#the purse

“THE” Purse

December 25, 2015. That was the day I got “THE” purse.  

Three years ago I was a very different person. I was in my third year of university but my first semester in the business faculty. To say I was lost and confused would be a vast understatement. I had no idea if I was making the right choice switching to business after being in the science faculty as well as the education faculty. My confidence in myself and my intelligence was at an all-time low, but I was determined to make my way through my degree one day at a time. 

That year there was thing I wanted to buy and one thing only. I wanted a big girl purse. Being a girl obsessed with all things fashion and beauty, I had an abundance of purses throughout my life but none of them symbolized an “adult” purse to me. They were all casual or little cross-body purses. I wanted a handbag that would make me look like I meant business. One that would turn my babyface into a girl boss. One that I could carry on the crook of my arm that would one day hold very important documents and files. Because at the time, that was something I thought every businesswoman had and needed. 

In the winter of 2015, I was dating a boy named Brent. I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned his name on ze blog before but as one of my first boyfriends, he is automatically special, so he deserves a name here. That year for Christmas he got me a gift that to anyone else would just be a pretty purse but to me, it was so damn special. This Michael Kors Selma handbag is so much more than a purse. When Brent handed it to me on December 25, 2015, he told me that the reason he bought such an expensive, designer purse was so that everytime I carried it, I would have the confidence to be a powerful businesswoman and I would remember that I have the ambition and drive to be anything I wanted to be. And so, I didn’t like the purse because it was pretty. I didn’t like it because it was expensive. I didn’t like it because it was Michael Kors. I loved it because of what it symbolized. And nothing is more special than that. 

Ever since that day, I held those words and the purse very close to my heart. It was the purse I wore to every business presentation in university. It was the purse I took to my first business conference. It was the purse I was carrying when I got the YouAlberta blogging contract. It was the purse I used when I wrote my last final of my undergrad degree. It was the purse I carried when I went to a meeting for my first high-paying blog sponsorship.

But it was also the purse I used when I went to countless interviews and got told I didn’t have enough experience. It was the purse I was carrying when I felt absolutely worthless and like I would never achieve my goals. But time and time again, I would look at that purse and remember my ex-boyfriend’s words. It helped me remember that somebody actually believed I would accomplish something in my life. 

And then, it became the purse that I carried when I got my first adult job after university. It also became the purse that accompanied me when I quit that first adult job. And, it became the purse I carried when tears of happiness streamed down my face because I got the job at my dream company. This purse has become a token for not only the struggles I have faced in my life but also the things that I have achieved. Throughout these past three years with this purse by my side (literally), I graduated university, grew this blog to a level I never could have dreamed of and made my way through the business world.

So to anyone else this is just a purse. But to me, this is my future. These are my goals. And this purse is going to be with me every step of the way.