long time no see

jeno: bananas have a radioactive isotope in them. to avoid a lethal dose of radiation, you must refrain from eating 600 bananas per second

jaemin: there goes my friday night

4:08pm: author!mark frantically texts neurosurgeon!jaemin.

Mark: HELP URGENT what do i need to damage to prevent facial recognition???

(Read at 4:10pm.)

Jaemin: Amygdala

Mark: THANK YUO

Mark: YOU

mark pushes his glasses higher up his nose bridge and pulls himself in his wheelie chair closer into his desk. his fingers find the keyboard in front of him and resume an excited pace, his eyes darting across his screen, getting lost in his own story.

01 liners drinking party

sungchan: /takes a sip of goryangju at chenle’s house/

sungchan, holding back visible tears: /winces/ not bad

chenle: weak /downs entire shot/

chenle, now also holding back visible tears: see? weak.

sungchan: i see tears

chenle, blinking profusely:incorrect

idk lol

shotaro: how many holes does a straw have

jisung: 2, of course

chenle: pfft no you ass it’s 1

jisung: (looking at sungchan expectantly) well?

sungchan:

sungchan: hear me out

sungchan: if a straw has 1 hole, then technically your mouth and your asshole-

jisung: NOOO WE’RE ON AIR

꒰ʰⁱᵗˢ ᵇˡᵘⁿᵗ ˢᵉʳⁱᵉˢ꒱

y'all mind if renjun expresses his feelings for you?

MainDance line wishes they were this good:

GQ Interview:

“How I, Kim Doyoung succumbed to the influence of the hoe line”

“Your crush is behind you act natural”

Stages of Math Class

Teacher explaining material:

Teacher doing a practice question making it look easy:

Getting all the hard questions for homework:

Having to explain it on the board the next day:

AM I TRIPPING OR DOES ANYONE ELSE HEAR IT

What will happen if SM keeps up this bullshit:

Breakdown of Mark’s chaotic 10 min live

Trying on filters:

Cameos:

Cameos talking about popped vein in eyeball:

Questioning sanity matching icons:

Mark confronting avid fan:

In Conclusion

A thousand years of death on y’all asses

Paranoia Level: J a e m i n 

Started from the bottom now we’re here

Who let Winwin breathe around NCT

Jaemin is my mood all day every day:

First wins either be

Or

Nct: decides to make a song in English

Me: Ah shit here we go again