#sexual trauma
The Art, of moving and moving on.
Recently (well two years ago) I moved houses into a smaller house downsizing due to finances.
There is something to be said about picking up and leaving everything behind in a house, the same goes for mental and emotional challenges, and mental health in general.
I kept having to ask myself “what is so bothersome about moving from this house?”
I did not have many good memories there, all in all it was pretty bad.
Though the few good memories I had I wanted to hold on to for dear life.
But was it the memories keeping me hold there? No.
In particular was it the good memories?
Most definitely not.
It was the way the stairs creaked, so I’d knew how to not wake my parents, it was the way the lock locked, and which way the wall pointed to my bed.
It was that feeling of comfortability. The same thing can be said about trauma.
We get stuck in this comfort. The idea that yes I may be hit or abused or raped, but at least I’ll know how it feels.
It is not trauma that makes us insane. It’s realizing what happened was never normal.
When I was assaulted multiple times by this man, I wasn’t affected all that much, sure the physical aspect had me sore to the point where it hurt to sit down, and the bruises ached.
Yet as long as I held onto that denial I was okay.
Because I developed a comfort in knowing what had happened.
Healing is hard because whether you suffered sexual, physical, emotion or all of the abuse combined you are not only going to have to recognize what happened to you is wrong.
But you are going to have to come to grips and embrace the discomfort that comes along with that realization.
(Patented) -Jade
“Being traumatised means continuing to organise your life as if the trauma were still going on - unchanged and immutable - as every new encounter or event is contaminated by the past.”— Bessel Van Der Kolk, “The Body Keeps The Score” (via not-painted-anymore)
Somebody please get me this shirt gahh
Don’t forget to drink something.
Don’t forget to take your medication.
Don’t forget to eat something. Even when it’s just a little bit.
Don’t forget that you’re beautiful and that I’m proud of you for being here today.
You’re very precious.
Take care.
For patients with a history of sexual trauma, pelvic exams may trigger PTSD symptoms. The techniques of trauma-informed care can lead to an easier exam.
Studies show that trauma survivors want providers to ask about sexual trauma before the exam (that is, while the patient is clothed and seated). During the exam, patients prefer that the clinician listens, anticipates each step of the procedure, and affirms the patient’s control over the exam. For example, giving women the option of self-inserting the speculum has been shown to lower patients’ anxiety and pain.
Clinicians should use the following patient-centered techniques to lower patients’ anxiety:
- Establish rapport before the exam. In some cases, this means doing the exam at a separate visit.
- Invite the patient to suggest measures that will make her more comfortable with the exam.
- Allow a support person to accompany the patient during the exam.
- Allow the patient to choose a female examiner if she prefers this.
- Before starting, inform the patient that the exam will stop if she feels uncomfortable. Assure her that she has control over the pace.
- Tell the patient about each step of the exam right before it happens.
- Keep the patient’s body covered, exposing only the areas being examined.
- Encourage the patient to breathe abdominally in order to relax her pelvic floor muscles.
- Rest the unopened speculum against the patient’s vagina so that she can get used to the sensation before the speculum is inserted and opened.
- Use the smallest possible speculum.
- Use lubricant.
- Offer self-insertion of the speculum.
- Offer frog-leg positioning without stirrups. Call stirrups “foot rests.”
If the patient does not want to continue the exam, the clinician should stop, inquire about the patient’s needs, and proceed only when the patient is ready.
This is how all exams should be performed - we never know who has experienced trauma.
Post link
