#bodypositive
By Vrinda Trivedi
Dear body,
I love, love, love you. I love you like I love my family- unconditionally, despite the many times I feel frustrated and angry. Ever since I was very little, I’ve had a sense of clarity about what I prioritized in my life. And my family always topped that list. It wasn’t until very recently that you, Body, climbed your way up to that list, just under “Mummy, Papa, and Vyoma.” For years, I neglected you. Skipping meals in favor of liquified sludge, depriving you of actual sustenance and love. But we’ve come far, haven’t we? Nearly 20 years, we’ve spent together, you and I. Sometimes at odds, and sometimes as harmoniously as chips and guac. And although this admiration has always been unspoken, today, I want to take the time to declare my appreciation for you. So, in no particular order, here is an abridged list of why I love you:
Nose, you’ve been the trouble child. A bit oversized and pointy, I’ve never been your biggest fan. But despite my distaste, you let me adorn you with a golden hoop so I could feel connected to my motherland and the centuries of Indian women who also share my delight in catching a glimpse of gold in every reflective surface. For hosting that sense of community, I thank you.
Eyes, the windows to my soul. Dark and angsty as ever, you humor me to no end. Even when I pretend like everything’s okay and I’m not actually pissed off, you perpetually give away my true emotions. You teach me that my feelings are valid, and you allow me to display my fury, sadness, and joy, without restraint.
Feet. I used to be pretty apathetic about you, feet, never fully understanding how completely dependent I am on you. The constant walking (often in horrendously painful shoes, beauty is pain, yada yada) in New York has made me hyper aware of how resilient my feet are when it comes to healing quickly so I can continue on with life. The speed at which my poor feet have healed themselves repeatedly can only be described as truly astonishing, even magical
Arm hair, I love you now, but we both know that I used to hide you under swaths of cloth because I was ashamed of you and your abundance of feathery, black fuzz. When I was 17, all the aunties used to whisper and occasionally confront me about why I hadn’t gotten rid of you to reveal my bony, bronzed arms. Their words were so hypnotic and I was amazed at how all the older girls looked almost seductive, baring their glistening, bare arms in the summer, so I did what they said. I took a Venus Embrace to you, and days later realized that the “Embrace” wasn’t comforting at all. Arm hair stubble is the literal worst. And so to keep the pointy black pigment from sprouting up, I became obsessed with shaving my arms, and I hated it. Finally, winter, with its safe, covered sleeves, came around and I dealt with the constant itchy skin and let you grow back into silky strands of darkness. My hair is what embraces me now, keeping my arms happy and protected. When the aunties stare in confusion at my dark arms, I smile and wave, letting my arm hair flutter through the breeze.
My back makes me insecure. I have never been completely content with the way that you look and the way that you feel. Covered in dark brown freckles, sun spots and an assortment of little black moles, I cringe when you’re exposed to the world behind me. Radical self love tells me that I need to accept you as a part of me, before I can become fully happy with myself. It’s frustrating, but I’ve been taking steps to come to terms with the fact that you’re not perfect, and that’s okay because I’m not perfect either. When I was considering getting a tattoo, I was very apprehensive about the idea of a back or shoulder tattoo. I didn’t want to have to see you more than I already had to. But then I realized that I needed to force myself to look at you, to appreciate you, so I ended up getting a Sanskrit mantra, “या देवी सर्वभुतेषु शक्तिरूपेण संस्थिता ।” (“Yaa Devii Sarva-Bhutessu Shakti-Ruupenna Samsthitaa”, which translates to “To that Devi Who in All Beings is Abiding in the Form of Power”) on my upper back.
To me, the mantra deconstructs power dynamics in a way that restores and affirms the idea that the female form is the embodiment of pure power.) It reminds me that my physical form embodies strength. I forget far too often that the human body is self-preserving in a variety of ways, and that I contain all that I need. Our Eurocentric media and society continually tell me that I am not conventionally pretty, with a big nose and hairy brown skin. But over time, I’ve slowly come to understand that beauty is not supposed to be exclusive. My definition of beauty is one where all bodies, able or not, white or not, binary or not, are accepted and loved by the people that inhabit them. My beautiful body, I love you.
Lots of love (even despite the occasional hate),
Me
Vrinda Trivedi is a senior Women’s, Gender, and Sexuality Studies and Political Science double major at the College of Wooster. She interned with Sakhi for South Asian Women this summer.
As a member of the waist training community, this speaks serious volumes.
I’ve had to deal with so much negativity lately on other people’s transformation posts and it started to turn me away from ever posting there again about myself.
However this right here, has given me the courage to continue on for the sake of the silent lovers.
My elementary school had a pool which meant we had swim class regularly. I LOVED to swim and felt powerful in the water. But to reach that enjoyment first required me to brave the anxiety of walking out to the pool in my swimsuit in front of my peers to the bleachers where we would wait for class to start. I would hurry out, arms folded trailing behind somebody hoping I could hide behind them. I was a chubby kid and felt incredibly insecure and exposed in my suit. I couldn’t wait until we could jump in, where my body would dissolve and all you would visibly see of me was my head popping out above water.
Summer was no different. I loved swimming and going to the beach. It was and still is one of my favorite things to do. But that meant my body being exposed for all of its, for what I saw as, unloveable imperfections. I was often one of the first in the water, and it wasn’t solely because I loved to swim.
I’ve gone through so much transformation since then that now I feel at home in a bikini. The idea of somebody judging me in one has no power over me. As I’ve developed the understanding of being worthy of love as I look now, it has muted the volume of insecurity inside of me. Everybody perceives beauty differently. I am allowed to exist and be seen and heard in this body as much as any other kind of body. I grant this freedom to you. It’s not our bodies stopping us from feeling lovable, it’s the mindset.
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Thighs. Mine are thick. They have cellulite. They have dimples. They jiggle when I move around and especially when I’m dancing. They can lead to holes on the inner sides of my pants from the consistent chub rub that occurs. These thighs have held me up when I’ve felt the weakest. They’ve allowed me to stand firm in my life. They’ve shown up everyday for me regardless of my mindset toward them. They’ve loved me. Regardless of where I may want to be on my body journey, or where you may want to be on your body journey, there’s room for love right now. We are worthy here and now to speak our truth. We are worthy here and now to claim our abundance. We are worthy here and now to be seen as we are today. We do not need to wait until our physical appearance is more “acceptable” to live our lives the way we desire. Because despite what I believed as a child growing up, I do not need my body to look a certain way to deserve love, confidence, or success. Neither do you. Happy Monday ❤️ #bodylovebritt #plussize #plussizestyle #plussizefashion #bodypositive #bodypositivity #bodyconfidence #bodylove #bodyfreedom #selflove #selfworth #unconditionallove #plussizemodel #lgbtq #lgbt #trusttheprocess #beyourself #authenticity #beauthentic #loveyourself #loveyourselffirst #ascension #enlightenment #spirituality #awakening #plussizeblogger #fashionblogger #ootd #selfconfidence #newbeginnings
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I caught a song lyric the other day. It sang, “Control yourself. Take only what you need from it.” This spoke to my heart, as it brought some clarity and hope to me. I can deal with the past by selecting the gems of wisdom I’ve learned that have aided in my growth, and I can release the rest. I can acknowledge that I went through a tremendous amount of pain and I had to let go of almost everything and everybody I had grown connected. This was so I could rebuild on a foundation of truth and aligned values to who I now am. In fact, after attending a service this weekend I was shown that building relationships off shared interests or shared pain is actually toxic. Relationships that grow us are those built off shared values. As we grow and shift into higher versions of ourselves, those values may change. Which may mean altering our relationships and lives completely to suit where we are now. So I ask you, what are your values in life? For me, my top value is following my Truth/Unconditional Love/God/Consciousness - whatever you may call it. That is what unlocks my chains and allows me to express myself with absolute freedom, knowing I am worthy and deserving to be seen just as I am. ❤️✨ #bodylovebritt #unconditionallove #higherconscious #selflove #selfworth #bodylove #bodyacceptance #bodyconfidence #bodypositivity #bodypositive #plussize #plussizestyle #plussizefashion #plussizemodel #plussizeblogger #travelblogger #fashionblogger #god #twinflames #soulmates #spirituality #ascension #trusttheprocess #plur #plurlife #raver #lgbtq #lgbt #one #honesty
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Today at Pride 2019 ️ I’m grateful to have the freedom to express myself in all of the colors that come forward. I am continuing to learn how to strive for the sun and leave behind the shadow. I’ll keep moving forward and I pray the same for you, too.
Thank you for the photo, @bello_dentro_e_fuori
Ps. I have a new style Sunday YouTube video out today, have you seen it? link in my bio! #bodylovebritt #lgbt #lgbtq #pride #bisexual #sexuality #sensuality #bodypositive #bodypositivity #plussizefashion #plussize #plussizestyle #plussizemodel #plussizeblogger #spirituality #unicorn #ravegirls #plur #plurlife #fashionblogger #travelblogger #happiness #joy #unconditionallove #trusttheprocess #bodyconfidence #bodylove #selflove #selfworth #selfrespect
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The sun has my back ☀️It radiates me #BodyLoveBritt #selflove #selfworth #selfgrowth #unconditionallove #plur #plurlife #bodylove #bodyconfidence #bodypositive #bodypositivity #body #plussize #plussizefashion #plussizeblogger #plussizestyle #psootd #ootd #transformation #spirituality #awakening #trusttheprocess #fashionblogger #travelblogger #strength #bravery #courage #authentic #lgbt #lgbtq (at Tucson, Arizona)
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Let’s take flight
#BodyLoveBritt #selflove #selfworth #selfgrowth #unconditionallove #plur #plurlife #bodylove #bodyconfidence #bodypositive #bodypositivity #body #plussize #plussizefashion #plussizeblogger #plussizestyle #psootd #ootd #transformation #spirituality #awakening #trusttheprocess #fashionblogger #travelblogger #strength #bravery #courage #authentic #lgbt #lgbtq (at Planet Earth)
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Facing toward my sun so it can illuminate my Being ☀️ I’m a sunflower-Soul after all
#bodylovebritt #gratitude #plussize #plussizefashion #plussizemodel #bodypositive #bodypositivity #torrid #selfempowerment #selflove #selfworth #unconditionallove #arizona #plussizeblogger #fashionblogger #ootd #psootd #bodylove #bodyconfidence #plur #plurlife #plurvibes #lgbt #lgbtq #spirituality #twinflames #intuition #sunshine #desert #freedom (at Tucson, Arizona)
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Taking my life back one makeup look at a time
#bodylovebritt #motd #makeup #plussize #plussizefashion #plussizemodel #plussizeblogger #fashionblogger #bodypositive #bodypositivity #spirituality #twinflames #unconditionallove #psootd #ootd #throatchakra #bodyconfidence #bodylove #selflove #selfworth #selfcare #selfie #arizona #tucson #plur #raver #glitter #ravegirls #freedom #happiness (at Tucson, Arizona)
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Throwback Thursday to June waterfalls in NY. Even though I love this photo and my outfit in it I never posted because the waterfall is barely shown. I realized today that perhaps the message stands with the fence creating a boundary between me and the powerful cliff’s edge. This fence may look menacing however it is there to produce safety. I can still fully enjoy the power of the waterfall while respecting its need of space to flow naturally and abundantly in its own beautiful way. ✨#bodylovebritt #waterfalls #waterfall #newyork #ny #cohoesfalls #roadtrip #roadtripusa #summer #plussize #plussizefashion #psootd #ootd #plussizestyle #plusmodelmag #plussizeblogger #bodypositive #bodypositivity #plur #raver #travelblogger #fashionblogger #spirituality #ascension #twinflames #unconditionallove #selflove #bodyconfidence #bodyacceptance #flow (at Cohoes Falls)
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This pose isn’t even remotely discreet as to who took the photo ♀️ #bodylovebritt #plussize #plussizefashion #plussizestyle #plussizemodel #plusmodelmag #torrid #plur #plussizeblogger #travelblogger #fashionblogger #bodypositive #bodypositivity #bodylove #bodyconfidence #bodyacceptance #selflove #selfworth #selfacceptance #selfie #tucson #arizona #ootd #ootdfashion #psootd #unconditionallove #lgbtq #spirituality #sexuality #sensuality (at Arizona)
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Stepping into the adult modeling / content realm brought clarity and comfort to my body insecurities. I found how attraction truly differs person to person and I didn’t have to alter my body to be found sexy. I started internalizing this and found a domino-effect of body confidence start rippling through my life. This led to greater and deeper changes including self-realization and spiritual awakening. All because I was brave enough to step outside-the-box and pursue a community and mindset where I was allowed to look how I did AND feel that abundant worth. #bodylovebritt
#plussize #plussizestyle #plussizefashion #plussizemodel #plussizeblogger #bodypositive #bodypositivity #bodyconfidence #bodylove #bodyacceptance #sensuality #sexuality #lgbt #lgbtq #modeling #model #lingerie #bbw #plusmodelmag #yellownails #highheels #heels #fashionblogger #travelblogger #ascension #spirituality #sexy #selflove #selfcare (at Arizona)
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Access to my adult modeling content: www.patreon.com/bodylovebritt | ✨ I’ve been in the adult modeling business since 2009. That is 10 years of pushing the boundaries of my comfort zone -questioning the amount of acceptance I was willing to give myself. When I first started modeling, I kept it a secret from my family and childhood friends whom I didn’t feel would approve of my decision. Due to that, I limited my body freedom, feeling ashamed that I was able to profit off of the body liberation I deserved, considering the amount of body-hate and insecurity I had growing up. I took a two year break from this work from 2017-2019 as I began to question my worth. I moved back to Maine and surrounded myself with the energies that I didn’t feel empowered or safe to fully be myself. I severely limited my access to the abundance I deserved because I returned to living for other people’s approvals instead of my own. Now that I’ve reclaimed my power and know I deserve this justice that my body liberation brings, I am seeing my life flip upside down. The love that the Universe has so desperately wanted to give me is finally raining down on me because I know that regardless of my decisions in life, I am worthy and unconditionally loved. I extend this freedom to you to express your body in *any* way you desire. #bodylovebritt
#bodyacceptance
#bodyconfidence
#sensuality
#sexuality
#plussize
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#bodypositive
#bodypositivity
#selflove
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#independent
#independentwoman
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#spirituality
#twinflames
#soulmates
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#travelblogger (at Los Angeles, California)
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Looking right at you .
#newbeginnings #movingon #movingforward #lookingup #bodylovebritt #selflove #unconditionallove #peace #freedom #liberty #rainbow #rainbows #tucson #arizona #plussize #plussizefashion #bodypositive #bodypositivity #bodyconfidence #spirituality #ascension #travelblogger #love #twinflames #soulmates #thejourney #yinyang #divinefeminine #divinemasculine #balance (at Tucson, Arizona)
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2 years ago today, I posted my first ever photo on Instagram. My first thoughts were, who on earth is going to want to look at photos of an overweight, middle aged woman?! Fast forward to now, and so far, more than 71 thousand of you, apparently! It’s been a bumpy ride at times and I’ve seen many changes along the way. Most importantly, my reason for creating this page is to show society that you can be a mature, plus size lady and still be unapologetically sexy and feel good about yourself! There has been a huge movement in the past few years regarding body positivity and larger ladies. This is great, but what I really would like to see is more of women supporting each other, no matter what their size, age or shape. Far too often women are pitched against each other. There’s room for all of us. All bodies are relevant. All women are ‘real women’ whether you’re a SSBBW or a tiny waif or something in between. We should support each other, regardless! I would like to say a massive thank you to all who have supported me so far, you are amazing! Also big thanks to the shoutout pages who have helped me immensely but mostly to @vintage11011964 who is my rock and has encouraged me to keep going, through thick and thin ❤️ #lovemyfollowers #thankstomyfollowers #thankful #blessed #thanksforthelove #thanksforthesupport #2yearanniversary #secondyearanniversary #bodypositive #sexpositive #gigi_satin #feelingthelove #celebrating2years @mannywood4gigi @drakeculia @astrallover4u
