#hard night

CW: dead pet/cat death/pet euthanasia

Y’all I am not having a good night. I lost my 15 year old cat from childhood two days ago and everytime I close my eyes to try and go to sleep I just keep seeing the whole process of him being put down over and over in my mind. It’s like my mind is on a constant loop of seeing the life go out in his eyes and then seeing his limp body just laying there. I’m so glad I was able to be there for him in his last moments but this fucking sucks and I miss him so much.

Someone once asked me what the most powerful thing in the world was. I could have said money or power or even love, but instead I said words.

Almost:

He almost loved her.

She almost stopped caring.

Theyalmost made it.

Sometimes:

SometimesI want to die.

Its okay sometimes to be sad.

Sometimes I still miss him.

Always:

Iwill always love her.

He is always on my mind.

Anymore:

I don’t love you anymore.

Words. They change the world around us. They change us. They changed me. I changed others with them. And that is what makes them so powerful. 

Some nights are harder than others.

Tonight is one of those nights.