a/n: this is so so, so heavily unedited but i wanted to get the next chapter out for you guys…. even if it’s just a bit of fluffy filler. but whatever right! but yes, i think there will be a bit of a delay on the next chapter too just cuz of how life is lol but i hope you guys enjoy this!!
Three days had passed since your fateful meeting with Rintaro, and in those three days you hadn’t seen him once. You had only worked once as well, and it was a morning shift, wondering if that was why you never saw him. When you saw him last, you cursed yourself as you locked your apartment door, realizing you’d never given him your phone number, decreasing the odds that you’d ever see him again.
Yet, when you arrived for your first night shift in three days, Alex was there waiting for you, ready with interesting news.
“I think you have a stalker,” they said, with a bit of a dry laugh, trying not to freak you out. Raising your head to look at your coworker, you let them continue. “Some guy keeps coming in asking for you, I was kinda nervous it was Osamu related so I tried not to give that many details.”
“What did he look like?” You inquired, heart starting to skip a beat. If it wasn’t Rintaro, then you were in a lot of trouble.
Alex tapped their chin, recalling the details: “tall, taller than your ex. Light brown hair, it was styled a little oddly, very flowy you could say.” That must’ve been him. It was reassuring to know that he did want to see you again. Alex continued, “he had these piercing eyes y’know I don’t know how to describe them. He’s been coming every night and for what? Like the last three days, and every time I look at those eyes I get chills.”
You were practically too stunned to speak as Alex raised their eyebrow. “Should I, like, file a police report or something? Do you know this guy?”
“Yeah, I do.” You felt yourself getting stomach butterflies. “Well, not well at least– I only briefly met him but he’s a really good guy.”
“If you say so,” Alex chuckled lightly, “but maybe give him your phone number next time you see him, y’know so the two of you communicate normally.” It was almost as if they could read your mind, knowing that you were regretting not having done so earlier.
About half an hour passed and still no customers came in. Sometimes, on weekdays it was like this: a ghost town. Tapping your fingers against the counter top, you thought you were going to die of boredom with Alex reciprocating your feelings.
Listening to them groan about waiting to just close up early, you were about to agree when the bell chimed and someone walked in.
Following his similar patterns from the night before, your friend Rintaro standing there wearing a black overcoat, and an attire you could only sum up to Wall Street-esc while his hair was still as wild as the first night you met him.
The moment he looked up at you, you met his eyes and even though Alex had made it clear there was something off with his eyes, you couldn’t understand what they were talking about. His gaze was kind, and his lips slowly but surely tugged into a smile upon seeing you.
“Looks like Mr. Stalker is here,” Alex teasingly whispered into your ear. You nudged them playfully, leaning against the counter, widening your grin.
“Hey,” you breathed out.
“Hello.” Rintaro cleared his throat, “I’m glad to see you’re in today, I was looking for you since the last time we met.”
“Me too, I didn’t know when I’d see you again honestly,” you laughed, regretting the way you phrased it, not wanting to sound rude. “But I mean it’s okay, you’re here now.”
“I apologize, I didn’t mean to make you stressed.” But you quickly interrupted him, reminding him that it was alright.
“Can I get you anything? Maybe coffee or tea?” But Rintaro shook his head, insisting that he didn’t drink anything of the sort.
“I’ll have something sweet, though, whatever you recommend,” he said haphazardly looking at the display case of desserts. You nodded, mentioning you had just the thing.
Watching as Rintaro found a seat, running one pale hand over the other. He mindlessly stared out the window, waiting for you to bring him something. He hoped that you wouldn’t notice how nervous he felt.
The sound of a plate sliding against the table echoed through the empty cafe, catching the man’s attention as he looked at your beaming face. In front of him was a small slice of apple pie, the cinnamon smell filling the air between you.
“On the house,” you said smiling, eyes slowly trailing over to the empty chair in front of him.
“You can sit if you want,” Rintaro offered and you felt embarrassed that he caught you red handed. You explained that your shift was almost over, looking back to see Alex’s sign of approval as you made yourself comfortable.
“I was thinking about how stupid I was not asking you for your number,” you bring up, not wanting to directly ask for it, still feeling a little shy.
Shaking his head, Rintaro informed you, “it wouldn’t have been of any use, I don’t have a phone.” Taking a bit of the pie he hummed, not saying anything to follow up his previous statement. “This is really good, it’s been a while since I ate anything…. this sweet, of course.”
“Wait, what do you mean you don’t have a cellphone? Who our age doesn’t?” That question caught Rintaro by surprise, raising an eyebrow as he tried not to act suspicious, taking yet another fork-full of pie into his mouth.
He simply shrugged, trying to change the subject, “is your shift almost over?”
You looked at your watch about to say no, when Alex’s voice interjected. “She’s gonna leave early, I can manage the place on my own.” They winked at you, signaling that you should go with him.
“I’ve heard good things about a bar nearby, would you like to come with me? Maybe we can become better acquainted?”
“Sounds good.”
The bar was dimly lit and filled with a sad crowd, which was mostly middle aged men desperately not wanting to go home to their wives. Because of that there was a gloomy feeling but Rintaro surely made up for it, with a slight smile.
As the two of you ordered, asking all sorts of personal questions and if you knew any better, you would’ve thought it was a date. Sipping on the drink, you followed his inquiries with your own, asking Rintaro about his childhood. Although, his answers were always so cryptic.
“I haven’t really lived in one place long,” he explained.
“So you were a military kid, huh?” But Rintaro shook his head but as you looked at him in confusion he changed the motion into a nod.
“Something like that,” he said, changing his answer.
Drink after drink, you hadn’t realized how much you had until you looked at the clock and three hours had passed. Your legs felt wobbly, like you were about to fall over at any given moment, leaning your head against Rintaro. You were drunk, the first time in a while considering Osamu hated it when you went out to go clubbing with your friends.
“You should probably get home,” Rintaro pointed out as if it wasn’t obvious. He looked down at your pouting lips and droopy eyes, he had to take you home, he knew that but he couldn’t stop looking at you. Every time he blinked he could see your past life, in a similar position, his heart feeling a foreign swelling.
He paid for all your drinks without a second thought, putting his sturdy arm around your waist, letting you lean your weight onto him. He grunted, trying to get you to follow his steps but he realized that trying to get the attention of a drunk person was easier said than done. Yet, he knew your apartment was close enough that he would carry you if he needed to.
“This way,” he eased you gently and before he knew it, the two of you were outside your apartment building. Suna had to coax you to get your keys out and to punch in the apartment code which after a scary amount of failed attempts, you were finally let in.
“Tonight was so much fun,” your words were slurred as you nuzzled into the crook of his neck, smelling the expensive cologne he wore.
“I enjoyed it too, maybe we should do something similar but more formally, like as a date?” The last part of his statement was more of a whisper, scared that you were uncomfortable with getting into a relationship after just getting out of one. He also was praying that by tomorrow morning your memories of the night would be hazy and hard to remember.
“Yes, I want that,” you muttered, rubbing your eyes harshly, “I wanna go to bed,” you groaned. Rintaro nodded, promising that the two of you would be there as soon as the elevator rang, bringing the two of you to your destination.
“I just wanna sleep!” You exclaimed, trying to rip off your shirt. Your friends had always told you that you were a bit of a messy drunk but you never wanted to believe them. Nevertheless, you struggled to strip out of your clothes, not even bothering to acknowledge the fact that Rintaro was still inside your apartment.
Standing in the kitchen, you felt a hand on your back, reminding you that he was there. He suggested going into your bedroom and you hazily nodded, stumbling forward.
“May I help you with that?” Rintaro asked and you were in such a struggle, there was nothing else for you to do other than nod and accept his aid. He removed your shirt, leaving you in just a bra as you covered up.
“Okay now turn around.” You could feel the heat rising to your face, watching as he complied. You took out your pajama shirt, sliding off your bra before putting it on. “Okay you can look now.”
By then, you were wiggling out of your work pants, sitting down on the bed. You shivered as the cold air nipped your skin.
“You should get some rest,” he sat down next to you, seeing how cold you were, “perhaps underneath the bedding?”
“You talk so politely, y’know?” You drunkenly snickered, poking his thigh, “but I like it, I feel like an old timey princess.” Rintaro laughed softly, pulling back the duvet as you rolled yourself underneath the sheets.
“Well you deserve to be treated as such, no?” You only hummed with a content smile as just as Rintaro thought his work was done, he went to stand up, feeling you reach for his arm.
“No, don’t go yet, please stay.”
Rintaro looked at you, not knowing what to say, he saw the way your eyes became glossy and he couldn’t say no. This was his chance to be the shoulder you cried on, to bring you comfort that he couldn’t in your past life. He hadn’t realized he’d been staring until he heard your quiet whimper, taking his cold hand into your own.
“Of course,” he said in a soft tone, his voice hushed. Laying down next to you, he tried to take it slow so as to not shake you too much as his weight made the bed dipped.
“I just don’t wanna be alone tonight, y’know?” The man wanted to tell you that you didn’t have to explain yourself, he wouldn’t mind staying until you fell asleep but before he could interject, you finished your thought. “I’ve just been having nightmares all week,” you frowned, “I just wanted to feel safe.”
Few times in his life did Rintaro get the feeling he did then: you felt safe around him? Yet he didn’t ponder on it long, reeling himself back into the other thing you mentioned.
“Nightmares, what sort of nightmares?” His eyebrows furrowed.
“Mmm, I don’t know, there’s a big fire, and you’re there too.” Rintaro could hardly make out your words as you drifted into sleep. He knew it was memories of a past life, and he cursed himself that only the painful ones returned and plagued your sleep. He silently wished you’d see all the better ones.
He didn’t have a chance to answer, seeing as you had quickly fallen into slumber. He contemplated leaving, he needed to get back to his own place before the sun rose, surely you would come to understand.
As he stood up, he pressed a kiss against your forehead, seeing how innocent you lay there, unknowing of the life you had been born into. “Sweet dreams,” he whispered, but it was more like a prayer. He would give you the world if you wanted, even more, he would fight against the nature of his being and lasso the sun if you asked.
you two stepped into the cramped train, coming from the airport after a very long flight. though you both opted to take a taxi, the queue for the taxi was way worse than the waiting time for the cramped train.
“i‘m tired.” you mumble to your boyfriend, looking up at him with your eyes attempting to blink the sleep away.
“me too angel.” he whispers, bending down as he presses a kiss to your forehead.
with suna‘s right hand, he holds the luggage you both brought. it‘s a large black suitcase, and his back pack is on top of it, he holds it very securely. meanwhile his left is laid at the small of your back, kept there to hold you close, and to fend off predators.
“i feel like i can sleep standing up.” you say with a chuckle, but it‘s not a joke. with the fatigue from the long flight, the cramped train, and jet lag: you do believe you can sleep like this.
“that sucks.” suna mumbles, as though he doesn‘t care. but his eyes are already looking around the train for free seats, or seats that will be freed with the next stop. “we‘re going to be here for another hour or so,”
“i know.” you mumble into his chest, filling your senses with his smell, rather than the smell of the train that‘s making you feel worse. “just wanna sleep.” you add further.
suna looks at you, his hand moving to the back of your head, running his fingers through your scalp and softly caressing you. his lips then press another kiss to your forehead.
“you can lean on me and sleep, i‘ll hold you.” he whispers to you, his hands moving back to the small of your back. his hand pats your skin softly, lulling you to sleep.
“but you‘re tired too,” you softly say into his chest, worried for him. but he simply shakes his head and presses one more kiss, but this time to your temple.
“it‘s okay, i can sleep at home.” he assures you, his hands moving up and down your back for comfort. usually, you‘d protest more, but due to your fatigue, you simply nod.
suna watches you softly, smiling to himself before he presses one last kiss to your forehead. he himself might be tired, but he would rather be standing there sleepy and looking out for you, rather than to let you stand there tired with him.
because he, no matter what happens, suna rintaro promises he will always look after you.
warnings: bad writing, cheating, angst, both y/n and rin aren’t that good of people in this :(
a/n:in my angsty era again </3 reposting bc my tags weren’t working. anways this was inspired by (you guessed it) another mitski song! a loving feeling by mitski.
what do you do with a loving feeling?
or more importantly, what do you do with a loving feeling that comes from suna rintaro?
nowadays, you tend to ask yourself that question more often — if not everyday. it’s not as if you’re not used to feeling loved, you are, but almost all the time it’s platonic. and you’re starting to think that’s the problem.
because you know you’re never gonna get used to this sight in front of you.
for everyone else around you, the sight may be a pleasant, endearing, and might even put a smile to elderly couples’ faces as they reminisce about their own youthful days. but to you, it just leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.
because in front of you is suna rintaro with the girl he’s in love with. staring into her eyes deeply as she does the same to him, hand in hand and nuzzling their noses. that girl isn’t you. and that’s the problem.
and although it shouldn’t be a problem for you, since you said it was okay for him to pursue her, it is, because here you are at his and her engagement party, with a gift in your hand and a (fake) smile on your face for the ‘newest fiancés in town.’
it’s pitiful, really.
you should be happy for him. after all, he’s with the girl he loves so deeply, even if that girl isn’t you. you promised him that you’d eventually find your own happiness even if that means she wouldn’t be the root of it anymore. (if anything, he’s probably caused you more heart aches than happiness). besides, the relationship between the two of you (as rintaro would say even though you know it wasn’t true) was platonic. but shouldn’t your feelings be taken seriously as well?
honestly. suna rintaro is quite bold, considering the fact that he willingly invited you to his engagement party. you figured he might just be some sort of sadist. but does that make you a masochist for actually attending it?
for starters, you and rintaro have been in a, well — situationship. it started 6 months ago when him and his girlfriend (now fiance) got into a huge fight. it’s not like you were strangers before that, in fact, you both were childhood friends who stuck with each other through thick and thin.
the only problem with that was you were so stupidly in love with him, and you have been ever since you were kids. the second the argument went down, you were the first person he told and one thing led to another.
now of course, you couldn’t blame rintaro for only making the love you had for him ten times stronger once the situationship started, he was in the wrong for initiating the idea, but you were more wrong for going with it knowing that the feelings you had for him would only grow.
and recently, you noticed him acting strange. ignoring your calls, texting back extremely late, and — inviting you to hisengagement party?
you honestly just needed closure. if he wanted what the two of you had to end, then all he had to do was say so. it wasn’t fair that you had to find out he felt that way through an invitation from the mail.
which is why you impulsively walk to the 6′3 man stating, “we need to talk.”
rintaro’s previous smiling face is completely wiped off, visibly paling with each passing second when he sees the complete seriousness in your face.
his fiancé doesn’t notice, too enraptured by a conversation she’s having with one of her friends. you’re so used to receiving such cold treatment from rintaro in public that you don’t even flinch at his reaction. you knew that rintaro only showed his love for you in private.
whatever the case is, rintaro still decides to follow you.
“hey,” he swallows harshly, trying his best to maintain a neutral, “you wanted to talk?”
it gives you whiplash — the suna rintaro you know, the one you fell in love with, the down-to-earth and always calm rintaro is here standing in front of you like he’s a stranger. nothing about his facial expression currently says calm or down-to-earth.
“i just want closure, rintaro. i promise i’m not trying to ruin your relationship or whatever you think i’m plotting right now.”
his brows raise, as if what you’re saying makes no sense whatsoever, “what makes you think that?”
“that look on your face,” you scoff playfully, crossing your arms together “god, you’re looking at me like i’m some crazy ex. it’s just me, remember?”
he stares at you for a few seconds, mouth opening as if he’s about to argue but then closes his mouth with a sigh. at the gesture, you let out a laugh and suna could only do the same.
“so i’m guessing this is over?”
“i’m really sorry,” he says sheepishly, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck.
“don’t be,” grinning, (or rather, forcing one,) you hand him the gift bag you brought before taking a deep breath, “don’t cheat on her anymore, rintaro.”
he takes the bag, nodding his head once again before smiling, “i won’t.”
for months you’ve always wondered what you should’ve done with the loving feelings suna rintaro has given you. but in all honesty, you’re only starting to think that you should’ve thrown that loving feeling away from the start.
SUNA RINTARO finds himself keening into your lap — a clear sign of his appreciation for the softness of your thighs (as if his constant mumbles of praise did not suffice). suna would lace your fingers with his own as he cradles your hand in his chest. feeling close to you was all he could ever ask for. you always loved it whenever he holds your hands against his own cheek, eyes fluttering close at its warmth.
SAKUSA KIYOOMIwould actually be the person whose lap you would lie on not because he did not want to lie down on your lap, but rather because he finds you absolutely beautiful if it was you instead. even better, sakusa loved it when your arms reached out in an attempt to weave your fingers through his curls. when he bends his head to help you, the smile that laced your lips was the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.
AKAASHI KEIJI has always loved the view when you were around, even more so when he was on your lap. resting his head on your thighs, he would softly whisper to you to look at him. when you finally did, butterflies bloomed in his stomach when your fingers pinched his cheeks. in his heart, he hoped that you looked at him as lovingly as he does to you.
MIYA ATSUMU indulges himself. this man does not hold back when it comes to comfort. he would curl his arm under one of your thigh, snuggling it as if it was his pillow. yes, it was uncomfortable for you but as you watched atsumu slowly fall into slumber, you can’t help but leave him in his peaceful state. or maybe you just can’t seem to leave given how his arm tightens around your thigh every time you tried to pry yourself off of him.
IWAIZUMI HAJIME often seek different ways to tell you how much he loves you. from simple ‘i love you’s to keeping a whole gallery full of videos and pictures of the two of you, it was clear that he loves you deeply. yet, he still managed to shock you when he sat between your legs, peppering kisses between your thighs before resting his head against it, looking up at you with such an innocent look on his face.
a/n;happy valentine’s day to both couples and singletons <3 to celebrate the occasion, i thought id return from the dead and write a lil sth sth about a character i barely write for on this blog jk its suna again but writing with him is genuinely so cathartic m'sorry anyways hope you like it <3
“Did you know it’s Valentine’s day today?” You ask out of the blue. You’re both laying in bed, with Suna resting on his back, one arm flung around your waist as you lay peacefully atop his chest. The other he uses to scroll through TikTok, but the sound of fleeting videos stops when you speak up, and you see Suna’s thumb stop moving like he’s frozen in time.
“Seriously?”
“Seriously,” You huff out a laugh as you lift your head from his chest, noting the genuine bewilderment on his face. He’s not usually one to forget things so you understand his reaction. Not that you mind— it would’ve slipped your mind too if it weren’t for the annual Valentine’s Day video Snapchat sent you earlier that day. Unfortunately, you had only opened that message once the day was pretty much over, and only now did you think of bringing it up. “Don’t worry, I only found out today, too.”
“You should have told me sooner,” he says, abandoning his phone on the bedsheets and using his now free hand to brush a few strands of hair from your face. “We could’ve done something.”
His gaze meets yours and you smile. It’s somewhere around eleven o’ clock, and the moon has reached its peak. Its glow pours through the sheer curtains of your shared bedroom and casts a soft blanket of silver across your bed. Coincidentally, it catches Suna’s eyes, revealing all three colours of his irises— slithers of amber and sapphire swimming in pools of the palest jade.
They’re even prettier like this, you think. But your figurative thought bubble bursts when Suna gently taps your nose, reeling you back to reality.
“True, but there’s always next time,” you offer. “But forget again next year and I might think you don’t love me anymore.”
“Forget what?” He feigns. You roll your eyes and he smirks.
“Very funny. But speaking of love— when did you start loving me? I don’t think I’ve asked you this before.”
“Oh no, we are not doing this,” he deadpans. He tries subtly drifting away from the topic by reaching out for his phone, but you’re quick to block it with your hand in hopes of reeling him back in.
“Oh c'mon, it’s Valentine’s Day!” You say, hoping the notion of said holiday would tide him over. “Consider this your gift to me and in exchange I’ll tell you when I started liking you— which FYI, was probably earlier than you’d expect.”
The latter part of your sentence rouses a small reaction from Suna, body reacting similarly to the way a cat’s ear would twitch when they hear something that sparks their interests. He tries playing it off nonetheless and upkeeps his nonchalant behaviour.
“What makes you think I even have an answer to that? I don’t have a date in mind or anything.”
“But you have something in mind, I bet. Plus, you can’t tell me you’re not the least bit interested in what I have to say.”
Suna shifts his gaze to the corner of the ceiling at that, which non-verbally answers your question.
“I mean, if it was for as long as you say…”
Little does he know, youhaveloved him for as long as you say. At the time you hadn’t fully realised it yourself. Your feelings had remained hidden for a good amount of time, burried deep beneath a concrete of denial, fear, and reluctance, until eventually all your inhibitions had been swept away in a crashing tidal wave that was Suna Rintarou. It swept you off your feet, away from shore and engulfed you in the uncharted waters of a newfound romance.
As for when this particular realisation occured, there were a few moments that came to mind, as did a list of reasons that strengthened your infatuation with him.
You’ve loved Suna ever since you associated the notion of comfort to his name, in the tranquil moments spent in each others company, watching the television with your legs tangled beneath a fluffy blanket. Studying for an exam in the library, knees brushing against each other though nobody ever brought it up. Driving home after a long day with the music turned down low, neither of you speaking, neither of you needing to utter a word in order to feel completely at ease.
You’ve loved Suna ever since you realised it’s his voice you seek whenever you’re at your lowest. His voice, slow and steady, calming in ways that seem almost medicinal. You’ve heard it loud and clear on the volleyball court more times than you can remember. You’ve heard it small and lazy when asked to read something aloud to the class back in your highschool days. But most importantly, it was his voice that soothed you any time your life has felt astray, whenever things weren’t working out the way you wanted, in times where you felt exhausted, disappointed, angry, scared or lost. It’s Suna’s voice that would utter out words of encouragement, of praise or advice, even when yours struggled to enounciate the source of your woes.
You’ve loved Suna and the way he smiles at you. It’s mostly smug, mostly reserved to when he’s teasing you. But your favourite has to be when he’s most unguarded, completely at ease when a grin lights up his face, prying his lips open enough to reveal a row of front teeth, neatly aligned between two pointed canines. These times are rare, as is the bright and cheerful laugh that erupts from his chest when he finds something particularly funny. It’s never failed to catch you off guard, fondness swelling in your chest and making it ache, lovingly so.
You’ve loved Suna and the silly game he and his little sister had invented. A game in which he would hold his sisters hands and spin around in one spot like a human beyblade, fast enough so that her feet would lift off the ground, grinning wickedly as he then let go and watched her fumble around on her feet, now totally unable to walk in a straight line.
You’ve loved Suna ever since you found out about that noise he makes after finishing the last of his chuupet on a hot day. That satisfied “ahh” he does before licking his fingers clean.
You’ve loved Suna and the way his gaze occasionally lingers on his lock screen when he thinks nobody’s looking. It’s a picture of you and him; it’s old and a little blurry but it never fails to make Suna smirk whenever he sees your surprised face lit up on his phone screen— flushed pink from the kiss he had planted on your cheek.
You’ve loved Suna and how generous he is when it comes to you. How he’ll always (secretly) buy you that pastry you were eyeing up in the bakery, only to surprise you with it later that day. How he isn’t too proud to return home with a random trinket that reminded him of you, or bringing you back an accessory or clothing item that thought would look nice on you.
You’ve loved Suna and the fact that he remembers. He remembers the small things, such as the name of your favourite song, the places you went on each of your dates. And, he remembers the bigger things. Like that even you have your bad days, that there’re days on which you want to be alone; knows which words you like to hear, need to hear and when you need to hear them. He remembers that like everyone, you have boundaries, and never has he overstepped them or made you feel small about wanting some time to yourself. He remembers to nurture you, to gather you up in his arms when need be, to treat you with utmost respect and love you unconditionally.
You’ve loved Suna when you finally pierced through the cloud of mystery that once shrouded the boy you met in high school. That the Suna you know is nothing like the rumours painted him to be. It was so easy to label him the prickly, quiet guy. The snarky second year who— outside of his small friend group— seemed almost impossible to approach. It’s a shame though, because if only they had given him the chance, they would’ve found that underneath his aloof demeanor lies someone playful, someone who’s a little dorky, who enjoys terrible puns and cheesy pick up lines, and shamelessly cackles at petty internet fights. He’s attentive, always listening to what you have to say, whether you’re rambling about a cute puppy you saw in the street, ranting about the bad hair day you’re having— even if you go on an in-depth discourse about that one character he’s probably heard of countless times before, he listens— without interrupting, forever invested in what stories you have to offer.
He’ll never understand just how much you’ve come to care for him, how much you’ve thrived on discovering these small intricacies that make the man you’ve come to love so deeply. The same man who used to tease you for your blatant crush on him, who’d scoff and poke fun at you whenever he caught you daydreaming. If only he knew the millions of thoughts that crossed through your mind, the whirlwind of emotions that swirled inside your chest each time you laid eyes on him.
“If only you knew,” you murmur dreamily, gazing at him in a way so lovingly it prompts a small, disbelieving chuckle to slip past his lips, eyebrows raised in earnest curiosity.
“Yeah? Don’t be shy, spill.”
This time it’s your turn to giggle and you feel your heart swell at the look on Suna’s face. You can tell there’s anticipation glinting behind his eyes, maybe even a hint of child-like excitement as he awaits your answer.
“I think…” You trail off, drawing out your sentence for dramatic effect. You reach up to brush your fingers across his jaw, keeping a feather-light touch as you run the pads of your fingers along the soft of his cheek, up to the curve of his cheekbone, burning the image of him in your mind. “I started loving you mostly for…”
“My…Irresistible good looks?”
You splutter as Suna flashes you— what is indeed— an irresistibly handsome grin. You crack a smile of your own and shake your head. “That’s a plus— but no.”
In that moment, Suna tilts his head, his expression softening momentarily. You can tell he isn’t in a teasing mood this time. He seems genuinely curious, invested in what you have to say. “Then what?”
“I think I started loving you when I began associating you with home,” you hum, gazing up at him with that same fluttering feeling in your chest as the day you realised: “That being with you felt like home.”
Suna turns speechless then, eyes still focused on you, and you’re surprised to see that his face has begun to flush pink. It starts colouring the high points of his cheeks and spreads to his ears, tinting them the most adorable shade of red. “Are you blushing?” You laugh out loud, asking the obvious. Your teasing doesn’t help Suna’s case, but he tries to maintain a shred of dignity by holding eye contact and responding to your question with a curt “no shit.”
“Why?” You laugh, prodding his cheek with your index. He’s quick to swat your hand away, and this time he does look elsewhere, unable to face your giddy little grin and relentless giggling.
“Jus’ didn’t expect such an honest answer is all..”
You coo at him which makes him click his tongue. There’s no real malice behind his reaction, though. He’s just so used to being the one who teases, so to have the tables turned always makes him react this way, all furrowed brows and clenched jaw. He’s also not used to you being so openly affectionate with him— at least not with your words. To hear you openly confess your feelings to him make his brain fog and heart stutter— like he’s once again reminded why you’re here, why he’s lucky enough to hear you say those words in the first place.
“Still with me?” You tease as you poke his chin to get his attention. He looks at you then, traces of rose still apparent on his pale features though it’s clear he’s trying to remain collected.
“Hush, you.” He rolls his eyes at your cheeky smile and decidedly pulls you closer to him. You find yourself caged in his arms, head slotted in the space between his chin and shoulder but you don’t protest. Instead, you wriggle closer to him, basking in his warmth, melting in his embrace. The feeling of him is so familiar. His voice, the way his heartbeat beats softly against the palm of your hand. Even his scent, that faint whiff of peppermint and his off-brand body wash feels like a comforting memory, like something that’s been here your whole life.
Feels like home.
“And you?” You inquire softly. For a moment you wonder if you had spoken loud enough because Suna doesn’t reply.
Until he eventually does.
“Same reason. Ever since I felt like I didn’t need to hide myself anymore. Guess you could call yourself my safe place.”
“Icould call myself your safe place?” You nag, hinting at the odd wording Suna was all too aware of. He can hear the smile in your voice, and luckily for him you’re unable to detect the new wave of heat that blooms across his face.
“You know what I mean.”
You laugh, then crane your neck so you can softly peck the underside of his jaw. “I know. Just wanted to hear you say it.”
“Maybe next year,” he says, patting your head. You scoff and lightly jab him in the gut.
“Late happy Valentine’s Day,” he chuckles, and you find yourself smiling despite yourself.
a/n; a quick something i whipped up on christmas night, i hope everyone had a wonderful day <3
“Sunarin, where on earth are you taking us?”
“Patience. We’re almost there.”
“You said that thirty minutes ago.”
“Details, (y/n). Details.” Suna tosses a smirk over his shoulder and tugs you closer to his side as you huff at him, acknowledging the impatience on your face.
This wasn’t what you were expecting when he showed up at your door at ten in the evening. All he’d told you was that you needed to wrap up warm, and from there, the two of you had made your way to the city center, walking along the brightly lit streets towards a completely unknown location. It’s a Friday night— the night of Christmas Eve— so you’d thought that he wanted to take you out to see the Christmas market or perhaps gaze at the stunningly decorated Christmas tree that stood proudly in the center of town.
Alas, you had long walked past all the traditional Christmasy spots and are now wandering further and further away from town, around the outskirts of town where fewer people tread at this time of night.
a/n; a quick something i whipped up on christmas night, i hope everyone had a wonderful day <3
“Sunarin, where on earth are you taking us?”
“Patience. We’re almost there.”
“You said that thirty minutes ago.”
“Details, (y/n). Details.” Suna tosses a smirk over his shoulder and tugs you closer to his side as you huff at him, acknowledging the impatience on your face.
This wasn’t what you were expecting when he showed up at your door at ten in the evening. All he’d told you was that you needed to wrap up warm, and from there, the two of you had made your way to the city center, walking along the brightly lit streets towards a completely unknown location. It’s a Friday night— the night of Christmas Eve— so you’d thought that he wanted to take you out to see the Christmas market or perhaps gaze at the stunningly decorated Christmas tree that stood proudly in the center of town.
Alas, you had long walked past all the traditional Christmasy spots and are now wandering further and further away from town, around the outskirts of town where fewer people tread at this time of night.
You press closer to Suna.
“Cold?”
“More like creeped out,” you shudder, apprehensively looking around the empty streets. “How did you even find out about this place?”
Suna shrugs at your question before hooking an arm around your waist. The proximity feels reassuring, the warmth radiating off his body helping to quell part of your fears. “I wander a lot,” he says simply. “City’s pretty at night.”
“You’re like a cat,” you muse, prompting Suna to huff out a curt laugh.
Still, you can’t help but find that his words ring true. Because even though the streets are mostly desolate, you can’t deny that beneath the initial eeriness of the outskirts lies an understated beauty that becomes more apparent the further you walk.
You enjoy how the empty streets rest in silence, save for the sound of yours and Suna’s steady footsteps against the damp pavement. The obsidian sky looks particularly picturesque aswell, especially the more you distance yourself from the central parts of town, giving way to stars that peak out behind misty clouds like timid fireflies. Even the water in the potholes catch your eye, remnants of yesterday’s snowfall shimmering under the streetlamps’ amber hue.
You’d marvel at the scenery for longer if it weren’t for the pressing question of where you were headed. You’re certain you’ve been walking for close to an hour now, and the lack of shops, bars, restaurants and overall social buzz make you question what else there possibly is to see.
“You sure you know where you’re going, mister alley cat? Seems very deserted here…”
Suna glances at you before making a sharp right, leading you down yet another street you’ve never set foot on. He really does live up to his nickname. Navigating the city with confident steps, slinking through streets and alleys like he’s done this countless times before.
“That’s the point,” he says. “Don’t you worry, it’ll be worth it. Plus we’re almost there.”
You squint at him.
“For real, this time.”
His footsteps slow as he reaches a tall building, pushing the door open and stopping at the base of a staircase. You give him a skeptical look, not exactly liking the look of the run-down, and from the looks of it abandoned building. Suna’s quick to pick up on your apprehension and laces his hand with yours, giving it a firm squeeze.
Trust me, the gesture says.
With a gentle tug, he induces you up the stairs, occasionally glancing over his shoulder to assure you’re okay. The iron stairs creak under your feet as you make your way up. A mix of nerves and excitement bubble in your chest. The climb takes a while, but eventually Suna comes to a halt once you reach the top of the staircase, behind another iron door which you can only imagine leads to the roof of the building. “Alright,” he starts, eyes glinting playfully. “Close your eyes.”
You raise an eyebrow in question, then do as he says. All of a sudden it’s as though your senses have been heightened. The ground is solid under your feet as Suna pushes the door open and pulls you outside. There’s a faint scent of rain in the air, the breeze is crisper and Suna’s hands are warm against your own, his hold delicate as he guides you onwards with a slow pace.
You stop after just a few steps, almost bumping into Suna from the abrupt pause. He chuckles and softly pecks your forehead.
“We’re here,” he murmurs, his voice light. “You can open your eyes.”
“Okay,” you say tentatively. You feel almost giddy at what you’re about to lay eyes on. You’re positive it involves the view, given your current location, but that doesn’t stop you from drawing in a breath the moment you lift your eyelids.
Below you is a constellation of lights, every flashing shop sign, every passing car reminiscent of stars glimmering against a velvety black sky. The cityscape looks like a nebula made up of the warmest yellows infused with the coolest shades of blue. Never have you seen the city look so mesmerising.
“Wow,” you breath, enamoured by the abondance of colours. It’s crazy to think that each light you see down there is another person living their own life, with their own personality, own job, own routine…
And on top of an abandoned building stand two more people, watching everything unravel, completely unbeknownst to the world.
“Like it?” Asks Suna, reeling you from your daze. You glance at him. His body is turned towards the city, pale green irises reflecting the sea of lights below, unguarded and seemingly just as fascinated by the thousands of stars beneath you. You’re tempted to reach out at him, to trace the contours of his moonlit face, to feel the softness of his chestnut hair which appears almost silver beneath the moon’s glow.
Your breath hitches once again when he turns to look at you, snatching the remaining breath from your throat.
“Alley cat got your tongue?”
You shake your head as he cocks an eyebrow at you, amusement playing on his features. Judging by the look on his face, it’s safe to assume he’d noticed you staring, thus you don’t even try to play it off. That kind of act never works around Suna anyway.
“It’s beautiful,” you say, ignoring how Suna smirks at your statement. You’re forced to add: “the view, I mean.”
“Told you,” he replies, sounding almost proud. “It’s the second nicest view in Japan.” He adds.
“Oh?” Curious, you tilt your head at Suna. “What’s the first?”
For a moment you’re left unanswered, silence hanging in the air as you maintain eye contact with the man before you. He doesn’t say a word, which confuses you slightly. He simply regards you, eyes just a tad more tender than usual.
That’s when it hits you.
Heat rises to your cheeks, and just when you hoped the darkness would be enough to conceal your blush, Suna lets out a roguish laugh. “Took you long enough.”
“That was so cheesy,” You chide, your voice on the verge of laughter despite your initial embarassement. Another chuckle rumbles in Suna’s chest as he soaks in your flustered appearance. Then, as the rosiness of your cheeks begins to die down, Suna speaks up again.
“Mind if I get cheesier?” He asks.
The oddness of his question leaves you skeptical, but before you can ask what he means, Suna steps forward and surprises you by resting a hand across your cheek. Immediately, you feel your heart rate pick up, and like second nature you feel your eyes begin to drift shut, already craving more of his touch. Your silence is all he needs to hear in order to inch closer to your face, hooking a finger beneath your chin.
“Merry Christmas, (y/n).”
He presses his lips to yours, and around you, the world spins.
“Can you hold this for me?” you ask, blindly moving your coffee toward Suna as you walk beside him, your other hand rifling through your purse.
He takes it without question, watching you from his peripheral, wondering what you could possibly be looking for. And Suna’s quiet beside you, content to be so. After all, he enjoys these moments, even if he doesn’t say.
With your head down now, Suna turns his own to face you. He presses a palm lightly to your back, a silent request to move toward him before your shoe catches on the large split in the sidewalk. The touch is brief; present and gone much too soon for you to take notice.
And Suna’s familiar with this unconscious habit of yours: placing your attention elsewhere, relying on him to ensure nothing happens. He takes…pride in it, in knowing that of all the things that have changed since you first met in middle school, this hasn’t been one of them.
However, he lifts your coffee to his lips, curious as to why it’s this drink in particular you always order. Suna tastes it, brows lifting in mild surprise—it’s good. He takes another drink, and another, before the coffee is snatched curtly from his hand.
You’re staring up at him. “I said hold it, Rin, not drink it.” You can see the beginnings of a smile on his mouth.
“Technically, I was the who bought it,” he says.
You pass him a few bills, pushing it against his chest as you turn a corner. “Not anymore.”
Suna breathes out a laugh through his nose, taking the money; you always did insist on paying him back, even if he could afford a price ten-fold of it.
Something falters in his expression then, a change you don’t see, when you drink from the same cup.
If he was a younger, he would’ve jested that it was an 'indirect kiss.’ But Suna’s older now, as are you, and he doesn’t mention it. Even if there’s a sudden, prodding warmth to his cheeks. He doesn’t understand.
Suna takes you back to your apartment building, listening as you tell him about your day until you reach the building’s front steps.
“Text me when you get home, okay?” you tell him, tugging at his jacket once, a wordless 'goodbye’cultivated when you were children, when Suna hadn’t been comfortable with hugs. The gesture had remained, even now.
He smiles, pulls at the fabric of your shirt near your waist in a similar manner that you had. “Of course.”
Before you move away from him completely, and with your back to him, Suna discreetly returns your money to your purse.
