#the gathering storm

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(The Gathering Storm spoilers below)


In a modern AU Sheriam is a reasonably successful multi-level-marketing product vendor with a big downline.

She was sort of uncomfortable with recruiting a bunch of sellers under her but tells herself that she’s still just doing this to be a successful small business owner. It’s not her fault she has to recruit more and more people under her to make real money. It’s just how the system works.

Anyway, better them than her!

The Gathering Storm, Chapter 3

In my defense, I had to do five 30-minute shifts of carts in 90 degrees (Fahrenheit) heat. We got cold water and gatorade, but it was still exhausting. But enough about that, more actual story! Y’hear that, Greg? An actual story!!!

(Oh and if you are tired of me harping on about Greg Weisman, you can vent your frustration by voting for an icon that I have to keep ‘til the next main set! Pupper looks like he’s winning for now…)

  • Ooh, I think this is the meeting where Vraska straight-up murders Isperia!
  • Well of course there are guards everywhere – if all the guilds are called to a meeting, a fight’s bound to break out.
  • Ah, there are Baan’s thopters! Wonder if after War of the Spark the Azorius ceased using them. Probably, all things considered.
    • OH FUCK I JUST REALIZED.
      Dovin Baan got blinded in War of the Spark: Ravnica.
      He’s immune to Vraska’s petrification – he can’t see her!
    • I thought this’d be poetic justice for Vraska, but now it looks like she got the short end of the stick…
  • Spiked fences? I mean it does fit with the the whole uncaring government appeal, but you just know that at least 15 Raakdos cultists have impaled someone on ‘em.
  • “All non-guildmembers must have their papers processed before entry,” the sergeant said. “Please wait your turn.”
    • Isn’t Hekara an emissary? Isn’t Ral an emissary? Shouldn’t the process be expedited for them? Do you really want Rakdos himself to show up in New Prahv?
  • Why is it so quiet in New Prahv? Do they fine their own guildmembers for noise violations?
  • The homunculi here are described as ‘wizened’. Just how old can homunculi get?
    • I should really stop asking so many questions.
  • Angry noises. “Ah, I see the Boros are here.”
  • I’d think that the Azorius would prefer round tables for this sort of thing, given how it features prominently in their logo, but I’m just an artist what do I know.
  • Okay, so the lieutenant is letting her subordinates do all the arguing, but her boss is “Against the rear wall”. Implying that Aurelia is just leaning against the wall and just watching all this go down, and it’s hilarious.
  • Aurelia’s features are described as androgynous.
  • Of course not,“ the vedalken shot back. "We are the law.”

(Side note I am super upset that someone beat me to the punch on that joke, but Django deserves it.)

  • Aurelia actually makes a good point. Someone may not be able to sue the government, but that doesn’t mean justice can’t be delivered against said government. Topical!
  • Oh hey, I just noticed: the Jeskai-colored guilds are all together!
  • If Isperia could foresee things like sphinxes sometimes do, it was probably a good idea to only have the representatives enter. Otherwise the guild subordinates would turn upon one another quicker than you can say “petrify”.
  • Him? Is this vedalken Dovin Baan? If so he may have orchestrated only the guild officials having the conference…
    • CALLED IT!!!
  • Oh you bet your bottom dollar that he knows something about these recent matters!
  • Kudos to Isperia for connecting other worlds to Azor.
  • "At the same time, we have grown used to ignoring his … flights of fancy.” – Guildmaster “I will roast you within the bounds of the Law” Isperia

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • You know this is the worst she can legally say about the Azorius parun! Hot damn – from the Azorius no less! Nominated for Best Owns and Burns!
  • “I assure you planeswalkers exist,” said Ral Zarek, a planeswalker.
  • Immediately Aurelia is saying her guild alone could take on Bolas. Classic Boros.
  • "At least some Ravnicans,” Ral said. “We know that Lazav and the Dimir are working with him.”
    • And here we see Bolas’ dominoes start to fall…
  • Mmm, I love a good “Jace is supposed to be the Guildpact” roast. I’m gonna miss that now…
  • “Getting agreement will not be easy,” Aurelia said. “The Gruul will object on principle, and the Orzhov will consider only their own private advantage.”  
    • More dominoes falling. Now we know why Bolas chose Domri, and why Kaya is on her mission.
  • Ral Zarek has to convince all the guilds to come to the summit. What could go wrong? No seriously, Bolas has this set up so perfectly, is there any way this can go wrong?
  • There’s a market in Azorius territory? God, that must be awful to work there… but then again they’d seem like the type to have their own coffee shops in-house.
  • We need more faeries in magic. Give us a faerie planeswalker!
  • This girl can’t be Rat: Ral can see her, and Django isn’t Greg Weisman.
  • I like how Ral can sense lightning in clouds like Nissa can sense leylines. They’re so connected to their thing that they can sense it far away.
  • Aha! Lavinia! She’s not exiled yet, so she’s still okay to be here.
  • Good ol’ Lavinia. She should have her own detective series. I’d pay good money for that*.
    • *as long as it’s not by Greg Weisman.
  • And here’s more dominoes! They aren’t going to stop Ral from opposing Bolas, because Ral’s plan is exactly what Bolas wants!
  • I wonder if ‘Lavinia’ is Lazav…
  • I mean yeah, he was a born schemer. I’m guessing you just assume that, Ral. But it is obvious.
  • I feel this hard. I want to help people, but I need to be somewhere else.
  • Oh? An apartment? ARE WE GONNA SEE RAL AND TOMIK BEING A COUPLE???
  • WE GET TO SEE RAL AND TOMIK BEING A GAY COUPLE!!! THANK YOU DJANGO WEXLER!!!
  • Tomik stepped forward, and Ral leaned in and kissed him thoroughly. Finally Tomik broke away, shoved past Ral in spite of his mock complaints, and headed straight for the table.

    "Something wrong?” Ral said, after some hesitation.
    “Oh.” Tomik laid down his fork and looked up. “You know. Guild business.”
    “Guild business.” They said it almost simultaneously, and Tomik smiled a little.

    Tomik’s quick mind (and the way he fiddled with his glasses when he was flustered) had intrigued Ral, and he had taken the unusual step of suggesting they meet privately once the negotiations had concluded. After that, one thing had somehow led to another.
    • As someone who’s planning on moving in with his boyfriend that his Catholic mother doesn’t know about, this makes me so inconceivably happy seeing this, seeing these lovely little interactions between people like me. Just thank you, thank you so much for writing this, Django!
  • They’re spooning!!!
  • I wonder how outskirts work on an ecumenopolis.
  • Somnolence means sleepiness.
  • Magesare expensive. All those material components, not even including pricier gem spells…
  • Oh shit, backstory. Ral’s mom was injured in a cloth factory. This is 1800′s levels of factory unsafety here…
    • And his father was a drunk. Just… Ral needs a hug.
  • So Ral was with Elias, an artist.
  • A minor nitpicky note, I wonder how the word ‘bohemian’ came to be in Ravnica? Some guy named Bohemia?
  • This is actually a good point. Rain mage is seen as mocking here: Ral only ever refers to himself as a storm mage.
  • Let’s also take an aside to say “f*ck you” to all bullying rich kids.
  • “Here.” The man handed him a handkerchief. “You might want to clean yourself up a bit. You look like you’ve been in the wars.”
    • Curious line. I’m assuming he means interguild conflict in general, unless (given it’s in a vaguely foreign style) he’s a planeswalker too.
  • “Excellent,” the stranger said. “Then we have much to discuss.”
    He extended a hand, and Ral shook it.
    “Ral Zarek,” Ral said.
    “Bolas,” the stranger said. He grinned, his smile showing very white, slightly pointed teeth. “Nicol Bolas.”

    • OH F–

That was a lot to take in! From more pieces falling into place, to seeing Tomik and Ral be a couple, to Ral’s early life in Victorian EnglandRavnica,to that f*cking twist at the end! Bolas really does take talent scouting to the next level…

We got New Prahv! Thopters! Fences! Bureaucracy! Boros-Azorius conflict! Androgynous angels! Dovin Baan cameo! Jeskai colors! Roasting Azor! Planeswalkers! Distrusting the Dimir! Pieces falling into place! Faeries! Lavinia? Puppet shows! Buying dinner for your boyfriend! Eating dinner with your boyfriend! Spooning with your boyfriend! Industrial Era factories! Poet lovers! Being so pretentious that you have a mage water your crops! Rich bullies! NICOL F*CKING BOLAS!!!

But when will the next Announcement Day be??? Stay tuned!

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