between multiverse of madness, moon knight, harry’s house and stranger things, i’m going to be so annoying for the entire month of may. apologies in advance.
Warning- LONG CHAPTER, swearing, mentions of drugs, angst
Pairing- Steve Harrington x Hopper!reader
Episode- After season 2 & Before season 3
(Let me know if you wanna be tagged)
————
“Hello?”
One more coat.
You get closer to the mirror and partially close your eyes to carefully apply another coat of mascara so as to not stain your eyeshadow whilst you jam out to ‘Time of the Season’ by The Zombies, blasting in your headphones.
“Hello?!”
You pull away and admire yourself in the mirror and finally feel confident enough in the bathroom to begin dancing along to the music. That is until you manage to hear someone pounding on the door, after that you put your stuff away and open the door to see Hopper standing in front of the bathroom door.
“Why are you hogging up the—hey! Hey! What the hell are you wearing?!” He complains as you walk out. However, you don’t catch anything he says since your music is playing too loud. “Are you listening to me?! What are you wearing?!”
You try to grab a coat from your room, but while you walk towards the room you stop the moment you catch Eleven and Mike all giggly with each other as they press small kisses on each other. It’s disgusting.
Since Hopper was chasing after you to get an answer from you, he caught the couple and slammed the door open. “Hey! Stay apart!” He then continues to storm after you while you go to where he keeps his coats to grab a denim one with a black fur collar, even if it is baggy on you.
While you’re putting the coat on the song changes to ‘Big Love’ by Fleetwood Mac, and you only turn up the volume higher.
However, right as you turn around, you bump into Hopper, and he makes sure to pull off your headphones so you could finally hear him. “I’ve been talking to you!” He seethes and stands his ground right in front of you. “What the hell are you wearing?!”
“Oh,” you breathe out. “You have? I didn’t hear you.”
“Yeah,” he scoffs and throws you your headphones to your waiting hands. “I wonder why. You’re going to go deaf!”
You roll your eyes and try to walk off but he pulls you back and demands an answer for his question. “What are you wearing?”
You look down at your mini tight black dress, and the black sheer tights you wore on your legs under the dress. “A dress?” You clarify in a way that made it seem like he didn’t know.
Hopper steps back and wipes his mouth out of the disbelief he felt upon you saying that in his face as if it was nothing wrong. When it was to him. “That’s not a dress. That’s hardly fabric.”
You drop your shoulders and scoff. “No, it’s a dress, it’s in style right now. And I’m wearing tights. And your coat by the way. Mom let me wear it.”
Hopper scoffs and nods slowly but doesn’t give up. “Your mom. Your mom would! I’m not your mom, go change into something decent.”
You cross your arms over your chest and huff and stand your own ground. “No. Steve invited me to his celebration dinner. I don’t want to wear jeans to a restaurant. Besides,” you whisper as if your friend was here. “His parents are loaded, and he says his dad is mean so I’m too insecure to wear my clothes.”
Hopper’s jaw is left ajar as he thinks of what you told him, and instead of answering with anything logical he chooses to comment on something else. “Steve and you aren’t dating? Why should you go? Just go to the ceremony with a decent outfit and come back.”
You scoff and step back as if offended by his comment. “No, we’re not dating, but he’s my friend. We’re best friends, he wants me to go, I can’t just leave him hanging.” You walk past him to grab your purse and the gift bag, hearing Hopper walk after you.
“No. Wear something else.”
You huff and roll your eyes, but continue to head out the door with his keys in hand. “No. I’ll keep your coat on the entire time, promise!”
Hopper follows you and finally gives in, only because he was trying to not get in a fight with you. “Fine,” he groans, “but,” he makes himself clear whilst you throw him his keys. “The coat stays on the entire time! You hear me? If I smell alcohol on you I will forbid you from seeing Harrington again, got it?”
You don’t take his warning too seriously, but you agree before you put your headphones on so you could get going to the ceremony before you’re late.
——
“Okay, thanks,” you tell Hopper while you slide off the seat. “I’ll see you later.”
Before you can close the door, Hopper leans towards the passenger seat to tell you one last thing. “Y/N, I wanted to ask if you wanted to have dinner with me, I want to talk to you. I want to talk about…things.”
You step back and swallow thickly; it’s been a few months since Eleven closed the gate, since then Hopper and you have yet to talk, you are still at odds with him, you can’t really talk to him, or get along with him, you still feel resentment.
“I uh,” you mumble, unable to meet his eyes. “Okay. Sure. When?”
“Tomorrow?” He asks with hope.
You let your eyes meet his for a second to offer him a quick nod.
Hopper smiles and nods himself.
Now you’re able to close the car door and rush away from the parking lot to rush towards the field where the ceremony was taking place, and where Dustin was supposed to be at already to save you a seat.
At first though, it was way too crowded since other people wanted to find seats that it made it hard to walk without getting pushed. You only managed to pave your way through because you began shoving people too, it made finding Dustin a relief.
“Hey! Dustin!” You call as you rush to where he’s at.
Said boy stands up and waves with a grin on his face. “Y/N! You made it!”
“Yeah,” you sigh and sit down beside him. “Barely. There’s so many people it was impossible to fucking walk.”
“Well you made it, here.” He hands you a confetti popper.
You take it and shove it in your pocket before placing your stuff down to sit back as the ceremony starts.
“You pop it when we meet up, you understand?” Dustin tells you. “When we meet up, not a moment before or after.”
“Yeah,” you scoff. “I understand.”
Since the first half of the ceremony is just talking and filled with a copied speech from the valedictorian, Dustin and you hardly listen to any of it. Even as the first part of the students began walking up on stage your attention was still wavered, so you sat back and observed, you thought back to what Hopper told you after you got out of his car; The possibility of how that conversation could go.
You wanted things to get fixed, you told Eleven you would try, you told yourself you’d try as well. But you still had your doubts, you still could hear what your mother would tell you about him, you still felt your own resentment burn fiercely in your own heart.
Of course talking would extinguish that but, could a talk solve years of neglect?
“He’s coming up,” Dustin says, pulling you from deep within your thoughts. “He’s coming up!”
You stand up and for now let all your thoughts of Hopper just get pushed to the far depths of your mind for now, you instead grin brightly as you spot Steve waiting by the stairs for his name to be called.
“Steve Harrington.” The man calls through the microphone, causing you to jump out of pure bliss, clap as loud as you could and let out a loud whoop so he could hear you; whilst Dustin clapped and then whistled as loud as he could. And other students did clap too even if you were all told to save it for the end, but even through their claps Steve’s attention was still captivated by Dustin and you, he paused in his step for a little after he grabbed his diploma and smiled and waved in your direction before he walked away and his figure got lost in the sea of other students.
After that, the rest of the ceremony hardly mattered and didn’t last long, but there was one problem, you did get separated from Dustin on your way to find Steve.
“Oh just my fucking luck,” you grumble and swerve your way through the crowd with fustration beginning to bubble within you.
You looked up from the ground and scanned the faces of students to see if you could Steve, but before you could make it further albeit you ran into someone else also amongst the crowd of students and parents, Billy. He made sure you didn’t get past him.
“Hello, gorgeous,” he greets you smugly as he licks his lips and checks you out slowly.
You bite the inside of your cheek and offer him a small smile and a simple greeting. “Billy.” You exhale deeply and keep searching for Steve.
“What are you doing here?” He asks and places a cigarette in between his lips while he tries to hold your gaze.
“I’m here for Steve,” you tell him bluntly. “You?” You finally meet his gaze, noticing how his pupils were suddenly dilated as he kept looking at you.
“I’m here for no one important,” he shares with no remorse and steps closer towards you, making you hold your breath and step back.
“I thought we weren’t talking anymore,” you nervously share and exhale shakily in hope he’d leave you alone, even if his cologne smelled so good that you didn’t want him to leave so you could keep smelling it. “I mean, you know, needle?”
Billy scoffs and his smirk doesn’t falter. “Forgotten.” He steps closer towards you and this time you have to stay put since someone was behind you. “There’s a party later at Robert Duran’s place, come, we could…” he licks his lips and leans his head towards you to whisper against your lips. “Pick up where we left off.” He slowly grins and checks you out again.
“Leave the trash where it belongs.” He refers to Steve.
The corner of your lips twitch, but you manage to snicker and put on a feigned smile to lean closer to him this time. “I’ll see.” You step back and shoot him a sweet smile before you walk off towards Steve who is now close by.
“Steve!” You call out with excitement as you run towards him. “Steve!”
At the sound of his name, his head turns in your direction and when he finally spots you he doesn’t fail to grin all smugly. Once you’re in the clear you drop the gift bag and capture him in a tight embrace.
Now you were going to pull away right away so it didn’t feel weird to him, but he then hugged you back tightly. It made your smile widen and your grip tighten; his arms secured around you felt comforting.
It was a bummer that you needed to pull away.
“You came,” Steve says while he holds your shoulders and his eyes slowly travel down your body. “Y-you made it!”
Your eyebrows furrow slightly at his comment but you laugh and hold onto his biceps, “yeah. I mean why would I miss it? You’re my friend and you graduated! You made it! You beat the odds!”
Steve grins at you and nods. “I beat the odds!”
You then remember what you had in your pocket and pull away from him completely to pull out the confetti popper and pop it in his face with a sly grin. “I’m proud of you Steve!”
Steve blows air out to blow away the small confetti paper that fell down his face—“that got in my hair,” he complains.
Your eyes drift to him and then up to the one singular piece in his hair and you scoff. “One,” you point out and step towards him to pull it out of his hair. “One little piece.”
Steve’s eyes meet yours and he lifts his eyebrows and shrugs before he remarks. “It could have ruined my hair. I take precious time fixing it, you know.” He lets his eyes linger on you as you both don’t move away from one another.
You narrow your gaze on him and snort before sharing a look with Dustin and talking to him. “How long do you think he lasts in front of the mirror?”
“An hour,” Dustin laughs. “I think it takes him an entire hour.”
Steve steps back and sighs. “Wow, okay, I see how it is. It’s okay neither of you appreciate the hair.”
You walk back and pick your stuff off the ground and then shoot him a small teasing smile. “I appreciate it, I do, it’s just harmless fun, Stevie.”
Steve rolls his eyes and he’s going to add something witty but he then goes slightly serious when his parents finally find him. It gets awkward too, not only for Dustin and you but for Steve too, especially when his dad congratulated him.
“Well, mom, dad, these…” Steve begins to hesitate when he glances at Dustin. “…are my friends Dustin Henderson;” he looks over at you next, ignoring the offended look Dustin shoots him. “And this is Y/N Hopper.”
You smile at both of them and shake their hands whilst you also try to read the serious look Steve’s dad has expressed on his face.
“The chief’s daughter, huh?” His dad says. “I never knew he had an older girl.” He folds his arms over his chest.
“Yeah,” you scoff, “I can imagine why he kept me a secret.”
“Well,” Steve’s mother says with a sweet smile. “It’s nice to meet you y/n. It’s good that the chief isn’t alone.”
You draw in a deep breath and feign a smile to nod in agreement. Steve reads your discomfort and changes the conversation before his parents could ask more. “Well we should go now.” He begins walking ahead and Dustin and you follow at his side, but his mom interjects all of a sudden.
“Wait! Steve let me take a picture of you and your friends.”
Steve stops and sighs, he drops his head and seems to want to reject her but he turns slowly to face his mother. “Just one.”
His mother smiles and lifts her camera to turn it on and point at Steve. “Okay, y/n, Dustin stand by Steve,” she instructs.
Instead of posing right away you back away and shake your head with a shy smile. “No, it’s okay. If—”
“Shut up,” Steve cuts you off and walks to you to throw his arm around you, whilst Dustin stood by his other side with a toothy grin—“Smile,” Steve tells you and his hand around you tightens.
You glance at him and then look at the camera to smile sweetly right as his mom takes the picture and comments, “perfect! One more?”
Neither of you turn her down since Steve sees it makes her happy, but in that moment Dustin did glance at Steve and you and decided to discreetly step away so it would just be you and Steve grinning at the camera one last time.
——
Dinner.
There wasn’t much to say about dinner, just that Dustin didn’t end up joining. You couldn’t say it was much fun either, at all, the one person who made it worth staying was Steve, but even he seemed like he’d rather be somewhere else.
“So tell me y/n where were you before Hawkins?” Steve’s mother asks.
You shift in your seat and sigh, but you don’t think much of the memories that came with the question. “Uh, I was in Oregon, by the coast. Being here is uh, a real change,”
Steve snickers, “yeah, I mean how’s the sun feeling? I mean I hear that doesn’t exist over there.”
You tilt your head and set your fork down to feign a laugh, “ha! Yeah, yeah we don’t get a lot of sun over there, but I do miss the constant rain.”
Steve clears his throat and his eyes drift to his mom. “Y/N, here cliffs jump, I mean,” he looks back at you with a small smile. “How the hell do you do that? I can’t wrap my mind around it.”
You lean towards him and smile. “Yeah, it’s hard because the water there is cold, but it’s worth it, and we don’t jump from too high, it is such a rush though! We’ll have to do it. I mean you should come visit Oregon with me some time.”
“You know,” Steve says and folds his arms over his chest. “I’d rather keep my insides, you know inside, thank you.”
“I mean there are like baby cliffs,” you assure him with a teasing grin. “Where you know kids jump from. You can jump from those, they’re like,” you measure the height with your hand. “An inch or two from the water. Or I can hold your hand Stevie.”
Steve’s head tilts and he shoots you a forced smile while he nods his head and says, “yeah. Yeah alright. Hopper you know you can’t even drive so.”
You fix your posture and narrow your gaze. “I think that one is a little too far.”
“Yeah,” Steve breathes out. “Sorry.”
“I think Steve should be worried about what he’s going to do with the rest of his life,” his father cuts off your lighthearted conversation.
Steve’s smile falls completely and he grabs his fork again to continue eating and keep his gaze focused on his food with his jaw clenched.
“You, y/n, do you have any plans?” He now directs at you.
You also pick up your fork and play with your food though. “I have ideas,” you answer, “I graduate next year so I have time, but I do have a college picked out. If that doesn’t work out I like the idea of maybe something to do with the law.” You glance at him and share a tightlipped smile, earning a small nod but causing Steve to earn a glare and another snide comment.
“Maybe Steve can learn from you.”
Said man sighs and just swallows thickly, choosing to stay quiet instead of talking back.
You however answer for him. “I think that what Steve is doing is a good idea too. I mean he’s young, life when you’re young is about the unknown, or that’s what my aunt says.” You smile genuinely and keep your gaze focused on his parents, missing the admiration Steve was looking at you with as you defended him against his dad. “Steve will get to experience other things some adults never get to do in their entire lives. He’ll navigate life, gain experiences and choose what he wants when he finds it. I think that’s smart too, we wouldn’t want him to regret his major or career right?
You finally glance over at Steve, and notice that he’s already looking at you but you can’t think too much into it, no matter how soft his look was—it was just a look of gratitude, the same gratitude he expressed when he mouthed “thank you.”.
Even if that look, the way his brown eyes gleamed at this moment after hearing such dull talks from his father made your heart swell, smile.
“That’s nice, y/n.” Steve’s mother said, breaking Steve and you from your lingering stare.
You look over at her and smile, noticing his father just huffed and continued eating without anything else to add, leaving an awkward atmosphere clinging around the table.
*LATER*
“Now that we’re alone I do finally want to give you your present,” you reveal to Steve as you walk down the sidewalk to his car with ice cream cups in your hands. “I didn’t want to give it to you before because well it’s not that big of a deal.” Your eyes drift to the side as you push the gift bag towards him. “Congratulations, Steve.” You smile.
Steve glances at it for a second before he meets your eyes and brushes his hair back with his fingers to then take the present from you. He then proceeds to stop first to hand you his cup when you stop before him to watch him slowly open the present with a faint smile on his lips.
“Look, Hopper, I’ll tell ya, if you try to, I don’t know upstage me, we’re gonna have problems.” He says with a nervous laugh as he removes the tissue paper from the bag.
You scoff and grin. “I can’t possibly do that if you haven’t gifted me anything.”
Steve pauses before he could reach the present and his eyes drift up to you as he licks his lips and huffs out through his nose. “Yeah, what about that awesome mixtape?”
“Not a gift. It’s like a gesture, because we’re friends. You said you would too so it doesn’t count.” You tell him, making him put his hand on his hip and bore his eyes into yours.
“Not a gift? I took hours doing that, it’s a gift.” He shakes his head and focuses back on getting the present out of the bag. And when he does and realizes how small and squared it is his eyes flicker to you and he whispers. “If this is some prank, I swear—”
He suddenly cuts himself off and he drops the bag while his jaw drops and his eyes snap back to you when he finally sees what the box contained. All you could respond with is a cheeky smile.
“Uh,” he breathes out softly and keeps looking between the watch and you. “What is this?”
“A watch,” you click your tongue as if it wasn’t obvious. “You see the little hands, the numbers—”
“It was a rhetorical question,” he snaps back and takes the watch out of the box to check out the dark brown leather band, and the gold detailing. “This looks expensive, how much—”
“No,” you cut him off. “Just don’t worry about it.” You point to the watch with your occupied hands. “It’s a graduation present, and uh, thank you present, for being my friend and saving my ass.” You grin at him and shrug. “I won’t take it back. It’s yours.”
Steve presses his tongue against the inside of his cheek, his eyes averting from you and focusing on the watch. He takes a moment to himself to gather his thoughts before he just says. “It would’ve been cooler if this had like a laser, you know.” He picks up the gift bag and then lets his eyes slide up to you to continue. “Just a thought.”
An amused laugh escapes you, causing Steve to smile at himself—“Like in case we cross into more danger?” You finish for him with a grin. “Like a demo-dog?”
“Yes!” Steve exclaims happily. “Like surprise I have a laser in my watch that can kill you bastards!”
You hand Steve back his cup of ice cream when he puts his present back in the bag and then add, “but what if you’re with a girl and you or her accidently hit the trigger.” You suck in air through your teeth and continue walking.
“Yeah, no, not ideal,” he agrees. “I’d take it off. Or show it off.” He smirks at you and hits your shoulder. “That wouldn’t impress you?”
You press your lips together and begin swirling your ice-cream as you think of his answer. “Hmm….I think it depends on the guy. But,” you say and then eat the last spoonful of ice-cream. “We’re getting too sidetracked.” You swallow back thickly and continue. “I wanted to tell you that I will be going to Oregon next week. Until July.”
“Wait,” Steve scoffs and blinks repeatedly. “Until July? But that’s like for like two months.” He stops and you’re forced to stop. “Why?”
Why is he so concerned all of a sudden?
“My friends surprised me with a ticket,” you answer him hesitantly and with confusion. “I thought it would be a good idea, I mean to see them for a bit. To visit my mom.” You sigh and blink and can’t help but notice his displeasure to your leave. “Why does it matter? Will you miss me?” You tease him.
Steve albeit just rolls his eyes, causing you to laugh.
“I think you need more friends Harrington,” you continue to tease him. This time he scoffs while he tilts his head and glares at you.
“I have friends!” He proclaims, sounding almost offended.
“Okay,” you snicker, “who? You can not say Dustin.”
Steve places his hand on his hips and looks away to think of an answer to your question. Albeit he takes too long so you answer for him. “Exactly.”
“Alright! Little miss popular,” he snaps back. “Tell me your list of friends here in Hawkins, don’t name the kids.”
You step back and keep the grin on your face since it wasn’t hard for you to name one person. “Jonathan.”
Steve snickers, “when’s the last time you hang out with him?”
You part your lips to defend yourself, but he was right, you haven’t hung out with Jonathan in a while, Steve knows that right away.
“Exactly!”
You ignore him and continue walking and push his shoulder with yours as you smirk at him. “You will miss me. Cute. Well,” you sigh, but feel your heart racing at the fact he didn’t deny it. “At least you can go job hunting now. Without getting distractions since Dustin is leaving too. You’ll be able to pursue…girls,” you roll out slowly, almost not wanting to say it since the thought did slightly upset you.
“Meh.”
You throw your cup in the nearby trash and look at the ground as you question his comment. “Meh?”
Steve stays quiet for a second.
“I think,” he says after a few seconds. “I’ll try finding a job first….” His eyes flicker to you but you don’t notice. “Just to figure myself out.”
“Oh,” you sigh. “That’s nice.”
“You.” He swallows thickly. “Are you reuniting with some old boyfriend there? In Oregon?”
“No.” You shake your head. “They’re all just good childhood friends. We don’t date within the friend group. But….uh…Billy did invite me to a party at Robert Duran’s place today.” You mention and now share a quick look before he looks away.
“Oh. Oh. Well you know how I feel about him. Mhmm, I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
You huff out and nod. “Yeah, I wasn’t going. He said we could start off where we left off, but after what he did to you, the kids, I just can’t see him the same. I’m in search for…a…good guy now.”
Steve nods along to your comment and stays quiet. You stay quiet and reach his car with that same silence still hanging over your heads.
That is until you remember what you had hidden in your bag. “Steve! I remembered…” you pause as you get into the passenger seat and then proceed to pull out a long rectangular mascara box. “Look!” You show off.
“Makeup? I told you I won’t let you do it again.”
You pull out the lid and tilt the box to let a rolled up blunt fall on your palm.
“Whoa!” He exclaims. “Nice! It’s another present?”
You shake your head immediately. “No. But we can smoke it together, call it a celebratory smoke session! Hopper did say I can’t smell like alcohol but he never said anything about marijuana. And I know how to hide my trail.” You smirk and offer it to Steve first. “So, you up for it?”
——
*A FEW YEARS AGO*
“Okay, goodnight,” Hopper whispers and stands up from his crouched position by your bed to try and head towards the door.
“No!” You stop him. “Daddy, will you be here when I wake up?”
The last time you had been with him, you had fallen asleep next to him and when you woke up he was gone, you were on your way home without him.
Your dad turns and props his hand on the doorframe to share an assuring smile with you. “I will. I’ll be here, I promise.”
“Pinky promise?” You ask and lift your head to see him better.
Your dad walks over to you and crouches beside your bed to outstretch his hand out and offer you his pinky.
Without hesitance you pull out your own hand from under your blanket and hook your pinky around his.
“I pinky promise,” he assures you.
You giggle and lay your head back down after he pulls away and tries to head out again.This time though you stop again to blurt out something else to try and keep him with you longer. “Wait, daddy, I can’t sleep.”
Your dad scoffs and retorts. “Well you haven’t tried. Close your eyes and try.”
You huff and sit up, earning a loud sigh when he spots you.
“I’m serious y/n. Sleep.”
You turn on the lamp beside your bed and crawl to the edge of your bed to do the opposite of what he asked of you. “A few more minutes? Read to me. Or can we listen to music?” You clasp your hands together and bat your eyelashes. “Please.”
Your dad’s eyes fall to the ground and his hands go on his hips as he stays quiet after he lets out another loud sigh from his nose.
“One song,” he offers bluntly. “One song.”
You squeal and jump out off your bed to run to him to grab his hand and pull him to the living room so he could play a song.
“Okay, what song? Choose wisely.” He asks.
You run to the stand to instantly pick out a song without so much as thinking of it. “This one!” You give him the album and he sighs but he doesn’t fight your choice, he puts it on and changes it to the song he knew you wanted, “Funny Valentine” by Frank Sinatra.
When the song begins to play, you grin brightly and put a hand behind your back and then offer your dad your other one like how you saw in the movies. “You want to dance with me?”
Your dad looks down at you and even if he didn’t like the fact that you were breaking the rules, he couldn’t help but smile at you over how adorable he thought you were asking him such a question.
“It would be my pleasure,” he can’t help but give in to your offer. “Come here,” he says while he picks you off the ground so he wouldn’t have to bend down and you wouldn’t have to tiptoe to reach him. He continues to gently caress your face and press a kiss on your forehead before he whispers, “I missed you, you know that? But you do this again and I will have to take away your toys.”
You only giggle and cup his cheek with your little hand. “I missed you too, Daddy.” You then let your hand slide down so you could let it hang around his neck while you dropped your head on his shoulder and snuggled it up against the crook of his neck.
He begins swaying along to the music with a smile of pure, blissful contentment.
——
You check the time on your watch out of nerves and then glance at the menu that hid your face from Hopper.
“What are you going to get?” He breaks the silence. “I could let you get dessert for dinner. You’d alway beg me to let you have a slice of cake instead of eating real food.”
“I’m getting a burger,” you answer dryly. You clear your throat and change the conversation. “We should take Eleven something, I doubt she’s going to eat at Mike’s house.”
“I’ll do it before we leave.”
You answer with silence and keep looking at the menu to keep avoiding Hopper. Regretfully, the waitress came to get your orders and took the menus with her, leaving you completely vulnerable to a smiling Hopper.
“Jonathan and you,” he starts off awkwardly. “Why don’t you guys hangout? Didn’t you say he was your friend?”
You shrug. “He has a girlfriend now. It would be awkward if I third wheel.” You grab your straw that’s inside your coke bottle and begin awkwardly swirling it around.
Hopper notices how bored and annoyed you were and it began to bug him, but he remembered that Joyce told him he needed patience, so he kept trying to stick to that.
“Oregon, are you…excited to go back?” He asks instead, finally receiving a partial glance.
“Yeah,” you answer with a very faint smile on your face.
Hopper clasps his hands on top of the table top and continues. “Do your friends and you have any plans?”
“Nope,” you keep the answers short and dry.
However, it was your dry answer that finally makes him give up on the small talk and get straight to the subject. Disregarding completely the patience he was told to have with you.
“Okay, okay,” he exhales deeply and leans in. “Let’s talk then. Tell me what you feel about me.”
He started off wrong. Completely wrong, he didn’t note that, but you did.
“What I feel?” You ask slowly out of bafflement.
“I mean all I’m getting right is short answers, eye rolls, and avoidance. So just give it to me straight.” He explains himself, triggering the anger that was left untouched up to this moment.
“What kind of question is that?” You spat. “Don’t you have something to say first?” You narrow your eyes on him and lean towards him to then put your hands on the tabletop. “I mean it’s been five years since nothing. Aren’t you going to say that you’re sorry?” You scoff and don’t let him answer, that stupid question infuriated you. “But if you want to hear what I feel about you, dad,” you enunciate slowly. “I don’t like you. You left me. Even before Sarah died, you left me.”
Tears cloud your eyes and you could feel your throat burning, but you ignore it. You ignore the look of hurt, but of understanding on his face.
“Why? Huh? I always asked myself that every birthday you missed, every call I didn’t get, every letter that I failed to get back.” You clench your jaw and sniffle as you try your best to keep in your tears. “I loved you. I looked up to you. And you would ignore me. I would defend you against my mom because she’d say mean stuff about you. I’d tell myself that you’re too busy to call, to write me back, to come pick me up. That is until you cut me off completely. After that I would just pretend I didn’t have a dad. He was dead, it helped me forget what I felt….”
Hopper blinks, his jaw slightly drops as he drew in a shaky breath of disbelief.
You clasp your hands together on the table and lean back, you avert your gaze and wipe your tears away.
“It…” he mutters, “it was never my intention to stop talking to you, or connect with you. One your…mother actually sent all my letters back each time, two, after Sarah died I just couldn’t, I fell apart.”
The letters. Yeah you knew that.
“I get that,” you assure him. “I get that Sarah’s death hurt, but did you ever stop to think that I needed you? She was my sister too. After her funeral you cut me off completely, it hurt, I needed you.” Your voice breaks and tears start streaming down your cheeks now. “I-I was your daughter too. I needed you.” You cry out shakily and take a moment to breathe to somewhat calm down to continue.
“I’d call you, I’d wait for your call each day before it turned to every week, every month until I got tired of waiting. I mean I never even got a call after you took in Eleven.” You look up at him and see his eyes were dry, his bottom lip was in between his teeth, but he appeared calm. Unaffected. “If my mom wouldn’t have died and I wasn’t forced to come live with you, would you have even told me about her? Or would you have forgotten about me and replaced me? Because I saw the way you looked at her, I saw the way you hugged her, if I didn’t come live with you would you have even tried to reconnect with me?”
“It’s not her fault,” Hopper defends Eleven. “I could never—”
Before he could finish his sentence, the waitress comes back with your food, she sets the plates down awkwardly when she notices the tension and makes sure to leave quickly, but her interruption completely broke the atmosphere. She left you to eat in an uncomfortable and tension filled silence. You could see Hopper wanted to pick up where he left off, but you made sure he knew you were avoiding him.
After the food was finished he ordered something for Eleven and ordered the slice of cake he had mentioned, but you left it untouched, you kept your mouth shut and struggled with your uneasiness, with the weight in your chest and the stinging lump in your throat. You felt like you had a lot to say, but you couldn’t speak at the same time.
“I’m going to the bathroom,” Hopper finally interjected through the silence. “I’ll be back to continue our conversation.”
You hum and once you see he’s out of sight you pull the slice of cake towards you to begin to pick at, going completely unaware of the unexpected third guest until he sat down in front of you.
“I didn’t expect to run to you here.”
You look up and see Billy where Hopper once sat.
“What do you want?” You ask bluntly and take a bite of cake. “Why don’t you return to your friends Billy. I’m here with my dad.”
“I see that,” he says and hangs his arm over this seat. “You didn’t go yesterday.”
“I was with Steve.” You glance at him and notice a cockier look on his face now at the mention of Steve’s name. “My friend.”
“You’re upset,” he brings up without hesitation. “What’s wrong?”
You scoff and feign a smile. “Why do you care? Look I think what happened back in November was a clear sign that we aren’t friends anymore. I’m not another one of those girls that will throw themselves at you when you flash a pretty smile, so leave me alone.”
Billy swallows thickly, his eyes drift away but rather than walking off and leaving you alone, he tilts his head and exhales to keep pestering you. “I know you aren’t like the other girls. I told you that you aren’t.” He smirks, obviously wanting to impress you after you referenced his smile as pretty, and then leans in with his eyes trying to hold yours. “Are you okay?”
You drop your eyes and sigh deeply. “No. Dad trouble…” you pause and let your eyes drift up to him to offer a very faint smile. “Thank you for asking. Billy. For whatever ulterior motive you are asking.” You huff out and begin tapping your fingers on the table.
“Dad’s can be a pain in the ass, I know,” he shares, causing your hostility towards him to falter.
Once again a huff escapes your nose and a genuine smile appears on your face as you agree. “Yeah.” You hold his gaze for a moment, just a moment until Hopper appears by the table.
“Let’s go, y/n.” He says bluntly, sparing a side glance at Billy.
You don’t hesitate to stand up and grab the to go bag, hesitating just to hear what Billy had to say. “I’ll see you around.”
You roll your eyes and nod slowly as you mutter out, “sure.” After one last spared glance you follow after Hopper in the same silence that had loomed before. Now it was just a bit more awkward thanks to Billy. It lurked inside the car for a while until Hopper parked just a mile before you could reach Mike Wheeler’s house to pick up Eleven.
The random spot wasn’t like some pretty view, there was a bunch of trees surrounding the road, but it was lonely, perfect to continue the conversation.
“I’m sorry,” he finally says in a genuine and a upset way. “I was a shitty deadbeat dad, I know,” he exhales shakily and avoids looking over at you. “And I am sorry. After Sarah died I just decided that you were better off without me. I didn’t…” he pauses and inhales deeply to let out another shaky exhale. “Want that black hole to swallow you like it swallowed Sarah. The same black hole that I brought upon her, cause that’s what I am, a curse. You didn’t need me. I didn’t…I didn’t want to lose you too, so I left you.”
Your bottom lip trembles and you want to hold in your cry, but you can’t hold so much within your heart, you had to let out those built up emotions that have been disregarded for years. You had to let that weight go before it completely crumbled you.
“I could never replace you baby, never ever.” He continues to assure you. “I just couldn’t expose Eleven over the phone, it was too dangerous. I wanted to tell you, I did, but everytime I picked up the pen to tell you I thought of Sarah and I just couldn’t…I couldn’t put you at risk. I couldn’t lose you too. But there was not a single day that went by that I didn’t miss you, that I didn’t worry about you, I love you, I loved you every day that went by. I know that’s not enough, but I hope that it’s a start to earning your forgiveness.”
You prop your elbow on the doors armrest and wipe your tears off your face as you try to compose yourself after breaking into a sob.
“I don’t plan on leaving you ever again,” he continues with his own voice quivering. “Not anytime soon.”
Finally after you could breathe propely you look over at him and hear him continue one last time.
“I’m sorry.” He stretches his hand out so you could hold it.
At first you glance at it and then you meet his eyes to add your one thought. “I…can’t just forget what you did in one day, but I do…I want to start forgiving you. And if it’s any condolence. I never hated you, okay? Never. I was just angry. Okay? I will try though, I will try to forgive you, one day at a time. I will put in an effort in mending our relationship ” You finish and take his hand in yours.
Your dad sighs in relief and smiles whilst tears roll off his cheeks. “That’s all I ask.”
You smile through your tears and rather than staying put you unbuckle your seatbelt and reach over to embrace him, to hold him close and feel the comfort of his arms you’ve missed for years.
“I missed you,” you whisper.
Hopper scoffs and holds you tight in his arms, he presses a kiss on the side of your head and keeps his lips pressed against your head to whisper back. “I did too…” he swallows thickly and breathes out, “my little valentine…”
A soft laugh escapes your lips and you hold him tighter in the comfortable silence that lingered after. It was a few minutes after that you did need to add one thing after you began to pull away. “But there is some ground rules that we need to discuss. I am almost eighteen, this curfew thing you have for Eleven can’t imply on me. All I ask is twelve thirty.”
Your dad wipes his tears off his face and scoffs with a more forced smile on his face. “Eleven thirty.”
“Twelve,” you offer confidently with no sign of any more wagering.
Hopper glances out the window, his hand pulling away from yours to grab the steering wheel as he really fought to accept your offer.
“Fine,” he deadpans. “But you cannot hang out with that guy that you were talking to at the diner. Harrington is the exception because of what he’s done. But even he’s a stretch.”
You huff out in amusement and assure his worry. “Don’t worry about Billy. He’s old news.”
Hopper rests his chin on the steering wheel and exhales deeply. “Okay. Okay. Fine. Twelve.” His eyes drift to you. “As long as you keep trying to work things out. And there’s a dress code. Deal?”
You smile and agree. “No to the dress code, but yes to the latter. Deal?”
Her eyes seem to be on you, but right as you walk towards her Mike pushes past you to reach Eleven first.
“Mike.” She says before they envelope each other in a big hug.
Their words between one another don’t register since you’re a bit too focused on the fact that she completely ignored everyone else to focus on Mike, and on the obvious change of her appearance. More specifically on her eyeliner she had on.
She looked badass but strange at the same time.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were there? you were okay?” You hear Mike ask Eleven. But instead of having her answer Hopper interjects.
“Because I wouldn’t let her.” He walks towards her and past you too. “What the hell is this? Where the hell have you been?”
“Where have you been?” She asks right back before they hug.
They hug, with so much love. That connection they had you could see it, everyone could, it was impossible to miss it, it was impossible to twist any other way. It hurt.
