Harry, Hermione, and Ron are killed early in their search for Horcruxes. Voldemort orders a full invasion of Hogwarts to find the remaining ones. In a panic, Hogwarts is evacuated. One student slept through the evacuation order: 4th year American transfer student Kevin McCallister.
Authonomy It’s been a while since I used this website in particular, but it’s useful for helpful critique and to get your original works out there. If your book get on the top five list at the end of the month Harper Collins will read it for possible publication.
How to write Funeral Directors I’ve read quite a few fanfics where they just have funeral directors slapping clothes on a body and calling it a day. As a former funeral services major I can tell you that’s not the only thing they do.
We have been inactive for quite some time now. I did receive many chat messages letting me know that the ask box had been closed. It is now open, so feel free to submit any questions that you may have.
As a young kid Person A sees their own death and the exact time and date. Live their life fearlessly and passionately until the date comes. And goes.
Now Person A is suddenly left without a plan for their life or even a dream, but completely consumed by an overwhelming fear of a future they never thought they’d have to deal with, combined with a mounting anxiety at the thought of all the reckless shit they have survived - apparently - by dumb sheer luck and not by fate.
Now they seek out a life coach/priest/guru/therapist to help them find a path, dare to live life and sort out their mess. Enter Person B and Slow Burn Romance.
Tell me when did you fall in love with your sins? When did the crimson red running down your arms become heaven instead of hell and when did the lies become a bed in which you laid yourself down willingly, one covered with thorns yet you only focused on the roses , a house of shadows and of curses to which you should have shut your ears off to but you sat down and listened , sang along to the chorus of despairs and laughed at the pain which drenched you like a never ending waterfall. They told me angels turn bad too and then they’re called devils but looking at you makes me think that angels never existed , it was always just the devils , disguised in a certain way , till the world breaks them enough , like an egg hatching , till the devil comes out, forgive me lord for i have sinned , after all , I’ve always been but a sinner .
A meme compilation, theme: emails and how they found you
Part 2
Part 3
I remember getting home from work and posting this out of spite because i just had a day full of sending so many goddamn emails
i just read another Victorian novel and was reminded that people have felt this way since the widespread promulgation of mail and literacy and Victorian women especially were expected to just sit in their house for hours every day, hand-writing replies to their fucking correspondence, most of which wasn’t even from friends but was like, obligatory “i hope this missive finds you well” sort of shit. it was so distasteful a chore that when your friends were at your house for lunch or something they would offer to help you with it just to get it over with sooner
So I made a whole bunch of quick x reader oneshots here are a handful of them so. Enjoy I guess.
Jade Harley
You were feeling childish today, so you decided to take a day trip to the park! What fun! You decided to ride a scooter to the park with your decorated backpack with some food and your sketch pad and some coloring stuff, you had planned to ride around the park then take a break and draw. And that you did! You rode your scooter for about half an hour before parking it next to a tree and you walk to a bench and sit, eating your snacks and sketching some people’s dogs as they walked by. You felt like something was going to happen, so you looked around and suddenly saw at the tree you parked your scooter at some jerks were stealing it! You quickly set your stuff down and bolt to the scooter, but before you could get there some girl decided to drop kick the guy stealing your bike, causing him to fall over she took the scooter from him and said, quite harshly “This doesn’t belong to you.” And they guy got up and ran, yelling “You’re crazy lady!” As he seemed to disappear away from view. You walked up to the lady and she handed you your scooter “Here you go! Earlier I saw you riding it and then i saw that guy taking your bike, but I didn’t see him with you earlier. Then I saw you at the bench over there and you seemed to not know what’s going on so I got him for you!” She smiled this HUGE freaking beautiful smile, you smiled back “Thanks! You really didn’t need to though. I have more scooters at home if he took it anywho.” You shrugged and looked at your scooter “Well maybe we could go ride our scooters together sometime!” She says, then started to walk toward the bench you were previously sitting at “I’m Jade by the way!” She called before taking one of your pencils and writing down her chumhandle really quick before skipping off “Text me sometime (Y/N)!” “S-Sure?” You called back, a bit dumbstruck. Well guess you made a new friend… wait how did she know your name-
Dave Strider
You were in a shop that your friend dragged you to, and you hated this shop for more than one reson. It was a sex toy shop. You were so disturbed and desperate to get out and your friend wouldn’t let you stay in the car. So you were stuck. Suddenly you heard another distressed person in the aisle over, so when your friend wasn’t looking you peaked over, to see two boys with shades on, inside, odd. “Bro why am I here.” “So you don’t mess up my stuff at home.” The shorter of the two groaned again, as the taller one looked away you whispered “Hey!” At the shorter blonde, and he looked over at you “Wanna get out if here?” You whisper-shouted. He looked over at the taller one then back at you, and he bolted for you. The both of you left the store and walked to another nearby one, talking about yourselfs and stuff you both had in common. He was currently talking about his caretaker’s ‘Job’. “-and I kid you not he threw it right at me. (Y/N) stop laughing it’s not funny dude.” You couldn’t help yourself, suddenly you both got texts from the people who brought you into the store in the first place, you quickly traded chumhandles and went your separate ways.
Rose Lalonde
You were chilling on your roof, your house had woods behind it and a lot of people passed by or went into the woods, and your family didn’t mind at all. You were half asleep when you heard two people arguing “Dave just admit we’re lost.” “No no- I know where we are-” “David I’ve never even seen this house in my life what if we’re trespassing!?” You laugh to yourself a bit and sit up, looking over the roof to see two people who looked almost exactly alike. You called out to them and they both looked up at you, the girl spoke first “Hello, I apologize are we trespassing? We are kind of lost.” She smiled a bit, the one who she called 'Dave’ simply nodded. You hopped off the building(dont worry it’s not to high off the ground, about 6-7 feet off the ground) and made your way over to them, turns out they were simply hiking, so you vave both of them your chumhandle so you could guide them if they got lost on the way back. You took a look at the map they are reading from and show them where they are. Apparently their just on the other side of town and somehow walked all the way around through the woods. You said your Goodbyes, and trust me, that girl is not going to let it down that you helped and will 100% try to do something to thank you.
John Egbert
You were at the store, looking for a movie because your friend wanted to come over that evening and watch one with you. Somehow you wandered to a section full of weird looking movies and you let out a panicked/confused whine. Apparently someone heard you and walked over “Hi, uh, are you alright?” He asked nervously, obviously the boy didn’t have much social interaction so he was a bit nervous. “Yeah I’m fine… I’m just looking for a good movie for my friend-” you said smiling at him, he seemed to light up at this “I know some good movies! Follow me.” He said cheerfully as he dragged you around the store, and for a good while you talked about each other and some other things. When you finally had picked out a movie he offered you to come over to his house sometime and you two could watch a movie together. You thought this was a great idea and exchanged Chumhandles before you left the store.
The equivalent of Antarctic research stations but in fantasy worlds like for example there’s an evil terrible region of rotting and nightmares but like nine miles from the edge there’s a very ugly little building optimistically called Observation Center 1 and it’s full of normal humans just vibing. for like 90% of the year they can’t leave because that’s Death Fog Season but it balances out because they can study the ghost migrations and also hear the whalesong-like calls of The Unspeakable Ones asking you to come outside for a game of checkers but thankfully the checkers set is kept locked up to slow down anyone that gets tempted
Idk who needs to hear this tonight, but I’ve been struggling with it a lot myself lately so I imagine there’s at least a couple folks who could use the sentiment:
It’s ok to not be able to create content as often or as quickly as you used to.
It’s ok for your WIP to stay a WIP.
It’s ok to bounce between projects and follow the one that has your interest at the moment.
It’s ok to spend your free time doing other hobbies you enjoy.
Life outside of fandom comes first, and your projects will turn out much better and you’ll think far fonder of them once you let yourself treat them like the hobby they’re supposed to be. <3
It’s ok to spend
your free time doing other
hobbies you enjoy.
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
They all wanted what he had; the power, the status, and the benefits those brought. But there was only room in his father’s tribe for one prince, and T'eirian was determined to hold on to his title.
Of course they were envious. Of course they would take any opportunity to stab him in the back if they thought they could do it and get away with it. But they also went along with whatever he suggested. Thus Eiri had gotten very, very good at pulling the right strings to use his brothers as a weapon, allowing him to do whatever he pleased while they did all the work for him.
Eiri hummed to himself as he leaned back in the cool shade at the edge of the oasis. The water was lovely on such a hot day. The sound of his unplanned melody line wove in along with the nearby noises of splashing and shouting, along with the occasional loud, desperate gasp for air and begging for mercy. T'rada would think, next time, before acting so foolishly.
Well… if there was a next time. Sometimes Eiri’s brothers did get a little carried away.
Oh well. It wasn’t Eiri’s problem. He was above them, after all.
Dance was a skill. It was a talent. But it was also so much more than that.
There were plenty of skilled dancers who looked to draw the eye - and the coin - of passersby in Ul'dah. But just because they were skilled, that didn’t mean they were good.
Over the years, Riski had realized that there was one universal truth about dance: no matter how uncoordinated, not matter how untrained, anyone could dance. As long as they felt it and wanted it, they could do it.
Some of the best dancers he’d seen had been the ones who had claimed to have two left feet. If they were happy and relaxed enough to just move their body, then they were dancing in the purest expression of the word. And that, to Riski, was the most beautiful.
It was good for Kala to get to meet another of her brothers, even if the other miqo'te was, to put it mildly, a little unsettling. Rather than getting in their way, Cam started to make his way out of the cluster of colorful tents and sawdust paths so he could continue gathering the herbs he’d come all the way to find. But just as he thought all he needed to do was go around a tent and he’d be back out into the La Noscean fields, there would be a fence or another, smaller tent, or some other barrier. He was starting to almost feel trapped.
“Beg your pardon, good ser,” a voice asked behind him, lightly accented in a way Cam didn’t recognize. “Looks t'me like you could use a hand. Y'mind if I offer my services as a guide?”
The voice, Cam saw when he turned, belonged to a pale viera. The man’s wavy purple locks were streaked with red, which matched his smiling eyes as well as the intricate pattern across his cheeks. Tattoos? Or paint? Cam didn’t know. “Oh, um… yes, please. I’m just trying to find an exit,” Cam admitted sheepishly. The man at least seemed friendly.
The viera’s smile brightened. “An exit, is it! Well, I know all about where to find that. Come along, come along. Name’s Oleander. Want me t'read your fortune along the way?” He beckoned Cam to follow, which he did with only a slight hesitation.
“That’s very kind of you,” Cam demurred. “But you don’t have to, I don’t want to bother you. Please.”
“Oh, it’s no trouble, no trouble.” As they walked, Oleander pulled out a well-worn deck of cards. “Shall I tell of your love life, then? That’s a popular one among the young folks.” His long ears swiveled to and fro, his step light and cheerful. “Even married, surely there’s always going to be concerned about a relationship beyond just the marriage bed–”
“That’s none of your business!” Cam exclaimed, blushing to the roots of his hair. “Please just point me in the right direction and I’ll be on my way.”
“Alright, alright,” Oleander said, soothing like he would to an anxious horse. “An exit it is. Right this way.”
Cam kept a wary eye on the viera until he was safely out of the marked boundaries and could head back out to where the herbs grew unmolested. At least the man was good to his word, and while he’d continued a stream of inane chatter, noneof it had been further attempts to discern Cam’s love life.
Shirh pulled off his reading glasses and tossed them onto the desk in front of him. Groaning in frustration, he ran his hands through his hair and leaned forward on his elbows so he could continue to stare down at the scattered papers. He’d never had to try to look for someone before, let alone multiple someones. Here he was trying to fix Kayah’s mistake and get everyone back together. He missed his tribe - not the one he’d grown up in, but the one that had been finally starting to feel like family.
Before Kayah had ruined it, of course.
There was nobody to blame but him. Shirh didn’t know the whole story because Kayahhadn’t told him, so he had nobody else to pin it on even if he wanted to. So he sat over his books and his papers and his attempts to find his scattered family, and fumed at his former nunh’s idiocy.
Kugane was special. Ul'dah had been interesting, but it couldn’t begin to hold a candle to the city where Daisuke had grown up.
There was something about the way the lights reflected in puddles as they formed in the late summer drizzle, how umbrellas were all starting to pop up around him like strange flowers, how not even the rain could stop people from going about their business, that was a specific sort of magic. Daisuke took a deep breath of the city and let it out with a smile. Though he had no umbrella of his own, he didn’t mind getting soaked. He knew he had a warm, dry place to return to.
Daisuke sauntered through the streets with his prize tucked under his jacket. He wasn’t in a hurry. Once he did reach the Yamagarasu offices, affectionately nicknamed The Aviary, he took a little extra time by going to change into dry clothes. Then he made his way to the Kumichou’s office, and let himself near-silently into it.
Oka was busy, but it was never easy to pull a fast one on him. He looked up as Daisuke entered, causing the hyur to smile bashfully. “Ah, too bad. I was going to surprise you.” That didn’t stop him from walking over to the desk and setting down what he’d gone out to get. Inside the miraculously dry bag were sticks of dango. “I thought with how hard you’ve been working, you deserved a treat.”
Dealing with Rhai'li could be difficult even at the best of times. Trying to convince him to try something out of his comfort zone was no the best of times.
“I promise you, it’s better than you think,” Toshiya tried.
Rhai'li looked up at him with big, sad eyes. “But it’s green.”
“Yes, but that doesn’t make it bad. It’s been blanched and seasoned and it really isn’t as bad as you keep saying it will be.”
“Or maybe he’ll keel over and die on the spot,” Kuroji said from the doorway to the kitchen and dining area.
Toshiya rubbed a hand over his eyes. “You’re not helping.”
“Well, either he doesn’t eat it and therefore doesn’t get dessert - in that case, more for me,” the big Xaela explained. “Or he does eat it and dies on the spot - in that case, more for me.” Kuroji smirked. “It’s a win-win.”
Toshiya full-on facepalmed while Rhai'li whined and dramatically fell backward onto the tatami. When one thought of there being a toddler in the house, they didn’t think it would be an easily-antagonized teenage miqo'te.
Rhai'li hummed along with the music being played. He’d heard Kaoru practicing enough times now to be able to recognize the tune, and even if he wasn’t so good at carrying the same tune himself, at least he had enthusiasm. He’d been told that a lot: he might not have much of one thing, but he made up for it with enthusiasm.
“Are there words to this song?” Rhai'li asked, walking over and crouching down to where Kaoru knelt behind his funny instrument. It didn’t look like any other instrument Rhai'li had ever seen, with what seemed like way too many strings and like it should be too big to be played by one person. And the long, floor-sweeping sleeves Kaoru favored! How did he manage it without getting those all tangled up?
Clearly, it must be easier to play than it seemed.
“Not that I am aware,” Kaoru replied softly, not looking up from his practice.
“We could add some,” Rhai'li offered, bouncing back up to his feet. “Some kind of tragic romance - two lovers, torn apart by fate, only to find themselves reunited when– whoa!” He’d been pacing the area, enraptured by his own silly ideas, but caught himselfon Kaoru’s carefully draped sleeves.
Rhai'li pinwheeled his arms like a demented piece of magitek, but there was nothing to save him from faceplanting directly into the bizarre-but-pretty instrument.
Dizzy and a little numb, Rhai'li sat up in a pile of splintered wood, snapped strings, and streaks of his own blood. He looked up at Kaoru, taking in his horrified and upset face, and smiled. “You’ve got really pretty eyes. You should make more eye contact with people, you know?”
