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A few months ago I started learning and practicing Shibari “Japanese rope bondage” it’s a very artistic mindful practice and I have made it part of my weekly regimen. I thought it was just a kink I wanted to explore but I didn’t expect it to become a coping skill for my anxiety I have found it’s helped my anxiety my dissociative disorder and sensory processing disorder and over all my confidence. When I was first learning it took patients I watched YouTube tutorials and paused and rewound over and over again I would get tangled up and frustrated I would mess up and start over I focused all my energy on learning and found my mind less cluttered of all the intrusive thoughts I struggle with daily… I could quite my mind just like some may do with arts and crafts or a beloved hobby this might even be considered a hobby. For me it’s more of a lifestyle. As I learned how to tie my first harness I was so proud of myself for sticking to something until completed and added boosts of confidence as I looked at my beautiful body bound in rope I felt sexy and empowered. and the results reminded me of a tight hug like the same feeling I get from my very therapeutic weighted blanket. Dealing with dissociating I loose connection with my body. describe able to an out of body experience rope helps me be aware of myself to feel where each body part is and how it’s being hugged it a simple term rope grounds me and keeps me present. with anxiety it’s easy to get lost in racing thoughts that create panic soon I might be breathing heavy and my heart racing and you would think being retrained would cause more panic but now I have no other choice but to take deep breaths and find my calm the rope helps guide my breath steady. As I take a deep breath in… my lungs expand my ribs widen and feel the rope grasp me tighter as if whispering to me its okay you are safe you are present you are here in this moment and as I exhale I feel the rope loosen it’s loving grip still wrapped around me just a bit lighter .. the rope sighed a relief with me as I’m assured everything is okay I am present I am grounded I am loved … I don’t know how to explain all of this so I went to google to find out other people have used rope to help them just like me it’s not for everyone but for some it’s fucking magic . What I find fascinating is that you are literally binding yourself and liberating yourself … how freeing it is to me. In my past I have been In Situations where I was held against my will. I could not escape I was trapped I was traumatized now living with PTSD from multiple sexual assaults I have a fear of being held down of not being able to escape to get away a fear to protect myself from such threats… with rope and self knotts …I am the captor the captive and the liberator . I am in control completely I am submissive to my self it is a practice of self love . And a powerful feeling with in myself that I have control of my body I say what goes. I create the feeling and I take it away . A relationship i create within myself. And new way to trust. To find peace in the uncomfortable till it becomes comfortable soothing I can relate the process to yoga . The captor the captive the liberator getting to play all these rolls in one setting is in empowering to say the least . There something about psychologically that I haven’t quite figured out yet but it helps my mind It finds a way to heal the wounded parts of me . It soothes me it liberates me empowers me. Frees me loves me keeps me focused grounded happy loved.

To wrap this up idk how to but I’ll try my best ….. I consider myself a rope bunny now although I’m an amateur and have only learned self knotts I’m excited to go further with my trusted Dom/master to tie me up himself in more confined restraints to let someone else do this to me requires a great deal of trust for me and most. I have a very loving relationship with my Dom . When I started Shibari I thought it to be something to bring more kink into my sex life but you see it’s so much more then that… I have played while bound and enjoy it very much I’m ready to have my arms tied behind my back and try other more retained knotts and I’m even excited to be suspended into the air wrapped in the Beauty of rope. The possibility’s are endless and it is a art to me … and mindful task I’ll say again a grounding activity … and empowering hobbie and loveing motion . A freeing feeling I can not describe… Shibari much more then that . Thanks for tuning in have a beautiful day loves