A/N: Sorry sorry sorry!!! this chapter totally got away from me, and I always forget how long it takes me to write smut lmao, anyways! it’s finally here!! thank you for being patient with me! I love you all so much and I hope you enjoy! :))
Chapter 6
Y/N’s forehead was pressed against the smooth surface of a window pane that overlooked the land that she would be residing in for the rest of her life. She was currently flooded with the overwhelming feeling of deja-vu, from that very first moment on the train ride that brought her closer to her greatest doom. And in the same regards brought her towards the greatest euphoria she’s ever known. How unfair that this is where her train-ride ended. In a never-ending cycle of torment. The push and pull of what she had to do and what she actually wanted. Deja-vu came to her in the form of despair that sat in the pit of her stomach.
The girl felt as though she were trapped. Trapped in a home she didn’t want to live, trapped in a life that was thrust upon her.
Good thing she was brought to this very estate for practice.Zeke had relayed to her that the reason they were staying at his estate for the last week before their wedding was to become accustomed to their new roles as husband and wife. However, if their marriage was anything like her current treatment she was destined for a life of misery. Though, she shouldn’t have expected anything more. Maybe Y/N should be grateful that most of their time was spent in different corners of this impressive home. The quiet honing in on them in the most violent of ways. Y/N was surprised that she had not yet been brought to insanity. But it was better than being subjected to Zeke’s lectures. She had already garnered four of them over the past two days they had been here.
A deep sigh escaped the girl’s lips. Fogging up the window from the heat of her breath. She dragged a finger through the condensation. A mindless swirl left behind from her delicate touch. She jumped when the double doors to the drawing room burst open, signaling the arrival of her husband-to-be.
“Please, I beg of you to have some form of restraint and not sit on the windowsill as you are.” Zeke snapped, the first words of the day of course being a reprimand. Y/N did not apologize. Just simply slid off the raised structure where her feet landed on the marble floor with a dull thud.
“Good morning to you too, sir.” Y/N mumbled, smoothing out her skirt, trying to rid of any other reason for Zeke to harp on her.
Zeke sighed, removing his glasses to run a hand over his harrowed features, seemingly tired of his unruly bride-to-be. But he must’ve thought her rude behavior was a lost cause as he went on to discuss the matter which brought him into this room.
“I’ve come to tell you that I’ve been called away from the estate.”
Y/N perked up at his words, “Why?” She asked unabashedly.
“An emergency.” He replied simply, “A house-call has been made for my father and he acquires my assistance.”
“When are you leaving?” Y/N questioned, sounding a little more eager than she should. Zeke looked at her pointedly but continued on.
“He needed me as soon as possible, so I’ve already made arrangements for my carriage.” Zeke explained, Y/N nodded, and then paused, already anticipating the lecture he was bound to give. Zeke did not disappoint.
“You are to stay here.” He said, “I expect you to behave yourself. I will be gone for two or three days and when I return it would be fantastic if the order of this estate remained intact.”
Y/N blinked in surprise at the hint of sarcasm in Zeke’s tone. She never expected any form of emotion from her fiance other than strict rigidness. The girl refrained herself from laughing, at the absurdity, but nodded obediently instead. Mostly in hopes that this conversation will end and he would leave faster. And it seemed it worked as Zeke pursed his lips, unable to find yet another thing about the girl to chastise.
“Then I will see you when I return.” He said, before bowing. Y/N returned his departing words with a half-hearted curtsy. And then he turned on his heel, leaving her alone for the first time in weeks.
~
A soft breeze disturbed Eren’s brunette locks as he stood at the precipice of the estate. His breathing was controlled and determined, as he tried to calm his racing mind. However, that was a challenge he had been trying to conquer for the past two days. He had been on an unforeseen journey for three days now. Sleeping in random taverns that he came across during his travels. And the whole time his mind had been occupied with the thought of her in the arms of his brother. It made him sick to his stomach.
He never wanted to return. But he knew he had to at one point. It was inevitable. Just like the wedding he was expected to be at, which was scheduled to be in four days. His breathing quickened as he felt the time slip through his fingers like sand. No matter how hard he tried to get it to stop it kept sliding on by, with no desire to listen to his wishes. Time seemed to be an evil thing.
Eren shook his head at the harrowing thought. Four days was enough. It was enough time to clear his head and learn to be happy for his brother. Learn to let go of Y/N. But he needed space. And that was why, instead of being in the same house as his brother and the fiance that should have been his, his feet had carried him to a place he was certain was completely empty. Obviously, Eren should be back at his father’s estate, helping with the business and god forbid, the horrible wedding. But he couldn’t do it. Not yet at least. So Eren took one last deep breath before taking a step towards his brother’s seemingly empty estate.
~
The sun outside began to dip below the horizon, the rooms spilling over with the pink hues of the sunset. At this point during her stay, the young girl was now used to the strange looks she had been receiving from her fiance’s staff all day. Though, it’s not like Y/N could blame them. They were probably shocked for someone to be so happy within these walls. And here Y/N was, practically skipping as she hummed a random tune, exploring the house at her own free will.
Y/N never realized the glorious taste of freedom until she was finally left on her own. Away from strict rules and admonished glares from her fiance and his father. It felt like she could finally breathe again. She just had to ignore the crushing feeling that would slip between the cracks every so often. Y/N didn’t want to think about how this might be her last instance of feeling so free. So instead of dreading the end of her false sense of liberty, she relished in it. A soft smile on her face, as she examined the art that Zeke had placed on his walls. He had quite the eye for this sort of thing. Or perhaps, more likely, his mother had quite the eye. Y/N didn’t think the man had an artistic bone in his body. It made much more sense that this house was so beautiful at the hands of his mother.
The girl laughed softly at the thought, her head tilted slightly as she looked over a painting of a young couple captured in a meadow for the rest of eternity. They looked so blissfully at peace. A strange sense of jealousy pierced through the girl’s chest. But yet again, she ignored it, shaking her head slightly as she moved on to the next painting. Her eyes desperately searched for something new to fixate on so she didn’t have to think about her wedding. Which was almost laughable. Never in a million years did she ever think she would dread her wedding. But she did. And now she was forcing herself not to cry as she lost the battle of ignoring her troubles.
Luckily, she was interrupted by a door opening, revealing a member of Zeke’s staff.
“Mr. Jaeger has arrived, Madam.” The man said, and Y/N’s heart dropped. She didn’t think that her freedom would end so quickly. She was only given one night to herself when she expected two more.
Y/N tried to hide the disappointment on her face as she nodded at the man. “Very well, send him in so I shall greet him.”
If I don’t greet him like a proper wife he’ll probably lock me in the basement, she refrained from adding. The man bowed before exiting the room and Y/N turned back towards the painting, hoping she could twist her features in an expression that didn’t show her true detestment of Zeke. She held her breath as she heard the door behind her open once more. Her shoulders stiff, Y/N opened her mouth to greet him, but suddenly he spoke, and it felt as though all the wind was knocked out of her.
“Miss Y/L/N.”
Y/N whipped around to find Eren, standing at the edge of the room, his expression dumbfounded, his irises sparking with shock. And Y/N would have been embarrassed, with the way her lip quivered at the sight of him. Every emotion she tried to ignore coming back in full force. She couldn’t handle it on her own. All of a sudden she found herself crossing the room to find herself in his arms. She never realized how much she needed Eren until he was standing in front of her now.
Instinctively, Eren’s arms circled around her waist, pulling her into him. The press of her chest against his own seemed to bring him back to life from the three day coma that passed him by. His hand wound itself in her hair, a breath of relief escaping him as she leaned into his touch.
“What are you doing here?” He asked, pulling back to look in her eyes. They searched his face, her eyebrows furrowed with confusion.
“You didn’t know I was here?”
Eren shook his head, “No, I had no idea. I thought you were back at my fathers with…”
He didn’t want to say his name. And now it was Y/N’s turn to shake her head.
“No, he took me here the night of the ball.” She explained, her fingers subconsciously toying with the hairs at the nape of Eren’s neck. “I wanted to tell you but they put me in a carriage with no warning. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to meet you in the garden. Were you waiting for me?”
“I was.” Eren swallowed, his tone strained with the hurt that plagued him since that night. Y/N’s expression softened, her hand finding his face hoping that her touch would bring him the same sense of comfort that he brought her. He shut his eyes, hiding the teal that she’s grown to adore and released a shaky breath.
“Why did he bring you here?” He asked after a moment of silence, he opened his eyes again, showcasing more of that hurt.
“He wanted me to become accustomed to being the lady of the house.” Y/N laughed bitterly, separating herself from Eren, and turning away from him.
“Did that include…” He struggled to get the second half of his sentence out, “spending the night together.”
Y/N’s head snapped towards Eren, “What? No, of course not. Zeke’s never been one to go against societal expectations. And I’m not at all interested in sharing any affections with that man.”
Eren took notice of the offense that twisted her features. “Please, forgive me. I’m not accusing you of anything. I just…”
“You just…?” Y/N breathed, taking a step closer to Eren, his gaze trained on the floor beneath them.
“I hate the thought of you with anyone else.”
Y/N sucked in a breath when his eyes met hers with the resounding clash of his statement. Words were lost on her tongue as he took a step closer, his gaze burning over her. The flames of want and need lapping at her skin, burning her with the proof that she would forever and always be his.
“I don’t want to be with anyone else.” She whispered.
“Then will you have me as I am?” Eren said, his eyes pleading, “Will you put me out of this misery and receive my foolish heart which is already irretrievably yours.”
Y/N let out a breathy laugh, tears once again swimming in her eyes, though this time for a much better reason. “My heart has been lost to you since the very moment you kissed me. Maybe even before that.”
Eren’s own grin danced across his features as his hands cupped her face, his touch gentle, almost unsure. It was as if he couldn’t believe that this moment was real, that she would slip away from his grasp if he held on too tightly. Y/N wanted to ease his worries.
“I’m yours. Every single part of my being belongs to you.” She told him, and she had more to say. She was going to tell him how she was willing to give him everything she had to offer, hoping that he would take it and give her the same. But before she could his lips had found hers and there was nothing else to do but fall into his kiss.
The two became intertwined, lost in each other’s touch, hands wandering until it came to the point where Eren didn’t know where Y/N began and he ended. His grip was tight on her waist, as he tried to restrain himself from taking her right in the middle of his brother’s drawing room. Eren forced himself to pull away from Y/N’s lips.
“Will you allow me to escort you to your bedroom?” Eren murmured, his thumb rubbing slow circles into her side. “It’s getting rather late.”
“Please tell me that you’re not rejecting my advances again.” Y/N chuckled, though her body was still flushed with slight embarrassment. “I don’t believe my dignity can take it.”
Eren laughed, smoothing a palm over her hair and leaving a soft kiss against her forehead. “I was only trying to uphold the illusion of propriety. I was fully intending on joining you in your bedroom. If you’ll let me?”
Y/N answered his final question with another fervent kiss, her hands finding his face to pull him in as close as possible. She could feel how he smiled into her lips, his hands were back around her waist. They were lost in their lust once more, until they couldn’t handle the barrier of clothing any longer.
WIth hands intertwined, they rushed out of the room, practically running through the hall until they found her assigned room at the other side of the house. As they stopped in front of the oak door that would give them the privacy they so desperately wanted, Y/N’s hands shook as she fumbled with the door knob. Eren, taking notice of this, covered her hand with his palm.
“Are you certain you want to do this?” Eren asked, removing her hand from the engraved medal to press it to his chest. She could feel his heartbeat under his cotton shirt. It was beating at the same frantic rate hers was. Somehow, that relieved her from all her worries.
“Of course I do.” She said, and to prove her point, she effortlessly opened the door revealing where she had been spending the past couple of nights.
“Even if it’s against all reason.” Eren questioned, as he followed her into the room, gently shutting the door behind him.
“I believe we are both aware that we lack a certain sense of decorum.” Y/N laughed, sitting atop her mattress, bouncing slightly from the momentum. Eren offered her a crooked grin as he stepped closer to her, his knees brushing against her own.
“We’ve never been one to uphold responsibility, have we?” He said, propping his knee up on the bed. Y/N instinctively fell back on the plush surface of her mattress, her arms linking around his neck pulling him into her. Eren’s body covered her completely, his hips pressing into her own offered her the proof of his need for her.
“I can hear my mother’s heart break from one hundred miles away.” Y/N teased, her legs wrapping around his hips. She bit her lip as he immediately started to grind into her, his erection pressing up against her center.
“My grandfather is rolling in his grave.” Eren grinned, trying to hold back the groans that Y/N was pulling from his throat as her hands smoothed over his shoulders, slipping off the coat he arrived in. And he wasted no time removing the next layer of his clothing so he now sat in front of her shirtless.
Y/N bit her lip at the sight of him. She wouldn’t be surprised if the gods themselves had modeled him out of the most pristine marble found on earth. It was almost unfair the way his muscles looked bathed in the golden light of the flickering candle on her bedside table. Her hands found the hard surface of his chest, pushing him softly so that she could flip herself on top of him.
“What are you doing?” Eren asked, as she started to fumble with the clasp of his trousers, sliding the fabric over his long legs. Her hands were cold, bringing goosebumps to his tanned skin when her fingers curled around the waistband of his undergarments.
“All this time you have been bringing me the most immense pleasure.” Y/N told him as she kissed the smooth skin of his v-line. Eren swallowed hard when her tongue darted out, for a taste of his sweet skin. “I’ve found that I’ve been selfish during our encounters.”
She tugged at the fabric, his erection springing free from its confines, the tip already leaking with the proof of his arousal. Now Y/N had never seen any other man in this intimate capacity, but she knew that any other man would pale in comparison when rivaled with Eren. Y/N licked her lips at the sight, and her tongue was begging to have a taste. Her own arousal rushing through her like a freight train.
“Y/N, you don’t have to—” His sentence was interrupted by the sharp gasp that escaped him when her lips wrapped around the head of his cock. His knuckles turned white as he gripped the sheets underneath him. The pleasure that Y/N brought him from just the touch of her lips had his chest heaving with shaky breaths, his head thrown back against the headboard.
Y/N peered up at him from her eyelashes, and felt a pang of lust at the sight of the tendons straining in his neck, his eyes twisted shut from the euphoria. A groan was pulled from his lips as she swirled her tongue against his burning skin. A groan that was cut short as she pulled off of him. His mouth opened to ask what was wrong, but soon he was speechless as Y/N pulled off the cotton dress that was hiding her figure. The rest of her garments joined her dress on the floor. And now it was his turn to admire her body under the flickering golden light.
Her skin looked as soft as velvet, her nipples were perked up against the cool air that surrounded them. His hands were itching to touch every inch of her. But before he could, her mouth returned to his cock, this time taking him deeper in her throat.
Tears pricked at the corner of her eyes. Never in her life had she ever done anything like this, but she wanted to please him the same way he did for her. Eren was quiet as she worked her tongue around his member. Y/N was slightly worried that she might be doing something wrong until his hand had found itself on the back of her head, a silent encouragement that told the girl to keep going.
A slight choking sound escaped the girl as she tried to fit as much as she could inside of her mouth. And Eren felt guilty as he felt himself twitch at the sight of her choking on his cock. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to admit how aroused he was by her innocence. It was obvious that he was the first person she had ever done this for. That thought almost had him at the edge of his orgasm. But then he felt as her throat contracted around him once more in a silent gag, and sense had come back to him.
Eren’s hands were gentle as he guided her face away from his aching erection and back towards his face. When she was in reach, he wrapped one of his arms around her waist, placing her on top of him. He could feel the slick of her arousal against his lower abdomen, more precrum spilled out of his cock at the sensation.
“Did I do something wrong?” The girl whispered, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment. And Eren quickly shook his head.
“No, darling. Not at all.” He chuckled, cupping her face in his hands to leave a chaste kiss on her lips. “But if this is your first time with a man… I want this to be about you.”
“But it’s always been about me.” Y/N pouted, smoothing her hands over his chest once more, “I want to bring you as much pleasure as you bring me.”
Eren laughed, clasping one of her hands in his own and bringing it up to his mouth to press a gentle kiss in her palm, before he said, “Believe me when I tell you that bringing you to orgasm is the greatest pleasure I have ever been subjected to.”
Y/N hid her face in her hands as more embarrassment washed over her. Her usual bold demeanor was nowhere to be seen. Eren found this side of her quite endearing, and another chuckled rumbled out of his chest as he held her close.
The two of them stayed silent for just a moment. The whole of their bodies finally connecting, skin to skin, burning against one another. Eren rubbed slow circles into the small of her back and he smiled softly as he felt her relax into him. He was just about to speak again when he was interrupted by her own voice filtering out into the night.
“All this talk about bringing me to orgasm and you have yet to do so.” Y/N mumbled into his chest. Eren threw his head back with a hearty laugh from the return of her boldness, before flipping Y/N over so that he now resided on top. Y/N responded with a squeal from the abrupt movement but soon settled under his weight, sighing into the kiss he gifted her with when she did.
“Allow me to live up to my promise then.” He groaned, rocking his hips into her once more. His cock was already nestled between her slick folds and she gasped as his shaft rubbed harshly against her clit. But then that pleasure was taken away, as he lifted himself off of her. Her mouth opened to protest, but then his fingers replaced the press of his cock, rubbing slow circles into her aching clit.
She moaned under his touch, circling her own hips in time with his fingers. Eren could feel more of his precum leak out onto her thigh as he watched her chest heave up and down with pleasure. Dipping his fingers down further, he collected her wetness, spreading it back up to her clit, applying more pressure to her sensitive bud.
Her hand snapped towards his wrist, her fingernails digging into his skin as she tried desperately to keep him there. Eren chuckled softly at her desperation, before latching his mouth around her nipple, swirling his tongue around the puckered skin. Y/N’s back arched into his tongue, her moans turning into fervid panting.
And then, the girl jerked unexpectedly when Eren pushed a finger inside of her. He went in with ease, but the shock of having something inside of her with no warning surprised her. Though her surprise quickly subsided as he began to stretch her out with only his finger. And then he added another, picking up his momentum. And just when she felt so completely filled by him, so ready to release all the tension that was building up inside of her. He took it away again.
Her eyes opened to find Eren slipping his fingers past his lips. He took the time to truly enjoy the taste of her on his fingers. She could feel her arousal drip down over her thighs as she watched him. And she was certain his hand would return to give her more, until he rolled back on top of her, returning to the position they were in before.
“Are you ready for me, darling?” Eren asked, his words faltering as the pleasure of her bare cunt against his cock made him weak. He shuddered when a particular shift in her hips had caused him to rub against her entrance, his heart was beating with anticipation.
“Yes.” Y/N breathed as Eren smoothed a palm over the backs of each of her thighs, his hands stopping at the crease of her knees. Naturally, her legs hooked over his shoulders as he pressed his body into her, his tip slowly slipping inside of her.
Eren took his time. With each deep breath the girl gave him, he slowly pushed deeper inside of her cunt. Now it was Y/N’s fingers that were twisted within the sheets as he filled her up so completely. He was practically splitting her open as his cock carved into her velvet walls, and they each let out sharp gasps when their hips finally connected.
With the position they were in now, Eren was so deep inside of her that he was certain he would be lost within her forever. Or at least he wanted to be. His jaw was clenched as he restrained himself from hammering into her, but his legs were starting to shake, his resolve slowly fading. However, he held himself still, letting Y/N adjust to his size as he left soft kisses on her supple lips.
“You can move now.” Y/N whispered after a moment of just holding him inside of her. And Eren wasn’t completely sure if he had any use of his voice box. So instead he simply nodded, slowly rolling his hips into hers.
The pace in which he was moving was the most exquisite form of torture either of them have ever experienced. Eren was strong and steady with his movements as his irises burned into her own. Y/N hooked her arms around his neck bringing him in for another impassioned kiss. With their tongues intertwined, every part of them was now forged together as one.
Eren’s mind was now preoccupied with the taste of Y/N’s lips. His hips became uncontrolled, moving at a pace that caused Y/N to gasp and moan underneath him. He pressed his forehead against hers, his own gasps leaving his lips from how tight she felt wrapped around him.
Soon the sound of his skin slapping against hers filled the room, along with the provocative squelching that came from their combined arousal. Y/N relished in every little sound— her gasps, his moans, the sounds of their bodies moving as one— knowing that Eren was the only man she’d ever want like this. Even if it was embarrassing, or unladylike, she would always want to have him in this way.
Tears pricked in her eyes once more as the ticking of the clock began to ring out in her mind. The painful reminder that this might be the only chance she’ll ever be with him like this forced its way to the forefront of her mind. She hid her face in the crook of his neck, trying hard to will away the tears that were threatening to spill over her cheeks.
But then, Eren angled his hips in a way that pressed harshly against a spot that forced a sob to leave her frame, her tears coming with it. And now here she was, sobbing uncontrollably as Eren pounded into her. It was a strange sensation, being overcome with pleasure while her tears were falling so freely. She threw her head back against the pillow as Eren continued his overpowered thrusts. But that was a mistake on her part. Because as soon as Eren caught sight of the shine of her tears against her cheeks, he had stopped his movements completely.
“You’re crying.” Eren said, not as a statement but more as an observation. His features furrowed with concern, “Did I hurt you?”
Y/N shook her head, shifting her head to the side in order to avoid Eren’s piercing gaze. But his hand had found her jaw, gently coercing her into looking at him.
“If you want to stop, just say the word.” Eren told her, his thumb brushing under her eye to wipe away the stray tear that slipped free.
“No.” She breathed, raising her head to kiss him, “No, don’t stop. I don’t want this to end.”
“Is that why you’re crying?” He whispered, now using the gentle press of his lips to rid her cheeks of the tears.
“Yes.” She said honestly, her voice barely above a timid whisper. “I feel as though I’ll lose you after this.”
“You won’t.” Eren reassured her, still holding her chin so that she could see the truth in his eyes. “I’ve told you that you own my heart. I’m a man of my word. You’ll have me for the rest of our days.”
Y/N tried to find relief in his words, tried to grasp on to the stability he was providing. But it wasn’t his loyalty that she was scared of, it was something bigger than the both of them.
“It isn’t a matter of my trust in you.” She said.
“What do you mean?”
“It’s about the people in our lives that will take me away from you.”
Eren pulled his hand away from her face, propping himself up on his arm so he could look at the entirety of her. His eyebrows furrowed as her true fear finally came to light. It was a fear that he shared. For some reason he didn’t think that it would plague her as well. Maybe he thought that his affections towards her were greater. But now as she lay under him, shaking like a leaf, his cock still buried deep inside of her while tears streamed down her face, he realized that he had a greater effect on her than he thought. And maybe that was all he needed to know.
“They don’t matter.” He blurted.
“What?”
“None of them matter.” He emphasized. “I will never let them take you away.”
“Eren.” Y/N breathed, her eyes landing on the ceiling up above. She was too scared to look him in his eye right now. Too scared to know what he truly wanted to say. “What if they do?”
Eren stayed silent. He wanted to reassure her over and over again that he will always stay by her side. Even if it was in the background of her responsibility to be the proper wife of his brother. But he didn’t know if that was the right thing to say. And it wasn’t like he could tell the future and ease her worries on the spot. So instead, he said nothing. Until Y/N’s shining eyes found him once more, in the dying light of the candle.
“Will you…” Y/N stammered, her voice strained, “Will you just stay with me? If all we have is tonight I don’t want to waste another second. So please just stay.”
“I’ll stay.” Eren whispered, allowing himself to press back into her. Y/N’s arms wound their way around his neck once more, and she kissed him with every fiber of her being. He could feel the wetness of her tears against his skin as he kissed her back.
Eren didn’t want to rush into another heated moment, he wanted to take his time and make sure she was truly okay to be in this position with him. But then Y/N started pressing into him, creating her own momentum, and soon he was rocking back into her. He could feel as her walls clenched around him, pulling a gasp from his throat as she gripped his cock.
Y/N threw her head back in another moan, and Eren took this chance to leave kisses against the exposed skin of her neck. She whimpered when he nipped at her neck with his teeth, relishing in the pain. Y/N was addicted to feeling Eren all around her like this, his lips on her skin, his arms caressing her, as well as every vein and ridge on his cock that was carving through her.
He was moving so slowly. That same tortuous pace from before. He slid the entirety of himself out, until it was just the head that resided inside of her. And just as slowly he sank all the way back in. Eren continued this, over and over, and in this position he kept constant pressure on that spot that brought Y/N closer towards insanity. The tip of him dragging across it for exquisitely painful seconds with each thrust.
She was a complete and utter mess underneath him, shuddering and gasping, and Eren could feel his dick twitch inside of her as he watched her slowly unravel. But another whine protruded past her lips as she desperately tried to roll her own hips at a faster pace.
“Please.” She begged, her breath fanning out across his ear, “I need more.”
“As you wish.” He replied, before speeding up. It was gradual, his thrusts still long and deep, but they became faster each time. Y/N laid underneath him, in pure bliss, gladly letting him have his way with her as he now pounded into her. The bed was creaking under them with each thrust. And soon they were surrounded by the sounds of their fucking.
Eren lowered his face once more, capturing Y/N’s lips as he fucked into her, his thrusts moving at an ungodly pace. He no longer had any control of his body, his movements were an enactment of his lust and need for her. The way her cunt was squeezing around him was enough to have him shaking. He could feel as his abs contracted with every thrust. Y/N was draining him of every horrible thing he had ever been through and replacing it with the greatest pleasure he had ever known.
Eventually, his dick twitched inside of her and he knew that he wouldn’t be able to hold on for much longer. Y/N squirmed as she felt his arm slip between them, sending sparks throughout her nervous system with only his touch, and then his fingers had found her clit once more. His touch was intoxicating as he smoothed circles into her, all the while still pressing up against that same spot. And before she knew what was happening, Y/N’s orgasm spilled over her. Waves of pleasure wracked over her body, shaking from the overwhelming sensation.
A string of curses left Eren’s lips as Y/N clenched around him, and he quickly pulled himself out of her before his own orgasm took control. He groaned as he came, the result splattering itself on Y/N’s stomach as she came down from her own high. Eren caught himself on his arms as he lost his strength, hovering over Y/N as they breathed heavily, their eyes not leaving one another.
Not a word was said when Y/N grabbed his face, tugging him into one final kiss, before she fell back into the mattress. Fatigue found her rather quickly, and her eyes fluttered shut, seemingly lost to the world in favor of sleep. Eren chuckled softly before rolling off of the bed, he quickly tugged his pants over his legs and then crossed the room to the dresser where he knew the extra towels resided.
Y/N could hear as he rustled around the room. She wanted to open her eyes but sleep was taking over, so she stayed silent until she felt the cold press of a wet towel against her skin. She listened as Eren hummed softly while he cleaned her skin. Warmth found her when a blanket covered her form, and when a soft kiss was pressed to her forehead, she realized she didn’t want it to end like this.
Eren was surprised when a hand shot out from under the covers, grabbing onto his wrist with a grip so tight he was surprised that she still had the strength to do so. His eyes flickered from the hand on his wrist to the girl’s face to find her eyes opened to the world once more.
“You said you would stay.” She whispered, earning a soft smile from the man. He nodded silently, before slipping under the covers, his arms wrapping around her naked form. He pulled her close to his still bare chest and then whispered into her hair.
“I’m staying.”
~
To Y/N, it seemed as though the sun was shining a little bit brighter. Along with the smile on her face as she sat next to Eren at her fiance’s pianoforte. Soft laughter filtered out into the room as they talked about anything and everything. Life seemed to be good at that moment. In fact, after the night before, life seemed like it would be good for the rest of their lives.
This morning when she woke up in Eren’s arms she had forgotten about every single one of her troubles. And it had stayed that way all day, and even now, as they fooled around with the ivory keys that sat in front of them.
“I want to hear you play.” Y/N said, scooting closer to Eren so that their shoulders were brushing against one another.
“You’ve already heard me play.” Eren laughed, his own grin practically blinding her. He nudged her shoulder with his own in a teasing manner, eliciting more giggles from the girl.
“I wasn’t listening then, I was too preoccupied by you seducing me.” She retorted, and her heart leapt as Eren threw his head back in laughter. It was moments like these when she truly recognized how handsome he was. And happiness truly did a wonder on this man’s features. Her own smile became subdued as she admired him, butterflies returning to flutter around her stomach as she did.
“If you think those are the extent of my seduction skills then you are terribly mistaken, Miss Y/L/N.” He said, as his fingers started to dance lightly across the keys, serenading their private moment with a sweet tune.
“Then I beg you, Mr. Jaeger, please show me the full extent of your prowess.” Y/N laughed, and she meant to make fun of him further, however his lips connected with hers in a kiss, effectively shutting her up. She couldn’t help but press back into him, smiling into his lips. But then as he tried to pull her closer, she quickly pulled back from his touch. Eren let out an annoyed groan from the loss of her lips.
“I’m not sure if it counts as seduction if you just go right out and kiss me.” She teased.
“That depends,” He grinned, “Is it working?”
Y/N opened her mouth to retort. But then she realized that maybe it did work. So instead, she decided it was his turn to shut up, and placed her lips back over his own. Y/N could feel how his laughter rumbled through his chest as he kissed her back. But soon their giddiness was replaced with newfound lust, as their arms snaked around each other. Their laughter was replaced by soft sighs of satisfaction and Y/N could feel as she grew desperate to have him like she did last night. But before she could even suggest it, the words were quickly stolen from her tongue as the chilling drawl of her fiance’s voice echoed out across the drawing room.
“Well, I can’t say I’m surprised.”
~~~
A/N: Ah!!! suspense!!! also they finally did it :D, so good things and bad things happen i suppose… idk how we’re gonna get out of this, but we will :)) and the next chapter will come out in time i swear!!! also heads up… next chapter is the last chapter so hold on, it’ll be a bumpy ride !!! please feel free to leave a message!
Warnings:Female masturbation, mentions of male masturbation, 18+, Minors DNI
Summary:Eren and the Reader are growing accustomed to being neighbors. This comes with the uncharted territory of finding out how thin their walls really are.
A/N: Soo, I’m sick. Which means I can’t go into work today. Which also means I’ll be sitting here bored. And I think something that will make feel better is posting chapter 2. :) I hope you enjoy!!
Chapter 2
For Eren Jaeger, there were very few things in his life that were constant. The first was his best friend, Armin, who managed to weasel into his life when they were in grade school. Armin had sort of latched onto Eren ever since he saved him from the class bully. He remembered that day clearly. He was walking home from school when he passed by an alley on the way. There was Armin, closing in on himself as the larger kid shadowed over him. Eren wasn’t that strong himself, but he had enough determination to tell the bully off. Eren was pretty sure the kid stayed away just so he wouldn’t have to deal with the nuisance that Eren was, rather than being too scared to try again. Either way Armin was grateful. After that he wouldn’t leave Eren’s side. And though it was annoying at first, Eren had come to find that he cared for the smaller blond man. Now he couldn’t imagine a life without him.
The second was his job. He was a video game developer for Titan Entertainment. One look at Eren and you wouldn’t assume that he was interested in something as nerdy as coding, but he grew up loving every detail of what went into video games. Soon enough, he went to university with a major in software engineering and now he had a job where he loved what he was doing. That’s all that really mattered to the man. Since he didn’t waste any of his time on doing anything that he wasn’t even remotely interested in.
That seemed to be the extent of what was constant in his life. Every other aspect of his life was erratic to say the least. Eren didn’t have ‘the usual’ at any coffee shop. He never read the same book twice. He always found himself in foreign places around the city every night. He even had a different woman lying in his bed every other morning after venturing to those new places. Eren liked to think of himself as a nomad. Traveling constantly and never settling down. Taking what he needed and leaving behind what he didn’t. He never stayed past the agreed upon lease at any apartment he had lived in. Hence why he was in this new apartment.
Though with this new apartment, he sensed that his usual way of life was being threatened. As the days passed he realized that there was a brand new constant that kept popping up. Ever since their encounter at the parking spot he had been running into Y/N every single day.
As it turns out, the two of them arrived home from work at the exact same time. He wondered why this didn’t happen during the week when he first moved in, but then he realized he was working overtime that week since his company was finishing up their newest video game for its release that was coming up in a few days. Now that he was back on his usual work schedule, it felt like the only person he ran into these days was Y/N.
One would think that this abrupt contradiction to his need for inconsistencies would bother him. Hell, even he thought that her constant presence would be an annoyance. But for some reason it didn’t. Maybe it was because the girl intrigued him. He never thought he would meet anyone who would have such a strong vendetta against him. Especially one that started over a parking spot. And here she was, in all her glory, and he had found that it was quite fun messing with her. It was like someone had placed a large red button in front of him, telling him not to press it, knowing damn well that he wouldn’t be able to hold himself back.
“Well look who it is.” Eren heard himself say as soon as he turned off the engine to his motorcycle. He pulled off his helmet, watching as the girl stood up after chaining the back wheel of her moped. “Fancy seeing you here, Kid.”
“Are you going to say that every time?” She rolled her eyes, slinging her camera bag over her shoulder.
“As long as I keep getting that warm welcome from you, consider it done.” Eren grinned as he swung his leg over his bike and followed her towards the building, holding his helmet underneath his arm.
“I thought you said I wouldn’t be seeing you around.” Y/N pointed out, as she opened the glass door that led into the lobby. Eren placed his hand on it to hold it open as she moved inside.
“And I thought you said you were planning on never speaking to me again, and yet, here we are.” Eren retorted.
“Touché.” Y/N breathed, pressing the button to the elevator. Their words died in the air between them and they were silent for just a moment. Eren took this time to study the girl. She was far prettier than she probably knew. Though, of course, he noticed that from the moment he met her. It was hard for him not to notice how attractive a woman is. Especially when that woman hated him from the moment she met him. God, he felt like a cliché. The one time a woman doesn’t fall at his feet and suddenly he’s too curious about her for his own good. Though this couldn’t have been genuine interest. He was just amused by her hatred for him. This meant nothing… right?
But then he thought, since when had he cared about the people who lived in his building? Out of all the places he lived, he had never tried to get close to anyone since he knew it was only temporary. So, why was it so different now?
“Take a picture, it will last longer.” The girl recited, effectively pulling Eren out of his thoughts. She looked over at Eren, catching him in the act of staring her down. He quickly averted his gaze, facing the elevator doors as they finally opened.
“Hey, don’t mind me, Kid, I’m just trying to get to know my neighbor.” Eren said in an effort to save himself, as they both stepped into the elevator. Which seemed to work, since he noticed that Y/N rolled her eyes, the tell tale sign that she was annoyed by his actions, proving that this particular one was believable.
“Well, I’m starting to think that I know a little bit too much about you.” Y/N said, which confused Eren, as they hadn’t had a conversation that was any deeper than small talk.
For the past couple of weeks, Y/N had noticed that Eren was quite the busy man. To her dismay, she had realized that they not only shared a parking space, but they also, in fact, shared a wall. Which was only proven to her when she heard the unmistakable sound of moans filtering through the thin walls of her apartment.
It’s not like Y/N was a prude when it came to sex. She had a fair share of partners within her life. But she had never met anyonewho had been so… vocal, when it came to such an intimate experience. She herself had only let herself get so loud when she knew no one else could hear her except for the person she was with. So, it was jarring for her to hear the obvious sounds of sex coming from the other side of the room.
At first, she had thought that Eren had a girlfriend. But as they continued living as neighbors, she noticed that it was a new woman everyday, who was leaving his apartment. She didn’t know if that fact was relieving or not. But she also wondered why she cared at all. It’s not like she was interested in him or anything. He was just noticeable. Mainly because he seemed like the type of man that wanted to be noticed. And unfortunately for her, he was getting what he wanted. How couldn’t she notice when he made the women he was with sound like that.Y/N shook her head, trying to rid the thought of how good he was in bed. She registered how his features twisted with confusion.
“Did you know we share a wall?” Was all she said for an explanation, as she pressed the button for their floor. Eren’s eyes widened with realization.
“Apparently, I didn’t.” He responded. His eyes roamed over the figure of the girl beside him. From her body language he could tell that she was shy about the idea of him having sex on the other side of the wall. The thought that she was so innocent caused his stomach to churn with something unexpected. For some reason he found that this side of her was… endearing.
“Well, I hope you enjoy the show.” Eren said next. He didn’t really know why he said it. All he knew was that it would get her riled up. And apparently, he liked her when she was riled up.
“It’s not so much about meenjoying it.” Y/N said, and she didn’t have to explain the rest of her thought. Eren knew what she was alluding to. It’s as if she were daring him. Daring him to admit that he liked to be heard. That he liked to be known. Known by her. Eren looked over at her, slightly surprised that she was that bold. The way she held his stare surprised him too. He opened his mouth to send back a retort but he couldn’t find the words. Y/N took this as her cue to continue.
“Will you just keep it down? Some of us like to sleep.” She muttered, finally breaking eye contact with the man. This seemed to unfreeze him from his stupor.
“What a waste of time.” He joked, and Y/N just shook her head, unamused.
The two of them finally made it to their floor, no other words were exchanged as they journeyed down the hall to their respective apartments. His eyes followed her figure as she stopped in front of her door. Eren watched as she procured her keys from her bag, the soft jingle of metal pulled him back to reality, as he realized that he was observing her once more.
He wasn’t sure what had gotten into him, or why this girl was so interesting to him, especially when she annoyed him like no other. How many times was she going to complain about something he did? Here he was just trying to live his life and she always had something to say. But at the same time, why did he even care? Eren knew nothing about this girl. So why was he so preoccupied by what she thought of him?
Annoyance pierced through Eren’s chest as he unlocked his own door. He wasn’t sure if it was towards Y/N or himself. Maybe both. Without saying anything more to the girl that lived in the apartment next to his, he moved inside, tossing his keys in the bowl that sat on a side table next to his door. As he moved deeper into his apartment, he told himself that this was the last time where he let his thoughts wander to Y/N. She was nobody to him. He wouldn’t waste any more time on her. Eren was reassured by his promise to himself. He knew that he could go about his day, and not have to worry about the girl next door.
~
Meanwhile, Y/N was sitting at her kitchen counter. Her laptop now opened in front of her as she scrolled through the pictures that she had taken earlier this evening. Mikasa, thank god, had a successful meeting with Nanaba, and her pitch was accepted. When the writer had asked Y/N to be the photographer for her piece, Y/N was elated. How could she say no when her friend had worked so hard on this article. And now, after the interviews and photoshoots were finished, all they had to do was polish everything up.
Diving into her work, Y/N noticed that she had spent very little time worrying about her new neighbor. The only times she did think of him, was when she ran into him in the parking lot. Which… now that she thought about it, happened to be everyday. But, that really didn’t matter because as soon as she was behind her door she was back in her own little world. That was until the noises of his… endeavors would bleed through the thin walls of her room. Thus forcing his way into even the private parts of her life. It was suffocating.
Sure, it didn’t happen as often as one would consider a nuisance. But it was enough to annoy the living daylights out of her. If it were anyone else, she would turn a blind eye. Who was she to get involved into someone else’s personal life? But with Eren? For some reason it felt personal. It felt like he was trying to get a rise out of her. And maybe she was just making it up in her head, but the smirk that he gave her every time they met told her otherwise. He liked pushing her buttons, she could tell. It was only in her own determination, that kept her reactions to a minimum. Y/N didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of her obvious annoyance with him.
Thankfully, Eren was particularly quiet this afternoon. As she worked on her editing, there were little to no disturbances. Y/N was back to her normal, everyday routine without having to worry about anything other than herself. And it was all that she could have hoped for after the stressful work day she had been through.
Currently, warm water ran gentle streams down her figure as her troubles washed away through the drain. A sigh left her lips as her fingers tangled themselves in the rough mesh of her loofah, scrubbing her skin raw to cleanse herself free from her tension. Her head was empty as the soap formed bubbles at her feet. This was exactly what she needed to relax herself. She was in a state of eternal bliss when she finally exited the shower, as if she were on top of a cloud that carried her to the comfort of her bed. Before she dived into the covers that would eventually coerce her into peaceful slumber, she slipped into her usual pajamas of an oversized t-shirt.
When Y/N’s head rested on her silk pillowcase, a soft smile graced her lips. Finally, the day was over. Her tired eyelids fluttered to a close, hiding the iris of her eyes. The world around her started to fade away as sleep took over her form. She could practically see the sheep that jumped over her head. But then, her eyes shot open at the unmistakable sound of Eren through the walls.
“Fuck.”She heard him say, in a tone that was definitely notinnocent. Her hypothesis was proven right as moans quickly followed after the curse word.
Again?Y/N thought to herself as an annoyed groan left her lips. She turned over, moving deeper under her covers, grabbing a pillow to press against the ear that wasn’t pressed against the bed. She was hoping to protect herself from the inconvenience by blocking out the noise. But alas, it was to no avail, his moans were growing louder and louder. Honestly, how horny was this man that he had to do this almost every night?
At this point, Y/N was over it. Why should she let him get away with disturbing her peace? Before she knew it, her determination and anger had caused her to kick the blankets away from herself. Her feet were practically moving on their own as they brought her through her living room, out of her front door and into the hallway. She finally registered what she was doing when she placed herself in front of his front door. But by that point it was too late, her knuckles had already connected with his door with three sharp knocks.
She thought that she could get away with only that. She could go back to her apartment and hide herself there until he stopped what he was doing. Surely, he was too distracted to hear her knocking at his door at midnight and she wouldn’t have to be confronted with the sight of him, mid-coitus. Y/N turned, thinking that she could leave without having to deal with the consequences of her annoyance finally getting to her. But as she did the door swung open.
Her eyes widened at the sight of him. He was shirtless. Y/N gulped as her eyes wandered the surface of his chiseled upper body, it was glistening with sweat that was obviously there due to his exerted energy. His gray sweats hung low on his hips, accentuating the deep v-line that directed towards his—
Y/N’s eyes snapped up to his face, his attractive features twisted with annoyance, clearly bothered by her presence.
“Can I help you?” He asked, leaning against his door frame, crossing his muscular forearms across his chest. Y/N straightened her back, determined not to get distracted by his stupid good looks. Since she was already here, standing at his door, might as well get what she wanted.
“Did you forget that we shared a wall? Or do my sentences just go one ear and out the other?” Y/N asked, crossing her own arms. Eren stifled a laugh at her disgruntled expression. She was kind of cute when she was angry… The man shook the thought from his mind. No way did he just call her cute when she was disrupting his night. Eren hardened his features as he tried to register what she was saying.
“I’m sorry… What are you talking about?” He finally responded, needing more clarification to what she was complaining about this time.
“Look, I’m glad you’re getting some, I’m sure the stress relief makes you far less of an asshole than you already are.” She told him, and Eren’s mouth quirked up into an amused half-smile at the mention of sex. “But will you and whatever girl you’re with this time, pleasekeep it down, I’ve had a hard enough day as it is without you ruining my sleep.”
Eren tilted his head as he mulled over her words. ‘The girl you’re with’ is what she had said. Which was terribly funny, taking into account that he wasn’t with a girl since he wastrying to be considerate about what she had said earlier. Though without his usual hook-up for the evening he was in desperate need of some release, so he had settled for his hand for the night. Eren had found it quite interesting that she was that in tune with the sounds of his pleasure. In fact, it excited him a little. And since sex was currently on his mind, due to the fact that his cock was in the palm of his hand literally a minute ago, his horniness distracted him from his annoyance. And it wasn’t helping that Y/N was clad in only a gray t-shirt with the emblem of what was most likely the university she graduated from, the soft skin of her thighs on full display.
“Okay, I’ll keep it down.” Eren nodded, and Y/N let out a breath of relief, thinking that this conversation was finally over. But he wouldn’t let her get away. It seemed like she had forgotten. Big. Red. Button. Eren was going to push it. “But, I’ll have you know that there isn’t anybody with me.”
Y/N had begun to turn back to her door, but his words had instantly ceased all movement in her body. He was creating all that noise by himself?Y/N swallowed at the lump that was forming in her throat. Her skin was heating up at the mention of what he did during his own time, but she couldn’t let him get to her. She turned to face him to find a mischievous smirk playing across his features. Realization hit Y/N at that moment, he was trying to tease her. Annoyance caused her to grit her teeth, mostly at herself, since she couldn’t let him have the last word. She willed herself to stop her mouth from moving, but nevertheless Eren got his way, earning a reaction from the girl.
“Off your game, Jaeger?” She asked, calling him by the last name she had inadvertently learned throughout their time of knowing each other. She inwardly cursed at herself for not thinking of anything more clever than that, as Eren’s smirk still stayed plastered on his face.
“Nope,” He said, simply, popping the ‘p’. He rested his head against the door frame, his eyelids hooded as he looked down at her. Y/N felt vulnerable under his gaze. “I just found something new to… pique my interests.”
It was almost immediate, her reaction to his words. It was as if her whole body had erupted into flames right then and there in that hallway. And Eren obviously took notice of this as his grin grew wider. Y/N’s cheeks were flushed from her embarrassment, she crossed her arms over her chest as if Eren had x-ray eyes and could see right through her. Which he wouldn’t even need since her reaction to his words revealed everything she was thinking. The worst part was, he didn’t even say specifically if he meant her. But it almost felt like he did. And now he had irrevocably made her a fool. Y/N hated how good at this he was.
She scowled up at his amused features, “Can you please just be quiet? I’d like to get some sleep without you triggering my gag reflex.”
“Mm, now that’s a thought that’ll keep me going.” Eren responded slyly. His tone of voice was husky and Y/N scoffed at his innuendo.
“Whatever.” She retorted, turning back towards her apartment. “I’m going to bed.”
“Sweet dreams, Kid.” Was the last thing she heard before her door was fully shut behind her, making Eren triumphant in having the last word.
~
Y/N’s hands immediately found her cheeks in an effort to subside the heat that had rushed to her face. Her back was flush up against her front door as she tried to control her breathing, and she was pissed that Eren had this effect on her. The girl slapped at her cheeks, hoping that the self-inflicted pain would replace the creeping feeling of her own arousal. She didn’t want to let this man affect the inner-workings of her vagina. So she ignored the ache that had presented itself the moment she saw Eren in all of his half-naked, sweaty glory, and proceeded back to her bedroom.
Her blankets welcomed her with the warmth that her body had left behind. She sank further into her bed, trying to conjure up the pure innocent image of sheep that had almost drifted her off into dreamland earlier that night. But as she clenched her eyes shut, the soft cream-color of their wool had morphed and shifted into the blinding white of Eren’s teasing grin. And that came attached with the body that was leaning against his door frame. And in the quiet solitude of her mind she couldn’t help but allow herself to recall the sight of him in his sweats. The deep V that pointed directly to his cock that was still slightly hardened from the actions he was committing against himself.
Y/N could hardly believe that he opened the door in that state. But somewhere in the pit of the stomach she was grateful for the image. Another fact she could hardly believe. However, even if she didn’t believe it, that didn’t stop the way her thighs were slowly starting to rub against one another, the sheets soft against her skin as they contorted with the movement of her body. She rolled over onto her stomach, hugging her pillow underneath her head, willing her body to stop moving.
But this new position had offered her something firm underneath her, and subconsciously her hips started rolling against the surface of her mattress. A sigh left her lips at the delicious new form of friction. And with her own aural confirmation to her pleasure, it finally hit her what she was doing. She parted her legs, hoping that would stop her from squeezing her thighs together. But that only made the slick in her panties more obvious as the cool night air hit her center. And the space that now resided between her legs left room for imagination. A spot where someone could fit so perfectly. Where Erencould fit so perfectly.
Eren.
Eren!?
And at the exact same moment, as if he knew that her thoughts would always lead to him, another soft moan seeped its way through her paper thin walls. A whimper soon followed and that instantly brought forth an ache of arousal that shot through her whole entire body like electricity. A shuddering breath escaped her lips as Eren so clearly ignored her pleas to stay quiet and his moans grew louder. But now… now that Y/N knew that he was alone. That he was whimpering and begging for the touch of his very own hand, the night had taken a very drastic turn for the girl.
Images of Eren in his bed shoved its way to the forefront of her mind. She pictured him, with his back against their shared wall, mere inches away from Y/N, with his hand wrapped firmly around his dripping cock. He was probably moving at a slow and steady pace, teasing himself because he seemed like the type of man to take his time and to relish in all of the pleasure he was giving himself.
A dull thud could be heard against the plaster, and immediately the thought of Eren with his head thrown back on the wall behind him had found the girl. It was like she was watching him right now, she could see how his adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he finally moved at a faster pace, his precum leaking out over his fingers as he did. More curses escaped past his lips and Y/N was now squirming in her sheets. Her own hand slowly carving between the mattress and her stomach, moving closer and closer to where she needed it.
Her hand was inching downwards at a snail’s pace, her mind clouded with arousal, but also with the moral dilemma of masturbating to the sounds of her neighbor doing the same. It felt wrong, so wrong to the point where it was exciting. And the feel of her own hand burning through the fabric of her t-shirt was slowly releasing all of her inhibitions. Her tribulations subsided the moment her fingertips dipped beneath the elastic band of her panties. And at that point there was no stopping what she was about to commit.
Almost immediately her hand had found her aching clit and a small whimper left her form from the icy touch of her own fingers. The contrast between the coolness of her digits and the heat of her arousal brought forth a strange sense of satisfaction as she began to rub slow circles into the bundle of nerves. Finally touching herself felt like a dam breaking as sexual gratification took over her form.
She dipped her fingers even lower, being met with her wetness that had been accumulating this whole time. A gasp of surprise had rippled through her, because never in her life had she ever been this wet. It was like dipping her fingers into melting wax, it poured over the entirety of her fingers and when she brought it back up to her clit, she had to hold back the moan that was trying to force its way out of her throat. She wouldn’t let it. She didn’t want to give Eren the satisfaction.
Right now she was only concerned with her own pleasure as she started to grind against her hand. Her hips were moving at an eager pace that would be embarrassing if anyone ever saw her in this state of desperation. But then the man on the other side of the wall let out another harsh curse, and she thought of how it would feel to be under his gaze right now.
In the deepest, darkest corner of her mind she conjured up the image of him, not on his own bed, but standing in the doorway of her room. His eyes would most likely be darkened with lust. He would watch how she fucked herself with her own fingers. He would probably look at her with that stupid fucking teasing smirk of his, and then say something cocky. But instead of annoying Y/N like it usually would, it would bring forth a surge of excitement.
Because she knew that after he spoke his words, he would cross that room at a tortuously slow pace. He would crawl over her form until his front was flush against her back. She arched up into nothingness, but somehow her imagination was so vivid she could practically feel his hard cock pressed into her ass. And then it would be his own hand traveling between her body and the mattress, and it would be his fingers that replaced her own, rubbing tantalizing circles on her clit. He would grind his erection against her ass, he would leave searing kisses on the back of her neck. The thought had her edging closer and closer to her sweet release—
Another loud and forceful moan filtered its way into her room, forcing Y/N’s daydream away. This time it was louder and more provocative than before, and Y/N was certain that Eren was cumming. His moans were more desperate.
The interruption of her daydream did nothing to stop her pleasure. Instead, knowing that he was in that room— his bare chest probably covered in his own cum, had the girl tipping over the edge. Her legs started to shake as her own orgasm rolled through her. She felt as her own release pooled in her panties, effectively ruining them since she forgot to remove them in her haste. Heavy breaths filtered through her nose as she bit down on her pillow, trying hard not to let her moans escape.
And as she slowly came down from her high, she wondered what Eren was thinking of when he finally came. Probably one of the many conquests he brought home. The girl felt foolish that she just came at the sound of his pleasure, when she probably didn’t even cross his mind.
Little did she know, on the other side of the wall, as Eren wiped his cum from his chest with a discarded t-shirt, his mind was reeling from the fact that he just came because of the conjured up image of him fucking the girl next door.
~~~
A/N: So obviously this escalated really quickly… let’s see how they both handle this new underlying factor to their relationship ;). I hope you enjoyed! And as always please feel free to message me :)
Genre: War AU, Angst, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn
Summary: Would you love someone if your days are numbered? A tragic love story between a soldier who’s trying to find a purpose in life and a blind girl who is stripped away of her freedom.
Content Warnings: Graphic description of death and murder, sexual assault on women, oppression, physical abuse, alcohol consumption, swearing.
A twenty-one-year-old boy, with eyes greener than the forest under the blazing sun, choked on his alcohol. It was his fifth time drinking one, but he never did it out of his own desire. Being a new soldier in the Marleyan army meant that he had to obey what his seniors ordered him to do. Whether it was to lay his weapon on his shoulder and chug on a bottle of vodka during duty, or behead a prisoner and watch their blood drenching the snow. The young soldier never had an option.
A soldier should not ask questions even when they are dying from curiosity. He had learned it the hard way during training. That was why he always pretended like he understood—andaccepted—everything that was happening around him. That was just how the world naturally worked. The world was cruel. There was no beauty in it. Only those who had tossed away their hearts and conscience could survive. Have a heart and you’ll die before the next sunrise, that was what he was taught during his first month of service.
The dark brown-haired boy, known by the name Eren Kruger, rubbed his nape. He had his shoulder-length hair cut short ever since he joined the army, giving him a fresh undercut look that failed to protect his nape from the winter breeze. His skin was sun-kissed but crimson still painted the tips of his ears, a sign that his body was sensitive to cold, even when he was dressed warmly in a thick beige coat—a Marleyan uniform that he wore with a proud look on his face and shame in his chest. Kruger was not his real surname but it was the name he had to get familiar with.
Eren was one of the latest additions to the Marleyan army that “protected” their neighbor country, Eldian. At least, that was how he was told anyway. Deep down inside, he always had a different belief of his own. Marley wasn’t protecting the Eldians from other countries that wanted its minerals and natural resources. Marley was monopolizing Paradis and made it its slave for their benefit. But Eren knew better not to speak his thoughts aloud. He still valued his life too much, no matter how meaningless his life felt to him at the moment.
But then again, why must his life matter when people around him were dying just because they tried to find their sanctuaries? Why must he fill his life with laughter when children were getting beaten to the ground, their heads smashed under combat boots, just because they asked for more bread?
The world was unfair, and Eren used to be scared of hell. But this… This life he was living at the moment… It already tasted like one.
“Excuse me?” Eren tried to keep his voice down. Being in the middle of the winter season was already enough reason for his cheeks to bloom in the color of the evening sky. He did not need the older man to make him look even more flustered.
“I’m asking you, kid.” A man who was in his late thirties scratched the untrimmed beard on his chin. His name was Theo Magath, a strict commander of Eren’s division. Although he was nine centimeters shorter than the younger soldier, Magath was stronger and more experienced in every way. Eren feared him the most, though the other man regarded him as his new companion on battlefields. “Have you ever slept with a girl before?”
“Permission to speak freely, Sir?”
“Permission granted.”
Eren still hesitated, teeth nibbling against the inside of his cheeks. “Forgive me if I’m rude, but,” he cautiously spoke as he bowed down a little and returned the bottle to the older man. “I believe you’ve drunk too much of this.”
“And you’ve drunk too little,” the man said, his laugh boisterous when he pushed the alcohol to Eren’s chest. “Go drink up a little more.”
“But we’re on duty.”
“Yeah, to watch a bunch of teenagers collects those damn branches from the wood,” Magath scoffed. “I doubt they’re gonna start up a revolution any moment from now, so drink.”
“Sir—”
“Drink.”
The way mirth in his voice suddenly vanished almost sent shivers down his spine. Eren nodded, taking another sip. He knew his tolerance limit and he wouldn’t pass it. He only swallowed the liquid to be polite and perhaps, just to keep himself warm. He didn’t intend to be drunk like the older soldier.
“I haven’t,” Eren admitted with a quiet voice. “I haven’t… done it with anyone.”
“Thought so.” Magath chuckled. “When’s your birthday?”
“March thirtieth.”
“It’s still a couple of months from now, huh?” The man yawned loudly, and puffs of warm breaths appeared in the cold air. “Hey, why don’t we celebrate early? I’ll get you the best girl from our place. You can take a few hours off and have fun with her. Think of it as a birthday present from me.”
That place, Eren knew, was referring to the military brothel that was stationed at their campsite. On some nights, those girls came to visit their barracks and perform their duties as the Comfort Women to satisfy the soldiers’ needs. And any other times, officers would stand properly in line, waiting to enter one of the twenty rooms in the brothel to satisfy their sexual desire.
It was always physical, nothing more and nothing less. They were used as toys—objects to fill the men’s thirsts. They were not prostitutes; they were forced to become one. Those young girls were kidnapped from the streets or, more often, deceived by the Marleyan government that they would get a better future if they worked for them. They ended up working as sex slaves—each person serving about a hundred military personnel per month, and if they weren’t cooperative, they would get beaten to death.
Their bodies belonged to the army, raped and tortured.
Eren never came to visit that place. He hated it with all his heart, every nerve of his body shouting in disgust. And whenever those women came to their barracks, he would leave with his shotgun strapped to his back, disappearing into the woods. He preferred spending the night sorting out his thoughts near the frozen lake than forcing himself on some lady he didn’t know. Even the thought of it made him nauseous. It was wrong. Those women never deserved to be treated that way, but Eren was weak and powerless. There was nothing he could do.
“No, thank you,” Eren declined, feeling agitated all of a sudden. “I’m fine.”
“What, do you prefer men?”
“No, Sir. I just…” The boy took a deep breath, calming himself down and trying to sound less offensive. He put a lot of effort into not saying things like ‘I don’t want to commit more sins than I already have done’ or ‘it stands against my values to rape women, unlike you and the rest of immoral idiots here’. After a few seconds of battling inside his head, he decided to utter, “I just don’t feel like it.”
It was safe. It was simple. It was a lie.
“You don’t feel like having sex?” Magath snorted, repulsed by the thought. “The fuck is wrong with you?”
It burned bright, the rage inside his chest. “I just don’t feel like raping someone, Sir.” Not until his sentence ended, did Eren realize that he was almost growling at the older man. His heart plummeted to his stomach. Immediately, he stood in front of his superior, performing a ninety-degree bow. “My deepest apologies, Commander! I was out of line! I will take any kind of punishment for my words!”
Something glinted in the older man’s eyes, but whatever it was, he decided to ignore it. “It’s fine,” Magath said and Eren bowed once more before he scooted back to his position. His heart was thumping loud behind his rib cages.
The boy straightened his back and kept his eyes once more on a group of young Eldians, walking in line carrying twigs in their arms. Their jackets were much thinner if being compared to his, tattered with plenty of holes in them. And when Eren wore a warm, fur hat to protect his hair from snowflakes, they had none. The young soldier felt sorry for them, but it seemed like he was the only one with empathy in this place.
There was a little boy, with cheeks red and scratched by the falling snow, struggling to keep his wobbly feet on the ground. He was carrying more branches than his little arms could handle. The weight was too much and the snow was too deep for him to walk on and he fell, his face hitting piles of ice. The twigs he carried scattered everywhere. He was frustrated but he didn’t cry. Eren was amazed.
But then a soldier came over, slamming the end of his gun to the little boy’s head and screaming at him to get up. He hit him again, and again, and again until Eren could see the tear on his skin, fresh blood dripping down from the side of his temple.
Eren’s hold on his gun tightened.
“Careful, kid,” Magath reminded him, his voice as eerie as the night during an eclipse. Eren shuddered, but not from the cold. “You’re a kind young man, I know that much. But your kind values are the ones that are going to get you killed someday.”
Eren turned his head to look at the man, his eyes weren’t blinking. “Sir…?”
“Listen to me.” Magath locked his eyes with the soldier and Eren felt like he was being choked instead. “These Eldian people are vicious. That little boy you see there may look hopeless now, but he was ready to stab Galliard’s neck with a fork just to get more food less than a week ago. And women, especially, are even more dangerous. They betray us. They won’t hesitate to kill us in our sleep. We can’t trust them, Eren.”
Eren stayed still, though his mind was screaming: but we’re not that better either.
“They don’t deserve to be treated like people,” Magath continued, “Treat them like toys. You don’t share feelings with toys, do you? You play with them.”
Eren swallowed, his throat felt like it was made of sand. “And what do I do when I get bored with them, Sir?” the boy asked because that was what the man wanted to hear. Theo Magath didn’t want to witness kindness, sincerity, or mercy. He, just like any other soldiers here, craved power, grief, and lust.
Magath smiled, his eyes shimmering like a proud father’s.
“Then, it’s time to throw them away.”
***
Eren jolted awake when he heard a man screaming. He didn’t realize that he had fallen asleep for a few seconds on his feet, swallowed by the boredom of seeing the constant movements of young men collecting dry branches to build campfires that night. His head spun toward the source, his chest tightening at the sight. There, a few meters away from him, stood a very tall, well-built Marleyan soldier with short, coarse-looking dark hair that reached to his neck. A thin beard decorated his jawline, his smirk was nothing but menacing. His name was Kenny Ackerman.
He loomed tall as he beat a young man—who was probably around Eren’s age—to the cold, freezing ground. The branches fell out of the boy’s arms, meeting the earth almost without a sound. A splotch of blood spilled from his mouth when Kenny landed a harsh kick on his stomach, painting the snow like angry lipstick smeared on a blank canvas. His light ash-brown hair was falling over his eyes, concealing them.
Kenny Ackerman was his senior, but even if he weren’t, Eren still wouldn’t dare to stop him. That man was twice his size, with arms strong enough to break his wrists in seconds. Eren’s mind was telling him to not lift a muscle—that if he tried to stop the older man from beating the boy to death, he would meet his end that day as well. But his heart was thumping loud, sending a rush of adrenaline to course through his veins. He was old enough to know better, but his body was filled with young blood. Before he knew it, Eren made a step forward. It was probably his luck when another male appeared, kneeling in front of the soldier to beg for forgiveness.
It was another Eldian, as old as Eren was but seemed five times younger in appearance. He had a mop of golden hair, his body was frail and not as tall as the boy he was protecting. For a split second, Eren caught a glimmer of his irises. They were cerulean, as deep as the bottomless sea, as bright as the cloudless sky.
“Please let me explain,”hepleaded with two hands surrendering in the air, beseeching for mercy. “It was just a misunderstanding. My brother meant no harm.”
But Kenny Ackerman was not known for being kind. He was famous for being ruthless, the death reaper of the army who enjoyed robbing the light of his victim’s eyes. While Eren had never taken a life before—be it the Eldians or Marleyan soldiers who assaulted him by pushing him down into a frozen lake in the middle of the night—Kenny had killed hundreds. Eren knew that for a fact, because for every kill he did, that man carved a line on his barrack’s wall. The lines had become so many that Eren couldn’t see the original color of the wall anymore.
Kenny grasped the blonde-haired boy by his neck, lifting his hand until his feet could no longer touch the ground. His blue eyes started to water, croaking in pain as his fingers clawed frantically against the soldier’s wrist.
“That fucking brat tried to take a sip of my coffee,” Kenny bellowed, nudging his head to the other Eldian who was lying on the ground, his blood pooling in his mouth. “You think I can forgive him just like that?”
The boy coughed, pale skin turning scarlet as he was smothered by his large hand. His feet erratically moved in the air, trying to find a ground to stand on while his lungs were screaming for air. He was choking, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. A few seconds more and it would be over. A few seconds more then his blue eyes wouldn’t glimmer as radiantly. They would be dark. Hollow. Dead.
But Kenny had a change of heart. Instead of murdering him, the violent man tossed him back to the ground.
“Armin…” The other boy—the Eldian who Armin tried to protect so desperately—called, reaching out a hand to touch his brother who was gasping loudly. Eren felt a shiver running through his spine when he heard him speak in his Eldian language. It was clear that the Marleyan government had declared that all Eldians should abandon their mother tongue. They were only allowed to speak in Marleyan or to not speak at all. Break this rule and you would be starved for two days. Do it again and you’d have your tongue cut off. Hearing how he just spoke to his brother in his native language, Eren thought of two things: it was either he was rebelling or just plain stupid.
Surely, that word had consequences. Eren wasn’t surprised when the Eldian boy received another blow to his stomach.
What he didn’t expect, however, was when Armin slapped his hand away. “Jean!” he screamed. “Know your place!”
Jean looked like he stopped breathing for a second. So many things appeared in his eyes: from being confused to afraid until it finally ended with redeemed anger. Slowly, and painfully, Jean crawled to his stomach and pressed his forehead to the ground, bowing to his punisher.
“I’m sorry,” Jean muttered, his voice quavering and Eren knew that it wasn’t from the fear. It was from the wrath he tried to bottle inside his chest. Eren also noticed that tears were lining down his cheeks, but his sobs couldn’t be heard, muted by his gritted teeth. It was an agonizing sight to behold.
Armin kneeled next to him, imitating his posture, bowing deeply until his forehead met the ground. “Please, Sir… Show us some mercy…”
Kenny guffawed, looking delighted for the power he had over them. He placed one foot on Jean’s head, pressing it down until he screamed when the skin on his forehead broke and bled. “I can’t hear you, little boy,” the soldier said, his smile growing wider. “Come on, apologize some more. I’m sure even pigs like you can do it.”
Eren felt his heart stir. His hold around his shotgun was getting tighter, his nails turning white.
Panic painted Armin’s face as he watched Jean’s blood seeping through the snow. “S-sir,” he crawled forward, latching one hand against Kenny’s boots. “Let him go—"
“Don’t touch me!” Kenny kicked his face and Armin fell to his side, shaky hands covering his torn lip.
“I’m sorry!” Jean, unable to contain the agony, screamed. “I said I’m sorry, so please!” He sobbed, his face sinking in the snow. “Please let us go…”
Kenny released him with a satisfied grin. “Listen to your big brother, little boy,” he said, spitting on Jean’s limp body. “Know your place.” He took his leave with his chin tilted up in arrogance.
The ruckus ended there. The two boys were still lying helplessly on the ground, trying to catch their breaths and steady their hearts. The crowd around them—another bunch of powerless Eldians—tried to not pay attention to them even when their hands were itching to help. They continued walking with their heads hung low, hugging the branches close to their chest like they were ordered to before the sun sank below the horizon.
Eren felt sick. Everything was wrong. The world was not supposed to roll like this. It wasn’t supposed to resemble hell.
The young soldier walked with hurried steps toward the boys. He was the only one who was brave enough to examine their conditions. Jean, head raised in suspicion, scowled at him when he was close enough. He was like a cornered wolf, a raging flame in his eyes even his whole body was aching. Eren did not mind his anger. He had expected it.
Armin, on the other hand, was simply cautious. “Sir.” He bowed to Eren as he did to Kenny before, with his palms and forehead pressed against the ice. His voice was still quivering, his shoulders shaking both from pain and fear.
“Stand up,” Eren commanded, not too loud, not too firm. “Stand up and hide before the others come to check on you.”
Armin lifted his head, gazing at him with confusion in his eyes. “But…” His gaze shifted to the pile of branches that were scattered on the ground. “T-the branches—I haven’t finished—”
“I’ll tell them you’re done for the day.” He picked the other man up by his arm. “What’s your name?”
Armin tucked his chin down, anxious. “A-Armin Arlert, Sir…”
Eren took an old handkerchief from his pocket—one that his mother gave him during his departure—and handed it to the boy. “Here.”
The shorter boy blinked in bewilderment, perhaps contemplating whether Eren was just playing tricks on him. “S-sir?”
“To wipe your blood,” Eren explained, observing the deep cut on the corner of his mouth. “Don’t use your clothes, you’ll get germs on the wound.”
Armin’s shaky eyes searched his, wanting to decipher what was hidden between them but Eren kept his face guarded. “Y-yes, Sir, thank you…”
“I assume that’s your brother?”
Armin helped Jean return to his feet. “Yes. His name is Jean.”
“All right.” Eren tried to put on a reassuring smile. It was so rare to see a Marleyan soldier smile in such a benign way that it left the two boys stunned. “Armin, I want you to pick up your brother and find someplace safe to spend the night. There’s a lake two kilometers away from here. Keep walking south and you’ll find it. It’s safe, I’m the only one who knows that place. No one will find us over there. Sneak out an hour before dawn. There are fewer guards during that time. I’ll bring you guys some food.”
Jean, who was not as kind and trusting as his brother was, sent him a vicious glare. “Why should we trust you?” he bitterly asked. “Why should we believe that this isn’t just a sick plan of yours to get us killed?”
“Jean,” Armin called, his tone demanding silence from the other man. “Behave.”
“Because if I really wanted to kill you,” Eren replied. “You’d be dead by now.”
Jean didn’t look so assured but his eyes did flash toward the shotgun that Eren held in his hand. His fingers were nowhere near the trigger.
“Go clean up your wounds,” Eren reminded, “If you’re too late, there’s a possibility you’ll get infected. Medicine is scarce around here, even so for Eldians.”
Although he was better at masking it, Armin still seemed stupefied from receiving this kind of treatment, especially coming from one of the Marleyan’s soldiers. “But we—”
“We don’t have time to argue,” Eren cut him short, only then did he sound stern. He needed to step away right now before he raised any kind of suspicion. “Just do as I say and keep yourself safe. Please.”
And then he left, leaving the two boys with frowns breaking on their faces.
For the first time in his life, Eren felt good.
For the first time in his life, he finally knew how it felt like to be human.
***
“So your name’s Jean?” Eren questioned as he gave him enough food to keep the boy alive for another day. Jean’s intense light brown eyes shimmered in delight when his nose caught a whiff of bread. His stomach growled, begging for attention.
“Don’t call me that,” he snapped back, taking the loaf of bread without saying a word of gratitude. He took a huge bite, chewing loudly as he muttered, “I don’t want a Marleyan calling my name. That’s fucking disgusting.”
“But you’re eating the food I gave you.”
“Shut up.”
“I’m sorry,” Armin joined in, sighing at his sibling’s behavior. “He has no manners whatsoever.”
“I do have manners,” Jean corrected, licking his thumb from the breadcrumbs. “But unlike you, I just don’t feel like playing a goody two shoes around those fuckers, including him.”
Eren, weirdly, found his attitude amusing rather than insulting. “Still don’t trust me yet, do you?”
Jean didn’t even spare him a glance. He strolled away, taking a seat at the edge of the frozen lake, picking up pebbles and throwing them aimlessly.
“Jean isn’t always like this, you know,” Armin said, scooting closer to the brunette. They were both out of Jean’s hearing. The blonde male thanked him when Eren pushed a bottle of vodka in his direction. He might not like the taste of it, but it did a great job at keeping his body warm. “He used to be all fun and cheery.”
But now he’s bitter and spiteful. “Him? Cheery?” Eren almost chuckled. “Doesn’t seem like it fits.”
“He was annoying but… Kind.”
The melancholy in Armin’s voice made him wonder. “I guess everybody changed during the war, huh?” And not for the better, Eren mused, turning pensive. Including me.
Armin looked up and saw how the sky was faintly painted with a light shade of red and orange. Maybe they still had a little time to talk before the sun came up and they had to return to reality. “Jean and I aren’t families by blood,” he said, his voice a bit hollow, just like his stare. “But to me, he feels like one. We’ve been best friends since forever so I always thought of him as my sibling. We were neighbors, that was how we knew each other. One day, as we were walking back from school, a group of Marleyan soldiers entered our block and killed everyone in sight. I thought something happened. I thought we were punished. But these men… they were laughing. I got fifteen, I got twenty, they said, counting the bodies. They were playing games.”
It was horrifying, he thought, the fact that these soldiers murdered people for fun. But it wasn’t as eerie as the way Armin retold the story—empty eyes staring far away into the night, his soul breaking with every word he spoke. But his voice was steady. Emotionless. He was numb. The tiny hairs on Eren’s nape rose in dread but he kept his lips shut and his ears perked up.
“I invited Jean and his mother into my home since we had a basement we could use as a hiding place,” Armin continued, hugging his knees to his chest, sniffling from the cold. Eren wanted to steal some clothes for him to wear, but it would be impossible for other soldiers not to notice him. “We thought we were safe there when suddenly, two soldiers broke through our front door. Our parents tried to buy us some time to run away and his mother trusted me with her son’s life. I was only ten back then, Jean was just as young. But she thought I was smarter, that I would find a way to keep her son safe. But I was so frightened, I couldn’t think. I couldn’t do anything. So I hid in a closet with Jean plastered against me, and we waited until the soldiers went away. I remember how tightly we pressed our hands against our ears because we knew things wouldn’t end well. It only took a few minutes, three gunshots, and a train of laughter coming from the Marleyan men. Then it was all… silence.” Armin breathed deeply. “The next thing we knew, when we stepped down from the closet, our feet were soaked in our parents’ blood. And we covered our mouths as we cried. We didn’t make a sound. ”
Eren sat frozen. He never had the chance to console someone before, and he wasn’t certain whether Armin needed one. Unsure of what to say, he murmured, “I’m sorry.”
Armin smiled, warm as the sunlight. “Don’t be. It wasn’t your fault.” He took the bottle from the soldier’s hand, taking another chug. “I’m sorry for rambling like this. What I’m trying to say is that… Jean used to be happy. He was a nice kid, but losing people you love tends to do that to you”
They both went quiet. Armin spent his time staring at Jean’s back, who was now trying to make small cracks on the edge of the lake. Eren, on the other hand, was busy trying to process all of the information he just received.
“Don’t look so sad,” Armin chastised gently. “I didn’t tell you my story so I could be pitied. I shared about my past so you’d realize that even after all these things that happened, Jean and I are still here. Alive and breathing. And it’s partially because of you.”
“Me?” Eren asked, startled. “I barely did anything.”
Armin gave him a knowing look. “I saw you back then. When that guy was strangling me, I saw you holding your gun like you were ready to shoot him. And a part of me believed that if he did hurt me more than that, you would’ve pulled the trigger for me.”
Eren turned scarlet. He wasn’t aware that he did that. Did his body move on its own?
“Am I wrong,” Armin took a closer look at the name sewed on his clothes. “Kruger?”
“Eren is fine,” the soldier said, not liking his Marleyan’s name. Ever since his mother got remarried to a Marleyan man, he was forced to change his family name. It had happened a few years back but he still hadn’t grown accustomed to it.
“You don’t look like a Marleyan to me,” Armin commented. His eyes were scrutinizing Eren’s appearance within every detail, but they were gentle, just like how he spoke.
“My parents were Eldians,” Eren said, a faint sad smile sketched upon his lips as he recalled his past. “My dad died in an accident a couple of years after I was born, and then my mother got remarried to a Marleyan guy. It happened way back before the war. For protection, my mother and I decided to change our names into his family name and pretended that we were Marleyan since birth.”
Armin listened intently. He stayed voiceless for a few seconds until he said, “And so you’re on their side now.”
Eren stiffened, every bit of his movements coming to a halt.
Was that true? Was that where his loyalty stood?
“Sorry,” the other boy hurriedly said. “I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”
“I’m trying to choose a better option,” Eren quietly answered. “Even when I belong to the Marleyan army, I still think that this is not the way it should be. Being a Marleyan doesn’t mean we’re better than the Eldians. We don’t have the right to abuse, steal, or kill. I—” he realized that he was talking in one breath, his chest felt suffocating. “I just want to change how the world works, but I don’t know how. I’m in no such position to make amends.”
Armin gazed at him with too much going on behind his eyes and Eren wondered whether that was a bad thing or a good thing.
“What’s your name then?” Armin queried. His smile was so delicate, so genuine, and juvenile. “Your Eldian name?”
“Jaeger…” Eren licked his lower lip nervously. It had been a long time since he last spoke it out loud. “Eren Jaeger.”
Armin grinned widely and offered him his hand. Eren took it, a bit awkward as he was not used to having friendly interactions with people. “Nice to meet you, Eren Jaeger.” Armin shook his hand. His smile was a contagious disease. “It’s nice to see that there are still hopes left in humanity.”
The soldier froze for a few seconds before his face warmed in a smile.
“Likewise, Armin.”
***
“Eren!” Armin wrapped his arms around his shoulders the moment they met by the lake again. Several nights had passed by and Eren breathed in relief to know that he looked pretty much the same as when he last saw him. “How have you been, my friend?”
“I’ve been well,” Eren answered, smiling lightly at him as they broke their hug. Jean Kirstein came trailing after him with a familiar scowl in his eyes.
Eren smirked, tossing him a few loaves of bread, along with a fresh bottle of water. “Here you go, Horseface.” They had become close enough to make fun of each other during conversations.
“These aren’t poisoned, right?” Jean asked with an ungrateful tone.
Eren rolled his eyes. “I’ve brought you food for like five times by now and you still ask me that.”
“I was just being careful.”
He snorted in response and Armin laughed, patting the soldier’s back. “Come on and sit with us,” the most affectionate man among them offered kindly. “There’s a lot I want to talk about.”
While Jean was the more unsociable one, Armin was quite talkative and possibly nicer than anyone Eren had ever met. He loved to share his thoughts—mostly about the sea and the sky—and his hopes for a better world. Eren found it refreshing that in a gloomy place like this, he could find someone who was truly visionary and imaginative enough to light up the place with his presence.
“I wish I could marry someone someday, you know?” Armin said, lying on the ground with his arms folded under his head. His eyes twinkled, reflecting the stars in the sky, while his brother was busily munching on his bread with loud noises.
“Armin, that’s not gonna happen,” Jean commented and Eren laughed because while Armin and he usually spoke in the Marleyan language, Jean always talked in his native one.
“What do you mean it’s not gonna happen?” Armin pouted, making him look even younger. “I think I could find a nice woman for me one day.”
“We can’t even find enough food to live by tomorrow if this prick weren’t here to help us.”
Eren shook his head in amusement when Jean rudely pointed at him. Days had passed by and Jean still insisted on calling him with any derogatory term he could come up with instead of his name. “Always glad to help, buddy,” Eren joked, which earned him another glare from the tall boy.
Armin poked his brother by the stomach. “Which is why you should be more grateful toward Eren, you idiot.”
Jean scoffed, continuously glowering at the soldier as he took a large sip of his water. “This is the least he could do for us, Armin. Those fuckers took our families away, remember?”
“Jean,” Armin called, exhaling heavily as he sat up. He sounded a bit more enervated than usual. “Eren is different. Don’t put him on the same page—”
“He’s not different!” He harshly barked and Eren wished Jean could stop speaking like he wasn’t there. “This bastard belongs to the army! He’s not our friend, Armin! He will never be! All Marleyans deserve to die and so does he!”
Eren was stricken aback. Was that how Jean really thought of him? Just another heartless Marleyan with no soul? Even after all that time they spent together?
“Jean!” Armin scolded, his forehead creasing in anger. “You take that back and apologize to him!”
“If he could bring my mother back from the dead,” Jean said, standing up on his feet. “I’d forgive him.”
Armin could only open his mouth but he couldn’t speak. He noticed that the other man was crying when he pivoted on his heel, walking away with a storm raging in his chest. And Armin wondered whether it was from pain, anger, or suppressed frustration. Perhaps everything at once.
“God, I’m sorry,” Armin apologized, returning his gaze to Eren. “You know he doesn’t mean what he said.”
Eren only replied to him with a smile but his heart was shattered.
He didn’t know that he had to take responsibility for the things he didn’t do.
***
“First time?” A Marleyan officer asked Eren with a teasing look in his eyes.
Eren swallowed thickly, trying hard to will himself not to blush as he nodded and stored his gun away inside his locker. The other man snickered, leaning his back against the wall as he spoke to Eren with his arms crossed on his chest.
“I still remember my first time,” he sneered and Eren only listened half-heartedly, showing no emotion. He felt revolted watching these Marleyan soldiers walking past him with arrogance and dirty looks on their faces. How could they laugh so easily after they forced these poor women to satisfy their needs? How could they just throw them away without feeling any remorse or offering a single form of gratitude?
“My friend forced me to do this,” Eren said and he didn’t know why he needed to explain it. Perhaps he just wanted to give himself a chance to redeem the guilt of the sin he was about to commit.
“Ah,” the man slurred, his slanty eyes twinkling. “You all rookies said that at first. But when you’ve done it once, you could never stop. Before you know it, you’re gonna want to fuck them every day, believe me.”
Eren’s fingers balled into fists and he had to put his hands on his back to keep them away from showing. The young soldier only tossed him a smile, not revealing the rage that bubbled inside his chest.
“Shall we get in line, then?” The officer asked with a wink and Eren tried not to slam his cocky head against the wall. Fucking piece of shit.
Eren took the stairs, marching toward the second floor of the military brothel, as the first floor was inhabited by the more ‘experienced’ prostitutes to serve the noblemen in the Marleyan government. As soon as he stepped into the hallway, Eren was met by twenty soldiers already lining up, one soldier for each door. There were ten rooms there in total—each one consisted of a bed and a bathroom for the comfort women to clean themselves up after ‘serving’ their bodies for twenty to thirty men a day.
Eren held his breath down for a few seconds so he wouldn’t vomit. This place was sickening.
“I’d wait to get into that room if I were you,” the previous Marleyan officer said, pointing at the door that stood at the end of the hallway. “She’s a total beauty and doesn’t scream much when we do it with her. You’ll like her.”
As much as he wanted to punch that man, Eren knew his position. He smiled, nodded, and bowed before he followed his direction. He took a deep breath.
Let’s just get this over with.
He waited for about ten minutes before a man came out from the room he chose. Eren recognized him instantly. Kenny Ackerman. The same man who almost killed Jean and Armin a few weeks ago just by the strength of his foot. Another bile of rage started to pile in his chest but Eren channeled it down to a polite bow. The taller man zipped his pants, and smirked at the tanned boy before he walked away with his chin held up high.
“Have fun with that whore, brat,” that soldier said and Eren sank his fingers to his palms to keep his fists to himself.
For now, he had to think about something else.
He drew in a long breath, and he did it one more time to stop his heart from racing before he circled his fingers around the doorknob. He turned it open.
The moment he entered the room, his eyes scanned the place for a brief second like how he was trained in war—to always know your surroundings well, they said. Eren noticed the broken wooden chair in the corner of the room. He saw how the dirty bathroom had no sink and no door—only a small tub with soiled water and a piss pot. He noticed how the bed was big enough for two people but it had no pillows or blanket. The sheets were crumpled and the white color had turned into a dirty shade of cream, with splotches of red. And he knew for a fact that those stains on the sheet weren’t just made from blood.
But his eyes stopped moving when he saw a woman lying on the bed with not a single fabric covering her nudity. Eren quickly averted his gaze from the sight, even though all he could see was her back. In that short moment, he managed to notice the purple bruises blooming along her spine, tainting her skin with dry blood.
For a few seconds, he could hear soft sobs coming from the girl’s lips. And when he secretly glanced, he noted how her shoulders were shaking as she hugged her knees to her chest. He didn’t let his eyes linger on her body for too long. He felt like he was being disrespectful to her. Eren knew his friends would’ve laughed at the way he behaved, but he couldn’t force himself to stare even if he wanted to.
The young soldier closed the door behind him and with that small thud, the girl immediately froze. Her sobs were muffled and contained, and slowly, she turned her body around until she was lying on the bed with her eyes on the ceiling.
Eren brought his head down, not wanting to witness any more curves of her body. But before that, he spotted how wet her eyes were and how hollow they looked. Those weren’t the eyes of someone who had the will to continue living. Those were the eyes of the defeated, who were willing to sacrifice their lives just so they could stop living in this rotten world.
“Do it,” she said, her body lying limp on the bed. “What are you waiting for?”
He was petrified to the bones. His mind stopped working.
Eren’s heart thundered vehemently behind his chest. He couldn’t do this. There was no way he could do this. He never even wanted to in the first place, but an order was an order. They were alone in the room. Magath wouldn’t be able to tell, would he? Eren could just pretend.
That’s right, he thought. I’ll just have to pretend.
And so, he said, “Cover up.”
The woman’s lifeless eyes grew a bit wide but only for a second before she smiled understandingly. “Ah,” she said, “So, you’re that type, huh?”
Eren frowned, not knowing what she meant and he blushed when she pushed herself up to sit on the bed. “What’s next?” she asked, not looking ashamed of showing her nude body to the man. She kept her eyes in his direction, but her stare was blank as if she wasn’t looking at him, but through him. “Do you want me to bend over too, Sir? Begging you to give it to me?”
“That’s not—” Eren blurted out, face aflame. “Lady, please cover yourself up. I’m not going to do this with you.”
Her smile faltered. “What?”
“I mean,” Eren sighed, turning himself around to face the door. It was troubling to be in the same room with a lady who was so stripped of her conscience that she could no longer care about wearing proper clothes. “I am not going to have sex with you. I’m just going to be here for a while before I go out so they’ll think I’m…” His blush smeared his cheeks. “…doing it with you.”
“You…” Her voice had lost its confidence, and instead of pain and disappointment, he began to hear hopes in her soft voice. “You’re not going to do it with me?”
“No, I’m not,” he said. “So, please… Put on your clothes.”
The atmosphere was thick with heavy tension and pregnant silence. Eren continued to stay mute, only trying to listen to the rustling sounds she’d make when she placed back her robe. Except, there were none.
“Have you dressed properly?” Eren asked, sounding a bit restless.
“I…” She fell quiet before she continued again. “I can’t find my robe.”
His eyebrows sewed together in confusion, knowing well that her robe was lying on the floor, just beside her bed. How could she not see it?
Then recognition dawned on his face.
Those lifeless eyes. That blank stare.
Eren turned around, facing her again and it seemed like she heard the sound of his shoes sliding against the floor. With her body jolting in alert, she hastily wrapped her arms around her front. Eren didn’t let his gaze travel anywhere else but her eyes.
“You’re…” he spoke, lips parted in shock. “You’re blind?” It was more like a statement than a question but whatever it was, that line gave more sense of peril to her.
“Which is something I should be grateful for,” she said, smiling again as if it was the only way she knew to keep her mind sane. “Considering how many demons are walking around this place.” It was an act, Eren noted, a way for her to appear resilient. Fearless, even when her fingers were shaking.
Eren chewed on his lower lip. That sentence couldn’t be any truer.
Cautiously, he took a step forward and she jerked, pulling herself back in reflex. Eren understood then. She spoke like she was used to this kind of treatment, but she was just a girl, scared to her bones. She acted like she was strong, but deep inside, she was probably even more fragile than the first time she was abducted and brought to this place.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” Eren spoke, loud enough for her ears to hear but not soft enough for her to stop being terrified of him. “I promise you with my life, I will not hurt you.”
“That sounds like a lot of promise coming from a Marleyan soldier,” she retorted, sounding like she was amused by it but she was not fooling anyone but herself.
“I’m not lying,” the boy said, taking another step and she inhaled sharply. Eren stopped, raising both hands in the air as if he was surrendering. “I’m just… I’m just going to fetch your robe back to you, okay?”
Her lower lip still trembled but she didn’t do or say anything.
Eren kept his eyes to the ground as he walked forward to collect her robe. She kept fidgeting on the bed until she felt soft fabric hugging her from behind. She touched the robe, releasing a shuddering breath at the familiar sense of comfort it gave to her skin.
“Put it on.” Eren’s voice was soft and tender. He kept his eyes glued to her face. “It’s probably only for a few minutes before somebody comes in and takes my place but…” His lips still curved, forming a reassuring smile even though he knew she couldn’t see it. “As long as I’m with you here, you’re safe.”
You’re safe… The words echoed in her mind, tugging upon her heartstring. Was there a moment in her life when someone gave those words to her?
Her eyes grew wide and when Eren retrieved his hand, she reached out and clamped her frail fingers tightly around his wrist. His breath hitched in his throat, stunned.
For a few seconds, they just stood there like that. One of his eyebrows was raised in confusion but he didn’t ask questions. He knew she was doing something. He just couldn’t tell what.
“You…” she breathed out, looking up at him with eyes that were too beautiful to be functionless. “You’re not lying…”
Eren blinked twice before his realization sank in. She had been checking on his pulse.
He smiled, affection growing on him. She was smart and cautious. He didn’t even think of that and he was a trained soldier, albeit still new.
“I’m not lying,” he assured her once again. “Can you trust me?”
She swallowed and let him go. Careful not to make any sudden movement, he kneeled in front of her and wrapped the robe properly around her body without letting his gaze drift south. Eren’s cheeks were burning bright but at least he managed to stop his fingers from shaking.
“You’re okay,” he whispered, and her eyes searched his face as if she was taking every bit of his appearance, though he knew that was not the case. “You’re safe with me.”
She pressed her lips into a thin line, turning them white. Then, she nodded. Eren was about to sigh in relief when her whole body convulsed. She covered her mouth with one hand and she cried. Hard.
The girl who tried to cover her fear, the girl who acted bravely as she stood against the world, broke apart in front of him.
“Thank you…” she sobbed into her hand, her visionless eyes shutting tightly in gratefulness. “Thank you, Sir… Thank you…”
It felt different than the way Armin thanked him—similar, only her words brought a lot more joy to his heart than he had ever felt in his twenty-one years of living.
He could feel his heart beating. He could feel it race.
He felt alive.
***
“So how did it go?” Theo Magath asked his companion as he rubbed his fingers together to keep himself away from the cold. “Did you like your early birthday gift?”
His scowl almost found its way to his face but he managed to catch himself at the last second. “Yes, Sir. But I’d appreciate it more if we don’t discuss it any further—if that’s alright with you.”
“What, are you shy?” The older man sneered. “Fuck, Kruger, you’re no longer a damn virgin so stop acting like one.”
Eren let the matter drop. His seniors could think whatever they wanted to. It wouldn’t matter to him anyway.
“So, what now? Are you going to pay another visit to the brothel?”
“Yes,” Eren said, startling the other man with his answer but he kept his smile to himself. Perhaps next time, he could bring one of his old sleeping shirts for her. It would at least be warmer than just a layer of a maroon satin robe.
“That’s my boy!” Magath clapped him on the back. “Already wanting for more, huh?”
Eren sheepishly smiled, doing his part of acting. Though the joy that bloomed in his chest was too real to be faked. Eren brought his hand up and his eyes lingered on the skin along his wrist—on the spot where she touched him. He remembered the way she thanked him and it bloomed again. The rush of happiness suffused his chest. A spark of joy from being able to give someone a chance to learn that life was an adventure worth living for.
***
Eren knocked on the familiar wooden door and opened it without waiting too long for permission. If he had waited, it would only raise suspicions from the fellow soldiers that were waiting in line after him. He couldn’t afford that to happen.
“Good evening,” Eren greeted, bowing a little to the lady in front of him. He felt a bit silly as he knew she couldn’t see. “It’s, umm… It’s me again. From the other day.”
The girl’s body went still and her expression showed that she was putting on her defensive demeanor. She kept her ears ready, trying to decipher if the soldier who let her go the other day was really as kind as she thought he was.
“Why are you here?” she asked, almost too coldly to his ears. “You said you didn’t want to sleep with me.”
“That’s right,” Eren smiled. “I only came here to talk.”
“Talk?” she repeated, covering her body with her robe and Eren blushed when he caught his eyes dancing along the curve of her waist. “What do you want to talk about, Soldier? How to use women for pleasure?”
It wasn’t like her spiteful words didn’t hurt him. They did. But he didn’t want to let it show. “You should have more respect for yourself,” Eren said and she almost growled. He gulped. Did I say something wrong?
“Respect?” She snapped. “You want to talk about respect? My mother sold me here to get enough money to stay rich for the rest of her life. I have to sleep with more than twenty men a day just so I could get some food to live through the night. And when I wanted to die, they stripped me out of my clothes and hung me outside for everyone to see how low I’d become. You want to talk about respect? That’s the respect your people gave to me!”
Every word that came out of her mouth felt like a javelin piercing through his chest. But Eren knew well that she had no other way of channeling her anger and frustration. A few days ago, she thanked him for the few minutes of break and forgiveness. Now, she realized that it wouldn’t contribute much to easing her pain so she broke apart once again. It wasn’t fair that she lashed out at him, she knew that too. But when you can’t even stop your own feelings from hurting yourself, would you care about theirs?
She was breathing hard, her chest heaving up and down.
After waiting a few seconds in silence, he softly asked, “Are you finished?”
She bit the inside of her cheek, hot angry tears streaming down her face. He wanted to brush them away with his thumb but he couldn’t. He shouldn’t. “I am not good with words,” Eren diffidently uttered, “And I don’t know if you would accept my apology on behalf of my country, but…”
Eren slid down to his knees, making a dull thud sound once they met the floor. He bowed down to her, his forehead pressed against the floor. “I beg for your forgiveness,” he said, eyes shut closed. “I apologize for the actions my country has done to you. You don’t deserve this. None of you do. I am in no position to grant you anything to pay back for the suffering you’ve endured. I don’t have permission to let you go, no matter how much I want to take you away from here. I am weak. I’m powerless. All I could do right now is bow my head down to you, ashamed and filled with guilt, hoping that you could forgive me, and—” He paused, a bit out of breath. “To ask you for… one thing.”
Her breathing was ragged and Eren lifted his head to gaze into her eyes.
“I want you to continue living,” he stated, and he could see the little jolt her body made, startled by his line. “I will not say that your life will be easy. I will not say that happiness will come to you by the end of this day or tomorrow. But I can promise you one thing: if you keep on living, I will try within my power to make some moments in your life, even if they are just measured in minutes or seconds, worth living for.”
She felt weak, her taut muscles loosening as she released the air she’d been holding. She closed her eyes, two droplets of tears falling to her cheeks.
“I will visit you every day.” Eren’s voice was like honey, sweet and comforting. “I will stay here if you want me to. I will read you books to keep you entertained. I will guard the door so you can have a few minutes of sleep. I will be your eyes and I will tell you when the cherry blossoms trees are blooming. I will describe the color of the sky and I will try every day for the rest of my life to find a way to release you from this place.”
“Why?” she asked, a crack in her voice. “Why would you do that for me?”
“Because ever since I met you,” Eren began and he could feel himself smiling. “I feel like I’ve found my chance to do something good for people, even if it was just only for a little. I saw how grateful you were when I let you go a few days ago. And I felt this joy spreading in my chest—so much that it scared me, and I want to feel that again. I want to make you feel that again. And that was the very reason why I’m doing this. Not only for you but for myself too.”
And she didn’t have to check on his wrist this time to know that he wasn’t lying.
***
This is the fifth time I’ve seen her and yet, she still appears to be scared of me. As if she still doubts my intention.
When I walk into her room, she seems to remember the sound of my steps. Her face is still guarded, her lips not forming a word. But she’s no longer angry or sad. She’s just there.
Breathing.
And living.
And that’s all I could ask for now.
***
“Soldier…” She called out with half-lidded eyes. Another week had gone by, or maybe even two, she could not tell. But he had visited her often enough for her to recognize his footsteps the second he walked into her chamber. Her wrists were still bruised from her previous encounter with a man who smirked wickedly when he exited her room. Eren had never felt so vexed with someone as he was back then.
He closed the door behind him, stepping closer to her spot. “I’m here.” He kneeled beside the bed, waiting for her to speak more. She was lying on her back, weak and breathless. Her voice sounded so hoarse as if her vocal cord was about to snap. Eren heard her painful screams before and every memory carved more scars on his heart.
“I’m sorry…” He lowered his head, unfamiliar with the pain. His teeth were cutting into his lower lip, his emotions churned like a hurricane. “I’m sorry…”
I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.
She sobbed quietly, reaching out a shaky hand. Soft tears started to fall from her vacant eyes at his apology. “It’s okay,” she said. “It’s not your fault.”
Eren cupped her hand with both of his warmer ones and brought it closer to his lips. His hot breath caressed her skin, soothing her bruise. “I’ll stay here,” Eren whispered, gently stroking her hair. “You don’t have to think about anything else as long as I’m here. You can sleep now…”
When she felt him lacing their fingers together, she breathed out in relief. “The skin of your palm…” A timid smile found her lips. “It’s so rough…”
Eren chuckled, even when it still felt like his chest was being torn open. “Must be because of my traini—” He stopped abruptly, his heart pounding. She was placing his hand on the side of her face, the callousness of his palm pressed against the smoothness of her cheek. Her lips bowed as she closed her eyes. She didn’t say a word, while his mind was jumbled with them.
His warmth was comforting. The texture of his palm was familiar. In his touch, she found her serenity. And just like that, her breathing became even. She began to fall asleep, drifting away from every wound and agony that life had inflicted on her. Right before she waned completely into her dreamland, a confession broke past her lips.
“Don’t leave me…”
Never had he felt his heart thrashing this wildly before. She was so beautiful. So pure, and so broken at the same time.Why did she have to go through all this pain?
“I won’t,” he promised herwith a voice so soft—it became a lullaby to her ears. “I won’t leave you. I’ll stay with you forever.”
I’ll stay with you for eternity.
***
“I’ve been having trouble sleeping lately,” Eren confessed, sticking a tree’s branch inside the firewood the three of them made that night. Armin sneaked a glance at his face, probably analyzing his expression to understand how Eren was feeling at the moment.
“Me too,” Jean muttered, yawning loudly as he threw a rock toward the frozen lake. Eren began to realize that it was a habit of his. “But you know the difference between you and me, Jackass? I don’t whine like a fucking girl about it.”
“Jean,” Armin scolded and his brother only shrugged. Eren mirrored the blonde boy’s apologetic smile, making gestures that he didn’t mind Jean’s words.
“Have you ever had a nightmare, Jean?” Eren asked and the other boy snorted loudly.
“My whole life is a nightmare,” he grumbled. “I wouldn’t know the difference even if I had one. And how many times do I have to tell you? Don’t call my name!”
“Please ignore my brother and his evil plan to spread despair to the world,” Armin joked and Jean threatened to throw pebbles at him. “What keeps you awake at night, Eren? Thinking of some lucky girl?”
While Jean snorted again, Eren began to smile sheepishly. “Sometimes… I guess?”
“Aaw, our little hero has finally found his heroine,” Armin cooed and Eren shoved him lightly by the shoulder.
“Shut up. It’s not always like that.” Eren huffed. “It’s more than that. I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in a while because…” He paused, staring at the firewood with weary eyes. “Well, I guess it all started on the first day I stood on the field with a gun in my hands. I’ve had my fair share of training as a soldier, but what you see in real life is… different than anything you’ve imagined it to be.”
“Why?” Armin queried. Jean, who didn’t even bother to listen, yawned loudly as he placed his head on his brother’s lap. Eren gave them both a look but Armin waved a hand nonchalantly, muttering, “Ignore him. He’s been this clingy from the first time we met. I’m used to it by now.”
“Please. I know you like it, Min.”
“What, having a grown-ass man’s head on my lap? Very unlikely.”
And Eren smiled because this scene he witnessed right there, reminded him how it felt like to have a family. It had been a while since he last saw his mother, and only God knew how much he missed her at the moment.
“When I began my training,” Eren revealed, “The only thing that mattered to me was how to protect my country. How to not get your comrades killed in battles, and how to survive. But now, I see that that’s not how it works anymore. Being a soldier means we have to be ready to take lives. To murder innocent people. People like you and Jean.”
Armin stayed silent. The fire danced beautifully in his eyes, a spark of amber gleaming inside a sapphire.
“I don’t want to kill anyone.” Eren sounded as if he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. “I don’t want to be a murderer. I want to be someone who can protect. Someone who can help those in need. Someone who can make them happy.”
Armin smiled at him, pressing a comforting hand on Eren’s shoulder.
“Someday you will be, Eren. Someday you will be.”
***
“Unwinds this world that ever turns,” Eren recited, his voice was velvety when he vocalized the words that were written on the poetry book he held in his hand. “Slow it to a week. Where daybreak brings her honey kiss.” Just for a few seconds, he let his eyes take a journey to her lips, tracing the shape of her mouth, beautiful like a cupid’s bow. He caught himself, the blood that rushed to his face streamed down to his chest, pumping his heart harder. “And twilight, earthly tenderness, with night her rapt mystique.”
The lady was lying on her side, her eyes staring blankly at the spot where she could hear Eren’s voice the most. His tone was gentle and his voice felt like a symphony to her ears. It was easy to let go but she kept her eyes awake. She hadn’t trusted him that much to let herself sleep when he was in the same room with her. The previous night was an exception. Her body had felt so weak—drained—and she didn’t have the power to put up a fight to stay awake.
“Unwind this world that spins so fast,” Eren continued and she thought she could listen to his voice forever. Husky but young, awkward but soothing. “Slow it to a day. When clouds flow back against Time’s bend, and dying dreams reverse their end. Lost skiffs return to bay.”
The way the sunlight hit her skin made it glow and Eren felt a bit nervous. She was, indeed, a beauty. Art to be admired. No wonder she was the jewel of this place. No matter how many bruises bloomed from those forced kisses she had, no matter how many handprints and cuts from dirty nails appeared on her spine, she still looked like she was the purest form a soul could ever take in this world.
The book in his hand had been forgotten, his eyes lingered on her curves, but they were not the eyes of a hungry man. They weren’t fueled by lust. They were… entranced like a child lying on the grass, watching the stars taking shape into pretty constellations.
“Soldier…?”
He jolted awake from his stupor. “U-unwind this world that twirls so wild,” Eren read after he cleared his throat, shifting his gaze away. “Slow it to an hour. When friendships paint a lonely sky. Spry dancers, all bounds defy; Fresh buds elate in flower.”
With every word, her eyelids became even heavier and she felt his voice getting nearer but, to her surprise, her thoughts remained calm. This was comforting. He was comforting. He was, by all means, her safe haven.
She fell asleep.
“Unwind this world that whips around,” Eren whispered, returning the small poetry book to the pocket of his beige coat. He kneeled beside the bed, brushing her stray hair away from her face with delicate fingers. “Slow it to that time.” He adored everything about her. The way her eyelashes fluttered against her cheekbones; the blissful look on her face as she sank deeper into her dream, her parted lips, and the soft breath that flowed through them. “When our goodbyes were yet of tongue, and Cupid’s arrow had just been flung.” Her cheeks were still wet with tears that never seemed to stop, purple bruises blooming on her porcelain skin.
How can I save you?
Closing his eyes, Eren leaned in and planted a tender kiss on the spot between her eyebrows. The lady stirred a little in her sleep and he reciprocated with a smile.
“Our love, a love sublime.”
***
“All right, now let’s get down to business,” Theo Magath stated, blinking Eren away from his thoughts. “Our witnesses claimed that there were a bunch of Eldians trying to steal something from our storage room last night. We’re gonna find out who they are.”
Eren felt an eerie feeling swirling in his gut. These last few days have felt like the sweetest dream that he staggered as he stepped back int
Sometimes I think about getting high with Eren and the lazy, needy make out session that would inevitably follow.
Straddling his lap while he looked up at you under half lidded eyes, a lazy smile that ends in a lip bite as he fits the joint between your lips, his hand rubbing your hip soothingly as you take a hit.
“Good girl, go easy,” he’d encourage on your inhale, his deep voice barely louder than a whisper.
You might cough a little and he would pull the joint back, muttering a low, “c’mere baby,” before taking a deep hit himself then using the back of your neck to pull your lips to his. He’d open his mouth against yours, exhaling the smoke into your mouth before slipping his tongue in alongside it. The kiss that follows is slow, wet, and when his hand drifts south to your ass where he starts a slow grind across his lap, your hushed sounds of pleasure that Eren swallows down only encourage him more.
You didn’t bother to look when he was setting the joint down on the ashtray next to the couch. When his kisses starting to trace along your jaw, your neck, teeth gently scraping your collarbone before a soothing lick of his tongue.
And it may have been the weed, it probably played at least a small part…what had caused the blood to rush through your veins, your head to fall back as your eyes fluttered closed. Or maybe it was both of his hands on your hips, keeping the pace of that slow lazy grind across his now hard cock beneath you. Or maybe it was the effortless way he slipped the straps of your tank top down, his lips wrapping around your perked nipples with a soft groan that had a shiver running up your spine.
“So fucking sexy,” he would whisper with your nipple still in his mouth, looking up at you with dilated pupils, not bothering to move the hair that had fallen in his face. His cheeks were flushed a rosy pink when he let his tongue circle your nipple, his hips bucking in a frenzied moment before voicing low, “I wanna fuck you so bad.”
“Please,” it came out as a whimper, your hands slipping into his long hair as he leaned up to offer a soft peck against your lips.
And moments later, with his pants pushed down just low enough to free his hard cock, your panties long discarded, the slow sink onto him had you biting into your bottom lip, your gaze locked on his while he leaned his head back on the couch.
“Ah, ah, fuck,” he would slow you down, one strong arm laid along the top of the couch, the other on your hips setting the pace as you claimed inch after inch of him, “There you go, sit pretty for me, okay?”
He had to know you couldn’t answer. Not when he was stretching you so perfectly, filling you so deeply. The quiet chuckle sounding from him told you he knew exactly what he was doing to you.
And when you were fully seated, his cock completely sheathed inside you, you would whine.
Whine because he would lift you up back up just barely, and you would feel the drag of his cock against your cunt for only a second before he paused. An inch, maybe two reclaimed by him.
If even a second longer had passed, you would have taken that inch back, pushed yourself down onto his lap until you had his entire cock sheathed inside your soaked cunt once more. But Eren didn’t give you a second. The weed had him extraordinarily lazy… but neverpatient.
He punctuated each word with a deep, slow, fuck up into you and it suddenly made sense why he reclaimed that inch. Why he made room for his cock to begin a pleasantly torturous pace in and out of your cunt while his lips locked onto your tits once more.
And with your hands gripped onto his muscular shoulders, as that familiar coil in your stomach wound tighter and tighter, the promise of release just skirting the edges of your desire raddled thoughts - Joint or no joint, you realized, would you always find a certain kind of high around Eren.
Series Summary: Over the last four years, you’ve become a rising star in the adult entertainment industry. Yet, you can’t seem to forget one of the actors you met in the very beginning of your career — Eren Jaeger. You might even say you’ve got a bit of a crush on him with how often you watch his videos. When you’re hired by Bellesa Films to shoot a sex video, they allow you to choose your partner, and without hesitation you request Eren Jaeger. And while the sex is bliss, like nothing you’ve ever experienced before, you’re ignorant to the truth behind your years-long crush.
Chapter Summary: You and Eren meet again, but this time it’s for a video you never expected to film: a porn movie with both Jaeger brothers.
Content Warnings: INCEST, smut, some angsty elements. Dub-con, Public sex, being filmed while having sex, threesome, heavy degradation, slapping, sex toys, cunnilingus, humiliation, nipple play, spanking, bondage - leash and restraints, throat-fucking, rough sex, dacryphilia, sadism, breath play, bukkake, daddy kink, squirting, choking, spit play, impact play, overstimulation, orgasm denial, cum eating, submissive reader and some submissive Eren, 69, rimming/ass eating, anal fingering and sex, double penetration, a pinch of a physical altercation, hurt/comfort
Length:17K
Eren is several hours early again. This time, he’s early out of sheer nervousness and dread, not like last time where he was excited and giddy to meet his years-long crush. Instead, his body is racked with a different kind of fear, a fear that you’d meet his brother and choose him over Eren.
It would make sense for you to choose Kruger, wouldn’t it? He’s definitely bigger, manlier, more popular, sexier. Not to mention you’ve been watching his videos for years – Eren could only wish that were true in his case. From the very first time Eren met you, he’d showcased what a downright idiot he is. Who’s to say that Kruger won’t be suave and impress you right away? Eren feels himself tugging at his roots and biting at his lip as his thoughts travel a hundred miles a minute. He feels it in his bones, that the minute you meet Kruger – the impossibly cool and much more attractive version of himself, the version of himself that you’ve been pleasuring yourself to for years – he’ll lose the fight for your heart. And that thought terrifies him.
A sea of emotions – self-loathing, doubt, jealousy, nerves – it threatens to swallow Eren whole. He sits on one of the couches, far from the cameras pointed at the massive bed in the center of the room. Every time he glances up at the bed, he’s reminded of what’s to come, and bile rises to his throat as he pictures the moment you will fall for his brother over him. Who’s to say what happened between you two wasn’t just a fluke? That his identical twin brother won’t be able to do the same, or do even better? Eren fears the worst, a leg bouncing rapidly in place and his fingers strumming unpractised anxious rhythms over his fabric-covered thighs.
For a while it’s only the set crew who are working, buzzing around like worker bees, adjusting this and setting up that, while awaiting the direction of their queen. To Eren’s dismay, their queen turns out to be an irritable blonde with a penchant for testing his patience.
“Hey baby boo,” Zeke greets his brother, Eren feeling a light smack on the back of his head as Zeke tap’s his skull with a bundle of bound papers.
The script, Eren realizes, as he soothes the sting on the back of his head.
“Will you ever stop fucking doing that? Shit hurts.” Eren asks with irritation clear in his voice.
“Absolutely not,” Zeke grins, the rolled up script hovering over Eren’s head.
“Didn’t know you were directing today,” Eren grumbles, sticking an arm out to collect the plans for his demise.
“And miss this family reunion? Not even the Euro World Cup could stop me.”
“You’re the fucking worst, Zeke,” Eren sighs, a hand coming up to his forehead to push his bangs back away from his face as his other hand takes the script from Zeke. His eyes scan the first page, rolling his eyes at the stupid porn title ‘TWINS TAG TEAM GIRL INTO SUBMISSION’.
“Read it. Memorize your lines. Hair and wardrobe is coming in an hour,” Zeke says, standing before his brother. Eren is too busy reading the script to form a reply, so Zeke adds, “and Eren?”
Eren looks up.
“Stick to the damn script this time. Your brother’s patience is much thinner than mine. He’d ring us both with his own two hands if you pull that romantic shit again.”
As Zeke walks away, Eren’s thoughts go back to you, back to the last video you both filmed together. How amazing that experience truly was. He’s disappointed at having to film this instead – his eyes hover over the words ‘throat fucking’,‘leash’, ‘whore’. As his eyes travel further down the script (‘vibrator’, ‘cumslut’, ‘slap her face’), he’s stunned to realize what you’ve both gotten yourself into. Neither of you have filmed anything like this, and it only further fuels his doubts.
Eren never watches his brother’s porn videos – no need to fuel his insecurities any further. So he had no idea what kind of video the three of you were making today until he saw the script. But now that he knows that you watch Kruger’s videos – and get off to them, no less – he’s doubting everything he knows about you.
What if you likethis?
What if you prefer this, even?
What if you fall for Kruger instead of him?
What if Kruger out performs him?
What if he brings you to heights that even Eren can’t reach?
What if…
What if…
What if…
Those are the only words that cloud his mind for the next 52 minutes.
Kruger and Eren may be identical twins, yet they’re anything but identical.
While Eren typically arrives to sets hours late, Kruger is punctual. Eren comes to set dressed casually, as if he could care less about the job he’s about to do – which in some ways is true. Because why should he dress up if he’s going to be taking it all off anyway? But Kruger? With him, he knows that image is important – his entire brand is his image. He always comes on set impeccably dressed, as if waiting to be called onto a runway at any moment, his movements trailed by the lingering scent of his expensive Tom Ford cologne.
When he walks on set, sunglasses perched high on his nose, loose chestnut hair cascading over his shoulders, he arrives exactly 52 minutes after Eren began spiraling. Today he wears a fitted black t-shirt over a dark pair of pants tucked into expensive boots, his strong arms on display along with a watch that costs more than several months of Eren’s salary. Not that anyone’s counting.
As his eyes scan the room, Kruger’s surprised to find his younger brother’s even on set – Eren isn’t known for being punctual. Eren’s still sitting on the couch, eyes glazed over as he’s lost in thought, his script hanging loosely in his hands. He’s startled out of his trance by a smack to his shoulder blades, a rough push that was so forceful he found himself stumbling in his seat.
“You actually showed up,” Kruger speaks down to his seated sibling as he retracts his hand, his voice deep and laced with condescension. He lifts his sunglasses, resting them on the crown on his head, eyeing his brother with a more scrutinizing look now that the shades were out of the way. Kruger and Eren lived in completely different worlds – they had different friends, resided in different cities, and lived completely separate lives. So it was rare for them to be even in the same room, save for reluctantly attending family gatherings. And Eren wishes to keep it that way.
“I’m surprised you’d agree to this,” is Eren’s reply. He unwinds the script that he had folded in half in his nervous hands, and pretends to read over the lines, anything to get his brother to leave him alone. But for Kruger, this set was his turf. He had no reason to back off, not when he’s the one with the upper hand here.
“You should be thanking me, brüderchen,” he says, with a smirk and a teasing uptick of his voice at the diminutive word. Eren wants to tell him to stop calling him that, to remind him that he’s literally only ten minutes older, but Kruger continues to speak, “Maybe you’ll actually get pretty popular after being featured with me. Cause that OnlyFans shit isn’t getting you anywhere. I’m practically doing you a favor.”
“I don’t care about getting popular,” Eren retorts, not even bothering to look up at him. Sure, his older brother has his face, but sometimes Eren wishes he could wipe it right off of him. Eren thinks if he looks up now and sees the face of the man his crush has been lusting after for years, even if it is his own fucking face, he’ll lose it. So instead he simmers, his feelings stirring within him but controlled as best as he could manage.
Kruger crosses his arms over his chest. He’s bigger than his younger brother, both in stature and in muscle mass, and it shows now that he’s towering over Eren’s seated form.
“Hope you’ll be able to keep up. We’re not doing any of that romantic shit you’re used to.”
Eren grits his teeth, his mind flooded with images of the video he filmed with you. If he’s being honest, he doesn’t want to film a hardcore porn video with you. He really enjoyed that ‘romantic shit’ – he enjoyed that more than any sexual encounter he’s ever had in his life. But all of his self-doubts and self-confidence issues aside, there’s another reason he doesn’t want to film this threesome: he doesn’t want to see you hurt.
“She’s not used to hardcore stuff. Go easy on her,” Eren says, finally taking a moment to look up at his brother. Green irises meet green, and for a moment Kruger’s surprised to see his brother looks quite serious. Eren never seems to care about anything. But suddenly he shows a seriousness when it involves this woman?
And then, Kruger laughs. It’s a deep rumble from his broad chest, incredulous that his brother would even make that request. Did he not read the script?
“If you want to keep working in this industry,” Kruger starts, and he leans down closer to his brother as he continues speaking, “You’re going to have to grow a spine, brother.”
Before Eren can even begin to think of a reply, Kruger spots a tall brunette and a short blonde woman walking into the room, a trunk and a pair of suits with them. Kruger nods his head towards them, informing Eren that they are the stylists for the two of them. Eren simply nods in acknowledgement. Before they can come over to begin their work, Kruger says, low enough for only his brother to hear:
“I’ve seen her videos before.”
Eren suddenly feels even worse, if that was possible. As if his heart wasn’t already lost somewhere in his stomach, it must be in his ass now. It was bad enough that you watched Kruger’s videos. But now he’s aware of yours? What’s next, does he think you’re –
“She’s hot. Can’t wait to see what she’s like in action, when it’s real and she’s not faking.”
Eren, his voice low and his eyes trained on the ground, only responds with a shaky, “Our videos weren’t fake.”
He says this, partly to his brother, to tell him he’s wrong. That real sex can be had without having to make it a hardcore porn – hell, you came five times the last time you both filmed together. He definitely knew that you weren’t faking.
But mostly, he says it to remind himself – because that’s the only thing that separates him from Kruger, isn’t it? The fact that the connection between you two was real, and not just you watching videos late at night in the comfort of your bed. The only thing that keeps Eren’s hopes from turning to dust is the fact that Kruger still doesn’t have that real connection with you. That for now, he’s still some virtual image, and that Eren is real and the pleasure he gave you was real. The kisses, the laughs, they were real. He felt a spark between you two – one that Kruger can’t possibly have by only being the man you watch on your phone screen.. And hopefully, he never will have it.
Kruger only acknowledges Eren’s words with a low “hm.”
And as they are both ushered to respective areas to dress and prepare for the scene, Eren can’t help but wonder what you were feeling right now. Are you excited to finally be with his brother? Do you want Kruger instead? Or do you have the same feelings he does? He wishes he knew.
He hopes that in an hour from now, once the cameras start rolling, that he’ll find out.
You’re sitting in a chair across from a mirror, your body practically swaying back and forth, barely able to contain your nerves. It’s palpable, the way your eyes bounce across the walls and your legs vibrate with your jitters. As the makeup artist in front of you paints on your red lipstick for the third time (only because you keep chewing your lips), she notes the way you pull your bathrobe tighter and cross and uncross your arms multiple times.
“First time?” she asks, arching an eyebrow.
“No, no,” you try not to shake your head, her pinky resting on your cheek to remind you to stay still as she paints your face. “I’ve just… never worked with Kruger before. I’m not sure what to expect. Guess I’m just…nervous.”
You’ve been a porn actress for years now – so meeting new actors shouldn’t have you on the edge like this. But you were a nervous wreck, fraught with the questions repeating in your mind: What’s Eren’s twin going to be like? Is Eren okay with being in a threesome with his brother? Is he okay with me being in a threesome with his brother?
The makeup artist lets out a single tuft of air, a pathetic excuse for a chortle, her expression quite bored. Her chin-length black hair sways gently as she pulls back from your face. “That’s what they all say. We’ll see how you feel at first touch-up.”
“What do you–”
Suddenly she takes out a spray bottle, presumably setting spray, though she whips it in front of your face so fast you don’t have a chance to read the label. She sprays it in a ‘Z’ pattern, the mist dusting across your dolled-up face, before she sets it down with a loud smack against the wooden table. “You’re all set. Try not to bite your lips off before you start filming.”
You nod as she sets down her tools next to the makeup bag on the desk in front of you. She saunters off, effectively cutting your conversation short, as she starts to chat with another member of the crew. She leaves you alone, heading to the back of the room, and you take the time to stare at your reflection in the mirror. She may be apathetic, but she did a damn good job – you look sexy. Hair cascading in waves down your back, a sultry cat-eye with smokey eye shadow, vivid red lipstick delicately painted across your lips. You look so much more alluring and so much more dangerous than when you are made-up for romantic porn. The sight only fuels your anxiety further, the simmering bubbles in your stomach an out-right rolling boil now. You admit to yourself that you’re curious: you’ve seen Eren’s – no, Kruger’s – porn before, but you mostly stick to his solo videos. So you aren’t sure what a threesome would entail, especially one with his own brother. You almost bite on your lip again out of nerves but when your eyes catch sight of the makeup artist in the background of your reflection you decide against it for fear of incurring her annoyance a fourth time.
Instead, your fingers come up to brush against the black leather collar you’re wearing. Besides the bathrobe, and leather cuffs on your wrists, it’s the only thing you’re wearing. Your index finger hooks itself into the D-rings of your collar, tugging slightly, just to test how it will feel. There’s three of these rings on the collar: one in the center, and two at each side of your neck. You can see the leather wrist straps poking out from underneath the bathrobe. A short chain adorns each cuff, with clasps at the end of the chain. You’ve never used this before, but it’s glaringly obvious that the two chains on your wrist connect to the two loops on either side of your neck. The front loop… well, when your eyes dart across the room, to the long black leash laid flat on the bed, you know what that loop is for. The only other item of clothing in the room is a set of red pumps, a bright red to match your lipstick with heels sharp enough to kill.
As you stare at yourself in the mirror, you reflect on the last time you spoke to Eren, at the conclusion of the last video you filmed together.
With terror taking hold of Eren’s features, he said to you, “Kruger wants to work with us.”
If you had received that call even a few hours ago, you would have perhaps been excited, ecstatic even, to hear the news from Hitch. Instead, you stared at Eren, unable to speak, the truth about your relationship weighing heavy in your lungs.
“Babe? Should I say yes?” You registered that Hitch was talking on the other line, but you were unable to break eye contact with Eren, his frown deepening with each passing second. Hitch continued, “You know how it goes with the big agencies, they’ll find someone else if we don’t reply…”
She continued talking, but the only voice that stood out was Eren’s.
“Say yes,” he said.
You couldn’t fathom why he would agree to this, your eyebrows stitched and your eyes taking on a look of confusion. The sex you just had with Eren – it was nothing like anything you’d ever experienced before, and you hoped it was the same for him. You thought you’d felt a deeper connection with him – so wouldn’t he want to stop you from taking this job?
He sighed, swallowing the urge to vomit, or maybe to sob, he didn’t know what to call it, this feeling that made him want to crawl under a rock and never come out. How naive was it for him to believe that you’d really fallen for him the same way he’d fallen for you? And of all fucking people, it had to be his brother.
“This is what you’ve wanted for years right, to work with him?” Eren asked, a bite to his words that you hadn’t ever heard before. He didn’t mean for his words to sound so pointed, but what could he do about his feelings? He wasn’t anything like his brother – Kruger was confident, brazen, ambitious. Meanwhile Eren was this pathetic boy who wore his heart on his sleeve, stumbling along with no goals in his life, too cowardly to do anything other than give up after asking you to get coffees with him. If he really would have tried harder, maybe things could have gone differently all those years ago, and you would’ve never ended up watching Kruger’s videos. So no, Eren wasn’t frustrated with you – it was all with himself.
But in your state of mind, with your body feeling like it was made of lead, and your heart feeling like it was lodged somewhere in your throat, you couldn’t muster the courage to correct him. You wanted to say to him ‘no, I’ve been wanting to work with you again ever since that first video four years ago.” But with the way he spoke, the way his face looked so dejected, the way his whole body slumped with the news – how could you stand to hurt him any further, to try and even deny what was true. Because yes, it was true that the man you’d been pleasuring yourself to wasn’t him, but his brother. And yes, it was true that over the years, the desire to film with the Eren you met four years ago morphed into a desire to film with Jaeger, too.
Eren saw your hesitation, and took it as a confirmation that what he said was true. He swallowed his pride and added, “It will be good for your career too, filming with such a big name like his. Take it. It’ll get you further than filming with me alone.”
He offered you a smile – though it looked pained, like a wince, but it was an attempt. You opened your mouth to speak, but again Hitch’s voice blared in your ear.
“What will it be?”
You stared up at Eren once more, and he gave you a single nod.
“Okay.”
You walked around the room aimlessly as Hitch gave you further details about the shoot. And by the time the conversation with Hitch was over, you turned around to look for Eren, but Eren was gone.
You left the room, walking back towards the main filming area, bumping straight into Hange in the process.
She looked confused, her mouth open as she was about to say something, but you frantically interrupted her.
“Where’s Eren?”
“He, uh,” she turned to her side, pointing a thumb towards the exit, “He just walked out. Are you guys–”
“Can’t talk right now, Hange!” You told her as you began a mad dash for the door. She smothered the urge to laugh at both of your antics, shaking her head as she continued on walking.
Meanwhile, you burst through the exit door, your hand casting a shade over your eyes as you looked into the parking lot under the rays of the afternoon sun. You could see Eren, just about to enter his Ford.
“Eren!” You called after him. He froze for a moment, before slowly turning around as you ran up to him.
“Hey,” you said, looking up at him. You feigned a smile, but he didn’t return it. His face was as blank as you’d ever seen it, completely unreadable.
“Hey,” he replied, though he didn’t match the cheery uptick that you had to your voice.
“I wanted to talk to you before you go,” you started, your hands intertwining behind your back as you bit your lip.
Eren was impassive, leaning his back against his car door and replying with a short, “Okay.”
“I had a great time today–amazing, actually.”
Eren stuffs his hands in his pockets, eyes downcast and unable to meet your gaze. “Yeah, I did too.”
“Are you sure you want to go through with the next shoot? We don’t have to if–” Your words trailed off when Eren finally looked down at you directly, his lips pressed in a firm line and the warmth in his eyes all but extinguished.
“Yeah, really. It’s fine.” Eren was never a good actor, but he gave this his best performance. He had to. He kicked one of his feet against the pavement, continuing, “It would be good for both our careers. He’s got that big channel on PornHub, bigger than either of us. And you’re doing so well recently…a rising star paired with a name like his? Maybe you’ll make your way up to being the next Lana Rhoades or something,” he said with a short laugh, one that sounded hollow.
You chuckled lightly in response. “You think so?”
“Yeah.”
“Thanks.” There was a long pause, before you thought to yourself ‘fuck it, unprofessionalism be damned’. “Hey, Eren… Do you want to maybe get dinner or coffee together?”
He removed a hand from his pocket to scratch at the back of his nape. “Actually, I have to get going. Got to, uh, pick up my niece from soccer practice. I’ll call you?”
He turned around, motioning to open the car door, but you held onto his forearm to stop him.
“Don’t you need my number?”
“Right.” He turned back towards you, taking his phone out of his pocket. He handed it to you with a blank contact on the screen and you entered your name and number before handing it back to him.
You offered him a smile, “I’ll be waiting for you to call, then?”
“Yeah. I’ll call you.”
You took a couple of steps back and watched as he silently got into his car, a single pensive glance back at you before he drove away. You waved him off, hoping that you’d hear from him again.
But Eren never called.
You’re woken from your reverie by a voice calling out from the front door of the room “Ready on set!”
You immediately hop off the chair, making sure to smooth down any flyaways and dustoff your bathrobe as you glance into the mirror one last time. Then, you make your way to the bed, placing the deadly red heels onto your feet, and holding the leash in one of your hands. You take a deep breath, steadying your nerves, before plastering a smile on your face and following the crew towards the set.
When you walk into the room where the shoot will take place, you notice the buzzing of employees and the shouting as Zeke is running around giving last minute instructions. But none of that matters once your eyes find the men you were looking for.
The Jaeger brothers are truly incredibly handsome. You see them from the side, as they are staring at the set, arms crossed and looking rather bored as they wait for you to come in. They’re both dressed exactly the same – dark trousers, white button up shirts, and black waistcoats with black ties. They are both wearing their chestnut brown hair down, Eren’s length reaching just at his shoulders, while Kruger’s is maybe a couple inches longer, grazing his collarbones. They don’t notice you right away, and it gives you time to memorize their features. You can tell them apart, now that you see them side-by-side, because Kruger is even more massive in person than the videos do justice.
You never thought that identical twins could be built differently, but Kruger is taller, his chest is broader, his muscles larger. Everything about his presence is so imposing. While Eren is tall and muscular, he’s definitely more lean, and everything about him is open and approachable. You think of Eren as cute, adorable even. He’s funny, and a bit dumb, but harmless.
But Kruger? Even from afar he’s almost fearsome.
When Eren sees you, he looks at you like he always does: his crush on you is hopelessly apparent in his gaze, and even with the awkward situation you’ve found yourselves in he finds himself smiling at you. Everyone is already positioned to start filming, so you don’t have much time for introductions. As you walk into the room, you’re ushered by one of the crew towards the bed.
You catch a glance at the brothers, meeting their gaze. Eren manages to squeeze out a simple, “Hey”, any other words that he could have said lodged in his throat. His emotions are too conflicting now to make any sense of them, and on top of that you look so damn hot right now that even if it was just the two of you he didn’t think he could have said a word lest he look like an idiot again.
You want to introduce yourself to the older Jaeger brother, and to at least exchange some kind of conversation with Eren, since things ended so awkwardly last time, but there’s no time to waste when the cameras are about to start rolling.
At the crew’s direction, you take your place by the edge of the bed, removing the bathrobe that covered your naked body. You hand off the leash in your hand and the robe to an employee and sit down on the plush mattress, one long bare leg crossed over the other, eyes concentrated on the Jaeger’s off to the side. Kruger and Eren are both talking to their brother Zeke behind the camera in front of you, nodding and discussing what, you don’t know, but you presume it’s about the scene you’re about to film. The two brothers are facing you, a smile offered to you from each. But unspoken in their smiles are their intentions – Eren’s smile is reassuring and earnest, while Kruger’s is teasing and predatory, like a hunter about to take its prey. It makes a shiver run up your spine.
You don’t dwell on it too long, because suddenly Zeke claps once, loudly. Kruger walks in your direction as Zeke begins to direct each cameraman and each of the lights to the point of focus. You place your palms flat on the bed behind you, sticking out your bare chest, your legs closed before you. They’re pressed together to prevent them from shaking. The anxious knot in your stomach only tightens when Zeke shouts out “action!”.
The taller Jaeger brother, Kruger, is the first to stand before you. It isn’t like that last time with Eren – there aren’t any shy smiles, no awkward titters, no avoiding glances. Kruger may not have said a single word yet, but his eyes speak for him. The way they stare you down, almost glowing green with their ferocity. They are venomous, smoldering, dangerous. His intense gaze is paired with a small upturn of his lips, a smirk that you recognize from the many times you’ve watched his videos. You already know how this will begin. And it makes you clench your limbs in anticipation, as if your body is conditioned to feel aroused at the sight of him.
He reaches a hand out for your cheek, a thumb grazing your skin, touch lighter than a feather. It’s deceitful, you know, because that’s the only time he’ll ever be that gentle. He’s so immensely tall, a massive 200 cm, that you have to crane your neck up to look at him as he touches you. He thinks you look cute, innocent even, despite the collar and the straps on your wrists, as you blink up at him. Your makeup is meant to be sexy, but Kruger knows when it comes to hardcore porn, you’re practically a virgin. The makeup doesn’t fool him, but it does make the illusion just a bit more enticing.
It always begins with that one line, delivered in that low voice of his that is almost a growl, words laced with scorn, tongue sharp like a whip.
“Think you can handle me, baby girl?”
It’s the line, the one he always starts with, even when he’s solo and teasing his viewers. When you watch his porn at home, you’d talk back to your phone. You’d whisper, “Yes, Daddy,” as you’d begin the ritual of slipping your fingers past the waistline of your bottoms. You’d believe it, like clockwork, that you could handle him. That those women on the video, the ones who always said yes so hesitantly, with eyes so fearful and lips stuttering – you’d think they were faking it, exaggerating it for the clip. You’re no stranger to doing that yourself in your own videos.
But right now, sitting before him, you know exactly how those women feel.
You’re unable to take your eyes off of his harsh murky green, almost black irises. All four plus years of your experience as a porn actress is tossed out the window with the way Kruger looks at you. You can only dole out a weak, “Yes.”
Before you can even blink, Kruger has your cheeks pinched between one of his large hands. It’s rough and sudden, the way he grabs your face, and your eyes flicker towards Eren, a statue standing still right behind the camera waiting for his cue. His expression is one of worry. But this is just the beginning, and it’s what you signed up for. So you build some resolve, shut away your feelings, and become the actress that you are. Your eyes meet Kruger’s once again.
“Yes, what? Whore.” He spits out the last word like it’s poison.
More confidently now, shaking off your nerves, you reply, “Yes, Daddy.”
He doesn’t let go of your face, instead bending down to meet you. You’re overwhelmed by his scent, his size, his striking features. His face comes right in front of yours, and up close he’s even more handsome than any camera could capture. You think he’s coming down for a kiss, but instead he chuckles, just a single breathy laugh.
“You want us to fuck you? I wanna hear you fucking beg for it.”
Eren walks into frame as Kruger’s talking, silently taking his place next to Kruger in front of you. You begin to lean back just slightly, to give Eren room, so one of his hands can come up to tease your nipple. That single touch, just a light brush against your skin, his fingers impossibly warm, already has you sighing into him.
Kruger continues, “Beg for my brother and I to touch you, like a fucking slut.”
Eren’s glad he doesn’t have as many speaking lines as his brother. He only watches, him and his brother hunched over you, hands grazing your body. Your hands slide up each of their chests, fingering over the buttons of their black waist coats, before forming a fist around the base of their neckties. You pull them in closer to you by their ties, just as planned in the script, and yet Eren still finds himself surprised to see that you are slowly settling into your role. With each passing second your hands became more steady, your gaze more alluring, your movements more enticing. You’re a natural at acting, and it shows with every sex video. This is no exception, Eren realizes.
“Please,Daddy,” you begin, your voice whiny and breathy, and the two men lean in to kiss at your throat, behind your ear, down the edge of your jaw. They’re working in sync, actions mirrored on either side of you, despite never having filmed together before, leaving languid open mouth kisses that leave you reeling. You realize then that Kruger also has a tongue piercing, like his brother. The feeling of their piercings against your skin adds to the sensation, the metal adding pressure to your skin as they glide across its surface. Just the heat of their mouths and the touch of their palms, kneading at your breasts, has you already moaning into your words, “Please touch me.”
Kruger pinches the nipple in his hand, hard, earning a yelp from you as his teeth scrape against your collarbone. Eren speaks his first line as Kruger leans down to take your nipple between his teeth.
“What else do you want us to do to you, hm?”
His voice isn’t as deep as his brother’s, nor is his accent as thick, but he’s had years experience of filming porn, and when he’s called upon to be sexy he can do it too. His voice now is just as alluring, just as hot and heavy, just as sensual. It’s foreign, to be filming with Eren when he isn’t his cute, awkward self. In the back of your mind, you realize: youmiss it.
You’re supposed to say “I want your mouth on my clit.” But the words never come. You’re so busy focusing on the sound of Eren’s voice, that you miss your line. You’re snapped out of your thoughts when Kruger barks out, the palm of his hand meeting your cheek in a harsh smack. “Good girls answer when they’re spoken to. You want to be a good girl, don’t you?”
You want to be a good girl, don’t you?
Eren’s reminded of the last video, when he’d spoken those exact words to you too. But the situation in which you found yourselves couldn’t be more different. While you both teased each other, with soft kisses and smiles, this was a different experience entirely. Especially when you replied breathlessly, sounding so desperate for air he’d think you were suffocating.
“Yes daddy, I wanna be your good girl.”
Kruger suddenly takes a rough hold of your hips, lifting you off the edge of the bed, Eren unlatching himself from your skin in the process. Kruger’s so strong, he quite easily handles you like a limp ragdoll, tossing you onto the center of the bed. He stands back to his feet, looking down at you with disdain.
“Then be a good girl and fuck yourself for me. Stuff those fingers up your cunt.”
You watch the brothers from your place on the mattress, bringing your hand down to your cunt. You fixate your gaze on Eren, his expression unreadable, as you plunge your fingers into your dripping hole.
Eren crawls up the bed first, sitting on his knees at your side as you pump your own fingers in and out of yourself. As Kruger rolls up his sleeves, Eren’s kissing at your neck once more, a hand coming down to rub circles onto your clit. You can’t help but arch your back against the sheets, Eren’s lips suckling at your throat as his fingers work magic on your clit.
“Eren,” his name slips past your lips, and you turn your head to face him. He can’t help but deviate from the script, when you look at him with those sultry eyes and he catches sight of your flushed face. So instead of moving down to latch onto your breast like he’s supposed to, he kisses you. He doesn’t say anything verbally, but his kiss conveys everything he needs to say. He kisses you like it’s like the last thing he’ll ever do, biting and sucking at your lip, mingling his labored breaths with your own. His pierced tongue traces your lips as he swallows your mewls and moans, low groans of his own reverberating through your skin. Your fingers in your cunt and his fingers over your clit move at a steady rhythm, and you want to cum like this, want to cum because of his and your fingers.
But you’re reminded of Kruger’s presence as he joins you both on the bed, harshly splitting your legs apart. Despite your little digression, Kruger continues to follow the plan. He’s the one in charge here, and he’ll make you realize it. He takes an ankle in each hand and harshly throws them over his shoulders, your heels falling off your feet and tumbling off the bed to the ground with a harsh thud, as Eren’s mouth heads down to your breasts, where he’s supposed to be.
“Keep those legs spread,” Kruger says, leaning down to settle between your thighs. His large hands splay across your inner thighs and push them apart as far as they can go. You wince, but continue to finger yourself to the rhythm of Eren touching your clit. Eren’s mouth is wrapped around your nipple, sucking and nipping at the skin, his tongue flicking across the hardened bud.
Kruger’s lips find a spot to rest against your inner thigh, and the sensation is nothing like you’ve felt before. His tongue licks a stripe across the skin between your pussy and your thigh, and you shudder in response.
Is his piercing vibrating?
“Fuck–you’re fucking drenched, all that for us?” he asks, the squelching sound loud as you continue to finger yourself so obediently. You nod helplessly, a moan slipping past your lips as Eren’s fingers continue their motions right above your own.
“Gonna fuck your needy cunt with my tongue,” Kruger continues, voice low and breath fanning against your skin, a chill running up your spine as his breath hits the wet folds of your glistening cunt. “You’ll cum when I tell you to, hure.”
You don’t get a chance to react to his insult, because his mouth moves to your cunt, taking one of your lips between his teeth before sucking on it harshly. Between the sting of his bite and the vibrations of his piercing, you instantly jolt against the mattress, back arching up and a whine escaping your lips. Eren places a hand on your stomach to hold you down, though his touch isn’t as forceful as Kruger’s. It’s calm, soothing even, to feel the weight of his palm against your middle.
Then Kruger takes your fingers out of your cunt and holds them up to Eren’s hand. “Her pussy’s so fucking sweet – why don’t you have a taste, brother?”
Eren removes his fingers from your clit and instead they encircle your wrist. As Kruger leans down to press his tongue onto your clit, Eren brings your fingers to his lips, right by your breasts. He holds your gaze as he sucks your slick off your fingers, his loose hair brushing against your chest and his eyes impossibly bright green, as always. He waits for that moment, the way your features twist into one of pleasure as Kruger’s vibrating piercing and hot tongue make contact with your sensitive nub.
“Ah– holy fuck!”
Eren sucks off your fingers, releasing them with a loud pop, while Kruger immediately dives in. There’s no moment to adjust, no sweet kiss before a round of soft licks – no, instead he squares in on your clit right away, flicking his pierced tongue over it, over and over, the vibrations and the heat of his muscle making it better than any vibrator your could ever buy. Wave after wave of pleasure hits you, practically blinding you, as he begins to suck right at your clit. You can’t see his face with Eren working at your breasts, but you can feel the vibrations of a guttural groan rippling through your skin. It’s been barely a few minutes since Kruger’s face made contact with your heat, and already your head is thrown back, your throat raked with a sob. Your hand makes its way to Kruger’s hair, and you take a fistful of it, demanding that he stays flush with your cunt.
The gesture makes him chuckle. He pulls away from your clit, though only a couple centimeters at best, since your grip on him is fierce. His grip is tight too, his fingers digging into your thighs, holding them apart in front of him. You’re barely getting into the first scene, and already you can feel how you’ll wake up with bruises.
“You like it when I suck on that greedy little cunt?” He asks you, a teasing tilt to his voice, though it’s so deep and alluring you know his words ring true.
“Yes, Daddy–want more,” is all you can say, as your hand attempts to bring him closer to your pussy. But instead, one of Kruger’s hands releases your thighs and lands a harsh smack on your clit with his palm. It makes you jolt, sucking in a harsh gasp of air. Eren takes hold of the thigh that Kruger let go of, and brings it higher, closer to your chest. You know from the script that Eren’s supposed to join Kruger at eating you out, but Eren takes his time getting there.
Kruger spits right on your hole, though you’re so wet that his action wasn’t necessary. But it’s not about getting you wet – it’s about the way he wants to show you that he owns you. You eagerly take what he gives you, groaning as he takes his fingers and stuffs your cunt with his saliva. Eren’s serving as a bit of a distraction, lowering himself to position his head next to his brother’s. He’s kissing your thigh, nipping at it and grazing the skin with his tongue. Each brother is holding one of your thighs open now, and with Kruger fingering you and Eren’s kisses trailing higher up your thigh, you want more.
“Fuck me,” are the words that slip out of your mouth, and whether its a exhale of pleasure, a command to the two men touching you right now, or whether its a plea – you’re not sure.
Eren improvises, responding with, “Oh, we plan on it.”
Kruger then adds, “But you’re gonna squirt on us first, baby girl. Give us a taste of that sweet fucking cum.”
With that, they’re both on you now – Eren’s tongue flicking across your sensitive clit, Kruger’s teasing at your hole, the brother’s faces so close they’re fighting for space between your legs. It has your entire body on fire: your toes curling, your two hands holding onto their heads for support, your back arching up and your head thrown back into the pillows. You wanted more, but now this is so intense, they way they’re both lapping at you like they’re going to consume you. You already feel like you’re going to cum and they’ve barely touched you.
“Feels good?” Eren asks you, tongue tracing circles around your sensitive nub.
“Oh my god,” you whine, eyes rolling back as Eren sucks on your clit and Kruger’s tongue, piercing still vibrating like its a fucking sex toy, fucks your hole and teases your lips. Your body wants to shudder, to rock against their tongues, but Eren’s free hand comes up to hold down your stomach and lock you in place. It makes their motions all that more intense, that they’re pressing their tongues against you and you can’t even back away.
“I’m-I’m gonna cum,” you choke out between your moans, the coil in the pit of your stomach winding up so quickly and so tightly, orgasm approaching the fastest it’s ever come at you in your life. Your hands come down to tangle in their hair, one hand on each brother’s crown, and Eren can’t help but moan against your heat as you tug on his roots. The sound of your voice, so full of lust and sex, has him growing hard in his pants. Kruger and Eren both pick up the pace, eager to make you cum under the movement of their tongues.
You’re so so close. “Daddy, please, let me cum,” you beg, trying your best to stop the incoming orgasm, only because you know if you cum without permission, Kruger won’t be pleased.
He pulls away only long enough to give you a command, a single word that pushes you over the edge.
“Cum.”
And you do, the pressure in your body finding its release in the form of you squirting onto both brothers, juice coating their pretty faces as you buck your hips and your body spasms with tremors. Your hands come back down to your sides. Kruger’s the first to release his mouth’s hold on you, smirking as he says, “God damn.” He wipes his face with his sleeve, and looks over at his brother. Eren is still licking at your clit, slower now, helping you come down from that intense orgasm. Kruger’s hand comes to the back of Eren’s head, pushing him into your cunt.
“You clean her up. I’m gonna fuck her throat.”
You’re still reeling, gasping for air and leaning into Eren’s mouth. He takes the opportunity, now that it’s just the two of you while Kruger makes his way around the bed, to press his tongue between your folds, licking a stripe up between them, lapping up your release into his mouth. He groans, a low ‘mmm’, the taste still so sweet. He speaks in a hushed voice, just low enough for you to hear, “You taste so fucking good, baby.”
You both make eye contact, and for a second you want to feel like you’re the only two in the room again. He finally removes his mouth just as you’re starting to feel overstimulated and beginning to whimper. You almost share a smile. Almost want to tell him how good that was and how amazing his mouth felt on you.
But you’re taken out of the moment by the sound of the leash clipping onto the center ring of your collar. You look up, and it’s Kruger standing by the side of the bed, looking down at you with the leash wrapped around his fist. Every hair on your body stands at attention, the afterglow of your high all but wiped away in the blink of an eye.
“Up, bitch. Hands and knees.”
He tugs on the leash, pulling your neck up and off the mattress, as you shuffle your body until you’re on all fours. You look up at him as he pulls harder, squeezing the collar around your throat. Your eyes water but you hold in the urge to choke. There’s no sign from you to stop, and Kruger takes that as his cue to continue.
“Open,” he says. You don’t look back at him, but you feel Eren’s hands on your ass. Eren’s standing on his knees between your legs behind you, watching as you obediently open your mouth for his brother. He’s not sure what to call his feelings, the way his organs feel like they’re ready to crawl right out of his throat. He wishes he could go back to the video just the two of you shot. It was fun, it was light-hearted. Romantic, even. Nothing about this is romantic and he hates it.
“Aren’t you going to thank me for letting you cum, baby? Have a taste.”
Kruger leans down and spits into your open mouth. You can do nothing but swallow.
“Thank you,” you croak out your reply, voice hoarse because of the tightness around your throat. He still hasn’t let go of your leash, and you’re feeling light headed from the lack of air.
Kruger slaps you again, the corner of his lips perking up as you whimper. You wonder if Eren’s brother is the devil incarnate as he spits out, “Thank you?”
“Thank you, daddy.”
He mockingly soothes your cheek that he just slapped, skin still tingling. He gives it a single tap. “Good girl. Open up for daddy.”
The two men take a moment to unbutton their pants, cocks hard within the confines of their briefs. You turn your head to look back at Eren, and he’s giving you a questioning look. Are you okay? He seems to ask with his eyes. You offer him a simple nod and the tiniest semblance of a smile. But Kruger’s having none of that.
He tugs on your leash again, bringing your face right up to his cock. His pants and briefs hang at his mid-thighs. His cock is enormous, and you wonder how the hell it’s going to fit down your throat.
Kruger catches you staring, and with a smirk he whispers, “Scared?”
In truth, you were, just a little. You’ve seen a lot of dicks, and Eren was big by porn star standards, but his brother? God really does have his favorites. And it was obvious the Jaeger brothers were no exception.
To stick with your role in the video, you swallow your fear and bring back your teasing, defiant demeanor. “I can take it daddy.”
“Don’t disappoint me.” He taps the head of his cock against your cupid’s bow, precum staining your lips. You open your mouth and swirl your tongue around his head, flushed a pretty pink and throbbing with need.
While you begin sucking on Kruger’s tip, Eren’s bringing his up and down your folds behind you. With one hand gripping your ass, and the other at the base of his cock, he teases your still-sensitive clit, causing you to moan right around Kruger. It sends vibrations up his skin and through his body. You can hear Eren’s voice as he mumbles, “God, you’re so wet.” And when Eren finally begins to push himself into you? You’re mewling, hands gripping tight onto the sheets below you as you clench around him.
Eren sighs, his cock inside you feeling like heaven on earth. “Taking me so well,” he says, a thumb tracing circles on your hip, “Can feel you squeezing my cock, baby.”
Kruger gives you a devilish grin. “You like being stuffed with cock, don’t you, whore?”
“Mhm,” you can’t reply with anything but a hum as he begins to push his cock further into your mouth, holding your throat steady by the leash, his other hand coming to the back of your neck. It’s as if the brothers are synchronized, both their cocks pushing their way into your body at once.
“Fuck, it’s tight,” Eren says between clenched teeth. His hands grip your ass cheeks, spreading them apart as he watches his cock sink into you. He’s not just saying this for the video — your walls are clamping down on him so tight he fears he’ll cum and ruin the shot.
Kruger agrees with his brother, with a breathy, “Shit, take it, take this cock down your fucking throat,” as your mouth moves further and further down his shaft. It feels good for him, the way your hot tongue glides up the throbbing vein on the underside, the way your red lips enclose his shaft, the way your throat is so tight around him. It all feels good.
You feel so impossibly full when they’re both inside you to the hilt. Kruger’s looking down at you, your eyes watering as you breathe through your nose, while Eren’s eyes dance between where you’re connected and up at you and Kruger. He’s waiting for Kruger to start as planned.
But Kruger turns up to his brother and says, “ihre handgelenke, bruder.”
My…hands? You wonder what he’s talking about.
“Your wrists,” Eren translates.
You feel Eren reach up over your body and capture both your wrists in his hands, pulling them back. You’re no longer supporting your weight, relying solely on Eren to pull you back so you don’t fall forward. And then you hear a clinking sound. He joins together the clamps on your wrists, effectively acting as handcuffs behind your back. You pull them slightly but they’re tight, you can’t move your wrists. Eren holds both your wrists in one hand, and slaps your ass with the other.
Eren thinks to himself: You’ve shot so many porn videos… You can do this Eren. They want you to be rough. You can be rough, dammit.
Eren pulls on your wrists, arching your back and pulling your ass back onto him. Then, Kruger pulls you forward by your leash, ramming his cock further down your throat. You can’t believe this position you’re in, being pulled back and forth by the twins onto their cocks like this. It has you whimpering as your body jolts back and forth, back onto Eren’s cock, then forward to Kruger’s pelvis. You’re being treated like nothing but a cocksleeve.
There’s tears stinging your eyes, sweat coating your face, mascara and eyeshadow running down your cheeks. Your lipstick smears as Kruger fucks your throat with no mercy, his cock impossibly far in, his balls slapping your chin. He’s spewing curse words at you, calling you a whore, a cockslut, a bitch – every degrading word you could ever think of. You can barely breathe, between the leash on your throat and Kruger’s cock in your mouth.
Yet, Eren’s fucking you from behind exactly how you like it. He doesn’t start slow either, instead matching Kruger’s pace with forceful thrusts of his hips slapping against your ass. It has you moaning and squeezing your eyes shut, you want to scream but you can’t, not with the older brother fucking your throat like this. Eren’s shooting you words of praise, though low enough only for you to hear. Your moans against his cock pick up the pace, and Kruger pulls out for a moment, letting you catch your breath. You’re panting, your body threatening to fall over save for Eren holding you up by your wrists.
Kruger’s index finger hooks under your chin, tilting you up to face him, your body rocking forward with each of Eren’s thrusts. He looks down at you with that condescending look, your face so utterly fucked out, makeup a mess and tears streaming down your face.
“I thought you said you could take it, baby girl?” Eren groans loudly as you squeeze around him at the sound of Kruger’s deep voice, “But you’re crying, making a whole fucking mess.”
You whimper as Eren slaps your ass once more, his thrusts so forceful your face almost crashes into Kruger’s pelvis. Kruger’s hand that was on your chin comes up to your lips, and he sticks a thumb past them, opening your jaw and pressing down on your tongue.
“We’ll make a bigger mess of your face then, hm? Paint it with my cum, how would you like that?”
He stuffs his fingers in your mouth as far as they will go as you nod. He pulls them out, a trail of saliva connecting your lips to his digits. He wipes it off on your chin, and a sob escapes your throat as Eren continues to fuck you, his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you and his balls slapping your clit with every thrust.
“Ahh fuck–Eren, I’m–”
“Gonna cum all over my cock?” He asks you, pulling tighter on your bound wrists as he continues to ram into you, over and over.
You part your lips, another moan perched in the back of your throat ready for release, but before you can make another sound Kruger again fills your mouth with his cock. It’s painted red with your lipstick, and soaked with your saliva. He thrusts into your throat, and it tightens in tandem with you squeezing Eren’s cock. Eren knows you’re about to cum, he can feel the way your body’s tensing up and your walls are contracting. You’re almost there, when Kruger surprises you both.
In a move that was certainly not on the script, he pulls Eren in closer by the back of the neck. You can barely believe your eyes when you look up and see that he kisseshis brother. Eren’s surprised too, for a moment, but he knows this is for the video, and plays along. They’re making out right above your back, Eren angling your chest up just a bit higher, his cock buried impossibly deep. You’re groaning around Kruger’s cock as Eren kisses him back just as roughly as Kruger captured his lips. When they part, Kruger pushes two of his fingers into Eren’s open mouth and down his throat. He stutters, choking around his brother’s fingers, but he continues to pound into you. His grip on your ass is tight as he coughs and grits out the singular word, “Fuck.”
Kruger pulls harshly on your leash, constricting your airway once more, and you close your eyes as you feel your peak approaching. Eren’s merciless behind you, switching to powerful thrusts that lurch you forward, so far that each thrust has him pulling out to the tip, only to pull you back down to the hilt. You want to sob and cry, you’ve never been fucked so hard like this, but Kruger’s cock in your throat suffocates you. You can only react by clamping down hard on Eren’s dick, your coil wound so tight you think your whole body will explode when you cum.
Kruger can see that you’re about to cum, and decides to elevate your experience further. He plugs your nose with his fingers, and at this point you literally cannot breathe. Your eyes are blown wide as you look up at him, and you feel so lightheaded you don’t know if you’ll pass out before this is over.
“Fuck, she’s gonna cum,” Eren says, feelings your walls fluttering around his cock. It feels so good, he throws his head back in ecstasy, curse words rolling off his tongue.
“Go ahead and cum,” Kruger tells you, “Cum on my brother’s cock like a good little whore, baby.”
You can’t hold back any longer, your vision turning white as you cum on Eren’s length. What would have been pathetic whimpers are swallowed by Kruger’s cock in your mouth, and you can only give a muffled “mmm!” as your cum leaks down your thighs and coats Eren’s cock, spurt coating the sheets below you. Your mind is hazy as you are on the verge of passing out, but it only makes your orgasm all that more intense.
Kruger finally releases you, letting go of your nose and removing his cock from your throat. Eren undoes the connection between your wrists, and you bring your hands down to the bed to hold up your heaving chest before you can pathetically crash face-first into the mattress. Eren pulls out, despite how hard you were milking him and how badly he wants to cum inside you, because this scene isn’t supposed to end that way.
Instead, as you’re helplessly coughing and catching your breath, covered in your slick, tears, smudged makeup, and sweat, Eren joins his brother on the edge of the bed right in front of your face. Both of them stand before you, cocks glistening wet, right before your lips.
You sit on your weak knees, blinking back tears, looking up at them. Without a word you bring a hand to each of their cocks, pumping their shafts with your fist. You bring Eren’s cock to your mouth, just the tip while you fist his shaft. He was already so close to cumming inside you earlier, that he begins to rut his hips into you. He can’t help but whine out a “Fuck, baby,” while he leans into your touch. He holds in his orgasm as best he can, to cum at the same time as his brother. You release him from your mouth and bring your thumb over his slit, teasing him.
With Kruger it’s not as obvious that he’s near his peak, but you can see in the way his body tenses, and hear the low curses coming from his lips, that he’s close too. You take Kruger’s cock into your mouth again, sucking on the tip as you pump the base with your fist.
“You want us to cum on your face?” He asks, and his voice has an edge to it. You know from his videos that’s how it sounds when he’s about to cum. He poses his words as a question but he already knows the answer to it.
“Yes, daddy,” you reply as you release his cock from your mouth, looking up at both men towering above you. “Want your cum on my tongue,” you beg for their seed as you stick out your tongue.
You switch between their cocks in your mouth a second time, earning the most sinful moans from each brother, but you release them before they can cum in your mouth. With a few more furious pumps of your hands, and groans coming from the two brothers, they cum together on your face, thick ropes of white painting your skin. In regards to this, for once both twins are the same–they cum a lot, in several loads that drip down your cheeks, coat your tongue and even spill down your breasts and onto your knees. You slow down the movements of your fists as the last of their cum coats your hands. You show them your tongue, coated white with their release.
“Fuck, so good,” Eren says between breaths. He watches, still reeling, as Kruger reaches out to you.
“Show us how badly you wanted our cum,” Adds Kruger, hooking a finger under your jaw to close it.
You swallow all the cum that was on your tongue, the action of swallowing hurting your raw throat. You blink harshly but otherwise stay silent, opening your mouth and sticking out your tongue to show them. Behind them you can see the cameraman filming you, and the sight brings you back to earth, because this whole time you’d almost forgotten you were even filming.
Kruger silently pats your cheek in acknowledgement, and Eren reaches to smooth down your hair.
“Good girl.”
Off-screen, Zeke yells, “Cut!”
The three of you turn to him as the cameras shut off, and Zeke looks at the three of you incredulously. The twins zip up their pants while you’re still naked on the bed, too shocked by the scene you just filmed to even move.
“Holy shit,” is all he says, looking between his step-brothers and you, your face completely fucked-out. “That was insane.”
You lie back against the bed and Eren comes over to your side.
“Are you okay?” He asks, worry stitching his brows together and causing a slight frown to marr his features.
“Just give me five minutes,” you sigh, laying back against the bed and staring at the ceiling. Your only thought, as Eren grabbed a nearby bottle of water for you, and Kruger walked away with a smirk on his lips, was: Fuck, we still have two more scenes.
The second scene starts out quite differently than the first.
Fandom: Attack on Titan Pairing: Eren x Reader Words:4k
Warnings: Season 4 spoilers (namely for Part 1), canon divergence, Reader is a Titan Shifter, open discrimination against Eldians and Paradis, blood and violence, references to depression and coping with PTSD, disregard for said PTSD, mentions of past romantic feelings (which may or may not be reciprocated and/or still strong in the present tense)
A/N: I’m *finally* back with another chapter, woohoo! I’m sorry this came out later than I originally intended. Right now I’m a bit preoccupied with writing my Levi/OC fic, so that’s taking most of my time when I’m not working on this story. I’m almost done with Part 5 but I might wait to post it until I have the majority of Part 6 written out, just so I’m not rushing myself. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this chapter! It’s a bit of a slower one, but it gives (in my opinion anyway) a little bit of a break from the events of the last couple chapters. If you want to be added to the taglist, let me know and I’ll include you! (And if I forgot to tag anyone I’m incredibly sorry!)
The first thing you notice when you open your eyes is how cold the air is. Musty, damp, the scent of dirt strong against your nose. Your back is stiff, your shoulder hurts like hell.
You reach up and touch your forehead. At least the cut has healed.
A single lantern hangs in the corner of the room—on the other side of a set of steel bars. A prison cell, you realize with a shiver. Probably in the underground dungeons, directly below Mitras. Or at least, one of the districts of Wall Sina.
But why? Why are you still alive?
You don’t remember much after passing out. You remember falling in and out of sleep, hearing all kinds of voices speaking around you, none of them saying words that made any sense. You remember feeling cold, hard bands around your wrists, but when you glance down at them, you can’t see anything. You’re not chained to the wall or tied up or handcuffed in any way. Just trapped in a prison cell underground.
A cage, and you almost laugh bitterly.
There’s no one outside the cage, not even a couple of guards to keep watch. Why not? Even if the Scouts brought you back to Paradis and kept you alive as their prisoner, why wouldn’t they at least make sure you were being watched?
Never mind that. You can break out of this cell at any time, with the War Hammer’s power. Just one flick of your wrist and—
The gentle sound of footsteps echo through the hall. You sit up in the bed (the only piece of furniture in the cell, minus the sink and toilet) and watch as the newcomer steps into the light.
Your chest aches when you see Commander Hanji Zoë, staring at you through the bars of the cell with her one good eye.
You haven’t seen her since the day you left Paradis. Since the day the Scouts found out about the outside world. She’s changed in the last four years—not just her hairstyle, but that familiar glow of laughter in her eyes is gone. You faintly remember losing Moblit in the battle for Shiganshina; losing him must’ve been a huge blow for her.
She sighs softly, before leaning against the wall directly across your cell. She’s dressed in a familiar green overcoat that reaches down to her knees, with the Wings of Freedom sewn over the chest pocket and sleeves. You remember wearing those wings once, and actually being proud of them.
The memory makes you want to cry.
“Why did you keep me alive?”
Hanji hangs her head. “It was Eren’s idea.”
Your temples start to pound with a headache. Wasn’t Eren going to eat you back in Marley? Use the Jaw Titan’s teeth to crush your Titan’s crystal to pieces and steal the War Hammer Titan from you? It makes no sense for him to want to bring you back to Paradis alive, rather than devouring you right there on the battlefield. He must know of the danger you pose to Paradis and the rest of its citizens; in fact, all of the Scouts should know that by now. So why bring you back with them in the first place?
“It’s been a while,” Hanji says weakly, offering you a slight smile. Not like the ones she’s given you in the past, full of hope and pride and affection. “How’ve you been?”
Your gaze drops to the ground. Why is she asking you something like this? You don’t know how to respond, so you simply shrug your shoulders at her.
“I see…” She sighs again and sinks to the ground in a sitting position. You follow suit, the ends of your festival dress brushing against the steel bars. “Eren told me what happened that day…after you left.”
Of course he did. You cross your arms against your knees, hugging them to your chest. Hanji takes your silence as a sign to continue—and honestly, the sound of her voice is somewhat soothing, even after all this time.
“It didn’t make sense at first, why you would leave with them. We didn’t suspect you with Reiner and the others, when the Female Titan attacked for the first time. You never gave us any reason to suspect you; we never had a Titan to link you to.” She laughs a little at that part, and suddenly you’re reminded of her love for Titans beyond the Walls, and you wonder if she still has that wild spark inside of her somewhere. “You insisted you didn’t know anything, even when we questioned you about it. You’re a very capable liar, I suppose.”
Liar, hero, heir, traitor. So many words have been used to describe you over the years, and not a single one of them were false.
“You never interfered with our plans to attack the Armored and Colossal Titans in Shiganshina, nor did you stop us from trying to take on the Beast Titan. And yet…you never shared any of your intel with us. Never helped us with our strategies, never warned us of what the enemy could do next.”
“There was nothing to share,” you mumble into the crook of your arm. “You figured it out pretty fast, Commander.”
She scoffs at the title. “Maybe so, but we could’ve used your help. Maybe we could’ve saved a few lives, back in Shiganshina.”
You know instantly she’s thinking of Moblit. Of Erwin, the previous Commander of the Survey Corps, and the countless other Scouts who perished on that day. Is their blood on your hands, as well?
“Still,” she continues, “you left with them in the end. Even after you told the Beast Titan you wouldn’t.”
So why?
Suddenly, you want to tell her everything. The possibility of seeing Fine again, the tarnished reputation of your family’s name, the promise of glory upon returning to Marley—and even the pain that grew in your chest that day, with every passing moment, until you finally said goodbye to Eren in the middle of the night.
But what good will come of it? Who is she to have pity on you, especially at a time like this? To someone like you, who’s killed more Scouts and civilians both directly and indirectly, thanks to your involvement with Marley? Who sat by and watched as your fellow Scouts struggled to understand the concept of intelligent Titans, to even consider the possibility of Titan Shifters in the first place. You, who could’ve played a huge role in bringing glory to Paradis and the rest of humanity on the island, saving at least a hundred lives in the process…
But you didn’t. You were a bystander until the end—until you ran home like a coward, seeking refuge across the sea.
“Listen,” Hanji finally says, and your head jerks up at her voice, “I’m well aware that you were probably in the same boat as Reiner. You were mostly likely forced to do Marley’s bidding without any will of your own. So I don’t blame you for that. However,” there’s an edge to her voice now, “the same cannot be said for the way you abandoned us. After so many years of fighting against Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie…why would you go back to them at the very end?”
You reach down and start to pick at a loose thread of your skirt, the frayed ends barely clinging to the fabric. Hanji’s staring at you intently now, silently demanding an answer from you.
You have no business obeying her; she’s not your Commander anymore.
And yet, you find yourself mumbling out, “Because I couldn’t bear to stay here.”
For the first time in all the years you’ve known her, Hanji is stunned to silence. Slowly, you raise yourself off the ground and dust off the skirt of your dress, meeting her gaze and struggling to keep calm.
“You already know I’m a Tybur. One of the most influential Eldian families within Marley. I was selected to carry the burden of the War Hammer Titan and use it to steal the Founder away from the citizens of Paradis. But once we actually started that mission…” Tears cling to your eyelashes, threatening to drip down your cheeks. “…I realized that it couldn’t be done. We were kids, Hanji. I was a kid. And I didn’t want to answer for Marley’s sins anymore!”
Your head is pounding something fierce now, electric jolts flooding your veins. You can feel your Titan surging forward at the fury, but you will it to stay back and contain itself. There’s no use in breaking out now and running the risk of possibly killing Hanji. Not when she’s shown a bit of mercy towards you.
“So I played dumb. I didn’t want anything to do with Reiner or Bertholdt, so I pretended to be one of you. I wanted to forget about Marley and just pretend I was an Eldian. None of you knew you were Eldians, good or bad…you were just people! And I wanted to be a part of that.”
Everything comes crashing down on you at once. Training with the 104th cadets, acting like the kids you were. Sharpening your blades just in time to defend the city of Trost, when the Colossal Titan mysteriously appeared once more. Battling Annie in Stohess District in her Titan form, and solidifying your loyalty to the Scouts and Paradis—and watching the sick betrayal wallow up in her Titan’s eyes at the realization.
Everything else from that moment on followed suit: your rejection of Reiner and Bertholdt, your determination to defend Eren and Historia, and your refusal to return home in the end with Reiner and Zeke. Only, you had betrayed that sense of loyalty to the Scouts, as well as Paradis. You had abandoned them when they needed you the most, damning your name on the island of devils.
“Zeke found me and Eren, after the battle. He said my family wanted me to come home, and I thought of my cousin—she’s more like a sister now, and the other kids… They were still waiting for me to come home! And I didn’t want to leave them without at least saying goodbye first! But…I never found the chance to come back, like I planned…”
It wasn’t as though you’d be welcomed back with open arms, anyway. From the way Eren looked at you that night, green eyes filled with tears, angry red Titan marks etched on his skin… You knew you would never be allowed to return to this island alive.
So then…why was it Eren who insisted on bringing you back with him?
An unsettling silence forms between the two of you. Hanji clears her throat and leans against the wall again, while you rest your forehead on the cold steel bars. Your Titan’s energy has died a little, the thrumming less pronounced beneath your skin. At least you’re in control again, you remind yourself. But it doesn’t do anything to lessen the pain in your chest.
“…You always did seem a little out of place with them.” You glance up at Hanji, who manages to smile at you through the bars of the cell. “With Reiner and Bertholdt, I mean. You always seemed to fit so well with Eren and Armin and Mikasa.”
…I did? You never thought of yourself as one of them, even before learning about Eren’s Attack Titan ability. You never deemed yourself worthy enough to be considered as part of their group, no matter how much Eren insisted you were.
“Also,” she adds, with a sly smile stretching across her face, “you were attached to the hip with Eren. I’m surprised Mikasa never got jealous of you, honestly.”
Words that intend to bring up a happy memory, maybe even a sense of longing for the past. But instead you sink to your knees in the dirt of your cell, wrapping your arms around your upper half. The tears come hard and fast, cascading down your cheeks like little rivers.
You don’t want to live in Marley. You don’t want to go back to that horrible place.
You don’t want to stay in Paradis with the people you betrayed. The people who treated you as one of their own for the longest time.
You don’t want to be stuck in this endless war anymore. A cycle of hate that keeps on living, two different kinds of people always clawing at each other’s throats. You don’t want to be a pawn in their game anymore.
You don’t want to be the head of the Tybur family. You don’t want to use the power of the War Hammer Titan, not even to break yourself out of this damned cell.
You don’t want to fall asleep at night, thinking of the countless people you’ve murdered over the years. You don’t want to scrape your hands raw beneath the running water every time you visit the washroom, trying so hard to clean the blood off your skin, even when you can’t see it anymore. You can still feel it, no matter how many times you wash them off—you don’t want to feel it anymore.
All you want is to spend the last four years of your life with the green-eyed boy you used to love, in the little cabin at the heart of an unknown forest, just as you’ve always dreamed about.
Eren Jaeger. After all these years, you’re still in love with Eren Jaeger.
Hanji watches you from the other side of the bars, awkwardly shifting her weight from one foot to the other. The Hanji from before, the one who didn’t know you were part of Marley’s Warrior Unit yet, would sink to her knees alongside you and pull you close to her chest for a hug.
But you don’t expect her to do anything like that; not when she knows you can kill her at any second.
Still, she doesn’t leave without saying a few more words: “This cell is beneath Stohess District, just so you know. You won’t do much good trying to break out—so please, try not to do so.”
You barely have the strength to nod as she turns away and disappears down the hall. Only when you hear the heavy door slam shut do you bury your face into your hands, sobbing uncontrollably as the War Hammer’s power thrums to life beneath your skin.
“How is she faring, doctor?”
You can hear the man’s voice on the other side of the door, soft and gentle as he speaks to your aunt. “A little shaken up, but she’ll be fine. I suggest you give her some time, though. God only knows what she’s seen over there.”
Over there. On the other side of the sea, on the island of devils.
“But I wouldn’t worry,” the doctor continues, and you can just imagine him shaking his head. “She’s a strong girl. She’ll get through it eventually.”
“I hope so.” You can hear your aunt sigh, and your hands curl into fists on your lap. “She’ll forget about the time spent over there, I’m sure. It must’ve been hard for her, surrounded by so many devils. Pretending to be one of them.”
But you are one of them. Whether you live on one side of the sea or the other, they’re all the same. They share the same blood of the devil, the same curse they were born with.
But it won’t do you any good to point that out to your aunt. As caring and understanding that she can be, she has little tolerance for talk about the Eldians living on the other side of the ocean. Those are the cursed Eldians, while the ones in Marley (like your own family’s bloodline) are the honored ones. The ones blessed to live in a place like Marley to begin with. The ones that can travel freely throughout the nation, and not just trapped within the gates of Liberio.
The ones not confined by a cage.
But it still feels as though you’re in one.
So you snap your lips shut and wait for your aunt to finish talking to the doctor. You’ll go along with whatever treatment they have planned for you, to help you with the nightmares and episodes. It’ll be better for everyone if you don’t mention anything from that damned island at all, much less the devils living there. The last thing you want is to upset Fine and the other children with horrible talk like that.
They are the devils, you remind yourself, over and over again as the months crawl by. They are the devils of the world. It’s their fault we’re in this mess to begin with.
But in the dead of night, curled up in your bed with nothing but the shadows to keep you company, you can feel the tears slipping down your cheeks, as the memories come flooding back, one by one.
They are all devils—but so are we.
So am I.
The days pass by slowly. You remain in your cell, offered meager meals and water twice every single day from a pair of guards. But then you’re left to your own devices once more, staring at the lone lantern hanging from the corner of the cell.
Hanji comes to visit you a few more times. You half-expect her to drag Captain Levi down here with her one of these days, just so he can beat the living hell out of you for your betrayal. You wouldn’t be surprised—you just aren’t exactly looking forward to it. But he doesn’t visit you.
Neither does Eren. Although, you don’t really expect him to, at this point.
Armin visits you one day, and at first you almost don’t recognize him. His hair is cut shorter than you remember, styled in an undercut, and his eyes have lost that hopeful blue luster. But he still tries to smile at you, when he greets you from the other side of your cell.
“I think I get it, now,” he mumbles, as the two of you take a seat on either side of the bars. “Why you guys did what you did…on that day.”
The day Wall Maria fell…the day Shiganshina fell to the Titans. The memories make you shudder.
Of course, Armin would try to understand you. He was always the most empathetic, forming a bond with you at the first opportunity. The two of you always had a special connection, nowhere near as emotional and intimate as the one you shared with Eren, but something else entirely. Something else that was still just as special to you. Throughout your years on Paradis, you never once regretted meeting Armin Arlert.
You ask him the same question you asked Hanji, and he answers you with downcast eyes: “Eren thought you could be useful to our cause—that’s why he managed to convince Commander Hanji and Captain Levi to keep you down here.”
You can only scoff and shake your head. “Then why was he prepared to kill me back then, in Liberio? He was going to take the War Hammer Titan for himself…so why didn’t he do it when he had the chance?”
Armin sighs in defeat, lowering his head to the dirt below. “I…I think he might still have a soft spot for you.”
Nowthat is completely unrealistic. Armin’s usually smarter than this—has he hit his head or something?
There’s no way in hell Eren Jaeger has a soft spot for you. Not after everything you’ve put him through. Not after you left him in the middle of the forest that night, angry tears streaming down his cheeks, fists rigid against the collar of your shirt. You remember it all too well, and even after all this time, the swirl of guilt has never left your stomach.
You wonder if he wants to kill you himself, once this is all over.
“He hates me,” you spit out, “I’m sure of it. You heard about what happened that night, didn’t you? How I left him and the Survey Corps behind?” To go back to Reiner and Zeke, so we could escape back to Marley?
“He told us,” Armin replies without missing a beat, “but I’m sure you had your reasons. You were probably threatened, weren’t you? You probably still have a family over there…”
His voice trails off awkwardly at the mention of them. Anger sears through your veins as you remember your uncle, broken and bloody as the Attack Titan swallowed him whole. Your uncle, who planned to die before the night was up, leaving the rest of his family behind to pave the way for Marley’s survival.
“It doesn’t matter anymore,” you growl, pressing your palms into the dirt. “It’s not like I’m ever going to see them again. I’m not making it out of this cell, am I?”
Armin opens his mouth to object…then snaps it shut soon after. He heaves another sigh, and you know right then and there, that you’re not walking away from Paradis any time soon.
“They’re still deciding on what to do with you,” he finally breaks the silence. “Either to keep you as a prisoner or give the War Hammer to another soldier…or maybe to Eren himself.”
You squeeze your eyes shut. Of course, that would be their plan. Eren tried to do the same thing in Liberio, so why not just help him along and—
“But he refused.”
“…What?”
“He said he didn’t want your Titan. He didn’t want its power…at least, not yet. So I guess that buys you a little more time in here.”
He doesn’t…want to inherit the War Hammer Titan? It makes no sense—why would he try to devour you back in Liberio, but not do it now, when you’re weakened and incapable of fighting back? Now is the perfect opportunity to take the War Hammer from you, and he’s just throwing it away like it’s nothing.
“But why wouldn’t he take it for himself? And don’t say it’s because he has a soft spot,” your lip curls at those final words, and Armin winces beneath your gaze. “There has to be another reason.”
Armin clears his throat before rising from his seat. He brushes the dirt off his coat, blue eyes fixed on you the entire time.
“I suppose you can ask him that yourself. But if you want my opinion,” he smiles weakly, and for a moment you see a flash of the mischievous boy you once knew inside the Walls, his eyes the color of the sea’s salty waves, “I don’t think he’s completely let go of the past.”
What does he mean by that? Does Eren still despise you for betraying the Scouts, for leaving Paradis for Marley in the dead of night? For breaking his heart after you made him promise to live with you once the war was over? For giving him false hope that you could lead a somewhat normal life once the Titans were defeated in the battle for Shiganshina?
Or…is there something else to Armin’s words, something he’s not outright telling you? Is it possible that Eren, even after all this time and everything you made him suffer through, still looks at you and sees the young girl from the 104th Training Corps? The one who made him smile and held back his arm when he threatened to fight with Jean, the one that bared her blades at a moment’s notice, ready to protect him alongside Mikasa? The one he shared a silly tavern room with the night before the battle, the one he promised to live together with once this damn war was over?
Maybe Armin’s right, as crazy as it sounds. Maybe, after all these years, Eren still sees you as the girl he once loved.
Well, I suppose that makes two of us.
But Armin’s gone before you can ask him anything more. The heavy door slams at the end of the hall, echoing through the darkness. You turn to rest on the bed in the corner, to mull over what he’s just told you—but then you hear something else, a soft sound through the shadows.
Another pair of footsteps, closing in on the cell. You hold your breath and face the newcomer head-on, your blood singing in your veins.
Genre: Fantasy AU, romance, smut, angst, fluff, a crossover between Attack On Titan and Jujutsu Kaisen, loosely based on Game of Thrones and Eragon
Series Summary: Yuuta Okkotsu, the kind-hearted firstborn prince of the kingdom of Nymeria, finds himself stranded on an island that had been thought to only exist in legend. It is there he meets the last of the Valyrians, a dragon-blood named Eren Jaeger. While their days on the island are happy, they can’t last forever. Yuuta has a duty as prince to his kingdom that he must fulfill, and it is this duty that ultimately tears them apart.
Content Warnings: BL/Yaoi, hybrids/monsters, magic/fantasy, infidelity, power imbalances, graphic depictions of violence and death, explicit sexual content (blow job, anal sex, rimming, cunnilingus, exhibitionism, monsterfucking, 69, cum-eating, spit play, deep-throating, double penetration, sadism, masochism, blood play/consumption, choking/asphyxiation kink, handjob, drunk sex, orgy), dub-con, virginity loss, drugs (alcohol), traumatic backstories, unrequited love, yandere tropes, corruption arc, major character death
Valyria, they called it. The Island of the Dragons.
The outsiders believed it was a myth. A legend. That the tale of the beasts who once ruled the world was simply a story parents invented to put their children to sleep. No one had ever seen a dragon soaring in the sky. No one had ever had shivers running down their spines at the sounds of their bellow. No one had ever felt the heat of the blue flames that seeped through the creature’s teeth. No one had ever witnessed the glorious tale of a Rider and their Dragon. How their power reigned over the world, providing peace and serenity to their people, and how their frozen fire and bloodied desire were the ones that consumed them too in the end. No one, except the Valyrians themselves. They remembered.
The Valyrians walked upon the ground that their ancestor, the mighty dragon Balerion, built from scratch with his blood and sweat. They stood on his bones, ones that were turned to dust, and they worshiped his name, the only thing that was left of him. But the dragon magic that once streamed under his skin was inherited by every Valyrian that was born into the world. It took the shape of the delicate iridescent scales that veneered their human skin, the two jagged horns that were perched upon their heads, a tail strong enough to smother the air out of a man’s lungs, and a string of marbled teeth made of knives.
They resembled the appearance of the devils that crawled their way out from the underworld, but the Gods were merciful enough to grant them the ability to conceal every part of them that was inhuman. Once a Valyrian was old enough–strongenough–to have control over their magic, they could embrace their human parts better. They could turn their scales transparent and hide their beauty from the world. They could use their magic like an invisible veil, cloaking their horns and tail. They could appear human. They could livelike humans.
But even so, the Valyrians no longer possessed the thirst for knowledge their ancestors did. They weren’t as courageous, as fearless, and as greedy as they were. Even with blue flames dancing on their palms, they never used it to enslave other races. They were content with what their island had given them.
The outsiders, those who lived on the other side of the sea, had never seen a dragon’s wrath, only stories of it. Their incognizance could make them reckless and foolish. It could make them dangerous. Their curiosity could threaten the life of every Valyrian, fight their loyal husbands, and harm innocent children and their loving mothers. It was in their nature for humans to judge others by their appearance, and when their opponents embodied the look of a monster, it was only right for them to raise their weapons against them.
The Valyrians could tyrannize over the outsiders if they wanted to. They had the power to do so but chose not to. Yet that was not enough to convince a stranger, especially those who were already shrouded with fear. The dragon hybrids chose to avoid conflict and live a peaceful life, staying deep in the serenity the island provided them. They chose not to step outside and travel the world, no matter how beautiful they may seem, as they believed that the only living beings who thrived on the other end of the sea were monsters.
Legends are meant to be stories, their tall tales a source of wisdom and a tool for learning. But when a child believes these legends enough to stop questioning their authenticity, they become a threat to the world around them.
A bright Valyrian boy, defiant in his nature, was so consumed by his curiosity that it made him foolish. Armin was the name his father gave him, meaning heroin their language,in hopes that his son would become a savior to his kind, one that would return the peace to the island if a calamity ever arose. Little did he know that his son would be the one who would anger the Gods and bring catastrophe to their land.
A treasure chest full of clothes and jewelry was found washed ashore one day, on a beach where Armin often spent his time daydreaming about the outside world. Though they had their own preference for clothing and accessories, hybrids were always fond of shiny gemstones, but at that time, nothing caught his attention more than a leather book the size of a large stepping stone. The inside of the treasure box was dry, despite the journey full of storms and crashing waves it must have gone through before it reached his beach. The book was not ruined.
Armin flipped through the pages. The words were written in a different language but even if they weren’t, it would not have mattered. None of the Valyrians were literate as they preferred to communicate verbally. They drew on the walls and walked their fingers across the sand, but they had never invented words to be placed on parchments.
The boy landed his cerulean eyes on a set of illustrations sketched by a human’s hand. Words and languages weren’t needed to explain that he was seeing a drawing of flaming water, land made of ice, and fields of sand spreading wide as if it was endless.
Beautiful,Armin wondered, stars dancing in his eyes as they gleamed in awe. Is this what the outside world looks like?
That was how it all started. One boy, desperate to seek an answer to his question, decided to take action to fulfill his thirst. With a wooden boat he made with his talented hands, a week’s worth of food, and a breechclout made from a wolf’s fur to protect him from the wind, Armin roamed the ocean at dawn. He let the waves carry him away from the paradise he once called home, seeking another heaven that would satisfy his curiosity.
But what stood on the other side of the sea was no such thing.
It was hell on earth.
They found him the second he stepped down from his boat. The outsiders approached menacingly with javelins gripped tightly between their hands. They questioned his identity with their deep, guttural voices in a language the boy had never spoken of. The golden-haired boy cowered in fear, his sapphire eyes quivering like the crystal-like water behind him. In his frightened state, the boy lost focus on his power, and the invisible cloak around him provided by his magic, vanished. The outsiders watched him with widened eyes, faces turning pasty at the sight of his horns and tail. They didn’t find beauty in his scales.
“A d-demon,” one of them said and the boy took a step back, lost his footing, and fell onto the sand. Sea water drenched his skin, and while it usually calmed him down in the past, it only made him feel frantic. The boy tried to communicate with his gentle heart, his hands raised in surrender but they mistook it for a threat. A man, twice his size, shouted at him, his voice ringing vehemently enough to awaken the boy’s instinct to protect himself. His human eyes turned snake-like as he stretched out a hand before him, palm splayed with heat trickling from his fingertips. In the next second, blue flames materialized out of thin air.
And it burned the man into dust.
The boy was just as frightened of himself as the other males, but the humans were much faster to regain their composure. Acting on impulse, they restrained the boy with ropes that dug tortuously into his skin, threw a rag over his head, and brought him to a dungeon where they would spend hours tormenting him. They mutilated him, chopped off his hands so he wouldn’t be able to use his fire magic. Each question was answered with a wail, and once they had grown tired, the humans tried to burn him alive, wanting him to experience the same painful death that had befallen their comrade. Armin might not have been invincible to daggers, but he welcomed the heat of the flames like an old friend. He couldn’t be burned, his bones remained strong, and his skin was unscathed. At that moment, fear was no longer the only thing that swelled inside those humans’ merciless hearts. There was greed. They saw his power as a gift, and they wanted to take it for themselves.
The boy pleaded for his life and they promised him freedom if he could lead them to his home. Gullible and desperate, Armin led them back to the sea. They stopped in the middle of the ocean, their bodies weak and dehydrated. The outsiders were confused as they could see nothing but water glimmering like diamonds under the sun. There was magic shrouding the island, a protection field that prevented anyone but the Valyrians from seeing the island until they passed through it. The humans, not knowing about the invisible cloak that concealed the island, were furious, assuming that the boy had tricked them and led them astray. But then Armin stretched out his hand, and like a curtain being tugged to the side, the island appeared before their eyes.
The outsiders rejoiced. They were one step closer to getting what they wanted.
Armin, despite his willingness to cooperate, had his head detached from his neck the second they arrived on the island. That day, from daylight to nighttime, the humans wreaked havoc on their island with their spears and swords. The outside world was cold and cruel, and the humans were trained for survival and warfare. But the hybrids were nothing like them, too used to living in tranquility to be able to take the life of another. The battle was one-sided.
Humans didn’t just walk away victorious. They robbed everything they could, raped every woman, tortured every man, and murdered the elderly all in one night. They tied up the children’s hands and legs and they tossed them to the back of their boats, carrying them back to their own land so they could experiment with their powers. They ripped the scales out of their skins. They used their bodies to test their weapons. They wanted to know every bit of their weakness and steal away every bit of their strength. The children didn’t last long, dying from being unable to withstand the pain. The massacre put an end to their race. The dragons had perished, all except one.
Eren Jaeger, a nine-year-old hybrid, managed to escape the massacre at the cost of his family’s lives. He saw the way his father gasped as a javelin struck past his heart. He heard the sound of his brother’s cry as they chopped off his legs and fed his body to their hounds. He felt the way his mother embraced him with her trembling arms as she asked him to flee for his life and leave her behind.
“You have to go or they will take you away,” she urged him, her voice quavering in terror. “Run. And when you feel like you can’t run anymore, run faster. You have to live.”
“But mother–”
“Eren.” She placed her hands on his shoulders, casting him the same smile that Eren had fallen in love with from the day he was born. “You have to live so you can remember us.” She kissed his tears away but she didn’t let him do the same. She pushed her child forward, yelling, “Run!”
Eren did, without having a second to bid his goodbye. He sprinted faster than the wind, even if each stride felt like he was stepping onto shards of broken glass. He dived into the sea, and he let the tide and the storm be his shield and shelter.
And he never looked back.
***
THE BIRTH OF THE WOLVES
Nymeria was the home of the Gods. Vibrant with colors, perfused with life.
As one of the eight kingdoms that ruled the continent, its beauty stretched endlessly from the drift ice in the north sea to the mangrove jungles in the south. Petals of cherry blossom trees performed a graceful dance with the wind in the spring, while the scent of thriving bamboo permeated the air throughout the year.
The first emperor, Michizane Sugawara, built his kingdom from scratch. He was known as the Wolf of The North, due to his fierceness and loyalty. But an old lady would tell her grandchildren a different story of how he regained that title.
Michizane was only a baby who had barely learned how to smile when his people perceived him as a vessel of a vengeful spirit. He was born with an anomaly, where his eyes were blood red instead of gentle brown like his parents. From the day he breathed his first air, a deadly plague spread through the entire village, taking every newborn’s life, and sending the elderly to eternal sleep. The soothing rains turned into storms, flooding their land and destroying their paddies. The gentle breeze evolved into a hurricane and swept away their houses. They were too afraid to question the Gods and so they put the blame on a child who still craved his mother’s warmth.
On a night of the full moon, they snatched the baby away from his mother’s arms. They cast him into the woods, far away in the north, where the starving wolves roam around, searching for prey. The people sat down and prayed at the gate, not for the baby’s safety, but to offer his life to the Forest Gods, hoping that it would stop the calamity that befell their homes.
His people abandoned him, and the wolves took him into their pack. Michizane was raised in the woods and the wolves taught him their language and the meaning of family. He learned compassion. He learned how to forgive and rely on each other’s strength. Because when the snow falls and the wind blows, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives.
The catastrophe that struck the village continued long after they last listened to the sound of Michizane’s fretful cry. The people remained hungry, their children were only bones and skin. One day, a pack of wolves walked into their village with silence in their steps and glowing eyes. They were not ordinary beasts, three times the size of the wolves that guarded their woods, heavier with more massive jaws and teeth that could tear a man’s leg with a single bite. They did not fear fire. They did not fear blades. The people screamed in their helpless state, and the mothers cried as the wolves howled.
Then a man stepped in, a stranger by face but not by name, and the wolves turned as still as the dead.
“I am Michizane Sugawara,” the man said, his eyes glowing in the night like a scarlet moon but they were as gentle as the breeze that kissed his cheeks. “The man you once cast away.”
“The vengeful spirit!” a brawny man shouted, pointing his javelin at his face. A beast covered with smoke gray fur lunged forward in response, standing before Michizane like a mother wolf protecting its pup. The man took a step back, his face turned pasty at the sight of its bared teeth.
“Easy,” Michizane said, his hand stroking the direwolf’s fur, and the growling that rumbled deep within its chest turned into a soft purr. His opponent watched his every movement closely, but the one who seemed like a threat was not Michizane. It was himself.
“I am not here for revenge,” Michizane explained, grabbing the sack he carried on one shoulder and emptying its insides. Mangos and berries tumbled to the ground, rolling and knocking themselves against the peasants’ feet. The people stared in bewilderment. Where did he find these fruits? They wondered. They were certain that there was nothing left for them to harvest, as the storms had destroyed everything to the ground.
“I found them in the forest,” Michizane answered their silent question. “There is more than I can carry. Come with me. I’ll show you the path.”
The people turned their heads, staring at each other’s faces with frowns breaking on their temples. “B-but…” A lady spoke, her voice was as frail as a spiderweb. “There are… wolves in the forest.”
“Yes, there are,” Michizane responded with a smile, caressing the beast with one hand and it leaned further into his touch like a small kitten. “They’re my family.”
“Why should we trust you?” Her husband said, firmer in tone even when his knees were trembling under his weight. “What if you lead us into the forest and toss us to the wolves?”
“Because I’m not like you.” The tenderness in Michizane’s voice began to waver as his patience ran thin. “I don’t sacrifice a human’s life to save my own. I am here to give you an option. Pledge your loyalty to me and I will make sure your children could sleep with their stomachs full. Put your faith in me and I will let the wolves protect you, the way they protected me. I doubt you can survive the next winter if you remain in this state. We can survive together. We willsurvive together.”
Words alone would not be enough to suddenly turn their fear into devotion, but at least, they managed to light a flicker of flame in their hearts, enough for them to be brave. They kept their weapons and torches in their hands but they followed his trail without a word. The wolves stood on their sides, their teeth no longer bared, and they were as silent as the night itself. When they entered the forest, they were welcomed by the sight of mango trees coming into fruit, dangling tantalizingly before their eyes.
“Take as many as you wish,” Michizane said. “I will not let you starve.”
Instead of sprinting toward the trees, the villagers dropped down to their knees, their arms stretched out as they pressed their foreheads to the ground. They called upon his name, chanting it like prayer as they spoke their gratitudes. His red eyes shone in elation, happy to welcome his new family, but an innocent child pointed his hand at him. “A demon,” the child said before his mother clasped her palm against his mouth, shushing him down.
“He’s not a demon. He’s our savior.” She bowed to him. “He’s our king.”
The demon in the darkness was the answer to their prayer all along. The lost hero. The new emperor. The Wolf of The North.
Michizane brought his people together, protected them under his claws and teeth, and guided them to live a life full of love and forgiveness. The empire that started small, grew immensely over the years as more people came to seek the taste of serenity that he provided. Centuries passed by, and Nymeria remained prosperous. They said their soils were blessed by the deities, that when a man tossed a broken branch into the dirt, the earth would restore it to its glory by the next morning. Food was never scarce. Children never ran out of laughter. Men guffawed all day and mothers sang their favorite lullabies to their smiling babies. People created names for their Gods, and they chanted them in their prayers with their eyes closed and their heads bowed low enough for their skin to graze the earth.
But a thousand prayers were left unheard once a man, driven by his vanity and lust for power, claimed the throne and betrayed his ancestors’ will. The Gods stopped giving them their blessings, and they simply watched from the heavens above.
And they watched how Nymeria slowly began to rot from the inside.
Emperor Okkotsu was not born a vile man. He was just like Michizane himself. Determined. Goal-driven. Strong and courageous. A respectable man who would never lay a hand on the innocents. He wished only to preserve peace in his kingdom. The only thing that separated them was the fact that Michizane kept the turmoil in his chest buried deep behind the smile that he showcased to his people. He would rather suffer alone than bring his people to shed tears with him. Emperor Okkotsu, on the other hand, was not one to put on a facade. When he was suffused with joy, the women rejoiced in pretty clothes and the men fell asleep with smiles on their faces. When anger consumed him, he let his wrath burn everything around him. When he was swallowed by grief, the children cried in his presence.
Nymeria was an ally to every kingdom, except one: The Dricans. Known as The Golden Lions, they were powerful, fierce, and strong like the king of the jungle itself. They were one of the eight kingdoms that presided over the continent, second in strength only to the wolves. But unlike the Nymerians who were content with living within the borders of their land, the Dricans wanted more. Fueled by greed, the lions roared and the wolves perceived it as a threat.
It was the last night of winter when a Nymerian princess was captured by the Dricans. They sliced her flesh open, destroyed her honor, and sent back her corpse to her brother, the king himself. The Dricans sent their regards, a message strapped to her casket said. The Emperor remained muted but the direwolves howled. And the world watched with bated breath as he took his revenge.
The diplomatic acts between the two kingdoms did not work as the Emperor was determined to make Drican pay for their sins. Insulted by his act, they decided to settle it for good. Yuuta Okkotsu, his firstborn, witnessed the terror that the Dricans spread throughout their lands from the spaces between his mother’s fingers. Drican invaded their home at the break of dawn, burning down their fields and tainting their crystal lakes with shades of crimson. Though shocked by the sudden aggression, Nymerians were strong enough to put up a fight.
The war between the two dynasties lasted for the entire summer. Blood of Nymerian warriors pooled and dried on the ground, their skins scorched by the blazing sun, frozen when the night kissed them goodbye. Many innocent lives were taken away. A widow’s wail echoed through the night, and the fireflies went silent as they mourned her husband’s death. The Emperor was running out of options. He couldn’t win without a new source of power. And in his desperate need, his advisor whispered in his ear.
There was a rumor, he said, that a witch lived somewhere in a forested ravine in the rugged mountain that stood a hundred miles away from the palace. A lady with ginger hair and a smile wicked enough to spread goosebumps on a man’s skin. Nobara, they called her, a strange name for a strange woman, but the Emperor wanted her more than he longed to feast on a wild boar. He sent twelve brave men to take her captive. Only five of them returned, dragging the witch behind them like cattle.
The Emperor asked her to create a spell, one that would grant him an immense amount of power. He informed her that it was necessary for him to protect his realm, to give his people the peaceful life they desired, just like in the old days. The witch, knowing that Drican was the one who waged the war, granted him his wish. She cast a spell on him, and he perceived it as a gift. A blessing from the Gods. Her only warning for him was to not harm the innocents, an easy feat as he had sworn to protect them even before she shrouded him with her magic.
For her spell to work, a sacrifice was necessary. A human’s life. The more he killed, the stronger he became. The Emperor could feel the surge of energy flowing through his system as he drove his sword deep inside his opponent’s chest. Anguish was a hurricane churning inside his chest that he tried to put a blind eye on. There was no need for the two kingdoms to sacrifice the lives of their brave men, but it was a point of no return.
The Emperor deceived himself by believing that one death of his enemy would guarantee a life for his people. He stopped seeing the Dricans as humans. He perceived them as devils. And by the power bestowed by the Gods, he would send them back to the land of the dead.
The Emperor had the strength to decapitate a whole army by himself. Within three days, the Dricans kneeled before him, pleading for mercy. Their foreheads were glued to the ground, their body shaking in fear, and their lips were bitten hard to suppress their tears. The Emperor, for once, stopped raising his sword. He tried to find the will within himself to forgive, but before he could find it, a Drican soldier, unwilling to surrender, rose to his feet, snatched a knife hidden underneath his cloak, and tossed it forward. The dagger pierced through the air, aiming straight for the Emperor’s head but the spell protected him, hardened his skin, making it impenetrable. There was not a scratch on his body, and not a drop of blood was shed. The dagger clattered on the earth before the Emperor retrieved it with one hand. In the next second, the Drican soldier’s head was split into two, his own knife flying past through his skull.
The Dricans didn’t seek mercy, the Emperor concluded. They sought a chance to betray him, to strike him down when he was in his most vulnerable state. He wouldn’t give it to them. He wouldn’t let a traitor walk on his land.
And so the Emperor sent an order to slaughter them all. Every Drican, let it be men, women, or infants. Everyone needed to die. He was swallowed by his wrath that he forgot the caution the witch had given him. And when he took an innocent’s life for the first time, the amount of energy that flowed through him was a hundred times more intense. The witch had lied to him, the Emperor thought. Innocent lives didn’t weaken the spell, it strengthened it. Killing a faithful wife would grant him the same amount of power that he felt when he slaughtered ten vicious men. Killing a child would give him the strength to crack the earth open with a swing of his sword. With every innocent life he took, the greater magic he possessed.
The war lasted for months but it ended in one night. It was not followed by cheers of victory, only eerie silence.
Drican had fallen, and from their ashes, Nymeria rose stronger than ever.
Peace returned once again, but it was never the same. Before he ascended to the throne, the Emperor was once a kind, loving husband, and a doting parent to his children, Yuuta and Rika. Now, his sanity deteriorated with each passing second. The spell got to his head. He became addicted to power. He murdered each of his enemies but they never granted him the same power that he felt when he took innocent lives. He needed it. He needed to kill. But when he had run out of enemies to slay, his lust for power turned him blind.
Yuuta, a twelve-year-old boy at that time, was unable to catch a wink of sleep. It was the night of the full moon when he stepped down from his bed, dragging his little feet as he made his way to his parent’s chamber. He wished to see his mother, wanting to fall asleep with his head on her lap as he listened to the same lullaby she always hummed and sang to him to wash away his nightmares. It was childish of him to still want to be spoiled like that despite his age, but his mother never complained once. She found him endearing, and she was his first love.
The little boy landed a hand on the door, pushing it open as he rubbed his eyes away from sleep. “Mother,” he called but no one came to answer. Stepping further inside the room, he witnessed his mother lay down on the bed, her long black hair strewn across her pillow. Looming above her, trapping her waist between his knees, was the man who wore the same face as his father. But instead of a smile and affection in his eyes, the man bared his teeth, his eyes glowing as he curled his strong fingers around her neck, choking the life out of her.
Yuuta was petrified, his feet icebound to the ground as he watched with his big blue eyes shaking in disbelief. By the time he found his voice, his mother’s body had turned limp. Her beautiful eyes had lost their gleam, and she stared hollowly at her husband’s face. Yuuta saw the way his father sighed in relief, almost as if he was drowning in ecstasy. He stared at his hands, laughing as he felt power coursing through his veins. He felt alive, better than he had ever been.
Then the man stopped, sensing the little noise that Yuuta made as his breath hitched in his throat. His father spun his head around, facing his child and the tiny hairs on Yuuta’s nape stood in fear.
That man was not his father.
Yuuta ran as if the devil was chasing after him. He ran without looking back, his lungs burning and his heart bleeding. He returned to his chamber, locked the door, and pressed his back against it. His knees shook underneath his weight and he slid down to the floor. With both hands covering his mouth, he shut his eyes closed and sobbed. His younger sister, Rika, who was staying in the same room, woke up from her sleep at the sound of his muffled cry.
“Yuuta?” She crawled down from her bed, dragging her quilt behind her as she made her way toward her brother. “Yuuta, what’s wrong?” She went down to her knees before him, checking on his face with bleary eyes. “Why are you crying? A nightmare?”
“R-Rika…” Her name was strangled in his throat. “Mother–Mother is–”
The sound of a fist meeting door was heard from the other side and Yuuta jerked violently in surprise, returning back to his feet with his arms wrapped protectively around his sister. “Yuuta,” his father called, his thunderous voice was never laced with tenderness in the last few years. “Answer the door.”
“N-no!”
“Yuuta?” Rika, who sensed the horror in her brother’s voice, started to mimic his body language. “What is happening?”
“Yuuta.”His father’s voice pitched lower.
“Go away, Father!”
Enraged, the Emperor smashed the door with one hand. The children shrieked, holding each other tight as they fell to their knees. Yuuta embraced his sister close, placing his palms over her ears to silence her surroundings. The boy was still sobbing fervently, body shivering from head to toe, but in his eyes, there was a hint of bravery that the Emperor had seen in his worst enemy. No matter how much his feet were itching to run, Yuuta was determined to protect his sister.
“Stay away,” the boy said, peering deep into his father’s eyes with the intensity of a cornered wolf. “I won’t let you hurt Rika.”
The little girl was clutching onto his shirt, clawing at Yuuta’s chest as her tears stained his fabric. “Y-Yuuta, I’m scared.”
“It’s alright, Rika,” Yuuta replied, pressing his cheek against her forehead as he maintained his gaze on his father’s face. The tremble in his voice was no longer as apparent as before. “I will protect you.”
The sight of his children crouching in fear before him momentarily broke the spell that fogged his thoughts. The bloodlust in his eyes flickered like candlelight being swayed by the wind before it vanished completely. As if losing his strength at once, the Emperor kneeled on the ground, his face contorted in pain as he watched the siblings with his eyes rimmed by his tears. “I’m sorry,” the old man said repeatedly as he watched his trembling hands in horror. He seemed afraid, not of anyone but himself. “Please forgive me.” He reached out a hand, wanting to take his son’s hand but the boy took a step back.
“D-don’t touch me,” Yuuta said. He could tell that whatever it was that possessed his father a moment ago had left its vessel, but his fear made him hesitant.
Grave sadness overtook the Emperor’s face. “Yuuta… There are… Voices in my head.” His father confessed, and for the first time in his life, his son watched the hero who brought victory and honor to his empire–to his family–crumble in agony. “I can’t stop them… I had to do it. I needed to do it.”
“You killed Mother,” Yuuta said, each word vocalized with a dagger scratching against his throat.
“I didn’t mean to.” The man shook his head, pleading for forgiveness. “I don’t know what’s happening to me. I’m going insane, Yuuta. I can’t stop it. I just wanted to feel alive and the next thing I knew, I–” The man cast his gaze down to his hands, splaying his palms before he clenched them into fists. “This power is a curse. That witch… I have to find that witch to reverse it but…” He gritted his teeth, trying to stop a sob from fleeing out of his mouth. “My wife… My wife is gone… I killed her…”
Yuuta did not believe his words, but he stayed in silence, watching the tears line his father’s cheeks as he cried silently in shame. When the man elevated his face, he swore to him, “I won’t hurt you. I promise I won’t hurt you. My children… You are the only ones I have left.”
There was no guarantee that the Emperor would stay true to his promise. Even the man himself didn’t find the strength to believe in it. But despite what he had done, he was still the father who nurtured him, who taught him the meaning of life, the man who made his kingdom feel like home. Yuuta felt his heart break into pieces, even more than it already had.
On the next morning, as the servants cleaned and buried his wife’s corpse, Yuuta and Rika were escorted out of the palace without being given a chance to state their prayers. Afraid that he would harm his children in the future the way he did his wife, the Emperor sent them away to his relatives at the opposite end of the world, far away in the west. He bid his final words not with a goodbye but with an apology, leaving his children confused and shaken, but Yuuta never spoke a word. No matter how frail and heartbroken his father seemed, he would never be able to forget the wicked gleam in his eyes as he rejoiced over his wife’s death.
“I will find a way to cure myself,” his father promised them. “I will return to how I was. My sister will take care of you until then. Yuuta, Rika, we will be together again soon.”
The children traveled across the sea, accompanied by their most trusted knights to protect them and servants to attend to their needs. They rode the waves, making their way to visit their relatives in the west. That day, the sunset was the most beautiful one Yuuta had ever seen but he could not find the strength to appreciate it. And as if the sky listened to the storm that raged within his chest, the clouds turned dark and the heavens cried for his sake.
The gulls were tossed paper in a storm, flashes of white in the gray, tumbling as they struggled against the gale. Heavy droplets of rain felt like ice daggers on their skin, and the tides churned below them, tilting the ship from side to side. As the children and the servants struggled to find their way to the deck, fighting against the rainstorm, a sudden crash of waves toppled the ship and sent Yuuta’s body flying backward. He was clutching against the railing, screaming for help as he felt his fingers starting to lose grip. Beneath him, the sea rose as great mountains, anger in the form of water, turbulent and unforgiving.
He heard Rika shouting his name, her voice was a whisper among the thunders that rumbled through the sky. Before a hand could reach him, the storm stole him away.
Yuuta fell into the bottomless sea, forced to fight against its rage. And with no weapon in his hands, he let the Gods decide on his fate.
— no shame, at all. To be completely honest he probably have had perv dreams about catching you like this even before you two started dating. So, he gets a massive boner and is ready to shove it where it belongs: in your warm cunt
“i knew you were a horny mess,” he says as he leans on the door, hand coming to grab the outline of his massive cock through his grey sweatpants, “but not that you were this pathetic.”
“ eren!,” you cry out, trying to use the sheets to cover your indecency. but there’s no use. with the smoothness of a apex predator, he makes his way to your bed and snatch the white fabrics from your fingers. “w-what are u doing?!”
“giving you what your whore hole needs,” opening your legs with rough hands, he spits on your already wet core and frees his thick cock from his pants, lining it with your waiting entrance. and with one harsh thrust he fulfills your hungry pussy’s needs.
♡
— this pretty boy gets very flustered when he catches you having your fun without him and is high-key jealous. Gets all worked up and bossy, a silicon dick can’t replace him! and, he is gonna make sure you remember that.
“really, doll? a fake cock?” there’s more disappointment than anger in his voice. jean says shaking his head with flushed cheeks as he lays next to you on the bed. “Is this shit really making you moan so lewdly?”
“i- ah!” your brain can barely comprehend what’s going on when jean grabs the base of the purple dildo and shoves it into the deepest of your insides almost kissing your cervix. “Mmh what did you say? couldn’t hear you”
jean purrs before giving another thrust, finally keeping a steady pace. “i’m gonna c-cum!” you pant, and all movements stop. jean maneuvers you so that you lay on your side as he positions himself behind you holding one of your legs up and spreading your second lips to accommodate his massive cock. “finally, you are prep enough to take a real fat cock”
♡
— his consciousness tells him to close his eyes and to apologize but his dick thinks otherwise. Blue eyes remain glue to your cunt as he slowly gets all hot and bothered not sure if he should keep watching or join the fun.
“shit- armin i didn’t know you were home” you murmur, closing your legs with your hand still in between your thighs, fingers inside you. blinking a few times armin’s face starts heating up as he takes a sharp breath. “i didn’t mean for you to see me-”
“who told you to stop.” armin’s aura changes in a split of a second causing your walls to twitch. with heavy steps he brings a chair in front of the bed before sitting on it. “keep playing with yourself gorgeous, don’t mind me”
you knew it was an order and so you did. armin unzipped his pants with lustful eyes as you parted your thighs again unwrapping your intimacy to those blue eyes. you start rubbing your clit at the same pace he strokes his pink cock, speeding up until you spill your arousal on the bed sheets with a sinful cry. “good girl~ now, do it again, bouncing on my dick”
Warnings:Masturbation, mentions of sex, 18+, MINORS DNI
Summary:The aftermath of the fight is strange to say the least. Things are seemingly back to normal. Epiphanies are made.
A/N: HI GUYS! I am so sorry it took so long to get this chapter out >_< but it’s here now! I apologize that this is on the shorter side! but nonetheless I hope you enjoy :D
Chapter 7
Life is strange. At one moment, two people are fighting. They’re yelling at each other at the top of their lungs. Passion filling the room, desperate to come out in any form, whether that is anger or lust. In this particular situation, that passion can’t be harnessed in a way that would leave them breathless and euphoric. So they settle for the former rather than the latter. These two people were angry. Angry at each other and maybe angry at the pent up sexual frustration that seemed to follow them around like a monster stalking its prey. But neither of them would admit that second part out loud. Hence the reason they were fighting.
But then, in the very next moment— or rather the day after, it was as if nothing happened. The usual cheerful greetings and friendly smiles were still present in the elevator that slowly creaked it’s way up the seventh floor after a hard day’s work. And that’s what made life so strange. At least for Y/N.
Never in her life had she been in that big of a fight with someone, and then the next day have it be so easily forgotten. She had never cried that many tears to wake up with a fresh face, and a clarity she didn’t really understand. And for some reason she didn’t really expect Eren to be all that chipper either. But he was normal. He was fine. And so was she.
This was just how it was between the two of them. They played pretend. It was what they always seemed to do. They fall into their roles of neighbors because it was easy. And even if there’s a crack in their facade, one that could break it down in its entirety, they just seal it up. Layers and layers of plaster that cover up that crack until it’s a brand new wall. A stronger wall.
A wall that stood between them now, built by exchanged niceties and the usual shallow banter.
“How was work?” Eren asked as the elevator continued its journey upwards. Y/N looked up at Eren, finding genuine interest displayed on his features. She shrugged, shifting her gaze back to the moving numbers above the door. Level 4.
“The same as always.” She responded. Eren raised an eyebrow.
“For some reason, I feel like there’s more to that statement.” He said.
“What do you mean?” Y/N chuckled, her features holding a hint of surprise.
“It’s just the way that you said it.” It was Eren’s turn to shrug.
Y/N sighed, bringing a hand up to scratch at her temple. She wondered if it should be concerning that this man could read her so well. But now that she was here with him in this small moving room, Y/N couldn’t help but succumb to the listening ear Eren was providing.
“I guess I’ve just been feeling uninspired lately.”
Eren nodded, a soft, understanding ‘ah’ protruding from his lips as he did. He didn’t provide any input, but he didn’t need to. Y/N knew that he was there just to hear what she had to say. So surprisingly, to both of them, she continued.
“They’ve just been putting me on a lot of surface-level projects.” Y/N told him, she chuckled, a bit bashfully and added “Everything that I’ve been coming up with just seems so… staged.”
There was a usual response to this complaint of hers. She’s gotten it many times from colleagues, managers, and even the occasional unknown stranger that she foolishly confided in at the dinner parties she was dragged to by her friends. They always ask her the same thing. Isn’t that the point of photography? Isn’t everything staged these days? Especially if it’s for a magazine? Y/N was so used to this pattern that she had her own ready for these questions. She always just nodded, telling them that they were right and then moved on from the conversation. There wasn’t any point trying to make them understand where she was coming from. So she held her breath, expecting the same outcome from the man beside her.
“That’s boring.” Eren said instead. Y/N’s eyes snapped towards Eren once more.
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to offend you or anything.” He quickly said, mistaking her look of surprise to one of offense. “It’s just… I feel like I’m not alone in wanting to see something more real, you know?”
“Exactly.” Y/N breathed, her eyebrows furrowing. Confused by the fact that she agreed with Eren on something. The doors dinged to announce their arrival to their floor. They both stepped off the elevator, and it was assumed that the conversation would end there. But Eren continued, his steps slow to match her own as they walked down the hall.
“There’s this photo.” Eren started, pulling his keys from his pocket. “It’s of me and my best friend, Armin. We were in a play together for school, and my mom took forever trying to get us into our costumes. She eventually got us into them and corralled us in front of our house for a picture.”
Eren chuckled, shaking his head at the rest of the story that was still unknown to Y/N. She smiled softly, quite liking how Eren looked when he reminisced. She stayed silent as he continued.
“She got a pretty nice photo. You can find it in our living room now. We look like perfect angels.” He laughed, “But then, right after that photo was taken. Armin and I ripped off our costumes and started running around the lawn in our underwear. My mom was furious. Armin’s grandpa, however, found it hilarious, and he picked up mom’s camera and took a picture of the whole mess.”
Eren laughed and Y/N did as well. It was nice. They were normal.
“My mom likes to hide that picture.” He told her. “But I like it way more than the one in our living room. There’s just something about it.”
“It’s the moment in between.” Y/N whispered. They stopped in front of her door. Eren looked at her as if she put his exact thoughts into words. Even if they didn’t make sense to anyone else. He looked at her with parted lips.
“Yeah.” He agreed, his tone soft. “Those moments are way better than anything staged.”
They stared at one another. The facade slowly crumbling as they did. Y/N felt that weird tug in her heart that pulled her towards Eren. Always finding her at the most inopportune moments. She opened her mouth to say something. But her phone started ringing, sucking out any tension that was creeping into that hallway. Eren took a step back.
It was Bertholdt. Eren saw his name flash across her screen. His stomach dropped.
“I should take this.” Y/N murmured.
“Yeah, of course.” Eren nodded. They stared at each other for a second longer before the hallway was left empty.
Eren stood with his back pressed against his front door. Trying hard not to think about the conversation that was now taking place.
Y/N let her phone go to voicemail as Eren’s words rang in her ears. The facade that she held onto in that elevator completely disappeared. The wall breaking down, the foundation was always weak with the feeble lies that held it together.
~
Y/N ended up calling Bertholdt back. It did take a couple of hours. Internal conflict is not easy to sort through. She spent those hours, pacing her living room and trying to understand what she felt towards the man next door.
She’d cross the room, from one end to the other, feeling reassured by her opinion on Eren. But then, by the time she turned, and made it back to where her pacing began she would feel the complete opposite.
She would head towards the window. She’d realize that most of the time she hated him. It was easy. He was arrogant, disrespectful, and he had the annoying habit of pushing all of her buttons rather than leaving her alone.
But then as she started back towards her kitchen, she also realized that it’s hard to ignore the constant tugging of her heart whenever she was around him. Because even if he was being arrogant, or disrespectful, between the cracks he snuck in genuine kindness that had Y/N second guessing herself. And she found that she likes spending time with him. She liked hearing what he had to say, and she liked the small facts about him that he confided her with. But realizing that she liked those things about him, reminded her of the word.
Like. Like.Like. Say it enough times and it starts to sound like a fake word. One that doesn’t exist. And technically, it doesn’t exist. At least not for Eren and Y/N. He told her last night that he didn’t like her. And that’s when her internal conflict came to an end.
Why waste her time figuring out her feelings about a guy who admitted he didn’t like her? When she had a perfectly nice man calling her phone, who had proven that he was in it for the long haul. She dialed his number before doubt could find her again. And now they had their third date set for the upcoming weekend.
Three days away. Three days of more internal conflict. But she forced it out of her mind. She was determined to think only of Bertholdt.
Of course, run-ins with Eren were inevitable with a seventy-two hour window. Y/N saw him a total of four different times. (Yes, she was counting, to her dismay). Mostly they ran into each other in the parking lot like they always did. And every single time they acted like nothing happened. They were back to that weird but fine line of neighbors bordering on friends.
He cracked his usual jokes, she would always roll her eyes at him and everything that could’ve been more between them was forgotten. There were no more instances that had the wall between them deteriorating. And it was a relief to Y/N. She could go to bed at night and not stay up for hours, tossing and turning wondering what the hell could possibly be going on in Eren’s pretty little head. But somewhere lost within her blissful ignorance, there was a pang of disappointment. A form of disappointment that almost had Y/N wanting to take a sledgehammer to the stupid wall they built.
But she didn’t notice it. Or at least she forced herself not to. Instead she kept her promise to herself. Her thoughts revolved around one man. And it was the man who was now beside her. One hand on the steering wheel with the other placed lightly on her thigh. His thumb brushing up and down her skin and lightly trailing at the hem of her skirt.
Stopped at a red light, the brunette shifted his hand to clasp around Y/N’s fingers. He brought her hand up to his lips and placed a gentle kiss on her cold skin. She looked over at him, his features defined by the red glow of the traffic light, a soft smile graced her features at the small affection.
“Where are you taking me?” She asked for the third time that night.
“I thought I told you that it was a surprise.” Bertholdt grinned at her, dropping their intertwined hands back into her lap as the light turned green. The engine rumbled softly as they pressed forward. Intermingling with the sounds of the stereo playing an old rock song Y/N had never heard of.
“Just give me a hint.” Y/N responded, ignoring him. “Please, I need to know.”
“Haven’t you ever heard the phrase ‘curiosity killed the cat’?” He laughed.
“Am I gonna die on this date?” She questioned, raising a brow at him and earning more of his soft laughter as he shook his head.
“No, but you’ll regret it if you spoil the surprise for yourself.” He jokingly chided. Y/N slumped slightly in her seat, not really knowing if she enjoyed being in the dark like this. And she was also a bit annoyed that Bertholdt wouldn’t give her the information. She wondered if she would be annoyed if it was anyone else that was sitting in the front seat.
Before the reality of that thought process could find the girl, she sat up in her seat, a gasp escaping her lips. Her attention was caught by colorful flashing lights that came into view when Bertholdt turned a corner. A ferris wheel stood high into the sky, colorful tents littered the ground surrounding it, all sorts of rides scattered across the football playfield of a local highschool. Y/N peeled her eyes away from the glorious display to find Bertholdt giddy in his seat.
“That’s the exact reaction I was hoping for.” He told her as he began to turn into the designated parking lot for the carnival.
“How did you find out about this?” Y/N asked.
“I went to school here. I remembered that they put on this festival every spring, so I figured I’d look into it.” Bertholdt shrugged, putting the car in park. He leaned back in his seat running a hand through his short hair as he looked at her. “Do you like it?”
“I do.” Y/N smiled, her tone of voice soft. Feeling butterflies from the fact that Bertholdt put in time and effort into their date. Bertholdt grinned, leaning over the center console to place a chaste kiss on the girl’s lips. Y/N sighed contentedly as he then got out of the car to open the door for her. So many good signs that pointed towards Bertholdt being the right choice. Y/N was sure of her decision as they walked hand in hand towards the shining entrance, the gravel crunching beneath their feet with every step.
Y/N felt like a little kid. Her excitement followed her throughout the whole evening as she and Bertholdt went from one ride to the next. Her eyes were stimulated by the colorful displays of light and the crowds of people, she could barely hear herself think from the rambunctious kids that ran around the playfield and the joyful screams that accompanied each ride. The scent of fried dough and popcorn swirled through the air and Y/N felt the perfect mix of nostalgia and excitement.
It felt like she was constantly smiling or laughing. Her cheeks were beginning to hurt. She felt giddy with the way Bertholdt always seemed to be touching her. Whether it was his hand in hers, his side pressed up against her own in their seats for each ride, or how they were now, with his arms around her waist as they waited in line. His front pressed close to her back and his chin resting on her head. They were the classic obnoxious couple that shamelessly indulged in PDA. They looked happy. And they looked perfect.
The best part was with Bertholdt’s affection, Y/N hadn’t thought of Eren once. She was too focused on the present moment, a first for her. She always felt like she was always stuck in her own head. But now she was living freely and enjoying her time with her could-be-boyfriend.
Maybe the fight with Eren needed to happen. Maybe that was exactly what she needed so that she could finally feel a sense of peace. And that was all she felt as Bertholdt held her from behind. His lips pressing soft kisses to the crown of her head every so often. She doubted that Eren would ever hold her like this in public. Or at all for that matter. Not that she wanted him to.
Y/N was pulled from her thoughts by Bertholdt taking a step forward as the line shifted, he pushed her leg with his own, making her fall into step with him. Y/N giggled at his efforts to keep himself attached to her.
“Do you want me to win you a teddy bear or would that be too cliche?” Bertholdt then asked, his line of sight directed to the games they had not yet tried out.
“I happen to like cliches, thank you very much.” Y/N teased, turning around so that she could snake her arms around his waist. Bertholdt smiled down at her, placing a hand on her face as he leaned down to kiss her lips.
“Is that so?” Bertholdt asked between kisses. “Then how about I kiss you in the rain next. Or chase you through an airport.”
“Or you could come home with me.” Y/N said, a bit surprised with her own boldness. Bertholdt was too, his eyes were wide.
“What?” Bertholdt breathed, he pulled back so that he could get a better look of the girl’s face.
“It’s the third date…” She told him, “Isn’t that another cliche?”
Bertholdt looked at her with parted lips, his cheeks were tinted a bright shade of red, and his eyes were wide with surprise. Y/N bit her lip, her stomach flipping with nerves, not really knowing how Bertholdt would react to such a bold move. His gaze flickered down to her mouth where her bottom lip was tucked between her teeth.
“You said you liked cliches?” Bertholdt questioned, dragging his tongue over his bottom lip. Y/N nodded up at him, her eyes darkened as she thought of where this conversation might lead to. Bertholdt swallowed and then leaned forward, his lips brushing against her ear as he spoke.
“Then I guess it’s within my duty to do what makes you happy.” He said, his voice deep with want.
It was a nice surprise that Y/N felt her stomach flip and a shiver go down her spine as a reaction to Bertholdt’s words. A sultry smile slowly took over her features as she leaned forward, the tall brunette meeting her in the middle to capture her lips with his own. They were lost in another bout of PDA, this time far more shameful as it garnered glares from mothers standing in line with their children. But they paid them no mind, only separating when the college kid working the ride called them forward.
Y/N smiled bashfully at the bored worker but he only waved them through with a neutral expression, probably used to the romantic scenarios that always bloomed in the setting of a carnival. Especially when he had to work the line for the ferris wheel. A ride that offered the view of the entire city, painted with pink and gold under the setting sun. It was the perfect scene to finish off their perfect date. And as Bertholdt softly kissed her lips when their gondola reached its peak, Y/N was certain that she had made the right choice.
~
This was supposed to be easy. Eren had probably done this a hundred times— No, a thousand times, but no matter what he did, he couldn’t stop failing. This wasn’t like him. He was better than this.
But after the small character on his computer screen died for the twentieth time that night, Eren thought he must’ve lost his mojo. He groaned as he was sent back to the last save station, his avatar back at full health but Eren’s motivation was completely drained from his body. He considered shutting off the game, but if he did that his brain would turn back on. And he didn’t want to think about the other thing that was supposed to be easy. So he pressed on, his character moving forward, collecting the things he dropped when he died. But of course, now that the thought had popped into his head, Eren couldn’t help but start thinking about it again.
Just like this game was supposed to be, it was supposed to be easy to forget about a girl. He had done that countless times before, to the point where he even questioned his own humanity. Why was it that he was so unattached to the women before, but when it came to Y/N he couldn’t move on. What was so different about this situation?
Was it because he saw her on a daily basis? Did the constant reminder of her face bring back unfinished business everytime? If that was the case, then what even was the unfinished business? They had decided a couple of nights ago that what happened between them meant nothing. So there was no business to be unfinished. Just a mistake that happened to be the most invigorating sexual experience he ever had. And he didn’t even get off.
Eren’s character almost fell into a pit of lava as he suddenly came to an epiphany. That’s right! He didn’t even get off! Maybe this was all just a horrible case of blue balls. He couldn’t stop thinking about that night because of his pent up sexual frustration. It couldn’t be anything deeper than that, because as he’s proven to himself before, Eren is completely incapable of feelings. It’s not that Y/N was intoxicating and addicting. Eren was just his usual pervy self.
He almost wanted to laugh with relief when he finally came to that conclusion. All he had to do was get his dick wet and he’d be cured. He could go down to one of the many bars that littered this city and find someone right now to help him out with his little problem.
But why rush? Now that he knew what his problem was Eren felt far more comfortable in his skin. The gaming chair beneath him creaked as he leaned back, the game becoming a lot easier now that his head was free from the unfamiliar turmoil. Eren went through the motions of the final boss fight, this time emerging victorious.
Eren wasn’t even sure why he let himself get caught up in the girl next door anyways. This was always who he was meant to be. Why change his lifestyle when he could just continue what he was doing and lead a perfectly happy life. He didn’t have to worry about Y/N or that stupid fight, because they had already moved on from it. Who cares if there were things left unsaid. As far as he was concerned those things didn’t even exist.
With a clear conscience Eren finished the game within the hour. His eyes were stinging and his fingers were a bit numb, but he didn’t care. That was the best session he had in a while. And it was all thanks to his genius thought process. He should’ve known that doing something familiar would bring him back to his usual demeanor. Eren was almost made a fool for no reason.
A content sigh escaped his lips as his muscular arms stretched towards the ceiling, releasing the tension that had found his body from hours of sitting at his desk. He looked at the digital clock that sat on his nightstand to find that it was only a little past nine, leaving so much time in the night to express his newfound freedom from the shackles of his mind. Maybe he would call Armin and see if he was down to go out with him. Eren was in such a good mood he didn’t even care if he brought his girlfriend, forcing him to be the third wheel. He was just ready to have a good time.
As Eren tugged his phone out from the pocket of his sweats, his other hand fiddled with the power button of his PC. The annoying music that played throughout the scrolling credits of the game immediately ceased, the fans attached to his device slowing down leaving Eren alone with the silence of the night as he stood from his seat.
His thumb scrolled down his most recent calls, his attention averted towards the small screen to find the name of his best friend. But that’s when he heard it.
Eren wasn’t sure at first. He thought that maybe it was the apartment building shifting on its foundation. Or maybe the wind whistling through a crack in his window.
But then it happened again.
And again.
And he remembered his windows couldn’t open. And that the building was brand new. And the sound that he was hearing was most definitely the sweet moans that he’s only heard once before.
Y/N was moaning on the other side of that extremely thin wall.
Eren’s blood pressure spiked. Heat rose to his cheeks. And there was a very familiar stirring in his sweats.
He couldn’t believe it. Was miss holier-than-thou really pleasuring herself right now? Eren’s heart was beating a mile a minute. Was this payback? Did she… Did she want him to hear her?
Eren swallowed harshly, his throat suddenly dry as his dick rose to full mast at the thought that Y/N was touching herself for him.
He wanted to leave. He probably should have. This felt like an invasion of privacy. And who was he to assume that Y/N would masturbate just so that Eren could hear her?
But then again… She knew exactly how thin these walls were. And Eren had found that he was completely frozen in place. He willed himself to move. To take the first step out of that room so that he wouldn’t invade Y/N’s personal space. But something funny happened.
Instead of taking a step back, his feet moved forward. And once he took that first step, it was like a string was pulling him. He took another step forward. And another. And another. Until he was practically pressed up with his ear against the wall.
Fuck, he really was a pervert.
But he couldn’t help it. Her moans were so whiny and needy, and they were so close to forming into a word. And maybe that word would be his name.
Eren’s chest was heaving up and down with tortured breaths. The sound of her immediately bringing him back to the night he ate her out. He remembered how her lips felt against his. How her teeth felt biting at his lower lip. And he thought of her pretty little pussy. Soaking wet, just for him. He was hoping that she was in that same state now. Just for him.
His fingers were itching to find their way into his sweatpants. His erection was aching and throbbing and he wanted to wrap his hand around his shaft, bring himself to orgasm in time with the girl on the other side of the wall. His knuckles were turning white from how hard he had to fight himself to not indulge in that desire.
But then Y/N let out the sexiest noise he ever heard. Almost like she was begging for something more than what she was getting in that room of hers. Eren wanted to give it to her. He needed to give it to her. But he couldn’t. So to find any sense of release, he let his wandering hand slip past the elastic of his pants. His fingers easily found the hot skin of his cock, a sigh escaped his lips, and he smoothed his hand up to the head of his leaking cock, instantly met with the mess that Y/N caused. A moan almost left his lips, but he had to be quiet.
Or… did he? If Y/N knew just how thin these walls were, and she was being this loud as she touched herself. Wouldn’t it only be natural to give her a reaction? Eren began lazily stroking his cock, the pleasure already building up from every touch. He wished it was her hand, but this would have to do. His movements were quicker, more concise and sure of what he wanted. He opened his mouth, another moan settling at the back of his throat. It started to roll forward, reaching the tip of his tongue. Y/N was about to find out that she wasn’t alone in the sexual exploration of herself—
But then Eren found out that she hadn’t been alone at all.
Bertholdt’s rough grunts protruded through the night. Eren’s heart dropped to his stomach. His hand snapped away from his hardened cock, he took a large step back which caused him to topple over the gaming chair that was still left out from when he stood. He scrambled back up, moving as far away from their shared wall as he could. His back pressed up against the door to his bedroom. His breathing heavy, not from lust, but from horror.
Y/N wasn’t touching herself. She was fucking Bertholdt. Eren wanted to punch himself. Or Bertholdt. He held back the embarrassed groan that threatened to escape his lips.
Screwing his eyes shut, Eren tried to get back to the mindset and clarity he had found earlier in his gaming chair. But that was becoming increasingly difficult as Bertholdt grew louder and louder. Drowning out the beautiful sound of Y/N’s moans.
And for some reason that annoyed the hell out of Eren. His jaw was clenched as he glared at the wall.
Another epiphany hit Eren at that moment. One that erased the stupid fucking conclusion he came up with only minutes prior.
Eren wanted to be the one to make Y/N sound like that.
He wanted to be the only one.
Wait—What?
Before he could realize the truth of that statement— or rather ignoring the truth— Eren grabbed the sweatshirt he left on his bed earlier that day. He threw it over his torso as he wrenched open the door to his bedroom and trudged through his apartment, far away from any noise that Bertholdt might be making. Or any noise he might be causing Y/N to make. And with a great big slam of his front door, Eren went out into the night, hoping that his fucked up brain would come to it’s senses. But somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that his hope was most likely wasted.
~~~
A/N: Well… the thin walls finally came to bite Eren in the ass… also I guess I could’ve made this chapter longer by writing out the sex scene between Bertholdt and Y/N but… I didn’t want to lol. Anyways! I hope you enjoyed this chapterrrrr :) Feel free to message me :D
Starring; Various Characters from Attack on Titan.
Warnings; 18+ minors dni + general descriptions of genitalia + cum + mentions of genital piercings + afab reader.
Wordcount; 1.0k
Note; Repost from my old blog <3 Been thinking about these headcanons so I figured I’d share my thoughts on what the aot men’s dicks look like <3 Enjoy <3
Chapter Summary: Reader, a nurse, finds themselves facing a fanged beast, unsure what to make of the world. But this devil with dark hair may not have the intentions you think.
☤this work of fiction deals with vampires. in turn, there will be discussions of blood and minimal gore. it will also include nsfw content in the near future. all chapters will be marked appropriately☤
Moonlight soaked the path towards his freedom. It danced and reflected off of the dew coated blades of grass. Each one emulated a life he planned to save, with the destruction of his people and the protection of the person he cared for most in the world. She had yet to materialize into something more than the soft breeze of a memory.
He was hungry; the tortuous cry of his instinct to ravage told him so. However, years of training and restraint had yielded him more than capable of swallowing his own desire. The one thing he sought most weighed heavier than impotent monstrous actions. For his goal, he could resist the craving to release his sharpened fangs.
He allowed his eyes one last glance over the house he’d called home for the past four years; dark and gloomy against the stormy night sky. Soon, those who’d chained him in shackles and dragged him to the cellar would be amiss in panic. Wrought iron bars that once caged his devilish soul would be found empty. A beast was on the run.
He felt brief sorrow for those he would hurt in the process of securing their freedom from a pained existence. But he’d made up his mind. All that was left to do was to head north.
His nimble hands pulled the dark hood of his coat above his head. He took one deep breath, the entrancing smell of rain and dirt wafting through the air.
North, to the person that occupied his past, present, and future. To freedom.
☤ ☤ ☤
You considered yourself well suited to the role you’d decided to serve for the rest of your life. Time spent meticulously memorizing health patterns and disease characteristics had broadened your sense of confidence. Doubt rarely ever plagued your mind past the childish decision of what to eat for breakfast in the morning.
Nursing had not always been your final destination in life; the unprecedented scared you enough to mark healthcare as a profession to avoid. Losing two parents unexpectedly in high school due to a mysterious illness had been enough to change your once convinced mind.
Your rain jacket was slick with the slight precipitation clouding the late night sky as you entered the hospital locker room – a weak cup of coffee in hand, marred with a ring of chapstick residue against the lip. Night shifts were often greeted with unrelenting misery on your behalf.
“You look excited to be here,” The familiar tone of your coworker hummed from behind you. There seemed no force strong enough to concur surprise in your unrested eyes. Historia was someone who lacked a certain fear factor in most aspects of her being, anyways.
“I didn’t see you when I came in, Historia,” You answered, eyes glancing over your shoulder to take in the blonde-haired nurse. Despite having walked in the rain the same as you, her demeanor was much more spritely.
She gave you a smile, following you towards your adjacent lockers. “Ah, I came in the back entrance today.”
“You’re awfully chipper for someone who’s working the night shift,” Your half-assed attempt at being friendly mingled with the clammer of your locker. Historia chuckled softly from behind her door.
“I prefer the night shift, actually. Isn’t this your third night on?” She asked. You slipped your wet jacket from your shoulders, shaking it slightly before hanging it in the metal box.
“Yeah, it is. Can’t say I enjoy it as much as you do,” You lightly closed the door, Historia doing the same. Overt kindness wasn’t a trait you claimed when burnt out on work; she knew this and gave you no foul for it.
Her blue eyes crinkled in the ghost of a smile. “Not a creature of the night, hm?”
“I’m no vampire, that’s for sure,” You chuckled. Historia’s smile faltered slightly. It came as no surprise that she was afraid of monsters and ghouls. You decided to change the subject in her favor. “Speaking of, I hear it’s a full moon tonight.”
“Oh?” Her eyes widened, coy smirk wiggling its way back onto her blushed cheeks. Despite your adverse to the unknown, you enjoyed indulging in childish hospital rumors. The notion that weird cases spiked on nights when the moon was full in the sky was a tale as old as time; strange people flooded the hospitals, with even stranger injuries and illnesses. Or so that was what people said, not that you’d ever experienced it yourself. “I wonder if anything crazy will happen tonight.”
“Doubt it,” You stepped aside, allowing her to match your stride as the two of you headed towards the conference room for a briefing before the shift. She hummed in agreement, the rest of the walk done in a comfortable silence.
The room for debriefing was a mundane conference set up. The walls were a bleached white; anatomy posters and warnings about the harmful nature of cigarettes decorating the walls. An oval desk surrounded by blue, plastic chairs took up most of the room. It smelled like microwaved Kraft, courtesy of a nurse scarfing down a last helping before their shift started.
“That’s odd,” Historia frowned, blue eyes tracing the room. Staff sat around in quiet huddles, most silently waiting for the briefing to start. She glanced down at her watch before nudging you in the arm. “Where’s Doctor Smith? We start in two minutes.”
The tall, burly man was never late for a briefing; his stoic nature didn’t allow room for such a lack. He had never given you a reason to doubt his trust, but something about his demeanor made you uneasy. He commanded a room with such conviction that your coworkers fell to his feet with unadulterated respect; you, a mindless sheep following their lead. Rational thought would’ve placed your discomfort on his position of power and his role as your boss. Simply put, however, he gave you the creeps.
The plastic chair skidded against the polished floor as you took your seat at the table beside Historia. The older staff coughed and occasionally grumbled, filling the tired silence with a sense of annoyance. Your blonde coworker sensed your gripe, elbowing you in the ribs and leaving a crease in your lilac scrubs. You suppressed a smile.
“Pardon me,” Doctor Smith’s commanding voice echoed through the room before he stepped in the doorway. Your muscles tensed; back straightening as if to give the illusion that you hadn’t been hunched over, looking exhausted and miserable. His blond hair was perfectly sculpted; not a strand out of place and not a wrinkle in his blue dress shirt. His lab coat was almost a sickeningly bleached titanium. “Sorry for my tardiness; I was dealing with an emergency back home.”
Historia shifted beside you.
“Let’s get started, shall we?” He gave a terse smile before picking his clipboard off of the table and flipping through the papers. “Looks like we’ve got the regular scheduling for this evening. As usual, the night shift staffing is lighter than our other shifts, so remember to be vigilant and take action without being told to.”
You tended to tune out the mundane precautions and warnings that were part of a pre-shift briefing. Outside the window, rain pattered against the glass pane. The shower provided a sense of comfort; rain often preceded a night spent inside, wrapped in blankets with a mug of hot tea. Though your current schedule didn’t allow room for such indulgence, you took a small delight in the weather condition.
Historia bumped your knee with her own under the table. You glanced at your friend, slightly alarmed from your daze. She leaned over, attempting to discreetly whisper in your ear. “He looks distracted tonight, hm? Wonder what that’s about.”
Your eyes glanced at Doctor Smith, who was reading through the clipboard with a staccato like urgency. Not wanting to cause any disturbance, you nodded your head in agreement.
“We’ll follow through with our regular assignments. If you don’t know where you’re located this evening, I suggest checking the bulletin in the locker room. As for this meeting, you’re all free to go,” His blue irises scanned the faces of all the employees, searching for confusion or questions to be answered. You averted your gaze, following suit as the rest of the room erupted in moving chairs and shuffling scrubs.
You already knew where you were working for the night; the same place as the last two, over in the geriatrics wing. This night would be the same as the others, not that you were in any place to be upset about that.
“Y/N!” Historia’s voice called you to look over your shoulder, barely out of the conference room. She had a slimy smile on her face; the kind that reeked of favors and avoidance. You felt the need to control your eyebrow from rising in annoyance. “Can I ask you something?”
You exhaled from your nose. “Shoot.”
“I have a patient in room 702 that I was assigned to,” The slightest batting of her mascara slicked lashes, blue irises working their hardest to win you over. You raised your eyebrows, urging her to continue. The other staff shuffled by you, sparing nosy glances. “I was wondering if you could take it? I’ll work in the geriatrics wing tonight for you.”
You had to give it to the tiny woman; for all she was worth, she was great at getting people to do what she wanted. You valued her responsibility and reliability, and she’d proved to be a friendly presence in the workplace. However, that didn’t stop you from seeing the selfish underbelly of her prosperous actions.
“What’s the patient in for?” You humored her. Even if her request was self-fulfilling, you figured might as well use it to your own advantage. Almost anything beat another night in geriatrics changing diapers and administering pill dosages.
“A blood transfusion,” She responded, smiling softly at you. “I’m not very good with bloody things, you know. Easily squeamish.”
You pretended to ponder whether or not to take her up on her offer. It was an easy choice, really. “Yeah, sure. What blood type are they?”
☤ ☤ ☤
The stand rattled unpleasantly against the tiled ground as you stopped in front of room 702. The thick bag of blood shook slightly from the sudden stop. How Historia had ever become a nurse when grossed out with the concept of blood, you weren’t sure. It seemed that her sweet disposition often aided her in whatever situation she needed to change for the better. You were an adult woman though, so whatever her motivations might’ve been didn’t concern you.
You gave the cart a once over, making sure all the necessary tools and items were there: a needle, an IV, gauze, those sorts of things. Blood transfusions were a typically fussless procedure; tediously watching the red liquid pump itself into the body.
Your knuckles lightly knocked on the door. “Hello, I’m here to give you your blood transfusion!”
Silence, beating through the empty hallway of the hospital. The lights were dimmed and eerily abandoned. You waited for ten seconds before opening the door to the sleepy room.
The heavy door creaked open, revealing he who was to be given blood. Historia had mentioned he was a John Doe, lying unconscious on the bleached sheets. You turned back to grab your cart, not bothering to be quiet. He’d be awake soon enough, anyway.
As you wheeled it in, your back was to the patient. The cart squeaked and rattled, stopping at the foot of the bed. You turned around, ready to rouse him from his slumber.
Beautiful.
You’d had attractive patients before. Both men and women who floated by life with the easy wings of accurately placed facial features to boost them up. A pretty face often had heat rising to your cheeks, but professionalism stopped you from thinking any further. Natural biological responses couldn’t be helped, after all.
Never had a patient left your lips parting in awe, heart drumming up it’s own beat of excitement in your chest. His face was slim; sharp jawline and a large, broad nose peeking out into the air. Pale cheeks barely dusted by the pink of an almost intangible blush. His eyelashes were long and thick, jutting out against the purple hue of his impossibly dark circles. Hair the color of old driftwood swirled and bunched on his pillow. He had to have been one of the most attractive people you’d ever treated, let alone seen.
What color were his eyes? Were they a dark brown, one to match the nature of his hair color? Or were they green, contrasting his pale skin? You began to feel eager to find out, more excited to know and learn as your gloved hand gripped his broad shoulder. You frowned at the frigid temperature of his skin.
“Excuse me, sir,” You gently shook, trying not to give away the way your body was reacting. There was no place for hormonal displays in your line of work, and despite his undeniable beauty, you were determined to remain professional.
His eyelids snapped open with such a speed you had to compose yourself not to trip backwards. Contrary to what you thought, his irises were a pale, almost sickly greyish blue. They held no gleam; no life behind them. Disturbance washed over your brain, warning bells going off in your mind. He looks slightly… feral?
He jolted upwards, confusion knotted on his once peaceful face. You stumbled backwards slightly, hip clipping on the cart.
“Who are you?” His voice was gravelly, as if it hadn’t been used in quite some time. Blue eyes stared at you with such an uncertainty it made your head spin.
“I’m your nurse, I’m here to give you your blood transfusion,” You gestured towards the cart and stand, a red bag hanging from it like a token of peace. Despite his prickly reaction, you weren’t frightened.
“I feel like I’ve met you before,” He said, eyes squinted. Analyzing you, trying to pick apart your being, yet there you stood before him, a marvel to be held. He briefly glanced to the side; not more than a millisecond were his eyes off you before they were back, filled with unadulterated panic. “Where- where is Historia?”
You frowned, a little perturbed. “She asked to swap-”
“I need you to leave, now.” He growled, voice deep and authoritative. You widened your gaze, taken aback by his demanding request. The sheet fell from around his shoulders, bare chest exposed. Large hands raced to his face, hiding the features you’d once considered beautiful. “Get out of here!”
“Are you alright?” You panicked, stepping closer to the bed. His large form began shaking, knees drawing towards his chest from under the blanket. He appeared to be in pain; like a wounded animal.
“Fuck,” He yelled, breathing becoming labored. There wasn’t time to ponder. Was he having a panic attack? Was he going into shock? Questions didn’t need to be asked, you just knew that you needed to act. “I said leave!”
“No, I need to help you with whatever-” His hand shot off of his face, long, black claws sharpening from his fingers. You became fear stricken, his palm connecting with your chest. It sent you stumbling backwards, tripping over the wire to the heart monitor and slamming into the wall with your back. Tendrils of pain clamored up your spine.
“Close your eyes,” He rose from the bed, both hands dropping from his face. You couldn’t see his eyes, fist clutching your scrubs above your heart. Uncertainty. Terror, facing death like this. A monster stood before you, created by the devil himself. Tall, foreboding, chest heaving. His neck snapped upwards; wide, red eyes piercing into your thinly veiled soul. He spoke something like a garbled beast. “Promise me you’ll close your eyes.”
You didn’t respond. There were no words to be spoken. Between his pink lips glinted a pair of large, sharp incisors. “Promise!”
You reverberated with his words, wincing and shutting your eyes involuntarily. He didn’t want you to watch as he slaughtered you. “I-I promise!”
The loud clamor of metal colliding with the polished floor had you breaking your promise mere seconds after it’d been made.
He stood, illuminated by the fluorescent bulbs like an angel ascending to heaven. The bag, once an object you’d believed to be a healing beacon, clutched between clawed hands. His teeth, bare to the world, puncturing the thick plastic as though it were paper.
His adam’s apple bobbed rhythmically as he swallowed mouthfuls of thick, red blood. It was as if he’d been starved; knees buckling and desperate blood sucking so intense that his legs could no longer support his body weight. He knelt on the once clean floor.
The twine that connected your sense of reality and rationale had been pulled taut – pieces of the frayed string snapping and threatening to drop you into depths unknown. Uncertainty had always been a foreign concept; you’d been given the option to study your circumstance and fully conceptualize it before going head first into a situation.
That’s what had intrigued you about being a nurse; though the job seemed like a bull in a china shop, you’d learned every reason why or how that bull ended up there and what exactly you needed to do to get it out.
You lacked the expertise or even the understanding to handle this particular situation. What studying could’ve been done? Reading horror stories or watching Twilight as a teenager with your friends? Even then, the probability of this happening to you felt like it should’ve been a zero percent chance.
You liked knowing what to do. Thrived on it, actually. This man, tall and dangerous, presented you with no opportunity to know. There was no textbook on how to handle a vampire, as childish as it felt to recognize that that’s what this was.
You’d been so sure. So convinced that there was no possibility of this heinous monster being an actual thing to walk the same crusted earth as you. Yet here he was, dawning the shape of a man and the face of an angel. How could someone so beautiful be so terrifying?
The hospital wall was cold against your back, the distant hammering of an organ that no longer felt placed in your chest rang true against your clenched fist. You felt the chilling call to move, to rise from your place and run. You didn’t know where, but the muscles in your thighs screamed a silent symphony.
He made quick work of the bag, like it was nothing and had never been anything in the first place. Who had donated that blood? They were probably asleep somewhere, lying in a bed and dreaming of a different world. A world where their charitable donation wasn’t being consumed by a devil before your terrified soul.
The red liquid oozed from his lips and dripped onto his barren chest. You hadn’t moved since you’d collided with the wall what felt like an eternity ago. Your ears rung rapidly with the obnoxious blood flow to your overstimulated brain.
Eyes the shade of a blue jay traced from a pair of blood soaked claws up towards your face, following the path of destruction. Though shock and fear reverberated through your every nerve, the softness in his gaze dulled a small part of your terror. He looked guilty, holding his dripping hands in front of his face like he’d just committed murder.
“You promised to close your eyes,” A voice so small, as if he’d known you your whole life and you had just witnessed a character altering situation. Something echoed in the back of his words, something that sounded like resentment. You couldn’t tell if it was directed at your prying eyes or himself.
“I- I didn’t, I mean, I tried not to but,” You were at a loss. A loss for a way to communicate how you were feeling, a loss for sanity in the world. The monster before you scowled, as if scolding a child who’d disobeyed their parent. “What are you?”
He brought his bloody hands to the floor; you noted that the claws were gone. “I figure it’s pretty obvious at this point. Can’t you tell?” He whispered.
“But vampires aren’t-” His steely gaze hardened at your choice of words. “They aren’t real, are they?”
“They are,” He responded, looking at you with such a strong emotion that you shifted uncomfortably against the wall. What was he thinking? Those eyes looked like they were fixed on someone he cared deeply for, not someone he’d met mere minutes ago. “But you weren’t supposed to know that, which is why I asked you not to open your eyes.”
“You started drinking a bag of blood right in front of me!” You whisper-yelled, brows knitting together to display your slight frustration. The wonder and fear still laid active in your chest, but something about him was familiar and comforting, despite his gruesome actions. You couldn’t explain exactly why you knew he would bring you no harm. “Of course I was going to open my eyes. If I’m not supposed to know, why would you do that right in front of me?”
His scowl deepened. “I tried to warn you. I haven’t had any blood in awhile and I lost control of myself.”
“What happens now?” Your question came out smaller than intended, unfamiliarity rising in your abdomen. The thick stench of blood was beginning to make your intestines twist in disgusting unease.
The question sought to strike a chord in the young man’s features; a grim and saddened look swept across his sharp attributes. His hand came up to pinch his temples, unperturbed by the bloody fingerprints left in its wake. “We have to get out of here, and fast. If we don’t, the people who are after me will kill you.”
“Kill me?” The word had a different sense of fear wafting over you; the kind that pricked your eyes with the sensation to shed tears. He looked pained. “I can tell them that I didn’t see anything, I can promise that I never saw you and-”
“It doesn’t work like that,” He snapped, glancing at you with irritation. His harsh tone forced your pleas to die unsaid in your throat. “The people following me aren’t rational. One of them will also be able to tell you’re lying.”
“So then, what am I supposed to do?” You cried, allowing the bottled up and suppressed emotions to spill over the thin wall of resolve that his comforting presence provided. He didn’t flinch but remained in serious tranquility. “I’m supposed to leave here and hit the road with some random man, who is a fucking vampire, and what? Hope for the best?”
He looked away from you, blood-covered face staring at the hospital bed that he’d once occupied. “It’s my fault you’re stuck in this now. I owe you enough to protect your life as best as I can.”
You were in hysterics. What sort of ultimatum was this? Stay and die or leave and risk dying? Another predicament that couldn’t be solved with the aid of literary education. Resentment was beginning to build in your own chest. Diving into an unexplored depth of the ocean, brimming with creatures and lore that you had never predicted to be real.
“Hey,” You snapped back to reality. The man before you scooted forwards slightly. Though his face was that of a devil, soaked in another’s blood and deathly pale, his movement had your chest tightening in something other than fear. “I won’t let them hurt you. I promise, if you come with me, you’ll be safe until I can get them off our tail. Then I’ll take off and they’ll follow me, leaving you alone.”
Sticky tears trailed down your cheeks, eyes burning. When did you start crying? “How – how can you be so sure? How can I trust you?”
He was on his hands and knees in front of you now, sharp nose half a foot away from your face. Any call to breathe was put on hold, teary eyes widening slightly at his stare. It was soft and open, trusting in the strangest way. His dark hair hung around his face.
“My goal is to rid the world of demons such as myself. That’s why they’re after me, and why they would take your life to guarantee silence. When I’m finished with what I want to accomplish, I will be dead and so will they. I have nothing to gain by hurting you. I promise to keep you alive long enough to see the end of this.”
Your lips parted in awe. The conviction in his tone was that to lead an entire army into battle; to create religions and cult followings. Blessed be the demon who wished to take down his own kind.
You had spent years convincing yourself to trust in what others told you to follow. Self-intuition wasn’t enough to breed a successful nurse; you needed the expertise of studies and procedures done before you. You required the necessary tools that others had used and approved of. Your heart’s certainty had no place in medicine. It had no place in the tried and true.
The man slowly rose one freezing hand towards your face, apprehensively watching for your reaction. You sat unmoving, owl-eyed. His palm caressed your chin, cold thumb swiping the tear from your cheek, smearing blood in its wake. “Find it in your heart to trust me.”
The conviction of his words rang lightning through your veins, mouth speaking without precedented thought. “Okay.”
He rose from his crouched position, offering a red hand to help you up from against the wall. You shook your head. There had been enough blood sharing for the evening, sanitation crossing your mind as you shakily slid along the rough plaster, bracing yourself to display a toughness that you weren’t sure you contained.
The rule of thumb not to trust those whom you don’t know played a soft melody in your heart. Mothers’ warnings and fathers’ lectures. Apparently all you had been told fell upon deaf ears, clouded with the hazy judgement of a life threatening situation. But in circumstances such as these, did the general rule apply? You were left to ponder.
“Hey, wait,” You frowned, a dumbfounded feeling crossing your mind as the man stepped towards the opposite side of the room. He stopped and turned, sharp jaw jutting against his mane. “What even is your name?”
“Oh,” He turned back towards the other side of the room. You didn’t follow. The door was the opposite direction, so whatever business he had over there did not concern you. “It’s Eren. And you?”
You felt a slight heat rise to your cheeks at the confession of his name. It was beautiful, feeling somehow appropriate for his physical appearance. “It’s Y/N.”
“Ah,” He responded, as if he already knew. You scoffed inwardly at his tone, still anxiously pressed against the wall. His blood stained hand rose to the latch on the window, attempting to open it.
“Why are you opening the window?” You questioned, noticing a beep from out in the hallway. The door stood open, allowing passersby to witness the blood on the floor and your cheek, as well as this man called Eren, who appeared straight out of a horror movie.
Closing the wooden door meant deciding with certainty to trust him; to follow him and hope that whatever tales of murderous vampires he’d shared had been truthful. To step away from the knowledge and the comfort of your current life. It implied that no one would see you in there with him and come to your rescue.
They will kill you.
Your hand gently clicked the heavy door into its place.
Turning back to Eren, you noticed his hand wrapped around the latch to the window. He was frozen in place, watching you make your final choice.
“You didn’t answer my question,” You reiterated. Eren turned back towards the glass. His reflection wavered slightly in the shine.
“This is how we’re getting out of here,” Eren responded, pulling the latch and shoving the window open as far as it would go. It stopped at about two inches, for safety reasons.
Disbelief once again danced across your mind, pulling you into what was beginning to feel like a new equilibrium. “If you’re planning to leap out of that window, it only opens that far.”
He ignored you, bringing his bloodied palms up against the glass. It appeared as though he merely shoved it; so light that it shouldn’t have budged. It shouldn’t have moved at all. The heavy window snapped at its industrialized hinges, pummeling down towards the ground below.
He glanced at you from over his shoulder, one eyebrow raised semi-smugly. You gawked back; simultaneously impressed by his strength as well as put off. “Let’s go.”
“I’ll die if I jump from here,” You scoffed, still not moving from your place. Eren stared back emotionlessly. He stepped towards the bed, reaching beneath it and pulling out what appeared to be a black hooded jacket.
He swung it over his shoulders, pulling the hood above his head. “I know. If you ride on my back, you won’t die.”
“Are you always this mundanely serious about fucking supernatural shit like this?” You spat. There was a warmth beginning to settle in your face as well as your core; heated by the idea of being so close to him.
“Yes,” He retorted, walking towards you so quickly you thought your head would start spinning. “No time to waste with your endless questions.”
He reached down, abruptly swooping you up from behind your thighs, effectively gripping you bridal style.
“Eren, put me down. Put me down!” You started squirming as he thundered towards the open window. You hated heights as much as the next person; they were fine in retrospect, but made you dizzy when in close proximity. Eren seemed unbothered by your quiet cries of protest.
“Eren, I swear to god,” You brought your fist to his broad chest. He ignored you, stepping onto the ledge of the window. Against any better judgement you still retained, your eyes glanced towards the drop. Your stomach sank, becoming a heavy boulder in the bottom of your abdomen. “Fuck, put me down!”
He stared down at you. A gaze so tranquil that the rest of the scene seemed to fade away. You became hyper-aware of his bare chest which you were pressed against; that unfamiliar churning in your core spreading towards your limbs.
