#rnycommunity

I know it’s not #flashbackfriday anymore but this popped up on my #onthisday so here’s a #selfiesaturday… swipe for today’s #nomakeup transformation.
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#vsg #wls #bariatricsurgery #wlscommunity #weightloss #progressnotperfection #vsgcommunity #wlsjourney #gastricbypass #newlife #weightlossjourney #weightlosssupport #weightloss #rnyfamily #rouxeny #postop #onlyupfromhere #healthy #wlsfamily #wls #weightlosssurgery #weightlosscommunity #rny #rnycommunity #bariatricbabes #bariatriclife

Can we talk about my progress please?

Weight loss is weird.

I started my journey almost two years ago at about 315 lbs….Could have been higher…But…I hated the scale tremendously.

I now weigh 160 lbs…..And with clothes on I feel so sexy and powerful and confident.

BUT.

THIS IS THE REALITY OF WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY.

It’s hard.

It’s hard physically. It’s hard mentally. It’s hard socially…It’s just…..hard. Your life changes so drastically so quickly it’s difficult​ to keep up sometimes…. Quite exhausting really…..

BUTTTTTTTT. I will tell you this.

It gets easier. There is hope beyond the initial post surgery depression. There is happiness in your progress after your 5 week weight loss stall. There is peace once you break up with your scale and realize a number does not define your success. There is confidence in the new you who will propel you to new heights. There is life……There is life after this surgery.

Despite my many challenges, a surgery related near death experience…..Hair loss, extra skin…..An ended engagement and a variety of relationships post surgery…..My life now is better than it has ever been.

I guess what I’m trying to say is…..For anyone just starting out or who is stuck or just sad/regretful, as I was on many occasions……This will pass, and you will achieve the success you are striving for.

I have so much faith in you.

Stay smiling xox

Weight loss is not always rainbows and butterflies.

It isn’t always beautiful and perfect.

Losing weight isn’t always full of positivity and happiness.

There is sadness. There is pain….and there is body dysmorphia.

I wear clothes like the ones pictured above - I hide my new body because I am ashamed.

Why?

Because when I look in the mirror I don’t see the girl above….I see the girl who was 315 lbs. and scared….alone….feeling ugly and fat and horrific.

I look in the mirror and I do not see progress. I see the same thing I have always seen.

I am going to be starting therapy to address these issues…but I share these thoughts with you because I want you to know you aren’t alone.

When you are heavy your entire life…and you remember being weighed when you were four at preschool and you remember the number “65…..” …..and you remember the embarrassment as you kept getting bigger and bigger….and then you have this surgery and you start changing and your life starts changing and people start treating you differently…..all of this change doesn’t always translate into your head.

Bad body days are okay.

What isn’t okay is allowing it to continue.

Stay strong. Stay positive…..just like I am trying to do.

Who have I become?!

Hard to believe this girl was 130+ pounds heavier. So proud of myself.

#lovemycurves #lovemytool #lovemybody