#assassins creed
#176
Eivor: I know you think my judgment is a bit clouded because I like Randvi a little bit, but-
Soma: Eivor, you’re doodling your wedding invitations.
Eivor: No, this is our joint tombstones.
Soma: Oh, my mistake.
Source: Brooklyn 99
#175
Randvi: I never thought I could fall in love with everything about a person.
Randvi: Then I met you. And that dumptruck of an ass.
Eivor:
Source: TikTok her_and_me_plus_3
#175
Randvi: I never thought I could fall in love with everything about a person.
Randvi: Then I met you. And that dumptruck of an ass.
Eivor:
Source: TikTok her_and_me_plus_3
#174
Petra: You can’t openly flirt with me and not expect me to catch feelings.
Eivor: I offered you a bottle of water.
Source: Unknown
#173
Valdis: Why would you give Oswald a knife?
Eivor: He was feeling unsafe.
Valdis: Now I feel unsafe!
Eivor: I’m sorry.
Eivor: …Would you like a knife?
Source: Unknown
#172
Hytham: So Aristotle was Plato’s student. And Aristotle believes that your character is voluntary, because it’s just the result of your actions, which are under your control.
Hytham: For example, right now, you have made the insane choice to ignore the person who is literally trying to save you from eternal damnation.
Eivor: No, yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m listening. Uh, I just are we sure we should be paying attention to these guys? It’s like, who died and left Aristotle in charge of ethics?
Hytham: …Plato.
Source: The Good Place
#171
Valka: There’s only one way out of this.
Eivor: [concerned expression]
Valka: Apple slices and story time!
Source: The Owl House
#170
Randvi: Have you noticed anything weird about Ubba?
Sigurd: Other than the fact that he’s not circumcised?
Randvi: Wow. Okay. Glossing over how you know that…
Sigurd: We touched penises…
Randvi: No! Glossing! Glossing!
Source: Archer
#169
Holger: Do you think I could fit fifteen marshmallows into my mouth
Randvi: You’re a hazard to society.
Eivor: And a coward. Do twenty.
Source: Tumblr kyalin-incorrectquotes
#168
Runa: Eivor is terrifying. I wonder what she’s thinking about.
Eivor:Gods, she’s so beautiful. She’s perfect, I love my wife so much- look how amazingly stunning she is, I’m so lucky-
Source: Unknown
#167
Randvi: I will hurt the next person that disrespects Eivor!
Eivor: I’m shit.
Randvi: Eivor, don’t make me come over there and slap you!
Source: Unknown
#166
Eivor: Can we agree not to tell anyone about this?
Valka: This isn’t even the most disappointing thing I know about you.
Source: Texts From Last Night
#165
Randvi: Nice face.
Eivor: Uh… thank you?
Randvi: I bet it’d look even better down between-
Coelbert: THE PAGES OF A BIBLE! AT CHURCH WHERE BIBLES ARE! WHERE GOD WAITS!
Source: Unknown
#164
Sigurd: Fuck you, Eivor!
Eivor: Fuck you, Sigurd! Your life is so fucking pathetic, I ran a charity 15K to raise awareness for it, you fucking loser.
Source: Letterkenny
#163
Randvi: I swear to god, if these people don’t go back to work, and get out of my motherfucking house I’m gonna go nuts.
Source: TikTok user dawgfacegirltoo
#162
Sigurd: You’re really campaigning for Bitch of the Year, aren’t you
Eivor: As defending champion, you nervous?
Source: Unknown
This was an ask response but here is a rebloggable version as requested by rochellelaughingalonewithpills!
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Just a reminder that Sofia Rikkin is the best woman in Assassin’s Creed. You can’t change my mind
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