#taiyang x raven
Jaune:*Glares at Yang and Blake giggling and feeding each other finger foods*
*Jaune runs up, flips the table over scattering food and making the two girls jump before running away - escaping through their 23rd floor window*
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Ruby:Mmmmm.*Is kissed*
Oscar:*Pulls back from kiss, smiling gently*
Jaune:*Irritated*
Oscar:*Steps back* How about we take Jaune home, baby?
Jaune:*RKO outta nowhere’s Oscar*
Ruby:*Shrieks*What the heck, Jaune!?
Jaune:*Is too busy being a viper, hissing and staring at the unconscious Oscar’s body*
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Glynda:*Laughs cheerfully into scroll* Oh Bart–
*Jaune angrily runs up and slaps her scroll to the ground, stomps it into pieces, glares at her and then proceeds to sprint out of the rebuilding Vale*
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Nora:HA! You’re no match for Renny and me’s sick combos, fearless leader! *Button mashes as Ren smiles next to her*
Ren:*Rubs Nora’s back*
Jaune:*Triggered af, proceeds to fall back on years of video gaming and utterly destroys them both*
Nora:Awww. We’re dead, Renny.
Ren:I wouldn’t have it any other way than together, Nora. *Nora tears up*
*Glass shatters as Jaune chucks the console out the window and dives out of it like a professional swimmer*
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Weiss:*Excitedly*And then he actually proposed! Right there, with the sunset and the waves crashing on the beach and *tears up a bit* it was just so romantic of him.
Sun:Gotta give it to my boy, conquering the ocean for his girl is pretty cool.
Neptune:*Blushes*
*Jaune has had enough of the engagement party, flings glass of wine at Weiss whose mouth drops open as she drips with it and steals Sun’s glass from a stunned hand, does the same to Neptune*
Jaune: Good day! *Storms off*
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Raven:*Uncomfortable, embarrassed* You actually mean that, don’t you?
Tai:*Very serious* Do you think I’d joke about something like this, Rae?
*Raven looks sad, but hopeful. Jaune, who was busy digging up a tree for Tai felt his blood boil and chucked a huge amount of dirt at the two of them*
Tai:*Yells and falls into his house*
Raven:*Spitting, yanking at the chest of her top before freezing* MY HAIR!!!
*Jaune runs*
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Qrow:*Clapping Winter’s cheeks*
Winter:*Getting clapped and loving it*
Jaune:*Enters room, freezes*
Also Jaune: *Aims scroll at the two and takes a picture*
Qrow:What the fuck!? *Trying to hide his dick*
Winter:*Lets out a little scream and tries to pull pants up* N-no, please, delete it - aaahhhh, he’s leaving! *Sprints after him*
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Maria: Ahh, I’ve been waiting all day for this.
*Happily eating pistachio ice cream cone*
Jaune:*Angrily smacks her cone to the sidewalk, splattering and shattering it* Get the fuck outta here with that bullshit!
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Jaune:*Walking into his apartment after several annoying days angrily* –with that shit, I ain’t even gonna play with that shit! If I can’t be happy, in love or getting laid then nobody can!
Jaune:
Jaune:*Looks at Neo stretched across his couch, laying there and sleeping peacefully beneath a big, comfy pink blanket with her hair mussed from sleep and looking adorable*
Jaune:*Realizes*Oh shit! I forgot I amhappy, in love and am getting laid on a regular basis! *Slaps himself in the face* Fuck. Equality for all. Forgive me, adorable love of my life, but Mama Arc didn’t raise no bitch!
*Runs at Neo, who wakes up bleary eyed and to the sight of Jaune doing a front flip towards her tiny, sleepy frame*
—————–
Jaune:And that’s how I wound up in the hospital. I senton’d my girlfriend, Neo roundhouse kicked me in the head and then put me through the kitchen table and I’m very sorry.
Neo:*Nods grumpily*
Everyone Jaune Fucked With:Good.*Walks off because they’re still pissed*
Jaune:*Sighs* I’m going to be kissing so much ass and not all of it’s gonna be yours, Neo.
Neo:*Pokes him in a broken rib*
Jaune: Ow! I deserved that. Oh. I deserve it. *Winces*Ohhhh. I’m on the couch, aren’t I?
Neo:*Holds a finger up*
Jaune:Awww man, a month? *Neo gives him an ‘are you serious right now?’ face* Yeah alright. Stupid brain, always getting me in trouble.
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Hey, look who wrote Snowbird into one of these despite not liking Snowbird at all.
