I can’t remember the last time I felt this alone

I’m getting bad again. And unlike every other time, when I’ve sought out help,

This time I’m just letting it infest me.

I want to lose weight. No matter what. I want to feel numb, because I have been stuck in a rut of feeling too much for too long.

Getting lost in myself has never hurt so much.

I don’t know

I don’t know if it was the fact that I moved away from the stress, or that I’m working out longer and harder, or that I’m eating so much less than I did before, but I made it guys.

Goal #1 has been reached. Collarbones are coming back and visible.

Just gotta keep going.

I’m getting bad again…

It’s festival season, and where I am, it’s really hot. I’ve been working out a lot and I’ve lost weight but my thighs and butt have gotten bigger with muscle, but none of last years shorts fit anymore.

I tried buying some new ones today. And although I have been in such a good place about my body, I haven’t felt this low since high school. I haven’t eaten at all today, and I know I should eat but I can’t justify it.

I just can’t do this again.

I feel like my life is burning.

Life punishes me every time I’m happy. I get hurt. People I love get hurt. And I can’t tell if it’s my fault anymore. I just want to be happy.

Opened myself up

Only to get heartbreak like every other time. I swear I never make the right choice.

BPD POST #19

When you took all the precautions to make sure a FP would never leave, but they do.

BPD POST #18

dissociating and having a self-identity crisis every 0.2 seconds.

BPD POST #16

Depriving yourself of sleep, food, showering, and all the necessities a human needs because you’re punishing yourself. Why? Because you feel like you don’t deserve any of it because you’re a shitty human being

thedarkperidot:

None of your trauma is your fault. ♡

tonight it all hurts…

Tbpdfw :

you beg someone to get back with you because the only thing worse then being with them is without them.

I am awkward and I have no filter and I don’t know why women speak to me but here we are

I sent that to someone on OKC. I’m officially the actual worst at this.

Me, explaining why I don’t connect with people

I’m not a crazy flake, I just play one in real life.

Becky: The clueless friend

Jane: The responsible friend

Issa: The funny friend

Me: The friend who disappears for a year and returns with a shaved head, 14 tattoos, 11 cats, and random facts about space or something.

Same.

*ghosts for 8 months*

“Hey man, pizza and bong rips??? ”

“Sounds good bro”

headache is an emotion