#trust issues
*puts earphones in*
*plays music*
*puts earphones out to check if the music plays loudly*
As well as in other situations I’m having great trust in myself and my ambitions!
please don’t fall out of love with me
I want to be truly wanted and appreciated.
I’m tired of people using me to feed their ego.
I just want someone to fall in love with me, and me with them.
So I can give them love and I receive the same amount in return.
Mutual love, effort, honesty, and loyalty.
_
I’m always good at finding out if someone is lying.
Might sometimes be a little late, but I find out. My gut feeling/intuition knows when something isn’t right.
I just wish there weren’t so many liars out there. It’s not that hard to be honest…
_
Why am I always:
The one waiting for someone.
The one who misses them more.
The one who loves them more.
The one who does more for them.
The one who’ll do everything for them.
?????
Why do I always feel like an afterthought?
I want what I give.
I deserve better.
_
For me trust is more important than love
If I’d had the insight and clarity of mind at the time to see the state I was living in, I would have sought professional help to work through the inner turmoil. It’s been a long, rough road to get to a place where the fear of letting someone in no longer breaks down my sense of agency. I tend to take my time now when it comes to getting to know people. I pay attention to warning signs. I know not to neglect my friendships when I engage with someone new. And someone’s level of respect for the boundaries I clearly lay out plays a huge role in whether or not I build trust with them.
Despite any precautions I make take, trauma still may not be altogether avoidable. But having people and resources in place to support me should anything happen has definitely enhanced my courage, strength and resilience. At the end of the day I want to experience deep intimacy and connection, and that can only happen if I open myself up to trust. I refuse to let fear keep me from having beautiful experiences, especially fear that stems from the abuse I went through. I lived in fear of him long enough; I feel that continuing to carry the fear with me would mean staying strongly connected to him and all those memories and I want no part of either. I am choosing to keep the lessons and release the fear.
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When someone tries to get me to open up
Really hate that i need constant validation from my friends in order to have any kind of social life lmao, like I’ll be in my feelings and suddenly get intensely paranoid that my friends don’t give a shit abt me and I have to out of the blue be like “hey man you.. you still like me right” because if I don’t I start splitting and end up pushing them away. And it feels like the single most pathetic bullshit in the world, wow,
listen i have trust issues,, just pinky promise,,, c’mon it’s not that hard,,, just promise with your pinky or i’ll think you don’t mean it,,
Snow fell last night and the mountains through my window reminded me of Dragonspine.
And of course these two smug cuties. I know everybody is having trust issues since the latest event but hey, we love Albedo nevertheless right? …Right?
I’ll continue to love him anyway. Albedo is one of my fav characters in the game and he has an interesting storyline.
He also came home so I’m overjoyed. ☺️
the story of my life
BEARS BEARS BEARS.
People dont understand what bear means to me so here’s the explanation.
Bears are usually portrayed as cuddly in media and stuff. Teddy bears, y know. Bears are known to care about their cubs like wolves about their pups but are more cuddly.
Usually if I give you a nickname with bear in it, there is a certain level of trust going on here. My last three bears were comfort characters and were supposed to never leave me. Only the last one tried his best (shout out to J-bear becuz y not).
Point is, bear means I trust you in some way.
This name slowly loses meaning because usually bears that I pick let me down.
hot food take (don’t burn your tongue), but lying about what you put in food that you’re giving to someone is fucked up even if the only reason is that they just don’t like that particular ingredient
I’m forever worried about people who find jealousy hot, or being possessive.
I think all this jealousy and/or anger can be really toxic.
To me it shows that they don’t trust you.
I want a partner who has trust in me and my love for them, and if they think they have a reason to not trust me or another person around me to talk to me about it so we can talk it through and I can assure them that they have nothing to worry about.
I don’t want someone who won’t communicate and instead get angry with me.
If it’s a kink roleplay thing that’s fine, but if it’s not it’s really worrying to me. Like, why don’t you trust me? Is it something I did? Something someone else did? Please talk to me.
Bitches with trust issues love enemies to lovers because they love the idea of seeing someones worst traits first and still be able to fall in love them without the everpresent underlying fear of weather their worst is something genuinely evil. It’s me. I’m bitches.
This has to be the best by far cover of trust issues I’ve seen. CHECK out Sid Sriram with his own rendition of the Drizzy Drake track. This right here is fire. Also be on the look out for more dope music from him he is soon to drop another mixtape / EP.
Poetic Trendz
Take a quick listen to the last After Show of 2015! “Cheating and Daddy Issues”.
http://insidethemalemind.com/podcast/2015/9/27/cheating-and-daddy-issues-itmm-009-aftershow-pt-2
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I’ve always been on my own, so if you leave that’s some regular shit.
As a kid I built a house around my broke heart.
My therapist told me don’t bury my issues,
But I'ma be honest, man, I’m feelin’ great!
It won’t always make sense. That’s okay.
Learn to be alone, because not everyone will stay.
