ctitan98:

Y/N convinces Alcina to sing a song at an open mic night

Alcina: *Sitting at a table while she waits for her time slot, annoyed that she let Y/N convince her to do this*

Y/N: *Playing pool and drinking beer, goofing off with Sal and Karl, steadily getting drunk*

10 minutes later

Some rando: *Finishes playing their song*

Mother Miranda: *Hosting, shoos them off the stage* Alright, well, that was truly awful, I’m not going to lie… personally, I like a little bit of Mozart or Bach. It stimulates the brain you know!

The audience: *Booing Miranda for being such a jerk*

Mother Miranda: *Rolls her eyes, looks at the lineup, sighs with relief* Finally! Someone with a little talent in this god-forsaken hellhole. Please welcome to the stage, the legendary, Miss D!

The audience: *Cheers and claps*

Mother Miranda: *Walks over to the bar* I need a drink. These people suck. Guess they’ll be the next batch of experiments. *Snags a bottle of tequila and drinks straight from it*

Bartender: *Horrified by what they just heard and saw*

Alcina: *Gets onstage*

Y/N: *Whistling and yelling loudly, really drunk at this point* Yeah! Thass mah wiFfeE! We have sEeXxx AllLlL the timeE! You’re all jeaLOus!

Alcina: *Growls and yells at Y/N* Stop it, Y/N! Our intimacy is not to be discussed here! *Gets ready to introduce the song*

Y/N: *Calls out from the audience* FreEe BiRd! Do Freee birrd!

Alcina: *Groans, yells at Karl* Keep Y/N quiet so I can sing this damn song and go home!

Karl: *Clamps a hand over Y/N’s mouth*

Alcina: *Clears her throat, composes herself* Now, this song is-

Y/N: *Bites Karl’s hand and he lets go*

Karl: Fuck! You stupid little dumbass! *Pulls his hand away from Y/N*

Y/N: *Stands on a bar stool, waving their arms so Alcina will notice them* Hey! HhHeEY! Show us your tits!

The audience: *Cheers and whistles*

Alcina: *Blushes hard, gasps* Y/N! You knock off this vulgar behavior this instant!

Y/N: I'mMM GonNaa LIvEE ForeVverr! *Trips and falls on top of Sal* Whoa! Thanks for breaking my fall!

Sal: *Face smushed into the floor, offers a muffled reply* Don’t mention it…

Y/N: *Thinks and calls out to Alcina* Can you do Sweet Caroline?! You know, the one that goes- *Sings horribly out of tune* SwEeT CaAArOLinne!

Y/N and the audience: BUM BUM BUMMM! *Everyone continues singing the song because they’re all drunk and rowdy*

Alcina: *Looks for Miranda* Mother Miranda, I must-

Mother Miranda: *Fucking crowd surfing while belting out the song as loud as she can with everybody else*

Alcina: *Stunned*

Mother Miranda: *Takes a couple more swigs of tequila, super drunk, winks and flashes a nipple at the crowd* If you want to see the rest, that’s gonna cost you!

The audience and Y/N: *Going fucking crazy and cheering*

Y/N: *Shoving a wad of cash at Miranda* Shut up and take my money!

The way she is going to regret

Heisenberg and Y/N are shit heads

This just fits everybody’s energy in my opinion XD

RE8 ladies reacting to seeing Y/N asleep for the first time

Alcina:

I’ve mentioned this before, but I definitely think that Alcina is the mama-bear gf type. She just wants to scoop Y/N up and snuggle them as soon as she sees them, but she doesn’t want to wake them. If Y/N has a special stuffed animal, blanket, pillow, etc. that they like to sleep with, Alcina makes sure that they have it. Then she just lies down beside them and plays with their hair. Y/N really is such a cinnamon roll.

Donna:

The first time time Donna saw Y/N asleep, she was doing some laundry and ran in to grab a pile of dirty clothes to throw in the washing machine. She walked into her room and noticed Y/N sleeping on her bed. Bless her, she tried not to get nervous but anxiety’s a bitch. She immediately fears the worst and goes over to make sure Y/N’s still breathing. After a few vital signs are taken, Y/N eventually wakes up to see Donna holding a mirror under their nose to make sure they’re alive. Donna awkwardly asked if they were okay and Y/N just smiled and nodded, wanting to reassure her.

Mother Miranda:

This woman is an opportunist. Some experiments are just easier to run when the patient is asleep, after all. Yes, of course she cares about Y/N, but that’s exactly why she’s doing this, she swears! She just wants to make sure that they are sleeping efficiently and comfortably… Also, it’s not even a big deal, but she took blood and DNA samples while Y/N was asleep. She probably won’t even need them or use them, but it never hurts to be prepared, right?

Bela:

Bela can sometimes have a difficult time letting her guard down. She knows that she loves and cares about Y/N, but she’s not always comfortable sharing her feelings (She overthinks, like, everything). When she catches Y/N asleep on her bed, she feels the sudden urge to talk to them (Softly, so she doesn’t wake them up) and tell them her innermost thoughts. About halfway through Bela reciting a poem she wrote for Y/N, they wake up but decide not to let Bela know they can hear everything she’s saying. Their heart melts at the way Bela expresses her love for them.

Cassandra:

It should come as no surprise that Cass is a fan of a good prank. She literally found and kept an airhorn for just such an occasion. Yes, she thought Y/N looked absolutely adorable (She might’ve taken a few pictures), but they also didn’t ask if it was okay for them to sleep on her bed… Ofc it was, but it’s about the principle, okay? Y/N screeched and jumped about two feet in the air they were so startled by the noise. Cass has never laughed so hard.

Daniela:

Dani is not afraid of showing Y/N how much they mean to her. Definitely the most affectionate and cuddly of the sisters. She also loves to take naps. Napping together becomes a regular routine for Y/N and Dani. I hc that Dani likes to be the little spoon. It makes her feel so loved and even though she’s basically an immortal vampire, she feels safe in Y/N’s embrace. The first time Dani walked in on Y/N sleeping on her bed, she was so touched that they felt comfortable enough in her room to fall asleep. Y/N and Dani are that annoying couple who are way too into public displays of affection (but mostly private displays of affection ).

Mother Miranda adopts Y/N AU

Another stupid AU idea… Miranda adopts Y/N, a cute little kid who has been left in the village. Y/N is about 5 in this drabble. (Mother Miranda’s nice in this one, y'all)

Mother Miranda: *On a walk through the village, waving to people as she passes by, sees a tiny shivering blanket-wrapped bundle, slowly approaches it* Hello? Is somebody in there? *Gently pokes the bundle*

The bundle: *Growls*

Mother Miranda: ??? Um, hi there?

The bundle: *Huffs, Y/N unwraps themself* Keep it movin’, lady. *Y/N waves a hand dismissively at her*

Mother Miranda: *Surprised and confused* Oh! Hello. I’m Mother Miranda. What’s your name?

Y/N: *Grins* Can’t tell ya!

Mother Miranda: *Smirks, crosses her arms* And why is that?

Y/N: *A true hustler in the making* That information’s a bit pricey. The fee’s 5 bucks!

Mother Miranda: *Not that much of a dumbass, scoffs* Ha! I’m not giving you 5 dollars just so you’ll tell me your name!

Y/N: *Shrugs* Suit yourself! *Wraps up in the blanket again*

Mother Miranda: *Is not an asshole so isn’t going to leave a defenseless child all alone* Well… Is there something else you want? Why don’t you come with me and I’ll get you something to eat. I’m not going to leave you out here by yourself.

Y/N: *Holds up a hand and shakes their head* Actually, I just need to know one thing.

Mother Miranda: *Yet again confused* …Okay?

Y/N: *Suddenly has stars in their eyes* Do you know that tall cigarette lady with the big boobs and the hot daughters?! *Blushes* She’s like a Disney villain!

Mother Miranda: -_- *Groans* Unfortunately. Why-

Y/N: *Suddenly grabs Miranda’s hand* I’ll only go with you if you tell me more about her! Maybe you can even introduce me? *Gives her big puppy dog eyes*

A couple days later

Mother Miranda: Anyway, so this is Y/N. My new child! *Pats Y/N’s head* Everyone say hello.

Karl Donna and Sal: *Wave to Y/N and offer greetings*

Alcina: *Crossing her arms, looking at Miranda, pouting* Mother Miranda, this is going to sound bad, especially if taken out of context, but please tell me you didn’t pimp me out to a 5-year-old so that they would come home with you.

Mother Miranda: *Rolls her eyes* Yes! That’s exactly what happened! Weren’t you listening-

Y/N: *Interrupts Miranda, giggling like crazy* Wow! Beautiful and a genius! She’s the total package :3

Alcina: *Facepalms* Why is this how my life turned out?

Note: I definitely think Mother Miranda would keep Y/N on a kiddie leash XD

Y/N Alcina and Heisenberg get locked in a room together

Another funny idea from @grellsutcliffsworldLet’s go!

Alcina: *Frantically jiggling the door knob* Oh no! No, no, no, no. I CANNOT be trapped in this room with two of the stupidest imbeciles I’ve ever met!

Y/N: Come on, babe! At least we’ve got each other! *Makes a kissy face at her*

Alcina: *Grabs Y/N’s entire face with her hand and shoves them onto the floor* I will NOT be displaying intimacy of any kind while HE is in here! *Points at Karl*

Karl: *Picking his nose, notices Y/N and Alcina staring at him* What?! I’m practicing self-care! Donna says it’s important!

Alcina: *Groans and slides to the floor, defeated* This is my own personal hell.

Y/N: *Jumps on Alcina’s lap and snuggles into her* Maybe we can pass the time by telling stories! I’ll go first: One time, Mother Miranda made me come over to her house to clean and fix a few things. When I went to clean her bedroom, I found her personal dildo collection! She even had a HUGE-!

Alcina: *Clamps a weary hand over Y/N’s mouth* Maybe we can just have a few minutes of silence, hm?

Karl: *Covers his ears* Damn it, Y/N! You’re so stupid I bet your mom gave birth standing up!

Y/N: *Pissed* Hey! She only dropped me like five times as a baby and only once was on my head! *Seething, suddenly has a brilliant idea* Wait! We should have a yo mama joke-off!

Karl: *Claps his hands together, grinning* That’s the best idea you’ve ever had, flat-top!

Alcina: *Rolls her eyes* You two realize that you’d basically just be insulting Mother Miranda, right?

Y/N and Karl: Even better!

Karl: I got one! Yo mama’s so stupid, she stuck batteries up her butt and sang “I got the power!”

Y/N: *Laughing like a moron* Yo mama’s so ugly, when she was little she had to trick-or-treat by phone!

1 hour later

Y/N and Karl: *Have been slinging absolute soul-crushing yo mama jokes non-stop, giggling like idiots*

Alcina: *Groans, puts her face in her hands, mutters* Well, if you can’t beat ‘em…

Alcina: *Clears her throat*

Y/N and Karl: *Stop and look at her*

Alcina: Yo mama’s so classless, she’s a Marxist utopia.

Y/N: …

Karl: …

Alcina: … Too much?

Y/N and Karl: *Bust out laughing*

Alcina: *Starts laughing too*

Mother Miranda: *Comes and unlocks the door, heard everything Alcina just said, teary-eyed* So… This is what you all think of me?

Everyone: *Ignores her* FREEDOM! *Pushes her out of the way and runs out*

Mother Miranda: :’(

Note: Poor Miranda. I love you, baby <3

Y/N busts through the castle doors

Y/N: Hot damn, I sure could go for some PuSsSsYYYy! I’ve never met a vagina that I didn’t like! *Eyes widen when they see what’s going on*

The Lords and Mother Miranda: *Trying to have a nice dinner*

Karl and Sal: *Laughing their asses off*

Donna: *Disguises her chuckle as a cough* (The true brainiac of the family)

Mother Miranda: Y/N! You need to wash that filthy mouth out! *Looks over at Alcina* Honestly, what do you see in them? How could- Wait, what are you doing?!

Alcina: *Hiking her dress up* It’s dinnertime for Y/N too.

Everyone: *Screams and runs out*

Y/N: *Looks around to make sure they’re alone, holds up the text Alcina sent them, blushing* Seriously, Alci. I’m sure there are better ways of getting out of dinner with your family! Your text made it sound like you really wanted to have sex!

Alcina: *Smirks* I do. *Pulls her panties off and flops on the dining room table like a dead mackerel*

Y/N: *Crosses their arms, thinking* …Well, I guess I am pretty hungry! *Clambers on top of Alcina*

My girl Alcina is so old, y'all

When Althina wakesth up the morning… sthakin’ my head

(This is Tuna the chiweenie, by the way. I love this doggy )

When Y/N’s sitting on Alcina’s lap and she tries to squeak out a silent fart without them knowing

Alci be thinkin’ and stinkin’

Day 3 of a massive migraine… slowly losing sanity and braincells O.o