I’m choosing me.

I’m not choosing to gain weight. I’m choosing to be me.

because I am not …

* saying no to plans that might involve food.

* body checking after every meal to know how much self-loathing to carry with me that day.

*rigid. numb. foggy.

*stuck in my head. distant. never present. &never truly joining in.

because I am …

* sitting at a bar, alone, having margs just because //no special occasion needed to treat myself//.

* splitting an unplanned slice of cake with a best friend.

* spontaneous. clear-minded. emotional (for the good &for the bad).

* living life. experiencing the world around me. joining in &making memories with the ones I love oh so much.

gains.

positives to weight gain

*you wear clothes, no more clothes wearing you.
* &you get to buy new clothes
*moving without fear of breaking
*discovering your body does more than hurt &be cold.
*stepping out of the fog &being present.
*social eating is actually social (not a stressful clusterfuck)
*finding ways to define yourself other than the skinny one.
*feeling. having enough energy to experience&show emotion.
*freeing up brain space to think about so many other //better// things.
*having an all natural glow up.