#realistic writing

The moment is tense. The character is looking at something that makes them so angry. And the reader can feel that anger, can feelthe tension building. And then…

“He doesn’t realize how hard he’s clenching his fist until he looks down and sees bloody half-moons pressed into his palm.”

Aaaaannndd it’s gone.

All that tension and build-up just deflates in a single moment due to this line, only to be replaced by a heavy sigh, or worse, a physical eye-roll.

There’s 3 reasons why this scene (played out in so many books) garners this reaction from readers.

1. It’s overdone

It happens so often it’s become cliche. Like…really cliche. If you think your character is the first character to have this reaction, I’m sorry to inform you that this is very much not the case. And if you’re thinking “well I don’t mind if it’s original, because it fits the scene,” well…continue to reason #2

2. It’s melodramatic

It’s way too over-the-top. No one does this in real life. Especially for like…contemporary fiction? Like at least if the fate of the universe is at stake it’s easy to see how the author could have gone there. But I’ve seen so many times where it’s “average school boy is jealous” or “average school girl is mad at bully” type scenarios, which…no. No one gets so jealous they don’t realize they’re carving into their hands. Or even the ones where they donotice but they “like the pain because it grounds them”? But if your think it’s not melodramatic, well…continue to reason #3

3. It’s actually pretty much impossible.

Most of the time I see this, it’s a male character who doesn’t defy gender norms, or a female character that does. (And the “I’m not like other girls” trope is a whole other discussion) Meaning that 95% of the characters who do this have short or medium-length nails.

And here’s the thing: human skin is incredibly elastic. This means that it can stretch a LOT before it actually breaks. If the skin were pulled taut, you could discount some of this elasticity, however when the hand is curled into a fist, the skin of the palm is the most relaxed it can be. (Just take a look at all those wrinkles and folds!) Not to mention that the human fingernail is relatively blunt and spreads the force out over a larger surface area. And fortunately (unfortunately?) our grip strength just isn’t enough to break the skin of our palms with short-to-moderate length nails just by making a fist and squeezing.

I mean…just try it. I have short-ish nails and I couldn’t break skin even while squeezing it even tighter with my other hand. It wasn’t pain that stopped me from squeezing harder, it was just that the max force I could apply wasn’t enough.

If you need more proof, just look at punching. Professional fighters always keep their nails short-to-moderate length because if they punched someone with long nails, they risk cutting their own palm. But if landing repeated punches with short-to-moderate nails doesn’t cut someone’s palm, there’s no way that squeezing the fist alone would accomplish that.

Theycan leave little indentation marks, and those marks can hurt quite a bit and linger for a while. But don’t have the character clench their fist until their nails break skin or draw blood from their palms. It’s just not realistic.

When this rule doesn’t apply:

Now, of course, if your character is Lady Deathstrike or some kind of wolfman or something and has claws or talons instead of fingernails, this might be different. In fact, if your character is new to these claws, and underestimates the force they can apply to their fist-clenching, then it might actually happen! However, (and this is a big however) they would notice. They would react the same way they would if they stepped on a nail or piece of scrap metal and cut their foot. Don’t just have them staring broodily at their enemy as their claws slowly carve into their palms and have them not even wince. That’s back to reason #2

Other tropes along the same line

Reasons #1 and #2 can also be said for the “character bites lip until it bleeds” trope. However, this one is technically 100% possible, as humans have more than enough bite strength to puncture our delicate lip tissue. Except that our brains won’t let us just do that willy-nilly. It hurts too much and our reflex (even while distracted with anger/jealousy/frustration) is to stop biting down once that pain fires off. 

This one is at least able to be modulated easily for the same general effect. For example, the character could chew at a little bit of dry skin on their lip and, in their distracted anger/jealousy/frustration, cause that bit of skin to tear too deeply (we’ve all been there, amirite?). This would hurt, potentially bleed, and almost certainly give them that metallic taste in their mouth we know you were looking for.

Keep in mind! Either way, unless the person just permanently maimed their lip, the blood should be kept minimal. I’ve read books where the blood “gushes into their mouth” from a frustratedly-bitten lip, and…no. There’s no way that should do that.

Hope this helps some of you with your writing journey!

Good luck and good writing!

You’ve seen it in movies. You’ve read it in books. Someone gets tased, their eyes roll back in their head, and then they’re out like a light. Usually for several minutes.

Thing is, that’s not really how tasers or stun guns work.

Lets pull back a bit.

What are tasers and stun guns?

Unfortunately, the terminology surrounding these devices can get a bit screwy, so bear with me. (TLDR below)

“Stun gun" is a very broad term and essentially encompasses any weapon that shocks someone in order to “stun or immobilize” them. This can be anything from the typical self-defense tool, to cattle prods, to even tasers. However most of the time, they are referring to compact stun guns, which fit in the hand. 

“Taser” is a actually just a brand name for a company that makes products that stun people. They’re most known for a type of long-range Electronic Control Device (ECD). This is the type of thing you would see a police officer carrying that looks sort of like a gun, although they make ones for civilian use as well [x]. However, since they’re one of the only companies that makes a long-range ECD, it’s not uncommon to simply refer to these types of devices as ‘tasers’. This is despite the fact that the company also make compact stun guns, such as the Taser Bolt [x]. 

The main ways compact stun guns (which I’ll be referring to as just stun guns from now on) and long-range ECD’s (which I’ll be referring to as tasers from now on) differ are in the range and method of immobilization. 

Stun guns require you to be within arm’s distance of the person being shocked, since you need to touch the two conductive prongs directly to their skin to shock them. Tasers, on the other hand, shoot out projectiles connected to the main device by thin, conductive wires. Those projectiles deliver a shock into the subject in a pulse (usually around 5-30 seconds, depending on the model) each time the trigger is pulled. Tasers can also be used just like compact stun guns if the cartridge is removed (especially useful if you’ve already shot it and don’t have a spare cartridge).

Taser projectiles:

When a taser delivers its shock, it causes something called Neuromuscular Incapacitation (NMI). This means that the actual muscles themselves lock up and are incapable of moving for the entire duration of the shock. Stun guns on the other hand, do NOT utilize NMI. They instead rely on “pain compliance”, which is a fancy way of saying that it will hurt so bad, they should really want to stop, but that it doesn’t actually stop the muscles from being able to move.

This can be especially problematic if the subject you are shocking with a stun gun is on heavy drugs, has a neuromuscular disease or pain disorder, or even just has an extremely high pain tolerance. (Or, if you’re writing in any kind of fantasy story, if your character is possessed, being mind controlled, or under a spell.) With a taser, there is no way to “power through the pain”, however it’s possible with a stun gun.

TLDR

• Taser: 
• Brand name, but generally:
• Shaped like a gun 
• Long/medium range (shoots wired projectiles) 
• Utilizes Neuromuscular Incapacitation (NMI) 
• Physically locks up the muscles
• Stun Gun: 
• Very broad term, but generally:
• Shaped like an electric razor 
• Extremely short range (direct contact) 
• Utilizes pain compliance only 
• Does NOT lock up the muscles

How long do the effects last?

The NMI caused by a taser shock only lasts as long as the pulse. It’s completely possible to get tased and then get up and run off the second the pulse stops. 

It’s possible, however, that hitting the ground could cause concussions, abrasions, broken bones, etc that would last for much longer.

There’s also the fact that getting shocked with a taser means you’ll have to get the barbed projectiles removed, which hurts about as much as you’d expect, and could be subject to infection just like any puncture wound.

Will getting tased or shocked with a stun gun render a person unconscious?

No.

At least, not the shock itself.

If the character falls and hits their head while being shocked, they might be rendered unconscious, and if the character has a really low pain tolerance, they might faint from the pain.

HOWEVER, don’t expect it! Don’t make step 3 of your characters’ daring escape plan “tase the guard, and while he’s unconscious, steal his keys.” This happens so often in books an movies and it’s so unrealistic. It’s so few and far between that it will actually happen, especially with a character that has any sort of pain tolerance. 

Seriously, I mean people get tased all the time and don’t faint. If you think your dastardly villain’s elite guards are going to faint from something your friendly neighborhood weed dealer got hit with 3 times in a row in the middle of a Denny’s and was fine with, then…your dastardly villain needs new guards.

Good luck and good writing!

No really.

Taking the bullet out does nothing to help the person, and if your characters are in the field instead of a hospital, may actually cause more harm than good.

Imagine for a moment that you (for reasons unknown to all) decided to turn your sink on wide open, pick up a handgun, and shoot the pipes under your sink.

Maybe it hit the drain pipe, which would be bad, since all the water coming through the faucet is now dribbling out all over the floor. But even worse would be if it hit the water intake pipe, right? In that case, water under high pressure would be spraying everywhere!

Two bad options if you for some reason shoot your sink:

The vascular system of the human body is essentially one big set of pipes. The drain pipe? Those would be veins—under low pressure, but still very bad to leak from. The water intake pipe? Those would be the arteries—under high pressure and VERY dangerous to puncture.

But back to the sink example. Say you shot the pipes and hit the drain pipe (vein). Now there’s water pouring out onto the floor. Your roommate says “Quick! Wrap your hand around the pipe to hold the water in!” (“Put pressure on the wound!”) And you do! Water is still slipping out from under your hand, but it’s leaking a lot less than before! Right now, you COULD find some duct tape (bandages) and secure the pipe further so you don’t have to keep holding it.

Instead, however, you say to your roommate: “Hold on! I’ve got to find the bullet!” You let go of the pipe (stop putting pressure on the wound) to dig around in the cabinet (body) for the bullet. Seconds, maybe even minutes pass, and that pipe is freely gushing out water the whole time. 

Finally, you find it! You pry the bullet out of the wood, hold it up to your roommate, and drop it in a little metal dish with a ‘clink’.

“Job well done,” you tell yourself. “We’re out of the woods now.”

Except that, you know, the pipe is still damaged and gushing water out onto the floor, and the bullet wasn’t actually doing anything harmful inside the cabinet. Also, while you were rummaging around for little Houdini, you weren’t putting pressure on the pipe, so that sink (patient) lost a whole lot of water (blood) that it didn’t need to. Can you imagine how much more it would have been if you’d hit the water intake pipe (artery) instead?

I know what you’re thinking. “But in movies—!!” And I know. But here’s the thing: Hollywood? It’s a bouquet of lies. I’m sorry. I really am.

In fact, even that distinctly bullet-shaped thing you usually see pulled out of people in movies may not always be true. Many times the bullet mushrooms out or becomes malformed. Depending on what that bullet ran into (like bone) it might have even broken into a dozen pieces. Try digging those out of your protagonist!

Now sometimes, but not always, doctors WILL remove the bullet (or fragments of bullet). For example, if they’ve already got the patient in surgery, and AFTER they’ve already repaired any veins, arteries, and organs to the best of their ability. Or if the patient doesn’t need surgery (if it didn’t hit anything major and is just lodged in the muscle or fat) but doctors notice that the bullet or fragment is likely to cause damage if left inside the patient. 

More often than not, however, the bullet isn’t doing anything actively damaging while inside the patient, or the removal of the bullet would be more dangerous than leaving it where it is. This is why most bullets don’t get removed at all. 

This is true if your characters are at a hospital, but ESPECIALLY if this is a field job. If trained physicians with all the tools at their disposal, blood transfusions, and a sterile environment most likely won’t take the bullet out, then Dave McSide-Character should DEFINITELY not be sticking his filthy, 5-straight-chapters-of-parkour fingers or his I-just-stabbed-a-guy-but-I-wiped-the-blood-off-on-my-pants knife inside the protagonist to fish around for some bullet that isn’t even causing harm. The recommended way to deal with a gunshot wound in the field? Pack it with gauze (or yes, even a filthy we’ve-been-on-the-run-for-two-weeks-in-the-same-clothes t-shirt if that’s all you have. Wound infection is a different post) and keep constant pressure on it.

Remember: stopping the leak in the sink is the most important thing. Not rummaging around in the cabinet for the bullet. Taking it out does literally nothing.

Two perfectly realistic reasons why you might have a character take the bullet out:

Now, sometimes, depending on the characters or the world you’re writing in, this might be different. In some instances, you might want to write the lead-scavenger-hunt scene in!

The first reason is if they just don’t know

And that’s really important when writing realistically. Not everyone is a professional in emergency wound care. Most people get all their knowledge of emergency medicine from Grey’s Anatomy and House M.D.

• If your character has any medical training? Probably don’t do it
• If your character has any military or police training? Some know, some don’t, so writing it either way is believable. It’s a toss-up, but they DO have more experience with gunshot wounds (either personally, witnessed, or in training videos and word of mouth)
• If your character is a 17-year-old art student who saw blood for the very first time two chapters ago? Well now that character might just try digging for the bullet
  

And hey, maybe they’re like “I’m gonna get the bullet out!” but another character (the one who was shot, another character in the room, maybe even a 911 operator) steps in and says “No, no, no! Just put pressure on it!”

But regardless, injured characters in movies are always suddenly on the mend after the bullet is taken out. The vitals start to rise, they aren’t gasping for breath, their hand closes firmly around the love-interest’s hand, etc. And this doesn’t happen. Regardless of what your characterdoes, the rules of biology are still in play.

In the end, though, that bullet’s just minding its own business in there. The #1 priority is fixing the damage it caused on the way in.

The second reason is if the bullet is special

This is more for the SciFi/Fantasy writers.

If your character is a werewolf and was just shot by a silver bullet which is stopping their healing process and is slowly killing them? Yeah, take it out

If the bullet is actually some sort of tiny robot designed to burrow into their organs one by one? Yeah, take it out.

If the bullet had a spell or curse placed on it? Yeah, take it out.

If they need to get transported up to the med bay, but the bullet would cause some kind of issue with the transporters? Yeah, take it out.

But in all of these examples, the bullet has to be inherently dangerous. For normal humans with normal bullets, its just a hunk of lead. 

Hope this helped some of you action writers out there!

Good luck and good writing!

Disclaimer: In the event that you or someone you know has been shot, the best thing to do for them is call for an ambulance and follow the instructions provided by the operator. This post is intended to give accurate writing advice to authors and script writers, but I am not a medical professional. While I do believe that the research that I’ve done on this topic is factually accurate, it should not be taken as actual medical advice.