#makes me laugh

Tantrum Time

Okay but the reason why “everybody’s horny for Jiang Cheng” headcanons are so delightful to me, a terrible human, is because out of every character in the entire cast, he’s the one who would derive absolutely no pleasure or benefit from being lusted after from many sides.

Not because of whatever sexuality or experience you assign to him–that is absolutely irrelevant. The misery transcends all. In any situation, being the cultivation world’s hottie wouldn’t make him smug or happy. It would not increase his self-esteem or confidence; nor would it lessen his chasm-deep issues one centimeter. Best case scenario: it’s really annoying because he has shit to do and everybody is in his way. Worst case scenario: it gives him even more reasons to never trust anybody again. Universal scenario: it is so awkward to repeatedly hear how many people have sex fantasies about his mom’s whip.

For me, a person who loves making miserable fictional men even more miserable, this scenario is irresistible. Everybody’s horny for Jiang Cheng and it sucks for him. That is truly the gift that keeps on giving.