Rest Easy - Anakin Skywalker

Anakin is all too familiar with restless sleep. So, when he sees just how tired you are, he offers to help.

“There’s that look again.”

There was a moment’s hesitation before you flicked your eyes up from the data display. Statistics and statement pieces still swirled about your vision, even as you met Anakin’s gaze. His brow was furrowed, in the way it always seemed to be since the Clone War began. Only, in that moment, as he looked at you, there was a softness in his eyes that threw your thoughts far from the image of him in battle. Such a gentleness had no place among the blaster fire and metallic corpses of droids.

“Sorry, what?”

“That look,” Anakin echoed, raising a hand to gesture to your face. “You’re either displeased or thinking too hard.”

A stunted, sour laugh slipped past your lips. “Or both.”

“What’s wrong?” Anakin asked, leaning over across the table, hand outstretched for you to take. Slowly, you moved to meet him in the middle to intertwine your fingers with his. Warm, the skin of his palm kissed yours in the mildest way, melted the ache behind your eyes, and relieved some of the heaviness of your limbs.

“Reviewing old legislation is neither entertaining nor easy on the mind,” you gave Anakin’s hand a squeeze. “That’s all, though. Nothing I can’t work through.”

“It has nothing to do with how you were tossing around last night?”

You quirked a brow at him in question and Anakin leaned back, his hand slipping from yours. A frown quivered along your lips at the loss of contact, but the loss was brief. Anakin stood from his seat across the sleek, metal table and started towards you. The dark folds of his tunics shifted with every step that brought him closer to you. When he was within arms reach, he pressed his hip against the table’s edge and leaned down towards you.

“You didn’t sleep, so I didn’t sleep,” he murmured. “Tell me what’s wrong, Y/N.”

As he spoke, his eyes held contact with yours, unyielding, reading your every microexpression. You knew the second you swallowed too hard that Anakin saw your resolve break. Memories of kicking your legs under the soft sheets of your bed, tossing from side to side, flooded back to you. Anakin must have seen those same memories too because he nodded, all too knowingly.

“Tell me, let me help you.”

There was never any hiding from him.

“Unless you can lift the weight of thousands displaced by the war and convince the Senate to provide for them, then there’s not much helping me,” you explained. “Padme’s proposal is necessary but the precedents for it…they’re nonexistent. At least according to everything I’ve read.”

The thought of all the reading you had done nearly made your throat close up. Endless pages of Basic, detailing every piece of humanitarian legislation passed by the Senate had absorbed you, mind and body, for the past few planetary cycles. Yet, despite all that time, your research had come up empty. There were no prior models that you and the rest of Padme’s team could use to base her new, improved plan off of.

“So, you have to start from nothing?” Anakin asked, putting voice to your whirling thoughts.

Bitterly, you nodded and let your eyes fall from his. “Yes, and when you phrase it in that way, it sounds even more dire.”

“Sorry, you know,” Anakin’s fingers hooked under your chin and lifted your gaze back to him, “it’s not a doomed idea. You make things real.”

“But not without a precedent,” you countered, “this is something new.”

“We’re in a new galaxy, a new Republic,” Anakin pressed. “Now is the best time to push progress forward.”

You couldn’t help the smile at his persistence. “Careful, you’re beginning to sound like a senator’s speech. Padme may enlist you.”

“I’m enlisted in a different war,” he replied, his hand moving along your jaw to cup your cup. “One with fewer speeches.”

You frowned at his words before you pressed a kiss to the meat of his palm. In response, the corners of his mouth quirked upwards ever-so-slightly, but not for long. When his lips fell down again, Anakin stepped closer, letting you feel the warmth of his body more fully. He leaned in closer too, waves of light brown hair falling to frame his face.

“Tell me what I can do.”

“I did,” you sighed, eyes flicking from his to his lips. “Save the people.”

“I’m trying, with every battle, but what can I do for you, right now? How can I get you to rest easy?”

A grin broke out along your features the second the thought entered your head. Anakin seemed to sense it, part of you wondered if it was the Force. Perhaps he used it to help read you, read your mind even. But no, that wasn’t it. It was just Anakin, the bond you shared that gifted you both with a sort of secret language. Either way, he knew what you were going to say before you opened your mouth.

That didn’t stop you from saying it anyway: “I know one way you could help.”

A rumble of a chuckle raced up his throat, a sound that you quickly swallowed when you leaned forward to close the little gap between you. Your lips found his as if you were never parted, to begin with, like being close was your natural state and separated being a foreign condition. Using his hand and, this time you were sure of it, the Force, Anakin pulled you up from your seat until you were standing. As he did, his other hand came up to the other side of your face so that he could hold you impossibly close.

“Would you believe me,” Anakin managed to whisper when you parted for air, “if I told you this wasn’t my initial intention?”

His teasing tone, like the warmth of his hand in yours had only a minute before, lifted your tired spirits. Any hint of exhaustion alleviated, if only for a precious few seconds. A laugh, one truer and lighter than the first, slipped past your lips. Anakin laugh again too and renewed every nerve ending fried by work. You leaned in again, for another kiss. His lips move fluidly against yours, soft and warm.

Then, when you pulled away, you replied, “no, but I’m alright with that.”

anakin skywalker, the type of father to buy himself a “galaxy’s best dad” mug and shirt just because why not

Chapter V

Many weeks had passed after the eventful night in your quarters. 

After that evening, it was as though your stares at each other had become more heated and the urge to touch him seemed more overwhelming. Training had become more bearable as you so the growing respect Anakin began to have towards you. Pride swelling in your chest as your heart beat faster. 

Instead of casually leaning against a pillar, Anakin would actively train beside you. If you needed any help, he would place his hands on your body, strategically moving your limbs around to succumb to the correct stance. He would mutter instructions in your ears, in a type of way that would leave your whole body peppered in goosebumps.  

But, that was all it was- lingering looks and dreamy endeavors. You sighed as you sunk into your chair, the lull of Anakin’s Corellian G9 Rigger-class light freighter engines groaning as the spacecraft zoomed through hyperspace. Anakin glanced at you from his peripheral vision, his lips tucking upwards into a sly smirk. You raised a brow. 

“Is my flying boring you?” He quipped as a pool of similar stars surrounded them; signifying how much closer they were to their destination.

“No, but sitting around doing nothing is,” you retorted, fingers lazily twirling at the ends of your hair. Anakin craned his neck as he turned to face you- dark, sea-blue eyes staring humorously at you. 

“Ah, interesting. Even though last night you begged me to let you retire from training sooner so you can ‘relax’ before our mission. I see,” he laughed, silently accepting your playful scowl as an appropriate response. 

Even though you seemed to be on good terms; earlier you had gotten into a fight. You pleaded for Anakin to let you fly them to Alderaan as word had revealed that Count Dooku was preparing for something terrible to happen. You were to travel with your master, capture Dooku and bring him before the Jedi Council. Tension was bubbling back in Coruscant as secessionist propaganda began stirring around the levels. Star systems had begun seceding from the Galactic Republic, pledging their allegiance to the Confederacy of Independent Systems. This had begun burdening the Jedi Council greatly. As the Confederacy of Independent Systems grew slowly; time rapidly became highly valuable as no one knew when the next planned attack would befall. Hence, arresting Count Dooku was a current, number one priority. 

In any case, Anakin had irritated you even more as he stubbornly denied you the pleasure of flying the ship. But you quietened down, knowing from first-person experience how much General Skywalker loved his time controlling the spacecraft. If you were being completely honest with yourself- it was kind of cute. 

“Let’s just get this over with,” you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose as Anakin flipped a couple of switches on, soundly telling you to help him begin the landing process. You complied to your master’s wishes, leaning forward to tap the buttons laying in front of you on the elongated, sleek dashboard of his ship. 

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The opening groaned as it declined downwards, creating the path connecting between the metal spacecraft and the green lands of Alderaan. Following Anakin’s suit, you stepped onto the grass; the blanket of gravel crunching under the pressure of your boots. He had landed on a tiny opening surrounded by a forest of intimidating trees- an attempt to conceal the huge, silver Freighter craft. You parted ways slightly as you decided to explore the environment surrounding you; only to run back to him when he whistled at you. 

“Look,” he pointed to the ground, the clear sight of fresh footsteps scarring the earth before your eyes. You bit your lip. 

“Seems like he isn’t travelling alone.” 

“I wouldn’t be surprised if he had his own droid army. Dooku is intelligent; he knows we’re coming for him. Our advantage is that we now know where to find him,” Anakin muttered bitterly, running a hand through his hair before reaching to touch your shoulder. 

“Let’s just follow the trail and see where it leads us.” 

You raised a brow in question. “If he indeed has an army protecting him, don’t you think we’d need some back up?” 

Anakin sent you a cocky smirk; already taking the lead as he continued onward. 

“Please. It’s nothing we can’t take.” 

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“I’m…waiting…for…an…apology,” you yelled out, lightsaber sizzling at the contact it continuously made with the shots sent your way. 

“Fine,” Anakin bellowed back as his own weapon single-handedly slashed through three different droids before deflecting his own fair share of shots. “I apologize…we should’ve…called for…backup,” he pushed out through gritted teeth, lightsaber decapitating any droid standing in his way as he advanced towards Dooku, who eagerly watched the young Jedi General and his Padawan demolish his supposed ‘protectors’. 

You weren’t necessarily angry at the turn of events. You just knew that if Anakin had listened to you earlier and called for backup- getting to Count Dooku would’ve been a much easier job. Unfortunately, it seemed as though your overly-confident master possessed too much faith in the both of you. But, that made you fight harder as a feeling of warmth spread through your body; the butterflies in your stomach fighting a battle of their own. 

When you noticed Dooku pulling out his own lightsaber; you realized how close Anakin was to him. Instead of hurrying towards him, you continued engaging in combat with the droids, your dominant hand doing all the work with your lightsaber as your other hand reached out to pull out your Holopad; fumbling to contact Master Obi-Wan as your eyes stayed trained on the enemy before you. 

“Hello, Padawan Y/N, have you encountered a problem?” Obi-Wan’s voice echoed through the device, the blue flicker of his silhouette glitching and oscillating as you held onto it tightly. 

“Well, Master, yes and no,” you grunted out as you firmly gripped onto your weapon, another shot  bouncing off the blazing blade and through the chest of the attacker droid. Not only were you currently focusing on the group of droids charging at you, but you could also hear Anakin growling as he engaged in a one-on-one fight with Count Dooku. 

“Good news is that we found Dooku…Anakin is currently preoccupied with him..bad news is that we jumped into action… too quickly…we probably need some backup.” 

You heard Obi-Wan click his tongue before sighing. “Ah Anakin, stubborn as always. I’ll be there soon.” His profile disperses and he ends the line of communication. 

You give out a great yell in frustration as the number of droids continue growing. Lucky for you, they were the slow ones- that needed so much as a push to knock them out. Seeing as the Force was eternally with you, you used it to literally shoved a line of them backwards, smirking widely when you heard them clash into their incoming subordinates.

After what seemed like eternity, Obi-Wan and a few other spacecrafts landed near the abandoned, droid-occupied mansion you were currently fighting for your life in. When the responsibility of struggling against an entire fleet of droids had finally been lifted off of your chest, you sprinted towards your master and Dooku. 

You watched as flashes of azure blue clashed with the crimson blood-red color of Dooku’s lightsaber. You wanted to jump in. 

“No, Y/N, let mefinish this piece of space filth,” Anakin barked out at you. For a split second, his eyes met yours, a dangerous fire burning in his pupils. 

“Master, you needn’t have to kill him. Let the Council deal with him,” you called back, cunningly twirling the saber in your hand as you got into a threatening stance- ready to pounce and intervene at any second. 

“Yes,Anakin, do listen to that beautifulPadawan of yours. If something were to happen to you- don’t worry- I’ll take goodcare of her,” Dooku drawled out, his voice sickly venomous as Anakin’s expression contorted into one displaying pure, lucid rage. In the blink of an eye, Anakin twisted his saber, slicing through something that had resulted Dooku in expelling a piercing screech of pain. 

He fell to the ground, hand clutching at his other hand; as part of his limb fell beside him. Blood pooled around the Sith; soaking into his cloak as he stayed on his knees, head dropped. 

“That’s for what happened during our last encounter and for the fact that you can’t watch your tongue,” Anakin declared poisonously as he strode towards the fallen man; roughly picking him up and dragging him towards your spacecraft. You walked behind them, stopping shortly to talk to Obi-Wan as his clone-troopers fought off the last of the droids. 

“Congratulations on your successful mission, Y/N. Anakin has taught you well. Go back to Coruscant with him, deliver Dooku to the Council and I’m sure that you should be expecting good news soon regarding your elevation into Knighthood,” Obi-Wan pointedly stated, a smile of contentedness and pride plastered onto his face. You respectfully bowed before hurrying back to your spacecraft. 

“Thank you, Master Obi-Wan. I’ll see you soon.” 

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After making sure Dooku doesn’t bleed out on your way back to Coruscant; you slumped back down next to Anakin; lazily stretching your arms outwards. 

The Freighter spacecraft was currently floating through space, the constellations rapidly changing every single second. 

Anakin had been unusually quiet.

“Anakin, are you okay?” You whispered as you examined his strained expression. He gave you a quick glance before looking away. 

“Yes, I’m fine. Are you okay?” 

“I am. I hope you’re not mad that I sent Obi-Wan our coordinates.” 

He absentmindedly shook his head, his pale face causing you to bubble up with worry. 

That’s when you noticed the deep gash drawn up from his chest, all the way to the end of his shoulder. You gasped. 

“You’re hurt! Why didn’t you say-” 

“I’m fine,” Anakin replied firmly and if these were circumstances in which neither of you were hurt- you would have closed your mouth and not pressed on. But, he was wounded and you couldn’t just sit there and thrive in ignorance. 

“No, you’re not. Let me help you,” you stoically retorted back, standing abruptly before heading to retrieve the ship’s medical kit. Anakin’s loud, disinterested sigh filled in the silence between you. 

Trembling hands clutched onto the equipment as you realized that now you had to get to his skin. Anakin finally turned to arch a brow at you; knowingly waiting for you to tell him what to do next. 

“Can you…can you please take off your robe and tunic?” You mumbled out, cheeks turning a deep shade of pink. A satisfied Anakin smirked before wincing as he tried to untangle himself out of his clothing. 

“Since you’re asking nicely…although I think I need help with that too,” he offered in a low, raspy voice as you uneasily looked down at him. 

Seeing as there was no other way to move forward without peeling his clothes off of him; you sucked in a deep breath before moving to stand in between his legs. Your slim fingers gently unclasped the hook of his robe; letting it flow over the side of his seat. Carefully pulling at the fabric of his black tunic, you freed it from the grasps of the dried blood before tucking it over his head and onto your seat. Your eyes widened at the solidness of his chest. The way his muscles flexed at every breath he took. You admired him for a second longer; before your eyes fell onto the deep cut that seemed to be Dooku’s doing. 

Anakin shivered as the cold air in their spaceship stroked his bare flesh; but also because he noticed your staring. Swallowing hard, his fought the urge to bite down on his lip and do something the Council had classed as forbidden for any Jedi. He watched you through hooded eyes as you rubbed bacta solution on his wound, wincing here and there if the pain increased. Deep down, he thanked Dooku for doing him this favor. 

You avoided Anakin’s heated stare that drilled through your skull. But that completely juxtaposed your next action as you absentmindedly lowered yourself onto his lap, making it easier for you to work on his wound. He bit back the groan that threatened to escape through his lips. Both of your force signatures had darkened, filled with signs of forbidden want. 

He propped his knees in an effort to make it more comfortable for you, which caused you to look into his darkened pupils and raise a brow. 

“I can sense you, you know?” He growled out, his uninjured, metallic hand finding comfort at the curve of your waist as he gave you a squeeze. You jumped at his touch, your chest rising and falling at a quick pace- similar to Anakin’s. 

“I can sense you too,” you countered as Anakin’s gaze flickered to your lips. 

“I’m not sure when in the galaxy this happened; but the sight of you fighting off all those droids today was incredibly appealing,” he purred out, head cocking to the side as you brushed your fingers through his hair. You leaned in, lips brushing against his ear. 

“I guess you should thank my master for teaching me how to fight like that.” 

Without a warning, Anakin’s hand grabbed at your throat as he pulled you in- crashing his lips into yours. You moaned into his mouth, immediately retaliating as your arms snaked around his neck, pulling him closer. He bit your bottom lip, making you sigh out a moan- and he utilized that to his advantage as he slipped his tongue into your mouth. The kiss was everything you had imagined it to be. 

Butterflies burned your insides, your heart was racing at a speed that was twice faster than the Freighter you were on and the sweet taste of his full lips against yours made you fully straddle him. 

Anakin groaned as his fingers found refuge between the locks of your hair. He aggressively pulled your head to the side, planting sloppy, wet kisses on the corner of your lips before moving down the side of your jaw and onto your throat. You craned your neck to give him easier access, your own fingers rushing to latch onto his long, brown curls. 

When he finally pulled away, you were both breathing heavily, the ecstasy of desire clouding your heads. Anakin looked smugly at you, feeling proud that you looked so disheveled all because of him. Your pouted lips were a prime, swollen red color. Your eyes were hooded with a longing appetite that he had previously only gotten to see as a rare glance sent his way. 

“Anakin,” you whispered softly as you brushed his bangs out of his face. He pressed a finger against your lips, gently silencing you. 

“Don’t, Y/N. I’ve been waiting for a while to do something like this. Your force signature- no matter how much you tried to conceal it from me- it made me go insane as I sensed this carnal urge coming from you too.”

“But…this is wrong. The Council-” 

“Yeah, this sort of thing is forbidden. But, above all, we are human. We are unable to suppress such feelings. It’s in our nature. If there’s a code that forbids attachments; then we can simply ignore it and decide what to do by ourselves. Y/N, no one must know,” Anakin explained in a soft, low voice- his fingers mindlessly playing with a lock of your hair. You pursed your lips, afraid that if you drown in the pleasures of living an enigmatic fantasy with Anakin; you will both get into trouble. 

But then again, as Anakin used to always say during training- “Codes are created so they can ignored and broken.” 

You rested your palms at the side of his face, kissing him sweetly, as opposed to the intense and passionate first kiss you had shared a moment ago. 

“I trust you with my life, Anakin. I can’t keep trying to hide my force signature from you. If this is what our destiny has stored for us, then who am I to try and deny us of that path?” 

He flashed you a wide smile, pulling you in for a kiss that had completely wiped out the entire galaxy from your mind. 

It was just you and him. 

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A/N 

Thanks for all the love and support you’re all sending me via reading my story :) 

I’m not sure if I’m entirely happy with this chapter, but I just wanna let you know that just because they kissed once doesn’t mean that now I’m gonna make their love story easier ;) 

Till next time, 

EnVy

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Taglist:

@shads121@musictelevision@anakinswhore 

Chapter IV

“Y/N…” 

Much to your reluctance, you opened your eyes, hissing soundly as the brightness of the light above you burned your irises. 

After recollecting yourself, you tried once more, this time slower. The medication had slurred reality with your mind, the effect taking its sweet time to ware off. 

“Anakin?” You mumbled out, your voice sounding off in the far distance. You heard someone awkwardly clear their throat out before they stepped closer to your cot. 

“I’m afraid Anakin is not present, Padawan L/N. How are you feeling?” Obi-Wan’s voice fluttered around you, each syllable slowly pronounced clearer and clearer. You groaned, head pounding ferociously. If whatever pierced through you didn’t manage to kill you; this headache seemed to have wanted to do exactly that.

“I’m…fine. What happened?”

Master Obi-Wan pursed his lips tightly, the crease between his brows deepening as you sensed his mind distantly recalling the disasters that made up the eve of the Chancellor’s celebratory event. 

“Well, you saved the Chancellor’s life. Unbeknownst to how the attacker stayed unnoticed between Anakin and I; your quick reflexes and selfless persona caught sight of him and you swung yourself before the Chancellor, taking the shot.” 

You glanced down at the plaster-white bandage twisted around your waist. You ran your fingers along the material, trying to feel where the wound was, but Obi-Wan gently moved your hand away. 

“Let it heal. The plasma energy shot at you missed your stomach by a few mere inches. It’s a deep wound, but lucky for us all, no significant organ was damaged. You’ve been in and out of sleep trances for the past few days, thanks to the medication. But, that is only because when it happened, the shot sent you into shock and we needed to stabilize you as quickly as possible,” Obi-Wan explained, smiling sadly down at your exhausted facade. 

You nodded, running a hand through your hair. “I understand. Thank you for explaining. May I ask where my Master is?” You tried controlling your tone, but the mention of Anakin sent a jolt of electricity through to your heart. Obi-Wan looked away, concealing his hands between the sleeves of his robe. 

“I’m afraid, he left Coruscant. Once this all happened, Anakin decided to take on a mission; leaving without even telling me. Do not take offence, dear Y/N. Anakin probably did it in an attempt to deal with the traumas of that night. After all, losing a Padawan would hurt just as much as it does losing a Master,” he offered apologetically as your face strained into a hurt scowl. “Please, get some rest,” Obi-Wan continued, reaching out to squeeze your shoulder before departing the Jedi Temple’s medical bay. 

You sighed loudly, feeling deeply disappointed that Anakin had left so abruptly. Did he not care about you enough to wait a day or two until you woke up? Did he despise you that much? 

Questions rolled in and out of your mind as you glared up at the ceiling; the medical machinery around you beeping loudly. You were so deep in your hurt thoughts; you barely even noticed the medical droid that popped into your room to check your vitals and change your bandages. 

Another two days passed and your only hobby seemed to be staring into the void of your room’s ceiling. Sometimes, Obi-Wan would come by- try to make you laugh or just keep you company- the fear of losing you to insanity all too real for him. 

You denied the food they were giving you- claiming that exhaustion was taking the best out of you. But really, it was the unforgiving sadness and disappointment caused by the fact that your Master wasn’t present beside you during these new, hard times. You spitefully began missing his irritating jokes and how insulted he would get if you said anything about his job as a general and Jedi. 

But alas, time passed by and you were finally allowed to check out of the medical bay and return to continue your healing in your quarters. 

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Walking through the Temple seemed a mission on its own, as people stared and spoke in hushed voices as you passed by. Nonetheless, you kept your head high as you wordlessly made your way back to your quarters. But, your pacing slowed as you felt the Force ripple around you, sensing someone you were all too familiar with. 

Anakin. 

You followed the Force, palms sweating as your mind raced with thoughts that mixed with the various emotions flowing through your blood vessels. 

However, when you saw him engaging in a deep conversation with Senator Padmé Amidala; all these confusing emotions seemed to be quickly replaced by a stab of sadness and something else. 

Something that made your heart clench a certain way. 

Though you knew it wasn’t the right thing to do; you ignored your consciousness as you walked closer to them, trying to pick up on what they were saying. Alas, they were too far away- but you could tell that they were having a deep conversation about something that made Anakin frown at her apologetically as she persistently attempted to get him to respond back. 

He stepped back, eyes catching sight of his Padawan. His customary tight expression was replaced by a soft contortion as he excused himself and began striding towards you. Senator Amidala’s gaze followed him wordlessly; shifting towards you as a sigh escaped her lips. You had always felt as though there had been something going on between her and your master. Alas, you were in no position to question Anakin about his personal life. 

“Y/N,” Anakin began gingerly, earning an ice-cold shoulder from your behalf as you marched past him; stomach clenching uncomfortably. 

Without turning to look back, you hurried towards your initial destination- the comforts of your bleak quarters. You needed to be as far away from him as possible, afraid that you’ll unleash the wrath that was entirely directed towards him. 

Right as you slammed the door of your room; it rudely snapped open- revealing the one individual you had tried escaping from. 

“What was that for?” Anakin growled out angrily, blowing the door shut behind him. 

You stood in the center of your room, your back facing him as you glared out of your window and into the commotion happening on the air traffic routes. 

When your silence became his apparent answer; Anakin gritted his teeth and advanced towards you, the weight of his hand on your shoulder holding you hostage as he tried twisting you around to face him. 

“Don’t touch me,” you snapped, stepping away from him as you shrugged his hand off of you. Anakin widened his eyes before trying to calm himself, the Force between you prodding at the growing pressure building in the room. 

“Why are you acting like a child?” He said calmly, voice giving away the shake of irritation and anger he was trying to hide, but to no avail. 

You shook your head, letting out a cold, humorless chuckle. 

“I bet Jedi business with Senator Amidala and everything else for that matter will always be a top priority. Why was I stupid enough to expect my own Master waiting for me to wake up in the medical bay?” You were thankful that you were facing the other way; although it would have probably made you feel better when the sound of your words left a hurt expression on the features of your young master. 

“Is this what it’s all about? If you really want to know, I was-” 

“Yeah yeah. General Skywalker went on a super dangerous mission to try and please the Council so they can see that you are perfectly able of earning the ‘Master’ ranking without having to train a Padawan. Good for you. Congratul-” You harshly interrupted him, waving your hand in the air nonchalantly. 

What caught you by surprise was how Anakin took that to his advantage as he grabbed hold of your wrist- roughly pulling you to finally face him. That completely stripped you of your confidence as you stared up at him- eyes wide and filled with bewilderment. Your noses were so close to brushing as he bitterly looked into your eyes; jaw clenching and unclenching firmly. 

“Be quiet!” He barked, making you wince as the roughness of his loud voice pierced your eardrums. 

“Why do you always have the tendency to paint me as the bad guy? Sure, I thought that I didn’t needa Padawan- but here we are. Did you ever stop to think that maybe I left Coruscant to follow the fool who shot you? Oh no, you can’t possibly put that through your thick head because ‘I don’t take you and your training seriously and there’s always something more important than you.’ Well, think again,” he spat out, brusquely letting go of your wrist before running a hand through his hair. 

Tears threatened to pool into your eyes as you stubbornly stared at the floorboard; the sound of Anakin pacing back and forth causing frustration to overwhelm you. 

“I’m sorry, Anakin.” 

He halted in his footsteps, the feeling of his deep-blue eyes boring into your self. 

“Yeah, you really should be.” 

You both stood stationary, neither of you facing each other. You tried to apologize again mentally, but he manipulated the Force to push you out of his mind. You sighed, your chest constricting as you turned to face him. 

Anakin looked ridiculously tall in your tiny quarters, it almost made you chuckle. His head was bent downwards, staring at his boots, fists clenched tightly into punches. You slowly- almost cautiously- walked to stand beside him, the moonlight blended with the series of lights emitted from the buildings in front of you lighting up both of your faces. You couldn’t help but notice the twinge of hurt and pain concealed behind his deep frown as he refused to look down at you. 

“I’m so sorry, Ani. I shouldn’t have been so ignorant.” 

Maybe it was the rawness behind your soft voice; or maybe it was the use of his nickname that you would often play with when you want to mess with him; that made Anakin finally shift his solid gaze onto you. You held onto your breath as you waited for him to say something. Anything. 

“I’m sorry too.” 

Shaking your head, you locked eyes with him- the action burning you from the inside out. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” 

“That’s not true. I left you without saying a word. It wasn’t very ‘Jedi’ of me to let my anger control me…but the only thing that filled my mind was how badly I wanted to hunt this person down and harm him…for hurting you,” Anakin said in a low voice, eyes dropping to your bandages framed by your Jedi robes. 

You were about to say something as you opened your mouth, but Anakin continued, his fingers brushing your jawline. “I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if something had happened to you.” 

All you could do was stare at him. You gaze swept across his troubled face- his scar, his knitted eyebrows, his pursed lips, his defined jawline, his messy hair. You gave into his touch, head tilting towards his fingers, a silent plead to strengthen the calloused pressure of his caressing. 

His hand moved his fingers, trailing an invisible map from the side of your face- and for a split second- to your lips before continuing onward to your throat. He let out a shaky breath, swallowing hard before letting go of you- too soon for your liking. He noticed the discontent his action brought into you; but stayed silent, his blue eyes seeking yours- the intensity making you feel as though he was memorizing every perfection, every imperfection that made you up. 

“Get some rest, Y/N, I’ll come see you tomorrow. Good night,” Anakin whispered to you softly, his gruff voice sounding like velvet as it trickled through you. 

You let go of a breath, (E/C) hues following his frame as he walked towards the door. You couldn’t help the vibration of his name escape your lips as he turned to face you, in question. 

“You know, if our roles had reversed that night, I would have reacted the same way.” 

That made him smile, the dim light coming through your windows revealing the gleam in his eyes. 

“I know.” 

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A/N 

Omg, this chapter is definitely one of my favs at the moment. I’m currently midway through rewatching ‘Revenge of the Sith’ but I’m very much avoiding the ending bc if I don’t watch it…  ✨ it never happened ✨ 

But anyway, I can’t believe that today I got noticed by one of my favoriteaccounts on this app @anakinswhore omfg the fact that you read and REBLOGGED my story means the world to me, bb!! I can promise you that when I finally write their smut scene (whenever that happens hehehe), I’ll dedicate it to u! 

Thank you to everyone who’s read, liked and reblogged the story up to now- much love

till next time ;) 

EnVy

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Taglist: 

@shads121@musictelevision@anakinswhore

Chapter III 

Anakin was 22. You were 18. 

Maybe it was due to the fact that you were so close in age- which often caused you both to forget your Padawan/Master relationship. Surely, this was why you began yelling at him, scolding him for tripping you in the hallway. Anakin smirked, trying to find reasoning behind his premature actions. 

“A Jedi must never lose themselves in their thoughts. What if my leg was actually a lightsaber aiming to cut your leg off, hm?” He raised a brow as you allowed yourself to roll your eyes. You lowered your mental shields, letting him hear a roll of colorful insults aimed his way. 

That made him pause and glare at you; but before he could answer- Obi-Wan Kenobi’s presence lingered around you. 

“Anakin, Padawan Y/N- I’m hoping you’re both not wasting your time bickering with each other. Tonight, Chancellor Palpatine is organizing an evening of celebrations- in honor of commemorating the Republic’s great advancement in the war. We are expected to guard him,” Obi-Wan stated, his glance shifting from you to his former Padawan. You exchanged looks with Anakin. 

When neither of you said anything, Master Obi-Wan cleared his throat before flashing a smile your way. 

“No questions? Wonderful! Then I must leave you to prepare. I have a meeting with the Council regarding some matters that need to be straightened out before tonight.” With that, he turned to his heels, his cloak gliding behind him. 

You let go of a breath you didn’t seem to notice was trapped in your airways. Anakin sensed your agitation as he folded his arms across his chest.

“What’s the matter? You’re able to mock and challenge your master to a fight, but you’re getting all queasy because you’ll be working at a party?” He huffed out, grinning widely as his ocean-blue eyes swept across you. 

You pursed your lips. “Well, you’re forgetting the fact that you’remy master- you make my job of irritating the stars out of you very easy…by just being yourself.” You ignored the way Anakin scowled at you as he tried to retaliate from your insult. “As for tonight, of course I’m nervous. The responsibility of protecting the Chancellor is something I never knew I’d have to take up as an assignment,” your gaze fixed itself upon the top of your black boots, your stance stiffening as you felt the weight of Anakin’s hand press against your shoulder. 

“The Council has faith in you…I have faith in you. Besides, Obi-Wan and I will be there with you. It’s just a safety precaution. I’m sure everything will go smoothly,” he reassured you, the intensity of his stare burning through you. You swallowed, smiling meekly up at him as he gives your shoulder a squeeze, his fingers slowly trailing off of you before he walked off. 

You stood there, mental shields up, wordlessly questioning the quick flutter your heart gave away at your Master’s touch. 

________________________________________________________________

Air traffic did not disperse as the sun waved goodbye to the planet lying in the heart of the Galaxy. 

You busied yourself that entire evening with preparing for the celebration. Your boots were polished, lightsaber shining as you worked on smoothing out your hair. Instead of keeping it up, you pinned a few of your (H/C) front strands to the back of your head, allowing the rest of your locks to pour over your shoulders.  

Obi-Wan told you that although you weren’t going to the celebration to enjoy yourself; you were to all look formal and presentable. 

So, instead of wearing your usual white robes and copper-colored cloak; you settled for your long, charcoal tunic. Your eminently thin waist was hugged by a thick leather belt that began under your breasts and halted above the curve of your hips. It looked more like a corset as it lay against your figure. Gloves identical to the one Anakin wore on his right hand hugged your two limbs; the material reaching up to the flesh above your elbows. The outfit was beautiful and intricately designed- a gift from your former Master on the eve of your eighteenth birthday. 

Right before the tragedy of her passing.

You swore you would never wear it out as it brought out too many broken memories- but tonight- you told yourself there was no more space for grief and pain. 

A knock echoed through the bareness of your quarters. You took in a deep breath, hand fluttering over your belt; fingers brushing against your lightsaber. You felt calmer. 

Slowly opening your front door, you locked gazes with Anakin Skywalker. 

For a second, you swore to the stars that his eyes widened as he stared at you. Whilst his eyes dragged themselves over your physique; you couldn’t help but have a similar reaction to his attire. 

He too- was dressed in all black, the shimmer of his lightsaber’s metal a pleasant contrast. The front of his tunic was laced with leather and his robe seemed to be a darker shade of black than his everyday one. As always, his sharp-features face were framed by his brown curls. But something that wasn’t always there was that glint in his eyes. The glint that seemed to have darkened. 

“Y/N…” he stuttered out before clearing his throat. “You look beautiful.” 

Surely, he caught sight of the blush that peppered against the skin on your face. Anakin smirked knowingly. 

“Why, thank you, Master,” you tried to hide your blush with a dramatic bow that earned you a low chuckle. “You don’t look so bad yourself!” 

Anakin cocked a brow, the scar that ran along following suit. “I know.” 

You rolled your eyes at him, before freezing as he extended out his concealed hand. 

“Shall we,” Anakin drawled on dramatically, head tilting downwards- blue eyes never leaving your face. 

“We shall,” you playfully responded, your hand gliding over the leather of his glove before securing your grip onto him. 

________________________________________________________________

You reluctantly placed distance between each other as you both sensed Obi-Wan’s approaching presence. You felt that Anakin was also hesitant to let you go- through the Force. That brought up a warm feeling to run its course through you. 

The three of you moved through the crowd of Upper-class citizens enjoying their time in the presence of their Chancellor. You didn’t really care who was who, as Obi-Wan halted a few times, conversating with people you felt as though you’ve never seen. 

Anakin did the same, only in his case, he had his Padawan beside him at all times, looking around cautiously. 

He glanced at you, grinning widely as he sensed your tension. He leaned downwards, grabbing onto your elbow to beckon your attention.

“Relax, my dear Padawan. People are drinking, talking, laughing. In a bit, Chancellor Palpatine will make a toast…talk about how excellent our progress has been in the war, everyone will clap and the night will be over in a few short hours,” he murmured against your ear, lips brushing against your flesh once or twice. You thanked the stars for your choice of attire as the length of your gloves completely concealed the wave of goosebumps that dotted your arms. 

And legs.

And spine. 

Since words couldn’t find their way through to your lips; you chewed on them and gave him a stiff nod. 

You looked up at him and it was as though once again, you were caught in some trance that dropped you within a vortex of confusion and warmth. 

Perhaps he felt it too since he never broke away from your stare. The Force was far too strong between you two. It seemed to have made you both obliterate the fact that you were in the middle of a celebration- all sorts of highly-respected individuals surrounding you.  

Anakin bit down on his bottom lip before letting go of it, mouth opening slightly as though he was about to… 

“Anakin, Y/N. The Chancellor is about to begin his speech. We must reside by him immediately,” Obi-Wan’s persistent voice pulled you both out of whatever whirlwind grasped onto you. 

You looked down, hair covering your face as you followed Anakin wordlessly to the front of the luxurious hall. 

Chancellor Palpatine greeted you all with a smile on his face. You couldn’t tell if it was genuine or not; but you simpered out a tight smile in return and stood beside your Master as they spoke. 

Then, he began his speech. The hall quietened down, eyes piercing the Supreme Chancellor and his Jedi protectors. You felt uneasy as you scanned the room. Anakin seemed to sense you, hushing you in his thoughts. You blankly stared forward, trying to nudge him out of your head. As always, he was too strong. Once you gave up trying to fight him, you finally accepted the soothing essence of his demeanor. 

Then it happened within the blink of an eye. You saw the glint of metal twirl above the crowd, the sound of a blast, the movement of your muscles, the screaming, the shouting, the pain…

Then what followed was your body’s collapse, gloved hands clutching your face…

And finally,

The desperate sound of your name on his lips. 

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A/N 

Hi! I see that more people have seen my fanfic and that makes me really really pleased! Thanks :) 

I’ve had this final scene in my mind for the past three days and so I’m very happy with the way this chapter turned out- especially since it has inspired me enough to actually plan out the following two chapters!! 

Till next time, you’re not ready for what’s to come hehehe

EnVy 

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Tags:@shads121 

Chapter II 

The sun’s early rays slid through your bare window, caressing your pale face as your eyes squinted in an attempt to hide. But, that was one failed battle right there; so you stretched slowly and yawned loudly. 

The coldness of your quarter’s floor tiles sent a jolt of electricity through your body. You hurriedly got into your robes, hastily tying a knot around your waist to prevent it from interfering with your movements. As always, you braided your long curls into a tight braid; carefully intertwining your Padawan braid into the larger one. A frown masked your tired features- knowing that if you’re late to training today; Anakin will kill you. Even worse; he’ll probably lecture you oh so early in the morning. A grumpy, lecturing Anakin was an Anakin you tried to avoid at all times, especiallyso early in the day. 

Latching your lightsaber onto your belt, you swung open the door leading you out of your quarters- colliding into something incredibly solid. You stumbled backwards, only to realize that the solid thing indeed had hands that pulled you back onto your feet. 

One metallic hand and one covered in flesh. 

You widened your eyes as you looked up into the deep blue eyes of your master; who disapprovingly stared down at you- jaw tightly clenched, shoulders flexed. You sent him a lopsided smile. 

“Good morning, Master! It’s such a wonderful time of the da-” 

“You’re late. Again.” 

You frowned in confusion, cocking your head to the side. “You said the crack of daw-” 

“Yes, exactly. And that was exactly ten minutes ago.” Anakin huffed, mirroring your expression, tilting his own head to the side. 

You dumbly stared at him searching his face for an answer to one very important question. Is he joking? 

He searched your own face and perhaps it was the fact that he knew he was being way too hard on you…or it was the way the morning rays swished against your skin- something shifted within him. 

For a split second only. 

Clearing his throat, Anakin shook his head and grabbed you by the shoulder, pulling you with him as he began heading further away from the Jedi sleeping quarters. You looked at him, eyes widening. 

“Master, my door…” 

He silently answered you via slamming the door from a distance- the Force vibrating around you. You rolled your eyes as he sent you a sly smirk. Together you made your way through the Temple and into the training ground. 

_______________________________________________________

Four hours later, you were lying on the hard ground covered by a slick layer of sweat, chest heaving up and down, teeth biting hard on the bottom of your lip in frustration. 

Anakin on the other hand, was leaning against a pillar, arms crossed over his broad chest as a smirk carved itself onto his features. You glared at him, rolling onto your side, resting your body weight on your forearm and elbow. 

“I’m sick of repeating the same fighting techniques. I want something more,” you growled out, earning a raised brow reaction from your master. 

“Well, when you perfect the art of lightsaber combat, perhaps then I’ll show you something else,” he replied, his voice low and humorless, although the glint in his eyes told you otherwise. 

You decided to play on. 

“It’s okay if you admit that you have forgotten what else there is for me to learn. I can just go ask Obi-Wan or something…” you trailed off, eyes widening slightly as you tried masking a chuckle at the immediate change in Anakin’s posture. 

He almost immediately pushed himself off the pillar, jaw clenched so tightly, you were afraid he’d grind and break his own teeth. You picked yourself up, back straightening as he strode towards you. You insistently continued staring into his eyes- the Force surrounding the both of you as the tension thickened. Anakin stopped in front of you, his brown curls falling over his eyes as he craned his neck to look down at you. 

That was when you began feeling nervous. But you tried to hide that feeling, knowing that Anakin would thrive if he found out that his actions did exactly what he had wanted them to force out of you. He leered down at you as you widened your eyes, realizing that he did in fact, sense your nervousness. You inwardly swore at yourself. 

“You think you’re so tough. Why don’t you fight me then…since you keep throwing jabs at how lousy of a Jedi I am,” Anakin purred out, his hot breath washing across your face as you swallowed thickly, palms sweating. You concluded to the fact that he didn’tmake you nervous; you just felt small and insignificant when he towered over you in such a manner. 

Yes, yes, that was it. 

“I-…alright,” you meekly breathed out, avoiding his intense stare. Though your peripheral vision caught onto Anakin’s grin. He moved backwards, slowly pulling out his lightsaber. You still couldn’t look at him, your heart pounding as you mentally slapped yourself for being so cocky. 

The hum of his lightsaber shook you out of your trance, forcing you to finally look at your master. Although you could tell that he wasn’t taking you that seriously, caution marked his face, his force signature betraying his feeling of uncertainty. What you didn’t know was that he wasn’t feeling uncertain because he thought he couldn’t win this fight. Of course he would. 

He was uncertain as to whether this was a good idea because even though he liked to toy with you- he didn’t want to hurt you. But even though he didn’t want to admit it to himself, or to anyone for that matter- he knew that you were ready for a real fight.

You mimicked his stance, the hum of your own lightsaber grazing through the air. If you weren’t paying such close attention to Anakin, you would have missed his nod of approval. You smirked. 

Without a warning, he charged towards you, his steps quick and precise. The training room amplified the sounds of your sabers making contact- each second connecting them in a different position. You grunted as he growled, your muscles pushing your harder as you fought against your master. 

Suddenly, as you expected him to lash at you from the right side; he dodged downwards, swooping at your legs, bringing you down with a loud thud. Taken by surprise, whilst you tried pick yourself up, he beckoned your saber out of your hand with the Force before pinning you against the floor, his gloved, mechanical arm that clutched at your weapon; lazily resting against your forearm situated above your head.

Both of you were breathing heavily as Anakin did not move off of you. It was as though the entire world had stopped in that moment. You lost yourself in his wild, adrenaline-filled eyes as he quietly searched your face for any signs of real pain. He leaned in, leaving minimal space between you both. 

“I’m impressed. I really thought that I will bring you down during the first three minutes of our spar. Well done.” 

Your eyes widened as you stared up at Anakin. 

“Did you just…compliment me?” 

Anakin grinned, effortlessly hoisting himself off of you, pulling you up with him. 

“For all one knows, you put up a good fight. But, don’tforget yourself. Being too presumptuous will only lead to your own downfall,” your master muttered, patting the dust off his robe. “Come now, you must eat.” Without a glance to see if you would follow him; he strode out of the training ground, relying on the Force to sense you, your feelings and movements. 

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A/N 

Hello there! Thank you to anyone who’s taken a moment to read through my story. TBH, I don’t really know where I’m going with this story- plot-wise - so I’m just going with the flow. Perhaps I’m being influenced by the Force to write the chapters out the way I do hehe. 

No but really, thanks for reading and see you all next time! 

EnVy 

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Tags:@shads121

The Secret Son - A.S

Masterlist,Requesting Rules,Guidelines 

Anakin Skywalker x Fem Reader

About: The reader falls pregnant with Anakin’s child and instead of telling him, she leaves the Jedi Order goes back to her home planet. Years later, a war takes place on her planet and she is attacked and finds herself and her son reuniting with Jedi she truly loves.

Warnings: mention of nausea, food, violence, blood, shooting guns, death of children (what is a result of war), mention of sex, plenty of fluff, swearing, and all the feels!

A/N: We get to see Jedi Master Anakin in this.. oh my heart… Please reblog my work to support me!

You knew it was stupid, dangerous, and unprofessional to strike up a heated romance with your fellow Jedi classmate - but none of that stopped either one of you from sneaking around at night, getting hot and heavy during quiet moments on missions, and going as far as almost getting found out by your Jedi Master.

Part of you couldn’t put your finger on what made you so captivated by Anakin, perhaps it was his hair that rested just below his ears, or the scar on his perfectly sculpted face, or maybe his eyes that had glimmers of both hope and frustration, or even his contagious laugh and scowl.

All that you knew now was that you needed to leave the Jedi Order, cut ties with everyone you once knew, and return back home to Alderaan and shield your secret from the universe. Every single other outcome had the exact same end, you knew deep down that no matter what you would crush not just your dreams and future, but also Anakin’s.

Everything happened so fast, one minute you were spending time alone in the Jedi Temple and now you were carrying a new life inside of you.

“Anakin!” you gasped at his hands taking you by the waist “We could get caught!”

Anakin smirked and planted a soft kiss on your ear before whispering “Not if we’re quiet.”

Your cheeks started to burn and turn a deep shade of pink, truly wanting to be touched and to touch the Jedi, you gave in and made a promise to yourself to keep quiet and to never engage in such risky behaviour in the temple again.

Anakin panted and wiped the sweat from his forehead, pushing away his soft curls that stuck to the sweat, your arms reached up to him and caressed his face before dressing yourself quickly as the sound of a Jedi Masters boots came closer and closer.

An unsettling feeling started to weigh heavily in both your stomach and mind, you couldn’t figure it out - you and Anakin both just bonded and there were no issues, so why are you panicking? You haven’t been caught red-handed and you were both safe from harm.

“I love you Ani,” you whispered in Anakin’s ear, straightening your robes.

Anakin shot you a loving glance, “I love you too,” he whispered back, standing up straight with his hands behind his back.

Training became harder than it used to be, your breasts were tender and swollen making it hard to wield your lightsaber, your mind fog got in the way during your lessons when teaching the younglings, and you could no longer stand to be around food because the smell of the morning juicy apples and evening thick gravy turned your stomach upside down.

You didn’t need someone to tell you what you already knew, you could feel the life inside of you grow stronger as more time passed by, if you didn’t leave now you wouldn’t be able to forgive yourself for getting in the way of Anakin’s dreams.

You stared at yourself, your robes, and your lightsaber, reflecting on everything you had learnt, everything you had been through, the younglings who looked up to you, and the masters who trusted you and fought hard to help you reach your potential as a female Jedi who didn’t discover the force until later on in childhood.

How could you throw this away? How could you waste your potential and everyone’s time? How could you successfully live a lie?

Obi-Wan was behind you with his hand resting on your shoulder, his soft voice breaking you from your ocean of thoughts.

“Is everything alright, Y/N?”

The once young and ambitious apprentice who found you on Hoth with his kind and caring Master Qui-Gon, now a master who could see the way you looked at his padawan Anakin and the way he looked back.

If you had to announce your leave to anyone without fear of crushing them, surely it would be him, right?

Swallowing hard and closing your eyes for a moment, you let out a big sigh and turned around slowly to face him, opening your eyes to meet his concerned gaze felt like tiny needle pricks spread across your chest. You were scared of letting him down.

“It’s not Master,” you admitted, taking your lightsaber out and handing it to him “something has happened and I must return to my home.”

Obi-Wan glanced down at your lightsaber and then back at you, not taking it “To Alderaan? What requires you to return there-”

“I cannot say,” you interrupted “but I must go, please make this easy for Ani-Anakin to understand. I care for him deeply and my absence could get in the way of his success.”

Obi-Wan studied you closely, his suspicions had been confirmed and while he wanted to scold you and approach his Padawan -  he could sense that there was something much more going on than attachment. You were also aware of him and Satine, Obi-Wan knew you would never speak of it out of respect for him, so he nodded his head and refused to press you further on the matter.

He gently accepted your lightsaber although he wanted nothing more than to give it back, knowing what you endured on Hoth.

“Will you be needing any assistance?”

You shook your head “No, I’m a pretty good pilot thanks to your Padawan.” you smiled sadly, walking away.

Obi-Wan broke out into a smile, “May the force be with you,” he said quietly.

Looking back at him with your tear-filled eyes, you waved “and also with you.”

“How long can we keep this up, Ani?” you asked sleepily, your head resting on his rising and falling chest.

Anakin looked down at you and ran his fingers through your hair “for as long as we can, my love,” he replied softly “one day we may even get married-”

“Married?!” you gasped in disbelief “How could we hide such a thing? I want to show you off as my husband with pride, not hide it.”

Ani stayed quiet, the plans of him proposing swirling through his head again, wondering when and where would be the right time, asking himself if you would even say yes.

“One day we won’t ever have to hide it,” he mumbled “attachments aren’t such a bad thing-”

You sat up in his bed and started to get upset, you truly loved Anakin but you knew that having a family was too dangerous for a well-known Jedi who had money placed on their death.

“They are when you lose someone you care about,” you whispered

Anakin sat up too, retracting his hand from your hair.

“I know what it’s like to lose that someone-”

“Anakin I’m not saying you haven’t-”

Anakin continued to speak “I lost my mother, who I cared for deeply - that loss hasn’t stopped me from falling for you, has it?”

“No-”

“I’m afraid to lose you, Y/N, why do you think I train so hard? You and my mother are my motivation to become a powerful Jedi, to stop people from dying-”

You put your head in your hands and pressed your closed eyes into your palms, tiny little stars spreading across in front of you.

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore, Ani, I don’t want the pain of losing you to become real.”

“She left?!” Anakin freaked and paced around the room, no longer able to control his emotions “And you didn’t tell me!”

“Y/N left because she had to.” His Master replied calmly “she is safe Anakin, that is all you need to know.”

“All I need to know?!” Ani huffed “She cannot get by on her own! You’ve seen how I’ve come to her aid on missions-”

Obi-Wan raised his hand, outstretching his palm.

“If we did not feel it would be safe for her, she wouldn’t have gone alone, Anakin. Y/N is quite capable of taking care of herself.”

Anakin shook his head and clenched his jaw, his hands bunching into tight fists.

“If anything happens to her-”

“Nothing is going to happen Anakin -  if it did you know that we would do our very best to help her.”

The guilt pained you every moment of every single day, the bigger your bump became, the bigger the guilt of leaving Anakin without explanation came back to bite you.

Your pregnancy wasn’t easy - how could it? You were alone, in a small house that struggled to trap and create heat as you were surrounded by the snowy mountains, and you relied heavily on those around you to help fetch your food and furniture for your child’s room.

With each kick, wriggle, and movement your child gave you, you placed your hand on your bump, closed your eyes and imagined that Anakin was with you; bringing you to tears and falling down on your knees.

Tensions were building up and you heard the rumours of war, death, and violence - you had seen it all already on your missions with Anakin and his master Obi-Wan and you knew just how brutal they could be; you were on death’s door more than once thanks to General Grievous, Count Dooku and  Ventriss.

You started to question what universe you were bringing your child into and if leaving the Jedi order and continuing your pregnancy was the right choice.

“Do you see yourself having children?” Anakin asked you one evening.

The two of you sitting on the balcony enjoying your time off whilst your masters were in an important meeting.

The soft breeze stroked your hair back behind your shoulder, you didn’t want to react the same way that you did to his marriage question which resulted in the both of you not speaking for a week.

“I’d like to,” you replied, “one day when it’s safe enough for me to raise them.”

A small smile crept upon his face, you caught it in the corner of your right eye and started to blush, trying not to get shy.

‘he’s thinking of me becoming a mother?’

Anakin often thought about the day you would announce that you were carrying his child, the months he could count done and watch see your bump grow, the day when you would finally go into labour and cradle the product of love you both made in your protective arms.

“I see myself having children,” Ani admitted “I often believe that I’ll be a better father than Jedi.”

Going into labour was long, stressful, and painful. You were standing up from the table and felt water burst from within you, trickling down your legs and forming into a puddle on the floor. You tried not to panic but knowing that you were alone and had no one to help you deliver this baby, you couldn’t help but panic.

Anakin had nightmares, similar to that of his mother dying, but instead, you were on the floor, screaming and crying, calling out his name. Your face was pale and your skin clammy, your eyes slowly going dim before he would wake up drenched in sweat.

Anakin often sensed something else around him, a deep pull that he couldn’t recognise or explain, he could feel its fear, its happiness, he could feel it entirely disappear the closer you got into your labour.

Closing your eyes, you tried to reach out, begging for Qui-Gon despite him being gone, begging for Obi-Wan, begging for any Jedi master that you could to come and help you, save you from dying before you could bring your child into this world and see their father in their eyes.

Unable to stop yourself from pushing, you tried to control your breathing and tugged up your skirt from covering your knees so you could pull down your soaked underwear, beads of sweat formed across your forehead and chest.

“Please-” you cried, feeling faint “Please-”

Darkness. Darkness everywhere. No one and nothing, until the cries of your child pierced your ears, and the feeling of someones hand supporting your back so you weren’t laying out cold on the floor.

Slowly opening your eyes, you were stunned, Obi-Wan was supporting you and holding your child in his arms, his eyes staring down at his Padawans offspring.

“It’s a boy,” Obi-Wan smiled again.

“Obi-Wan?!”

Obi-Wan smiled and turned to face you, he handed you your newborn gently, you opened out your arms and pulled your baby into your chest, the very sight of him bringing you to tears.

Most newborns looked nothing like their parents or relatives for weeks, months even, you were a blank canvas until you were twelvemonths old - but not your son. No. He was Anakin from his ambitious eyes, his nose, full lips, and ahead of thick, sandy blonde hair.

“He looks just like him,” he said softly.

There it was. The guilt again.

“H-How is he?” you croaked.

Since leaving, Anakin continued to work hard but his bouts of inappropriate anger and mood swings got him into trouble, he was still just as ambitious and passionate as you remembered, but he refused to be around women again.

“We handed him the task of being Senator Amidala’s bodyguard, he refused,” Obi-Wan explained, watching your tiny bundle of joy reach out to grab your finger.

“And Ahsoka?”

Obi-Wan sighed “she gets disappointed and fed up at times but he refuses to fail her.”

“Good,” you replied “Ahsoka has just as much potential as her master.”

As the years went by more and more civilians were being murdered, tortured, caught in the middle of a war they had no involvement in. Children without parents, wives without husbands, parents without children, Alderaan was slowly turning into shambles and many other planets were being obliterated one by one.

Screaming, blasters and yelling filled your area and you knew that you had to try and flee or hide if running was no longer an option.

“Luke!” you panicked, grabbing your son’s bag and stuffing it with food and clothes “Luke we need to go now!”

A small boy with soft skin and long blonde hair peeked from behind the door, his eyes were wide and full of fear, his tiny hands were shaking.

“Mummy I’m scared,” he started to cry, slowly walking towards you.

Quickly zipping up his bag you lifted up his chin with your finger, the fright on his face hurt you so deeply - reminding you of Anakin and the face he might’ve pulled at the announcement of your departure.

Luke was just like his father, from his looks to his laugh, to how he talks, sometimes you questioned if any part of you was in him at all. He often asked if he had a dad and why he only had a mother - you had no choice but to lie - if the wrong ears caught wind of a baby Skywalker, you’d lose him before he could even have a chance.

“Baby,” you said calmly “we need to leave, you’re going to keep this bag on your back and hold onto my hand tight.”

More screaming. More crying. More yelling. More banging. More shooting.

Tears started to pool in his eyes, making his vision go glassy.

“Mummy-”

“Luke, you need to listen to me,” you tried to keep calm “you keep your head down at all times and keep walking, run if I start running, and do not say a word to anyone. Okay?”

Luke started to nod, his tiny hand reached up to wipe his tears, you pulled him into your arms and planted a kiss on his forehead, catching the scent of his hair.

You couldn’t lose him, you’d rather die than lose the only part of Anakin you have left.

“If we get split up, you run and run and don’t stop until you find somewhere safe where you can hide. I will come for you but if I’m not back by sunrise-” your own voice started to crack “you keep on running until you see a man that looks like Uncle Ben.”

Before you could say anymore, a loud blast rang through the air, the ground shook and your door flew from its hinges. Your house was filled with tall, strong men and scary looking droids that you hadn’t seen in years.  

Pulling Luke’s arm you took off running towards the back door but stopped when you turned around to see that your son was frozen; his bag was on the floor, his hands covered his eyes and his loud cries pierced your chest.

Some mothers left their children in these moments, yours did - but as desperate as you were to live, you were more than ready to die if it meant Luke got to see another second or minute before the two of you would be nothing more than a number, a statistic, a victim.

Falling to your knees in front of him, you threw your arms around Luke, shielding him from the yellow eyes staring at you in the dark, from the blasts and hands that reached out to grab you.

You closed your eyes, remembering his eyes, his soft skin, the smell of his hair, the sound of his laugh, bringing you an image of what life could have been with his father - on another planet at a different time; Luke playing with ships as his father taught him everything he knew about flying, and days outside watching Anakin chase Luke and tickle him.

“Do you see yourself having children?”

Say no. Don’t give him hope.

“I’d like to,” you replied, “one day when it’s safe enough for me to raise them.”

How could you be that deep in denial?

“I see myself having children,” Ani admitted “I often believe that I’ll be a better father than Jedi.”

Tell him he’s being foolish, that he can’t be both.

“I love you Ani,” you whispered in Anakin’s ear.

Take it back.

“I love you too,” he whispered back.

Don’t believe him.

“attachments aren’t such a bad thing-”

End it now.

“They are when you lose someone you care about,”

End it. Now.

Luke’s cries and screams were all you could hear as hands reached out, clutching around your arms and neck in an attempt to pull you away. You could feel your child moving away from you, you tried to pull him closer to you but it was no use.

“Not him!” you cried out “You can take me, don’t hurt my son!” you begged.

Anakin’s face dropped at the sight of a large bruise peeking from underneath your sleeve, he took hold of you and yanked up the fabric, your black and blue arm now on full display.

“Ani! Stop!” you hissed, pulling back your arm and stepping back.

“Y/N, you told me you handled it, who did this to you?”  Anakin demanded, closing in on you.

You started to tear up, remembering what happened when you outsmarted another apprentice you were left alone to train with.

“No more missions,” Anakin answered for you, his face suddenly softening as you began to cry.

You shook your head “It wasn’t on a mission, Ani…”  You slowly pulled off your vest and revealed the bruises on your chest and down your spine.

“It was someone we train with.”

The protective rage Anakin felt that day came back in full swing when he found your life and his sons being drained.

He moved fast and didn’t miss a beat, swinging his lightsaber, blocking bullets and sending them flying backwards, using his hands to push them away so forcefully they fell apart and collapsed into pieces.

Anakin’s heart became warm and joyful, yet full of hurt, terror and rage at the sight of you.

You were barely alive, but you had been alive this entire time, in one piece - Anakin’s nightmares often showed you broken and bloody, in pieces and unrecognisable.

At the very sight of the young boy, he could finally recognise the strange pull he had felt inside of him since the day you left - he knew that the boy was his. He had a son.

You scrunched your eyes shut, gripping onto Luke as the sound of the screams and bodies falling to the ground finally ceased, you were afraid that someone much worse had come along and was saving you best for last - or even planning to take you away and torture you for answers you didn’t have.

“Y/N,” a familiar voice called out softly “it’s okay, you can open your eyes.”

You felt as if the wind had been knocked out of you, as if someone’s hands were wrapped around your throat, choking you.

The voice belonged to Anakin.

Slowly opening your eyes, a tall man stood in front of you, his hair now long and styled like Qui-Gon’s and small bristles started to form a beard. His shoulders were much broader and his eyes were darker, appearing to be more tired. The scar on his face was no longer a pale purple, but now a shade of white.

“Ani,” you gasped in disbelief “it’s you.”

Anakin slowly walked over and fell onto his knees, tears of joy and hurt streamed down his face, he pulled you into his arms and squeezed you, his nose brushing against your ear.

“I never thought I’d see you again,” he cried.

“I’m sorry for leaving,” you replied, also crying “I had to”

“To protect our son,” Anakin barely spoke out, slowly pulling away.

Luke had his hands cupped over his eyes and he was still shaking and crying out of fear, his hair stood up in all directions and his bag was now covered in soot and blood.

“Luke,” you said calmly “it’s okay now, you can open your eyes.. there’s someone who is here to see you.”

Anakin felt sick, his palms were clammy and his eyes continued to pool with tears, he watched as his own son slowly removed his hands from his face, his big eyes staring back at him like a reflection in a mirror.

Anakin couldn’t believe what who in front of him - his future, his product of love, his tie to you forever.

“I am your father,” Ani announced softly, holding out his hand.

Luke glanced at his father’s outstretched hand and then back into his eyes, instead of taking his hand, he ran into his arms, placing his tiny arms around him and snuggling his face into his father’s chest.

Anakin held Luke, stroking his hair and planting a soft kiss on his head.

You watched, fearful of Anakin pulling away and saying goodbye, the doubts and guilt over what you had done started to sting at your heart.

“We need to leave,” Anakin said, pulling away from the close embrace and reaching out to hold your hand.

You didn’t refuse and instead, you squeezed his hand; ready to start again.

“As long as I’m alive, the two of you will never be in danger again.”

- - -

“I love you,” Anakin said softly as you brushed his hair in the garden, the two of you watching Luke play with his toy ships.

“I love you too, Ani,” you replied, feeling the baby inside you kick their feet.

“Do you have any names picked out?” he asked.

You paused for a moment before tying back his hair into a loose bun “for a girl, I like Leia.”