OK OK OK I AM SO SO HAPPY WITH HOW THIS CHAPTER TURNED OUT!!!!!!!!! Things are really picking up now! Also, I lowkey am realizing that I accidentally wrote this reader kind of like Alina’s plot so I’m trying to make sure that I branch off from that.
Note: This is a darkish chapter, but I don’t want to add the tags to the top and spoil the chapter, so they’ll be at the bottom of this post. Also, veryyyyyy plot heavy and angsty with a capital A.
Banner made by maysdigitalarts
After much pacing around your room, you had decided to meet him. You really didn’t want to, but he still was your general and according to him, you’d be a part of his guard. You’d have to be able to act civil with each other.
You’d come a long way these past few weeks, and you’d have to rely that the work you put into yourself would be enough for you to not fall into bad habits.
So around midnight, there you were. Standing in front of his war room door, hand poised to knock while the other clenched your cane tightly.
You took a deep breath, and before you could think, knocked on the massive door.
You heard a muffled “Enter.” From the other side, and you pulled the door open. As youclosed the door behind you, you saw Aleksander without his kefta, his long black shirt bunched at his elbows and he, as always, was wearing black trousers.
You said nothing, opting him to start the conversation and see why he had asked you here. He gave you a weary smile as he leaned off of his desk and stood up, before his face settled into a grim line.
“You’ve been avoiding me.” He crossed his arms over his chest.
“My training has picked up significantly.” You responded. “I’ve been fairly busy.”
His jaw ticked at that. “Ah yes, I suppose I should congratulate you.” He shuffled through the papers on his desk and you furrowed your brow.
“I’m sorry?” You tilted your head.
“Your friend who was just stationed in Kribirsk.” He smiled at your shocked expression. “Kozlov. I believe.” Andrei’s last name confirming what you had feared.
“What did you do?” You asked softly.
“What did I do?” His voice rose aggressively. “What did I do?” He asked incredulously. “What did you do?” He seethed. “You just stop showing up for no reason, and expect me to accept that?”
“I was focusing on my training!” You shouted. “Something you asked me to do!”
“Oh so you just forgot to even acknowledge me for two weeks?” He swiped at his desk, causing the paper there to fly off the edge of the table. “I’m sure your new friends kept you very busy.” His voice was venomous as he stormed over.
“Well maybe I just wanted to be around someone who actually cared about me.” You hissed in his face. “Maybe I cared about you enough to let chase your sun summoner. To try and let you be happy.”
He started to laugh at that. “So that’s what this is about.” He turned his back to you and walked away. “My sun summoner.” He paused and turned back to you.
“I’ve seen the way you look at her! The way you talk about her! Just now you referred to her as ‘your’ sun summoner. I truly am fine with it, Alina deserves happiness, but I just don’t want to be led on like this! I deserve to be happy too!”
“You’re right.” His voice grew eerily cold. “She is mine, but so are you.”
“I-“ You felt your voice physically catch in your throat as he lazily raised his hand. And your body seemed to lock in place.
He sighed, looking at you with mock sympathy, walking towards you with even strides. “You know, when I first felt all of your emotions, all of what the bond entailed, I despised it. Despised how human you were.” He spat the word human out and stopped in front of you. “So I tried to ignore it. Ignore you. After all, you were expendable, a pawn that I could twist to fit where I needed one. I sent you through the fold time and time again, testing your limits, never even giving you a second thought.”
You internally flinched as he gently ran the back of his hand down your cheek. You tried not to focus on your heart shattering at his callous admission.
“But that changed, a year ago, I believe. I felt something new. Something that even I couldn’t push down and ignore. And it was for him.” He growled, gripping your face tightly. “That brat who had been there, he practically never left your side. You practically had him on a leash.” Ruslan. Your mind supplied, thinking back to last year, when you were certain that he and you would be together. Remembering the feelings you had had for the man, you felt a tear roll out.
“What did you do?” You asked again, shakily as the ability to talk came back.
He gave you a cruel smile. “I made you forget. Forget how you felt, thought that’d be the end of it. But I hadn’t expected the bond to open.” He started mumbling to himself. He sighed. “Unfortunately the form of merzost I used was highly unpredictable. So the second I went into your head, the second I allowed myself in, everything changed.” He released you as if you had burned him. “All those feelings I had hated, all that human inside of you? Was just the surface.” He chuckled darkly.
“All of the things you felt, all of you came flooding in and I realized at that moment why I hated you.” He scoffed. “I hated that you could feel when I hadn’t been able to for centuries. I hated that your anger was so consuming and that your joy was so blissful.” He continued his monologue, not even noticing his slip.
“But most of all, I hated how he made you feel. How I hadn’t been able to feel like that for years. How I eventually, unknowingly had begun to feel again. About you.” He ranted, looking crazed.
“You’re the Black Heretic.” You breathed softly.
He gave you a proud smile. “You truly are as brilliant as I knew you’d be.”
“You created the fold.” Your mind started to connect all of the horrible things he’d done. “You created the volcra. You sent me through.” You screamed the last sentence and fought against whatever control he had over you, but to no avail. The tears that poured down your face now were not out of sadness, but anger.
“Not just you.” He said easily, still smiling. “Everyone in my way. Our way. Haven’t you wondered why your friend hadn’t been responding to your pathetic letters?” He ripped open his drawer and fished out a handful of paper. You felt as if ice had been poured over you.
“You son of a bitch.” You whispered.
“What? It’s not like she’d be able to read them.” He shrugged, walking over to the fireplace and throwing them in without a second thought. “I sent her through the fold the week we left. And just as I had expected, she didn’t make it halfway through. Even if she had, I’m sure that the Fjerdans would have gotten a hold of her eventually.”
You felt your soul burn in agony as the depth of his words hit you like a punch to the gut.
“No…” you whimpered, feeling less and less control over your limbs.
“I had hoped to tell you all this sometime in the far future, but I guess I have to improvise.” He flicked his fingers again and you robotically began to walk over to his room, numb with the loss of your friend.
If he was put off by your silence, he didn’t say anything about it, instead making you lay on the bed. His hands gently caressed your leg before undoing your shoes and brace.
He gave you a hungry look as he climbed in next to you and wrapped his arms around your chest. You felt a shiver run up your back as he pulled the covers over the two of you. “Get some sleep my love.” He said soothingly, running his fingers through your hair. “Tomorrow I won’t be nearly as patient as I have been.”
~~~~~~~~
Trigger warnings: mind control, angst, slight mention of non con if you squint, talk of death and murder, manipulation, possessive, jealous, and controlling darkling
Okay wow what is going on?!
So much confession from Kirigan I’m shook
Ngl I’m surprised reader figured out his true identity so quickly.
I’m pissed he got Anya killed that’s just so fucking cruel but I knew that he wouldn’t have sent her the letters :(
I never read the books but he can control people? Goddamn
Also babe, maybe put trigger warnings at the top :)
I’m really loving this storyyyy
So he can’t really control people in the books, but I just made that up as a form of merzost.
Thank you for the feedback, will move the warnings to the top. This was my first dark story and I wasn’t sure where exactly to put the tags at first. ❤️
I don’t even know what that means, merzost. I literally started watching Shadow and Bone because Ben Barnes was all tall dark and handsome in it
I think it’s cool as heck though, feeding his shadows into people so he can control them. What an amazing idea
You’re welcome! Ain’t no thang, I want your story to be top notch and you’re basically there, babe! I got your back ❤️
It’s basically when he uses his abilities to manipulate life and create things from his abilities instead of controlling what is already there. I felt like since we didn’t get much info on its limitations, that I could bend those a little.
And thank you so much!!!!! As I say in the authors notes, I always look forward to pointers and critiques about my writing. I do need to update the trigger warnings (or put those on) the master list I have for the series, I just keep forgetting to do so.
And I always love seeing your comments on my feed ❤️
OK OK OK I AM SO SO HAPPY WITH HOW THIS CHAPTER TURNED OUT!!!!!!!!! Things are really picking up now! Also, I lowkey am realizing that I accidentally wrote this reader kind of like Alina’s plot so I’m trying to make sure that I branch off from that.
Note: This is a darkish chapter, but I don’t want to add the tags to the top and spoil the chapter, so they’ll be at the bottom of this post. Also, veryyyyyy plot heavy and angsty with a capital A.
Banner made by maysdigitalarts
After much pacing around your room, you had decided to meet him. You really didn’t want to, but he still was your general and according to him, you’d be a part of his guard. You’d have to be able to act civil with each other.
You’d come a long way these past few weeks, and you’d have to rely that the work you put into yourself would be enough for you to not fall into bad habits.
So around midnight, there you were. Standing in front of his war room door, hand poised to knock while the other clenched your cane tightly.
You took a deep breath, and before you could think, knocked on the massive door.
You heard a muffled “Enter.” From the other side, and you pulled the door open. As youclosed the door behind you, you saw Aleksander without his kefta, his long black shirt bunched at his elbows and he, as always, was wearing black trousers.
You said nothing, opting him to start the conversation and see why he had asked you here. He gave you a weary smile as he leaned off of his desk and stood up, before his face settled into a grim line.
“You’ve been avoiding me.” He crossed his arms over his chest.
“My training has picked up significantly.” You responded. “I’ve been fairly busy.”
His jaw ticked at that. “Ah yes, I suppose I should congratulate you.” He shuffled through the papers on his desk and you furrowed your brow.
“I’m sorry?” You tilted your head.
“Your friend who was just stationed in Kribirsk.” He smiled at your shocked expression. “Kozlov. I believe.” Andrei’s last name confirming what you had feared.
“What did you do?” You asked softly.
“What did I do?” His voice rose aggressively. “What did I do?” He asked incredulously. “What did you do?” He seethed. “You just stop showing up for no reason, and expect me to accept that?”
“I was focusing on my training!” You shouted. “Something you asked me to do!”
“Oh so you just forgot to even acknowledge me for two weeks?” He swiped at his desk, causing the paper there to fly off the edge of the table. “I’m sure your new friends kept you very busy.” His voice was venomous as he stormed over.
“Well maybe I just wanted to be around someone who actually cared about me.” You hissed in his face. “Maybe I cared about you enough to let chase your sun summoner. To try and let you be happy.”
He started to laugh at that. “So that’s what this is about.” He turned his back to you and walked away. “My sun summoner.” He paused and turned back to you.
“I’ve seen the way you look at her! The way you talk about her! Just now you referred to her as ‘your’ sun summoner. I truly am fine with it, Alina deserves happiness, but I just don’t want to be led on like this! I deserve to be happy too!”
“You’re right.” His voice grew eerily cold. “She is mine, but so are you.”
“I-“ You felt your voice physically catch in your throat as he lazily raised his hand. And your body seemed to lock in place.
He sighed, looking at you with mock sympathy, walking towards you with even strides. “You know, when I first felt all of your emotions, all of what the bond entailed, I despised it. Despised how human you were.” He spat the word human out and stopped in front of you. “So I tried to ignore it. Ignore you. After all, you were expendable, a pawn that I could twist to fit where I needed one. I sent you through the fold time and time again, testing your limits, never even giving you a second thought.”
You internally flinched as he gently ran the back of his hand down your cheek. You tried not to focus on your heart shattering at his callous admission.
“But that changed, a year ago, I believe. I felt something new. Something that even I couldn’t push down and ignore. And it was for him.” He growled, gripping your face tightly. “That brat who had been there, he practically never left your side. You practically had him on a leash.” Ruslan. Your mind supplied, thinking back to last year, when you were certain that he and you would be together. Remembering the feelings you had had for the man, you felt a tear roll out.
“What did you do?” You asked again, shakily as the ability to talk came back.
He gave you a cruel smile. “I made you forget. Forget how you felt, thought that’d be the end of it. But I hadn’t expected the bond to open.” He started mumbling to himself. He sighed. “Unfortunately the form of merzost I used was highly unpredictable. So the second I went into your head, the second I allowed myself in, everything changed.” He released you as if you had burned him. “All those feelings I had hated, all that human inside of you? Was just the surface.” He chuckled darkly.
“All of the things you felt, all of you came flooding in and I realized at that moment why I hated you.” He scoffed. “I hated that you could feel when I hadn’t been able to for centuries. I hated that your anger was so consuming and that your joy was so blissful.” He continued his monologue, not even noticing his slip.
“But most of all, I hated how he made you feel. How I hadn’t been able to feel like that for years. How I eventually, unknowingly had begun to feel again. About you.” He ranted, looking crazed.
“You’re the Black Heretic.” You breathed softly.
He gave you a proud smile. “You truly are as brilliant as I knew you’d be.”
“You created the fold.” Your mind started to connect all of the horrible things he’d done. “You created the volcra. You sent me through.” You screamed the last sentence and fought against whatever control he had over you, but to no avail. The tears that poured down your face now were not out of sadness, but anger.
“Not just you.” He said easily, still smiling. “Everyone in my way. Our way. Haven’t you wondered why your friend hadn’t been responding to your pathetic letters?” He ripped open his drawer and fished out a handful of paper. You felt as if ice had been poured over you.
“You son of a bitch.” You whispered.
“What? It’s not like she’d be able to read them.” He shrugged, walking over to the fireplace and throwing them in without a second thought. “I sent her through the fold the week we left. And just as I had expected, she didn’t make it halfway through. Even if she had, I’m sure that the Fjerdans would have gotten a hold of her eventually.”
You felt your soul burn in agony as the depth of his words hit you like a punch to the gut.
“No…” you whimpered, feeling less and less control over your limbs.
“I had hoped to tell you all this sometime in the far future, but I guess I have to improvise.” He flicked his fingers again and you robotically began to walk over to his room, numb with the loss of your friend.
If he was put off by your silence, he didn’t say anything about it, instead making you lay on the bed. His hands gently caressed your leg before undoing your shoes and brace.
He gave you a hungry look as he climbed in next to you and wrapped his arms around your chest. You felt a shiver run up your back as he pulled the covers over the two of you. “Get some sleep my love.” He said soothingly, running his fingers through your hair. “Tomorrow I won’t be nearly as patient as I have been.”
~~~~~~~~
Trigger warnings: mind control, angst, slight mention of non con if you squint, talk of death and murder, manipulation, possessive, jealous, and controlling darkling
Okay wow what is going on?!
So much confession from Kirigan I’m shook
Ngl I’m surprised reader figured out his true identity so quickly.
I’m pissed he got Anya killed that’s just so fucking cruel but I knew that he wouldn’t have sent her the letters :(
I never read the books but he can control people? Goddamn
Also babe, maybe put trigger warnings at the top :)
I’m really loving this storyyyy
So he can’t really control people in the books, but I just made that up as a form of merzost.
Thank you for the feedback, will move the warnings to the top. This was my first dark story and I wasn’t sure where exactly to put the tags at first. ❤️
Another chapter? Lol after writing the last one, it completely inspired me to work more and more on this story. There’s mostly angst in this one, and Genya sees Y/n again!
Banner made by maysdigitalarts
The next week passed slowly, with your training slowly progressing, you’d become more and more agitated at yourself. You had finally mastered the ability to make others lose consciousness, but now you were learning trickier things.
Of course, training still wasn’t the only thing you did. Most days, you had dinner with Aleksander and you also made a point to visit Alina frequently. A few days after your talk with Alina in the garden, you had finally gotten to see Genya again. Alina had left in a hurry, promising to talk to you later when she’d come back. Thinking nothing of it, you let her go and headed up to the palace library. Today was one of your only days off and there were some books that you had been wanting to read.
Looking around the library with its towering wooden shelves, you decided to have a seat by the window overlooking the Little Palace courtyard. It was relatively early in the morning, and since the other grisha had training, the courtyard was nearly empty. You smiled as you watched a familiar black horse being led out and saw Aleksander. He patted Midnight with a content look and you thought back to the horse statue in his war room. He certainly loved his horses more than one would guess.
Having abandoned your book, you pulled out your pencils and sketchbook. Flipping through the pages, you caught sight of the Stag that Alina had drawn and paused on that page. Everytime you looked at it, you felt like you had seen it before. Noticing Midnight’s impatient whinney, you ignored that nagging feeling and started to sketch him from afar.
It was quick and rushed compared to your other drawings, but as you finished his hair, you saw another person approach him. You blinked as you recognized the blue and yellow kefta that Alina wore and put your pencil and the book down. You watched as he stepped away from Midnight towards her and gestured to the horses with a shy smile.
Something about the look he gave her made your heart sink. And you tried not to dwell on the feeling as the two of them mounted their horses and continued chatting as they rode off into the forest.
You probably shouldn’t feel this emotional about an innocent horse ride. It’s not like Aleks was yours. Besides that one night he kissed you, he only had you over for dinners. It was like he had changed somehow. Perhaps you were overthinking it. You’d have asked Anya all of these questions, but she hadn’t responded to your first letter. Or your second one. Perhaps you’d have to ask Aleksander about her later. It was just two grisha going for a ride together. That’s all. You repeated that mantra in your head and shrugged off the thought before returning the book. You no longer had the urge to read.
“Y/N?” A familiar voice called.
When you turned around you saw a flash of red hair and instantly forgot about Aleks and Alina. “Genya!” You shouted, flinging yourself into her arms. “Oh! I’ve missed you!”
She laughed at that and hugged you back tightly. “I missed you too! Now tell me everything. How’s Anya? I heard you started training again. Are you going to stay longer?” She asked rapidly, dragging you around excitedly. You had to hop and hobble to keep up with her excitement.
“As far as I know Anya is safe,” You said, leading her to your room. “And yes I have started training. The General wants me to be in his guard.”
You didn’t notice her narrowing her eyes at the close proximity of your room to Kirigan’s, but she definitely noted that it was closer than Alina’s. You, obliviously, kept talking excitedly. “I think I may be able to stay longer! And General Kirigan said that I won’t have to pass through the Fold again!”
“That’s wonderful!” Genya said, recalling from your letters how much the Fold had left a mark on you. Physically and metaphorically.
The two of you sat on your bed and Genya spoke up. “So what have you been up to while you’ve been here?”
With a big grin, you pulled your bad leg up onto the bed and rolled up your pant’s sleeve. Genya didn’t flinch at the scar as most did, but you had shown it to her before in your last stay at the Little Palace. You looked at the brace with a smile. “Guess who made it for me?” You teased as Genya’s face went red.
“You saw him?” She asked seriously, grabbing your hands. You nodded at her with a laugh. “I can see the appeal, he’s certainly grown from that boy we saw before the king.”
She blushed even harder and swatted your arm. “Shut up!” The two of you giggled like you used to when you were kids and Genya continued. “I’ve been seeing him around more.” She said softly. “I think he actually might know who I am.”
“He’d be blind not to notice you, Gen. You just need to talk to him.” You gave her a teasing look.
“Well what about you?” She asked, changing the subject. “Any men in your life?”
You blushed and she gasped loudly. “There is, isn’t there? You have to tell me everything!” She clasped your hands excitedly.
“Well, we haven’t exactly talked about what we are.” You said sadly. “And I don’t really know where I stand with him. He kissed me, amazingly I might add, once and then it’s like he’s pretending it never happened. I said I wanted to slow down, but not this slow.” You felt comfort in venting to your friend and voicing the thoughts that had been following you around for days.
“Who is it?” She asked, her happy smile changing into a concerned line. “Please tell me Ruslan manned up and told you how he felt.” She begged.
“No, Ruslan and I are just friends.” You shrugged, concerned about her tone.
“Then who is it?” Genya asked, desperately gripping your hands.
“I-,” You paused. “It’s General Kirigan.” You finished. Genya dropped your hands and you could have sworn that her face paled. She quickly got up from the bed and began to pace the room.
“He doesn’t feel the same way.” She said, her bluntness shocking you. “Y/n, you can’t be with him.”
“Why not?” You asked gently, putting your leg back on the floor and angrily standing up. “Because of this? Because I’m not like you?”
She flinched at that, but yelled back at you. “Because you’re not her. You’re not Alina Y/n. You don’t hear the way that he talks to her, they way he talks about her!”
“That- I-” You tried to reason away the horse ride, the more absent Aleks was during your dinners, but the facts kept stacking higher and higher against you.
“He gave her a black kefta today.” Genya said softly, touching your arm. “Please listen to me Y/n, he’s only going to hurt you.”
You felt tears run down your cheeks as the implication of Aleks gifting Alina a black kefta sank in. It would be the two of them, special and together while wearing the same color.
“I saw him.” You said softly. “I saw him go riding with Alina this morning, before I ran into you. I kept trying to tell myself that it’s nothing. He said-”
“He lies Y/n.” Genya walked towards you as if she were approaching a wounded animal. “Men like that think that they can have everything whenever they want it, and I don’t want you in the crossfire.” Her eyes started to water and you remember the tear stained letters you’d receive in Kribirsk about the Tsar. “I can’t let you end up like me.”
“He hasn’t stopped. Has he?” You choked out. Genya let a single tear fall, but wiped it away before it could reach the bottom of her cheek.
She cleared her throat nervously and I heard her voice crack. “No. He hasn’t.”
You walked over as quickly as your leg would allow and gave her a tight hug. “We can find a way to stop this Gen. We can get you transferred to the second army… or- or maybe tell General Kirigan. He could try and stop this.” You begged.
“What could he do?” Genya asked dejectedly. “Even he isn’t above the king.” You felt a sharp pain in your heart at the admission, and started to cry again for your friend.
“There has to be something we can do…” You continued muttering, squeezing her tighter. “There has to be…”
“Right now all I can do is survive.” Genya pulled away from you and stared deep into your eyes. “Please. Just trust me on this.” She begged.
You nodded slowly. “Ok.” You said softly. “I do. You know I’ll always trust you Gen.”
She let out a sigh of relief and hugged you tightly. You let her embrace you and recognized her warm vanilla perfume. At that moment, you knew that you really did believe Genya.
No more dinners, no more sketching him, no more thinking about him as you trained. No more Aleksander.
Yes Genya, protect your bestieeeee
Poor Genya, though :(
Poor reader. Dashed hopes and dreams (I can relate, RIP)
I’m baaaaaaaaaack! Here is the next chapter! I’ve also written the next one and am posting that as well to thank you all for being so patient! I also would like to thank everyone for all of the love this series has gotten! I started writing this right after the show came out, but am just now able to post it online and am so happy to be writing again!
Chapter warnings: mention of past non con and angst
Y/N’s POV
“Stay behind me and act natural.” You whispered to the man who had begrudgingly introduced himself as Kaz. “Ivan! Is everything ready?” You stepped in front of Kaz to distract Ivan.
“Everything is in place, Miss y/l/n. You’ve been ordered to keep to the walls tonight, more people means more threats.”
“On Kirigan, Alina, or the royals?” The two of you walked into the demonstration room and in the corner of your eye you saw Kaz meet up with a Suli girl, but you heard his heart race when he looked at her.
He let out a scoff at that. “Right on the nose, now get in position, Alina is about to enter.”
“You got it boss!” You said with your normal cheeky salute as you walked away.
As you casually made your way to the back wall of the grand room, you felt a strong hand wrap around your arm.
“You look lovely.” Aleksander said, pulling you fatter into the shadows. He had done well to not attract the attention of the rest of the guests. He always seemed to love his grand entrances.
You did look lovely. All Grisha had one pair of formal keftas, and yours was even more detailed and intricate than your regular uniform. The main difference was the white fur that lined the neck and bottom of the coat. When you had put it on and styled your hair earlier, you had marveled at the feel of the silk against your skin and how it fit in all the right places.
“I try.” You gave him a small smile. Whatever happened, he could not know that you planned to leave.
“I expect you to be on your best behavior tonight.” He brushed his hand against your cheek and looked at you with a content smile. “I may have a surprise for you.”
You raised your eyebrow at that with a smile. “You’re not going to tell me what it is aren’t you?” You quipped back with your hands on your hips and a smile.
“Come find me after the celebrations are over and I’ll show you.” After a quick glance around, he gave you a quick peck on the lips and strode away.
“I wasn’t aware he was your lover.” You heard Kaz grumble from behind the column.
“I’ll tell you all about it when you tell the Suli girl how you feel.” You snarked back, chuckling as Feydor shoved a pink macaroon into Ivan’s stoic face which slowly turned into a wide grin.
“I could still leave you here.” Kaz responded, standing next to you.
“Why help me in the first place? Something tells me you don’t pick up strays unless you get something out of it.” You hated these parties. All the rich stuffy ambassadors and nobles that always gave the grisha dirty looks and scoffed at them when Kirigan wasn’t around. At least the gossip was interesting.
“Someone paid for your passage.” He said simply as the Kaelish ambassador walked by.
“Who-“ You stopped as he splashed a glass of wine onto his uniform and feigned as if the man had bumped into him.
“Stick to the plan.” He whispered, before turning to Ivan and Feydor.
You rolled your eyes at his strange tactics, but only watched as he walked away.
You sighed as you scanned the party and watched as the crowd parted to allow Aleksander to slip back into the room. You didn’t know what to think about him, and how much of it was from you or him. Either way, you knew that he only had bad intentions towards yourself and Alina, and there was no telling what would happen if tonight fell apart.
You may have loved Aleksander at one point, but you loved being free more.
As you watched the chattering crowds, they grew suddenly silent and you let out a low gasp at what drew their attention away.
Alina stood in the entrance of the room looking like a saint come to life. In a black kefta. You pushed away the bitterness that rose in your gut at the color of the coat. Aleksander had to have been the one to put her in that. But even then, you felt your heart patter as she locked eyes with you across the room and gave you a small smile.
You blinked in surprise, but watched as Aleksander walked up to her and the two talked quietly. You couldn’t help but listen as you could make out one sentence. “You look lovely, by the way.”
With that one sentiment from Aleksander you knew. He must have told her everything he told you. Played you both for fools and seduced two idiotically girls at the same time.
As the inferni twins began their show, your eyes stayed glued to the two of them. He couldn’t fool you now.
Shaking your head, you ended up looking at Genya as she glanced a longing gaze over to David. It seemed like love was in the air tonight. But you huffed a laugh as he only looked back to her when she looked away. If only you could be like them. Have what they obviously had.
The crowd gave a long round of applause as Alina walked to the stage with Aleksander right behind her. The crowd immediately silenced as he turned to face them.
“Her name is Alina Starkov. And she will bring liberation to us all.” Aleksander spoke regally.
She would. To everyone but herself most likely.
With a dramatic clap, the darkness spread across the room and engulfed everyone in shadows.
You held your breath as Alina stepped forward and light appeared from her hands.
“Come on Starkov.” You whispered to yourself.
As the light solidified into a small ball, you released the breath you had held and smiled as she split it into two.
With a slow wave of her hands, the glass flew across the room and the whole surface was engulfed in a beautiful blue light. “Wow.” You breathed quietly. As your neck craned to take it all in.
Aleksander looked around the room, taking in everyone’s expressions, as you stared straight at Alina. And she looked back at you. She smiled confidently as her arms gracefully moved towards her chest and your eyes locked with hers.
And with one more wave of her hands, the balls split into large lights, illuminating the room and chasing off the darkness that had engulfed it.
You smiled softly at her as the crowd began to kneel and whisper the words “Sankta Alina.”
She gave you one more smile before turning her head to look at Aleksander who watched her intently.
With everyone distracted, now was your only chance to get ready. You feel sad as you take in the wide room for what would probably be your last time.
Kaz would grab Alina, while you had to find a Zenimi man dressed in a footman’s uniform.
Welcome back! This part was beautifully written and I can’t wait for the next ones ❤️
Thank you!!!!! I’m so happy to be able to write again and really missed this series!
This one is a bit long, but I don’t think there are any chapter warnings besides mention of past non con and angst.
And the interrogation scene is next. I’m very excited for that one
You had nearly made it to the stables, when you heard a gunshot echo in the far corridors of the Little Palace. ‘Please tell me that was part of your plan Kaz.’ You thought desperately to yourself as you shoved your few belongings you had stashed in your old room into a weathered pack.
As much as you had loved your fete dress, it was left behind with all of your other uniforms. You finished hastily buttoning your shirt before grabbing your old shoes from the front. As you looked at yourself in the mirror, you didn’t see a grisha, just another commoner and that’s what you wanted.
You swallowed slightly as you carefully began to undo your leg brace. It had now become as much of a part of you as your injury had, but David himself had said that the metal he had used was rare. And that meant easily tracked.
As you slid the metal off of you, you cradled it in your arms and smiled at it. Perhaps it was stupid to feel so attached to something material, but this thing had given you a bit of your past back. It had stopped the pain from spreading up your thigh and had allowed you to be more mobile.
But you couldn’t dwell on that now, so you shoved the brace away and grabbed a nearby roll of bandages to keep yourself more sturdy.
After skillfully completing your wrap, you pulled up a pair of brown trousers and grabbed an old ratted coat that Ruslan had lent you before you left. It was time.
Slowly opening the door, you poked your head out and made your way to the place Kaz had shown you where the Zemini would be.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aleksander’s POV
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“What is it?” Aleks asked breathlessly as he opened his chamber doors. The last kiss he had shared with Alina still on his mind.
“Marie and Genya were attacked in the fitting room.” Ivan said seriously. “Alina was the target.”
Aleksander stiffened at that. He had known that people were after his sun summoner, but the thought that they were able to get into the Little palace left him uneasy.
“We have a suspect in custody.”
“Wait here.” Any annoyance at the interruption was gone. He had to make sure that there was no longer any threat. He finally had the stag within his grasp, and would be damned if Alina was killed before he could complete his plan.
Quickly shutting the door he walked to Alina and gave her his best smile.
“Is something wrong?” Her eyes were wide as she looked at him with concern.
“It’s nothing.” He brushed off easily. “I’ll leave my guards outside until I return.” He ran his hands down her small shoulders and looked deep into her eyes. He was so close. Too close for anyone to mess up what he had planned for Y/n and Alina.
“I’ll be waiting.” She said breathlessly as he caressed her cheek.
With a small nod he walked away but froze Galway to the door in favor of turning back to sneak one last kiss. She tasted like strawberries, and he couldn’t help but think of how you tasted like mint when he kissed you. As his lips pressed against Alina’s again, he forced himself to pull away. He could kiss her later, when the threat was dealt with and Ravka was theirs to rule, but he couldn’t help but feel the same pull of attraction he had felt towards Y/n. The one that made him want to stay in bed with her all day and never stop kissing her.
As he walked out of the room, he nodded to Ivan. “Take me to him.” He said sternly. “Any clue how he got in?”
“He hasn’t talked yet.” Ivan said as the two quickly made their way through the maze of halls.
“He will.” Aleksander said nonchalantly. “Bring Volkov as well. Two people sneaking into the Little Palace tonight is not a coincidence we can afford.”
~~~~~~~~
Y/n’s POV
~~~~~~~~
You shivered as you walked through the stables and leaned heavily on your cane. Your leg was much weaker now without your brace, and with each step you felt a familiar pain shoot up your thigh.
Leaving the musty rooms, you hobbled slowly towards the only carriage set up to leave.
“Can I help you, miss?” A deep voice asked from behind you. The Zemini was there when you turned around just as Kaz said he would be.
“Looks like you’re my ride, Kaz sent me.” You whispered softly.
The man’s eyes widened at the name and he whipped his head around to see if anyone had heard. “You’re y/l/n aren’t you?” He asked, putting his hands on his hips. “Saints Kaz found you fast.”
“More like I found him.” You responded with a shrug. “He had briefly mentioned that my passage out of here was bought. What does that mean?”
The man gave an exaggerated shrug. “Dunno. Kaz never tells me anything. Be glad he told me to expect you otherwise you’d have a bullet in your brain.”
“I appreciate not getting shot.” You said with an easy smile. “I’m Y/n.” You held out your hand.
“Jesper Fahey.” He shook your hand excitedly with a large grin. “What order are you?”
“Both a healer and heartrender.” You replied with a smile. “I’m a bit of a… special case.”
“Interesting.” He said thoughtfully. “Do you like it? Being grisha?”
You sighed and braced yourself against a large tree. “I love it. Healing others and doing something bigger than myself? I may not have had a choice, but it was perfect. Even after my accident.” You gestured to your knee. “I got it in the fold.” You explained before he could ask. “No one was able to fix it, but I still did my job, and did it well too.”
“So, what happened?” He asked seriously. “Why leave if it was so great?”
“Men are the same everywhere. Grisha or non grisha alike.” You thought back to the king and Aleksander. “Well men in power at least. You seem nice.”
He laughed at that. “Tell me about it. In Ketterdam we have entire houses that take advantage of young women. Have to stop myself everyday from going in there and shooting the bastards responsible for it.”
You nodded as you took in his tense expression. “I don’t think I’d have that much control.” You said honestly. “But it would be a bit obvious if a bunch of mobsters all fell down dead at the same time.”
He laughed again at that. “If you have any ideas on how to get away with it let me-“ Jesper froze and flattened the two of you against the tree. “You can’t be serious.” He whispered.
“What?” You hissed trying to look.
He released you and motioned for you to keep quiet.
Your eyes widened as you spotted Alina in plain brown clothes creeping towards your carriage.
The two of you stayed frozen as she pushed herself into the chest in the back.
Jesper let out a breathless laugh and you blinked at the scene. “Do- do all your heists go off like that?”
“Saints no. Usually there’s a part where we all face certain doom and have to cut our losses before coming out on top.” He started to laugh hysterically as he held out his hand for you.
You took it as you shook your head and he helped lead you towards the carriage. You’d be fine once you got used to not having your brace, but for now you weren’t used to being without it.
“What happened? You okay?” He asked, as Kaz and the Suli girl walked over.
The two looked disheveled and you swore you could smell the faint scent of smoke on their clothes.
“She’s real, Jesper. She made the light sing.” The girl whispered reverently.
“We lost her.” Kaz said gruffly, causing you and Jesper to look at each other with a smile.
“Did we?” He asked as you climbed into the carriage and winced at another sharp pain.
“We don’t know where she is.” The girl gave you a curt nod before climbing next to you.
“Don’t we?” You and Jesper laughed as the two men sat themselves on the seat. “Just ask.”
“Jesper-“
“Just ask.”
He gripped the reins tightly as Kaz glared at him.
“Fine. Do we have a fix on where the target is?”
With a small snort, Jesper flicked the reins and you were off.
I’m baaaaaaaaaack! Here is the next chapter! I’ve also written the next one and am posting that as well to thank you all for being so patient! I also would like to thank everyone for all of the love this series has gotten! I started writing this right after the show came out, but am just now able to post it online and am so happy to be writing again!
Chapter warnings: mention of past non con and angst
Y/N’s POV
“Stay behind me and act natural.” You whispered to the man who had begrudgingly introduced himself as Kaz. “Ivan! Is everything ready?” You stepped in front of Kaz to distract Ivan.
“Everything is in place, Miss y/l/n. You’ve been ordered to keep to the walls tonight, more people means more threats.”
“On Kirigan, Alina, or the royals?” The two of you walked into the demonstration room and in the corner of your eye you saw Kaz meet up with a Suli girl, but you heard his heart race when he looked at her.
He let out a scoff at that. “Right on the nose, now get in position, Alina is about to enter.”
“You got it boss!” You said with your normal cheeky salute as you walked away.
As you casually made your way to the back wall of the grand room, you felt a strong hand wrap around your arm.
“You look lovely.” Aleksander said, pulling you fatter into the shadows. He had done well to not attract the attention of the rest of the guests. He always seemed to love his grand entrances.
You did look lovely. All Grisha had one pair of formal keftas, and yours was even more detailed and intricate than your regular uniform. The main difference was the white fur that lined the neck and bottom of the coat. When you had put it on and styled your hair earlier, you had marveled at the feel of the silk against your skin and how it fit in all the right places.
“I try.” You gave him a small smile. Whatever happened, he could not know that you planned to leave.
“I expect you to be on your best behavior tonight.” He brushed his hand against your cheek and looked at you with a content smile. “I may have a surprise for you.”
You raised your eyebrow at that with a smile. “You’re not going to tell me what it is aren’t you?” You quipped back with your hands on your hips and a smile.
“Come find me after the celebrations are over and I’ll show you.” After a quick glance around, he gave you a quick peck on the lips and strode away.
“I wasn’t aware he was your lover.” You heard Kaz grumble from behind the column.
“I’ll tell you all about it when you tell the Suli girl how you feel.” You snarked back, chuckling as Feydor shoved a pink macaroon into Ivan’s stoic face which slowly turned into a wide grin.
“I could still leave you here.” Kaz responded, standing next to you.
“Why help me in the first place? Something tells me you don’t pick up strays unless you get something out of it.” You hated these parties. All the rich stuffy ambassadors and nobles that always gave the grisha dirty looks and scoffed at them when Kirigan wasn’t around. At least the gossip was interesting.
“Someone paid for your passage.” He said simply as the Kaelish ambassador walked by.
“Who-“ You stopped as he splashed a glass of wine onto his uniform and feigned as if the man had bumped into him.
“Stick to the plan.” He whispered, before turning to Ivan and Feydor.
You rolled your eyes at his strange tactics, but only watched as he walked away.
You sighed as you scanned the party and watched as the crowd parted to allow Aleksander to slip back into the room. You didn’t know what to think about him, and how much of it was from you or him. Either way, you knew that he only had bad intentions towards yourself and Alina, and there was no telling what would happen if tonight fell apart.
You may have loved Aleksander at one point, but you loved being free more.
As you watched the chattering crowds, they grew suddenly silent and you let out a low gasp at what drew their attention away.
Alina stood in the entrance of the room looking like a saint come to life. In a black kefta. You pushed away the bitterness that rose in your gut at the color of the coat. Aleksander had to have been the one to put her in that. But even then, you felt your heart patter as she locked eyes with you across the room and gave you a small smile.
You blinked in surprise, but watched as Aleksander walked up to her and the two talked quietly. You couldn’t help but listen as you could make out one sentence. “You look lovely, by the way.”
With that one sentiment from Aleksander you knew. He must have told her everything he told you. Played you both for fools and seduced two idiotically girls at the same time.
As the inferni twins began their show, your eyes stayed glued to the two of them. He couldn’t fool you now.
Shaking your head, you ended up looking at Genya as she glanced a longing gaze over to David. It seemed like love was in the air tonight. But you huffed a laugh as he only looked back to her when she looked away. If only you could be like them. Have what they obviously had.
The crowd gave a long round of applause as Alina walked to the stage with Aleksander right behind her. The crowd immediately silenced as he turned to face them.
“Her name is Alina Starkov. And she will bring liberation to us all.” Aleksander spoke regally.
She would. To everyone but herself most likely.
With a dramatic clap, the darkness spread across the room and engulfed everyone in shadows.
You held your breath as Alina stepped forward and light appeared from her hands.
“Come on Starkov.” You whispered to yourself.
As the light solidified into a small ball, you released the breath you had held and smiled as she split it into two.
With a slow wave of her hands, the glass flew across the room and the whole surface was engulfed in a beautiful blue light. “Wow.” You breathed quietly. As your neck craned to take it all in.
Aleksander looked around the room, taking in everyone’s expressions, as you stared straight at Alina. And she looked back at you. She smiled confidently as her arms gracefully moved towards her chest and your eyes locked with hers.
And with one more wave of her hands, the balls split into large lights, illuminating the room and chasing off the darkness that had engulfed it.
You smiled softly at her as the crowd began to kneel and whisper the words “Sankta Alina.”
She gave you one more smile before turning her head to look at Aleksander who watched her intently.
With everyone distracted, now was your only chance to get ready. You feel sad as you take in the wide room for what would probably be your last time.
Kaz would grab Alina, while you had to find a Zenimi man dressed in a footman’s uniform.
Hey guys! So I’ve decided to start a tag list so if you are interested in being on it, please comment below or message me! I hope to restart my two big series again, but they take time since I have to sit down and make sure that they line up with the plot of the show. But I am definitely getting back into the Shadows and Scars mindset so that would probably be written first. As always if you have any requests you can send them in! I also started writing for Steven Grant, Marc Spector, Jake Lockley, and Steve Kemp. (Note: I will try to write DID as well as I can for the moon knight boys, but if you have any tips please send them in!) Now that I finished up my classes, updates should be more regular.
