#glee incorrect quotes

glee as wattpad comments:

ARTIE

artie: poggers was not used correctly in this paragraph. please revise this.

FINN

finn: u dont become sad… sad becomes u

QUINN

quinn: i would like to live as a nun now.

BRITTANY

brittany: If you dont want to be sad, just be happy :)

brittany: BABIES COME IN A SACK FULL OF FLUID?

brittany: oh shit this said lebanese i thought u meant lesbian

SAM

sam:maybe fan fiction is a mistake

sam: i want to go to australia but i’m afraid of getting attacked by a kangaroo

sam: *sighs* he’s gonna get pregnant

KURT

kurt: is reincarnation optional can’t i just stop here

kurt: breathing is a red flag for me

kurt: ur voluntarily working in customer service? u have a humiliation kink or something?

PUCK

puck: side step right left beat my meat

puck: what if the milfs really are lonely and need a friend to talk to

puck: valley?? i call it the titty crack

puck: i was told there will be milfs

Rachel: I love you guys, you’re the best thing that’s happened to me.

Kurt: We’re the best thing that’s ever happened to you?

Rachel: Yes!

Santana: I’m starting to feel a little sorry for you.

blaine: could you not stand so close? you’re making me claustrophobic

sam: what does claustrophobic mean?

brittany: it means he’s afraid of Santa Claus

blaine: no, it doesn’t

sam: HO HO HO

brittany: stop it, you’re scaring him!!!

santana: why do you want that toy so badly? It’s for ages 5 and up

brittany: yeah, and I’m a part of the “up”!

sam: today is a day of running through hurdles.
kurt: aren’t you supposed to jump OVER hurdles?
sam: whatever. fear is only something to be afraid of if you let it scare you.