#overlord anime
Ainz:Remember that cooperative dinner you had me plan with the floor guardians so we could try and resolve some issues?
Enri:Yeah?
Ainz:Well, it blew up in my face.
Enri: What happened?
Ainz:Screaming and tears and physical threats, Shalltear threatened to stab Albedo, Mare said fuck, never heard him say that before. I don’t remember where that came from, but it was messy.
Enri: No, I mean, why did it all fall apart?
Ainz: Oh. No one was assigned the dishes.
Zanac:Sister tell me the truth, okay? ‘Cause there’s been a lot of lying in this family.
Renner:And a lot of love.
Zanac:More lies.
Albedo:I know you think my judgements clouded because of my love for lord Ainz.
Demiurge:You doodled your wedding invitation on mission reports.
Albedo:No, that’s our joint tombstones.
Demiurge:My mistake.
Aura: Lord Ainz I need your help.
Ainz:Who are we killing?
Ainz:Now, I don’t do humans. That’s a rule.
Ainz:But that rule is negotiable if the humans a dick.
If only Foresight was a skill
Demiurge:*Relaying part 115 of of his grand master plan*
Ainz:I wonder what it feels like to know what the fuck is going on.
Demiurge:Why did I sign up for this?
Sebas:To help make the world a better place?
Demiurge:Oh. No. Actually it was because I jump at opportunity to play god, but the question was rhetorical.
Demiurge:Why do people always say ‘watch your back, I’ll be coming for you’?
Demiurge:Don’t tell people you want to kill them, just drive a knife into their spine and be done with it.
Demiurge:It’s so much easier.
Sebas: It’s considered polite to let someone know you’re their enemy.
Demiurge:Polite - it’s murder.
Ainz:I have a bad feeling about this.
Demiurge:What do you mean my lord?
Ainz:Don’t you ever get that small voice inside your head telling you something is going to get you in trouble?
Demiurge:No?
Ainz:That…that actually explains a lot.
Shalltear:These so-called “feelings” are ruining my reputation as a heartless bitch.
Albedo:You have to pick your battles.
Demiurge: One of the battles we picked was to stop Aura and Mare from running huge plastic tubes all over Nazarick and placing Hamsuke inside of them.
Albedo: They were gonna call it Tube City.
Sebas:There is only one thing worse than dying.
Sebas:*Rips off paper revealing “Humans dying”*
Demiurge:Humans.
Sebas:No.
Albedo:I love knitting needles. I can make a scarf.
Albedo:I can make a hat. I can stab my enemies eyes out. I can make mittens.
Ainz:What was that middle part?
Albedo: I can make a hat.
Shalltear:I’m playing a game. It’s called I take a shot every time I feel depressed.
Sebas:That game exists and it’s called alcoholism.
A unknown demon approaches
Ainz:Demiurge, we must be very careful. We don’t know what we might find in there.
Demiurge:*Walking through the door* Hey there, demons. It’s me, ya boi.
Ainz:Of course I care about all my floor guardians equally.
Shalltear:We were attacked while you were away.
Ainz:Is Mare okay!?
Sebas :My Lord I believe you and Albedo broke your bed last night.
Sebas:I will have a new one brought to you immediately.
Shalltear:It must have been wild. I would never be so disrespectful as to destory Lord Ainz property.
Ainz:Haha…Yeah..
*Last Night*
Ainz:Bet you can’t jump high enough to touch the ceiling.
Albedo:A worthy challenge my lord I accept.
Climb:Are you a bad guy?
Ainz: Well, that’s all a matter of perspective, isn’t it?
Climb:Ha! Gotcha! That’s exactly the kind of stuff bad guys say!
Jircniv:Lord Ainz I never considered you an enemy.
Ainz: I never considered you at all.
Jircniv: Now that’s just hurtful.
Mare:I’m tough.
Aura:Prove it
Mare:Fine fight me.
Ainz: *From where Mare can’t see or hear him* Do not touch my sweet angel if you wish to see the light of day again.
Jircniv:No one accuses Emperor Jircniv Rune Farlord El Nix of apathy!
Fluder:With all due respect sir, no one’s got the time.