#frostironfudge

LIVE

If Only I Could Get To You First (Bucky Barnes One Shot)

Summary: Bucky Barnes and you have been best-friends, but unknowing to the other you both are also in love with the other. Though everyone else seems to know.

Pairing: Modern!Bucky Barnes x Plus Size!Fem!Reader

Warnings: Modern AU, swearing, past domestic abuse (non descriptive), mutual pining, fake dating, confessions, best friends, angst, fluff, i just want to squish bucky into a hug, brock rumlow is a dick head, hurt/comfort, love confessions, crying, loving from afar

playlist:taylor swift: treacherous (taylors version)/mohit chauhan: dooriyan (from ‘love aaj kal’ 2015)/aditi singh sharma & arijit singh: raabta (night in a motel) highly recommend this song seriously.

a.n.originally this was supposed to be full of angst, but it turned into this beautiful world of feels.

Word Count:10k

Main Masterlist||My AO3

In the list of bad ideas your best friend compelled you into, only two ever worked out in your favour. 

One was sneaking into your first high school party, you’d had your first kiss. 

The second was when she pushed you onto the dance floor at the frat house’s halloween party and you bumped into the warlock.

“Woah, easy there.” He’d caught you with a charming grin and his blue eyes. Your lungs would not breathe till he would tell you too.

“Are you alright?” Those blue eyes to a once over, checking for any sign of injury.

“I’m—I’m so sorry, I lost my footing.” You look to the side to glare at your best friend but she is luckily not in your line of vision.

“Woah, doll, who is on the receiving end of that glare?” He wonders loudly over the music which somehow doesn’t bother you.

“My best friend pushed me.” You explain, sighing.

“We could work on a hex.” He offers, you let out a laugh, he’d interpreted your last minute outfit well enough, deep red turtle neck and skirt with a borrowed blonde wig.

“You’re the first person to know who am I.” You smile, he bows.

“The others are beneath our intellect. Do you want to move to the side?” 

You nod, his hand finds yours and the night floats away.

“James Barnes, warlock for tonight. What is your name Sabrina Spellman?” He offers his name and then you give him yours.

Conversation flows on, in the little nook of the house.

Movies, TV Shows, a heavy argument about Professor Snape and Dumbledore and then academic choices. 

Time went on numbers exchanged, as were memes.

Coffee tumblers refilled over hours every Wednesday.

Movie marathons, study dates, celebrating A pluses and even the occasional C minus.

Pranking his very unhygienic third roommate by placing cups of detergent all over his room and a few cups of water.

————————————————–

You had known his close friends called him Bucky, it was never defined across the months of your blooming friendship if you could call him that name.

Bucky wondered why you hadn’t yet, maybe you did not consider him as close as he presumed. He had no inclination to ask out of fear to ruin the friendship he found within you.

it changed one night, at three a.m. your phone vibrated near your head, you were still dressed in the day’s clothes. Work had been terrible, so you deserved a night off of regular activities.

Reaching for the angrily vibrating device your bleary vision widens, you pick up the call.

“James? Is everything okay?”

“Could I come over?” Is all he asked, sounding broken.

You answered with an instant yes, quickly changing into a jumper and a hoodie. waiting for him in the living room.

His knocks sounded hesitant, almost as if he were reconsidering his choices.

You’re greeted by a heartbreaking sight.

James Barnes, with his hair a tousled mess, eyes puffy and red. Your heart seizes with worry.

“Natalie and I broke it off. I well, Sam saw her out with Zemo. She did not even deny it. How could she do this to me, Firefly?” He even sounds broken, as your nickname falls from his lips.

He lets you pull him into your warm embrace, his arms wrapping around you, pulling your body close into his. He sighs deeply as he finds comfort. 

The tears do brim anew, his shoulders shake.

“Bucky,” You hesitate, a hand stroking the back of his head. You guide him to the couch, retrieving your stash of ice cream and running back to him.

He gives a half hearted smile seeing the flavour, a shared favourite. 

You give your own beaming grin of encouragement.

“Here is your mission choose you accept it.” You hand him a spoon. He chuckles slightly.

“To finish this entire pint of ice cream with me.” 

The ice cream doesn’t stand a chance.

————————————————–

Bucky has good days and bad ones for three months after the break up, the timing awful between midterms and assignments but they served distraction. 

To celebrate the end of the torturous examinations you both make your way around New York City. In search of 1 am pizza. 

“How are you?” You know it is a question she could dodge but the way he seemed to carry himself slowly coming into his own had given you hope. 

Bucky only stiffens for a moment at the question, progress you deem. 

“Honestly I feel it was a good thing.” He takes a bite; the cheese pulls and he grins in approval. You take a picture of him as he makes a silly face, both laughing now.

“I might not date for a while but I know I will eventually.” He informs of the decision.

“That is good.” You pat his back, taking your own bite as he in turn takes a picture of you pulling a silly face.

Slowly your phone memory is filled with several outings with your now extended group of friends, and several more with Bucky. He returns back to himself after a few months more, after a few okay-ish dates and he finds himself seeking your company.

He grabs a bouquet of your favourite flowers, his legs need no guidance to the familiar path of your home. Bucky stands near the entrance as the doorman, Percy smiles at him with kind eyes.

“She’s gone out.” Percy tells him, therefore Bucky waits, leaning against the wall phone in his hand scrolling through the fresh batch of micro sized comedy he could send to you.

Familiar sounding laughter pulls him in, your bright face greets his view, then your fingers curl around an arm. He follows the touching limbs to see the face of Rumlow. 

You seemed so radiant around the man. Bucky clutches the bouquet tighter as though in an attempt to ground himself or stop his heart from breaking before it could even be given to you. 

Rumlow turns you before you can leave his embrace to go to your apartment. Your laughter carries through to Bucky. He watches, lips pressed into a thin line.

Rumlow pulls you close, whispering something your ear, you bite your lip nodding. 

Bucky could hear his heart cracking over the noise around him, as your lips are upon that man’s own. He turns, walking away still clutching the bouquet. 

Bucky Barnes and you — best friends through college. Maybe that shouldn’t change. 

Bucky nods to himself, his feelings probably arose because of the time spent together and your friendship growing deeper. So he tucks this little crush upon you away, and decides that best friends is what you both are meant to be. 

————————————————–

Seven months after graduation, Natasha nurses your busted lip. Vodka on the table is also for drinking she tells you. It soothes the ache from your broken heart and lip. 

Your phone still unresponsive from the one person you need. How many texts does it take for a best friend to respond?

“I could call him.” Natasha offers as you shake your head. 

“I, my texts should be enough, I left him calls as well.” You explain, “Could, could you ask Steve where is he?” 

Natasha studies your face, she knows you’re hurt over Bucky not responding. Brock Rumlow was the furthest thing from your mind and heart.

“I will,” She promises and your phone rings, your best friend’s face flashing across the screen. 

You take the call knowing the odd time difference between the two of you had her more on edge. 

“Hey,” You greet. 

“Don’t hey me, did you report him?” She all but yells. 

“I don’t want to associate any further—,”

“Bullshit, you absolutely should report that piece of shit unless Barnes has murdered him already, so you cannot call the cops cause then he will be in jail.” She cuts you off. 

“I don’t think he knows yet.” You admit, Natasha looks at you, quietly speaking to Steve and updating him about what occurred. 

“What do you mean? Is he okay? Because Barnes would not let that asshat breathe. Hell I’m taking the next plane out of Melbourne.” Her nails on the keyboard resound.

“No, no, don’t! Just, okay, look Nat patched me up and she also said vodka’s good for the pain as well so I’m fine and he’s, he’s probably busy…” You defend Bucky, once again. 

“Babe, he has been busy awful lot since he started dating that bimbo bitch.” She clicks her tongue, annoyed at the man. 

“Look can we just, drop the whole thing, I, I think I need to sleep, and you need to get to work.” You remind her. 

“Just leave me messages through the day alright and no memes or links coherent language only.” She warns you. 

“Yes alright coherent language only.” You promise. 

Nat comes by with a plate of food, placing it in front with a fork. You stare at the pasta for a minute. 

“I called Steve, he got through, Bucky is out with her…” She trails off.

“Oh, did Steve say anything?” You hesitate to ask, Nat shakes her head. 

“He knows you wouldn’t like her to know so he just made sure Bucky would check his messages.” She gnaws at her bottom lip struggling to say something.

“What?” You look at her. 

“You should really report him, this wasn’t the first time was it?” She states you look down at your hands. 

“No.” You close your eyes at the admission.

“How long have you kept things from us? From Bucky?” She places a gentle hand over your forearm. 

“He, he was very particular, no where where anyone would know. Started two months ago. I tried breaking up after the first time but—,” Your vision blurs, the tears are harder to hold back. 

“Do you want me to take pictures? I know we can file a case, or at least a restraining order…” Natasha tries to coax you to listen to her but you just shake you head.

“I can’t I don’t want more trouble, Nat. It’s over he’s gone. The fight was more about him shifting to L.A. and me not wanting to follow.”

“Are you in love with him still?”

“I never was, I just, I thought I could learn to love him and then he just tried to beat it into me…” You shudder in remembrance. 

Natasha leaves the topic, knowing that it was difficult to walk away even let alone relive the ordeal. 

It is four days later at the scheduled game night that you see Bucky, you don’t greet him.

He furrows his brow when you move away from the living room to the bathroom before he can take a good look at you. 

“Where’s Rumlow?” He questions and the room turns silent. 

“Did you not see her messages?” Steve crosses his arms. 

“What messages?” Bucky retrieves his phone.  

“Barnes, when did you last speak to her?” Nat questions then scoffs as Sharon wraps her arm around his wrist pushing the phone down. 

“A few days ago, why?” He answers, running a hand along Sharon’s arm. 

“Bucky.” She pouts. 

“What is it baby?” He questions, being distracted from the conversation at hand by his girlfriend. 

“Bucky you should go speak to Y/N.” Steve adds with a bit more seriousness. 

“What happened, is she, is Firefly alright?” He looks up in worry.

“Ugh, she always wants your attention.” Sharon whispers loudly, “Does she not have her own boyfriend?” 

“Don’t you have better things to do than cling to Bucky’s arm? Or is your default personality trait whiny girlfriend only?” Natasha uses the same tone as Sharon. 

Sam covers up his laugh with a cough. 

“Bucky.” Sharon whines again then moves away to go to the balcony sniffling and tears welling up. 

“Crocodile tears.” Nat rolls her eyes. 

“Nat.” Bucky gives an exasperated look, chasing behind Sharon to mend things. 

“Steve, please let me punch him.” Nat pleads. 

“You know she doesn’t want us to tell him, how has he not responded after the texts? We all got them.” Steve sighs taking another sip of his beer. 

You return, wiping you eyes, for any stray tears or mascara. 

“Whats got her in pain now?” You ask, a look of disdain taking over. You try not to stretch your lip as the sting from the cut still presents itself. 

“Nat called her whiny.” Sam chuckles. 

“Nat…” You sigh. 

“What, it’s about time we call her out.” She shrugs. 

“How are you holding up?” Sam questions, eyes on your busted lip. 

“Eh, been better will be better soon I guess?” You shrug and wince as the pain in your shoulder blade presents itself. 

“And now she’s making a face at me!” Sharon accuses you and then goes back to the balcony. 

Bucky’s heavy sigh echoes through the room. 

“Firefly, can you not? I know you all don’t like her much but I do okay? Christ some best friend you are,” Bucky turns back to once again console his girlfriend running a hand through his hair in frustration. 

Some best friend?” Your cold tone makes Bucky turn to face you, a quip ready on his exhausted tongue, he doesn’t get to speak because he finally takes in your appearance. 

The bags under your eyes, the redness housed within them, the busted lip you have and the slight wince as you take a deep breath. 

“I’m going to kill him.” Bucky connects the dots in his mind. 

“No need, these were days ago, I needed you and you were not there James.” You accuse, tears brimming once more. 

“I, Steve said to see my texts but I had none from you… Steve why did you not say anything?”

“You could have called me. You, I left you voicemails, crying sobbing, asking for you. For your help. You weren’t there. They didn’t say anything because I wanted to tell you but then again, your time and devotion is pre-booked. Let me know when a slot opens up, I can summarise the whole thing in two minutes, the least I can do as some best friend.” You sneer, walking towards the door in no mood to stay any longer. 

Bucky mechanically follows you, 

“Firefly, I—, I swear I don’t have any messages, I’m not lying!” 

“You could have called!” You accuse.

“I was out—,” Bucky tries to grasp your hand.

“Like I said, I know you’re too busy, for me.” You press the call button several times more waiting for the elevator to come up faster. 

“That is no excuse, I’m so sorry, I just, please stay, we can talk.” His hand reaches to grab your shoulder. A painful sound escapes you and you flinch away from him. 

“Where else did he hurt you?” Bucky’s tone holds no emotion, you look up at his face, the stoic expression masks his feelings but the anger in his blue eyes is reaching its summit. 

Your eyes shift to the elevator when it dings to signal the opening of the doors. 

“You aren’t leaving.” Bucky informs you. 

“I do not want to talk about this.” You tell him, feeling like your heart might break again.

“I do. I need to know what did he do, because he won’t be breathing after I’m done with him.” 

“It doesn’t work that way.” Your eyes shift to Sharon who rolls her eyes at you, then puts on a pout when Bucky turns to look at her. 

“Bucky,” “Not now Sharon.”

Bucky turns back, but you’re inside the elevator. He steps ahead to join you, the doors begin closing his fingertips just graze the border where the sensors would have the automatic doors reopen. 

He’s pulled back by his arm by Sharon, you look down. Heart breaking again, that you can’t even be prioritised by your best friend. He won’t even fight for you.

Bucky catches the quiet sob that escapes past your lips at wrapping itself around his heart squeezing upon it.  

“Do you have any semblance that someone else could have bigger problems that you?” Bucky looks at Sharon, taking his arm out of hers. 

“Baby,” She begins her fake tears again. 

“God, not with this again. Sharon, seriously please.” Bucky groans in frustration. 

“You want to spend all your time with that stupid bitch.” She complains as Bucky turns to press the elevators if he is fast enough he can catch up to you. 

“She’s my best friend. She needs me.” Bucky glares at Sharon. 

“No, she does not she managed to find help elsewhere four days ago, she just wants your attention.”

“What the fuck did you say?” Natasha verbalises the question brewing within Bucky. 

“I-, no I said nothing! Nothing!” The blonde stutters in defence. 

“Oh I’m going to smack this fucking bitch—,” Nat is pulled back by Steve. 

“Did you delete Firefly’s messages and voicemails?” Bucky’s voice is low and cold, almost similar to what yours was towards him. 

“I—, no,” Sharon gulps audibly, sweat breaking across her forehead.

“You have one more chance, did you fucking delete messages my best friend left for me, at a time she needed me?” Bucky’s hands form fists. Sharon had kept asking to take pictures on his phone, then sending herself the ones she liked thats when she must have deleted all of your communication to him. 

“Bucky, it’s always, Firefly this and Firefly that, what about me?” Sharon defends, trying to move close to Bucky. 

The elevator dings, opening on the floor. Bucky crosses the threshold. 

“I’m going to send the elevator back up, I want you out of my life. My house key can be dropped off here at Natasha’s, don’t you dare try to contact me or anyone. It is over.”

Sharon’s final plea falls on deaf ears as the doors are closed and Bucky lets out a heavy sigh. He brings out his phone trying to call you as he jogs through the crowd towards the nearest station, checking the watch he knows the next train leaves in ten minutes. 

Bucky calls out your name through the station, his breathing erratic. You have your hood up, not wanting to be spotted by him. 

You can hear his calls, the way your phone vibrates in your pocket a frantic echo of his own booming voice. 

“Firefly.” Bucky finally breathes, standing behind you. 

You say nothing as you turn to face him. 

“I’m sorry, I really am so sorry, it is no excuse she deleted the messages, fuck, I should have called. I should have been the one there. I’m your best friend. I should have caught on earlier.” He tenderly cups your face between his hands, guilt seeping into his bones. 

His thumbs wipe your tears, you don’t want to have a public meltdown. 

“Come on let’s get you home, I think we still have time to grab ice cream from Mrs. Lorena’s store.” His warm hands leave your face, but the warmth returns on your hands as he intertwines them with his, you want to cry all over again. 

Bucky takes charge of leading you through the night train, you both stand in favour of the elderly couple who need the seats. They look at the two of you warmly. 

You feel small, your hand never leaving his, he stays close with almost a protective stance over you. 

Bucky notes the change in your demeanour. How you’re hiding away, flinching at loud sounds. 

It eats at him how these small things had inculcated themselves into you the past months you were with Rumlow. He didn’t care about the consequences, he will beat the shit out of that fucker. 

Your mind races, back to the night you first went out with Rumlow. Somehow your mind kept comparing what he did to Bucky. As though your tall brunette best friend should be the standard of all men. 

————————————————–

You weren’t going to call Rumlow back, realising that maybe the reason you were comparing him to Bucky was because you were in love with your best friend, your Bucky. 

The conversation was going to be simple, carry a bouquet of his favourite flowers, a letter in your hand filled with your confession. Your nerves singed with each step towards his door. 

You rang the bell, once, twice; then you heard the laughter and kisses. Your heart sunk, you scrambled to hide at the other end of the hallway. 

Bucky came into view with Sharon, the business major. They make their way to his door, lips meeting ever so often, you feel each one deliver a crack to your heart.  

Maybe, maybe you were meant to be best friends only. The door closes and you can hear their sounds, you move past the corridor and exit the building. 

Nodding to yourself, Bucky Barnes and you best friends through college. 

————————————————–

“Firefly?” Bucky waves a hand in front of you, you blink, looking around. 

“Huh?” You speak before realising. 

“I asked where is your key ring?” Bucky looks at you in worry. 

“Oh um,” You fish around for the familiar keyring handing it to him.

Bucky opens the door at sets down the bag of groceries. How long did you space out for?

“So, here is your mission, should you choose to accept it,” He brings out your favourite ice cream tub from the bag.

Your face breaks out into a grin, a laugh finally reverberating in your chest rather than sobs. 

“Is it to eat this ice cream and talk to your idiot best friend.” Bucky holds up two spoons as an offer. 

You grab one, then grab the tub and make a run for the living room couch. 

“Oh no you don’t!” Bucky chases after you, you twist around the last minute your foot and his tangling with the fluffy carpet under the coffee table, you both land on the couch. 

Bucky is above you as your foreheads collide and the tub of ice cream rolls onto the floor. 

“Are you okay?” He questions, as you rub your forehead and his, the ache dies down slightly of the impact. 

“Sort of,” You wince, then look at him. 

The two of you lock gazes, heat blooms between you both. Red tinged cheeks. 

Bucky had wondered how it would be, to hold you this close. 

You had wondered how it would be, to have him in your arms.  

Both of you break out of your thoughts and scramble to sit up. Ankles still caught in the carpet, you both slide down the couch, ending with your straddling his hips. 

His hands move to your hips and yours wrap around his neck. 

Bucky feels your warm breath fan across his face, how is it you fit so well against him, as though you belong next to him. 

You feel his fingers gently squeeze your hips, how is it that your arms encircle him as though he belongs between them, next to you. 

You feel something poke your thigh. Bucky’s eyes widen. 

“Um, is is that…” 

“No um, no,” 

Bucky panics at your suggestion quickly moving you from his lap to beside him on the floor. 

The spoons clatter to the floor between his legs. 

The sigh that leaves from Bucky’s lips has you laugh, he joins in. Shoulders shaking and heads thrown back in mirth. 

Your head on his shoulder and his resting on of top yours. 

Laughter and giggles filling the apartment after months. 

————————————————–

It is another month later when you all are at your weekly game night at Bucky and Steve’s place. 

“Barnes, who are you taking to the wedding then?” Sam questions between shuffling the deck of Uno Cards. 

“What wedding?” You curiously look up Bucky sighs, shoulders deflating. 

“Maya is getting married, and insisted I bring someone along, and well they wanted to meet my girlfriend but I’ve broken up.” He explains, placing a chip in his mouth. 

“So just tell them?” You quirk an eyebrow. 

“You remember Maya right?” He looks at you with an incredulous gaze. 

“And Mr. Barnes here hasn’t told her, he’s broken up. Wanted to show off the whiney girl.” Sam announces. 

“Winnie Barnes would not approve.” Steve adds quietly and Bucky groans. 

Nat gives you a look before looking down into her phone. You blink a few times not understanding what that look meant. 

Your phone chimes, your eyebrows furrow at the message. 

Best Friend: go as his fake date to the wedding, his family adores you. 

Me: who even told you? 

Best Friend: not important. 

You look up with a glare at Natasha. 

Best Friend: don’t glare at her. She’s an innocent baby.

Me: I’m not doing the fake date thing. Not with Bucky, it will be hard. 

Best Friend: come on, he looks at you the same way. 

Me:he doesn’t. and also bye. i’m not having this conversation again. 

You place your phone back, looking up at the four of them staring at you. 

“What?” You question, picking up your seven cards. 

“Do you have any solution for Bucky?” Steve wonders, you look at Nat, she shrugs innocently. 

You narrow your eyes at her. 

“Let me think.” You bide your time. Bucky inhales deeply, seeing his own set of cards. 

Your phone chimes again, you control the groan that whats to leave you.

Best Friend: listen, just trust me okay? When have I said something that turned to shit? 

Me: its only twice your plans have not turned to shit.

Best Friend: ouch. this won’t turn to shit come on, help him out. I’ll ask Nat to let you win. 

Me: as if I need to be let to win.

Best Friend: she has 4 draw fours. 

Me: what the fuck?

You look up and Nat discreetly shows you proof. 

“Say the word and you get them.” Nat whispers. 

More encouragement comes through from your best friend. 

“What if, Bucky, you take a fake date…” You clear your throat. 

“Maya will catch on its a fake date and then it will be a mess, I just will fake a work thing.”

“What if I go? As your um fake date?” You offer, placing your cards face down near the space between you and Nat. 

“Are you sure? I mean they may believe it…” Bucky trails off in thought. 

“I mean, only if you’re comfortable… Just Maya will be upset if you don’t go at all and not having a date should not stop you—,”

“No, I think it should work, we know each other well enough to pretend to be in love.” Bucky grins. 

You try not to wince, “Yup, yeah, won’t be hard to pretend.” You agree. 

“Thank you, Firefly.” Bucky beams for the remainder of the game even as you beat his ass with your exchanged cards. 

————————————————–

BestFriend: so who wants to bet on they return as an official couple? I place a 100 bucks. 

Natasha: add my 100 to that

Sam: nah man they’re too scared to admit it. 

Steve: they won’t damage the friendship. 

Best Friend: Oh lil Samuel and lil Steve ya’ll better be ready to pay up. 

————————————————–

You grasp the handle of your suitcase a little tighter as Bucky’s car pulls around the corner. You walk closer to the edge where he could park for a few moments as you would load up your things. 

Bucky set the car into park stepping out and greeting you with a wide smile. You return the gesture, he envelopes you into one of his warm hugs. Easing your nerves. 

“Here give it to me and you can hang the dress near the suit.” Bucky takes your small suitcase and you open the backseat door his navy suit hanging from the hook, you place your own dress near it. Checking for any folds and then getting into the front seat with him. 

“So um,” He says after a few moments of silence. 

“Yeah?” You look at him, he seems nervous. 

“We need to get our stories straight…” He hints you nod.

“When did we start dating, first date, who asked who?” You list, he nods. 

“Guess watching those rom-coms proved to be useful.” He chuckles, you swat his arm lightly. 

“Okay so we sort of confessed a few months ago, but we were scared to ruin the friendship.” He offers, which in a sense was true for him, though he never confessed. Even though he had fallen for you. 

“Yes and we decided to date other people, but those didn’t work out so we decided to give it a shot cause the feelings never went away.” Which was true you think, at the back of your mind you were in love with him. 

“Okay, yes so we’re dating since a month and a half…” He offers, you hum in agreement. 

“Yep and first date…” you pause to think.

“Ice cream parlour.” He offers, you smile that was actually your first outing as friends. 

“Yeah, and you had the cherry stuck to your nose with whipped cream.” You begin to laugh. 

“Oh right miss, whipped cream moustache.” He gives you a look, chuckling as well. 

“Oh right, you looked like a clown.” You roll your eyes. 

“And you were my sidekick.” Bucky teases. 

“Alright, alright, and we both confessed, got each other flowers and stuff.” You admit, you had put the flower in resin. 

Bucky grips the wheel, he had gotten one flower’s petals from the bouquet preserved. 

“Yeah, that, that sounds romantic enough.” He clears his throat. The earlier tension seeping back into him, was this a mistake? What if he said something stupid. 

“Hey, um, Buck?” Your hand rests on his shoulder. 

He looks at you at the stop sign. 

“If, if at any point you feel the whole faking thing gets too much lets you know keep a safe word and we’ll you know revert to being best friends and try to exit that situation okay?” You offer. 

“You’re perfect you know? I was nervous what if it gets too much for either of us and this yeah the safe word is sensible.” He agrees. 

“So whats our safe word?” You question. 

“Draw-four.” His mouth twists as though he can taste the loss against your multiple draw fours that you saved just for him at the one on one game. 

You can’t help but laugh, “Okay, draw-four it is.” 

Bucky shakes his head, shifting the gear as the green light comes into view. 

“Also, Firefly, I want you to be comfortable I know what the fucker did might linger or come back at random moments, I know you’re doing well with therapy but if it gets too much or if anything triggers you, please tell me. I will get you out of that situation or help you as you need okay?” He says, you feel your chest constrict at the intensity of him caring about you.

“I will, Bucky, I promise.” You give his hand a squeeze oer the gearshift. 

————————————————–

The two hour journey to the venue has you both slightly tired, mostly hungry. The rehearsal dinner was the event you both had to dress up first for, as you both enter the venue. 

A squeal has you both turn. 

“Maya.” Bucky grins opening his arms for his cousin to come crashing into him. 

“I thought you were going to ditch my wedding.” She complains but then bounces excited, “Now introduce me to your date!” her eyes turn to you, widening. 

You offer a smile your congratulations to her caught in your throat as she screams excitedly once again. 

“Oh my god, I knew it! I knew this would be best friends to lovers! James you did good! Wait till I tell Aunt Winnie and Becca!” Maya cheers pulling you into a hug. You hug back and Bucky scratches the back of his neck giving you a nervous look. 

Maybe it would not be hard to convince them that you both were in love he thinks…. The only problem was how does he convince himself not to blabber to you. 

You feel Maya’s excitement seep into you as well when she pulls away, jumping slightly. 

“Congratulations!” You cheer. 

“Girl, you have to tell me how did you both realise.” She raises a finger up in warning. 

“I will, I will.” You give a promise to the bride. 

“What is all this commotion?” Winnie Barnes steps out of the room that Maya was in, her smile widening as she spots her son. 

You admire them as they hug after months of staying apart. 

Winnie pulls away from the hug, running a hand over Bucky’s hair and then cupping his jaw. 

“Ma, don’t cry you saw me yesterday on video-call.” Bucky wipes her tears. 

“Not the same,” She pats his head, placing a kiss on his forehead.

“I love you.” He engulfs her in a hug again. 

“I love you too, sunshine.” She smiles warmly. 

“Now where is this mystery date of yours, hiding things from your Ma,” She gives him a small glare, Bucky widens his eyes. He scrambles to turn and his hand is outstretched towards you, you intertwine your fingers with his, stepping next to him. 

“Bucky, you better not be lying.” She looks between the two of you, his grip tightens on your hand.

“We’re not, Mrs. Barnes—,”

“Sweetheart, Winnie for you always.” His mom corrects you, a warm smile. 

She cups your cheek as well. 

“So he finally came to his senses.” She teases. 

“We both did…” You add with a smile, looking up at Bucky, admiring him. 

Bucky looks down at you, your gazes transfixed upon each-other his blue eyes inviting. 

Bucky wants to be lost in your eyes, drowning in their deepness. Submerging himself in the affection that they currently hold for him. 

A flash has you both turn and shake your heads. 

“I need one for the album.” Maya reasons and Bucky sighs. 

“Send me a copy?” You offer trying to dissipate the tension. 

“Why don’t you both settle into your room? And no funny business.” Winnie warns, you both pale. 

“Ma, I would, no—,” Bucky stutters, a blush coating his cheeks. 

Winnie looks at you, before laughing. 

“He better be treating you right, sweetheart, if not just tell me. I’ll sort him out.” She gives him a warning look. 

Then Winnie cups your cheek, “I am so happy you’re with him.” She says earnest. 

Guilt gnaws at you, Winnie probably would be heartbroken if she knew you both were lying through your teeth. 

“Sir, Ma’am, your room is ready, we’ll have the luggage delivered to your room in the next ten minutes.” The receptionist hands you the keycards. 

“Well go freshen up I’ll see you both at seven-thirty for the rehearsal dinner.” 

With a final hug to Winnie and Maya both of you sauntered into your room. Bucky looks at the bed. The only bed. 

“Um, I’ll take the sofa.” He offers. 

“Bucky that sofa is not even going to fit your legs…” You inform him. 

“We’ll just make a wall of pillows?” You offer.

“Are you sure?” His mind wanders to the night you were in his arms, straddling his lap. 

He coughs to remind himself; not to let his mind wander astray. 

You nod, at what you don’t know, it’s not like you both haven’t cuddled or been in each other’s physical space before. Road trips you both pretty much sat next to each other fell asleep listening to songs so why was this different? 

“Is it cool if I shower first?” Bucky turns to the bathroom, “Oh fuck me.” He mutters. 

“What?” You follow his line of vision. 

What kind of hotel was this? 

The wall between the bathroom and bedroom wasn’t opaque it was a glass, a very transparent glass. The door was made on frosted glass, but again you would be able to understand what was going on. 

You gulp audibly. 

Bucky opens the door to check if there is a curtain or towel to cover the pane. 

The bathroom proves to be larger, inside, the toilet seat away from the view only the glass shower and bathtub can be perceived from the glass. 

You peek from the glass as Bucky rests his hands on his hips as he looks around for a solution. 

“Shower with swimsuits?” He offers an idea. 

“Bucky I didn’t carry one…” You scratch the back of your neck, suddenly everything feels incredibly warm.

“Underwear then…” 

“How about we just shower while the other one faces away? Or lays in bed…” you counter. 

It seems plausible, Bucky purses his lips, then nods. 

“So um, you lay down, stretch your feet out and I’ll um, shower first then I’ll lay down…” He runs a hand through his hair and then over his stubble. 

You nod, grabbing your phone and turning to the bed. 

Bucky grabs his toiletries and powers through going to the very open bathroom. Maybe the hot water will fog up the glass? 

You immediately text your best friend and Natasha about the one bed and very daunting bathroom situation but they just send stupid laughing emojis in response. 

You groan. 

Some friends they are, the shower runs and from your angle on the bed you can’t see a thing apart from the ceiling of the bathroom, you sigh. 

It would just be easier to admit to Bucky you have feelings for him. You can’t risk your friendship though. 

Bucky sighs in content as the droplets hit his skin. The warm water taking away the stress of the day and tenseness in his shoulders. He watches the rivulets trail from his body to the anti skid flooring. One hand on the wall. 

His mind briefly wonders what would it be like to have his ex here and then he dismisses the thought. Sharon and he were supposed to be a one off a distraction from his growing feelings for you. 

Then she got clingy, demanding every waking minute of his to be hers to fill with herself and her own needs and wants. 

Bucky sighs again, the suds of soap now turning clear. He grabs the towel, checking the glass sure enough it is fogged up by the heat. 

He puts on his boxers and jeans as he exits and your voice catches in your throat as a lone rivulet makes its was down his neck then chest then abdomen, ending just over the taut band of muscles and you feel as though the world is in slow motion. 

“Take a picture it will last longer.” Bucky teases bringing you out of your staring. 

“I h-hope you didn’t use up all t-the hot water.” You stutter get up grabbing your set of things from your bag. 

The outfit for tonight was a simple purple jumpsuit that brought out your curves, and chest. Long sleeves but very comfortable. 

Bucky lays down, texting Sam and Steve finally about what was happening. They both offered him advice on avoiding the shared bed but then the picture of the couch he sent had them agree with your pillow wall idea. 

As the shower runs he feels himself grow less confident in his plan to have you both pretending, he was so sure he’d slip up. 

When you exit Bucky’s lips part the deep purple of the jumpsuit bringing out the colour of your skin and eyes. The neckline of the outfit was probably his favourite, it was low, and accentuated your chest as the sleeves were the ones that had slits on them. 

It showed skin but in a way that was risqué but classy. 

The fabric hugged the curve of your hips and Bucky wanted to pull you close to him just so he could feel your warmth. 

“Take a picture it will last longer.” You tease him and he shakes his head, observing you do your make up. He’d seen it before the way your tongue would poke out in concentration as you picked which eyeshadow to use or if the colours were going well with what you were wearing. 

You turn to him once you’re done, 

“Can you see if these are even?” You sit next to him on the bed closing your eyes. 

Bucky’s eyes are on your lips and not eyelids. He traces their outline with his gaze, appearing so soft and so inviting. 

“Bucky? Is the eyeliner equal?” You open your eyes as he looks up at your confused expression. 

“Yes, um w-was just ma-making sure they were equal…” He stammers out quickly getting up and to further aid drying his hair. He was growing it out again. 

The two of you make it downstairs, Bucky’s arm slips around your waist before you enter. Pulling you close to his warmth. You smile up at him. 

“You look beautiful.” He admits looking down at you with a smile that sends flutters through your stomach. 

“You look quite handsome yourself.” You offer him an equally butterfly inducing smile. 

Bucky knows his heart will break this weekend but if he gets to pretend to be yours then its worth it. 

You look up at Bucky stealing a final glance before walking through the door. You suddenly realise that maybe, maybe basking in this pretend would at-least give you a taste of happiness, even if the magic would end come Monday morning. 

As the two of you find your seating next to Rebecca, who also is elated at you being the secret girlfriend. The dinner begins to go by without a hitch. 

Emotional words are said in the practice speeches and the love between Maya and her to be husband, Marcus; is felt through all the attendees, tying them all together. 

Bucky has his arm around the back of your chair, as you all wait for dessert. He doesn’t realise it when he begins to trace soft patters along your mid back. You lean into his comforting touch, allowing him to continue. 

When you look up at him, your breath hitches at how intently he looks at you. Those azure eyes taking in every bit of your own eyes. 

“Oh come on, just kiss already.” Rebecca’s voice stops the patterns being drawn upon you. 

“W-what?” You look at her in confusion. 

“You both look like you want to tear into each other.” She rolls her eyes, “Just kiss we’re all adults. Well except the kids table in the corner but,” Rebecca shrugs. 

Bucky leans in deciding to kiss your cheek just to shut his sister’s mouth. You then turn to face him just when his lips were to brush you cheek. 

His soft, slightly chapped lips brush over yours, his eyes widen for a moment. Then he closes them, his hand cups your jaw. You feel that damned fluttering feeling again, as you kiss him back. Your palm resting on his chest. His heart thundering wildly against his chest.  

The kiss lasts for a few moments, that feel as though time was slowed down, all too soon you pull away from him. Biting your own bottom lip and a deep blush creeping across your chest and neck. 

“What did you just start dating?” Rebecca comments, “That looked like a middle schooler’s kiss.” 

Bucky tries to make sense, you try to make sense as well. Because what the fuck, you both just kissed each other. 

“We aren’t into PDA.” You defend with a sip of your drink to soothe the nerves. 

Your hand rests on Bucky’s knee, a grounding action that the two of you needed. 

Back, in the room; he begins to undo his shirt, he’s halfway done when he pauses. 

“Firefly?” 

You turn to face him, the make up from your face gone. 

“Bucky?” 

“Was, was the kiss okay?” He fidgets with the cufflink as he undoes it. 

“I um, guess yeah? Why?” You bring your eyes back up to his, 

“No, no, um Rebecca’s comment just well, what if we don’t appear that comfortable?”

“Do we practice kissing?” You wonder, god just dig a six feet deep hole and bury yourself in it. 

“I, thats not, I’m not—,” He lets out a frustrated sigh, closing the space between you two. 

Your ears begin a ringing at the way his cologne floods your senses. 

Bucky’s warm hands cup your cheeks,

“I’m not, not trying to take advantage of this but um, maybe we could table kissing? Because I guess handholding and all of the other things we’ve done as, as best friends, so…”

“Yeah no um, yeah I get what you’re saying,” you agree. 

“No kissing then.”

“Nope, no kissing.” 

With the rule established you both wind down for the night the pillow wall is built and the covers are pulled over your frames. 

Exhaustion tugs at your body but sleep seems to be at its wits end not wanting to arrive to you. 

Bucky shifts around in bed, staring at the pillow wall. That should not have been the first kiss between the two of you. 

His mind is running a mile a minute, he wonders if you’ve fallen asleep. 

“Bucky, you awake?” Your soft whisper has him tug one pillow away. 

“Hey,” His soft smile greets you with his hair tousled and eyes craving sleep. 

“Hey,” you smile back, your eyes on the verge of sleep, a few strands of your hair curling around your forehead. 

“Can’t sleep?” He wonders and you nod. 

“You too?” You ask and he nods. 

“Do you want to talk till we fall asleep?” You offer as a plan. 

“Sounds like a plan.” Bucky’s heart feels warm. 

It is quiet for a moment before Bucky decides to tell you about his promotion at work. It’s hardly been time at the firm but they recognise his potential. 

You reach across the wall and hug him, Bucky grins and wraps his arms around you, relishing the moment. 

“Thats great! I’m so proud of you!” You cheer him on, he grins. You both slowly pull away from the hug. Returning to your respective sides. 

The conversation flows from there, about what his new responsibilities would be and how he would have to divide his time. Both sets of eyelids get heavy and Bucky dozes off mid conversation, you chuckle lightly. Brushing his hair back and then slumber find you as well. With your hand resting on his cheek.

————————————————–

It’s very warm for the cooler spring day that was predicted. 

Bucky is usually feeling like a furnace but today he is exceptionally warm as well. Not that he is complaining but something about the warmth is inviting. 

A soft whimper presents itself to Bucky and his eyes peel open. You’re pressed against flush him, his head was buried in the crook of your neck, an arm around your waist. Your arm resting above his own. 

“Firefly…” He tries to coax you out of slumber. 

“Five more minutes…” You mutter sleepily, shifting around till you face him and your head rests on his chest. How do you have a death grip on him to not let him escape he doesn’t understand. 

“Firefly… we gotta get to breakfast…” Bucky manages to free his hand and brushes his thumb over your cheek bone. 

Honestly he wouldn’t leave the bed if he woke up to you everyday. 

“Shhh, the dough is resting.” You grumble, shifting closer.

“The dough?” Bucky grins amused. 

“I’m the dough, must rest in the oven.” You complain again. 

“I thought you’re my Firefly.” Oh he’s going to ask you about this. 

“I can be two things.” You pull away looking at him. 

Bucky looks at you, waiting for the sleepiness to leave you. 

“Bucky?” You ask, then look down at your intertwined bodies, well you clinging onto him

“Firefly, good morning.” He chuckles and then you move away from him all too soon. 

“Why didn’t you wake me earlier?!” You sit up on your side, face hidden in your hands. 

“Because the dough needed to rest.” He says matter of factly

“What dough?” You question, then it hits you the drunken analogy you had come up with your best friend and Nat, 

“Oh that no, um, i’m, i’m going to the bathroom.” 

You grab your phone and things as quickly as possible, Bucky remains laying in bed you know he’s still laughing, the endearment is clear in his demeanour but you have half a mind you’re going to be called dough from now on till you spill the reason.

Me: i sleepily blabbed to him about resting the dough.

Best Friend: you know this is why I too up night classes here, to stay awake for the fresh batch of well rested dough stories. 

Nat: So how was the resting of the dough on the very hot oven?

Me: i hate you both. It was a drunken analogy about Bucky being warm.

Best Friend: that made you want to be dough resting in the oven. 

Nat: so when will you get to baking? Now that you have rested. 

Best Friend: oh I think very soon, Bucky’s probably stiffly up to the right temperature. 

Me: i will smack you both. stop it. 

You groan silently. Keeping your phone on the counter. Useless, your friends are useless comedians at your expense. 

Breakfast passes by in the hotel as an uneventful affair, Bucky and you decided that meal times without family intervention would be on best friend mode so the conversation was mutual topics and trying to see if you could squeeze in a marathon of harry potter movies to commemorate the time you did the same in college a year ago. 

The ceremony is at five which gives you a few hours to kill before absolutely needing to get ready. 

“Do you think we should ask your mum or Maya if she needs any help? It just feels weird being just a guest…” 

Bucky’s hair is falling upon his forehead when he looks up at you. Unthinkingly you reach over to help move it, and for a moment he wants to just have your fingertips run through his hair as he lays next to you. 

“I, yes, we should.” He wonders if you can hear his heart beating almost as if it will leap out of his chest. 

And you both find yourselves barely making it in time to get changed for the ceremony. Bucky takes over ironing duty since he knows your absolutely need to wash your hair before an event otherwise you don’t feel yourself. 

In the nick of time you make it, Bucky eternally grateful you had his cufflinks set up and he helps you zip up the dress. 

You both are panting by the time you reach the attached ballroom. With just two minutes till the bridal march. The wedding planner shoos you both off with a glare as if Bucky and you never helped set the decor because five people of her team fell ill. 

“Shouldn’t have fixed that centrepiece.” You grumble as Bucky snickers before you settle into the seats. 

“Firefly, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t have left it unfixed.” He whispers leaning in, 

“I would.” You whisper back. 

“You’re too nice.” 

“I’ll break it. Let the reception begin.” You warn him. 

He wraps his arm around your shoulder bringing you close. 

“I think the dough needs some rest.” He teases. 

“James.” You warn, the redness of your cheeks only urging him onward. 

“Sorry dough, won’t bother you.” Bucky says, giving you puppy eyes. 

“James—,” Your voice caught in your throat at his proximity. He licks his lips, eyes on your soft ones. You’re wearing that red lipstick from the brand you frequently stayed up at night to order from, and he could lie and say the shade does nothing for you because your lips seem so inviting the shade of red adding to your allure. 

If you ask him for his heart he’d give it to you right there, he’d get on his knees and beg you to have it. 

The bridal march breaks his reverie and both of you stand up with the crowd as Maya walks down the aisle with her father, looking every bit of an angel in her wedding gown. 

When you look at her fiancé, your heart lurches, he’s crying tears of joy watching her close the final bit of distance between them and their forever. 

As her father gives her hand in her to be husband, the intimate look of hidden smiles they share almost has you look away. 

Bucky watches the ceremony play out, Maya and Marcus have to say their vows now and he knows they were best friends before Maya admitted her feelings and they have been together four years before they got engaged. 

“I believe the couple have prepared their own vows.” The minister gestures and Marcus’  best man hands him his folded papers. 

“Maya, I met you in high school and you were instantly my best friend.” Marcus begins. 

“We made a list of promises of what we would do and a set of friendship rules, you may not remember but I still have those pieces of decorated cardboard.”

Maya laughs, recalling the memory. 

You look up at Bucky, recalling the moment from where you both turned into each other’s best friends. 

“The first time as best friends when we had an argument was over where would we go to for college, because in all honesty you and I can only function if we’re close enough to share our one braincell.”

Their entire bridal party laughs at the joke. 

You recall the time you were paired with him to play Charades and the two of you sucked so horribly that the entire group banned the game.

“That day I was so angry but when I went back home I saw those cardboards. I knew college could be done anywhere but my best friend? I couldn’t leave her. That is the best damn decision, I made, well that and proposing to you and today standing in front of you, vowing to be by your side, even when you hate me leaving my clothes scattered on the floor, loving you even when I may be annoyed at you for not being able to pick a place for dinner,” 

Maya lightly swats him, then wipes a tear. 

You stare at Bucky catching the smile on his face, you wonder what he thinks about, then you feel him about to look at you so you look ahead. 

“To cherish you even when things around us may push and shove us to not remember what we’re together for, to nourish and nurture our love, our life, 

to work on myself to be the best I can be for you. To support you in everything you need me to support you, to catch you if you stumble, to be held by you if I tumble. I vow to be your best friend, love and husband as long as time is ours.” Marcus gazes lovingly at his bride. 

Bucky tears his eyes away when he hears your sniffle. You wipe your tears with the back of your hand. His hand shifts to wipe your tears and to hold you closer. Press his lips to your temple in promise. 

“Marcus, how am I supposed to speak now?” Maya complains with a chuckle that masks a small sob. 

Her groom shrugs innocently making all the teary eyed faces laugh. 

“My Marcus, the day you entered my life, was the most ordinary day I thought but little did I know your doodle of a covalent bond in my notebook would be setting up the reaction for an extraordinary life ahead where I get to stand at the altar with you.” Maya looks up at him, Marcus smiles at her, eyes getting watery. 

“When I admitted my feelings to you, I was scared to lose you. So scared that I was going to hold my silence. Then you brought those damn sliders from the place we went to as best friends and I knew I had to tell you how much more love my heart held for you.”

Buck looks down at you, every memory with you playing in his mind, taking in Maya’s words and replacing them with moments he has with his Firefly. 

“I vow to not nag you for your clothes strewn across the floor.” 

Bucky adores you as you laugh. Then looks back at the bride and groom. 

“I vow to be brave when you need me to for myself and for you. I vow to let my fears show so you can be brave for me and yourself. I vow to cherish you for who you are and who you become. To nourish and nurture our love, our life. To work on myself for being the one you need through any stage of life we are at; to be your best friend, love and wife as long as time is ours.” 

You gaze up at Bucky when his hand moves in your periphery, you catch the redness of his cheeks, he cried as well. Your hands ache to offer comfort.

Bucky gazes at you, both of your visions blurry from the tears. 

“Beautiful words, now I ask you, Marcus Finnegan, do you take Maya Barnes as your lawfully wedded wife?” The minister questions Marcus.

He places the wedding band on her finger.

Bucky grasps your hand in his, fingers curling around the space between yours. You look from the half intertwined hands to Bucky questioningly.

He isn’t going to let you go, no. 

If he had gotten to you first that night, maybe if he was brave enough he could have prevented the heartbreak.

“Now I ask you, Maya Barnes, do you take Marcus Finnegan as your lawfully wedded husband?” The minister questions Maya.

She places the wedding band on his finger.

You curl your fingers around his hand, letting tears flow down your cheeks. You hope with all your heart you’re interpreting his gesture correctly. If only you had gotten to him first that night.

“I present to you family and friends, by the power vested in me, Mr. and Mrs. Barnes-Finnegan. You may now kiss the bride.” 

The cheers and clapping around the ballroom die down into a dull buzz, Bucky cups your cheek with his left hand, pulling your lips onto his own. The kiss filled with a longing and hunger that you both carried for months. Salt mixes with the taste of his lips. Fears slowly let gone off as you grasp his left hand that rests upon your cheek.

When the two of you pull away for air, hidden by everyone standing to keep clapping for the newly weds allowing you both to be tucked away in your little corner.

“Why didn’t we say anything?” Bucky laughs through the tears.

“I was scared to lose you.” You rest your forehead against his, Bucky wipes your tears as you wipe away his own.

“Firefly, I’m never letting you go. Should have walked upto you and that fucker.” He finally admits, confessing his entire plan to you.

“I kept thinking of doing the same when you were with her, showed up with your favourite flowers too. Have it preserved back home…” 

“I’ve kept it preserved too.” Bucky admits, joy ceases his heart at your elation.

Your lips meet again, this time with lesser longing than before but the need to have each other ever present. Bucky’s lips peppered kisses all over your face, drawing out laughter from you. 

Each mirthful moment tucked away for him to keep. 

Your head resting on his chest as his arms around your waist, the slow notes of the song cascade around the two of you, Bucky had you on the dance floor from the first song, dinner left for later. 

You tilt your head back looking up at him with so much adoration.

“Waited so long to have you look at me this way.” He admits.

“Always looked at you this way when you weren’t looking.” You confess.

“Never looking away from your gorgeous eyes, Firefly.” He promises, his lips ghost over yours, as you rise on your tip toes even with heels to kiss your Bucky.

He finally got to you. You finally got to him.

—x—

frostironfudge:

Could I Find Homeland In You? (Peter Parker One Shot)

Summary: based on the following nonnie’s lovely prompt - Can you do a TASM!Peter x fem!reader prompt where they are childhood besties but Peter kinda starts crushing on Gwen but then after he approaches her she turns him down and the reader comforts him until he finally realizes he loves her? Kinda gets angsty when Peter tells her about Gwen bc she has also had feelings for him since forever but refuses to acknowledge them. Best friends to lovers kinda trope… loads of fluff?

hope you enjoy this my sweet nonnie <3

Pairings: TASM!Peter Parker x Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, italicised words between dividers are past moments between peter and the reader. This is non canon compliant. Peter, Reader and Gwen are in university.

Word Count: 5046

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Masterlist//My AO3

———————–

Don’t look at them, don’t look at them. You chant to yourself, but your eyes do fixate, on his warm grin, bright brown eyes full of mirth. Then you gaze at the person making him laugh, Gwen.

Your heart sinks, you look back down at your notebook, ideas messily strewn across the pages. Lines crossed by ink but not you.

It isn’t that you dislike her, she is a really great person, you admire her work and she is always sweet to you.

It’s just Peter parker is completely taken by her, he hasn’t told you, his childhood best friend yet about how he feels but you can see it as clear as day. Peter blushing when he speaks to Gwen or about her, longingly looking at her when she walks past the two of you.

He doesn’t need to tell you what you already know.

You just wish he would look at you that way.

Because you look at him that way but he never finds your eyes.

“Do you want to continue this later? I’m kind of tired.” You ask the remaining members of the chemistry group project, your mood souring as Peter shifts closer to Gwen, reading the contents on her laptop over her shoulder. her temple resting against his jaw.

Your mind flashes to last week when the two of you were watching the latest episode of Dynasty, that was how you both were, cuddled up the laptop resting on the makeshift pillow stand.

You shake out of the memory looking at your group,

“Yeah.” They agree, you grab your scarce materials, shuffling out the door of the open area, it reverberates a clang upon shutting.

Peter looks up after a while, from the yearbook spread on Gwen’s screen, eyes scanning the area. His eyebrows furrow noticing your absence.

Keep reading

frostironfudge:

Sparkle - Bucky Barnes (one shot)

Summary:this is my entry for @pellucid-constellations ’s #loveletterswritingchallenge i sincerely enjoyed writing this, it was so much of fun to come up with a story that left me all fuzzy and happy.

Pairing:bestfriend!bucky x plus size female!reader (set in an AU)

Characters: Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Sharon Carter, Brock Rumlow, Natasha Romanoff, Winnie Barnes, Rebecca Barnes

Warnings: fluff, angst, recount of bullying comments experienced by the reader, mentions of fatphobic comments, fluff, mentions of anxiety attacks, swearing, mutual pining, no smut, sam and natasha have the braincell in the two friendships. please note if any of this triggers you please do not read. you are responsible for the media you consume.

A.N: this is my first time writing a plus sized reader, being plus sized i’ve always wanted to explore writing for a reader who looks like me, i hope i’ve done well, if not i will strive to improve my writing so please be kind, thank you. that being said, i am immensely proud of what i have written.

Word Count:8432

dividers are by the lovely @firefly-graphics

masterlist//Ao3

seven.

‘dear y/n,

your sparkle pens are really pretty

i will share my new crayons if you share your sparkle pens.

-bucky’

‘dear bucky,

i want the blue crayon, you pick a sparkle colour, i will share it with you

-y/n’

‘dear sparkle,

i want the purple sparkle, because its your favourite, i wanna be your favourite too.

-bucky’

‘dear bucky,

you are my favourite.

and you can have the purple sparkle.

-sparkle’

‘dear sparkle,

i think we are going to be best friends.

-bucky’

‘dear bucky,

i think so too.

-sparkle’

Fifteen.

“what do you mean you are moving away?” You ask, confusion laces through your features.

“It means I have to go to a new city, my dad got a new job, they gave him a fancy house. Sparkle I don’t want to move.” Bucky is looking sullen, his blue eyes hold a sadness that is slowly seeping into his heart with every minute that passes.

It is slowly sinking in what is going to happen, he has go leave everything here, his childhood home, the mini play house at the backyard, this swing set you both have been sitting on since time began, and you.

Keep reading

OKAY I AM SERIOUSLY SO EMOTIONAL RN THIS HIT ME RIGHT IN THE FEELS

frostironfudge:

Masterlist

Philtre -  Loki Laufeyson

It Comes Back To Me - Bucky Barnes

*Part 2 of It Comes Back To Me - Bucky Barnes

Your Boyfriend Comes To Work Day - Tom Hiddleston (requested)

Library-Hogwarts AU-LokiLaufeyson - (Smut)

Room of Requirement-Hogwarts AU-LokiLaufeyson - (Smut)

Venus - Bucky Barnes (Bodyguard Bucky) (Smut)

Conversations with The Devil - Bucky Barnes (Smut) [Submission for Spooktacular Smutfest 21 by boxofbonesfic]

  • Fanfics:

Rush - Tom Hiddleston x fem!reader

(18+ themes)

Chapter 1,Chapter 2,Chapter 3,Chapter 4,Chapter 5,Chapter 6,Chapter 7,Chapter 8,Chapter 9,Chapter 10,Chapter 11,Chapter 12,Chapter 13 (contains smut), Chapter 14,Chapter 15,Chapter 16,Chapter 17,Chapter 18,Chapter 19 (contains smut)

Auroras (WIP) - Loki x Tony Stark x fem!reader - Soulmate AU

  • Headcanons:

Age Gap-Tom Hiddleston (requested)

Co-Stars on Betrayal -Tom Hiddleston (requested)

First Christmas with Loki -Loki Laufeyson (requested)

loading