TCF Summary Arc by Arc (Part 1/8)

Every TCF story arc in a nutshell

Volume 1: chapters 1-99

Transmigration
Cale: *randomly wakes up as a minor villain in a novel*
Cale: You mean I’m rich and I have reputation of being trash, with no responsibility or expectations??
Cale: PERFECT

Role Adjustment
Cale: (Being trash sure is great)
Cale: *is nice and polite to everyone*
Everyone: Young master smiled?? Young master gave a compliment?? Young master’s not breaking anything???
Cale: (Yep. No one suspects a thing)

Meeting the Protagonist
Cale: (Let’s change this character’s fate from the novel and avoid the plot altogether.)
Cale: Come with me, I’ll feed you. (So pls don’t beat me up)
Choi Han: *gratitude mode activated* I shall follow this man for the rest of my life
Cale: What
Choi Han: What

Establishing Power Base
Cale: Well if I want to survive I need a power-up of some kind
Cale: Depending on divine beings is a bad idea. Let’s just get an average-strength human power
Cale: *gets an extremely holy-looking shield power*
Cale: …
Cale: I’m sure this won’t bite me in the a** later

First Adoption
Kittens: *hungry and homeless*
Cale: Tsk.
Cale: *feeds them* (It’s to keep them quiet)
Cale: *gives them more food* (It’s not like I care)
Cale: *gives them medicine* (I don’t even like cats)
Cale: *takes them in* (They might be useful, I guess)
Cale:*spoils them* (Children are supposed to play and eat well)
Cale:*becomes a legit parent* (It’s not like this makes me a good person)

Starting the Journey
Deruth: So we thought we’d be sending Basen to the capital, but we’ll be sending you instead
Deruth: (My son has been in such a good mood lately, he might actually agree this time!)
Cale: (What is this?? I don’t want to go, that’s where the plot and danger happens!!)
Basen: *smol cute bro vibes* Big brother, it’s okay. I don’t mind if you go in my place
Cale: …
Cale: (Well f***)

Rescuing a Dragon
Cale: There you go, little dragon. Now go and live freely
Cale: (I have no intention of adopting THIS one. Way too much trouble)
Raon: *protective modeactivated* I shall follow this weak human everywhere, b-but it’s not like I like him or anything, b-baka!
Cale: (…so I got one more, huh)

Helping an Invalid
Cale: *collects another power which was Taylor’s in the novel*
Cale: Ok, I anonymously sent him enough info to change his storyline so he’ll survive this time. Let’s ignore him from n-
Taylor: Greetings!
Cale: (Well f***)
Cale: *helps him*
Taylor: *admiration mode activated*
Cale: (IGNORE)

Enter the Wolf Tribe
Cale: *chilling with the kids* Ah, slacker life is best-
Choi Han: *barges in* Cale-nim, we got plot on our hands!!
Cale: (Well f***)
Cale: *helps out Lock*
Lock: Thank you so much! Can you help my family, too?
Cale: I don’t want to.
Lock: Huh?
Cale: *adopts him and his siblings anyway*

Meeting the Crown Prince
Alberu: Young master Cale! A free spirit from such a noble family!
Cale: Your highness! The shining sun of our kingdom!
Alberu: …
Cale: …
Alberu: (…We both know we’re totally faking, right?)
Cale: (Right)
Alberu: (Let’s never meet again)
Cale: (Agreed)
*And so Began a Beautiful Friendship*

Plaza Terror Incident
Cale’s allies: Just sit back and relax. We’ll handle everything
Cale: I’m great at being still.
Cale: *saves the day with a holy-looking shield*
Everyone: HERO!!!
Cale: (Well f***)
Alberu: So you saved the day, what do you want as reward? Power? A medal?
Cale: Hell no. I take cash only
Alberu: Okay then…? *gives him a two-time use credit card to his personal bank account*
Alberu: (This is in no shape or form a bad idea. What could he possibly buy?)
Cale: *smirks* (You, sir, just made a big miscalculation)

Sea Encounters
Cale: *comes to the sea shore to pick up another power*
Cale: Well in the novel the Whales didn’t show up until like Volume 5, so I should be safe from the plot for no-
Toonka: Hi! My name is Bob.
Cale: (Well f***)
Paseton: *dying of poison* Save… me… please…
Cale: (WELL F***)
Cale: *helps both of them*
Cale: This much should be okay, right? (It’s not like I’m going to get involved any further…)

Field Trip to the Forest of Darkness
Witira: So I’m here to thank you for saving my brother
Cale: (I know that)
Witira: Who was there because we’re fighting the mermairds
Cale: (I know that too)
Witira: Who are using your territory’s resources to make themselves stronger
Cale: *spit-take*WHAT
Cale: *gets further involved*
Also Cale: Well, heeeello new power-up! *gets a bonus scamming power*

Unexpected Results
Cale: *suddenly realizes he’s got 2 Cats, a Dragon, 11 Wolf children, the protagonist, and a bunch of big shot alliances on his hands*
Cale: HOW did this even HAPPEN???

Buying the Magic Tower
Cale: Why am I buying a worthless wreck of a building for 10 billions? Boasting rights, obviously
Toonka: I 100% believe you! You’re such a good friend!
Cale: *loots the secret floor filled with riches and steals himself an architect*
Cale: Yes. I’m a very good friend, aren’t I
Toonka: *trust mode activated*
Cale: (IGNORE)

Returning from the Path of No Return
Litana: The legend said there was a dragon here who randomly shows up to grant people’s wishes. But I guess-
Cale:*randomly shows up* Hello, I’m here to save your Jungle from the fire
Litana: …
Litana: So the legend WAS true!
Cale: …Huh?

A Dragon’s Revenge
Everyone and their mother: Young master Cale is such a good, pure person!
Cale: *rents a torture dungeon*
Odeus: *terrified* (LIES! ALL LIES! THIS MAN IS NOT PURE OR INNOCENT AT ALL)
Cale: *helps his son overcome his trauma by getting back at his abuser*
Cale: So you see, this is why I’m absolutely not a good person
Cale’s group: (LIES.)

Getting to Know the Crown Prince Better
Cale: So anyway, I’ve figured out that you’re part Dark Elf. Here’s some dead mana from a motherf***ing dragon.
Alberu: …
Cale: What?
Alberu: Are you gonna blackmail me, or…?
Cale: Keep serving me as a bank account and that’ll do it, I think
Alberu: You sly bastard
Cale: Why thank you
Alberu: Get out of my office
Cale: With pleasure
Alberu: *reluctant trust mode activated*

Hit and Run, Cale-style
Cale: So now that’s over, I’m going to rest for a bi-
Ron: *shows up poisoned with his arm cut off*
Cale: …
Cale: Welp. Time to blow up an island, I guess
Cale: *goes on a war path*
Cale’s group: …
Cale: (My poor life. Why am I constantly surrounded by such crazy, vicious individuals?)

Running an Errand
Cale: *staring blankly into space*
The children: Is he okay?? Is he bored?? Is he sick??
Cale: (Ahhh, slacker life sure is best-)
Alberu: *calling* Are you free right now?
Cale: No
Alberu: Great! Anyway, go pick up something from the Dark Elves for me
Cale: No thank you
Alberu: If you won’t help me there’s a high chance I’m going to be exposed and die.
Cale: …
Cale: (Well f***)

Recruiting a Necromancer
Everybody: Necromancers are evil, dangerous beings. All fear their dark cursed powers
Cale: *looks at Mary*
Cale: There’s no reason not to adopt this child who is actually older than me.

End Volume 1.

[Index] [Next >]

TCF Summary Arc by Arc (Part 4/8)

Every TCF story arc in a nutshell

Volume 4: chapters 300-399

Whipper VS Mogoru Round 2 – Attack on Titan x Fullmetal Alchemist Crossover!
Cale: (Alright, just pretending to be on the Empire’s side to backstab them later. No prob-)
Raon: Honte is a zombie
Cale: Wait what
The Ancient Powers: And that’s black magic disguised as alchemy
Cale: What
The Ancient Powers: Also those golems are made out of people’s souls
Cale: WHAT
Litana: *video-calling* And the Empire is attacking the Jungle at this very moment!
Cale: *flips the table* Well f*** this s***
Adin: Wha-?
Cale: *chokes Adin* HEY LOOK EVERYONE, THIS GUY IS POSSESSED BY BLACK MAGIC
The Empire’s Soldiers: *confused as hell*
The Empire’s VIPs: (…well s***)
The Sun Twins: *enter*
The Empire’s VIPs: (Oh f***!)
Cale: *burns the golems*
Adin: So it WAS you!
Cale: Yeah, obviously b****. And whoever’s controlling Honte is the real Tower Master right
Honte: Bhuaha, fools, you shall all die! *blows up*
Cale:*saves the day with a holy-looking shield*
Everyone: *stops fighting out of shock*
The Ancient Powers: Cale why did you do that?? You have a freaking dragon
Cale: Reasons…?
The Ancient Powers: You lying tsundere. Just admit you care
Cale: Never
Clopeh: *recording everything in the background* ✨Legend…!✨
Cale: Now let’s go to the Jungle- *faints*
[Enemy Adin Fled the Battle!]
[You won! You earned the trust of the Empire’s Sun God believers!]
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 13 (Double Combo!)*

Saving the Jungle Round 2 – Naruto x Encanto Crossover!
Tasha: Young master Cale, we dark elves sure love free dead mana and all, but this is just too much…
Cale: Don’t worry about it, I’ll eat it
Tasha: Wait wha-
Cale: *Mokuton-no-jutsus the trees*
Adin: *video-calling* So what is it that you want, Cale Henituse?
Cale: A slacker life
Adin: Ha! Good one
Cale: No really, I am serious
Adin: Yeah right
Cale: (Why doesn’t he believe me?!)
Cale: I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
Adin: Good luck *sends a signal to blow up the airship*
Eruhaben: How about no
Cale: Nice! Free airship
Eruhaben: (…this greedy bastard)
Cale:*falls over from hunger*
Everyone: *panics* Young master Cale-!
Eruhaben: Don’t worry, I got this. *picks up Cale like a bag of potatoes*
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 14*

Rebellion in the Empire Plot – Start!
Cale: So let’s make it look like I’m hurt so that Adin doesn’t know I’m coming for him
Alberu: Alright
Also Alberu: *to everyone* Cale’s dead
Everyone: GASP!
Cale: Wait what? Quit telling people I’m dead!
Alberu: Sometimes, I can still hear his voice…
Cale’s group: *sneaks into the Bell Tower*
Adin: *casually drinking dead mana and looking down at a mountain of corpses* I shall monologue about my evil plans because I’m alone and 100% safe here
Cale’s group: *records everything*
Adin: Oh and I could really use that healing power from the Mercenary King
Cale: *adds meeting the Mercenary King to his to-do list*
Cale’s group: *displays the footage of Adin being evil all over the Empire*
Adin:*Surprised Pikachu Face*

Overthrowing the Empire – Adin and the Lich
The Dark Elves: Hahaha, more free dead mana!!
Cale: Ok Choi Han, this is it. Beat up that b****
Choi Han: *cracks knuckles* Yes Cale-nim
Adin: Wait wha-
Choi Han: *beats him up*
Cale: *casually eating a breadroll in the background* (Ah, so refreshing…)
[Choi Han is Evolving! Congratulations! Your Despair Aura had evolved into Aura of Despair and Happiness!]
Cale:*thumbs up*
Cale’s group: *evacuating the civilians and causing chaos all over the place*
Bernard: Enough! Let’s resolve this calmly and peacefully
Rex: Just let him hug you first
Bernard: Wait wha-
Jack: *exposes Sir Bernard as the true Tower Master*
Bernard: Well it doesn’t matter. I shall kill all of you anyway
Hannah & Mary: *charge*
[Hannah Used the Divine Item of the Sun God! It’s Super Effective!]

Battle at the Empire – Final Boss Reveal!
[A Wild White Star Appeared!]
White Star: *telepathically projecting at Cale* (Who are you?)
Cale: (…does he expect me to yell my name over the battlefield, or…?)
White Star: I shall make you eat this baby dragon next to you and turn you into a Dragon Slayer like me
Cale: *hugs Raon legit scared for the first time*
Eruhaben: You DARE threaten my children, b****??
Eruhaben: *goes on a war path*
White Star: *uses the Sky Attribute for the first time*
The Ancient Powers: That is like, super deadly
Cale: (Well f***)
Cale: RUN!!!
Cale’s group: *shocked* (…but we never had to retreat before??)
Cale: I shall use the Divine Item-
Hannah: Do you even know how?!
Cale: …
Hannah: …You dumb sacraficial bastard
Cale’s group: *defends together with the ✨Power of Friendship✨*
Everyone: We survived!!!
Cale: Call Alberu- *faints*
[Enemy White Star Fled the Battle!]
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 15*

Meeting the Mercenary King
Cale: *wakes up* Oh hi Alberu what are you doing here
Alberu: *has spent past 2 weeks cleaning up Cale’s mess* What do you THINK, you dumb bastard??
Cale: Thank you your highness. I gotta go to the Eastern Continent now
Alberu: (And this workaholic claims he wants to be a SLACKER??) *hands him intel* Ok here’s what we got on the Mercenary King
Cale: Thanks bye
Alberu: (…I will definitely get revenge on that headache inducing bastard)
Cale’s group: *arrives at Cale’s inn*
Cale: So we’re looking for the Mercenary Ki-
Ron: Oh him, he’s right here
Cale: Are you kidding me
Bud: *hugs Cale* FRIEND!
Cale: ???
Bud: *puts on glasses* Wait you’re not my friend. But you smell like an alcoholic, so you must be my friend!
Cale: You mistook me for the White Star, didn’t you
Bud: Yup
Cale: You want to kill him too?
Bud: Absolutely! Since he’s trying to kill me anyway
Cale: Join us. We got alcohol
Bud: Sure!
Cale: (…another lunatic on board, huh)

The Wind Island
Cale’s group: We’re all going
Bud: Only the person with wind attribute can enter tho?
Cale’s group: *waits at the entrance like a bunch of puppies*
Cale: *enters the Wind Island*
The Ancient Powers: Let us tell you exposition about the Ancient Times
Cale: …So basically, the White Star is a copycat of an ancient lunatic with the Sky Attribute who tried to take over the world
The Ancient Powers: Yup. And there’s another helpful item for you to take from here
Cale: Oh that’s nice. So I just grab it?
The Ancient Powers: Uh, about that…
Cale: (Well f***)
Cale: *gets trapped in a traumatic illusion of living in a world where everybody else died for a week*
Cale: Welp. Time to blow up an island, I guess
Cale: *sets the sea on fire*
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 16*

The Directory
Bud: I’m your secretary now.
Cale: But we didn’t even have that drinking contest-?
Ron: *looms menacingly in the background*
Cale: Nevermind
Bud: Yeah so this is the record of a 1,000 years, so there’s no way to-
Cale: *memorizes almost 10,000 books in a week* Got it
Bud: Wait what
Cale: I think the White Star was the first Mercenary King?
Bud: (Well f***)
Bud: Welp. Time to blow up the Directory, I guess
Ron: Let’s use this for the dramatic return of the Molan Household
Ron & Beacrox: *make epic comeback Michael Bay-style*

The Castle of Light
Eruhaben: Yeah so this castle has been off limits since the last Dragon Lord died, so there’s not way to-
[Dragon Crown (Key Item) Has been Activated!]
Eruhaben: Wait what
*The Castle of Light Opens*
Sheritt: *to Raon* Welcome, my child. Now let me tell you exposition about your origins
Cale: …So basically, the White Star is a reincarnator because he was cursed for breaking the vow of protecting this castle?
Sheritt: Yes. And my second child is probably dead
Everyone: That motherf***ing bastard.
Sheritt: Agreed. I’m going to rip him to pieces if I ever see him
[Enemy White Star wants to fight!]
Sheritt: Perfect. *goes on a war path*
[Cale Used the Dragon Crown! It’s Super Effective!]
Cale: So we’re safe under our defences and have a back exit, while the White Star believes we’re trapped and exhausted… Let’s go around and smack that bastard from behind. Also Raon Mother’s-nim – we’re taking you with us
Sheritt: But I’m stuck in the castle?
Cale: Let’s take the castle then. Where do you want to put it? I’m like, super rich
Sheritt: *Surprised Pikachu Face*
[Dragon Lord Castle Acquired!]
Cale’s group: *enters the Dragon Slayer Village*
Cale: *finds the book titled as the same novel he got transmigrated into with the same author*
Choi Han: Uncle…?
Cale: (WTF???)
Cale: Nevermind, let’s deal with this later. Everybody ready to fight?
Bud: Hey, why am I not fighting?! I’m not baggage! I’m a freaking Sword Master!
Cale: You’re right. I’m the baggage.
Bud: Ah, Cale, don’t talk about yourself like tha-
Cale: Shut up and carry me
Bud: ???
The Cat Tribe: *looks at On & Hong* Oh look, it’s those dirty trash!
Cale: (So you have chosen… death)
Cale’s group: *smacks the White Star from behind*
[Enemy White Star Fled the Battle!]
[Congratulations! You did not bleed or faint this time either!!]

Back to the Empire
Hannah: So the Empire is planning another rebellion, but a bad one
Cale: You wanna bathe in the blood of your enemies again?
Hannah: YES
Cale: Great. We’re getting rid of all the remaining alchemist towers. Everybody ready?
Everyone: Yup
Cale: Time to destroy the Empire again *priest mode on*
Plavin: Oh it’s you, what can I do for you?
Cale: Gather a ton of magic stones for me and I’ll arrange your meeting with the new Pope (On the execution block, lol)
Plavin: I’ll do it!!
Cale: Perfect.

God of Death sends Cale a Fan Letter
Cage: Um, young master Cale…? The God of Death sent you a note for some reason
God of Death: Dear Kim Rok Soo. You were supposed to die instead of your best friends. That’s why I think you’re cool. BTW, in a few months you’ll either die or return to your old world, so good luck
Cale: …
Cage: …Is it something bad?
Cale: No? *just inwardly had a whole PTSD flashback about it*
Alberu: *suspicious* Really. Then what did it say
Cale: (Let’s tell them the least concerning thing)
Cale: He said I was supposed to die
Everybody: *freaks out* …That motherf***ing God of Death!!!
Cale: (…What’s with them?)
Choi Han: I’ll be visiting Syrem in prison to get his ancient powers
Cale: Sure. Go for it
Choi Han: *comes back* I got them. …Also, your highness, there’s a hole in the prison wall now
Alberu: *headache mode activate* (Those lunatics… Cale’s people only eat and destroy things)
Also Alberu: *does not consider himself one of those lunatics. He’s wrong.*

Rebellion in the Empire, the Sequel
Cale:*steals the magic stones from Plavin and replaces them with rocks* (Ah, so refreshing…)
Eruhaben:*video-calling* Cale, Choi Han just fainted
Cale: What?! Why?
Eruhaben: The God of Death sent a note saying he’s getting a vision? Something about Choi Jung Soo
Cale: *realizes his transmigrator status is going to get exposed* …That motherf***ing God of Death!!!

End Volume 4.

[< Previous] [Index] [Next >]

TCF Summary Arc by Arc (Part 3/8)

Every TCF story arc in a nutshell

Volume 3: chapters 200-299

1st Battle – Henituse Territory
[Enemy Clopeh wants to fight!]
Clopeh: I have an army
Cale: We have a necromancer
Clopeh: Wait wha-
Mary: BONE DRAGON SMASH
[Raon used Shield! It’s Super Effective!]
Cale: Choi Han, I choose you!
Clopeh: Wait is that a sword master??
Syrem: Wait is that a dragon??
Cale: Wait is that a dragon slayer??
The Wyvern Brigade: *gets obliterated*
[Enemy Syrem Fled the Battle!]
[Enemy Clopeh Got Captured!]
[You won! You earned High Morale for the Roan Kingdom!]
Cale: The shield did not break
Everyone: *simp mode levels up* We got a national slogan now
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 6*

2nd Battle – the Ocean
Mage & Healer: We’re special because we got red stars on our uniforms
Cale: B**** please, you don’t even get names
Mage & Healer: Wait wha-
The Fleet: *gets obliterated*
[Enemy Syrem Got Captured!]
[You won! You earned the unfailing trust of the Roan Kingdom!]
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 7*

Aftermath at Roan Kingdom
Amiru: So the churches want to burn Mary on a stake
Cale: Well f*** them
Alberu: And the nobles want to give you a medal
Cale: WELL F*** THEM
Alberu: *shrugs* Fair enough
Cale: Just please let the soldiers eat?? (I am SO hungry! ;_;)
Everyone: *deeply touched* C-commander Cale…!
Cale: (Surely after the war, everyone will forget about me)
Everyone: *simp mode levels up*

Clopeh’s Conversion
Clopeh: *gets tortured and dis-Armed* (drum roll)
Cale: How about you tell me everything you know?
Clopeh: *realizes Cale = priest Cale*
Clopeh: (I can make a religion out of this)
Cale: Now tell your father to surrender
Clopeh: Father, this esteemed sir is a god
Cale: (WTF???)

Grand Nobles Meeting
Nobles: We can’t send help to some other country! Think about our positions- I mean, our kingdom’s position!
Cale’s allies: *show up all wearing black* The kingdom is fine
Alberu: *also in black* Yes, we even collaborated on the color scheme, aren’t we fashionable?
Nobles: (…Well s***)
Cale: Peace out, b****es

3rd Battle – Caro Kingdom
Valentino: *gratitude mode activated* Thank you for coming to help!
Cale: *awkward*
Adin: Also I’m here
Cale: *pissed*
The Sun Church: You got a necromancer so you’re not qualified for us to help you
Cale: (…I’m going to end their whole careers)
The Bear Tribe: Fear us, we got dead mana bombs!
Valentino: Sun Church, can’t you do something?!
The Sun Church: But that would like, hurt, so no
Valentino: …you have literally ONE JOB.
Cale: Well f*** them, your highness. I’ve got a solution
Valentino: What solution…?
Cale: Dragon simps
The Dark Elves: Look, it’s free dead mana!
The Bear Tribe: Wait wha-
The Bear Tribe: *gets obliterated*
Cale: Looks like we’re done h-
Dragon Half-Blood: *shows up* Gasp! That aura! Are you a dragon?? Cale: (Well f***)
[Enemy Dragon Half-Blood Fled the Battle!]
[You won! You earned the gratitude of the Caro Kingdom!]
*Cale mistaken as a dragon counter: 4*
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 8*

Aftermath at Caro Kingdom
Cale: Speaking of dragon simps - Pendrick, you’re up
Pendrick: Huh?
Cale: You’re the healer now
Pendrick: *sweats* O-okay? If the dragon wants me to-?
Cale: Wonderful. Valentino, Adin and the Empire made the dead mana bombs. You hungry for some delicious REVENGE?
Valentino: *pissed*…Starving.
Cale: Perfect. Now I’m off, someone’s been messing with my backyard entrance

Expansion to the Eastern Continent
Mountain Bandits: *carving a statue out of a 10,000 year old seal* We’re the strongest people in town!!
Cale’s group: *shows up*
Bandit Leader: Ha! Look at those weak-
Cale: Beacrox
Beacrox: With pleasure
Beacrox: *beats him up*
Cale: You work for us now
Mountain Bandits: *terrified* Y-yes sir!
Cale: (…What’s with them?) And you’ll be ruling the Eastern underworld under Ron
Mountain Bandits: Huh?
Cale: But first we’ll be fixing your etiquette
Mountain Bandits: HUH?
Cale: *starts an inn business*
Cale: Why the “Hope and Adventure Loving Inn”…?
Cale: …Because we hope to backstab all the bad guys, and love the adventure of looting them

Going Back to Roan Kingdom
Alberu: *headache mode on* Cale, can you please pick up your unruly children from the capital?
Cale: …What did you two do?
Choi Han & Mary: *picking up fights with dumb nobles*
Choi Han & Mary: *innocently* Nothing dad!
Cale: Whatever. I need to talk to the World Tree again
World Tree: Guess what, Raon’s mom’s OP so Raon’s also gonna be very OP
Cale: But he’s already OP?
World Tree: Like, Dragon Lord OP.
Cale: I see. …Wait wha-
World Tree: *Windows shutdown noises*
Cale: Darn it
Lock: Young master Cale, I can’t go berserk ;_;
Cale: Doesn’t matter. We’re adults, we can’t just rely on children to fight for us in battle
Raon: Really?
Cale: Yes, why-?
Raon: *enters first growth phase*
Cale: (Well f***)

4th Battle – the Gorge of Death
[Enemy Dragon Half-Blood wants to fight!]
Super Rock: Are you trying to sacrifice yourself
Cale: No
Super Rock: Are you trying to sacrifice yourself
Cale: Maybe?
Super Rock: Are you trying to sacrifice yourself
Cale: …Yes
Super Rock: Wrong answer
Cale: Wait wha-
Super Rock: *turns the battle around*
Cale: (…So all the stress he gave me for solid 100 chapters was for NOTHING?!?)
Dragon Half-Blood: So you’re going to kill me now, huh?
Cale: Nope. I haven’t even unlocked your tragic backstory yet
Dragon Half-Blood: …Huh?
[Enemy Dragon Half-Blood Got Captured!]
[Enemies Flame Dwarves and Bear Tribe also Got Captured!]
[You won! You earned the gratitude of the Breck Kingdom!]
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 9*

Aftermath at the Gorge of Death
Eruhaben: So you’ve used up all your water power and your power plate’s broken, which means you have 3 days ‘til you explode
Cale: Ok
Alberu: What’s going-
Cale: This is Raon, my adopted dragon son
Alberu: Huh?
Cale: And this is Eruhaben, my adopted dragon grandpa
Eruhaben: 'Sup
Alberu: Huh??
Cale: Also I’m going to explode in 3 days unless I get a water ancient power
Alberu: HUH???
Eruhaben: Luckily I know where it is
Cale: Sure let’s go
Alberu: *headache mode on* (That bastard… I’ll get him for this later)

Fixing Up Cale’s Plate
Cale: *gets the water ancient power*
Cale: Great, that means I’m healed, right?
The Ancient Powers: Uh, about that…
Cale: Son of a-! *pukes blood and hurts like crazy*
Cale: (…At least my friends aren’t here to-)
Cale’s group: *sees everything through video-call*
Cale: (Well f***)
Cale’s group: *casually destroys several palaces out of frustration*
Cale: (…I don’t even wanna know)
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 10*

Rebellion in the Empire Plot – Begin!
Roan Kingdom: *wins the war*
The Empire: *declares war against the Whipper Kingdom*
Roan Kingdom’s Alliance: (You, sir, just made a big miscalculation)
Cale: *masterfully plotting a bloodless rebellion*

Back to the Eastern Continent
Cale: Time for some peace and justice
Choi Han: *confusion*
Cale: …I mean time to mess with Arm
Choi Han: Oh, are we looting them again?
Cale: Close, but not quite
Some Corrupted Guild: (I just wish a Dragon showed up and ripped all those Arm bastards to shreds!)
Cale’s group: *shows up*
Some Corrupted Guild: Who are you?!
Choi Han: We. Are. The. Real. Arm!
Cale: *facepalm*
Cale’s group: *loots corrupted Guilds and sets them all up against Arm*
Eruhaben: So what will you do with the slowly dying, 900-year-old, homicidal Dragon Half-Blood that you’ve captured?
Cale: Put him on cleaning duty, obviously
Dragon Half-Blood: …Huh??
Eruhaben: Sounds reasonable. And what are you going to do next?
Cale: Throw some money away
Eruhaben: You mean, like on alcohol or-?
Cale: *literally burns a ton of money*
Eruhaben: …
Eruhaben: I’m too old for this

Back to Whipper Kingdom
Cale: *menacingly* Do you wish to live?
Flame Dwarves: *terrified* Y-yes…?
Cale: (…What’s with them?) Great. You’re awesome craftsmen, make us some firebirds
Flame Dwarves: *respect mode activated*
Cale: Do you also wish to live?
Bear Tribe: We sure do
Cale: (Big bait will sure work out great) Excellent.
Toonka: FRIEND!!!
Cale: (…not really?)
Toonka: *pissed but helpless* Our bastard of a King wants to sell out 100,000 citizens as slaves to the Empire just to save his own skin
Cale: …So what’s the problem?
Toonka: Huh?
Cale: *totally-not-being-a-friend* Bro. Just do your thing. I got ya back
Toonka: !!!
Toonka: *smashes through the door* OBJECTION!
Cale: …you could have spared the door tho

5th Battle – Whipper Kingdom VS Mogoru Empire
[Enemy Huten wants to fight!]
Cale: *priest mode on*
The Empire: Ha! There’s no way those weaklings can stand in our wa-
Flame Dwarves: *send firebirds out*
Cale: *sets the battlefield on fire*
The Empire: Wait wha-
The Empire: *gets obliterated*
[Enemy Huten Got Captured!]
[You won! You earned the gratitude of the Whipper Kingdom!]
[Congratulations! You did not bleed or faint this time!!]

Working with the Empire – an Among Us Playthrough
Cale & Alberu: *Impostor mode on*
Adin: (That priest in Navigation… Cale is kinda sus)
Alberu: *shows the video of Cale puking blood* It can’t be Cale, I was there at the Med Scan with him. He’s super fragile right now
Cale: That’s right. I’m of very fragile health
Adin: Oh no, our poor hero… (Score, he’s totally dying!)
Cale: Yes. But since I’m a hero, I’ll still be helping
Adin: We’re so grateful! (I hope he coughs a lot of blood)
Cale: *puts out his own fire*
Cale: (Oh how nice, no blood!)
Sky Eating Water: Uh, about that…
Cale: Son of a-! *coughs rivers of blood*
*Cale coughs blood and/or faints counter: 11*

End Volume 3.

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So we’re in the town, we went back after the monster guy got magicked away. Next day we decide “This river has been out of water for awhile we should go solve that” and we start following the river. I, having read many warrior cats, make a joke “This is where we fight the beavers for the lake water” and then there’s ACTUALLY beavers with a giant dam.

These beavers are special though. They’re the size of horses (Big enough to decapitate Kobold if he got bit fun fact, the dm actually told me they counted on me being in stealth because I’ve yet to fail a stealth roll). So Irenar decides to use magic missile on them. Their player thinks magic missile will blow up the dam. But it’s a missile in the “thrown projectile” way instead of the “exploding rocket” way and so it doesn’t destroy the dam, and just upsets the beavers.

The beavers are, of course, not happy about being attacked and charge us. So we start fighting them, and Kobold panics a bit and defaults back to the first spell he learned, color spray. Which as you can imagine is not the best spell for firing into a group of beavers and your party. Luckily, instead of color spray, he casts guiding bolt. He doesn’t actually KNOW that spell, which is worrying, but he’s kinda in the middle of something so he can’t think too hard about that. He hides.

There’s some more fighting, Leona summons some weird tentacle magic, Val discovers the insides of the beavers are rotting by killing one, irenar keeps having wild magic surges, which cause one of the beavers to heal to full health twice, and ALMOST caused all the cloth in the area (So the clothes Val was wearing and possibly Irenar I don’t actually know what her armor is like) to turn invisible, but it was one off the magic table, instead all our coins teleport on top of one beaver. The beavers do this weird thing where they blur and then you get bit without them seeming to have moved and their bites are poisonous when that happens, I don’t remember the fight too well I’m sorry. And the fight is very abruptly ended when Kobold sprints to the dam, and destroys it with shatter. Luckily, the only ones who fail their dex save to not get swept away are the two living beavers. Also luckily we got our money back on the way back to town (We used the river to get there).

At that point, we run into Marcel, who invited us to some fancy party earlier. (His whole deal SEEMS to be that he got a bunch of money off artificial silver (Which has a lot of magic uses) and now he invites poor people to parties, buys stuff from them, hires local musicians, argues with other nobles about that stuff) and he’s like “I was informed you guys were travelers and might not have fancy clothes, so I’ve brought tailors to help” so we all get fancy dresses (Yes even Kobold, he’s fine with this. He doesn’t really know anything about fancy clothing and what kinds are for what, and even if he DID he’d be like “Gender roles kinda cringe” and done it anyways) and then we go to the party, it’s all fancy, there’s lots of food, Kobold knows what none of it is, Irenar dances for four hours, Leona eats an entire baby pig (It was cooked, not a live one dw), Kobold learns that Guiding bolt is a cleric spell, which is weird because he’s not a cleric, and then we all black out for… unknown reasons… and that’s where the session ended