#incorrect quote
Jack, fresh out of surgery and high on anesthesia because he’s a dumbass and almost died: whoaaaa you’re so beautiful… are you a model?
Alyssa, laughing: yeah no
Jack: who are you? what’s your name?
Alyssa: my name is Alyssa. i’m your girlfriend
Jack: w h o a
Randall: What’s your biggest fear?
Gabrielle: Being forgotten.
Randall: Damn, that’s deep.
Randall: Mine is the Kool-Aid man, but I feel kinda stupid about it, now.
Randall: Vera’s right. We have to do this. Change is inedible.
Alyssa: Don’t you mean inevitable?
Randall: *spits out a bunch of pennies*
Randall: I did not.
Randall: I want to tell you a joke but I only remember the punchline.
Gabrielle, rolling eyes: Go ahead.
Randall: Tooth-hurty.
Gabrielle, sighing: When is the best time to go to the dentist?
Randall: You complete me.
Jack: music is just wiggling air
Gabrielle: don’t do this. Don’t do this to me today.
Hamish: and colour is just wiggling light. Thank you for coming to my tedtalk.
Gabrielle: ple-
Lilith: artists and musicians are just magicians of the wiggle.
Randall: an artists best quality: their wiggles.
Gabrielle: i’m leaving the pack
Randall: *sorting through his mail*
Randall: Baby shower invitation? Haha, no thanks, Jack and Alyssa. I have a regular size shower that I can use whenever I want.
Vera: I will need that you and Jack pretend to be dating on the mission, Alyssa.
Alyssa, blushing: I… yeah, ok.
Jack: *trying to hide a smile*
Vera, knowing she’ll regret asking: What’s that, Jack?
Jack: I’ve read enough fanfics to know exactly how it will end.
Randall: since it’s impossible to know which part of my life is the middle
Randall: I have decided to have an Ongoing Crisis
Randall: i’m declaring today international ‘nothing tries to kill us’ day
Randall: anything trying to kill us today will have to just not
Nicole: if i got a dollar for every time i thought about you, i’d only have one dollar because you’re all i think about.
Lilith, voice cracking: have fun being broke, weirdo.
Randall, after kissing Nicole for some reason or another: Lilith’s gonna kill us.
Nicole: Yeah. This is a mistake.
Randall: A mistake that we’re gonna laugh about one day.
Nicole: But not today.
Randall: Oh, no. Today’s gonna be a mess.
Lilith: This may shock you but not everyone here likes you.
Gabrielle, filing her nails: Sounds ridiculous but go on.
Randall: I’ve been flirting with you for 2 years.
Gabrielle, unimpressed: Do you really consider finger guns flirting?!
Vera: Are you working on the spell?
Jack: My book is open, I have a knife in my hand and I’m not about to get up and do something else.
Jack: But no, I’m thinking about the beatles.
Alyssa: I can’t believe we’re stuck in this stupid forest together!
Jack, burning the map: truly unfortunate
Vera: Of course I care about everyone in the order equally.
Hamish: We were attacked while you were away.
Vera: Is Jack okay?!
Randall: If I punch myself and it hurts, am I strong or weak?
Jack: Strong.
Alyssa: Weak.
Lilith: An idiot.
Vera: I hope you all have a verygood explanation for this.
Randall: We have four, actually.
Jack: We couldn’t decide on one.
Lilith: So you can pick your favorite.
Hamish: I’m so sorry about them.
Randall: Hey, it was your idea in all of these!
Gabriel, putting on shades: Hope you like bad boys because I’m bad at everything.
Have you ever thinked so hard a person and then cried?
