#tsukishima x yamaguchi
”How about YOU just interview the witness and I’ll look intimidating from the corner?”
”I bought the coffee, we made a deal.”
——
Detective Tsukkiyama for @soktokki s dtiys~
“A level-headed, disciplined shield… and its best possible partner, one that makes its decisions easy… a sharp spear. That is the ideal serve and blockstrategy.”
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You’re NOT meant to be a succubus
Chapter 6: The beginning
It’s been a long time!! Maybe many here do not remember my existence, but with all this subject of censorship on Tumblr, I wanted to avoid a bad time.
[Chapter1][Chapter2][Chapter3][Chapter4][Chapter5]
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Yamaguchi: meet my boyfriend 6'2 of salt, sarcasm and bad manners! (◡‿◡✿)
Tsukishima:[hissing]
Some scans of the latest chapter of haikyuu…..
Trying not to freak
Trying not to
Trying not
Trying
…..
HXHDNDIDJD LOOK AT HINATAS SMILE???????
HIM AND KAGS STILL HANG AND I DNFMNFFK
CAN WE PUH-UH-LEASE TALK ABOUT HOW YAMAGUCHI TUSKISHIMA AND YAICHI ALL WENT TO COLLEGE TOGETHER
FUCKING GUSHING OVER THIS SHIT MANS
Okay so what good reason do they have to stare at each other during a team huddle?
those eyes are screaming “gomen tsukki” and they need not use any word for it
Untitled tsukkiyama, Rhythm on the Court verse, or Liz was bored and salty at work
To say that Tsukishima was in a bad mood was the understatement of the century. He had the bad luck of working a weekend shift when he wasn’t supposed to, as his regular coworker, Sato, had gone and eaten conbini food that had gone bad. It didn’t help that it was supposed to be a day spent with Yamaguchi and his boys hiking up a mountain, the attraction of being away from the crowded city appealing to Tsukishima’s miserly heart. As it was, he was the only person on staff not on vacation who could mix IV bags with any amount of competence and not imprisoned in a toilet due to questionable decisions.
This particular day was a slow day, with the space between new orders far too long for Tsukishima’s liking, and the extra work completed hours ago. He gave a languid spin to his chair, focusing on one of the metal intersections that held up the ceiling’s tiles. The pockmarks that textured the tiles became concentric circles as his chair moved in place, doing nothing to dull the boredom that was still preferable to joining the dispensary staff outside his anteroom.
It was in the fifth free spin, just as the chair was beginning to slow, that Tsukishima became aware of the buzz coming from his phone on the counter. Placing his feet firmly on the ground, he unlocked his phone to find that Yamaguchi had sent him a selfie with a stunning vista in the background. He must have crouched to take the picture, because Yamaguchi’s face was level with Takeshi and Takenori. Tsukishima idly wondered how many tries and which combination of filters it took to make this picture what it was, which was a perfect grouping of his favorite people.
Right after he set the picture as his computer’s background, he returned to the message to reply.
Me: I hate you. I hate you so much right now.
Tsukishima studied the larger picture he had set to make his work station more home-like, marveling at how the sun reflected off the growing number of freckles that each of the three photographed people sported. On his sons, they were cute, and served to hide the fact that they were steadily growing into their father’s twisted sense of humour. On Yamaguchi, Tsukishima couldn’t help but think about new ways to connect-the-dots, not unlike that notable time with strawberry flavored cake icing as he worshipped Yamaguchi’s body.
The phone that was still clutched in Tsukishima’s hand vibrated three times in quick succession, and as he read the messages, he couldn’t help but laugh.
Tadashi: think of this as payback for the fries.
Tadashi: but dont worry, ill make it up to you
Tadashi:( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Tsukishima’s thoughts flickered quickly to the moment in question. He had taken a selfie featuring a red fry box in the foreground of the shot and wrapping his tongue lewdly around a particularly long fry. He had the short term satisfaction of receiving several texts full of button mashed incomprehensiblity, and the long term satisfaction of being barely able to sit at his hood the next day. The memory of Yamaguchi taking total control burned into his skin even weeks later.
Me: I’m holding you to that.
The raw ache inside of him immediately took him back to his second year of high school, before the fear of losing Yamaguchi took complete hold and turned him into a heartless monster whose assumptions broke two people with a single sentence, causing a rift between the two that lasted for nearly twelve years. If he had not been stuck in an area where anyone could walk in at any moment, Tsukishima would have slipped his hand under his hospital-issued scrubs and taken care of his growing problem as if he were fifteen again instead of being in his thirties. As it was, he thought of his last conversation with Hinata, who reveled in sharing every lascivious detail about his relationship with Kageyama, and that sufficiently killed the mood that had started to develop.
As the fax machine spit out some actual work for him to complete, Tsukishima felt his phone come to life again.
Tadashi: ill even bring the rope.
Tsukishima: I have very standards. You can’t just ask me to choose someone one the spot-
Yamaguchi: *Trips over his own foot and falls into the supplies closet.*
Tsukishima:..
Tsukishima: I want that one.
Yamaguchitryinghis very best to bake a cake: -now I just whisk the cream and.. wait where did the whisk go?
Yamaguchi: Tsukki! I still need to use that! Don’t lick it!
Tsukishima: It’s either you or the whisk.
Yamaguchi:..
Tsukishima: *smirks*
Yamaguchi: *Grabs the whisk* Get out of my kitchen you damn perverted dinosaur.
Yamaguchi: I’m trying to make a cake, not a porno.
Yamaguchi: Hey Tsukki?
Tsukishima: [Reading a book]
Yamaguchi: Tsukki, I need something. [Pokes him]
Tsukishima:…
Yamaguchi: Tsukki! [Pokes him again]
Tsukishima:..
Yamaguchi: [Pokes Tsukishima repeatedly]
Yamaguchi: TSUUUUUUKKIIIIIIIII!!
Tsukishima:If you STOP poking me, I might just answer!
Yamaguchi: I said I need something!
Tsukishima: [Groans] What do you need?
Yamaguchi: [Pokes his nose]
Yamaguchi: Attention.
Saltyshima
Tsukishima: love is dead and never existed. all you did was betray me while i lay sick and festering. you are the definition of dread.
Daichi: are you okay?
Tsukishima: yamaguchi ate my strawberry shortcake
~
Note // I saw a post similar to this for a different fandom and it completely reminded me of saltyshima
Yamaguchi: Has anyone ever told you that you’re kind of an asshole?
Tsukishima: No. Has anybody ever told you shut the hell up?
Yamaguchi: You’re just proving my point…
It’s not like i draw like a god or something like that. Just look at Yamaguchi’s face, it’s bigger than Tsukkishima’s! But i tried the best i could, and this is a thing to practice my painting more than anything. So, i hope you like it! Tsukkiyama 4C
I think this is aDORABLE AND I LOVE IT
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Haikyuu ships in Quarantine because I am OBsEssEd! These are my main ships, sorry if they don’t vibe with yall.
- Kagehina: Fighting one moment, violently making out the next. Tried to play volleyball in the house because they don’t understand that stay at home doesn’t mean you can’t go outside at all. They broke everything. Kageyama’s new hobby is playing with Hinata’s hair while they watch old volleyball games.
- Tsukkiyama: Ah! These two are soft! Tsukki and Yams cuddle so much! It’s a lot of soft music, low lights, and books. They’re a lot smarter than Hinata and Kageyama and they go for walks and practice in the mornings. Yams cooks a lot, and Tsukki puts little braids in his hair while they watch movies and talk about their lives.
- Asanoya: why??? is noya???? the calm one now??!?! Asahi is losing his mind, the anxiety of watching the whole world go to pieces has him in a constant state of terror. Noya bans the news, he distracts Asahi with kisses and arts and crafts and other stuff
- Daisuga: Suga goes full crackhead! “No responsibility, let’s dye my hair and eat our weight in ice cream! Daichi, I miss our kouhai!” Daichi keeps Suga’s impulses under control for the most part, but he does help Suga color his hair a dusky pink, and winds up LOVING it and Suga even more.
- IwaiOi: “Iwachan~lets watch conspiracies!” Oikawa is soft, his hair is damp and he smells like his lavender body wash, Iwaizumi will never say it out loud, but this is his favorite Tooru. In the end, he doesn’t need to say it, Oikawa knows it when Iwaizumi pulls him into his lap as Oiks hits play on a Shane Dawson video.
- Kuroken: they literally play video games for the first week until kenma of all people finally calls it off and after a trip to the store kuroo is helping kenma rebleach his hair, he likes washing Kenma’s hair too much, almost as much as kenma likes him washing his hair
- Bokuaka: Bokuto learns how to knit, Akaashi is slightly embarrassed but he wears the terrible hole infested socks and barely together sweaters his boyfriend worked so hard on anyway. He himself passes the time by actually doing his homework unlike almost everybody else.
- Kyoutani/Yahaba: Their whole quarantine is NSFW with brief intermissions to hydrate and eat. Oikawa once had to hang up a video call and try to forget the trauma of what he had seen. Also Yahaba has not stopped bumping Lana Del Rey’s entire discography since all of this started, that and a copious amount of wine and kyoutani calm his nerves.
- LevYaku: this is cute, yaku just spends the whole time rubbing his giant russian’s back and watching Tiger King, Lev sleeps with his head in Yaku’s lap and learns how to bake until he almost burns down the house and then yaku takes over.
- Ukatake: these two aren’t together yet but they will be by the end of this quarantine. Takeda moves in with ukai for the quarantine when Ukai mentions that he has nothing but beer, microwaveable corndogs, and cigarettes in his house. Takeda buys good food and Ukai falls in love with soft Takeda while they get beer drunk for two weeks straight.
Okay so like Demigod!Haikyuu crossover is blowing my mind rn. So here is this dumpster fire
- Hinata is an ADORABLE child of Apollo, and he still loves Volleyball but he’s naturally really good at archery too! Definetly in love with Kageyama
- Kageyama looks like he’d be powerful, everyone assumes he’d be a child of Zeus, Posiedon, or Hades, but he always enjoys the look of fear in their eyes when he robs the world of light, as only a child of Nyx (goddess of the night) could, smitten with sunshine aka Hinata
- Tsukki is a son of Athena, which really didn’t shock anyone,especially not Tsukki, though he does take issue with some of his more “unexpected” siblings, whipped for Yama and formulated a business regarding a certain illicit plant
- Yamaguchi can nurture and grow things so naturally that he is claimed as a child of Demeter almost instantaneously (he definetly doesn’t grow any illegal plants with his powers) he and Tsukki have a lot of money, no one knows why
- Tanaka is a son of Aries in the most stereotypical sense and he’s found his people
- Noya loves his half brother, Tanaka, but he still absolutely destroys him in sword play, the two sons of aries are impossible on the battle field, thinks Asahi is a damsel in distress
- Enoshita is a son of Hestia, goddess of the home and hearth, because he is steady and grounded in a way that many envy
- Asahi is a son of Iris, the goddess of rainbows, because not only is he precious but he’s also inherited his mother’s eye for color, not as big on battle, Noya thinks this is adorable
- Sugawara is the head of the Aphrodite cabin, and probably the most likeable member, also probably one of the most dangerous, has a thing for sons of aries (like his mom), mainly just one son of aries
- Daichi struggles to keep his brothers in check, but no other child of aries is up for the job so as the most level headed kid in that whole cabin, Daichi steps up, when he’s not playing dad to his siblings, he’s trying to impress a particularly mischievous son of Aphrodite
- Kiyoko is a huntress of Artemis
- Yachi is a very helpful nymph
- Oikawa is Suga’s brother and the self proclaimed “hottest son of aphrodite” he likes to act like he is a ladies man but everyone knows he has eyes for one son of Aries
- Bless Iwaizumi son of aries, and the only person next to Daichi who can keep the other unruly aries children in line, says he hates oikawa but was caught in the aphrodite cabin with him, many,many times
- Kyoutani is a son of hades. No one is surprised. He hates everyone. Except Yahaba. Yahaba is okay.
- Yahaba is a particularly aggressive child of aphrodite who definetly does not want to marry a certain son of hades (suga and oikawa tease him all the time)
- It’s Kuroo he’s the unexpected child of Athena, and everyone is confused, but these things dont always make sense and Tsukki has to have something go wrong
- Kenma is a very quick witted child of Hermes who is definetly in on Tsukki and Yama’s…scheme
- Akaashi keeps the peace in the Athena cabin, and spends a considerable amount of time with a certain son of Hermes
- Bokuto is a reluctant son of Hermes, who uses most of his brain power hitting on Akaashi
- Ushijima is the son of Demeter, and knows absolutely nothing about his younger brother’s illicit plants or his boyfriend’s (tendou) inate proclivity for maddness
- Tendou is the freakiest son of Dionysus ever, he positively reeks of madness and Ushijima
