#sydney bristow
Too much energy!
Sydney : How are you?
Irina : I’m feeling stabby.
Sydney : Oh oka-… wait, someone stabbed you?
Irina : I can’t feel stabby? This is what life is now? I cAN’T FEEL WHAT I WANT TO FEEL?! WHAT IF I WANT TO FEEL STABBY?!
Sydney :
Irina :
Sydney :
Irina : I’m bleeding out.
Irina : They… well, I wouldn’t call it inheritance per se. What do you call it when you kill someone and get their stuff?
Sydney : Um, murder??
Jack :Adventuring!
Sloane :Tuesday.
Sydney: *about Irina* She’s covered in blood again! Why is she’s always covered in blood?
Jack : Well, it looks like it’s her own blood this time.
Irina : I don’t need a bomb to burst stuff down, Sydney. All I need is these two hands and a lack of supervision.
Sydney : So apparently all the bad vibes I’ve been feeling are actually what’s called “severe psychological distress”.
Jack, to Sydney: We’re fine! We’re all fine!
Jack : *whispering* Nadia, go revive Vaughn.
Sydney : Dad, you were right. You were right about everything.
Jack : I know, but you’ll have to be more specific.
Sloane : My orders aren’t mere suggestions, Sydney! You’re supposed to follow them!
Sydney : Wait, what do you mean they aren’t suggestions?
Sark : Did you even listen to a single word I said?
Sydney : In my defense, I listened to about five of them and that’s a new record for me
Sydney : Don’t break someone’s heart, they only got one
Irina : Yeah, break their bones
Irina : They have like 270 of them
*Sydney and Sark working together in a mission in season 2*
Sark : Punch me in the face.
Sydney :What?
Sark : Didn’t you hear me? Punch me in the face!
Sydney : I always hear “punch me in the face” when you talk, but it’s usually subtext.
Sydney: *texting* Dad, you don’t have to sign your name in text messages.
Jack : *texting back* Dear Sydney. Suggestion noted. Sincerily, your dad, Jack Bristow.
Jack : Are you okay?
Sydney :Yes.
Jack : Are you hurt?
Sydney :No.
Jack : THEN WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, KNUCKLEHEAD!?
Irina : *Pulls up to the drive-thru*
Irina : I’ll have 3 cheeseburgers-
Jack : Irina! Sydney is in labor!
Irina : *Looks at Sydney in the backseat*
Irina : And a kids meal.
Sark : Don’t go picking a fight with me. I could make your life difficult.
Sydney : *sarcastically* Wow. I wonder what it’d be like to have a difficult life.
Sydney : I’m pretty easygoing.
Nadia : Once I saw you measure a ruler with another ruler.
Sydney : It was off by half a centimeter. It never should have been in circulation!
Sydney: Look, let me just walk you through a hypothetical. Can I walk you through a hypothetical?
Jack: What did you do?
Sydney: I didn’t do anything-
Irina: *freshly broken out of prison* Hello!
Jack : Sydney, we will be having a chat with one of my contact.
Sydney : Just so we’re clear, is this a “chat” chat, or a “shovel in the trunk” kind of chat?
Jack : … Get the shovel.
Jack to Sydney : First rule to survive a zombie apocalypse : Don’t ever let them know where you are.
Irina : *yelling* I’m right here! You want some of this?! *start shooting everywhere*
Jack : Of course, there are other schools of thought.
