#dont rb

*sighs* you leave a reply on a post, saying that oriented alloaro is a term that exists and someone thinks that implies you don’t know that non sam aros exist when you do know they exist and have headmates who are non sam aro.

(-Rift)

someone is def dying in s4 of stranger things though. so i volunteer jonathan-

a note:.

that is sort of an apology for not being very active here, and some feelings, or a vent idk

it’s winter, and that after-dark bad feeling is worse because my princeis still far away. i know it won’t be long until we’re together- but time isn’t moving fast enough and i’m frustrated. i also have sprained knuckles on my right hand and writing this is taking way too long for my liking. everything is frustrating. i just want softness and warmth and laughs and kisses but i don’t have that! I have to keep waiting. and I will. it’ll be so worth it. I just don’t like waiting to see him, to hold him, just.. be with him. anyway, i’m just tired and …

can a knight not have their stupid hurt dominant hand homoerotically bandaged (and kissed) by their beloved prince?

.:champion

PS- i’ll be setting up a knightly queue…

a friend Grabbed my belt today (while it was on me) and it was in a context where i think they just thought it looked cool and wanted to “steal” it but part of my gay brain was like ???????? ????? ‽‽‽‽‽‽‽‽‽ hello????? hi?????????????¿??¿¿¿? help me i am passing away????? fuck?????????

okay so i had a nightmare my sister got kidnapped in front of me and i couldnt save her (this is a recurring nightmare) and like im already punishing myself for it — could you IMAGINE if i was responsible for saving peoples lives irl, id fucking kms or something

my life is helllll they dont have the monster high reproductions in any of the walmarts near us

whitefsng got a cold and im gonna die if i cant kiss them soon everyone tell them to get rid of their cold right now

i fucked up m y back so bad and i knew i was doing it but i ws working on a project and i was so xcited about it but i was hunched over on the floor for like 2 days straigh t because of it and now im paying the price ):

so many stores are putting out pride stuff early i feel so crazy

maybe its something to do with feeling alienated from gender period. like i feel like i can get close to it when i think about gender as a presentation thing but even when it comes to like agender as an identity it didnt sit right with me because its an identity in its self and i feel like i dont have that. like the only way i can accurately describe myself is genderless because its not a noun its an adjective. its like answering ‘whats your gender’ with ‘i dont have one’ instead of ‘agender’ which feels like too much substance. to me, anyway. if other people like it thats obviously fine

am i cringe forfeeling left out that there are way fewer memes/jokes about people who use they pronouns than people who useshe and he. like i still like those jokes and i dont think there should be less of them i just cant even be the ‘im whatever gender makes the joke funny’ kind of person because it makes me uncomfortable to be gendered at all . and im not saying please manufacture pronoun jokes for the theythems right now either its just like. idk. i want to be in on the gnc pronouns funny genderjokes without having tobe like haha yeah i can be a girl in themoment i guess

for once in my life i want to google a question about renting an apartment and have the first result not be catered towards landlords who want to wring me dry of all the money i have

really love the very professional business people walking through the furcon looking at all of the fursuiters like o__o….

HELLO THE UNIVERSE SAID SORRY ABOUT NOT GETTING THE REPRODUCTIONS IN YOUR AREA HERES A 50$+ DOLL FOR 7$ ?

its Right there proshippers please block me and leave i dont care

the stress of the past few days has finally caught up with me but I’m also too numb to cry about it

my work has been calling me in at 6:30-7am almost every day for a month now n i cant take it anymore seriously im seriously at my limit

this job is going to give me an ulcer

I lost my nightgown and I lost my medicine so I haven’t taken it in two days and I’m fucking anxious and crying God I hate this

So we might be homeless soon

the problem is that like. it’s really common for cis people to think that transmascs identify as masc/men so that we won’t be subject to misogyny anymore when that’s not even remotely true.

like every single transmasc i know is well aware of the fact that they’re not going to get to stop being the target of sexism just because they changed their identity? reproductive and sexual health issues that affect cis women will continue to affect afab trans people, especially bc a huge number of us will never be able to physically transition. we will continue to “pass” and be read as women, with all the consequences of that. sexist sentiments will materially harm us, as will transphobic ones, because we’re still trans. there is literally No social benefit that we’re going to magically gain by identifying out of womanhood. but it’s very convenient and desirable for cis women, especially, to act like afab trans people are traitors to their sex class, because it essentializes us down to our genitals + agab + cis women never want to confront the fact that they may have material privilege over non-cis people. when terfs talk about ‘desisting’/‘detransitioning’ — weaponizing the stories of trans people with fluid gender identities and complex transition stories — when they fearmonger about permanent damage to bodies due to hormones/surgery, when they pick out young afabs online to groom into their poisonous ideology; the targets are trans & nonbinary people. we must be groomed and radicalized into this culty crab bucket so we don’t realise or action our transness or depart from the gender binary in any way. terfs have an outright, murderous hatred of transfems and a slow, treacherous loathing for afab trans people where they will abuse us to the ends of the earth mentally and emotionally and socially so that we don’t dare to be trans. there is nothing non-violent about this, they do not like us and their sympathy for us is entirely fake and it is designed to remove us from existence in one way or another.

also the way i gasped when i saw that gepard is a standard banner character??

I’m just fucking bored of being depressed. It is so draining feeling numb.

keysmasjing in the notes app IS therapy!

if i have to see someone act like just saying you have a hormonal imbalance - lying about being intersex - will protect you from misgendering again i think i might just cry

dont rb this, its a vent post not a hot take and it doesnt show all my nuanced thoughts on the matter, thanks

YALL THAT BITCH FUCKING WAS CHEATING ON ME THE WHOLE TIME. WITH LITERALLY NO REMORSE. YALL FUCK THIS SAD BULLSHIT IM BEING HAPPY FROM NOW ON. IM A DREAM GIRL. CUTE GIRLS PLEASE INTERACT.

me and the girl she was also fuckin with are friends now

୨୧ meet us!

┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄ ☆

NICOLAS+ JAMES/NICO || THEY/HE/SHE || nonbinary acespec veldian!

AMBRA+ EMBER/RHYS || BOO/PY/SPOOK/SHE/IT || ghostgender aceflux lesbian!

CAVITY+ CAVI || SHE/XE || sapphic damseboy!

CHARLIE+ CHARLES || HE/THEY/KIT || softgender lesbian!

DORIAN+ DORI || HE/SHE || xenic bigender bisexual!

TOBIAS+ TOBY/BAT/BRUCE || X/IT/THAT THING || neutrois aroace!

TOXIN+ TORI/TOX || THEY/THEM || everique gai princian!

VERAIT/SHE || toric loveglirusic pixelgirl!

i think an important part about the trauma model of dissociation is how it ties such a big, wholly connected picture together in a humanizing way

a lot of people make distinctions between “systems” and “singlets” and while in some conversations that might be useful to distinguish, in others it might not be, especially when it comes to those who are more in the middle of the spectrum (of which even OSDD can be included, due to how 1a and the other variations present)

because at the end of the day, anyone can experience dissociation. it can ramp up massively after experiencing trauma, or it can be a huge part of your entire life, just not to the point of complete identity compartmentalization since that can only happen while youre still developing the groundworks for it

its good for people of specific experiences to have their own spaces and stuff, but at some point you almost have to look at a kind of self-othering you might fall into (or even unnecessary discounting of those with similar, even if not exact, experiences) because at the end of the day, what OSDD-1 and DID are, are a big handful of trauma symptoms and normal survival experiences turned up to 100, and not some intrinsic difference or anything. when you start to learn about stuff it might be “interesting” at first, but i think you almost come out of it more, sentimental if anything, with a sense of it not really being all that weird or different at all. i see people whove done little to no research about the subject just be so confused about everything and i almost dont see how anymore because it really makes a lot of sense..

been dreaming continually about guys loving me and thinking I’m pretty and cute and the most beautiful person in the world and kissing me why can’t these thoughts leave me alone. and I only started having these dreams when I shaved my head cause I think I look horrible now ☹️

maybe if someone kissed me when I looked like this everything would be ok

sorry I’m obsessed with these photos like I can’t stop staring at myself I’ve posted these almost everyday already

thinking of changing to a tetia theme….