#overwhelm
Tinnitus seriesbyAriee
There was a last straw (it was silly and minor as last straws always are). I had a huge meltdown that started with screaming and hitting and ended with the loudest sobbing cries, as I mopped up the aforementioned last straw.
Meltdowns are the hardest things for me to openly discuss… I’m not actually sure I ever really have. So, here’s a first.
I hate them. They’re very self destructive, and they lack any ounce of coherent thought and they won’t be stopped with the idea of ‘consequences’. They pretty much just have to burn themselves out.
Well, today’s consequences started out with a scared cat (hiding behind the teevee), and have ended with what is probably a vocal chord hemorrhage |:
Cat has forgiven me and is now happily snoozing, but I have no voice and it’s quite painful. I also hurt my arm. This was really difficult for me to post about, but these things need to be less taboo. I know very few people actually have these kinds of issues, but that doesn’t mean they should only be spoken about in hushed whispers.
I’m always ashamed, embarrassed, regretful, and I doubt that will change, but I *will* talk about it, and I will *not* be ashamed of talking about it.
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What I now realise know about stress and anxiety, is that rather than a dysfunctional thought pattern, weakness or worry - it can get be an overstimulated state of being.
Unconscious. Subconscious. Bucket almost overflowing with accumulated things. Viral load. Inflammation. Trauma.
Stress can be excitement- good or bad
It isn’t always the stereotype worrier, neurotic, over thinker
It’s just an undercurrent of overwhelm that can manifest in even the most calm person
I get overwhelmed easily when I’m not taking care of myself. I won’t feel my best and then before I know it, everything is terrible and I feel doomed.
Despite how I’m feeling, there ARE things that can help. Here’s what I do when I’m feeling overwhelmed:
1. I check my PLEASE skill. Am I hungry? Am I tired? Am I feeling sick? Did I miss my meds? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, I make sure to meet those physical needs asap.
2. I clock out for the rest of the day. When I’m feeling overwhelmed, the thought of doing even one more thing can totally break me. So if I’m able, I take a ‘mental health day’ for the rest of the day. I push all important tasks to the next day.
3. I engage in comfort activities. I watch a favorite movie, pet my cat, have a nice snack.
4. I sleep. If the overwhelm gets too strong, I hit that reset button and spend some time unconscious. Whether it’s a nap or an early bed time, I usually wake up feeling much better.
Remember: if you’re feeling like it’s the end of the world, it’s usually your body/mind being dramatic as a way to ask for something it needs like food or rest.
Try out these suggestions the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed and let me know what works for you!
Stay skillful,
Kat
