VintageLittle Shop of Horrors Stickers Ranked by Rick Moranis’ Sex Appeal
Hi, I’m Roswell, and I’m horny for Rick Moranis.
Recently, my friend Pat sent me a fuckload of Little Shop of Horrors stickers from 1986.
Each pack contains a piece of thirty year old bubble gum.
It tastes really bad.
But we’re not here to talk about my mistakes; we’re here to talk about God’s mistake–the mistake of making me so incredibly attracted to Rick Moranis.
Let’s begin.
This Rick Moranis is not very sexy at all. He clearly doesn’t want that thing in his mouth. The lack of consent immediately turns me off, but I will give him one point for kissable lips. 1/10.
A reasonably fuckable Moranis. He’s doing that Vaudeville rubberface thing that I’m big into, but this outfit could’ve used some shoulder pads and his hair looks kinda greasy. 3/10.
The doe eyes. The pouty lips. The loose curls stuck to his forehead with nervous sweat. Truly this would be a tremendously boneable Ricky M. were it not for the fact that I am very anti-gun. 4/10.
His nonthreatening posture and gentle smooch make me feel like he would tenderly nurture our many children. Thinking about having kids kills my boner. 5/10.
A classic Rick! This kind of goofball acting is what makes him so loveable. He looks like a math teacher who just realized he forgot Pi Day and that’s what does it for me, I guess. 7/10.
The rumpled collar and patented Moranis Confused Face really get me going, but the caption makes me think of someone with a Brooklyn accent screaming, “The X-Files!” while falling down a well. 8/10.
Oh, what I wouldn’t give to push Rick Moranis into a dentist’s chair and fill his cavities. I think this scene made me gay. 10/10.
I have experienced an erection lasting longer than four hours and need to seek immediate medical attention. 11/10.
The six best old movies I watched for the first time in 2018:
1.The Insider 2. Young Adult 3.Phantom Thread 4.The Man Who Would Be King 5.Training Day 6.Little Shop of Horrors
The seven best old movies I watched not for the first time in 2018:
1.Vertigo2.Beetlejuice3.The Truman Show4.Ghostbusters5.Inside Man6.Personal Shopper7.The Wolf of Wall Street
Every Rick Moranis movie I watched in 2018, ranked:
1.Ghostbusters2.Parenthood3.Honey, I Shrunk the Kids4.Little Shop of Horrors 5.Honey, We Shrunk Ourselves 6.Ghostbusters II7.Strange Brew 8.Honey, I Blew Up the Kid
Every Christopher Plummer movie I watched in 2018, ranked:
1.The Insider2.Inside Man 3.Beginners4.The Man Who Would Be King 5.All the Money in the World6.The Sound of Music 7.The Last Station 8.Dreamscape9.Boundaries10.Must Love Dogs
![[posts wips of drawings i finished weeks ago bc friends finally received them in the mail] Check Out](https://64.media.tumblr.com/49be31e357111aba614e445d9c877c80/tumblr_o01e1xmOii1u4cn13o1_1280.jpg "[posts wips of drawings i finished weeks ago bc friends finally received them in the mail] Check Out")
