mentallyfrill:

autismus-obscurus:

redacted-metallum:

• “You don’t seemautistic”
• (after relearning/learning how to stim) “What are you doing?  Stop that”
• Internally: “Oh shit that wasn’t a temper tantrum, that was a meltdown because my comfort object was literally taken from my hands”
• Obsessed with That One Thing that you can’t shut up about
• Being deeply and personally offended by Sheldon Cooper
• Asking your friends to tell you to shut up when they get bored because you Can’t Tell
• I could wear these pants yesterday, but today they feel like they’re made of Sandpaper, so I Can’t
• *cuts every tag off of every piece of clothing ever*
• *sees self in every autistic coded character* weird
• Watches stim videos for 4 hours like ????? why good
• *chews on something* why
• Literally eats the same thing for lunch for 11 years without getting bored of it
• I Can’t find the Thing I Need so I’m Panicking Now
• “Look at me when I’m talking to you!”
• Bounce leg bounce leg tap pencil click pen bounce leg
• *gets tested for ADHD*  *inconclusive results*
• *rolls toy truck over face* nice

Feel free to add your own, also this got so much longer than I thought it would be

(bonus round: you’re AFAB)

“Just hug them, what’s wrong with you?”
“Everybody hates me and I don’t know why!” - “Nonsense just try harder and you’ll have friends.”
*is called lazy every day*

• *gets called rude, but isn’t trying to be*
• “You’re too sensitive, we arent even that loud”
• *plans are cancelled/routine is compromised* Time To Cry Wherever You Are
• *gets in trouble for staring off into space, despite listening, just not giving eye contact*
• Hoodie zipper zipping!!!!!! Nail biting!!! Biting inside of cheek!!!!
• “____ is smart but is in their own world and has very few friends”

saltwaterstudy:

ok but my new years resolution is to post more original content!!! like.. I hand write all my notes so why dont i post them??? bc i am… how do you say…. a FOOL

“I know my sweet seductress, and her name is Depression. I wrote best beneath that demon’s destructive oppression.”

Levithepoet - corrispondence - chapter 3

getouttofmyway:

therapist: how are you?

me: fine how are you

sadclowncentral:

sadclowncentral:

sadclowncentral:

yesterday my date made me promise to “not talk to any random russians this time” only for me to immediately become best friends with a kosovan gang member. saved on a technicality

after i successfully taught him how to play uno via google translate i explained to him that my date’s phone got stolen, prompting both the most threatening AND the most hilarious sentence ever typed into a translator:

“why did you have to promise that you won’t talk to russian people in in first place” because after a certain amount of alcohol i enter a stage of inebriation my friends have dubbed “russian hour” in which the duolingo trained part of my brain takes over and i sniff out russian speaking people like a bloodhound and exitedly talk to them until i am physically dragged away.

transbibennyweir:

Ethan: how did you accidentally set a lemon on fire?

Benny: microwave for 40 minutes

Ethan: why were you microwaving a lemon

Benny: I read boiling a lemon helps cover up bad scents and I wanted to cover up the smell of burnt oranges, but I couldn’t find any pots

Ethan: you burnt an orange too? How?

Benny: microwave for 40 minutes

You can burn anything if you microwave it enough, as i discovered the other day

This is 5000 % me -Limpnoodle

emmeetslawschool:

sextronautt:

how can lawyers argue without crying 

This is in fact the final exam of law school. The bar exam is just three days of having to argue about things you care about and prove to the examiners that you can do so without your voice cracking. You get two voice crack chances and then your lawyer card is forever taken away.

stuckinapril:

girl help i am the most sensitive person you can ever meet but also the most emotionally unavailable person you can ever meet at the exact same time and i’m still trying to make it work somehow

kamoi: