#submitting while having negative feels

Daily Picture Assignment #24

On Friday, I woke up feeling kind of grumpy. Grumpy in general and grumpy at Reaction Junkie. It was mostly the result of not sleeping long enough or well enough, but also because something he’d said to me when I woke up in the middle of the night gave me a moderate case of the feels.

When I was trying to decide what to wear to work that day, one of my previous DPA posts came to mind. I considered wearing something besides my usual, but because I was grumpy, I initially pushed the idea aside.

Then I realized that this was a perfect opportunity. I should put forth that extra effort, not despite being grumpy with him, but because of it. Deciding to pick an outfit with Reaction Junkie in mind despite not being in the mood is an even better demonstration of my submission than if I were excited about doing it.

So, I put on a cute skirt and heels, and headed out to the office, pleased with myself for being good, even though I hadn’t felt like it.

Daily Picture Assignment #148

Outfit inspired by the instruction “Boots and Cats.”

The fourth reason it’s important to follow orders is that it helps me to be better in the future. Following an order now lays the groundwork for me to follow the next order just a bit more instinctively. It teaches me to push past any reticence or annoyance and do as I’m told.

Obedience, especially obedience in times of stress or distraction, isn’t something that comes naturally to me. I need to practice it. Following simple and easy instructions, like “get me a glass of water,” helps me to exercise those mental muscles that will serve me will in the future when I get more difficult instructions or when I’m in a mental place that isn’t conducive to obedience.