POCs and women are statistically less likely to be diagnosed as autistic. This not only means that they have a harder time getting a diagnosis, but they’re also less likely to be believed by the general public.
April 20th: What are your thoughts on terminology? (ie, high functioning and low functioning vs high support needs and low support needs, nonspeaking vs nonverbal, person first vs identity first, etc)
Personally I don’t use functioning labels for myself because I know the issues with how they’re used, and I know not every autistic person fits into these categories neatly. But I’ve also seen people who use the term low functioning for themselves because they find that it describes them well, and I have nothing against that. We all get to decide what terminology we use for ourselves and what terminology others should use for us.
As for high/low support needs, I think that terminology can be helpful, because it gives an idea of how much help the person needs with everyday things and it emphasizes the importance of support in our lives. Although I’d personally use these terms in the context of describing my needs to others so they know how to handle me (like, I consider myself to have low support needs so I’ll manage a lot of things). But I could be wrong. Again, everyone decides for themselves what terms to use for themselves.
I personally use identity first language for myself because I feel that person-first language is usually used for us by those who see being autistic as a disease, but if others prefer to use person-first for themselves and want it used for them, I’m okay with that, as long as they decide for themselves.
This is pretty much all I can type right now (I’m tired and have a headache) but TL;DR I think every autistic person has the right to decide what terms fit them and what they want to be called.
I find it valid. Professional diagnosis isn’t accessible for everyone; if you can’t access professional diagnosis, then self-diagnosis can be very helpful in understanding yourself, working out coping strategies and accommodations for yourself, and such. It can also be useful for those who are AFAB or people of color, who are likely to not be diagnosed or even misdiagnosed. And these are just a few reasons why someone might self-diagnose.
Here are a few posts that put it better than I can put it right now:
Basically, there are many valid reasons for self-diagnosis and every autistic person is welcome in the community, including those who don’t have a professional diagnosis.
April 18th: Do you have any pets? If not, do you want any in the future? Why or why not?
I don’t have any pets because there isn’t enough space for a pet in my home and I can’t afford a pet financially either. I do, however, want a cat in the future. Cats are my favorite animals for many reasons: they’re quite small, they make wonderful sounds, I like how they’re shaped, they’re diverse in their personalities, etc. And I really, really like the idea of living with one (or more!) of these creatures.
I know cats can be weird or difficult at times, but I think I can live with that. I believe it’s worth living with it. I believe cats return the love you give them. I believe I’ll learn a lot about life from taking care of a cat. Besides, I’ve always thought cats were great company and I doubt I’ll ever change my mind on that.
April 17th: Do you prefer fiction, nonfiction or a mix of both for entertainment?
I like both! I particularly like speculative fiction, like I said in previous posts. I also watch documentaries on history and read about linguistics/languages sometimes, and I watch video essays on YouTube if those count.
I often find it hard to decide what to watch/read because there’s a lot to choose from and there’s a lot of things I plan on reading/watching, and sometimes I get too fixated on one thing to engage with something I also intend to engage with, so at times, I spend more time on fiction than nonfiction or vice versa. But I’m generally interested in both.
April 16th: Talk about discovering yourself as an autistic person. When did you first find out you were autistic? If you were diagnosed, what was that process like? If you are self diagnosed, when did you first start to suspect that you could be autistic? How did you feel about it when you first found out compared to how you feel about it now? Have you gotten to a place of acceptance? What does being autistic mean to you?
Honestly, I don’t remember much about how my diagnosis happened/what it was like because I was diagnosed as a kid (like, around my last year of preschool). But I do know (partly from my own memories and partly from asking my parents) that I showed autistic traits when I was in kindergarten, such as special interests and playing better on my own, which is why she tried to get me diagnosed. Apart from that, I only vaguely remember having to see some psychologists (including a specialist who literally worked in another town and so I had to be taken out of town to see her) to be tested, and that I didn’t exactly understand what that was for. I just went with it.
IDK how I felt right when I first found out, I probably didn’t realize there was anything very different or “weird” with me. But I do remember that in elementary school, I realized how negatively most people saw autism and autistic kids at the time (and I feel that so many people still do), and I internalized those negative and harmful ideas. I’d honestly rather not talk about that time in my life, but basically, it was a dark time and I’m glad I’m past that.
As for how I feel about it now… Yeah, I can say I’ve gotten to a place of acceptance. Taking time to learn about autism from the internet as a teenager, particularly from blogs, videos and such by autistic people themselves, helped me understand not just myself, but other autistic people better and I think it taught me to be a better person in general. I think I could still do better at understanding, but I’ll keep trying to.
To me, being autistic has meant different things over the years. The meaning went from just being me to being a weirdo and a freak as I initially realized I was autistic, and as I grew up, it went back to just being me with all its positives and negatives. I think I’m alright with being me. Even with my difficulties. In fact, I think I benefited from growing up different and having to accept that.
April 15th: Media is something that has the power to speak to a lot of different people in different ways. What are some media (movies, tv shows, books, etc) that really speaks to you as an autistic person? Something that you can really relate to?
When it comes to media, I mostly get into speculative fiction, sci-fi and fantasy in particular, because I like exploring the kind of concepts that come up in those genres and they often come with worldbuilding that I can immerse myself in. I also particularly like fiction with non-human characters, which may or may not have to do with having grown up autistic and therefore different from most people I knew. In fact, as a kid, I preferred fiction about animals because I found it easier to relate to animals than other people at the time.
If I have to name one thing that really speaks to me now, I think I’ll name Star Trek. Partly because of characters like Spock and Data who are clearly different from the humans and end up clashing with or being misunderstood by others because of this, and are also clearly good and sympathetic characters, important members of the crew and have people who value and care about them. And that really appeals to me! But I also find that the whole idea of “infinite diversity in infinite combinations” really speaks to me (which is probably very idealistic of me, but whatever).
(Apart from that, I’m currently a fan of Star Wars, but I think that’s mostly for reasons other than relatability.)
April 14th: Talk about connections, platonic and/or romantic. Who are some of the most important people in your life? Is it generally hard for you to connect with people? If it is, what kind of issues do you have with it? Do you find it easier to get along with other autistic people?
Personally, I feel the most important people in my life are my family, a couple friends from school, and a couple friends from the internet. They are the ones I can be truly open, honest, vulnerable, basically, myself around.
To be honest, I only call a few people “my friends” even if I do see other people regularly too and do know those people well. Either because I’m not sure if they would consider me a friend too (given how withdrawn I am and how little I talk to others), or because… well, I’m withdrawn and not sure if I’m connected to them enough to call them more than acquaintances.
Yeah, I’d say it’s generally hard for me to connect with other people. Not that I never do, but when I do, it’s with those few friends I have. I think there are multiple reasons for this:
I find it hard to tell people about the things I like for fear that they’ll judge me for it or be bored by it. Unless they’re obviously also into what I’m into.
Even if I know there’s some shared interest that can make us connect, I’m scared to have an actual conversation with the other person because what if they find me annoying? Or boring? What if they don’t want to talk to me at all? People say I’m nice so I guess these fears are unfounded, but they’re often still there… especially when the other person seems so cool and I kind of worry that they’ll find me uncool. So I just don’t talk to them. Because I’m scared.
Or I just can’t figure out what to talk to the other person about. I know “hello, how are you?” is a way to start conversation, but I often don’t know how to take the conversation past that. Like, there’s a lot things that I think about and I don’t know which one to bring into the conversation, or how I should bring my thoughts up in a way that isn’t too sudden or weird somehow. Or I’m just not sure if they’d find my thoughts interesting. Or if my thoughts should be talked about at all right there and then. Or I just feel really scared of sharing what I think. Or I’m just in one of those hours when for some reason, I feel like there’s a barrier separating me from other people and I just get stuck with my own thoughts. Sometimes, it’s because I’m just too invested in my own thoughts to talk. Or I’m not sure if others will understand what I’m thinking about. Or… I don’t know why, but it happens.
And sometimes, I just find that I don’t have anything in common with the other person, and that’s fine. (Although it’s not always easy for me to tell if I really have nothing in common with them or I’m just out of touch.)ű
But when we do share interests, and I know for sure that they tolerate me and I can talk to them about basically anything… I can connect with people. I guess I just have to really get to know them and get past my mental barrier before we’re friends.
And… yeah, it’s probably easier for me to get on with other ND people. In my experience, the kindest people I’ve met at school were the ones who were ND in some way (including one guy with autistic-like traits). I also find it easier to talk to other autistic/ND people online, probably because I know that being ND is something we have in common. I do have NT friends I get along with, though.
April 30th: Do you like to plan ahead for things or do you like to “just go with the flow” and see what happens? A mix of both? Does it vary by day to day?
I don’t really like doing things… totally spontaneously, so I’ll say I prefer to plan ahead. Planning out big things or following through with plans I make for myself isn’t easy for me, but it’s still better to know what to expect and what to do than to just… see what happens, and then find that something I absolutely didn’t expect just happened and that I have zero clue what to do about it.
Besides, I find it kinda fun to think about what I’ll do in my free time next. It gives me a sense of hope, I suppose. Or just occupies my mind well. I don’t know exactly why, I just think it’s nice.
(Due to personal reasons, I haven’t been able to do the past few days properly so I just did all the ones I missed in one day.)
April 26th: Do you stim? What sort of stims do you have? What do you wish people knew about stimming?
Yes. (It’s right in my URL.) I stim with my fingers (wiggle them, tap them, touch the spaces between them with my thumb), I rock back and forth or side to side (especially when I hear music I like), I fidget with small objects like pens, I tap my feet, I wiggle the foot that’s in the air when I sit in a chair with my legs crossed… hell, crossing my legs all the time might be a stim itself (pressure stimming). And that is just some of them, I just don’t have the time to write all of them down right now.
What I want people to know about stimming is why it happens/why we do it and what to do about it, ie. to learn to live with it if it’s not hurting anyone and learn how to help others with harmful stimming. I just want people to inform themselves about as many aspects of it as possible, really. And most importantly, to understand that stimming isn’t something that can just be removed from an autistic person. That it’s a part of how we work.
April 27th: Do you have trouble identifying physical feelings like hunger or being tired? Do you have trouble with identifying emotions?
Identifying physical feelings isn’t that hard for me, but I do have a bit of a problem with thinking I’m hungry every time I feel some kind of sensation in my stomach that feels like hunger. Fortunately, that doesn’t immediately make me eat (at least not usually), and I do know that it’s not always hunger… it’s just easy to confuse.
Emotions, on the other hand, aren’t easy for me to identify. I do know when I feel good/comfortable and when I feel bad/uncomfortable, and I have some idea of what the basic emotions feel like, but identifying specific emotions (beyond the basic ones) and what exactly caused them can be difficult and confusing. I’m not sure if it’s because of autism or just because emotions are complicated in general, but… like I said, it’s not easy.
April 28th: Can you drive? If so, do you like driving? If not, do you want to learn?
No. I do like driving as a concept… I guess, but I’m not too sure about learning to drive. It seems very complicated to me and I’m not sure if I have the capacity to focus on it properly, or the coordination for it. Besides, I’m not the most fond of actually sitting in a car. It gets hot easily, the … car smell feels overwhelming at times (especially when the inside of a car is dusty), it’s just not pleasant to me in general.
April 29th: What sort of things do you like to do to relax/for self care?
To relax, I like doodling/coloring, writing/typing stuff that doesn’t require much effort just for the sake of it, listening to soft/calming music, looking at pictures of cats or my favorite characters, drinking some water, watching cat videos or clips from movies/shows I like, and browsing Wiktionary (I just love words and I like etymology and translations in particular).
For self-care, I like eating snacks, using soap that smells good in the shower, and eating a good meal (when I know what to eat and I feel that what I’m eating is Just Right).
April 25th: Do you struggle with switching tasks or is it easy for you? Does it depend on the task/situation?
I don’t think it’s easy. Even if I get distracted from what I’m doing and try to do something else, it still happens often that I don’t really focus on that other thing either. Or sometimes, I just think about doing that other thing… and I don’t. OR I do switch to another task out of distraction, but that doesn’t always happen.
I think it’s harder to switch when I AM focused on one thing, though, because I forget about other things I need to do, lose track of time, or just… find it hard to go do something else.
I think it does depend on the task and situation. It’s easier when I’m not very focused on the task I’m currently doing, and it’s easier to switch between tasks I do in one place (like at my desk). I think it’s harder when I’m tired as well.
April 24th: How easy is it for you to focus on things? Are you easily distracted? Is it harder if it’s something you’re not interested in?
I’ve said it before in other posts, but I’m easily distracted most of the time and don’t find it easy to focus. I often find it hard to focus when I’m trying to read something in a busy environment, for example, because the sensations around me can be distracting. I also often get distracted by my own thoughts in the middle of a conversation, or when I’m trying to read/watch something. And when I’m trying to write something but don’t know how to go on with it, I tend to just stop and look at or listen to what’s around me, which makes it hard for me to finish what I start writing.
Oh, and I have a problem with starting drawings or pieces of writing, then never finishing them because I don’t pay enough attention to them. I don’t know if that is relevant to the prompt, but I thought I’d mention it.
It’s easier for me to focus on something if I’m interested in it, though. Like, I can focus on books that are interesting to me, I can focus (somewhat) on writing about something I’m interested in, and I’ve worked a lot on drawings that I really wanted to draw. But I think sometimes, I get distracted from stuff that I actually did want to do by something that seems more interesting, so… it’s not always easier to focus if I’m interested in the thing. But it often is.
April 23rd: If you could live absolutely anywhere, real or fictional, where would you live? What would your dream home look like?
I’ve thought about this question before, and find it hard to answer because there’s a lot of choice in this matter and there isn’t just one place that appeals to me. (And I guess I’ve never been the best at making decisions. But that’s kind of a self-deprecating thing to say…)
But I guess I’d like to live in a small town or the countryside, preferably somewhere in a climate that isn’t too cold or hot. Or somewhere close to the mountains or a forest, or at least not too far, so I don’t have to travel too far to go for a hike or a trip to the woods. And I’d prefer to live in a smallish kind of home, like an apartment or a house just big enough for me and a pet (a cat or dog, I think). And possibly another person or two who I really trust and love.
If fictional places count, I’d say… somewhere in Middle-earth (from Tolkien’s works), like the Shire. I’ve also thought about what it’d be like to live in the Star Wars or Star Trek universe, but… as exciting as traveling in space and visiting other planets sounds, I think living a kind of peaceful life like in the Shire is more suited for the person I am in real life. So I guess I’ll save the space journeys for my imagination.
“The need to counter the negative messages and the suppression of autistic voices is inherent in the mission of autism acceptance and neurodiversity libraries.”
All terms I’ve created are based on this post. These are accessible versions of those flags.
Please do not use those flags and terms if you are not disabled. /gen
High Support Flag
High support: Anyone who isn’t able to live independently and needs help with some or all of their basic daily living skills such as eating, bathing, basic grooming, putting on makeup, getting dressed and completing tasks. Can be abbreviated online or in writing as HSP for High Support Person or HSAP for High Support Autistic Person.
Usage in speech: Clarissa is a high support autistic person and needs assistance with getting dressed and taking a shower. Abbreviated usage online: I’m a HSAP and I’m really into physics, so the poor sucker who signs me on is gonna hear a lot about it when they hand me my iPad!
[Image ID: A dark blue flag with a symbol in the middle. A large navy blue circle is in the middle, inside there is a pastel rainbow infinity symbol. The flag is made up of three horizontal bands, the middle one being much smaller. The colors are, in order, pastel navy blue, navy blue, pastel navy blue.]
Medium Support Flag
Medium support: Anyone may or may not live independently and doesn’t need help with basic living skills, but needs help with other things like cooking, completing some tasks, transportation if unable to drive and assistance for things like grocery shopping. Can be abbreviated online or in writing as MSP for Medium Support Person or MSAP for Medium Support Autistic Person.
Usage in speech: Kevin is a medium support autistic person and needs some assistance to prepare meals and shop for the wood he uses for his carpentry projects. His boyfriend, Max, usually helps him with those. Usage online: I’m a MSAP and I’m looking for info about saws. Any fellow auties know what’s best for cutting oak?
[Image ID: A moustard yellow flag with a symbol in the middle. A large navy blue circle is in the middle, inside there is a pastel rainbow infinity symbol. The flag is made up of three horizontal bands, the middle one being much smaller. The colors are, in order, pastel moustard yellow, moustard yellow, pastel moustard yellow.]
Low Support Flag
Low support: Anyone who more often than not lives independently and may only need assistance with minor things like balancing a checkbook, getting started on some tasks like organizing a garage sale or arranging to move from one house to another. Can be abbreviated online or in writing as LSP for Low Support Person or LSAP for Low Support Autistic Person.
Usage in speech: Jesse is a low support autistic person and she only needs help keeping her checkbook balanced. Usage online: I’m a LSAP and I’m thinking about moving to Seattle. What’s the weather and traffic like there?
[Image ID: A green flag with a symbol in the middle. A large navy blue circle is in the middle, inside there is a pastel rainbow infinity symbol. The flag is made up of three horizontal bands, the middle one being much smaller. The colors are, in order, lime, teal, lime.]
Supportflux Flag
Supportflux: Anyone who has a need of support fluctuating over time. Can be abbreviated online or in writing as SFP for SupportFlux Person or SFAP for SupportFlux Autistic Person.
[Image ID: A dark blue flag with a symbol in the middle. A large navy blue circle is in the middle, inside there is a pastel rainbow infinity symbol. The flag is made up of three horizontal bands, the middle one being much smaller. In the middle of the flag there is a gradient from left to right where all the colors of the lines change. They are turning (left) from lime, teal, lime to pastel navy blue, navy blue, pastel navy blue (right).]
Medi-High Support
Medi-High Support: Anyone who is medium support needs but can’t live independently, seems like a combination of medium and high support. Can be abbreviated online or in writing as MHSP for Medi-High Support Person or MHSAP for Medi-High Support Autistic Person.
[Image ID: A pastel cyan flag with a symbol in the middle. A large navy blue circle is in the middle, inside there is a pastel rainbow infinity symbol. The flag is made up of three horizontal bands, the middle one being much smaller. The colors are, in order, pastel cyan, cyan, pastel cyan.]
Low-Medium Support
Low-Medium Support: Anyone who is low support needs but can’t live 100% independently and/or have many difficulties doing such, seems like a combination of low and medium support. Can be abbreviated online or in writing as LMSP for Low-Medium Support Person or LMSAP for Low-Medium Support Autistic Person.
Term and flag coined by @themogaidragon. Requested by @cutelittle-organc0llector.
[Image ID: A yellowed green flag with a symbol in the middle. A large navy blue circle is in the middle, inside there is a pastel rainbow infinity symbol. The flag is made up of three horizontal bands, the middle one being much smaller. The colors are, in order, pastel yellowed green, yellowed green, pastel yellowed green.]
