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☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au jaehyun
exactly on time for the valentine boy!……..well…….
find others here: johnny|haechan|taeil|taeyong|mark|jaemin|yangyang|yuta|sicheng|chenle|kun|yukhei|doyoung

  • how you end up here, you don’t know, but you blame johnny suh because when things get weird it’s usually his fault anyway
  • johnny’s smile is a thousand and one watts - he reaches out to pass you the beat up guitar case and again, you don’t even take it by choice, it’s nudged into your hands before you can really even say a word
  • “im not joining yourband.”
  • “it’s not mine - it’s ours.”
  • jungwoo twirls a drum stick between his fingers and grins from his spot on the garage couch
  • “no johnny - we all know it’s yours.”
  • your lips thin and the only reason you don’t fling the case to the floor is because you actually like the guitar that’s inside. 
  • granted you haven’t seen it since middle school and it probably still has that horrible sticker on the back of it that you remember picking at until all the little pieces you got off were uncomfortably stuck under your nails.
  • “guys - it’s summer. we have nothing better to do.”
  • “says you, i got an engineering internship at samsung.” 
  • jungwoo chirps again and you try not to roll your eyes
  • we all know about the damn samsung internship dude.
  • “yeah - and i have to work at the family bookstore.”
  • mark lee walks in, holding as many redbulls as he can fit between his elbows, they spill out and onto the space beside jungwoo
  • you listen to mark open one and johnny groan
  • “ok you all have something to do, but we-” he motions behind him at you “don’t have anything to save us from the boredom that is about to take up two months of our youthful lives!”
  • “hey-”
  • you cut in and all three sets of eyes focus on you
  • “i have something i want to do this summer.”
  • johnny’s long figure straightens in anticipation while jungwoo cocks an eyebrow and mark gives you an encouraging smile
  • “im not going to tell you what it is, but it’s definitely not starting a band with you guys.”
  • you lean the guitar case against a nearby wall and add a half-hearted shrug
  • “sorry.”
  • the walk from johnny’s house to yours isn’t long, it takes about fifteen minutes if you’re really going slow. 
  • plus you’ve done it so many times, you basically set your body to autopilot.
  • you think about it - the thing you want to do this summer before you go away for university and home becomes a new place and a memory at the same time.
  • you’re not known for being sentimental, johnny has even gone so far as to label you as a bit ‘apathetic’ . but still you know this is your last chance to really enjoy the place you grew up in.
  • you turn the corner at the street that leads down to where you live and in the hot evening air you hear something
  • it’s the sound of a bike, the pedaling is light but the frame must be old because it creaks a little when it slows down slightly to maneuver to the left and pass you.
  • you look up and see a boy
  • brown hair still wet from the pool or a shower maybe, dimples at the corners of his smile, the two sizes too big white shirt fluttering behind him in the breeze
  • for what seems like longer than a second - you lock eyes - his match the color of autumn leaves and teddy bear fur 
  • and for some weird reason can’t stop thinking about them even well after you get back home
  • is he new in town? i’ve never seen him before?
  • finally managing to shake off the curiosity, you fish the shoebox you’ve been keeping under your bed out and open it.
  • inside there’s only three things so far: 
  • a copy of your graduation photo, a copy of johnny’s graduation photo, and the prom invite ticket that has jungwoo’s chicken scrawl on the back (he was technically your date, because johnny got proportioned by half the seniors and mark was too nervous to ask if you’d take him)
  • this is what you were talking about. this is what you want to spend summer doing.
  • you want to spend it remembering, gathering fragments of your life so far in your hometown with your bestfriends, so that when you move on you have a tangible piece of the memories
  • the reason you were keeping it a secret though was because…..even you had to admit…….this was a little much 
  • and you had built yourself a little bit of a hard shell so imagining telling the people you knew that this was your summer plan 
  • well, you could already hear johnny’s voice saying something like ‘hey, this isn’t a hallmark movie you sap and facetime exists. do you think im not gonna call you at 3 am from across the country like i do now anyway?’ 
  • you close the box and tap your fingers on the top.
  • tomorrow, i’ll start visiting all the important places.
  • your phone pings and it sound echoes through the otherwise empty library. 
  • a harsh shushing sound comes from the front desk and you quickly answer it, sliding down against one of the bookcases
  • you’d come here to see if you could find that old series you loved as a kid, the magic treehouse, it’s the books you and johnny fought over when you first met each other years ago
  • you abandon that though because poor mark sounds like he’s having a panic attack over the phone
  • “hey, you need to get over here - johnny is holding auditions for a guitarist since you said you didn’t want to do the band”
  • “ok, so what? it’s just auditions?”
  • mark’s pleading gets louder, “it’s auditions with JOHNNY - he thinks this is eurovision or something i don’t know please i can’t reign him in and jungwoo’s at his internship - i am dying here!”
  • you sigh, making it long so mark knows how annoyed you are
  • “put him on.”
  • mark’s voice drowns and johnny takes the phone from him
  • “what did i say with conspiring with them? we are shunning them for quitting on the band! what do you mean you had no other options? what do you mean my egomania is coming out? - anyway hey whats up?”
  • “stop torturing mark and all the poor kids that showed up to audition.”
  • “first of all, im not torturing anyone. that would be illegal and distasteful, im just giving my constructive criticism. second of all, if you want to give orders like that then let’s make this a fare trade off. come over and help me judge - i mean hold the auditions and then i will cease my so called ‘torturing’ ala my ‘criticizing’.”
  • you huff - fine, it’s one day out of the whole summer.
  • “ok. but you better have snacks.”
  • “do you think i wouldn’t provide refreshments? what kind of monster do you think i am?”
  • there’s more people than you expect showing up to audition for this band. half of them are just there to sweet talk johnny or mark,  but the others are all just. bad. 
  • you never knew how bad someone butcher playing an instrument, let alone a guitar, but you’ve had that eye opening experience today
  • “how many people left?”
  • you mutter, face first into your palms and looking up with happiness when mark says only one!
  • “hey, im jung jaehyun.”
  • you turn and see the boy from the bike, the one with the softest eyes you’ve ever seen, standing in the entry to johnny’s garage
  • he’s carrying his own guitar case - black leather and well worn but loved
  • “well jaehyun dude, i hope you can at least play the damn thing because i feel like no one in this town can!”
  • johnny groans and you straighten up a little as jaehyun comes closer
  • he sets himself up and you feel something inside your stomach turn when he bends down and you see a bit of the tanned skin of his back
  • “im not amazing, but i can play some of the classics.”
  • “wonderwall?” mark asks and johnny snips at him as you try to think of something to say, but suddenly….your brain is fuzzy
  • “play anything!” 
  • so jaehyun does, he plays, and he even sings and the fuzziness in your brain turns to white noise and the little drop in your stomach is a whole bundle of butterflies
  • you barely realize the johnny is already befriending jaehyun and mark is staring at him with those big, impressed eyes
  • when you get up and jaehyun smiles at you
  • “so what do you play?”
  • johnny throws an arm around your shoulder older brother style and rolls his eyes before you get a word in
  • “you’re actually taking their spot because they’re too busy to be in the band.”
  • something seems to cast a sad shadow over jaehyun’s features - “oh, you’re not going to play with us?”
  • words float through your head, none of which you can grasp onto, so you just shake it instead and let johnny ramble on about your so called betrayal
  • you look at your phone and of course it’s nearing ten and there’s no way you can go to any of the other places on your list so you motion to mark that you’re going to head home
  • “oh - i have to go too.”
  • jaehyun slings his guitar case over his shoulder, “but ill come by tomorrow for practice?”
  • johnny shoots him a big grin and then haggles all the social media jaehyun has out of him
  • you don’t know why you just don’t start walking - but somehow you end up leaving with jaehyun, making that left turn where you first passed each other
  • “do you live on this street?”
  • you jump a little as you nod, “yeah - i think i actually saw you yesterday. you were on your bike so you probably didn’t notice me.”
  • there’s a polite distance between you two, but jaehyun is smiling when he answers
  • “oh no, i definitely noticed you.”
  • you end up thinking about those words the same way you couldn’t stop thinking about his eyes 
  • except this time, instead of it lasting a day, the thought lasts nearly two and a half weeks
  • it seems jaehyun is doing a good job fitting in with your friends, considering you don’t get anymore calls from mark 
  • and you actually start to make progress on your summer project
  • you manage to get some ticket stubs from old movies, an old science project you did that’s still hanging on the walls of the highschool (open for summer classes), and pressed flowers from ontop of a hill where you almost break your elbow back when you were a freshman
  • you’re plunging yourself into your past, but weirdly enough every now and then you’ll remember that 
  • oh no, i definitely noticed you
  • the six little words make you feel giddier than whatever memento you’re seeking out to tuck into your shoebox
  • you try to tell yourself it’s just because jaehyun is new - he’s new and the memory of him isn’t old enough to try and find anything to represent him by 
  • and he kind of represents everything you’re nervous about - new places, new people, new friendships …… the prospect of a new love
  • love? 
  • you look up at the sky as you swing back and forth on the playground you’ve come to collect something from for your memory box 
  • that’s ridiculous. i’ve had one conversation with him!
  • you swing your legs back and forth, slowing down and you think twice about jumping off when suddenly you feels someone gently push your back
  • the swing goes a little higher and you turn your head in surprise to see
  • “j-jaehyun?”
  • he smiles and his dimples greet you before he does
  • “i saw you on my way back from johnny’s.”
  • he gives you another soft push and you hear that fuzzy noise that always turns the gears in your brain when you try to say something around him
  • “is - is johnny being nice?”
  • is all you can muster and jaehyun laughs, the sound melodic but low, just the way the baritone of his voice is when he sang
  • “very nice, but he is a lot to handle sometimes.”
  • you kick your legs down and dig your heels into the grass a little, jaehyun grabs the two chains of the swings to help you stop it
  • when you turn you notice his bike is laying a couple of feet away and so is his guitar
  • “what about the band stuff?”
  • “johnny is trying to write songs and stuff, but actually mark is the one that i think has the talent for it.”
  • you can’t help but feel the corner of your mouth lift up a little, he already knows the two of them pretty well.
  • “what about you - do you write songs or music?”
  • jaehyun lifts his bike back up and you take the guitar case to help him
  • before you know it - you and him are walking side by side again 
  • “a little, but it’s more about playing the guitar for me. that’s the part that makes me happy.”
  • you play with your fingers behind your back, old nervous habits rising to the surface
  • “by the way - why did you not want to be part of the band? johnny said you were busy with something but you didn’t say what.”
  • you stop 
  • i should lie, make something up.
  • jaehyun stops too and the sounds of the bike wheels and footsteps float off into the air
  • but for some reason, i don’t want to lie. not to him.
  • “im……leaving after the summer, going to school in another place. so im spending my summer kind of…..im kind of cataloging this place. this town. i’m doing the whole put your memories in a shoebox thing which is so-”
  • “awesome! i think it’s awesome that you want a part of your home with you, sometimes people are way too excited to get away from their roots.”
  • you look at jaehyun, who returns the look with a comforting warmth you’ve never experienced before.
  • it’s a different comfort than the one you get from your friends or your family, it makes your heart beat flutter - slow for a second, then so fast you think your body can’t keep up
  • he starts walking again and you do too
  • the silence isn’t weird. it’s a conversation in it’s own way between your two bodies.
  • when you get to your house - you look at jaehyun again and you have two thoughts
  • one is that you should kiss him. because he looks so…..kissable.
  • the second, the one you ultimately choose, is to widen your eyes and go:
  • “promise you won’t tell the others about it though, they would not let me live it down.”
  • jaehyun laughs and hooks his pinkie with yours - his skin soft under the setting sun - “i promise.”
  • and after being caught up in thinking about jaehyun’s eyes, or the way he speaks, you find yourself in the same repeating cycle again
  • this time. it’s your regret. 
  • you should have chose option one, because it’s looking like another opportunity to kiss jung jaehyun is not coming any time soon.
  • and like the two times before, you throw yourself into your summer project to try and not think about it 
  • (although you do, multiple times throughout the day, at one point blushing at the image of what could have happened if you DID kiss him and then getting snapped at by the angry man at the local deli)
  • another couple of weeks pass and you swing by johnny’s because it’s a location on your summer memory list and also….
  • you are curious about how the band is going …
  • and you kind of a little want to see jaehyun again……
  • you arrive and hear jungwoo’s voice to your surprise, followed by the sound of drums and johnny’s sharp “stop, stop, STOP!”
  • “jungwoo, what is going on - did working at samsung make you into a robot who can only produce code and not drum to save his life?”
  • “what do you know about drumming johnny? or coding? or anything in general?”
  • “hey watch the attitude, you’re embarrassing me in front of jaehyun.”
  • jungwoo snorts and you try to hide your own laugh but everyone turns to you just in time for you to hiccup it back
  • “ah - the traitor is here!” 
  • johnny sings and jaehyun gives him a soft elbow to the ribs
  • “what’s up?” 
  • mark smiles from his place at the keyboard and you cross your arms
  • “nothing, hows it going - book any shows? write an album yet?”
  • “actually, we did book a gig for your information”
  • johnny waltz his way from the microphone and to a stack of flyers from his couch
  • he hands you one and this time you do burst out into laughter
  • the flyer, pink and way over the top, is an invitation to johnny’s end of the summer party
  • well it’s actually his going away party his parents have planned for him, since he’s also leaving for school
  • “johnny - you didn’t book a gig. you’re playing your own party.”
  • “the parents are shelling out twenty dollars to each of us so money makes it a gig.”
  • you look at jaehyun who secretly rolls his eyes
  • “sure, sure. can i keep one of these?” 
  • you fold the flyer and slip it into your pocket, this will make a good addition to the shoebox
  • “oh are you going to put it in-”
  • jaehyun starts and you rush over, hand flying over his mouth as the three other people in the garage stare
  • “going to put it in……the trash. yes. going to throw it right out because really johnny did you use paint-”
  • johnny flips you off in the kindest, best friend way possible
  • you let go of jaehyun and throw him a look that he mouths an apology too
  • somehow, instead of leaving, you end up staying and listening to them practice
  • you consider it a break from your project and the day is filled with what you’d expect from all of them, laughter and jokes and banter that is only ok between the closest of people
  • when they finally finish practice and jungwoo and mark accept a gracious ride home from mr. suh 
  • you say you’ll be off too and jaehyun trots up right behind you, “ill walk with you.”
  • this time, you hear less of the fuzz in your head and can actually keep up a decent conversation without staring at jaehyun’s lips
  • you feel closer because of the time you spent today and you almost walk past your house until jaehyun points to the porch
  • “oh by the way. can i see what you have in the shoebox?”
  • you look over your shoulder at him, “like right now?”
  • he gives a casual shrug
  • “is that ok?”
  • and now jung jaehyun is standing in your room. well he’s standing in it and then he’s sitting on your bed and rummaging through some of the most personal memories you have.
  • his long fingers pulling out ticket stubs or notes you passed in class
  • he chuckles at the graduation photo of johnny and dangles yours over your head when he refuses to give it back 
  • you tackle him for it and he falls down against your sheets and you make the worst (or arguably best) mistake of your life
  • when you straddle his hips and rich out to grab it
  • only to look down and see him splayed open like the pages of a beautiful book
  • and you remember your regret
  • it makes your head spin, but you watch in slow motion as the photo falls from between his fingers and you lean down to catch it, but jaehyun presses up and catches your mouth with his.
  • it’s sloppy, awkward - but only for the first few seconds - until you can both adjust yourselves from your position and do it right and then it is 
  • astonishing
  • because it feels like you’re kissing someone you’ve been kissing for years. decades. millennia’s. eons. 
  • it feels like you and jaehyun have been doing this since the big bang.
  • since humans first came to exist. 
  • since, gosh you don’t know, since pangea freaking broke apart.
  • you make out for so long that you lose track of time and it gets late to the point where the darkness of the summer almost makes you ask him to stay over
  • but jaehyun is just so mannerly that he slips out the back door of your house with a final kiss and a promise to call
  • which he follows up on earlier than you expect, showing up on your doorstep to take you out for breakfast
  • only to end up with you two back in your room an hour later, kissing again, and again, and with more hands and less of his shirt or yours.
  • the only thing that unglues you from him is his phone ringing for what must be the tenth time
  • “it’s johnny”
  • you breath against jaehyun’s neck finally
  • “how do you know?”
  • “only he calls ten times in a row.”
  • and like your summer project, you don’t tell your friends about what’s going on between you two
  • jaehyun says it’s kind of hard to hide the obvious evidence on his body - but you tell him to say it was your other neighbor, or someone from another town
  • jaehyun agrees just because you pull the doe eye trick on him and he really is learning he can’t say no to that or to you in most situations
  • but everytime before and after band practice - he’s with you
  • sometimes he joins you on your little visits to the places still on your lists
  • when you tell him the sentimental value behind them, you get a little fidgety because being vulnerable is hard 
  • but jaehyun listens and he says that each memory of yours he gets to watch you relive, helps him learn something about you
  • you don’t say it out loud - but hearing that makes you want to cry and kiss him and cry again 
  • an other times, you two don’t do anything heartwarming or special, you just roll around with him, tangled up in one until he has to go
  • with each day, summer comes closer to 
  • and end but you fall deeper into each other at a pace that might be alarming if it was any other two humans but the both you
  • and before you know it - it’s the day of johnny’s end of summer slash going away party 
  • jaehyun is supposed to be there from like nine in the morning but he stops at your place before he bikes over
  • kissing your forehead he drops something in your palm
  • you open it to see his guitar pick 
  • “won’t you need this for when you play?”
  • “i’m using my backup. i just thought you might want to put that one in your shoebox……..since it could remind you of me……”
  • he flushes and you bite back your lip, part of you is happy because he’s just so cute it isn’t fair but the other is coming to the daunting idea that 
  • soon enough - im leaving too, will jaehyun just be another memory to me?
  • instead of dwelling on it, you peck him again and ask, 
  • “ill see you at the party?”
  • the party is most definitely a johnny suh party
  • the food is amazing, everyone on the planet is invited, and johnny is wearing something so bright it beats out the sun
  • when you arrive, his mother spends half an hour asking you to take care of him when he finally leaves and you don’t remind her that you’re going to two different places
  • you don’t see jaehyun or mark or jungwoo around - you assume they’re practicing somewhere for the performance while johnny is juggling both front lead singer and host
  • the party is fun - it really is - but the words “going away” somehow still make you a little sick
  • you’re about to escape to somewhere a little quieter, when you hear someone tap the mic on the makeshift stage in johnny’s backyard
  • you see him - and the rest of the band - gather on as johnny introduces them and shouts excitedly that this song they’re going to perform, written by keyboardist mark, is all about new beginnings!
  • jaehyun finds you in the crowd, a secret little smile on his lips before the music starts and to your surprise - and probably everyone elses - they actually do pretty good
  • the lyrics are so very mark, but johnny brings a flare to the way he sings it
  • jungwoo seems to have remembered how much he adores drumming again and the way jaehyun looks playing guitar is so enticing that you can’t help but feel a little pride in the fact that you’ve been tasting all of that for most of the summer
  • the sick feeling in your stomach turns into excitement which turns into just pure enjoyment as you watch your friends and your boyfriend up there having fun
  • when it’s over and they hop down to mingle back into the rest of the party, you really can’t help yourself and throw your arms around jaehyun
  • you kiss him - which earns a gasp from mark, a half smirk from jungwoo, and a loud clearing of his throat from johnny
  • you and jaehyun admit what’s been going on and when johnny just whistles you ask him if he’s not mad
  • “even if i was mad, you would still keep liking each other right - so what’s the point?” 
  • you hug johnny, and mark, and jungwoo, and like nothing has changed you all fall back into the swing of it
  • the comfort of being around each other
  • when you five are the last people in johnny’s messy background you finally decide to tell them all about your summer project
  • “i knew you’d all say it was lame so i-”
  • “hey hey hey - it isn’t lame. it’s not what i expect but i get why you’d want to do it.”
  • johnny pats your shoulder and you feel jaehyun’s hand on the small of your back
  • it’s the kind of moment you want to never end. 
  • really, you just want this summer to never end.
  • but when it does - when the day comes for the temperature to drop and for you to be on your way to a new place
  • you feel the sadness come in a big wave
  • johnny, mark, jungwoo, and jaehyun all come to say goodbye and you hold the shoebox in your hands - now heavy and filled to the brim with all your memories
  • before you say it though, each of them adds something
  • jungwoo drops his samsung internship ID into it
  • mark places the paper he wrote the draft of the lyrics to the song they performed at the party into it
  • and johnny chucks a burned CD version of it into the mix
  • finally, turning to jaehyun, you take in a deep breath
  • “i know the distance will be big so if you want to break up and-”
  • he kisses you before you can finish your sentence and slips a small box that you don’t open until you’re already in your new dorm
  • inside is a small bracelet, engraved on the inside are the words
  • “i definitely noticed you. it was love at first sight”
  • years later - jaehyun says those words again
  • as he’s reading his vows 
  • and you’re feeling the fuzziness, the butterflies, the comforting warmth, everything like a tsunami of all the things that are you and jaehyun
  • and when johnny shows up to present the rings to you two
  • they’re in that old shoebox 
  • two little bands at the bottom of all those memories
  • at the reception, you lean over and whisper to your now husband
  • “where did you find that old thing by the way?”
  • jaehyun nuzzles his lips against the cusp of your ear as you watch jungwoo and mark make fools of themselves on the dance floor 
  • “under the bed, where you put everything you care about.”

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au doyoung
late birthday post for mr. kim! i am never on time for these posts, apologies. 
find others here: johnny|haechan|taeil|taeyong|mark|jaemin|yangyang|yuta|sicheng|chenle|kun | yukhei

  • a sinking feeling has you rooted to the floor. staring at the lock of your front door as someone knocks politely over and over again.
  • “what are you doing?”
  • your mother’s voice gusts past you like a breeze, she leans over your frozen figure and turns the knob.
  • you step back to avoid being hit by the door and dread the light that washes over your mothers face
  • “doyoung! come in!”
  • he steps through and all you catch is a bit of side profile, hidden behind the gigantic plant he’s holding
  • “oh! that’s the orchid your mother was just up in a fit about? come here sweetie, place it on the kitchen table -”
  • his footsteps echo and you shrink a little, he didn’t even look at me. 
  • you’re thankful for your mothers insolent obsession with being a good host and trudge your way back to your room
  • doyoung is in your house. 
  • which is weird, the first time he was in your house - you knew, obviously, but he was uninvited. your mother didn’t welcome him through the door.
  • now - for the past month - after both his mother and yours had come to a unbreakable bond over their indoor houseplants 
  • doyoung has very much been a presence, an invited presence, a presence everyone but you seemed to be delighted about
  • “he’s such a nice boy, he’s spending his summers tutoring younger kids and i see him biking all around town.”
  • your mother gushes almost every time at dinner after doyoung leaves - delivering whatever ailing plant his mother has sent to yours to fix and play botanist with
  • you pick at your food
  • yeah, he’s a nice boy. that’s what makes this all so much worse.
  • now - you’re laying on your sheets with your hand on your stomach and staring up at the wall thinking very much the same thought.
  • he’s so nice, and so perfect, and everything anyone ever dreams of. why am i such an idiot for not wanting that?
  • you drum your fingers and again spiral back into the memory that keeps itself wedged between you and him like a piece of food that’s stuck so sternly between teeth, no pushing at it with your tongue helps.
  • summer starts in ten days, officially you know - by the university calendar.you’re supposed to be focusing on a final paper for some elective politics class you took, but you’re not. you’re staring at the back of doyoung’s neck. he sits in front of you for most lectures.
  • “hey, do you know anything about this military-first politics and nuclear armament essay prompt the professor gave us?”
  • doyoung turns slowly, blinking at you from behind his thin-wired classes, “yeah - it’s been the topic of discussion and reading for like a week.”
  • you know you sound kind of stupid to even ask - but you will admit, politics isn’t your thing and it seems to really be doyoungs - so you smile, with a please pity me kind of look in your eye. doyoung sighs, but he gets up and slides into the seat beside you - opening up the half blank word document on your laptop.
  • that’s it. that’s all it was going to be. doyoung helping you skid by, so that your summer isn’t ruined by a shitty grade. 
  • but that’s not what happens. at all. 
  • doyoung instead spends a lot of time helping you write a good enough paper to pull through a B-. 
  • that means a lot of alone time in the library, in study hall, in the empty halls of the school buildings where classes have ended and no one is around.
  • it’s a lot of being shoulder to shoulder with him, realizing how nice he always smells - how long his fingers are when they type - how he doesn’t have a significant other because no one except his friends ever end up interrupting you.
  • it’s the day after you get your grades for the semester, something about getting the paper back sparks a fire in you
  • you scope doyoung out at the coffeeshop and exclaim that you and him did it!
  • a couple of heads whip around, did it?, you quickly add some mumbling about the paper.
  • doyoung laughs, it’s the first time you’ve heard the genuine sound, because most of the time he just makes a half-sided smirk or chuckle.
  • you buy him an iced latte as repayment and somehow end up walking out of there with side by side.
  • doyoung asks if you live near by if you don’t dorm, you say you do. he does too. that’s weird - you’ve never seen him around the neighborhood.
  • after that you pretend it’s a blur. because truth be told it isn’t.
  • you and doyoung are going to be taking the same train anyway, why not take it together. you and doyoung are going to know the same little places around town, why not talk about them.
  • why not? why not? why not? 
  • why not invite him inside when you’re back in your hometown, why not lead him up to your room just so he can see it and why not kiss him when he leans over you.
  • people your age do it all the time, they hookup. that’s the only answer to that stupid hanging ‘why not?’
  • so when you felt doyoung’s fingers graze down your side and he’d clumsily gotten his glasses off just in time for you to pull his shirt up over his head 
  • you were convinced it meant nothing. you were convinced he thought the same.
  • then it all happens and you can’t take it back. 
  • especially not the part where you’re laying on your bed, just like you are now, waiting for doyoung to start gathering his things and instead a hand loops around your sweaty waist.
  • “aren’t you going to leave?”
  • the words blurt out of your mouth before you even think about it. 
  • the tension that stalled in the room had been so horrible you swore you’d felt it seep into every pore, damn near trickling itself down the walls.
  • doyoung had darkened, pulled himself away from you, and disappeared before you could string together your next thought.
  • part of you had been relieved, the other part felt like the biggest asshole on the planet.
  • you were just grateful the rest of the summer could easily be passed by keeping away from each other - until your mother had found her new best friend.
  • downstairs you can hear doyoung shuffling around with your mothers plants, you can’t make out what they’re saying, but you’re sure your mother is inviting him to stay and eat with you. asking doyoung about his amazing future plans to become a lawyer. enthralled by everything he is as a child and that you, most likely, are not.
  • when he finally leaves and the commotions die down you can’t get up
  • this is the most confusing moment. 
  • not the whole ignoring each other when he pops over, not the whole reliving the past from just a glimpse. 
  • it’s why - when it happened, you had been so content with it just staying nothing - you had been the one to make that decision for the both of you
  • yet
  • why does it seem like you’re wallowing in it, clinging to it, imaging it all over
  • every time he comes over
  • because you didn’t just want a hook-up. you wanted doyoung and were playing it off because having a crush on him isn’t worth it right?
  • your mind coils itself through a storm
  • you thought he only wanted to sleep with you too, because the thought of someone as good as doyoung liking you just doesn’t make sense?
  • despite the summer heat, you feel cold
  • you’re not good enough to actually be liked, to be the person doyoung chooses for something more than just your-
  • your phone rings and you sit up so fast it gives you a headache, you feel around and bring it to your ear without checking the number
  • “hello?”
  • “our mothers are trying to set us up on a date.”
  • you want to be anywhere in the world, but here. 
  • doyoung’s blank expression doesn’t let you know if he feels the same, but the way he won’t get in at least eight feet of you is telling enough.
  • you’re in his backyard, well technically you’re in his neighbors backyard, because he doesn’t want to be visible behind the hedges
  • rather be caught dead than be next to me, right? 
  • you shrill at yourself and try to bury the wince you make internally
  • “i think you should just tell them you have another boyfriend.”
  • “i can’t lie to my mother.”
  • you start and doyoung watches you chew on your lower lip and retreat defensively a step back
  • “why not?”
  • “she’s noisy - she’ll find out. she’ll insist until i die to meet this ‘other boyfriend’. plus i’m not a good liar.”
  • “really? could have fooled me.”
  • doyoung straightens himself as he says that, eyes unblinking behind the frames of his glasses
  • i probably deserve that. well actually-
  • “doyoung, i never promised you anything when we-”
  • the words wilt and doyoung suddenly looks over his shoulder.
  • “you’re right, you never promised me anything. im the one who was a fool for ever thinking it was something.”
  • you look at the grass. 
  • you wonder, if you had not said that one sentence - aren’t you going to leave - would this summer be different?
  • would you and doyoung be spending every second together, holding each other at the beach? kissing under the fireworks? sharing ice-cream and diving into pools filled of water and your laughter?
  • the thought blooms something in your chest
  • i wish - i wish it was that.
  • “you say i should lie, but you’re pretty good at it too doyoung.”
  • “excuse me?”
  • “it’s not like you - it’s not like you really wanted it to be anything more than it was.”
  • you think the grass is going to burst into flames with how hard you’re concentrating on it.
  • “what, you’re telling me-” you swallow “you’re telling me you actually wanted to be with me after? our mothers are trying to get us to go on a date and you called me out here just to avoidthat.”
  • he leans forward
  • “if you are trying to make me the only guilty party here-”
  • he’s closer and you feel your voice shake a little, but you try to push to the end of your thought.
  • “im not, you never made any effort to make it seem like you had any genuine emotion so am i so wrong for just assuming it was just se-”
  • his hands, large and gentle, manage to find your shoulders and doyoung presses his lips to yours 
  • you stiffen from the external shock, but then relax under the light grip
  • his breath smells sweet, like he’s been chewing bubblegum, he’s wearing the same cologne he does at university
  • “i don’t just sleep with people.” 
  • he whispers against your mouth
  • “nothing against it, but i don’t think there’s a point to sharing something intimate with someone who i don’t want in every possible way.”
  • when you and doyoung agree to go on a date - both your mothers lose it. they’re convinced you’re soulmates.
  • although you and doyoung both agree they’re thinking way too far ahead in the future - it doesn’t mask the fact that the attraction that ends up forming between you two is undeniable
  • doyoung is so determined and intently goal orientated that you would think there isn’t the capacity to have fun in one bone in his body, but that’s not true
  • when he’s comfortable, he’s charming and full of humor - he makes you double over with laughter more than you could have imagined
  • and you aren’t as spacey and shy as doyoung might have assumed either, you have a competitive streak and you make doyoung feel like this is the summer of his life
  • the summer of his life that someone could probably make a decent coming of age film out of
  • he brings it up after you two exit a movie that was just about the same topic and you look down at your hands intertwined and shake your head
  • “no they’d never cast the right people to play us.”
  • doyoung sees the reflection of the milky way in your eyes, but he doesn’t say it
  • “no one on this planet is like you.”
  • he returns this sentiment with a small kiss that bumps this glasses against the bridge of your nose.
  • you get nervous sometimes when you think about how the summer started, it’s not like you’re living in the middle ages where intimacy is a sin before eternal commitment or anything
  • no you just get nervous because the reason you ever even made that situation as bad as it was, was because of your insecurity
  • does doyoung actually like me? did two weeks of being together at school make him realize something about me is worth it?
  • you can’t ask him that - even though sometimes you want to, so you can explain why you hadn’t just rolled over and nuzzled yourself into the dip of his chest
  • much like you do now - you fit so perfectly right between his arms
  • instead it sometimes gnaws at you until doyoung is cleaning his glasses over your sink and you’re sitting in the bathtub looking at him
  • your parents are ironically over at doyoungs for some wine party or whatever and although your mothers are in awe about you two being “a cute lil couple” 
  • they see that - cute, part of it makes you snort. you and doyoung sometimes act more mature than they do.
  • “i always knew you were staring at me in lecture.” he starts and a little smirk pulls at his long lips
  • you flick some of the water at him and he leans against the counter
  • he doesn’t like baths, he prefers showers, but he still stays in the room with you when you take them 
  • “i wasn’t staring at you.”
  • “you were staring at the back of my neck.”
  • you look away because fair, not like he spends a lot of time looking away from the professor.
  • “so i knew you liked me, or something about me. that’s why it hurt.”
  • “when we-”
  • “yes and i like being logical, so not having a real answer for why that all happened like it did still haunts me.”
  • he tilts his head and you see the line of his thin collarbones through his shirt
  • “i thought you’d say it first.”
  • he blinks
  • “i thought you’d say something like, that was cool. ill see you at uni come fall. and then leave. so i mean, i didn’t even say go leave - i asked, aren’t you going to leave?”
  • doyoung is smart so he gets what you’re saying in the most roundabout way possible
  • he walks over and squats down, leans over the ridge of the bath to kiss you and doesn’t complain when you bring your soapy hands up to cradle his neck
  • “im sorry i did leave, i should have just said what i felt right there.” 
  • he mutters and you nod. you should have said it too.
  • when you and doyoung graduate and he goes on to law school and you start working, you almost break up - twice - because of the stress
  • but somehow neither of you can ever ask the other one
  • aren’t you going to leave?
  • because neither of you ever really wants to.
  • so you don’t, you stay through all the hardships, through every argument and bump in the road. 
  • you stay, you choose to stay and so does he and you might not even fall asleep next to each other on some days but the heat of the person you love is always there.
  • and then doyoung gets his first big promotion at his job, runs all the way home with the news and ends up breathing hard and talking nonsense to you in your shared kitchen
  • “you need a shower.”
  • you say, wiping the sweat from his forehead as he shakes his head, no. he needs a bath.
  • you lean back against his chest, stronger and broader as he’s aged. 
  • he looks down at you and even the eyebags that have gotten darker with all that work he does don’t do anything to make him less attractive
  • you peck his chin, because it’s what you can reach.
  • “if we sit here any longer we’re going to prune.”
  • “are you going to be the first one to leave?”
  • he asks and you shake your head. 
  • you’ll sit here forever if that’s what it takes.
  • on the counter of the bathroom, there’s one of the houseplants your mothers keeps shipping to you. 
  • you don’t notice that it’s the same orchid that doyoung carried into your house all those years ago, when you thought he hadn’t even looked at you when your mother opened the door.
  • he curls a strand of your wet hair around his finger.
  • he had looked at you, quickly, but he had done it. 
  • even half covered by orchid leaves, you’d made his mouth dry. 
  • “no seriously though - we will prune.”
  • “i’ll get up if you get up?”
  • i’ll never leave, the only way i’ll leave is if it means im taking you with me. 

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au yukhei 
happy (not tooooo late at all, for a change lol) birthday yukhei!~
find others here: johnny|haechan|taeil|taeyong|mark|jaemin|yangyang|yuta|sicheng|chenle |kun

  • “that’s the worst sound i have ever heard in my life.”
  • you stand up too fast from behind the counter and bump your head with an ouch before looking to see what sicheng is complaining about now
  • outside the window of the cafe, you see a group of laughing boys and the bright, loud dirt bikes they’ve started riding around town
  • the sound of the engines and skidding tires managing to make their way through the windows
  • you wipe your hand on the front of your uniform’s apron and shrug
  • “i think they’re kind of cool.”
  • sicheng swivels around on the creaky bar stool, a script open halfway through is laying beside his iced-coffee
  • “extreme sports is just the polite way to say hey, this shit will get you killed”
  • you roll your eyes and check the clock that hangs above the display of baked goods and menu - almost eight, so almost time to close
  • you point it out to sicheng who packs his things up, you go over to help an elderly regular clean up their table and when the customer leaves you tell sicheng he doesn’t have to wait up for you
  • he throws his bag over his shoulder and looks over his shoulder at the parked dirt bikes 
  • “hey, if one of them bothers you when you’re locking up just call me.”
  • “im pretty sure they’re not even going to notice me.”
  • sicheng still frets as he slips out of the door
  • you hum as you fall into your end of the day routine. you’ve been working here part-time through university, but with summer coming around, you’ve come on full-time
  • it’s a lot of work for one person, but the boss trusts you like their own children, and you actually enjoy having the quiet responsibility of locking up
  • you sweep the floor, put away all of the left over food and milk in the fridge, check the register and print-out the sales for the day
  • your last task is to close all of the blinds, the cafe always has them up in the summer, the tops open to let a slight breeze in when it coasts by
  • as you go through each them, you finally reach the last one that faces directly out of the front of the cafe. out onto sidewalk across.
  • it’s right in front of the intersection where the sidewalk turns into the boardwalk, and there’s a bike rack and some parking spots
  • the dirt bikes have all been left there, tires soiled with wear and sand
  • beside one of the bikes, a sleek red bodied one with various silver accents, stands a lone figure
  • in the summer heat, he’s still got leather gloves on that clutch the matching colored helmet in one hand, long jeans and lace up heavy boots 
  • the only breathable part of his outfit is the white tank top that clings to the obviously toned lines of his upper body
  • a silver chain hangs around his neck, the links look so small on his overall broad figure, but they still shine against his sun kissed skin
  • he chews on the end of a toothpick and staring -
  • you step back slightly - he’s staring right at you
  • something in your stomach feels off, the crossing wires of concern and shock tell you to enter a state of heightened awareness
  • scurrying back to your work, you tell yourself you are just seeing things. you should listen to sicheng, finish quickly and hurry home.
  • the summer sun is quietly being pushed out by the summer moon by the time you lock the front door of the cafe and drop the keys into your bag
  • you turn around and whisper a small - shit! - when the figure from before is still there
  • he’s probably waiting for his friends, but sicheng was all wound up about them so now i am to- oh wait i think he’s coming over here!
  • and you’re right, the figure looks both ways before he crosses the street and jogs easily up to you
  • suddenly your hand itches to fish those keys out of your bag because what can a guy (a very handsome guy, up close) on a dirt bike have to do with you-
  • “hi - do you work in the cafe?”
  • he asks, voice deeper than you expect, his eyes are large and the color of autumn chestnuts
  • “um-yes?”
  • he sees the way your shoulders are tensed and he immediately retracts himself a step backwards
  • he puts his hands up, helmet still in his right, “oh right - sorry to scare you, i was just asking because ive seen you around-” 
  • something like a flush coats under his cheeks
  • “wait - that sounds weird too, i just meant to say that i think you’re - that i wanted to know your name is all….”
  • you blink, your shoulders don’t relax completely, but you can tell there isn’t any bad intent coming from him
  • “well, what’s your name first.”
  • he stands up taller and grins, white teeth almost blinding in the dusk
  • “wong yukhei! i came here for the summer with some of my buddies.”
  • he tilts his head toward the bikes and you nod, saying only your first name - sichengs cautiousness seeping into your own
  • yukhei repeats it, with an almost a bit of a goofyness in his smile when he does
  • “well - ill see you around then?”
  • you aren’t sure what to make of the situation, so you just shrug - “maybe?” - he seems satisified with this answer though, and crosses back to his bike
  • you don’t know why, but you feel embarrassed just standing there, so you shuffle your feet and start your walk home
  • at some point you turn to look over your shoulder, right at the corner that you have to take, but when you do - yukhei and his bike are gone
  • “really? see, this is why i should stay while you lock up.”
  • sicheng’s eyebrow twitches as you finish telling him what happened
  • it’s the next day, and it’s noon - right when the days get the hottest and most of the cafe’s customers are just coming in for the free air conditioning
  • “i don’t think he’s dangerous, i think he just wanted to say hi.”
  • you answer, fixing what must be the twentieth order for shaved ice-cream
  • the slices of strawberry fall gently onto the heap, and you place two pairs of the forks beside the dish
  • carrying it carefully to the pick up counter, you call out the order number and watch as a young couple - still dressed in their beach attire - comes up together, unable to break apart for even a second
  • you smile at them and return to sicheng, taking his empty glass and turning to fill it up with ice 
  • “you can think he’s not dangerous, but any idiot who owns a death trap like a dirtbike-”
  • “sicheng, it’s like a normal bike but with an engine. it’s like a car but without the-”
  • “thesafety, without the safety. really - i didn’t think you’d be the type to be into bad guys like that.”
  • you make a pfft sound with your lips, filling the glass with water and setting it down beside him
  • “first off, im not into anyone - i talked to him once. and just because they like bikes, doesn’t make them bad - you’ve been reading too many of those cliché scripts.”
  • sicheng makes his own sound of disapproval, but takes the drink you offer and brings the straw to his lips
  • you get busy with other customers, at some point kun and xiaojun turn up and distract sicheng
  • the whole time you work, something in you keeps making you stop to look out of the window
  • last night, the row of bikes had been there, but now they’re gone - maybe they’re not coming into town tonight?
  • you reprimand yourself every time you do look, because really it is just like you said to sicheng - yukhei was just saying hi. 
  • finally it’s time for you to close the cafe again
  • the only reason sicheng doesn’t stay is because kun drags him somewhere else and if there’s anyone more stubborn than sicheng, it’s the elder of the pair
  • you take your time - calling the boss to let him know you’re leaving 
  • “did that group of loud boys wreck havoc again?”
  • “group of boys?”
  • “the ones on those bikes, not motorcycles the other ones-”
  • your hand gets a little sweaty as it holds the phone
  • “no, they didn’t come around today.”
  • “good. be safe going home.”
  • you think about the conversation as you subconsciously start walking after you lockup 
  • there’s a way to get home that’s faster, and much safer, but there’s a longer way too - that has you walk most of the boardwalk
  • really, it’s still safe - because of summer the beach is as bright as a movie screen till midnight - but you avoid it for the crowd and the noise
  • your feet urge you to turn at your usual corner, but you don’t, you make way to the little stairs that lead from the sidewalk and onto the old wooden boardwalk
  • there are lots of people still about, packing their things up from their time at the beach or coming to stroll by the waves when the sand isn’t burning under their feet
  • groups of friends, smiling strangers, couples with kids or without 
  • everyone is enjoying their summer, and you almost feel out of place because your summer is going just as you thought it would. completely uneventful. long days at the cafe, lonely nights in your room
  • “oh?”
  • you hear your name suddenly and turn your head left to see yukhei leaning against one of the benches
  • on the bench are what look like some of his fellow friends, some have those moto jackets you’ve only seen on tv  hanging off their shoulders and others are drinking out of cups and swinging the keys to their bikes around their fingers
  • yukhei comes over to you and everyone in his crew throws a look over their shoulder
  • you blink when he stops in front of you - right, you think, he’s pretty tall
  • “are you getting off work?”
  • “yep”
  • “it’s really late, your boyfriend doesn’t ever walk you home?”
  • “boyfriend?” 
  • you retort almost sarcastically, because where did the sudden idea that you - walking alone on a boardwalk made for summer romance - have a boyfriend
  • yukhei scratches the back of his neck and you notice some scrapes on his elbows
  • “oh there’s the guy - in the cafe with you all the time, he glares a lot - uh-”
  • “sicheng? oh no, he’s a friend.” you can’t help but chuckle “but you’re right he doesn’t smile often.”
  • yukhei seems to suddenly beam at the confirmation, which makes something inside of you feel a little warm, but awkward so you point to his injuries
  • “bike accident?”
  • he pokes at the yellowing flesh and winces, “yeah. but it happens a lot.”
  • “it seems like a dangerous sport, do you not mind getting hurt?”
  • the question is more curiosity than anything - you’re not trying to be mocking or even mean - and yukhei can tell from the way you’re still casting a concerned look at his other arm for evidence of any other “accidents”
  • “i mean i mind it, but i love it too much to give up” 
  • yukhei laughs and it sounds nice, pleasant - people with good laughs tend to have good hearts
  • “and im not really good at anything else. like if i was to be a waiter in a cafe like you, id probably hurt myself a lot more than i do on a dirt bike”
  • you want to correct him, you’re technically not a waiter - but a barista - but you stop because you are slightly transfixed by the kindness that glows from him 
  • you’ve never seen someone else radiate so……positively
  • suddenly one of his friends calls out his name, asks if he’s going to join them as they head back to get their bikes
  • yukhei looks at you before he answers - “i could walk you home, since it is late.”
  • “that’s ok, thank you for offering.” you push your hands behind your back a little as you tell him goodnight, before you’re a couple of steps away someone from his group shouts out
  • “yukhei’s not only good with dirt bikes - he’s a good kisser too-”
  • by the sound of it, yukhei jumps on his friend and tells him to shut up! you hear the aftermath of the scuffle, but don’t turn around as you giggle to yourself
  • a couple of times after that, you see yukhei simply in passing
  • sometimes you’re in the middle of your shift and he walks by the window with his friends, he looks up and sees you and waves - but he doesn’t come in
  • you wave back every time and a part of you pinches when he the door doesn’t open after
  • other times, you’ll see him after work - or you’ll hear his bike somewhere and he slows down to ask how work is before speeding off to catch up with friends
  • little bits and pieces of interactions, never anything more than that 
  • you don’t really tell sicheng about it either, he grumbles enough about the noise they make and the other things he doesn’t like so you decide not to bother even though he’s a close friend
  • and the twilights of a little crush on yukhei are most definitely seeping into your brain
  • but everything changes when you find yourself closing the cafe after a super busy saturday, where you hadn’t been able to get everyone out until it hit past eleven.
  • the boss had thanked you profously and promised a good overtime check since you’d stayed so late
  • and you were too exhausted to be too mad about having to stay past your schedule
  • as you went through your routine, you nearly jumped from your skin when the door opened and you turned to explain - no really, you were closed now when you came face to face with yukhei
  • the side of his cheek is obviously bruised, scrapes that look like bad road rash cascade down past the angle of his jaw and onto his neck
  • he limps a little when he makes it across the doors threshold and you see dried blood on his knuckles
  • “yukhei?” you rush over and take him by forearm, making sure to hold onto the skin that isn’t covered in some kind of wound
  • “yukhei what are you doing here - did you fall off your bike, you have to go to a hospital now!”
  • not anywhere close to being a doctor, you can only prematurely tend to him with the cheap ass first aid kit from the kitchen
  • the entire time you keep saying that he has to go to the hospital
  • and yukhei mumbles that he doesn’t know where one is, his friends weren’t with him either - he got hurt alone - so he came to the only place that was close by and familiar
  • you look up at him - he’s sitting on the same bar stool that sicheng is usually in  and you’re standing between his legs, bottle of ointment uncapped on the counter - bandages in your hand
  • “ok, ill take you - ill call a friend who has a car.”
  • “im ok.”
  • he lifts a hand and wraps it gently around your wrist. you can feel the wear on his skin from his leather gloves and old callouses from old injuries
  • he stares at you and the only light is from the kitchen, flickering on and off
  • “you’re not ok, you might have a more serious internal injur-”
  • “if i was bleeding inside, i would know.”
  • you frown, he says it like it has happened before - you wonder how many times has yukhei fell off his bike, or gotten hurt some other way - how many times has he done it alone 
  • “fine, you don’t have to go now but go sometime soon. promise me.”
  • he looks at you, the autumn chestnut color you saw when you first met him is glazed now in a darker brown. 
  • “ill promise you if you promise me something too.”
  • swallowing, you become acutely aware of how close you are - his knees are grazing either side of your thighs. your wrist is still in his lax hold.
  • you smell sweat, blood, and cologne on him. he smells the tiredness of your work on you.
  • “this isn’t a joke yukhei, i just want you to be-”
  • “i will go, i promise but promise me something too.”
  • “ok. ok fine, what? do you want free coffee or -”
  • “promise you’ll kiss me at least once before this summer is over.”
  • before you even realize it, you agree. simply because you want him so badly to go to the hospital, or at least that’s how you come to terms with it on your own.
  • you itch as the promise swirls around your head, even hours after you watched yukhei walk away from your front door - banged up and bruised and stilling insisting on walking you home
  • when you see sicheng the next day, you want to tell him about everything because your head feels like a tangled mess 
  • but you don’t - you just pick at the strings of your apron, make drinks and heat up pastries 
  • three days go by and yukhei doesn’t show himself anywhere. he’s not even in his group of friends who you see once again on the boardwalk one night after work
  • you somehow push past the nervous feeling and ask one of them where he is
  • “ah, his bike is all fucked up so he’s been mopping about it while it’s in the shop.”
  • “did he go to the hospital?”
  • the guy laughs, shakes his head - “knowing yukhei, probably not. but we haven’t seen him for a while either.”
  • you say thank you and turn to leave - you hear some kind of buzzing, some kind of mention of you and yukhei and what kind of ‘relationship’ you’re in - but you push past it
  • you don’t even know where he lives, let alone where he rides his bike so you can’t really go and check on him
  • you have to wait for him to come to you - that bothers you.
  • you stop and return to the group, who all simmer to silence when you come close again.
  • “where do you guys usually ride your bikes?”
  • you’ve never been this far up the beach, mostly because this part is relatively blocked off from swimming because of the high ridges of rocks and the part of the coast that disappears into the mountains 
  • there’s a trail for hikers that leads off and into the trees, but you don’t go there - worried you’ll get lost without a map or guidance
  • yukhei’s friends said they mostly biked here  - dirt bikes aren’t motorcycles you know that right babe?
  • you cross your hands over your chest - on your one free day of the week, you want to be splayed out on your floor under a fan. not looking for yukhei - someone who is practically a stranger to you
  • is he though? we might have talked less times than i can count on all my fingers but would i really call him a stranger?
  • you look around but it seems barren, almost eerily quiet and isolated
  • so when the loud sound of an engine roars from that opening into the mountains, you almost teeter back 
  • with a flair of dirt and sand that flies toward you in a storm, you hear a bike rip down and into dune
  • the red bike strikes against the sizzling backdrop of the summer day and your eyes widen when you see it do a half-circle and come to a halt
  • yukhei pulls the helmet off and shakes his sweaty hair from his forehead - he looks over at you and you think you have lost the ability to speak
  • i know im supposed to be angry and concerned, but he looks so hot it’s almost unfair
  • the road rash on his cheek is healing better than expected, but his wounds are all still clear as day - scabbing as they heal
  • he doesn’t get off the bike - just looks at you and then beckons you over with a tilt of his head
  • you almost protest because you came here to be all strong willed and insist that he go see the doctor, also when did his bike get out of the shop? 
  • but you bend to the command and make your way over
  • he kills the engine and stares at you - you stare back
  • “where have you been?”
  • “i went to the hospital like i promised.”
  • the sudden confession makes you drop your hands - “really! what did they say?”
  • “no internal bleeding.” he leans his body slightly over the side of his bike “told you id know if i was dying.”
  • “still, im happy you went. it’s better to be safe than so-” 
  • he drops his helmet on the sand and your sentence cuts off with the sound
  • “so i kept my promise, do you want to keep yours now?”
  • don’t be silly, im not kissing you - you don’t even like me and i don’t -
  • all the excuses in your brain just get lost in the jumble that’s already made a home up there, so you just decide that fine. you will keep that idiotic, dumb, heat of the moment promise.
  • you grab yukhei by the sides of his tank top, starling him as you push yourself toward his mouth
  • using the leveraged grip you let your hold relax only enough so that you can dig your nails through the fabric and into the skin of his ribs
  • yukhei makes a growling noise into your mouth that is somehow more sweltering than the summer sun
  • he cranes his neck slightly so when you run your tongue across the slip of his lips he can easily grant you any of the access you require, one hand goes up to grip the back of his neck
  • he takes one hand from the handles of the bike and slips it to the small of your back - then up between your shoulder blades as he pushes you closer
  • it’s supposed to be one kiss. one little, flimsy kiss, and yet the attraction you feel between you two is so charged that you cannot stop
  • you only break back to see if yukhei feels the same thing, and it is written all over his face, he does
  • that and the way he tells you to step back as he gets off the bike, it falls to the sand and you start to ask why in the world he’s so careless with everything when he just wraps you up in his arms and starts kissing you again
  • “i wont be careless when it comes to you”
  • his mouth is magical, even more so as it drags down to your neck and the layer of sweat between your bodies is threatening to turn to fucking cement and keep you stuck in this embrace for the rest of eternity (not that either of you would mind)
  • but it’s so hot and you are not about to fall back on this sand - so you somehow manage to tell yukhei to meet you later tonight
  • “want a ride home?” he pants, but you unglue yourself from the plane of his perfect chest and shake your head, “meet me at ten.”
  • yukhei is there on time. he didn’t bring his bike, which is a good idea considering the noise it would make, he looks so sweet when you come downstairs and he asks if you want to go on a date
  • a date, like go get dinner if you haven’t had any or play boardwalk games until midnight
  • you say yes. just not tonight 
  • yukhei’s look of childish confusion makes you laugh as you take his hand and lead him back inside.
  • sicheng might have warned you about yukhei being “bad”, the only little problem is you might have always been the “bad” one all along 
  • with how big, strong, dirt biking yukhei looks up at you with absolute awe as you forgo chitchat over shared ice-cream and push him down onto the sheets of your bed
  • in the morning, you have to go to work and yukhei has to leave through the window, but you kiss him one last time and he mumbles he’ll meet you after your shift
  • “now i do have a boyfriend to walk me home, huh?” 
  • you giggle and yukhei nearly trips over himself at the word
  • you do let yukhei take you on a date, of course you do - and it’s as soft and sweet as you expect because yukhei is the opposite of what he looks like at first glance
  • all the bruises, all the confidence, all the arrogant handsomeness that is ingrained in his perfect features is just a cover. he’s a big teddy bear.
  • refusing to let you pay, giving you his jacket, offering to come over early and help you lock up
  • holding your hand gently, kissing your forehead when you complain about dumb customers, the absolute sugary-sweet pillow talk that sometimes makes you feel like you’re in a hallmark movie romcom
  • when sicheng catches yukhei with a hand around your waist on the boardwalk - he nearly calls the police, but you explain everything - sans the more intimate details and it takes a long time for sicheng to accept it but
  • you are happy, god you are so happy it is pouring out of you - especially when you are with yukhei
  • even your boss warms up to him (only him, the rest of his buddies are basically barred from coming into the cafe) 
  • and yukhei, when you see him with others, it’s obvious that he is an extroverted charmer - one afternoon he helps you with orders and when he returns, the receipt is covered in numbers
  • of course - he crumples it and tosses it into the garbage as he lets a secret hand sneak up your shirt behind the shield of the counter
  • and then, the summer is whisking away, and you feel the first kisses of autumn when yukhei is helping you steady yourself on the dirt bike - even though you refuse to actually ever ride it
  • you shiver at the breeze and yukhei feels your goosebumps under his fingertips
  • “hey, are you going to leave once summer is over - i know you and your friends are just staying here because it’s a great place to bike but-”
  • he leans down and buries his face in your hair
  • “why, you gonna miss me if i leave?”
  • you reach behind you to try and flick him, but he dodges
  • “i just wanted to know - if i should get ready for heartbreak or-”
  • “don’t ever say that, i would never hurt you.” 
  • his tone drops and you know he’s being serious
  • “i love you and im not going anywhere.”
  • he helps you off the bike and then pulls you into his arms
  • “promise?” 
  • you whisper, but yukhei hears it and you feel him nod 
  • “promise.”
  • a couple of years later, you hear a loud sound from the living room and rush out to the garage 
  • you see yukhei rubbing his head - wrench in one hand and a broken looking bike on the floor
  • “what happened?!”
  • “i didn’t put the kick stand down all the way so it toppled over”
  • you kneel down beside him and examine him for any wounds, 
  • yukhei watches you and the concern that is always so bright and tender in your eyes when it comes to him
  • you turn his hand over to make sure, the engagement band on his finger catches the light as you do 
  • the matching one on your hand feels cool against his skin.
  • “you’re so careless, seriously!”
  • you puff your cheeks out and chide him with all the love, he smiles back and leans in to kiss your frown
  • “true, but im never careless with you.”
  • you roll your eyes, but it’s true - ever since he first said it till now. 

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance! juyeon 
birthday present for him and one of my best friends! | tw: drowning 

  • a soft splash of water cascades down the side of your arm and you turn your head, still floating, to see eric waving you toward him
  • flipping over, you dive down into the ocean and push yourself toward his direction
  • coming up for air - you see his eyes sparkle as he whispers, “let’s go scare chanhee!”
  • you scrunch up your nose and tell eric that’s not nice but he just insists he has to get back at him. did you forget the incident at the beach two days ago? you know, with the ice-cream?
  • you roll your eyes - recalling some argument over chanhee grabbing the last mango pop or something - but eric is gone before you can answer
  • you watch him doggy paddle to where chanhee and younghoon are - wrapping his arms around the other boy and pulling him down into the water
  • the shouts of shock and laughter wring around you like bells, everything is so happy and sweet, just how summer should be like
  • but something feels weirdly empty 
  • you look up to your left where some of your other friends are, cuddled up against each other, even in the heat people in love just gravitate to each other
  • to your right are strangers, strangers clearly in the middle of their own summertime loves
  • all of a sudden - in the middle of a crowded, bustling ocean - you are hit with loneliness
  • when am i going to find someone who loves me?
  • you sink a little down, haloed by the oceans water, when you hear another sound
  • this one isn’t joyful, in fact it sounds like terror, and you turn to see a flaying hand only a couple of meters away
  • your body freezes - is that person drowning? - your muscles act before you do, propelling you down back into the water and toward the murky outline of the figure
  • you’re a decent enough swimmer, making it to the person - a small boy - just in time to do something
  • but do what? you’ve never saved someone before, do you carry him - do you -
  • “help get him on my back!”
  • the new voice comes from your side, you turn and see that you aren’t the only person who has made it to the boy
  • this person, all cut angles and seriousness, is wearing the lifeguards whistle around his neck and a wave of relief overtakes you
  • “ok!”
  • you do as you’re instructed and the lifeguard tilts his head toward the shore
  • you follow behind him and scramble up the sand - hand on the boys back as you watch everything play out in slow motion
  • all you’re aware of is that you’re down beside the boy, you’re watching the lifeguard do CPR, his mother and father scurry over, people are talking and yelling
  • then the boy jerks up - coughing and doubling over - the lifeguard is asking him something and you don’t even notice till everything is ok
  • that you’re holding the boys hand in your own
  • it’s a blur after that - after the parents thank you and the lifeguard, named juyeon, over and over.
  • and now - you’re sitting in a small cabin off the boardwalk, the lifeguards cabin, and you’ve got a towel on your shoulders and eric is asking if you’re ok now
  • you smile and say you are - just in the time for juyeon to come out of an adjoining office room and you get to look at him seriously for the first time 
  • he’s tall, with wet dark hair pushed back from his forehead. 
  • a light golden tint runs down through his muscular proportions and his eyes are … 
  • they’re captivating 
  • long and outlined by a perpetual darkness, long eyelashes to envy over, and a brown that almost looks onyx under the light
  • he’s shirtless, wearing just the bright orange swim shorts and that whistle
  • he comes over and crouches in front of you with a smile full of kindness, puts a hand on your knee that makes your entire body ignite
  • “thank you for helping me today, whats your name?”
  • eric answers for you and you’re thankful because up close his apparent beauty is way more to handle than you had imagined
  • words - no matter how hard you try to think of one - don’t even manage to formulate in your mind
  • that hand on your knee pats your skin, giving it a little squeeze before juyeon stands back up and says he’s gotta go back out - his shift isnt over
  • eric thanks him and when he’s gone, you hear him chuckle
  • “you know you’re drooling, right?”
  • that summer - you go to the beach every damn day you can
  • you tell your friends you’re just trying to get some workouts in, you know swimming uses all your body’s muscles
  • but no one is fooled
  • because you’re not the only one with what becomes known as “juyeon fever” around town
  • he just moved here, took a summer job lifeguarding at the local beach, and - to only add to your dream boy list - drives a cool looking sports bike to and from work
  • you get to the beach early one day, trying to hide your identity with a ridiculously sized sun hat and issue of the paper you stole from the grocery store - to see him pull up for his shift
  • he’s wearing those swim shorts, same color as his bike, and a hawaiian print shirt in navy (unbuttoned and fluttering behind him as he pulls up and parks)
  • he pulls the helmet off, shaking his hair lose, and you nearly curse to yourself - what is this? am i some extra in a movie all about juyeon, because he looks like the main character of a blockbuster for sure. baywatch level.
  • when he turns in your direction - you hide behind the sunday sudoku and hope he doesn’t notice - but suddenly the sound of feet on sand get louder and louder
  • he says your name and you try to compose yourself as you lower the paper
  • you smile, and ask if juyeon is here to start work
  • he plops himself freely down on the sand beside your towel and pushes the shirt off as he says he is, but he’s a little early
  • you avert your gaze and even as the sun beats down on you both, you feel yourself freeze when juyeon mentions he’s seen you around the beach alot
  • “well - it’s summer.”
  • you explain and juyeon laughs, and even that sound is perfect
  • “that’s true - the ocean is the best place to be in the summer…….and all the time.”
  • you see him stare out at the calm waves, his usual sweet smile still on his face, but those eyes of his look like they’re searching through a memory
  • “do you swim even in winter?”
  • you joke and he laughs again, “i do, at the indoor pools. oh - by the way your friend eric invited me to a barbeque are you going to be there?”
  • barbeque? what barbequ - your eyes widen as you remember that it is THAT barbeque the one you were supposed to come over and help set up
  • “right, yes i am - i actually i promised id buy the plates and stuff so i have to go-”
  • you scramble, rolling up your towel and reaching for your bag when juyeon says
  • “oh - id give you a ride back but my shift starts in five. ill see you there then?”
  • a ride on the back of your bike? - is what you want to ask, knees going weak at the thought - but all you do is nod, dumbfolded smile on your own face
  • he waves as you make your way up the sun and you don’t even have time to get giddy because your phone rings and its exactly who you think it is.
  • eric’s voice from the other side chides; “hey, where are you!? haknyeon just dropped the watermelon all over my kitchen!”
  • you keep looking at your watch
  • the little minute hand ticks to 11:39 and you wonder if juyeon is really going to come
  • the party has already been going on for a good three hours - the summer moon sparkling up above the strings of lights in eric’s backyard
  • everyone you know is already here and you know the public beach closes at 8:30 so it’s not as if juyeon is still on his shift
  • not unless something bad happened………or he’s decided to skip out on the barbeque to go do something else, you know, which someone else-
  • just as you set down your drink, little umbrella pathetically floating to the empty bottom, you hear the reave of a bike
  • everyone else hears it too because the chatter gets more excited and you hear his name float from one person to another
  • “is that juyeon?” “isn’t that the hot lifeguard?” “oh my god, do you think he’s single?”
  • you try to hide your own anticipation - not cool to get so excited over a boy right? - but the butterflies flap in your stomach and you just turn away
  • if he wants to talk to you he can come up to you and if he doesn’t then well it’s his -
  • “hey, sorry im late - do you know where i can put these?”
  • you turn and see juyeon there - for the first time he’s not wearing those neon swim shorts, but a pair of black denim jeans
  • the shirt, still hawaiian print, is slightly buttoned this time but you can still clearly see the dip of his chest and the pretty silver chain that rests on the jut of his collarbones
  • he waves the bags full of chips he picked up on his way over and you lead him toward the refreshments table, every pair of eyes on the two of you
  • “did you get stuck at the beach?”
  • you try to make conversation 
  • “oh no, my bike had a flat tire so i had to get that fixed before i came over.”
  • “oh! well eric is inside if you want to-”
  • juyeon is looking at you, you can feel it because the intensity of his gaze is unmatched, and you don’t know why but you can’t meet it
  • he tilts his head and then agrees - he’ll go see eric, but he’ll come back
  • when he’s gone you let out the breath you’ve been holding and try to scurry away from the gazes that have wavered on you and juyeon the whole fifteen or so minutes he’s even been here
  • you find solace inside, past the kitchen and near the back staircase where the guest bathroom is
  • you’ve been in eric’s house enough times that you know it’s a perfect hiding spot so you don’t bother closing the door
  • you just lean back against the sink and cross your arms - what are you going to do now? juyeon is here, but that doesn’t mean anything. 
  • plus every last single person at this party has him on their radar
  • what makes you any different? the fact that you helped him ONCE?
  • and you didn’t even do anything that serious……you had just been there at the same moment he was……
  • “ah - sorry, i didn’t know anyone was here.”
  • you look up suddenly and juyeon is in front of you again
  • he has this cute, flustered expression on his face - he starts saying something about how eric told him to use the mirror in here since the main bathroom might have a line in front of it and blah blah blah
  • you step forward and you think it’s whatever was in that tiny little umbrella drink you had that makes you put a hand on juyeon’s shoulder and stop him mid sentence
  • “can you take me on that bike ride now?”
  • the second you ask - you think regret starts to bubble in your chest - but juyeon just breaks into another of those heart melting smiles
  • “of course. i actually….” he scratches the back of his neck “i actually dont really like big parties.”
  • you’re remembered of those lovers you had seen at the beach, tangled in each other despite the summer heat, as you press a little tighter against juyeon’s back
  • the wind from the bike flutters your hair - and you feel his strong figure through the thin fabric of that ridiculous shirt he’s always wearing
  • you close your eyes, thinking back to the shocked expression on everyones face as juyeon had pulled you through them and toward his parked bike
  • how they had looked so confused - and eric had just shot you a thumbs up from the back step of his door
  • your heart beats heavy in your ears and at the end of your fingertips you feel the flex of juyeon’s abs in response to your tight hold. it feels so intimate.
  • juyeon stops at the only place you’d expect him too, the beach
  • it looks serene and beautiful in the darkness of the summer night
  • the sand isn’t as scorching as usual and the waves only kiss the shore slightly
  • you and him walk down toward it - feet reaching just the edge before you run back to avoid getting wet
  • juyeon laughs and runs toward you, strong arms picking you up and before you know it, you’re up in the air and dangling above the water
  • you’re telling him to not let you go, no matter what and juyeon is chuckling promising over and over he won’t he won’t
  • i will never let you go
  • your laughing and playing around leaves you breathless, when you and juyeon lay back down on the sand and stare up at a starless sky
  • just that summer moon glistening down on you both
  • “why did you become a lifeguard by the way?” you ask - just to break the comfortable silence
  • “because i love the ocean, but know it can be a scary place too.”
  • you turn to look at his profile, even more perfect inches away
  • “i like that about it, that it’s both beautiful and a little dangerous. i like things that have that duality.”
  • “so you must like love too?”
  • you don’t even mean to say it, it simply slips from your lips and juyeon turns to face you
  • his smile turns to another expression, more earnest and soft
  • “yes, i do.”
  • you swallow, “ i do too, that’s why im looking for it.”
  • the silence that follows is coated with the midnight waves and insects that come out only in the warm months
  • before, when you couldn’t meet his gaze, you were just being shy and afraid
  • now you are vulnerable and staring back - deep into those darker than the earth browns when suddenly his large hand comes gently up to your waist
  • his eyes don’t leave yours, not until you’ve been pushed up flush against him in the sand and they close in time with yours as his lips ghost over yours
  • polite, without having to be, he whispers - can i? and you whisper back - you can.
  • the first kiss is chaste and pure, vanilla bean ice-cream flavored with a little speckle of a firework. 
  • it’s after you breach this first step that you both decide you can do better than that.
  • juyeon pulls you ontop of him, rolling his back deeper into the sand as you sit up on his hips and push your hands into the flimsy fabric of his shirt
  • it gives way, off his broad shoulders and you lean down to press kisses down from the edge of his jawline to the curve of his long throat, and then down to his shoulders
  • the entire time, his large hands seize you in place by your waist, he makes sounds of wordless pleasure and when you bite down into that perfect skin of his you feel like you’re marking an untouched beauty
  • he runs one hand up to the back of your neck and he pulls you in back to his mouth
  • sitting up easily as his tongue runs across the seal of your lips, you get yourself comfortable in the crook of his lap - pressed to the bare skin of his chest
  • this kiss tastes of fiery spice, multiple fireworks - a whole parade 
  • and when you grind down slightly juyeon makes an animalistic echo that runs from his lips to your spine and you think you could really just let him slip whatever you’re wearing off 
  • but just as you separate to help him with the task, you hear the screech of a car pull up
  • “who is there? the beach is closed!”
  • you pull back off of juyeon and gather yourself up - juyeon jumps to his feet too and you turn to help him button his shirt back up so you two look like you haven’t just been making out for god knows how long
  • the voice calls again, “hey - you two - you know the beach is closed right!”
  • you see the officer’s figure and wave back
  • “oh we didn’t know! we’ll leave in a moment!”
  • the officer motions for you two to get back up to the street and you and juyeon try not to laugh as he lectures you two on public decency
  • after that, juyeon drives you back on his bike and although you are more than willing to invite him back inside with you, all you do is share another kiss on your doorstep
  • “i should at least take you on a date before, you know?” 
  • he mutters against your lips and you roll your eyes - modesty in this day and age?
  • “fine, but after that we have all summer.”
  • and you do have all summer. despite the fact that half the towns population is seething with jealousy about it.
  • you have the entire summer to bask in the unfiltered, sweet, and hot like the sun romance you have wished for for so long
  • meeting up with juyeon after his shifts, taking bike rides to other towns, picnics, amusement parks, dates shopping because you need him out of that hawaiian shirt, and get togethers with your friends as everyone else who is coupled off sticks to their other half and you ……… you stick to yours, juyeon
  • little kisses before he has to go to work - little hand touches when you’re sitting around eric’s dinner table playing monopoly as chanhee schemes you all out of your properties - arm around your waist when you go out to dinner
  • and pressing close in the depths of his room or yours, the sound a symphony of little noises and the buzz of the fan on your naked skins
  • its a summer that you only thought was possible in a movie or at least in someone elses life, not yours
  • and when embarrassing tell juyeon about your theory that he’s the main character of a summer romcom blockbuster
  • he looks at you clearly and smiles, “and so are you - since you’re my love interest right?”
  • you feel a flush overtake you and you laugh, say something about how you’re not star quality, and juyeon just pulls you back into him
  • “what are you talking about, you’re the only star for me.”
  • and you don’t expect him to remember that little line all these years later
  • when you’re standing with your toes in the sand, back at the beach you and juyeon fell in love with so long ago
  • you point to the lifeguard chair and joke
  • “i used to watch you and think you belonged on baywatch or something - you know everyone was in love with you right?”
  • his hand is a comfortable, knowing weight on the curve of your waist
  • “well i was only in love with you.”
  • you scrunch your nose up and lean in to peck his lips
  • “that’s sweet.”
  • “i mean, you were the only star for me.” 
  • you turn, juyeon’s face - still handsome even though more mature - seems to flash for a second with a look he had when you two were much younger
  • “the only star for me then and now.” 

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au kun
it’s late …… but happy birthday leader kun ~
find others here: johnny|haechan|taeil|taeyong|mark|jaemin|yangyang|yuta|sicheng |chenle

  • there’s a sharp knock on the glass of your window 
  • you stare up at the ceiling and don’t move an inch from the comfort of your bed until the knock comes again. and again.
  • with a groan you roll off your sheets and compose yourself before walking over and pushing your curtains aside
  • on the other side of the window is kun
  • standing god knows how on the side of the second story of your house and you cross your arms
  • he motions for you to open the window and you shake your head
  • he rolls his eyes and somehow the little gesture ticks you off to no end
  • who does he think he is? always being so rude, even when he needs me to do something for him!
  • he motions again and you try not to look at the strong line of his arms - he’s wearing a sleeveless tank and jeans which really? how athletic is he climbing in those thing-
  • you sneer but you give in, undoing the latch and pushing open the window
  • stepping back, kun climbs through without a hitch and once he’s standing on the carpet of your bedroom you look up and start
  • “i was about to go to sleep what are you doing her-”
  • “where’s your cousin?”
  • he doesn’t even look at you.
  • in fact, he looks over your shoulder at your door that’s closed
  • “he said to meet him before we both sneak out, but that dumbass could have just met me at the party himself.”
  • you uncross your arms and instead curl your fingers into fists at your side
  • “so why didn’t you sneak through the guestroom window asshole -”
  • “don’t know which window is the guest room. i just knew this one was yours because of the childish curtains.”
  • he gets under your nerves. he really does. he has since you meet him as the naïve new kid at your towns middle school
  • and he - he was the ever so perfect at everything upperclassman. 
  • that hadn’t changed much now - as you got older you came to understand that kun could do no wrong in the eyes of everyone BUT you
  • your parents thought he was the shining example of a young man, your friends all wanted to date him, and now even your cousin who was staying with you for the summer was impressed with him.
  • they’d met at the party you had thrown to welcome your cousin and how kun even got there - you don’t know - but he’d shown up with sicheng and ten 
  • and then was talking to your cousin and everyone and making you irritated the entire night ……. and yet ………… here he was now 
  • sneaking out with YOUR cousin to go to another party. who’s party? you didn’t know - your own damn cousin had invited KUN and not YOU
  • you don’t want to bite your tongue anymore - you want to start mouthing off on him just like he thinks he has the right to do with you 
  • but if you raise your voice, you’ll wake your parents and you have the sinking feeling that if they walked in on this scene 
  • they might not be as angry about it as other parents would be……you cringe, thinking about how your mother had once inquired you if kun and you were considering being more than friends.
  • you look up at him now. more than friends? he’s going to be my enemy till i die.
  • you think your worry comes to life when your door opens and you turn so fast in fear of seeing your parents actually standing there, but it is just your cousin
  • who grins at kun and pushes past you like you’re a ghost in your own room
  • “ready to go dude?” he asks and kun suddenly takes this moment of all to look at you 
  • he makes a noise of agreement, but he keeps his line of vision on you. it makes something crawl up your skin. creep, don’t look at me like that! 
  • it only lasts a split second, before both boys are using your window to sneak out into the sticky summer night and you’re rushing over to shut it. 
  • before you do - you watch them disappear out of the backyard - two figures in the moon. 
  • you huff, reaching for your curtains and you don’t notice kun look back.
  • this keeps happening. 
  • sometimes kun does come sneaking back through your window (he says he can’t get the guest room one where your cousin is - there’s nothing for him to climb up on that side of the house) but rather than just that
  • kun just keeps appearing around you
  • he’s at the same parties, he’s at the same park, he’s at the same beach. the town has never felt smaller and your cousin is the reason for it all. he drags kun everywhere - like they’re the bestest of friends.
  • they’ve known each other for like two or something weeks…..can’t they find other people to hangout with! maybe i should just stay in my room from now on-
  • you turn off the shower and try to erase the thought from your head. you wrap a towel around yourself and scurry down the hall back to your room where you shut the door and sigh.
  • he annoys me so much that my brain can’t help thinking about him when it should just be trying to throw him out of my he-
  • your shoulders tense when you hear a familiar sound at the window. 
  • no fucking way
  • the curtains are drawn back now and through the glass you see the familiar outline of kun’s figure
  • you stomp over - you’ve been boiling over his constant presence and you think fine, he wants to come into your room, you wont let him until he hears what you really think
  • so you yank the window up, but not enough for him to climb through
  • “hey i can-”
  • “kun, i know everyone thinks your gods gift to this earth but what would they think of you trying to sneak into my room through the goddamn window at midnight? huh? can’t spend your summer doing something better than bothering me? that’s what the prince of this little town does - peep through wind-”
  • in the heat of the moment you throw your hands up to the glass of the window and the towel ……. drops
  • you probably wouldn’t have even noticed - how wound up you’ve gotten - but kun 
  • kun nearly falls straight off the side of your house and you can see the panic reflected in his eyes flash so you yank the window up and instead of letting him fall backwards
  • you pull him in and ontop of you
  • the two of you topple over onto your carpet - the thudding sound resounds and kun catches himself on his arms so his weight doesn’t crush you
  • you stare up - that flash of panic is still in kun’s eyes and for a second you try to figure out why when you feel the summer air gust through and all over your exposed skin
  • you scream, because what else can you do, and kun pushes himself off you
  • you reach for the towel pooled beside you and wrap yourself back up - getting to your feet with wobbly horror and staring at kun who is sitting back with that expression stil on his face
  • it doesn’t last long though because you hear someone pull at your doorknob - your mothers voice coming from the otherside
  • kun falls back and rolls himself under your bedframe - just in time for the door to open and your mother to rush in with worry laced in her voice
  • “what happened?”
  • qian kun just saw me naked!
  • “i- i though-i thought i saw something in the window im fine, really!”
  • your mother pries but you push her back toward the door gently, assuring her that it was probably an owl or a racoon in a tree. really. 
  • she touches your shoulder and says to call her if you need anything. you close the door again and listen to her footsteps down the stairs.
  • you breath in and turn around - kun has gotten out from under the bed and is now standing at the corner of your bed looking more lost than you’ve ever seen him in your life
  • no snarky remarks, no stupid smug look on his face 
  • you feel angry. you still feel all pissed off from before, but now there’s something else coursing through you. 
  • shame.
  • “get out”
  • you grit your teeth. 
  • “i - i would never-”
  • “get out kun, seriously.”
  • he stumbles, no confidence and no superiority, just an almost wounded like stride as he reaches for the window again.
  • he looks over his shoulder and you brace yourself - with him, he could look sad all he wants but you know deep down he could say something so cruel right about now-
  • “im sorry.”
  • you clutch the towel 
  • sorry for what? for being better than me at everything? for having to see me at my most vulnerable when all i ever see you at is your best?
  • you think - or at least you assume you think this - you don’t realize you’ve said it out loud
  • kun stops and swallows, “im not the best at anything. im a horrible liar you know.”
  • “what?”
  • the towel should be soft, but it feels heavy, like a lifeline you’re gripping but that just gets harder and harder to keep close
  • kun pushes his lower body through the window and then looks at you one final time
  • “im a horrible liar. the reasons i even- the reason im always around you isn’t because of your cousin. it’s because i want to be near-”
  • you don’t hear the last word because he disappears right after that, you stand in the corner of your room, he wants to be near what? 
  • you look at the shut door, the mirror hanging on the back of it, and your reflection
  • did he say he wants to be near me?
  • you don’t really go anywhere for a couple of days after that. 
  • your cousin is always out, but you don’t even want to go see your friends. you just know that that will risk seeing-
  • something knocks against your window and you look over, a new feeling swelling in your chest that isn’t like that dread you’ve felt before
  • but instead of kun’s figure - you just see the raindrops that are accumulating on the glass
  • a heavy summer storm brews up outside and you think it’s ironic. your brain feels like it is going through a tornado of its own. 
  • you walk toward it and think it would be nice to feel the rain though - to touch something outside of room and when you open it you do see something
  • you see someone in the backyard
  • “kun?”
  • you’re rushing out on the grass - barefoot and wrapping your arms around yourself in the wind of the rain
  • “kun why are you here - my cou-”
  • “im here to see you.”
  • you don’t understand - and then a strong chill that doesn’t come from the storm runs up your spine - he’s here to make fun of me isn’t he? mock me?
  • “listen, i don’t want to hear it from you of all people - you saw me naked for a second and you have no right-”
  • “its you. im always here to see you. do you understand?”
  • he’s talking over me - like usual - but why is his tone-
  • “excuse me? understand wh-”
  • the rain gets heavier and you cannot believe you’re about to do this but you’re getting soaked and so is kun and so you point to your window
  • “meet me up there.”
  • you don’t know why you invite him. you expect the worst and you expect to get hurt and made fun of it. but you do it anyway. 
  • part of you is saying it’s because you want to pick a fight - but another part, quieter and that’s been dormant for a while says no, it’s because you might think you hate kun but you aren’t going to let him stand out in the rain any longer.
  • you wish you could tell this part to shut up and go away, but you give into it every time. especially, it seems, when it comes to him of all people.
  • kun looks displaced again in your room - he usually sneaks through and acts like he owns the place - but this time he’s back to this awkward atmosphere
  • you feel sick thinking about how you kind of wish you had the other side of him back
  • “so why are you here kun, really. it’s embarrassing enough for me that you saw me-”
  • “im sick of lying.” 
  • you blink, looking at him more seriously
  • “lying?”
  • “your cousin is fun and all, but cmon - you said it yourself. everyone expects the best of me, why would i spend my summer partying around the town. do you think i like it?”
  • speechless you don’t say anything in response and kun continues
  • “it’s just, finally i had an excuse good enough to be around you. to sneak up through your window, to hangout with the people you are friends with, to see you. otherwise - i never get a chance to-”
  • he looks different tonight, maybe because he’s drenched with rain, but he looks more like the kun you’ve known for years
  • put together, serious, he even has his glasses on tonight which shocks you more than anything because ever since the summer started - ever since he’s been around your cousin - he seems to have ditched them
  • you think slowly the pieces are coming together in your head about what point kun is making
  • it creeps in and you think shock is going to overcome you when kun confesses - with none of that bravado he seems to have adapted - 
  • “i just know you hate me and without a good reason you would never let me near you so i - i just did the one thing that meant i could be close to you, because i dont hate you, i really like-”
  • you take a couple of steps toward him, closing your fingers around his face and you hear kun’s breath hitch up 
  • you pull him down and toward you and just as you’re about to brush your lips against his - you instead pull him into a tight hug
  • you bury your face in his chest. his hands stuck stiff at his sides
  • “im not going to kiss you until you promise me one thing kun”
  • you can feel his heartbeat and yours, both rushing - louder than the thunder outside
  • “wh-what?”
  • “if we do this - whatever this will be - you have to promise you’ll still hangout with my cousin. he really thinks you guys are best friends.”
  • after a bit of a pause you feel his chest rumble with laughter
  • which you take offense to as you pull out of his arms - “hey don’t laugh! im being seri-”
  • “this is why i want to be near you by the way.”
  • he looks at you and for the first time it isn’t cold or accompanied by a sneer, the warmth in the deep browns almost makes you coy
  • “the guy you’re enemies with tells you they like you and you go ‘whatever, just keep being nice to my cousin’.”
  • you cross your arms, “family before boyfriends.”
  • kun cocks an eyebrow, “boyfriend? you move fast.”
  • “qian kun you’ve seen me naked. you better be ready for commitment.”
  • he loops his hands around your waist and you yelp a little at the sound contact - hugging and all is one but now he is pushing you up and against him
  • “im ready for anything if it means i can see you naked again.”
  • after that - everything shifts
  • naturally it does, you do start dating the guy you swore you’d hate till you died but that’s not the only thing
  • you are also dating the most sought after guy in your town and while most of the other people your age go green with envy - your parents and cousin (surprisingly) are over the moon
  • your parents you get, but you thought your cousin would hate the idea - when infact he confesses that he’s happy you like kun now - you all three can hangout easier for the rest of his summer here!
  • you’re all having dinner one time and your mother asks what made you finally realize you liked kun
  • you fluster, and kun quips that he just had to sneak through your window a couple of times to end up sneaking into your heart
  • your parents laugh - oh qian kun would never sneak through a window, only bad boys do that!
  • you almost choke on your peas
  • you won’t lie - you have insecurities and worries in the beginning, kun could still be pulling a fast one on you. or maybe you two just will never get over the competition between each other.
  • but that all proves null, you and him can be sarcastic and joke around all you want it doesn’t stop the feelings that grow tenfold through the summer 
  • that feeling that when you are with him, there isn’t anyone else around 
  • and kun really is the best at everything (you don’t say it out loud though)
  • but he does have the looks, the brains, the popularity and boy does he know what he’s doing with those hands of his 
  • safe to say that he might have seen you naked first but you definitely saw him as well
  • you joke about it and your cousin is like ok. nevermind. this relationship between yall is GROSS jkjk
  • and then - like all things, summer ends, and your cousin is back off to his hometown 
  • and when you’re saying goodbye - he goes up to you and leans in to whisper something so no one else hears
  • “that’s not going to happen!”
  • you exclaim when he leans out, but he just shrugs and says “just promise you will.”
  • so you do promise. 
  • when you comeback to join kun he asks what the promise was about and you roll your eyes, muttering that it’s unrealistic so it doesn’t matter.
  • the only issue is - it is very realistic
  • because ten years later you are sending out invitations to you and kun’s wedding
  • he’s sitting at the dinner table beside you and watching you handwrite the notes, cutely testing out your cursive 
  • he teases your mistakes and you swat at him, he leans down to kiss the side of your cheek when he looks at the invitation in your hand
  • it’s addressed to your cousin and kun reads it out loud: 
  • “hey cousin, im keeping my promise from the past - the promise that id invite you to me and kun’s wedding.”
  • kun looks at you and you can’t believe the look makes you blush - even as a damn adult
  • kun keeps reading;
  • “and the other promise - that ill dance with you right after i dance with kun.”
  • kun chuckles, “you might not keep that one - because im not letting anyone else dance with after me. you’ll be mine that night.”
  • you scrunch up your nose, “dummy - ill be yours forever.” 
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