one of the problems with Trads™ is that they don’t adhere to any kind of actual, legitimate tradition. it’s mostly 1950′s fetishism disguised as some Holy and Revered Ancient Tradition. women have worked for the majority of european and american history. i’m a pregnant housewife and even i can recognize that this lifestyle basically came about in the last century lol
but the even worse thing is how they think that only two kinds of women exist: the horrible, evil feminist whores who dare work outside of the home, and the feminine maidens who are just so desperate for a 30 year old dude from tumblr to come provide for them
and it’s just horribly unfair and they don’t see or care how it’s horribly unfair. and btw their whole femininity obsession is also a fetish, like no normal person in their right mind bases their identity around dresses and flowers and baking pies. that’s just things people do, they don’t post about it all day on tumblr
Both modern feminist types and fake trads make the same error:
They SEVERELY underestimate how much work has historically been involved in running a household.
Women have historically been involved in not just cooking meals, but the growing, harvesting, preserving, and storing of food. Before the modern grocery store, running a household was a management position plus physical labor.
And that’s before you add kids into the mix.
You can look at all kinds of cultures where the division of labor goes along gender lines. Women skin animals, clean and tan hides, cut apart bone and fat and organs, smoke things, dry things, salt, brine, etc in order to prevent hundreds of pounds of food from going to waste, not to mention all the other resources that come from an animal, whether livestock or game.
And that’s just meat animals. Dairy, eggs, vegetables all require long hours of difficult physical AND mental work. Properly managing resources requires planning and organization. And no, I don’t mean a cute binder from Pinterest. You can find logs and diaries from households just a couple hundred years ago detailing what’s in the cellar and how much is being used day to day, how long things will be good, what to substitute if this or that ingredient is spoiled or runs out.
This is difficult work. It doesn’t lend itself to pretty Instagram photos.
Trad men, you’re not working all day so your wife can be soft and pretty at home. You’re working all day because she is too.
The thing that really let me think in the right way about parenting was realising that raising a good person and raising a “good child” are incompatible.
How can a child develop the ability to challenge and question authority if they cannot challenge and question adults? How can a child learn to value and defend their autonomy if they cannot refuse the demands placed upon them? How can a child learn to fight bigger injustices if they cannot fight over something they feel isn’t fair? How can a child learn to be at peace with their emotions and the emotions of others if they are not allowed the freedom to express their emotions without consequence? How can a child learn to listen to and care for their bodies if they are not allowed to sleep when their body asks or eat what their body demands?
Unquestioning obedience is not a good trait. Fear of authority is not a good trait. Always being sweet with a smile on your face is not a good trait. Being unable to create conflict is not a good trait. Being unwilling to fight is not a good trait. Compromising your boundaries is not a good trait. Prioritising pleasing others over your own needs and autonomy is not a good trait.
Good parenting means intentionally making your life harder. A difficult child is a good person. Your job is to guide your child into becoming the best adult they can be. It is not to make your own life easy. It is not to have the approval of others. It is not to make their teacher and grandparents lives easy. Your priority is your child and nothing else.
I like this insofar as it makes the point that “ordered” does not necessarily mean geometrical or legible.
I feel like the second image needs a different word for it. It’s disordered, but it’s disordered in a deliberate way. Chaos as I usually think about it is solved by ordering, but the “chaos” seen here can never be solved that way. There’s some third state that I don’t have a name for.
Today, we commemorate 78 years since the May 18, 1944 mass deportation of the Crimean Tatars from their homeland in Crimea, Ukraine.
It was the ethnic cleansing and cultural genocide of at least 191,044 Crimean Tatars on 18–20 May 1944 carried out by the Soviet government.
Can you even imagine it? They did it just in three days.
Nearly 8,000 Crimean Tatars died during the deportation, while tens of thousands died because of the harsh exile conditions. The Crimean Tatar exile resulted in the abandonment of 80,000 households and 360,000 acres of land.
A lot of Crimean Tatars have returned home after the collapse of the Soviet Union. Today Crimea is occupied again by Russia. A lot of Crimean Tatars are imprisoned and repressed. Again.
There is so much pain in the history of this brave nation.
Ukraine will win and Crimea will return to Crimean Tatars.
TheA.I. passage in the Vanity Fair piece I posted last night got me thinking about the film. Spielberg said, “A substitute love child, you know, is almost a crime, and the human race pays for that crime” and that’s certainly true. The only human we see at the end of the film is a projection of David’s mother. Everyone else is long gone, replaced by robots.
What interested me though is the idea of David as a victim of the crime Spielberg speaks of. He’s certainly a victim of sorts. He’s first created by Professor Hobby as a means to help the man recover from his son’s death, and then adopted by Monica and Henry Swinton to perform a similar task for them. In the end, he’s taken in by the advanced mechas and is again used - he becomes a lab rat who is experimented on to help the mechas understand human love.
But is David totally innocent in all this? Perhaps not. David is committing the same crimes that are being inflicted upon him. Just as he was used, he is now using Monica to help him feel loved. It’s the tragic brutality at the heart of the film. Humanity’s most basic need is for love, and we’ll do anything to gain it.
