A Separate Peace

Finny: Hey Doctor! Are the results of my tests ready? I’m dying from curiosity!

Dr. Stanpole:Heh.

Dr. Stanpole: Not only from curiosity.

Chet: What scares you the most?

Finny:Werewolves

Brinker:Sharks

Gene: The unstoppable marching of time that is slowly guiding us towards an inevitable death

Leper:Gene

Gene: If you had 10 cookies and I asked for 5 how many would you have?

Finny:None

Gene: Finny, this is basic math. Don’t mess with m-

Finny: I would give them all to you because you’re my best friend!

Gene: Gross. Absolutely disgusting. Get out of my house immediately.

Gene: One day I hope I’m the person who walks into a room and all eyes are on them

Leper: The trick is to get a really big hat and scream

Gene: I’m cold

Quackenbush: Like my heart

Gene: Now is not the time for us to debate which one of us is more dead inside

Finny: Hey Gene! Nice hair!

Gene, internally: Oh my god, the first piece of positive reinforcement I’ve received in 6 months. Respond appropriately

Gene: Thank you. I grew it myself

Gene, internally:DAMMIT!

Finny: Everything is going to be alright. It’s just a crush

Gene: Hey Finny

Finny: I’m in love with you

Gene, yelling: Brinker! Brinker!!

Finny: Brinker Hadley!!

Gene: How many Brinkers do you think there are at this school?

Gene: I may say “fuck school,” and my god do I mean it, but I’ll cry if I get a damn B

Gene: Finny, I think you should play the role of my father

Finny: I don’t wanna be your father

Gene: That’s perfect! You already know your lines

Gene: I didn’t understand why people care so much about their dumb friends until I got a dumb friend myself

Gene: I’ve only known Finny for a day and a half but if anything happened to him I’d kill everyone in this room and then myself

Brownie: Let me get this straight

Leper: More like let me run this BI you

Gene: Let’s see how this PANS out

Brinker: Hopefully we’ll ACE this

Finny:…

Finny: I’m gay.

Gene:*sneezes*

Finny: Are you sick?? Here, let me wrap you up in a blanket and make you some warm soup. You poor thing :(((

Brinker:*sneezes*

Finny: Oh my God shut the fuck up

Brinker: Gene, do you have a bag I could borrow?

Gene: The only bags I have are the ones under my eyes, and they’re specifically designed to carry the burden of my existence

Brinker: Literally all you had to do was say no

Brinker: I’ll go for a walk somewhere I’m appreciated!

Gene: That’ll be a long walk

Gene: When I’m stressed I like to go and sit on a surface that isn’t meant to be sat on because when tomorrow comes, I will be faced with even more challenges and I am too overwhelmed to be worrying about what “is” and “is not” a “chair

Finny: Okay babe, whatever you say

Finny: Gene, what did I tell you about comparing Brinker to the Devil?

Gene: That it’s offensive to the Devil?

Gene: Next time I’m opening up to someone is my autopsy

Gene: I can’t compete with you physically and you’re no match for my brains

Finny: You’re that smart?

Gene: Let me put it this way. Have you ever heard of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?

Finny:Yes

Gene:Morons

Gene, sighing: I’ve never had a real friend before…

Finny: I can be your friend!

Gene:…

Gene: I’ve also never had a boyfriend