#nct shitpost
haechan: this date is boring
mark: this isn’t a date. i told you i was going to the store
haechan: then why did you invite me?
mark: i specifically said “don’t come with me” and you said “fuck you, i can do whatever i want” and followed me here
i hate kpop, thank god johnny is just a boy who eats sugar.
kun: ten, why is there a green bird knocking on our door?
ten:*rapidly locking the windows* i didn’t finish today’s duolingo lesson
johnny:you’re going to regret this. mark my words.
mark: *running over with a dictionary*
johnny: thank you mark
waiter: i’m sorry sir, but your card has been declined
taeyong: run it again
waiter: we ran it 3 times
*taeyong to jaehyun*: oh my- this is so embarrassing, do you mind taking care of it?
jaehyun: no problem! [grabs waiter by the collar and pulls him close] he said run it again
y'all mind if renjun expresses his feelings for you?
Jungwoo: Guys…I think I like boys
Johnny:Oh you didn’t know? We’ve known for like months
Jungwoo:Wait what?
Johnny: Trust me, ain’t no man can move his hips like that and be straight
Interviewer: Hello welcome, and you guys are?
Yukhei:Fabulous
Sicheng:Depressed
Yangyang:Hungery
Ten:Gay
Kun:…..Wayv?
Taeyong: What do you got there Haechan?
Haechan: Oh, you know just a Mother’s Day card for the best mother in the world
Taeyong: Aw Haechan-
Haechan: [Looks Taeyong dead in the eyes as he hands the card to Suho]
Haechan: You can’t say bubbles in a threating tone
Chenle: Bet
Later
Renjun: Hey, why is Chenle on the roof screaming bubbles?
Johnny: Why are your tongues purple?
Jeno: We had slushies, I had a blue one.
Jaemin: And I had a red one.
Johnny: Oh.
Johnny:
Johnny: OH-WAIT
Mark: You drank each other’s slushies?
Things NCT have said that you can hear:
“OH YOU ARE NANA?”
“Okayyyyyyyyyy~”
“FiGhTiNg HaEyAdWaE !¡!”
“Oh daddy”
“Ty track, ty track”
“ˢᵏᵃʳᵘᵗ”
”Whats up we’re the uh-Foregin swaggers”
“I lived in America for four years man”
“Johnnys Fashion Evaluation”
“Johns Banana?”
“NOOOoooo Chittaprrrrrrrr”
