pricelessmaple:

Maurice

Ok so this is an old movie set in the old times, which may make it sound very boring, BUT I was actually not bored??? when I watched it like 3 years ago it was in 360p and sound quality was terrible but I STILL persevered because I was so invested in the lives of these pre ww1 gays. Hugh grants HAIRRR❤ hugh grants moustache . It has a HAPPY ENDING!!! This is a pretty incoherent review but just understand that it is incredibly gay and british and old and really good. brb I think I’m gonna go rewatch this now. 9/10

The living end

I literally got like half an hour through and then turned it off. It was just so boring??? I won’t rate cause that would be unfair but understand that out of what I’ve seen it would probably be quite low lmao. Maybe one day I’ll try to finish it idk

Carol

I literally dont know why I haven’t reviewed this movie yet. Uhhhhh it was pretty good. obviously the age gap is slightly weird but tbh it didn’t FEEL weird. Its not like the main girl was 17 like another movie I think we all know. Otherwise it was very beautiful how they say so much without saying anything and all that. I would be lying if I said I also wouldnt drop everything for cate blanchett. 8.5/10

Rocky horror picture show

Literally 100 minutes of the best fever dream you’ve ever had. 10/10

Imagine me and you

Imagine your basic Hugh grant british rom com but with lesbians. Idk why but watching this was actually kinda cool?? Like it felt like every other rom com, with the cliche airport ending(although not actually an airport in this) and the cheesy everything, but there were two girls as the main couple. This is what happiest season TRIED to be, or at least what everyone thought it would be. It’s just two ladies falling in love and it’s treated pretty much like a straight couple. (Ok so there is a bit of homophobia and the premise is kind of iffy, like one of them is already married??) It’s not REALLY a coming out story or at least that’s not the point of it. Not really my kind of movie though. 7/10 Piper perabo gives it an extra half point

Water lillies

this was a decent movie, definitely not the most exciting thing ever tho. It did also get a little bit weird with how much the main character (who is supposed to be like 13) had very few clothes on? It is French tho idk if that means something. Also stars Adele Haenel from portrait of a lady on fire which was a nice surprise. personally wouldn’t recommend 5.5/10 edit: JUST found out it’s written and directed by the same lady who did portrait of a lady on fire???? I can kind of see that but POALOF is a lot better

The favourite

I did not expect this movie to be a comedy? It’s loosely based on a queen from some point in history but I think it’s pretty lose. The comedy is slightly strange but it works well and I laughed a bit. Emma stone and Rachel Weisz are both competing to be the favourite of Olivia Colman who is the queen. Some people say the soundtrack is weird but tbh I don’t remember it. Definitely not for everyone and I wasn’t interested the whole time. It was decent 7/10.

Black swan

UM WHY HAVE I NOT WATCHED THIS UNTIL NOW???? I literally just finished it and OMG? There’s not tons of gay in it I’ll admit, but I classify an lgbt movie as having a main character that is gay. And technically you could say that the main character Nina (natalie Portman) is bisexual. So I’m gonna review it anyway. WHATTTTT WAS THIS MOVIE!!! bro I was hooked from the start and as it went on it literally got so much more interesting and I had so many questions but they were all answered (kind of??) So basically Natalie Portman is a ballerina and so is Mila kunis and the movie is about their ballet company preparing for a new performance of swan lake except it’s different bc the choreographer wants the black swan and the white swan to be played by the same person? I think that’s it anyways. There’s a bit of background going on as well with a former balerina and Natalie’s mum is a whole other thing. And obviously there’s a lot more going in the story (particularly with Nina) than just ballet dancing. The acting is amazing and the movie progresses so smoothly. There’s metaphors and stuff that even my dumbass understood and the way it ends is perfect. Lmao sorry for the ramble but I literally can’t get over this movie. Plz watch 10/10 I know I said the handmaiden was my favourite movie but idk man I think this might be it

Happy together

This movie was ok? I got kind of bored if I’m honest and the story was a bit random and hard to understand for me. I’m pretty sure the plot jumps back and forward in time but I couldn’t tell when everything was happening. If you do watch this be warned for graphic sex as soon as the movie starts, which I usually don’t mind but it was a bit out of place. The colouring is nice 5/10

Alex Strangelove

As a fun gay comedy this works really well. Its nice to see a story about discovering your sexuality that isn’t sad or really deep. I didn’t love it but it’s not really my kind of movie so if you like comedies then definitely watch this. 7.5/10

Elisa & Marcela

This movie is almost ALL in black and white so if I’m honest that’s already points off lmao. Its based on a true story and it’s cute and all but I had to take breaks while watching cause it was kind of boring. Maybe I was just tired. Apart from that it’s beautifully shot and the acting is very believable. 6.5/10

The handmaiden

GO AND WATCH THIS MOVIE RIGHT NOW!!!! this is my number one favourite movie ever. It’s set in 1930s Korea and that is all I’m going to tell you because there’s so many twists and I don’t want to give anything away BUT little spoilers it’s a happy, gay ending. Literally everything about it is amazing and after it ended I literally had to sit there for like 10 minutes just to take it all in. Very very explicit sex (like actually porno level) and some gore at the end, but honestly it’s so amazing otherwise that if you don’t want to watch those bits you can skip them and its still absolutley worth it. 10/10 I’m so tempted to give 11 but I won’t

Jongens (Boys)

SPORTS GAYS! This is a Dutch drama about Sieger, who runs a lot and his budding relationship with one of his teammates, Marc. The movie is innocent and gentle, and it feels very real especially because of the massive use of outdoor spaces that are literally so beautiful. Its pretty short for a movie but it does everything it needs to and didn’t feel like it was cut off short. There are a few too many shots of people just excersizing tho. very beautiful movie 8.5/10

The way he looks

Sweet is the best word to describe this movie. Its literally just so heartwarming and it made me smile. Its a coming of age type film about Leonardo who is blind and wants to have more independence away from his parents, then a new boy comes to his school… and you can guess where it goes from there lol. There are some second hand embarrassment scenes and I had to remind myself it’s just a film so I didn’t implode BUT apart from that it’s literally just a beautiful cute film that you should definitely watch 8/10

Edit 5 months later: I’m sorry but I lied all of what I said is true but I was actually pretty bored everyone loves this movie so much I tried to convince myself I loved it but I didn’t 6/10

Love, Simon

Look this isn’t my favourite movie ever, it’s probably not even in the top 25% BUT I can absolutley see why this movie was so popular when it came out. Its about Simon (Nick robinson) who is very closeted and starts emailing another anonymous gay guy at his school. There’s loads of cliches and the plot is predictable but its fun. Its just a cute gay story about being yourself and coming out and there aren’t many of those in mainstream media. Definitely watch this literally just to watch it if you haven’t already. 7.5/10

My days of mercy

Lucy (Eliot page) is anti death penalty and Mercy (Kate mara) is pro death penalty. Weird premise for a love story right? but somehow it WORKS?? I watched this movie the day it was put on Netflix and afterwards I was literally so amazed at how much I enjoyed it? if I’m remember it correctly the ending is ambiguous but hopeful. Graphic sex and obviously it’s a pretty serious movie so don’t watch if you want a Rom com lmao. 9/10

God’s own country

This movie made me smile sm at the end. Its about a Johnny a Yorkshire lad who hates working on his dad’s farm and has casual sex with random guys UNTIL Gheorghe, a guy from Romania arrives at the farm to help out, I think because all the sheep are giving birth?? The movie is so raw? if that makes any sense and despite being about gay sheep herders it IS NOT a brokeback mountain remake, theyre two pretty different films with different themes and, spoilers, gods own country has a happy ending. This is a beautiful film that is sad and happy and surprisingly emotional. Explicit sex and straight up animal births also be prepared to LITERALLY watch a man skin a lamb no joke, be warned. 9/10

The feels

Ummm this was boring as shit?? lmao. I wanted to like it but I just couldn’t. There just isn’t anything interesting about it, it’s watchable but don’t expect to have a good time. I just care so little for this movie. Its like watching a boiled egg. idk 3.5/10 cause it was better than my own private idaho.

Brokeback mountain

Ok so i KNOW this is kind of one of the most popular lgbtq movies ever made BUT I’m still gonna review it cause I want to. Brokeback mountain is SO SAD when I watched it I literally cried for like half an hour. Jack and Ennis are cowboys who fall in love on Brokeback mountain BUT Its the 1960s so it can never be, their relationship lasts for I think like 20 years? but only in secret. The movie does a great job of lowkey giving you hope only to RIP it away in the sadest way possible. I’m not really explaining it well but this movie is actually amazing and is probably one of my favourite movies fr. Its a pretty important film in terms of what it did for gay representation in media and stuff like that so it’s sort of something you should watch someday anyways but 10/10 even if Jake gylenhall doesn’t look like a real person (I can’t explain it)