Any other nd people remember just intensely identifying with creep by radiohead in middle school? Just that feeling of alienation and feeling like I didn’t belong really hit home with me
I tend to assume everyone is the same as me. Like if I’m sitting next to someone and a spot opens up next to me, my first instinct is to move a seat down from the person to give them space, since I would appreciate that in their place. Often, this would be viewed as offensive since it would seem to them that I don’t like them. Is it an autistic thing to have a hard time grasping that other people have different knowledge, opinions, wants, and needs from you? Also if someone ever moves away from you, don’t feel to bad about it. It might be someone like me, who means it in a nice way!
Common myth: “neurotypicals don’t stim”. This is actually false. Neurotypical people do stim, it’s just usually in a slightly different way. Common stims that you might notice a neurotypical doing include: nail biting, hair twirling, leg bouncing, foot tapping, pen biting, skin picking, knuckle cracking and more. These are stims that go unnoticed most of the time because they are so common. Autistic people’s stims are usually more noticeable. Stims you might see autistic people doing include: hand flapping, rocking, echolalia (repeating words or phrases), head banging, excessive blinking, spinning in circles and more. Stimming is not an exclusive autism trait. It’s the short term for “self-stimulatory behaviours” which every human being does in one way or another. It’s a completely normal way of regulating emotions. I’ve seen some people saying “neurotypicals don’t stim, they fidget” but fidgeting is actually a form of stimming.
The reasons why a neurotypical stims is usually different to why an autistic person does, however, the reasons can be the same. Stimming can help in stressful situations where anxiety levels are high. You’re more likely to notice a neurotypical person stimming when they are particularly anxious, for example in an exam or a job interview. Autistic people stim as a way of expressing emotions, for example we will stim when we are happy or excited, not just when we are anxious. Autistic people frequently experience sensory overloads and stimming helps to calm us down.
I find it ironic and hypocritical when neurotypicals make fun of autistics for stimming when they literally stim too. My parents will comment on my stimming when my mum is sat there biting her nails and my dad is bouncing his leg and picking his skin. How are my stims wrong and their stims right? Before you judge an autistic person for stimming take a look at yourself because I can guarantee you stim in one way or another. Let’s normalise and embrace stimming because not only is it beautiful, it’s incredibly important. Suppressing stims can be detrimental to our mental health.
Embrace the stim! No matter how big or small! All stims are valid!!
I’ve always thought that if neurotypicals just tried hand flapping, they’d like it but noooo, they’ve gotta insist that stimming is weird even though they do it too.
Routines don’t have to be doing the same things at the same time every day. Sometimes, it’s choosing the exact same options in a video game every single time, even if the game gives you a variety of choices (looking at you, Life is Strange). Sometimes it’s checking your apps in the same order when you wake up in the morning. Or when your songs MUST be in the same order when you listen to them. I personally dislike routines like “wake up at 10 a.m. and have oatmeal for breakfast, shower at 11, etc.” However, I love doing everything else that I listed. I worried about being a fake autistic before I realized that those were routines too.
me, every time I get a new hyperfixation: oh my god, this thing is so wonderful! I’m literally going to love this thing at this same intensity until the day I die.
me, when the hyperfixation ends: my identity as a person is shattered. there is a void that will never be filled. I will never move on from this.
me, when I get my next hyperfixation: oh my god, this thing is so wonderful! I’m literally going to love this thing until I die!
Don’t assume autistic people can do everything you can do but also don’t assume that we can’t do something. Ask us about our individual abilities, since we’re all different. And if we ask for help, give it if you can.
Stop perpetuating the idea that avoiding eye contact = lying. Some of us are just autistic and shouldn’t have to force ourselves to make eye contact just to avoid being called liars.
Same goes for fidgeting. It doesn’t necessarily mean someone’s lying or nervous. It could just be the result of neurodivergence.
Many, many neurotypical people who are not from English-speaking Western culture will also not look you in the eye if you are an authority, because in their culture, that’s how you show respect.
And people with albinism and other low vision conditions often have something called rhythmatic nystagmus, where their eyes move back and forth uncontrollably.
It’s ableist against more groups than just the neurodivergent and it’s ethnocentric, bordering on outright racist, to perceive “not looking you in the eye” as dishonest or disrespectful.
Oh no it IS outright racist. That many Indigenous people don’t make eye contact ESPECIALLY with strangers was widely used against them because: SEE THEY ARE LIARS. DECEITFUL. HIDING THINGS.
I didn’t know that. This is a very important addition to my post.
Stop perpetuating the idea that avoiding eye contact = lying. Some of us are just autistic and shouldn’t have to force ourselves to make eye contact just to avoid being called liars.
Same goes for fidgeting. It doesn’t necessarily mean someone’s lying or nervous. It could just be the result of neurodivergence.
I saw this tweet about how things don’t always “occur” to adhd people and I thought I could relate to it as well, although I’m autistic and not adhd.
For example - if I have a headache, it simply won’t occur to me to take pain meds. I know I have a headache. I want the pain to stop. I am aware of the existence of pain meds. But the idea never occurs to me to take them until someone else suggests it.
The example they gave in the tweet was that if someone says hello to them, it may not occur to them to say hello back and yep… I do that as well.
I just never realized that other people may not do these things.
This is called executive dysfunction and it’s very common for both adhd and autistic people! <3
I was under the impression that executive dysfunction was being unable to transition between tasks. Like that feeling when you’re trying to get up and make some food, but your brain won’t let you no matter how hard you try. Is that something different?
They are both forms of executive dysfunction! Executive dysfunction simply means one of your executive functions isn’t working. The executive functions are:
Emotional control
Task initiation
Working memory
Self-monitoring (interoception, something a lot of autistics struggle with)
Flexibility
Organization
Planning & time management
Self control
What you’re experiencing and what you already considered executive dysfunction are both issues with task initiation, and I think what you’re experiencing is also an issue with planning.
The reason ADHD and autism are so similar is that the executive functions are impacted; among other symptoms and traits, they are both executive functioning disorders. Which is why you experience this thing that a lot of ADHDers experience, and why ADHD and autism have such a high comorbidity rate.
I saw this tweet about how things don’t always “occur” to adhd people and I thought I could relate to it as well, although I’m autistic and not adhd.
For example - if I have a headache, it simply won’t occur to me to take pain meds. I know I have a headache. I want the pain to stop. I am aware of the existence of pain meds. But the idea never occurs to me to take them until someone else suggests it.
The example they gave in the tweet was that if someone says hello to them, it may not occur to them to say hello back and yep… I do that as well.
I just never realized that other people may not do these things.
This is called executive dysfunction and it’s very common for both adhd and autistic people! <3
I was under the impression that executive dysfunction was being unable to transition between tasks. Like that feeling when you’re trying to get up and make some food, but your brain won’t let you no matter how hard you try. Is that something different?
Since I have both Tourette’s and autism, I decided to make this venn diagram to explain the differences and similarities between tics and stims. This is based on my experiences and my understanding of other people’s experiences. I may be wrong in some parts, but I’m pretty sure this general idea is correct. I find this much more helpful than the yawn/sneeze metaphor, personally.
I saw this tweet about how things don’t always “occur” to adhd people and I thought I could relate to it as well, although I’m autistic and not adhd.
For example - if I have a headache, it simply won’t occur to me to take pain meds. I know I have a headache. I want the pain to stop. I am aware of the existence of pain meds. But the idea never occurs to me to take them until someone else suggests it.
The example they gave in the tweet was that if someone says hello to them, it may not occur to them to say hello back and yep… I do that as well.
I just never realized that other people may not do these things.
Or if I’m cold, it won’t occur to me to get a jacket. I’m just like “oh well, guess I’ll just be cold.”
I saw this tweet about how things don’t always “occur” to adhd people and I thought I could relate to it as well, although I’m autistic and not adhd.
For example - if I have a headache, it simply won’t occur to me to take pain meds. I know I have a headache. I want the pain to stop. I am aware of the existence of pain meds. But the idea never occurs to me to take them until someone else suggests it.
The example they gave in the tweet was that if someone says hello to them, it may not occur to them to say hello back and yep… I do that as well.
I just never realized that other people may not do these things.
