#dnd worldbuilding
Today on “things as a DM I didn’t think I’d say”
Dnd update: my character learnt what taxes are shortly followed by tax evasion
What I love about running this blog is when y’all put stuff abt ur games in the tags. Like I have no context for what’s happening but it always makes me laugh. Sat in my room like:
“Oh shit someone has commit war crimes?”
“Damn Leonelle really had it coming to em”
“This DM is so evil I love that for them”
Here to bless you with another quote from a dnd session:
Aarakocra Warlock, to another character: don’t worry, she insulted me yesterday too
Elf Ranger: what? How did I insult you?
Aarakocra Warlock: YOU ASKED ME IF I LIVED IN A NEST
I feel like I need to share this beautiful moment I had in dnd today.
So we play on discord, and our DM is getting us ready for a fight with a Shadow Dragon.
He sets the scene.
Rhythm bot enters the chat.
Careless Whispers by George Michael starts playing
Thinking about how non dnd players would react if I told them that in my session today, my character (who is a bird) had to explain depth perception to a princess and that the whole party decided that all damage against enemies would be centred at the dick for no reason other that “hehehe funny”
It birthed the quote “I can’t cast Toll the Dead at a penis… unless it has a brain in there”
If you’re ever bored, I can suggest turning quotes from your dnd sessions into inspirational posts. I’ll drop a few for examples
Hi everyone!! This isn’t meme related but I did a drawing of my dnd character, Noctine (they/them)!! I’m really happy with how it came out so I thought I’d share
DM: *mentions backstory stuff*
Player:
My new dice came in today!! Making my brain go brrrrrrr
“I look respectfully terrified as I walk over” - one of my players as I introduce a buff elf woman NPC
I’m running a Skyrim one shot for a group I play with on discord and I’m so excited for it
DM: “Ah yes, the dice have spoken”
Me, on 4HP: “The dice can SHUT THE FUCK UP”
I am THIS close to making a DM persona and then just cosplaying them for my sessions… my players already refer to me as God, they should expect this
Having no life means DMing one session a week and separately playing three others …. and then wanting to DM yet another campaign bc I can
I haven’t posted on here in a while but I’d like to show everyone my favourite quotes some some dnd games I’ve DM’d/played
Fighter: “I mean the body can take the hit, the booze must survive”
Rogue: “don’t bite the hand that feeds you - go for the legs, it’ll throw them off balance”
Monk: “I’ve got twinks in my inventory!”
Sorcerer: “you went from bored to a full mental breakdown”
Fighter: “NO! You want to hear it in Infernal? NO!”
Sorcerer: “that’s one heckin tiddie window”
Monk: “shit my amour fell off! Quick, sausage sauce!” (Don’t ask me for context I can’t even remember)
Warlock: *mimicking holding phone* “hey mum can you pass me over to Satan, please?”
Druid: “you know that thing pirates do with a knife and a sail? Can I do that but with a kraken and a flaming sword?”
Adding to this list with a few new quotes I enjoyed:
Cleric: “I’m not recognising anything! Not on 7hp, I’m not!”
DM: “the ghast bleps in fear”
Bard, to an undead: “are you made of flesh?”
DM: “(Bard) jingles his bells and the alter opens”
Druid: “tits out for the King” (we were at his funeral)
Hi everyone!! I just reached 700 followers!! Thank you so much for all your support! Dnd is something I love doing and it makes me so happy that people enjoy the content I make
If you have any questions about me or anything, don’t be afraid to drop me some asks and I’ll answer them as soon as I can
Apparently I was feeling a bit extra while I was guesting in a friend’s campaign.
Normal people: “okay so that’s a dirty twenty”
Me, for some reason: “ah that’ll be a skanky little twenty”
Players: *present a character that is extremely traumatised and goes into detail about how this affects them as a person*
Me, the DM:
DM: “you are greet by a tiefling w-”
The party:
