ctitan98:

Y/N convinces Alcina to sing a song at an open mic night

Alcina: *Sitting at a table while she waits for her time slot, annoyed that she let Y/N convince her to do this*

Y/N: *Playing pool and drinking beer, goofing off with Sal and Karl, steadily getting drunk*

10 minutes later

Some rando: *Finishes playing their song*

Mother Miranda: *Hosting, shoos them off the stage* Alright, well, that was truly awful, I’m not going to lie… personally, I like a little bit of Mozart or Bach. It stimulates the brain you know!

The audience: *Booing Miranda for being such a jerk*

Mother Miranda: *Rolls her eyes, looks at the lineup, sighs with relief* Finally! Someone with a little talent in this god-forsaken hellhole. Please welcome to the stage, the legendary, Miss D!

The audience: *Cheers and claps*

Mother Miranda: *Walks over to the bar* I need a drink. These people suck. Guess they’ll be the next batch of experiments. *Snags a bottle of tequila and drinks straight from it*

Bartender: *Horrified by what they just heard and saw*

Alcina: *Gets onstage*

Y/N: *Whistling and yelling loudly, really drunk at this point* Yeah! Thass mah wiFfeE! We have sEeXxx AllLlL the timeE! You’re all jeaLOus!

Alcina: *Growls and yells at Y/N* Stop it, Y/N! Our intimacy is not to be discussed here! *Gets ready to introduce the song*

Y/N: *Calls out from the audience* FreEe BiRd! Do Freee birrd!

Alcina: *Groans, yells at Karl* Keep Y/N quiet so I can sing this damn song and go home!

Karl: *Clamps a hand over Y/N’s mouth*

Alcina: *Clears her throat, composes herself* Now, this song is-

Y/N: *Bites Karl’s hand and he lets go*

Karl: Fuck! You stupid little dumbass! *Pulls his hand away from Y/N*

Y/N: *Stands on a bar stool, waving their arms so Alcina will notice them* Hey! HhHeEY! Show us your tits!

The audience: *Cheers and whistles*

Alcina: *Blushes hard, gasps* Y/N! You knock off this vulgar behavior this instant!

Y/N: I'mMM GonNaa LIvEE ForeVverr! *Trips and falls on top of Sal* Whoa! Thanks for breaking my fall!

Sal: *Face smushed into the floor, offers a muffled reply* Don’t mention it…

Y/N: *Thinks and calls out to Alcina* Can you do Sweet Caroline?! You know, the one that goes- *Sings horribly out of tune* SwEeT CaAArOLinne!

Y/N and the audience: BUM BUM BUMMM! *Everyone continues singing the song because they’re all drunk and rowdy*

Alcina: *Looks for Miranda* Mother Miranda, I must-

Mother Miranda: *Fucking crowd surfing while belting out the song as loud as she can with everybody else*

Alcina: *Stunned*

Mother Miranda: *Takes a couple more swigs of tequila, super drunk, winks and flashes a nipple at the crowd* If you want to see the rest, that’s gonna cost you!

The audience and Y/N: *Going fucking crazy and cheering*

Y/N: *Shoving a wad of cash at Miranda* Shut up and take my money!

The way she is going to regret