#just bpd thoughts

I genuinely never believed I would ever enjoy a big loud party with a bunch of people dancing in close quarters but I’ve apparently come far enough that I was willing to be one of those people last night and have a fantastic time, and I’m so proud of myself for how far I’ve come

Self care? Taking extra care of myself during weeks that are particularly stressful? Myth

Resolving trauma? In MY 2019? Holy fuck

yikes, having actual connections with and being emotionally open and vulnerable around another human being is a wild trip

I am one more fucking tragedy away from completely snapping,

Really hate that i need constant validation from my friends in order to have any kind of social life lmao, like I’ll be in my feelings and suddenly get intensely paranoid that my friends don’t give a shit abt me and I have to out of the blue be like “hey man you.. you still like me right” because if I don’t I start splitting and end up pushing them away. And it feels like the single most pathetic bullshit in the world, wow,