#pesach
Веселого та кошерного песаха!
What if we just decided that the Wednesday of Pesach was Frog Day
Because of the frog plague + It’s Wednesday My Dudes memes
ETA: i wanna see a meme with a bunch of frogs rushing at Pharaoh shouting it’s Wednesday
SAY NO MORE
Friend: How can you be sure your cat is not antisemitic?
Self: This is a fair point. She has literally stepped on the name of G-d before when she has decided that my looking at a siddur is a distraction from the important work of loving her.
That being said, I think I can be sure she is not antisemitic because she does not realize that people believe in any G-d(s) other than her, which means she would be unaware of Judaism. You can’t hate something you don’t know exists, right?
Friend: And maybe she was trying to use one of her paws as a yad when pointing to the name of G-D.
Self: My cat can lien Torah. It must be time to throw her a bat mitzvah.
Friend: Cat Mitzvah*
What will her Purrsha be?
Self: I’ll make it happen. I’m sure my rabbi would be thrilled to have a cat in shul.
I Googled “what parsha should a cat have” and this came up: http://www.chabad.org/…/1008420/jewish/Feeding-Animals.htm I think she would concur that it is very important the conregation hear about the importance of feeding animals, given that her life mission is to be fed.
(Also there is apparently a midrash in which Noah is late feeding a lion and is injured. The rabbis must have had cats. There is no other explanation of their understanding of feline psychology.)
Friend: What minhag does your cat follow for Pesach? Does she eat KITTENyot?
Me: She’s a Cataite, clearly - cats are from Egypt, after all - so she relies on her own interpretation. Which is fitting because cats are not fans of authority, so I doubt she would be in support of the sanhedrin.
The timing of eating the Paschal lamb: Berakhot PI D9 Aa. Koren Talmud Bavli, Steinsaltz commentary, p 55 - 56.
Our passover menu:
APPETIZER
- Brined anchovies, blood oranges, pickled fennel on endive
- Rosé champagne
SEDER
- Hard-boiled eggs
- Whole-wheat shmurah matzah
- Charoset of dried apricots, dried cherries, pistachios, coconut, orange-flower water, and muscadet
- Arugula (karpas) salad with citrus and fennel
MAIN
- Roasted bone-in leg of lamb marinated with mint-honey-garlic
- Roasted small purple potatoes & artichoke hearts with lemon-mint gremolata
- Lemony fava bean stew with dill
DESSERT
- Black rice & coconut milk pudding with vanilla, cardamom, and rosewater; served with berries in a spiced red wine sauce and coconut cream
- coconut macaroons
- almond macarons
- champagne
- Pok Pok Som drinking vinegars, sparkling water, & various aromatic bitters for non-al mocktails
- (That’s chicory instead of romaine, but it’s one of the allowed bitter vegetables allowed in the Talmud. And yes, we put an orange on the seder plate. The lamb shank is in the leg of lamb nearby.)
SEDER
- Whole wheat shmurah matzah (SO GOOD)
- Turkish-style charoset: dried apricot, dried cherry, pistachios, coconut, cardamom, Muscat, orange flower water
Iraqi charoset: date syrup with almonds(We forgot to pick this up.)- Chicory & arugula salad with blood oranges (GET IT? BLOOD), grapefruit, fennel, and hard-boiled eggs; olive-oil, honey, and meyer lemon dressing.
SOUP
- bouillabaisse consommé with tiny gefilte fish balls on a stick (like a non-shellfish concentrated bouillabaisse martini)
- fingerling potatoes (1 per person) sliced & roasted, dabbed with a touch of rouille and salmon caviar
DINNER
- Strong but not too strong reds: Highway 12 Reserve Syrah, a portuguese, and a TJ reserve merlot.
- roast bone-in leg of lamb (opposite of vegan)
- stew of fava beans, lemon, and dill (vegan)
- carrot-zucchini ribbon salad with mustard vinaigrette (vegan)
- salad of roasted beets and spring peas with minty-lemony avocado dressing (vegan – pureed with a little water to get a creamy green-goddess style texture)
DESSERT
- coconut-cardamom-vanilla “panna cotta” with rose confit centers and rose petals on top and a splash of rosewater (vegan) (THESE ARE SO GOOD – just drop a teaspoon of jelly or jam into each serving.)
- French macarons
- rose, pomegranate-pistaschio, and honey-almond Turkish Delights (vegan)
- Espresso
- Slivovitz Dry Creek Distillery blue plumb brandy
– Post-dinner. Those bottles are aromatic bitters that we added to seltzer & pok pok som drinking vinegar mocktails. And maybe I added some of the lavender bitters to my sip of plum brandy.
Great for Pesach! Creamy, velvety, reasonably light, and no dairy. Serves 6 - 10 depending on the size of the molds you use.
- 2 cans light coconut milk
- ¼ c + 2 tbps sugar
- 1 tbsp vanilla
- ½ tsp ground cardamom
- 2 tsp agar powder (or 2 tbsp agar flakes if you’re using those)
- 2 tbsp arrowroot powder
- Silicone molds – you can use cupcake molds, cannelé molds,pyramid molds, or any shape you’d like. But use silicone – it will make your life much easier. You can also use individual ceramic / glass dessert cups or soufflé cups without unmolding them at the end.
Whisk all the ingredients into a 2-quart pot. Let it rest for 10 minutes; this gives the agar a chance to soften. Turn the heat on low; bring to a boil. Boil for about 5 minutes.
Put your molds on a metal tray – you won’t be able to move them individually once they’re filled with liquid! Fill each mold with the coconut milk mixture. (A soup ladle works well for this.) Cover the molds with plastic wrap. Place in the fridge for at least 6-8 hours.
Unmold onto plates. You can put sauce under the individual panna cottas (if you’re using a decorative shape this can be nice), or spoon sauce over them. Be creative!
Berry coulis
- 1-2 packs of frozen (organic) berries
- 1 tbsp arrowroot powder
- 1-2 tbsp sugar, depending on the berry; to your taste
- 1-2 tbsp liquor, per your preference.
- Other seasonings – try black pepper with strawberry or cardamom with blueberry.
Put everything in a pot. Gently bring to a boil. The berries will break down. Blend with a hand blender and strain through a mesh colander to make a coulis. Or don’t bother and serve a rustic sauce. Let it cool for a bit so the arrowroot powder can thicken it up a little.