. You…you even took Shilo. She wasn’t even your child. She was just a bastard pops had. Why…why didn’t you…”
“Invite you to a tea party? You were too old for that. You’d have said no. And Shilo asked if she could join. It would have been rude to say no.”
“If…if you’d asked, I would have joined you. I would have done anything for you. You know that.” She could have told him what was in the tea and told him to drink it and he would have been a good little boy and done it. “You told me to go back to bed. You told me to go to bed while you planned to kill everyone else and yourself. You were delusional enough to think you’d be together in death so…why didn’t you want me?” Luigi sobbed as 20 years of repressed hurt and pain escaped.
“Oh my boy, my sweet boy, it wasn’t like that.” She approached him and stroked his hair gently. “You were always so strong and brave. Not like your siblings. I thought you would be alright out there. I thought I wouldn’t need to protect you from the world.”
“I didn’t count. You didn’t want me. I didn’t count.”
“Oh my boy. My poor boy. I see I was wrong. The world has hurt you so much. I should have asked you to join me too. The world was too cruel even for one as strong as you. Come. I couldn’t protect you then. Let me protect you now. Have some tea Luigi.”
“Brother, don’t.”
“No one can hurt you again. We’ll be together forever. You, me, Carmie. We won’t leave you ever again.”
“Brother, don’t listen to her.”
He looked at his baby sister for a moment then at his mother. “I love you.”
“I love you my son. My poor, poor son.”
He picked up the teacup as his mother grinned at him. He gulped down the tea.
***
“Why do you think I never sold the house? My wife kills herself in there and I keep the bloody thing?”
“I always-a figured you couldn’t-a sell it. Not with the press-a surrounding the house.”
“I wanted to starve it. Keep it weak…I just made it desperate.”
“It’s a house.”
“No. It’s not just a house. 18 months after your mother died, you took a cab by yourself to Hill Manor.”
Pavi froze. “No I didn’t.”
“Yes you did. You were a child who barely even knew the address of our home. How would you even know the address of the summer home we just bought.”
“I…I don’t-a remember.”
“Luckily the cab driver had sense. He saw the state the house was in, turned around and took you to the nearest police station. Marni was hysterical. You running away in the middle of the night. Nathan attributed it to sleepwalking but I knew better.”
“That doesn’t-a make sense.”
“The house wants you. All of you. It had been silent for 20 years. I thought it finally gave up until your sister…”
“Amber killed herself.” Shilo supplied, eyes still on the road.
“Carmela was the most well-adjusted of the three of them. She accepted you and your parents as her family. She barely remembered Angelina. She had a good career. She was…happy. She wouldn’t have killed herself. She had no reason to.”
“So what, the house-a made her sleepwalk there?”
“Remember the voicemail? She was convinced you were in trouble. I checked her phone. She didn’t get Shilo’s voicemail. She may have been the most adjusted but she also saw the most ghosts in that house. She was the only one who understood how dangerous the house was. I think the house convinced her you were in trouble and she had to go find you.”
“Then how did-a she wind-a up hanging herself?”
“I don’t know. But right now the house has your brother. He may not believe in ghosts but…he is the least stable.”
“And whose fault is-a that?” Pavi hissed.
“He’s the oldest. He remembered your mother the most. He’d have felt her loss.”
Pavi shook his head. “You still don’t-a get it do you? He spent-a every birthday and Christmas waiting for-a you to show up. And when they said-a you could visit once a week, he was-a so convinced you would-a make it but you never did. And the appeals…” Pavi shook his head. “He was-a so sure you would succeed. And Nathan tried-a so hard to keep it from us. He called-a me the Thanksgiving 5 years ago, drunk-a out of his mind. ‘Pops never appealed the case. The courts never took away visitation rights.’”
Rotti was quiet. “How long has he known?”
“Since the first so called appeal. He snuck out of-a the house to go to the courts to watch. But-a you never showed up. And when he came home, Nathan told him that-a you tried your best but-a the appeal failed.” Pavi let out a bitter laugh. “He hated that-a Nathan helped lie for you. Then he put it into his-a head that-a Nathan and Marni were the ones who didn’t want-a you to take us from them. So he counted down until he was 18. He left-a on his birthday to look-a for you. No one knew what-a happened to him for-a almost 6 months when you finally made your yearly Christmas call and fratello was-a not with you. Nathan and-a Marni were worried sick. But-a he was-a over 18. The cops couldn’t-a call it a missing case or a runaway. They found-a him on the streets barely able to feed himself. They paid-a for college and told him you paid and insisted he go.” Pavi took a shuddering breath. “You see; I gave up a long time ago of-a you ever being in our lives. It came to a point where I’d even forgotten what-a you looked like. But fratello…fratello thinks the fucking world of-a you, no matter how many times-a you disappoint him.”
“When did he-”
“Finally give up? After I fucking OD’d.”
“I…I’d accidentally walked in on him. He left dozens of messages begging you to come back. That he was scared and that he needed you.”
“But you never did. Did-a you even know or cared that I nearly died?”
“I…Nathan said you were fine. That you’d survive.”
Pavi gave a hollow laugh. “So you didn’t-a need to come see me did you?” He shook his head. “Nathan paid for rehab. Fratello left his-a job in LA and stayed with-a me until I got clean. And-a I feel so sorry for-a Nathan. Because it was-a so much easier for fratello to hate him than-a hate you. Even though Nathan has-a been a better father to him, to all of us than-a you ever been. But fratello blamed Nathan even though all he ever did was-a cover for you. Even after you fucked his wife.”
Shilo looked away.
“She wasn’t married to Nathan yet.”
“Oh so that-a made it ok? Fucking her the night before the wedding? She may not-a have been married but you definitely were. You fucked-a Marni while mama was-a pregnant with Amber. I always-a wondered if that-a contributed to mama’s breakdown at the end; finding out about an illegitimate child.”
The car stopped. “We’re here.” Shilo said quickly, unable to look at either of them.
Rotti took a breath. “We find Luigi and get out. No matter what you see, what you hear; don’t follow. Just get out of here.”
Pavi exited the car breathing heavily. Everything he held in for the past 20 years just came spilling out. A part of him felt guilty at what he said. Part of him felt satisfied. He wanted papa to know how much he’d hurt all of them. He looked at the house. Memories of ghosts flooded him, He shook his head. He didn’t believe his father’s delusions. He’d spent too many years convincing himself everything he saw in that house wasn’t real. He wasn’t going to spoil it all now just because his father was going senile.
They stepped through the doors.
“Woah this place is huge.”
“Can we stay here forever, daddy?”
“You have school in the fall.”
“I hate school.”
“Now listen to me. Shilo will be staying with us for the summer. I want all three of you to be nice to her.”
“Are her parents really getting a divorce?”
“Pavi, don’t be rude.”
“Sorry.”
“Come Shilo. Let’s pick a nice room before these two idiots hog them all. I always wanted a sister.”
“Did you see that too?”
“It’s-a just memories Shilo.” Pavi muttered shaking off the visions.
“Memories don’t work that way and you know it.”
“Just-a memories of a better time.” He repeated, even though he himself barely remembered the conversation. Even though he barely remembered what his mother looked or sounded like anymore.
“We need to find Luigi now.”
“We should-a split up.”
“I think I know where he is. If he isn’t there, then we split up to find him.”
“It’ll be faster if-”
“He’ll be there. And I don’t want either of you wandering this house on your own.”
Pavi sighed and followed his father. From the corner of his eyes, he saw the same hallucinations he always had. A predisposition to mental illness Luigi had said. He was right. There was nothing supernatural about this house.
“Can you see them too? Please tell me I’m not the only one.”
“Papa scared us with-a ghost stories.”
“But we wouldn’t imagine the same ghosts in the same place right?” She pointed at the bottom of the stairs where a beautiful face stared at him, marred by the hole in her forehead. “She blew her face off.” She pointed towards the kitchen. “Maid. She has scalds all over her body.” She pointed to the living room. “Young girl.”
“Naked. Slit her wrists.”
“See? We can’t have hallucinated the same ghosts. We just can’t.”
Pavi knew she was right. But if the ghosts were real then…did Amber really not kill herself?
“Oh god. Pavi I know where he’d bringing us. The red room. Where your mother was having the tea party.” The last time they saw their mother before papa dragged them out of the house.
Shilo screamed and jumped back.
“What is it?”
“Nothing. I…I thought I saw Amber hanging up there.” He looked up above the stairs but saw nothing.
“It’s where she hung herself. The both of them.”
Pavi shivered. He didn’t know. Amber couldn’t have known…could she?
They headed up the stairs, the room firmly locked shut. Rotti tried to force the door. “Find something to pry it open.”
“It’s-a always been-a locked papa. No one was-a ever able to find the key.” But they had their tea party here. Meaning the door must have been opened. But…but it’s never been open. No one could ever open it. Did Mama find the key?
Rotti moved towards the stairs searching for something, anything to force the door open.
“Pavi, the door!”
Pavi turned and…the door was wide open. On the other side lay, “Fratello!” He lay on the ground, convulsing. Pavi ran into the room. “Fratello!” He tried to hold his brother down. Luigi seized in his arms. “Fratello, what’s-a wrong with you?”
“Pa…Pavi.” He turned as she picked up the opened bottle of rat poison from the ground. No.
“He needs a hospital.” Rotti turned and the door slammed close. “No!” Rotti slammed himself onto the door but it stayed firmly shut. The room was empty. Nothing they could use to pry the door open. Nothing. They were trapped.
A horrible gurgling sound escaped his brother’s throat. Foam and blood escaped his brother’s lips.
“Keep him on his side. Don’t let him choke on it.”
Pavi obeyed. Luigi just convulsed harder.
“How much did-a he fucking drink?”
“I…I don’t know. Half the bottle’s gone.”
“What can we do? What the fuck can we do?”
“I…I don’t know.”
“Fratello, please.” He froze. A ghostly pair of legs appeared before him. He looked up. “Ma…Mama?”
“Pavi. My sweet boy.” She placed her hands on his cheek and he was no longer in that room. He was sitting in the living room of his childhood.
“Pavi, come play with me.”
“Sorella?”
“Pavi, come play with me.”
“No one wants to play with your dolls Carmie.” Luigi muttered from the couch.
“Shilo will play with me.”
“Shilo isn’t here.”
“No but soon. Soon we shall all be together again.” Mama said in a warm voice that made him want to forget everything.
No. Pavi was forgetting something important. He was forgetting something. Something he had to do.
“Pavi.”
“Mama?”
“Oh I missed you my beautiful boy.”
“Mama, why did you leave us?”
“Your father took you from me. We can stay here forever, Pavi. You, me, your brother and your sister.”
Brother. He had to remember something about his brother. Luigi.
“Your father and Shilo as well if they want to.”
“Fratello…”
“Your brother is here with us, look.” Luigi sat on the couch watching the tv. But something felt wrong. It was like he wasn’t really there. Like he was looking at a projection.
“Fratello is…fratello is-a hurt.”
“Your brother is quite alright. It’s taking him a bit of time to come here, that’s all. Soon. Soon he’ll be here.”
“Mama, you don’t-a want to do this. The house is-a making you do this.”
“No. The house opened my eyes to the truth. The only way I could keep you safe, keep all of you safe, is to keep you here forever.”
“Safe? Sorella is-a dead.”
“She’s right here and safe with me. So will your brother.”
“No.”
“You don’t want to be alone do you?”
“No.”
“Come Pavi. You will never be alone again. You will never be abandoned again.”
“Mama.”
“Come to me my sweet boy. Just one more dose of poison in your veins. No one will hurt you again. You won’t hurt yourself again.”
A syringe and needle appeared in his hands. Another overdose?
“Paviche? You’re awake.”
“What-a happened, fratello?”
“You fucking OD’d is what happened. Amber said it was just parties. How the fuck did you end up like this?”
“A good party?”
“Don’t fucking bullshit me!”
“What does it-a matter? I’m-a fine. Go back to LA and do whatever shit you’ve-a been doing.”
“Your heart stopped. It stopped beating for 5 fucking minutes. And I wasn’t here. Fuck. I wasn’t here. All I heard was Amber crying, no one knowing if you were alive or dead. And when I get here no one knowns if you would fucking survive. How could you do that? After everything we’ve been through, how could you do that?”
“I just-a took too much that’s-a all.”
“Fuck you.”
“I’m-a fine.”
“Until the next time you take too much?”
“I won’t.”
“You have to stop.”
“It-a was an accident.”
“I can’t get a call like that again. I can’t…”
“You were-a fucking fine going to LA by yourself and-a leaving us behind. Continue on there. You don’t-a have to give a fuck what happens here. Visiting hours are over.”
“I’m sorry.” Luigi refused to look at him. “I know I fucked up. I’m sorry.”
“I didn’t…I didn’t mean…It really is-a just parties. I just-a fell in with the wrong crowd. It’s-a not a cry for help or-a whatever you want to spin it.”
“I’m begging you to stop. Nathan has agreed to pay for rehab. I…I don’t make half as much.”
“I don’t-a need rehab. I don’t-a want to stop. I’ll cut-a down on the parties, I swear.”
“I’ll come back. I’ll quit my job and move back home.”
“Really, fratello?”
“But only if you stop. I won’t stay here and watch you kill yourself.”
“How-a long will you stay for?”
“As long as you want me here. I won’t abandon you again.”
Liar. That fucking liar. They were all fucking liars. They were leaving him one by one. Why should he have listened?
“Brother, please don’t do this.” Carmela still sat on the living room floor playing with her dolls ignoring them but…Amber stood next to him.
“Sorella.”
“Please don’t do this. Don’t listen to her.”
“You left-a. You killed yourself and-a you abandoned us.”
“I didn’t kill myself. She killed me. I didn’t want to die.”
He turned and he was on top of the staircase outside the red room. He watched his mother put the noose around Amber’s neck but she didn’t notice. “It’s a beautiful necklace mommy.” She led her over the edge and she stood tethering. She blinked and looked down. “No.” She gripped the banister. “Mommy help me.”
“Come join me my baby.”
“I don’t want to die.”
“Come my little one. My beautiful little girl.”
“Mommy please.”
“I love you.” Mama pushed Amber off the ledge. Her scream was cut short by a firm breaking.
Pavi stumbled back and he was once more in the living room. “You killed her. She didn’t-a want to die. You killed her.”
“I was saving her. Before the world could ruin her. I saved her. Before the world could turn her into your brother. I didn’t even need to convince him.”
“You did that to him. You and-a papa and killing sorella. You did that-a to him. Not the world. If-a you have any shred of decency left-a in you, if any of our mother is still-a in there, you’d-a let me save him.”
“He doesn’t want to be saved.”
“All-a we have is each other. Please, let-a him go.”
“He left you. After you got cleaned as he asked, he left you and went back to LA.”
“And I followed. Because I knew he didn’t-a want to be alone. But he couldn’t be in that-a city anymore. Not with-a papa there. So he could-a fool himself into believing he left-a papa. Not-a the other way around. Not papa refusing to see him, to see us. I can-a beg him to stay. He will-a stay with me. I know it. Please mama. Don’t-a take him too.”
“I don’t want to be alone anymore.”
“I’m here mommy. I’m here. You’re not alone, you have me.”
“If you die outside, I will never see you again. If you bring Luigi out of here and he dies in a hospital, I will never see him again. You can’t take him from me. You can’t. Stay here. All of you. We can be a family again. Just as we were all those years ago.”
“But that’s not me mommy.” Amber pointed at the little girl still playing with her dolls. “it hasn’t been me for a long time. Even with me here, you still want what we were, not what we are now. That isn’t love.”
“You called your brother here, not me.”
“This house called him here, not me. This house is making you hurt us, not you. This isn’t you, mommy. You’re letting this house kill us one by one. But you can stop this. I’m here. Not that memory. Me. I won’t leave you alone. Just let them live, please.”
“No.” Her face turned cruel. “No. I will keep you here with me. All of you.” A smile appeared on her face; warm but twisted. “Oh, your brother’s coming. I hope he still likes tea.”
Ice filled him. “No.”
“Go. Pavi, go.” Amber placed two fingers on his forehead.
***
Pavi jerked awake. He was back in the room. Shilo and Papa were passed out on the floor. “Fratello!” Luigi was still. “No. NO. NO. Nononono.” He placed a hand on his neck. “No.” There was no pulse.
He pulled his brother onto his back and started CPR. He just needed to get his heart started again. He needed to start his heart. “Fratello, please don’t-a leave me.”
“Pavi?” Shilo woke. Of course mama couldn’t convince her to stay.
“Get the door open.”
“Is he-”
“Get the fucking door open!”
“Oh god.”
“Fratello, don’t you fucking dare abandon me again.” 30 and 2 breaths. 30 and 2 breaths. But he couldn’t count. He couldn’t. Not with his shaking and his fear. And… 30 and 2 breaths. “Fratello please.”
***
“Fratello please.”
Luigi glanced up for a minute. His brow furrowed. He shook his head and took another biscuit from the table.
“Can’t you hear him?”
“Fratello, I won’t fucking forgive you. Please.”
“Ignore the voice, Carmela. There’s no such thing as ghosts.”
“You’re leaving him alone?”
“He’s not alone. He has-”
“He has no one else!” She slammed her fist on the table. It was always comical coming from such a small child if not for the anger on her face. “Can’t you hear his heart breaking? Go back Luigi, please. Don’t leave him.”
“Like you left us?”
“I didn’t kill myself. I didn’t want to die. I had so much going for me. I was happy. I didn’t want to die.”
Luigi froze, a chill ran up his spine. “You’re lying.” His voice was little more than a whisper.
“No. When she couldn’t convince me to stay, mommy pushed me.”
“You…you kept coming to find me.”
“I heard your heart breaking. Just like I hear Pavi’s heart breaking now. I wanted to tell you it wasn’t your fault. You couldn’t have known because I didn’t kill myself. I didn’t want this.” She shook her head. “But I couldn’t speak, couldn’t say anything. I could see you, all of you. But I kept shouting and screaming but none of you could hear me. I saw all of you blame yourselves for what happened. But it wasn’t anyone’s fault. The house tricked me and brought me here. Mommy tricked me into hanging myself. She pushed me. It’s this house brother. It’s no one else’s fault. Just like how mommy’s death wasn’t anyone’s fault. Not yours. Not daddy’s. It’s this house.”
“If I hadn’t gone to LA-”
“Shi was here. Nathan and Marni were here. Daddy was here. It didn’t matter. You couldn’t have stopped it even if you were here.”
“I should have believed you about the house.”
“You should have. But it wouldn’t have made a fucking difference.”
“Language.”
“I’m not a child!” And as soon as she said that, she aged into the woman she was before she died.
“Amber.” Luigi choked. He trembled as he walked up to her and clutched her. “I’m sorry.”
“Did you not hear a word I said?”
“I’ve missed you.”
“I miss you too brother. But you cannot stay.”
“I can’t do this without you.”
“You can and you will. We will see each other again brother, I know it. Just not now. Not like this. Go back to him please.”
Luigi closed his eyes. “How?”
“Destroy the cup. You drank the poison. You have to choose to leave.”
He nodded slowly. He raised the cup above him.
“Luigi, don’t do this.”
“Mom.”
“Don’t leave me.”
Slowly, Luigi lowered the cup, staring at her.
“Luigi, don’t listen to her.”
“I don’t want to be alone again.”
“She has me, brother. The house is manipulating you.”
“Luigi, I’m so lonely. I’ve been alone in this house for 20 years.”
“Brother she has me.”
“Drink another cup, Luigi. Stay here with me.”
An animalistic how of pain echoed through the room.
“Listen to him, brother. You’ll kill him.”
“He can join us too. We’ll be a family again. All of us.”
“Pavi already refused. He doesn’t want this, brother. Don’t force him to do this.”
“Luigi-”
“Enough!” Luigi shook. “Both of you just…enough.” He stared at the cup in his hand. “I…I love you both so much.”
“I love you too brother. I will always be with you.”
“Luigi, don’t.”
Luigi’s eyes never left the cup. “For so many years, I wondered why you never invited me to that fucking tea party. I’d gotten it into my head it must have meant you didn’t love me. I see now, you are not you.” He finally looked at his mother. “You are just a vessel this house uses to get more victims. You were right.” He took a breath. “I was too old for the tea party. I would have figured something was wrong and stopped you or called dad or made a scene. Sending me to bed was to keep me out of the way. I see that now. I finally see that.” His eyes burned. “My mother was a wonderful woman. She was beautiful and kind and forgiving and she would have done anything for us. She was not the kind of person who could murder her own daughter, no matter how lonely she felt. I don’t know if you’re still in there, mom, but I love you and miss you so much. It’s not that I don’t want to be with you. But I’ve abandoned Pavi too many times now, convinced that if you didn’t love me, no one else ever did. So I did all I could to push everyone away, keep my heart safe. I can’t do that to him again. I’m sorry.” He closed his eyes and smashed to cup against the ground.
***
Shilo grabbed his hands. “Pavi…Pavi enough. He’s gone.” She choked.
“No.”
“He’s gone.”
A broken cry of grief escaped Pavi’s lips. He’d just lost his sister…he couldn’t…he couldn’t… He curled against himself, head pressed into his hands. Painful sobs escaped his lips. No. “You bastard.” He choked out. “You fucking-”
Luigi gasped.
“Fra…fratello?”
Luigi coughed and gagged as more blood escaped his lips. But he was breathing. He was breathing.
“Fratello.” He felt his pulse. It was weak and thready. “He needs a hospital.”
“The door is still locked.”
“Mama, please. Please.”
“You want someone, Angelina, take me.”
“Pa…papa?”
His father stood quietly, staring at the empty spot below the window. “Let them go Angelina. Take me.”
“Pops, don’t.” Luigi choked out.
“I kept making screw up after screw up. Everything that I thought I was doing that was right just made things worse. Let me fix this. If you want someone, Angelina, take me. Let the boy live.”
“Look at him Rotti.” Came a disembodied voice. Slowly, his mother appeared translucent at the spot his father was staring at. “Look at what the world has done to him. I can keep him safe.”
“What we’ve done to him, Angelina.”
“No. I want to protect him.”
“You’re taking the rest of his life from him.”
“I’m protecting him.”
“No, you’re not. That’s not being a parent. You have to let them go and screw up and learn to survive the world. That’s living.”
“I don’t want to be alone.”
“I will stay with you. Just open the door.”
“Pops, please.”
Her features turned cold. “Or I can keep all of you here with me.”
“Look at him, Angelina. He’s suffering.”
She looked sadly at him, “It will end soon. I promise.” She gave him a warm reassuring smile.
“Do you remember when Luigi was born? What hope we had for him, for his future? You’re taking everything away from him. You have to let him live. Please, let him go.”
Her eyes softened and he swore he could see his mother fighting to break through. Tears leaked from her eyes. She nodded. The door swung open.
Rotti bent next to Luigi. He grabbed his wrist. “Pops, don’t do this.” He gasped out weakly.
“I’m sorry. I never realized how much I hurt you, hurt all of you. I thought you could have a normal life, a normal family with the Wallace’s. I didn’t want to ruin that.”
“I didn’t want them, pops. I wanted you.”
“I see that now. I’m sorry.”
“Pops, please. Don’t do this.”
Rotti placed a gentle hand on his face. “I want this. 20 years ago, if it wasn’t for you three, I would have hung myself right next to her. I loved her so much. And I grieved
Yo any artists in the repo fandom who wanna do Aggie.Io with me? It’s a website where you can draw with other people! I’d love to draw repo stuff with someone!
(Welcome! to my ramblings as I think about the intricacies of Repo! The Genetic Opera.)
So! Rotti Largo is such an interesting character to me because he’s not as clear cut as he appears to be? From a singular glance, he’s just a clear cut villain character with no real purpose or motivation other than, you know, being evil. But I have to admit, the more I think about it the more I find that he does, in some strange way, have some redeeming qualities.
I know, ‘Rotti? Redeeming qualities?’ JUST HEAR ME OUT. Rotti Largo is this super powerful politician type who can literally kill people whenever he wants. It’s honestly kind of scary. But there are things about him that make me question if there is truly, even a sliver of good inside of this man.
First thing is his children. He hates them, right? But he has also shown to care about them just a tad. He hates them for being creations of his own doing, as all of their behaviors are just byproducts of the society that he created, but he clearly doesn’t hate them that much. My evidence for that? Two things. 1.) He could have easily killed them if he wanted to. If he truly hated them that much, he could have gotten rid of them. But something somewhere cares for them, and that has to count for something. 2.) Amber. She’s a big deal in this whole point, given that he has stated himself that all he has ever tried to do is give the kids the life that he wished he had growing up. Which, in and of itself is sweet in retrospect, but it did end up turning the children into exactly what he despises about them. Furthermore, I have to believe that Rotti chose Amber as the backup heir for geneco, despite how ill suited for it he initially thought. If the company was just inherited by blood, Luigi would have inherited geneco, as he is the oldest child. Instead, it went to the youngest, meaning that Rotti must have specified at some point that if his plan to have Shilo as his heir for geneco fell through, Amber would be the next in line.
Which brings me to my next point, which is the entire thing with Shilo. While kind of messed up, Rotti did end up getting Shilo her cure by revealing that her father had been the one poisoning her. And it is also inferred that he did truly want to give her geneco, and that Nathan dying was not originally part of his plan and only came into the picture once he refused to kill Mag. I think perhaps that not only did he want Shilo because she was responsible and respectable unlike Luigi, Pavi, and Amber, but because he may have felt bad for killing Marni, someone who he had truly loved, and seeing as Shilo is her daughter, it may have been in some crooked twisted way, an apology.
This brings me to my final point: Geneco as a whole. Yes, the whole organ repossession thing is fucked up, but the fact that they are making these organs to save people from death is a good thing, even if they will be murdered upon missing a payment.
Am I saying that Rotti is a good man? Absolutely not. But, I do think he is much more interesting the more you think about him, and It’s interesting how the character who is shown as ‘bad’ occasionally actually does good things, where as the character who is shown as (and I say this loosely) ‘good’ aka Nathan, is shown doing horrendous things, and yet the audience is made to feel sorry for him.
I still do not like him, but it is certainly food for thought!
