Volevo solo farvi sapere che, se mai aveste bisogno di un aiuto, vi sentite particolarmente giù di morale, avete un problema, grave o meno che sia, io sono qui. Mi piacerebbe aiutarvi o farvi sorridere almeno un pò. Potete mandarmi un messaggio o, se è per timidezza, potete dirmelo in anonimo. a qualunque ora, sono disponibile.
I have been very inactive here lately, sorry about that! Just want to let you know I’m still here, it’s just that I’m very busy but sick to.
As soon as I’m feeling better and have some more time I’ll get back to posting! If you have any requests or questions feel free to send me a message! I’d love to chat with you guys ❤️
Tumblr is having another ~moment~ in the media, so I’ve been thinking about how Tumblr gifsets have been a huge part of how I consumed pop cultural visual media for the past decade or so. I can’t think of any other website (that I use anyway) that utilizes gifs in this way.
A lot of pop cultural discussion websites are text-oriented (here thinking of the dearly departed TWOP and its slew of replacements). Reddit has that but also more noise and more memes. I don’t know how conversation occurs on other websites; I can’t envision it. But with gifsets, Tumblr creators are able to distill their favorite shows down to some kind of ineffable essence conveyed precisely in the form of its own medium, and not awkwardly translated into transcription or commentary, or literally re-cut as clips that rob a potential viewer of their true first-time experience.
With a gifset, a creator is saying, “These are some parallels that I have noticed are artistically interesting in some way,” or “These are moments that have touched me in some way, that I want to relive through the dissemination of this gifset.” And that’s it, no additional commentary (I mean we can talk about tags later). I am interpreting someone else’s interpretation of an entertainment product, before I ever experience that product myself. The gifset creator brings their followers to the doorstep of that experience, but we walk through with our own preconceptions or misconceptions. I may imagine and envision something based on a gifset that does not exist in the actual product (think of all the meme posts that ask people to describe what they think a show is about, based solely on gifs they’ve seen on Tumblr), but I imagine and anticipate on that basis, too, and it’s an experience not available on other pop culture/social media websites.
I know I’m super late in announcing this, but I only just now found time to post.
This art blog, for the most part, is SFW. I don’t post anything super-duper-omg-explicit on here. That being said, a handful of my art did get flagged as NSFW by Tumblr’s new algorithm, and a bunch of my art friends that occasionally do NSFW are leaving.
Personally, even though I don’t do NSFW on this blog, the new change still rubs me the wrong way, as it’s essentially censorship in a place that had marketed itself as accepting and a safe space. I have other stories to tell…but I’ll save those for a rainy day. To me, art is art, and so long as whatever you draw makes you happy and isn’t hurting anybody in real life, then you can draw whatever you want. This is the realization I came upon when I was very, very young, and it’s still the view I hold to this day.
I’ll still be around and updating this Tumblr, but if you want to know where to reach me better, Twitter is the place. My name is “konaharts” on there. Right now it’s a dump of Noctis and Ardynoct garbage…and soon-to-be Smash crack pairings stuff…but hey. xD
I also have a Pillowfort.io account, and I am “konaharts” on there too. c: But I haven’t posted anything there yet. I will most likely be posting my more risque stuff on there, along with whatever’s posted on here. And unlike here, I can actually follow back since it won’t be a secondary blog, so that’s exciting for me. xD
But yeah…I don’t know how to end this post, so I’ll just end it. Haha.
For starters, I’ve been having issues with my heart rate for over a year now. In the past, I’ve had problems with pericardial effusion and pleurisy a few times. My heart has almost failed twice within the past two years. I can’t remember exactly when, but I’ll say around…April of 2021? Is when my heart rate issues became worse. My resting heart rate is 76 - 88; usually, this is when I’m lying down or sitting for more than 20 minutes. When I sit up completely, my heart rate will go to 110 - 125 or 136. When I stand, it goes to the 140s or 160s. After showering, my heart rate hits 180 - 191. So far, the highest heart rate I’ve had is 198. My symptoms for the past few months has been stomach pain, brain fog, nausea, vomiting, headaches/migraines, dizziness, lightheadedness, random blurry vision that’ll last for up to 10 - 20 minutes, chest pain, shortness of breath, skin sensitivity, painful red patches on arms, leg swelling, painful/uncomfortable bloating, weakness, fatigue, a few fainting spells, and much more but I can’t remember them all at the moment. My current diagnoses are Lupus (SLE), Rheumatoid Arthritis, TMJ, and Raynaud’s syndrome.
Is anyone going through this or has gone through this? If so, what tests were run or recommended? Did you get a diagnosis?
I really need to know. I’ve been dealing with this for so long now. It’s interfering with my day-to-day life and daily activities. I can’t even talk or laugh without my heart rate going up to 126. The lightheadedness and dizzy spells are happening daily, and I’m afraid that I’ll pass out. The stomach issues I’ve been having have made it difficult and painful to eat and drink. It feels like my stomach is on fire 24/7 and being ripped open every once in a while. My doctors think I could have another possible autoimmune disease, either fibromyalgia or a connective tissue disorder (I dislocate almost daily). I’m not trying to self-diagnose myself, but I’ve been wondering if POTS could be another possible diagnosis? From what I’ve been able to research, the symptoms I’ve been experiencing are pretty similar, but I know Lupus can be the cause behind a lot as well. I also know that Lupus can be the cause of POTS. I just want to find out as much as I can to bring some things up to my doctors since they’re just as confused as I am, haha. I’m tired of dealing with this and need relief.
I am in so much pain today. My mental health is taking a hit too. I have no one to vent to since I’m the “therapist” or “sunshine energy” friend, and no one wants to hear about my issues. They’ve shown me that… I feel alone at the moment. I try so hard to keep up my bubbly and optimistic persona, but it’s hard today… it’s hard to smile genuinely. It’s hard even to think that this will get better. I’ve been in a full-blown lupus flare for two years, which has caused my health to decline rapidly. I’m a very independent person, so losing my independence slowly is fucking with me. I’m on the verge of a breakdown. I just want the pain the stop…I want to stop feeling so tired and weak…I just want it all to stop.
