#sad girl hour

I’m tired of hearing I’m sorry… cause when I look at you, deep down I know you’ll do again. And that’s what hurts me most…

If only I can craft my emotions the way I compose my pieces. With a backspace or an eraser for the feelings that wouldn’t fit their expectations. Maybe then, I’d be loved more.

The things I’d give, to hear you to tell you me one last time those three crazy words…

“i love you.”

Anxiety keeps me lively when the sun hides and the moon shines. The saddest parts of me also overcomes my heart with second guesses and replays the darkest times. And I lay there in the silence of the night wishing I can silence them both to finally rest my soul. But the fear of not being able to crawl out of that hole of insecurities, shame and failure gets higher every second.

And that’s when I realized that for 10 years, I’m still running from the numbness of my broken heart.