#aunty tam
Just saw Red Robin losing it on top of them gargoyle statues cuz School is back. He just started screaming (not outta pain, but outta rage?) and some other students that were passing by joined in and started crying? All I gotta say is that I’m glad that I’m not in school anymore. Although…
There’s a Student discount of 20% off at the dinner I work at ;) (Marie’s Diner)
I work the night shift children. I hand out free leftover hot chocolate and coffee.
Hey y’all! There’s a huge party at the boardwalk tonight! My friend Rose is throwing the party, I think there’s a food drive as well. Bring your own drinks, gas mask, and plan a get away plan if anything happens.
(Knowing Gotham being Gotham, something is probably gonna happen.)
Ayyy it’s actually a chill day today. Even tho it was hella nippy out, I still jammed on the street. Some gal on the Bone, a kid on the sax and a trumpet dude joined me at one point. We rocked ‘On Green Dolphin street’, ‘The Girl From Ipanema’, “‘Round Midnight”. Later some others joined in and ended up having a whole group so we got the chance to perform ‘Get Up Offa that Thing’ and “Superstition” . Honestly had a blast today!
Aunty Tam’s Tips
Part 4
✨Learn self defence ✨
First of all, I should probably address this.
Please- just avoid gotham. Don’t come to Gotham.
DON’T. COME. TO. GOTHAM.
I ain’t playin, don’t come to gotham
It’s one of the most dangerous cities there is
It’s practically hell
And for the people who live here, they usually didn’t come here as a choice
They’re either born here, and don’t have enough to move out of the city, or they moved here bc they’re broke
It’s the lowest of the low
Criminals run rampant here
There’s a mfing Insane Asylum that’s extremely outta commission but they use it regardless
It’s considered normal for a mugging or à robbery and it’s treated the same way as seeing a plane flying in the sky or perhaps a bird
On the bright side, gas prices are hella cheap here
Most things are pretty cheap
Anyways, learn some self defence
Once again, It’s Kill or be Killed here
Always be weary of your surroundings
Everyone is capable of jumping you
I’ve literally seen a 90 year old woman rob a guy with her pet Boa Constrictor
ALWAYS be weary of the old folks around here
They’re honestly so gangster af
Just treat them well, and you’re off the danger list
Learn how to punch, kick, hook, etc
I’d say the bare minimum for you to learn is to temporarily blind your attacker and flee
Best option for most fights is to flee, you ain’t being a coward, it’s just self preservation
Wear an extra layer underneath if you can
keep it concealed (you don’t want it sticking out)
It’s not usually warm so it won’t affect you with the extra layers
People usually use knives so i recommend Leather
Carry concealed weapons
Your boots are a great place for some knives or the inside of your coat
Your hat ig
Anyone out there wearing skirts, be sure that you have pockets. If it doesn’t, y’all can pay me 5 bucks and I’ll sew in pockets
Make sure the pockets for your skirt/dress are hidden. Best technique is using the folds from more flowy skirts/dresses
Carry bricks in your bag or purse, you can smack someone with it, gives out extra damage. Not only that, ig it helps with ur strength lol
If you don’t have any, improvise! Heck, channel your inner poc mom! Use la Chànclà, the belt, a wooden spoon, a broom, the clothes hanger, your shoe, the black mom crazy/stink eye glare, etc.
Ladies, you know how the wire from ur bra always ends up poking out? USE THE WIRES FROM THE BRA CUPS AS A WEAPON! (It may not last for long, but it works as brass knuckles)
Some weapons you can use from ur surroundings when you have none: Bricks, Empty beer bottles, YEET a trash can, the trash can lid as a shield, garbage (yeet it at them), sticks, stones, gravel, poles/rods, your phone, keys, YEET a bicycle, newspaper, backpack, glass, plastic bag (try to choke em ig?), pots, spoons, forks, cans, dog leashes (unattach your dog of course) and many moreee.
However, if you’re getting robbed by one of the rogues, just comply, it ain’t worth fighting back. (Just wait till one of the heroes arrive)
Try and build your stamina up
If you’re cornered into an alley, use your surroundings to escape
Basically, just parkour
If ur someone (This goes for everyone <3) who likes to wear heels, learn how to run in them
People won’t expect you to zoom like Sonic in them heels
Heels also prove to be an excellent weapon
That’s actually why strippers aren’t usually mugged lol. They usually have Cat Woman or Red hood watching their backs but Even if they aren’t there to save them, the strippers will gouge out your eye with their heels
they’re honestly the baddest b’s
Size doesn’t matter
A street kid that’s three times smaller than you will beat yo ass
